The One & Only LIVE WWA Retribution Thread

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

I'll start discussing what should be a pretty bad WWA Retribution show between bouts of FOX's Sunday Night lineup.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Apparently the sub-title (they're all the rage these days) is "A Time for Payback."

 

And here it comes.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Okay, so they moved it to the Indy folder.

 

Andre McManus brings in Mike Sanders. He brings up all the doomed commisioners of the past, and even mentions taking over Ric Flair's job in WCW.

 

We're live from Glassgow, Scotland, and of course, we get the fucking bagpipes.

 

This one's already going downhill.

[Guest DeputyHawk]

We're live from Glassgow, Scotland, and of course, we get the fucking bagpipes.

 

This one's already going downhill.

bitch.

 

**applies his blue facepaint**

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Jeremy Borash welcomes us. Yuck.

 

He introduces us to his broadcast partner, Disco Inferno. I loved Disco's "smart" commentary on the past show, so hopefully he'll be doing much of the same for this one.

 

Okay, so Borash is announcing and the introductions?

 

Shark Boy (!) vs. Frankie Kazarian is up next.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

It takes all of us eight seconds for the INDY WRESTLING SEQUENCE.

 

Kazarian gets sent to the outside, and Shark boy pescados onto him. Shark Boy flings Kazarian into the ring, but Frankie drop toe holds Shark Boy into the corner. Shark Boy comes back with an atomic drop, and Frankie bites Frankie and the referee in the ass.

 

Yes, folks, Shark Boy is God.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Kazarian comes back with a flying leg lariat, and takes Shark Boy down with a chinlock.

 

Borash: "Kazarian with a headlock."

Disco: "Actually, that's a rear chinlock."

 

Frankie sends Shark Boy to the outside, and Disco throws out the "blatantly telegraphed" line. Springboard legdrop by Frankie gets two, and the fans are booing him quite loudly. Could be canned heat.

 

Kazarian misses the legdrop, and Shark Boy comes back. Neckbreaker from Shark Boy.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Is anyone actually watching this PPV?

 

Ten punches in the corner, along with the ol' bite to the face from Shark Boy. Very good top rope huruncanruna gets two, and the fans are going along with the "1, 2" when Shark Boy goes for the pin. Superkick by Kazarian, and a weird move by Kazarian called "Back to the Future" where he sets Shark Boy up on his neck while he's grabbing his arm and drops back. That gets two. Shark Boy comes back, and applies the Diamond Dust (flipping Top Rope Stunner) for the win.

 

* 1/4.

 

Too short to be anything.

[Guest DeputyHawk]

hey gigolo, what's the crowd look like on camera? there were a lot of empty seats where the hard camera was facing and they moved people from the edges up there during the intermission.

 

also, how is the crowd coming across? there were a lot of random scottish chants going up which would make no sense to american audiences, i wonder if they edited any of them out. "you fat bastard, you fat bastard, who ate all the pies?" directed at luger was a particular favourite.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Time for Mike Sanders to grab the stick!

 

Sanders gets some pops by calling Disco Inferno a jackass. He then starts kissing up to the crowd, and mentions all the names on the card. Right when he gets to Buff Bagwell, some music begins to play. It soon turns off, and Sanders gets back to the promo without a hitch.

 

Nice one jackasses.

 

Some fans are "What?"ing Sanders. Luger gets booed, Sting gets a big pop.

 

Joe. E. Legend interupts Sanders, and he looks like a member of Kronic.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Legends talks about how he has beat everyone on the card. "Heroes come and go, but legends live forever."

 

Sanders with the baby voice. "I beat Lex Luger, I slept with the Disco Inferno." Heh.

 

Staredown time.

 

"You look like the gimp from Pulp Fiction, along with Elton John's life partner." - Legend

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Sanders looks in his pocket for something, and pulls his middle finger out of the pocket. Sanders says him and Legend will fight later.

 

Legend: "Wait, wait, wait."

Sanders: "Shhh... Bitch!"

 

Nate 'Spyder' Webb vs. - Wow, this is a totally different guy from who I thought he was. His gimmick is that of a British punk rocker. Well, Perry Saturn attacks, T-Boning and powerbombinb Webb. He tosses the ref aside. DVD to Webb. Rings of Saturn to Webb.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Saturn walks away, and Konnan comes out now.

 

He lays on Webb, and the referee makes the count. 1-2-3

 

Rating: *****

 

A three-second Konnan match is a great match.

 

Right after I write that Konnan comes to the announce booth, and Disco brings up the star rating system. "I'd like to see how the internet rates that match. I give it ****" - Disco

[Guest DeputyHawk]

uh, okay you're ignoring me. have fun spamming in here on your own, i guess.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Backstage, Teo wants Madajiah to be his valet. The fat midget comes in and calls Madajiah a ho, and Teo calls Madajiah his girlfriend. Both of them are wrong, says Madajiah.

 

Mike Sanders comes in, and he says that Madajiah will be the guest referee.

 

"Yeah, yeah, she's a top dollar ho."

 

Word.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Hey deputyhawk, sorry about that, didn't notice your post.

 

The corwd looks pretty good on camera. Everything beyond the fifteenth row or so is blackened out. Haven't heard many chants yet.

 

Buff Bagwell and Johnny Swinger are out to face Smiley and his partner.

 

Disco: "Why does Smiley always dance? If there's one thing that doesn't belong in wrestling it's ridiculous dance moves."

 

The heels jump Smiley before Malice gets to the ring. The Disciples of the New Church's music plays, and Malice is out to clear the ring.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

What the fuck is Borash talking about. He says that Bagwell enjoyed the most success in his career when he was in a tag team. American Males? Vicious and Delicious?

 

Konnan speaks, and all you hear is silenced.

 

Buff poses, which prompts Malice to a dance that ends with the "devil finger salute." Thanks for that one Borash, you idiot.

 

Malice takes Buff down, and then busts out a backbreaker. Bagwell comes back with a jawjacker, and Swinger is in. Back suplex by Malice, and he tags in Smiley.

 

Man, this is really uninteresting.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Wow, I'm glad my internet cut out on me during this match, because absolutely nothing of note has happened.

 

Konnan: "Swinger and Buff are very popular in the Glassgow bathhouses."

 

Bagwell seems so uninterested in here.

 

Hot tag to Malice, and he big boots and slams the heels. Clotheslines Buff to the outside while Smiley hits his spinning bodyslam on Swinger. Yes Smiley, SMACK THAT BITCH UP!

 

Unfortunately, Swinger low blows Smiley, allowing Buff to hit the Top Rope Blockbuster for the win.

 

The forum wasn't working for me for a few minutes, but now Teo and the other midget are fighting. Teo just hit the worst 619 I've ever seen.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

I switched over to The Simpsons, and next thing I knew, Teo won.

 

And Perry Saturn runs out and destroys Teo with a big boot. Slam on the fat one, and a DVD to Teo. Rings of Saturn to Puppet (the fat one), and now he takes the mic.

 

Saturn says he's signed with the WWA, he flirts with Madajiah, and when she slaps him, Perry grabs her. He kisses her ("How easy is she?" - Disco), and drags her away.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Joe E. Legend vs. Mike Sanders is going on now, and this PPV is just so underwhelming that I'm quitting while I'm still awake.

 

Well, so much for this thread.

[Guest HorsemenGlory]

Wow, that was bad.

[Guest Galactic Gigolo]

Wow, that was bad.

Malcolm in the Middle, though, kicked all sorts of ass.

[Guest Sykotic2002]

WOW! A whole 21 replies from a total of about 3 or 4 people. I guess not many people watched it. I watched it. It was what you would expect from a WWA PPV. I can't stand Borash as a commentator. How minor league does it look when the commentator has to get up every match to go in the ring to ring announce. Als from reading the latest WON, they aren't bringing back Luger and Bagwell after all the problems they had with them on the tour.

[Chunk 0]

How minor league does it look when the commentator has to get up every match to go in the ring to ring announce

 

Yeah, that is pretty bad lol

 

It could be worse though:

 

Luger: "Introducing your main event. Making his way to the ring ... Lex, The Total Package, Luger".

 

:Sprint to gorilla area:

 

:walks down the ramp:

 

"And his opponent ....."

 

Now that would be worth seeing,

 

ChUnK!

[Guest The Hollywood Fashion Plate]

Any pics of the PPV logo or set? I collect those things, you know.