PROMO: X-Rays and Morphine

[Guest Coffin Surfer]

Seated in a hospital room, Danny Williams impatiently taps his foot on the floor, awaiting the results of his X-Rays. His head is killing him, only adding to his irritation. He checks his watch for what has to be the twentieth time, discovering he’s been waiting for way over a half hour.

 

“Fuck the results! I’ll give him 15 more minutes, than I’m gone.”, Danny thinks to himself.

 

Trying to keep his mind off his killer migraine, Williams once again looks over the dump of an examination room. Paint is peeling off the walls, cracks can be found every couple of inches, and there is rusty patches on the floor that could be easily mistaken for blood stains. With that in mind, Williams comes to the conclusion that the SWF really needs a better health care plan.

 

RING! RING!

 

Williams rolls his eyes as he pulls removes his noisy cell phone from his coat pocket, and answers with an annoyed “hello.”

 

.....

 

Upon hearing the voice on the other line, Williams snarls,”Look, you just tell Tom, that I’m out!”

......

 

“WHY! For starters I can’t stand the guy, never could! I remember back when it was Wilson, me, Frost, and TNT....now that was a stable to be feared. But than Tom comes in out of nowhere, proclaims himself our new leader, and than precedes to turn it into a damn midget haven!”

 

There’s a shuffling behind the door, prompting Williams to cut his rant short,”I gotta go, the Doctor's finally here!”

 

Williams puts the phone away, and locks his eyes at the door, which violently swings open.....

 

revealing a short man with messy black hair, sporting an unstylish goatee.

 

“HELLO EVERYBODY!”greets the doctor with wide open arms.

 

Williams just stares at him for a few moments, hesitates, and than mumbles,”Hello.....Doctor Nick.”

 

Nick Rivera digs into his pockets producing a pair of pink gloves, which he loosely slides on, while explaining,”These gloves came free with my toilet brush.”

 

With a mini flash light, Nick carefully checks out Danny’s eyes.

 

After casually examining Williams’ pupils, Nick asks,”Now when you was in that coma, could you feel your brain being damaged?”

 

“Uh I don’t think so, what did the X-Rays show?” questions a confused Danny Williams.

 

“Oh yes, the X-Rays!” shouts Rivera, who slides the photos of Danny’s skull from a vanilla envelope, letting them spill out on to the floor.

 

Williams watches on in worry as Nick shuffles through the X-Rays like a kid in a toy chest. Finding one he likes, Nick picks it up, dusts it off, and hangs the image of Danny’s skull up like it’s dirty laundry.

 

Pointing to Williams’ brain cavity, Nick explains, “Now you see this smudge that looks like a finger print, THAT’S TRAUMA!”

 

“Really, than what’s all that cloudy stuff?”, questions Danny.

 

With squinting eyes, Doctor Nick inspects the clouds in question, and concludes,”That? I don’t know what the hell that is?”, changing the subject, Doctor Nick continues,”But the trauma suggests that you do have a concussion!”

 

“A concussion?”, sighs Danny

 

Nick confirms,”Yep!”

 

“Great!” sarcastically proclaims Danny, before asking,” So when can I return to the ring?”

 

Rivera scratches his chin in deep thought before responding, “The ring, Ah yes...............three months!”

 

“THREE MONTHS!”

 

“Oh! Did I say two months, I meant.......one month...MAYBE LESS!”chuckles Doctor Nick.

 

Looking very melancholy, Williams groans,”A month..........oh well, could be worse.”

 

“Yeah, your skeleton could be trying to jump out of your body!”, adds Nick in a surprisingly serious tone.

 

Puzzled, Williams awkwardly nods in agreement. Suddenly, Nick pulls a gigantic syringe out of nowhere!

 

“WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?” demands a shocked Danny Williams.

 

“It’s morphine, the grand daddy of all pain killers.”

 

“Don’t you think that’s a little extreme for a head ache?”

 

“No silly, it’s not for you it’s for me!”, explains Nick as he shoots up.

 

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh, that’s the stuff.” moans a glassy eyed Doctor Nick, as he slumps back in his stool with glazed over eyes.

 

“Well, I guess should be going now.”, comments Danny as he nervously gets out of his chair, and makes his way out of the room in a hurry.

[Guest Dace59]

LMAO!

 

 

That was some classic ripping of man. I like it.

 

Can't wait to see you back.

 

Rock on dude.

 

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

Heh, great promo.

 

 

Hope to see you soon dude...

[Guest Ace309]

Best. Ripoff. Ever.

 

Although Lionel Hutz should have made an appearance.

[Guest 5_moves_of_doom]

Danny now > Danny before this promo