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Posted

National guardman changed his name to a toy

 

CUYAHOGA FALLS -- A member of Ohio's 5694th National Guard Unit in Mansfield legally changed his name to a Transformers toy.

 

Optimus Prime is heading out to the Middle East with his guard unit on Wednesday to provide fire protection for airfields under combat.

 

"On Sunday, we were awarded as the best firefighting unit in the Army National Guard in the entire country," said Prime. "That was a big moment for us."

 

Prime took his name from the leader of the Autobots Transformers, which were popular toys and a children's cartoon in the 1980s.

 

He legally changed his name on his 30th birthday and now it's on everything from his driver's licence, to his military ID, to his uniform.

 

"They razzed me for three months to no end," said Prime. "They really dug into me about it."

 

"I got a letter from a general at the Pentagon when the name change went through and he says it was great to have the employ of the commander of the Autobots in the National Guard."

 

Prime says the toy actually filled a void in his life when it came out.

 

"My dad passed away the year before and I didn't have anybody really around, so I really latched onto him when i was a kid," he said.

Guest EricMM
Posted

We're saved. This war is over, folks.

 

Iraqi advisor: Sir we just received word that Optimus Prime has joined the enemy ranks!

 

Saddam H.: HOLY SHIT! He's a robot AND a truck! We're screwed!

Posted
We're saved. This war is over, folks.

 

Iraqi advisor: Sir we just received word that Optimus Prime has joined the enemy ranks!

 

Saddam H.: HOLY SHIT! He's a robot AND a truck! We're screwed!

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Guest MD2020
Posted

If he really wanted to go Transformers, he should have changed it to "Starscream". Now, there was a bad-ass Decepticon.

Posted

I wonder how long until an Iraqi officer renames himself to "Megatron".

Guest Kotzenjunge
Posted

Optimus Prime is the coolest name anyone can ever have. EVER.

Guest Blue Bacchus
Posted

I've read about this guy before. He changed his name after a terrible divorce. Further Evidence in the case that I'm building against women in general.

 

If he really wanted to go Transformers, he should have changed it to "Starscream". Now, there was a bad-ass Decepticon.

 

Damn Straight! ::Checks Sig and Avatar::

Guest JangoFett4Hire
Posted

I guess bumble bee was out of the question

Guest CED Ordonez
Posted

I wonder if he's ever tempted to give the command of "Autobots, transform and roll out."

Guest saturnmark4life
Posted

Fucker beat me to it. Congrats to him.

Guest the pinjockey
Posted

The first thing I thought of when i read this was Saddam sitting in his mansion then all of a sudden out of thin air music starts blasting through the air.

 

"You got the touch, dun dun dun, you got the powerrrrrrrrr!"

 

Then Prime drives through the wall and runs over everything and everyone.

 

Now the rest of his troops need to take on names. (At least as nicknames)

Guest MrRant
Posted

I would picture him running over a bunch of Republican guards and then in slow motion to "You got the touch, dun dun dun, you got the powerrrrrrrrr!" he transformers and blows away the remaining Republican guard and Saddam.

Guest Hogan Made Wrestling
Posted

Optimus: One Shall Stand, One Shall Fall.

 

Sadaam: I'll Crush You With My Bare Hands Optimus!

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