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The Dames' Diatribe on NWA:TNA Week 41

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Guest TSMAdmin

The Dames Diatribe on NWA:TNA Week 41



For those of you expecting this Diatribe for the past few days with a heroine addict-like twitch, finally your fix has arrived. Believe me when I tell you that an explanation is definitely due.


To truly make you understand my pain and suffering, we’re going to go back in time to June of 1998. I was accepted into Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute (RPI) in Troy, NY for their computer science program and naturally, needed a computer of my own. On a side note, beginning in ’99, an IBM laptop has become part of RPI’s overpriced tuition fee….so its pretty much mandatory. Anyway, I had never owned my own personal PC and was ecstatic when I purchased a Gateway, known as a Gateway 2000 back then. It was a 266Mhz computer with 64MB of RAM and it ran like a dream.


Now, I went to RPI two weeks after my high school graduation as I was part of a special program for minorities called the HEOP program. I packed up all of my things and was told at the last second that the computer…could NOT come with me for the summer. Basically, they didn’t want us to be distracted by having computers in our rooms during the intense program…but a good friend of mine snuck his in anyway and I gravitated towards his room.


Fast forward two months later and the school year has begun. Not THREE WEEKS into the semester, something happened to my computer and I was forced to reformat my hard drive. Being on a high speed network, I downloaded a ton of stuff and throughout the years. Eventually, my computer became tremendously slow and outdated compared to everyone else’s brand new required laptops and I felt obsolete. Then the shit really started to hit the fan. My roommate was a big fan of the Starcraft games and would allow his friends to play on my computer and download whatever was necessary in order for them to play while I was in class. Oh, you bet I cut that shit out quickly. But I felt the ramifications long after. Tons of programs uninstalled incorrectly and spyware hampered my computer to the point where even moving the mouse was a chore. I ran a virus scan and found a little under a THOUSAND viruses on it. I eventually was able to clean it all out.


Well, long story short, I had no money for a new PC and when I got home, it was all I had. Becoming the internet junkie that I have, I depended on it for most of my entertainment (and wrestling knowledge) and was forced to play with the hand I was dealt with. Then, another new phenomenon occurred. My computer was starting to literally shut off, without warning, at random times, causing tons of frustrations…and even hampering a few TSM reports along the way. Damn, I needed a new PC.


Fast forward once again to last Wednesday as I was finally able to afford a new Dell PC and it arrived while I had a few days off from work. Throughout the years, I’ve archived tons of files that mean a great deal to me, rare mp3s, pictures that I can never find again, things like that and didn’t want to lose any of it. So, I began the process of transferring my files from the old Gateway to Hell and the new Dell. The total time estimated: SIXTY HOURS and 45 Minutes. I was amazed that my old computer didn’t shut down in the middle of the transfer. It didn’t help that my old computer was running Windows 95 all this time while the new Dell runs Windows XP either.


So that’s where I’ve been in the past few days. I finished the transfer sometime last night and was able to finally log on to download updated versions of programs that I had on my computer, like Winamp and Winzip and ACDSee. But, I still have a TNA report to do so I’m sacrificing my Saturday night for you people. You should all send me some sort of feedback in appreciation, damn you. Besides, I had no plans for this weekend besides recapping WWE Backlash, which will be exclusive to my site, TheSmartMarks.com.


After the new, lengthy FBI warning on piracy, the PPV starts in the way it normally has in the past month or so – a video package covering all of the current events of the recent storylines in TNA.


At the end of it, there’s a new twist as we don’t segue right into the show, but a pretaped promo by Raven. He’s sitting down in a candlelit room with the camera tilted, focused on him as the he sits between Laree and Julio Dinero’s feet. This camera shot and setting just SCREAMS “old school ECW backstage promo” for Raven and I’m loving it already. He talks about the fact that the Jarrett/Raven NWA Title match is in 7 days….but tonight, he’s going to drop the mother of all bombs on the Champ. He refers to Alexis Laree and Julio (who has apparently dropped the Dinero part of his moniker) as his “Gathering” in this promo as well.


Tenay welcomes us to TNA as well as Australia…which confuses me because I could have sworn that the Aussie’s would get the Raven/Jarrett title match instead of the build up for it.


We go right to the back where Goldylocks is with Glen Gilberti and Mike Sanders, who’s dressed in a doorag (or is it doo-rag…or durag?) a SEX shirt, beige jean shorts and wearing sunglasses. Gilberti calls it a throwback to his days as “Above Average” Mike Sanders where he was most successful in WCW. I’ll admit, it’s better than his recent Ice Train-esque ring attire. Gilberti and Sanders argue about the level of Sanders talent until Sonny Siaki and the rest of S.E.X. walk up to them. Gilberti gets Siaki to take off his sunglasses and slaps the hell out of him. In a nice touch, David Young gets right in Gilberti’s face to defend his new mentor but backs off quickly from the S.E.X. leader. Gilberti admonishes them all for being late to the arena and goes back to address Goldylocks again once they leave, but AJ Styles and D’Lo Brown attack them from behind and this tag team match up has just begun!


AJ Styles & D’Lo Brown vs. Glen Gilberti & Mike Sanders


Match Background: AJ Styles has been an enemy of the S.E.X. faction ever since Glen Gilberti directly cost him the #1 Contendership for the NWA World Title against Raven in a ladder match. He’s taken on Gilberti and Sanders in singles matches, including a street fight last week which Gilberti won clean. During the match, however, Sanders did interfere towards the beginning of the match, but D’Lo Brown came to even the odds. D’Lo Brown has been at odds with S.E.X. after they also cost him the World Title in a match with Jarrett. He defeated Mike Sanders in Week 39, but was beat down afterwards by Gilberti and Siaki. Now, these two men, both spurned by S.E.X. and Gilberti are teaming up to take him and Sanders on tonight.


The Match: Styles and Brown beat them down as they head towards the ring. AJ Styles injured his left knee this past weekend as well, according to Tenay and West as the babyfaces dominate in the ring. Brown slams Styles on Gilberti for some innovative offense at the start of the in ring action. Styles gets a superkick on Gilberti and tags in D’Lo, who top rope clotheslines S.E.X.’s leader as he’s irish whipped towards him. SHAKY SHAKY Legdrop gets a two count as well, but zero heat from the Nashville crowd. In the corner, Styles and D’Lo chop Gilberti in unison a few times as Styles comes back into the match. Gilberti makes a comeback as he dropkicks Styles bad knee and tags in Sanders, who also works on it with a unique dragon screw legwhip. Sanders goes after Styles leg with a vengeance for a few until Gilberti comes in and works on it as well. Side Russian Legsweep by Gilberti leads to an elbow drop for two on Styles as well. Sanders comes back in and works on the leg again and Styles is selling it like MAD. Gilberti tags back in and goes for a second rope elbowdrop and misses and looks to have injured his wrist on impact as well. He tags out to Sanders as D’Lo comes in all HOUSE..EN..FUEGO~!-like. He goes for some punches in the corner on Sanders, but Gilberti comes from behind. Styles German suplexes Gilberti before he can do anything though. The distraction still worked as Sanders is able to hit the DOUBLE SHOT~! for two. Sanders goes for a tilt-a-whirl, but D’Lo reverses it into Sudden Impact! He signals for the Lo Down and heads to the top and gets it for a broken up two count. Gilberti gets up and kicks Styles in the bad leg before going back to Brown in a great heelish move there. He goes for the ChartBuster (or Last Dance) or whatever he calls his Stone Cold Stunner now that he’s no longer Disco Inferno, but he’s shoved into the ropes into the Sky High for a broken up two count! Sanders comes off the ropes, but Styles kicks him in the back of the head with his bad leg from behind, allowing D’Lo to hit Gilberti with a leg lariat. He tells Styles to get on the top rope and he does…but Daniels and Skipper come in for the DQ.


Winners: AJ Styles & D’Lo Brown via DQ through interference.


My Opinion: The match was decent, although it was a little too slow for my liking. The psychology of the match was decent as well as Styles sold his legit injured knee well while the heels attacked it at every opportunity. I’ve become a fan of Gilberti’s work as of late, although I have one slight criticism about his finisher. The “ChartBuster” or Stone Cold Stunner that he attempts rarely ever hits and the lone time it has hit in TNA (last week) the only reason the move was as effective as it was is because Styles’s throat ending up getting rammed into a steel chair with it. The announcers never play it up, never put it over…and now that he’s dropped the Disco character, it doesn’t even have a name. Gilberti is creative…I’m sure he can come up with one. The ending also doesn’t help this match much with the DQ. **


Lynn and Red come to the ring and dispose of Triple X, but Sonny Siaki and David Young come into the ring and attack from behind. SNAP SPINEBUSTERS~! for the tag champs put them down long enough for Triple X to come back in and take their shots at Lynn and Red as well.


In the back, Goldylocks is with Jeff Jarrett who says that he’s going to be the hunter instead of the hunted against Raven. He takes a shot at ECW as he gets his point across until Eric Watts comes into the picture and interrupts Jeff. “Hey, nice belt, I got once just like it.” He tells Jarrett that this feud is becoming too violent and too “extreme” than it should…instead of peace, love and understanding. Jarrett tells him to get lost, but Watts tells him that he’s on HIS side and he’s going to do him a favor. He’s going to find Raven, talk to him and make him listen to reason and if he doesn’t want to…he’ll put a straightjacket on him, which Watts has with him. He goes on a quest to find Raven as the segment ends. Watts delivery tonight was actually pretty amusing.


Tenay and West run down the card until we go to Goldylocks in the back.


In the back…Chris Harris is down and being worked on by officials. James Storm comes running in to check on him and it appears that he’s not in any shape to wrestle tonight. Oh Harris is SO turning heel tonight.


Triple X (Elix Skipper & Christopher Daniels) vs. Americas Most Wanted for the #1 Contendership for the NWA Tag Titles.


Match Background: In the past few weeks, AMW have had differences as Chris Harris has requested to have a few singles matches while James Storm has just sat in the sidelines and watched. Then, Harris was seen in the S.E.X. locker room hanging out with Triple X, the same men who defeated AMW for the Tag Team Titles in the first place. When confronted by Storm about it, Harris told him that he was only lobbying for a tag title shot as Triple X were the tag champs at the time. In a sit down interview with Mike Tenay last week, Storm let Harris know of his displeasure and didn’t approve of his association with the S.E.X. boys. Last week, Triple X were defeated by Lynn and Red (or F’n Amazing, which is what I like to call them. Thanks Corey.) and want a tag title rematch. They’ll have to go through the former 2 time tag team champions AMW though, who haven’t had a tag title match in quite some time now.


The Match: Elix Skipper comes in and takes THE STICK~! He apologizes to the audience…since he assumes that James Storm doesn’t have the balls to face them two on one. He must not watch enough wrestling. He should also apologize to the audience for that promo…it really wasn’t good at all. Naturally, James Storm comes running down alone and starts the match off as a HOUSE..EN…FUEGO~! Daniels tries to stop the momentum with a thumb to the eye and throws him over the top, but Storm skins the cat back in, sends Daniels to the outside and elevates Elix up and over the top onto his partner. He then capitalizes by going over the top with a somersault tope onto the two of them. The Heel Section crack me up by putting Smackdown Spoilers up on their signs at ringside. It was funny on Wednesday, okay! Back in the ring, Storm gets a few moves on Daniels until he’s able to tag out to Skipper. Storm takes over and him too and gets a few broken up two counts. Triple X finally take over after Daniels kicks Storm from behind as he comes off the ropes and Elix gets a belly to belly in. Daniels and Skipper with some quick tags as they work over Storm for a bit as the crowd chants “Lets Go Storm”. Storm gets a quick comeback, but Skipper gets an overhead belly to belly suplex to end it. Daniels comes in and mocks the crowd with a “Lets Go Storm” chant of his own before going back on work on the Cowboy. Triple X get some double team moves on Storm, including an elbow off the top while Storm is in an overhead backbreaker position until Chris Harris comes stumbling down the aisle. He gets on the apron and BEGS for the tag! He might as well have “I’m Turning Heel” tattooed on his chest right now. Storm gets up with an added surge of energy and clotheslines Daniels down. He collapses as well and goes to tag Harris, but Elix comes sprinting across the ring to nail Harris and knock him off the apron! Elix and Daniels continue the double team on Storm, but Storm gets a superkick on Elix allowing him to make the HOT TAG to Chris Harris! BUT….the ref didn’t see the tag and Triple X take over again. I wonder if Storm actually caught a break there…hmm. The crowd is really getting into this one, chanting “Bullshit” at the ref’s blindness. Daniels rags on the crowd as he works over Storm in the corner. Storm is able to counter both men with a Nova-like double move and finally tags in Harris!


Harris comes in….and actually goes after Elix and Daniels with right hands! He hits a Full Nelson Slam on Skipper for a close two, as he still sells the after effects of the backstage beating. Triple X end up taking over on Harris though as Elix gets a twisting slingshot press onto him for two. Storm comes back in to help and ends up getting the Swinging Noose on Daniels! ONE…TWO…NO! He heads to the top, but Elix uses Daniels back as a springboard to dropkick Storm off of the top rope. Triple X go back to work on Harris and Daniels gets his double jump moonsault for ONE…TWO…NO! They go for another double team, but Harris gets an inside cradle for a close two! Harris and Skipper are alone in the ring now and Skipper goes for a springboard cross body…but Harris spears him in mid air! ONE…TWO…NO! Harris gets up and goes for the Catatonic on Skipper…but Daniels low blows him from behind, allowing Skipper to roll him up for the ONE…TWO…THREE.


Winners: Triple X


After the match…Storm gets upset with Harris and walks to the back alone.


My Opinion: Damn good match as it definitely caught me off guard. It seemed so obvious that Harris was turning that I was pleasantly surprised that he didn’t when he was finally tagged in. It seemed as if the majority of the match was leading up to it as well. Storm turning his back on Harris after the match is definitely a new twist on AMW’s storyline as the direction was on Harris turning heel, not Storm. They worked their asses off though, like they usually do and produced a well laid out match. So now Triple X face F’n Amazing in a rematch for the Tag Titles next week and it is all good with me. **3/4.


Goldylocks is in the back with Alexis Laree (who is looking even BETTER this week) and Alexis talks about taking out Jeff Jarrett. Amazingly, even though she’s part of Raven’s latest Gathering group, she doesn’t talk or any different in this promo. She goes off to find Jeff Jarrett and bursts into a room. She grabs Sara Lee (female oldtime wrestler who sells tickets at the Asylum) and throws her against a wall. Jarrett grabs Laree from behind and throws her into a wall! He nails her with a trashcan and keeps beating on her in the parking lot! He throws her into the back of a pick up truck and walks away. Although I’ve never been a fan of women being attacked by men in wrestling, this does show that Jarrett still has his WWF circa ’99 misogynistic ways about him and how desperate he is to keep his title.


Back at ringside, Watts asks Tenay and West where he can find Raven so he can talk to him. West actually believes that Watts is sincere about helping Jarrett. Tenay doesn’t buy it though. “You think he’s going to return the NWA Title to Dusty Rhodes?” For the last time….IT DOESN’T BELONG TO RHODES. Geez.


We go to a pre-taped promo by Father James Mitchell who is standing in the ring. He talks about the Ultimate Sin Match and what it composes of. There will be barbed wire wrapped around the ropes and grates an orange on the barbed wire to demonstrate that it’s not “WCW barbed wire”. There will be a cane on a pole as well as trashcans in the ring along with tables set up at ringside. The kicker though is a baseball bat hanging from the top of the ring which has to be retrieved via a ladder. This was a great promo as Mitchell was just on with his evilness in describing the weapons of destruction.


Team Extreme (New Jack, Perry Saturn & Sandman) vs. The Disciples of the New Church (Slash, Brian Lee & Mike Awesome) (w/Father James Mitchell) in an Ultimate Sin Match


Match Background: This all started about a month ago when The Disciples teamed up with Sandman and Perry Saturn to take on The Harris Brothers and Triple X. After winning the match, Mitchell offered the Disciples services in a 6 man tag team rematch, but Sandman and Saturn declined as they brought in New Jack. The Disciples and Mitchell didn’t appreciate it and caused them to lose the match against the Harris’. The teams then wrestled in a triple threat tag match, which the Harris’ also won when Sandman and New Jack ran into some communications issues. While they argued about it in the back, The Disciples attacked them from behind. Last week, a portly Mike Awesome debuted as a member of the New Church and took on Perry Saturn. Later on, the Disciples took on New Jack and Sandman and Mike Awesome ran in. The Disciples actually cleared the ring of Team Extreme until the lights went out and Justin Credible made his TNA debut, caning the Disciples until they went scattering and giving Team Extreme a one man advantage in this feud.


The Match: It’s got to be noted that Saturn is wearing an old school ECW Hardcore Wrestling tank top to the ring as Sandman brings his usual assortment of beer and cigarettes and New Jack brings the sharp weaponry. The match starts with New Jack busting Slash open immediately with his sickle! He starts carving into his head and then nailing Slash in the forehead with a fork as Saturn uses the ladder on Awesome. New Jack gets his staple gun out, along with a dollar bill and goes to use it on Slash, but Slash hits him with a low blow. He takes the gun and staples the bill to Jack’s forehead! Lee is dominating Sandman on the outside as Slash works over New Jack with a cookie cutter and a trashcan. Awesome and Saturn aren’t doing much in the ring. Jack and Slash brawl on the outside as back in, Saturn superkicks Mike Awesome into the ropes and into the barbed wire. He then front suplexes him onto the barbed wire allowing Saturn to go for the cane on the pole. Awesome is up quickly and doesn’t have any visible cuts and Awesome Bombs Saturn onto a trashcan after Lee keeps him from getting the cane on the pole. Sandman grabs the pole and uses it repeatedly on Awesome until Lee throws a trashcan to his head. Saturn gets up and nails Lee with one as well. New Jack and Slash are still battling at ringside…and New Jack places Slash’s head in one of those things you squeeze mops with. The ugliest side Russian leg sweep ever occurs in the ring as Saturn uses it on Brian Lee in the ring. The announcers put over the extremeness of the match while the competitors aren’t doing much of anything at the moment. Saturn drops Slash with a Death Valley Driver as Mike Awesome sit out powerbombs Sandman from the apron through a table! It looks like Awesome took the worst of it too. New Jack sets up Lee on a table and Saturn flies off the top to crush him through it! New Jack grabs a chair and heads to the top! He nails Slash with it off the top and Slash kicks out at two! He sets up the ladder to go get the bat, but Slash gets up and tips it over! Jack goes flying over the top through a table at ringside! Slash climbs the ladder and reaches up for the ladder when the lights go out! They come back on and Justin Credible is on the ladder fighting with Slash. Saturn gets up and powerbombs Slash down. He has some trouble grabbing the bat, but ends up yanking it down anyway. He jumps off the ladder and hits Slash on the top of the head with it on the way down, leading to Saturn getting the pin. Saturn gets on the ladder and does the X symbol with his arms as Team Extreme celebrate.


Winners: Saturn, Sandman and New Jack


My Opinion: I wasn’t expecting much out of this match and I wasn’t really surprised in the very least from it. The only thing that slightly sticks out is that the barbed wire was used only once and Awesome showed no real damage from it, taking away from the gimmick. Slash and Saturn were definitely the best performers in this match. Lee and Sandman weren’t featured much by the cameramen, probably because they didn’t do much of anything of importance. The finish of the match was pretty obvious, although it would make no sense for TNA to turn off the lights for Justin Credible for the second week in a row. *


We now go to a video package highlighting the problems between Trinity and Kid Kash.


Mike Tenay welcomes Kid Kash as the crowd jeers. Tenay calls him gutless as he talks about Kash’s vow to Trinity last week. Kash says that’s just Tenay’s opinion and he feels differently. He says that he discovered Trinity as he takes an undeserved shot at Divine Storm, calling them “two jabrones from New York City”. He then says that Trinity doesn’t have a TNA contract….she has a personal services contract with Kid Kash. He elicits some boos by being a complete chauvinist and saying that he “owns” her. Trinity makes her way to the ring, wearing a nice little orange number. She gets on the microphone and starts talking when Kash SLAPS THE SHIT OUT OF HER. WOW! That was one of the most heelish things I’ve EVER seen! Tenay goes ballistic as Kash talks down to her…but she gets back up and slaps him! Kash issues a challenge to Trinity right then and there…and Trinity accepts with right hands!


Kid Kash vs. Trinity – Non Title Match.


Match Background: When Kid Kash was going up against Sonny Siaki and Desire for the X Division Title, Trinity became his second at ringside, helping him take on Siaki and ultimately winning the X Title from him. Since then, she’s helped him greatly in his X Title defenses, a point which Red pointed out when he confronted Kash and Trinity. Red challenged her to a match…but Kash said that she’s just a girl and that she’s not supposed to be a wrestler, something that Trinity took offense to. Eventually, a triple threat match was signed, which Kash won when he capitalized on Trinity’s offense. It seemed apparent that Kash didn’t appreciate her taking the spotlight and getting the bigger pops from the crowd. A few weeks later, Kash defended the title against Raven and stood idly by as he DDT’ed her and didn’t even bother to come to her defense. The following week, he interrupted a sit down interview between her and Mike Tenay to make sure that she realized that this isn’t “the Trinity show” and that her sole purpose was to help him. She didn’t take too kindly to that either as she walked out on him later on that night, leading to him being pinned by Raven. Last week, Kash tried to make things better by telling her that he would be there for her…and kissed her. She accepted his apology and helped him defeat Mike Sanders last week…but ran out of the ring and allowed the Harris Brothers to H-Bomb her after the match, going back on his word and abandoning her for the second time.


The Match: The crowd is just HOT as Trinity gets a tilt a while on Kash to start the match and some right hands with FIRE. She goes for a somersault legdrop, but Kash moves out of the way. Trinity goes for a roll up on Kash, but he holds onto the ropes. Trinity gets a sunset flip on Kash for two before elevating him onto the apron and roundhouse kicking him down! She gets on the top and moonsaults onto him on the outside! “TNA” chant by the crowd as they are REALLY into this. Trinity goes to whip him into the guard rail, but he reverses it and she tastes the steel. She staggers out…and WHAM! She gets NAILED with the Smashmouth! I swear, I’ve insulted the move and Kid Kash’s use of it many times…but I don’t think he could have nailed her harder if he was swinging that thing! The camera shot was JUST GORGEOUS as Kash wasn’t even in the frame…just a flying chair NAILING her! Kash talks trash to the crowd as the replay shows just how vicious that chairshot was. Kash picks Trinity up and chops her across the top of her chest with ALL of the spirit of Chris Benoit! Another one! DAMN, he’s beating the shit out of this girl! Kash earns the first significant “Asshole” chant in TNA from this beating as he just knee lifts her unmercifully. He throws her back into the ring and hits his cool top rope clothesline. He goes for the cover, but Kash pulls her up at two as the announcers are appalled at Kash’s behavior. Trinity tries to fight back, but he nails a Siakalypse like swinging neckbreaker and hangs on to combo it into the BANKROLL~! ONE…TWO…he lifts her up again! Tenay is LIVID at the announce table! “Trinity” chant by the crowd as Kash drives his shoulder into her midsection in the corner. A “Fuck you Kid” chant breaks out and I can’t believe this! Kash misses a charge in the corner and Trinity comes back with a somersault off the top for two. Kash gets up quickly and clotheslines her HARD! He goes for the cover…and this time, she kicks out legit to a pop! Kash gets in the refs face and goes back to Trinity. He picks her up and gets IN HER FACE, yelling at her as he pulls her by the hair. He whips her into the ropes and she gets a ‘rana out of nowhere! They blow some spot, but Trinity covers by pounding Kash’s back a few times. She goes to the top and comes off with a blown rana attempt and the ref is knocked down by it. All of a sudden, Mike Sanders and the Harris Brothers come into the ring and H-bomb Kid Kash to a pop! They put Trinity on top….ONE…TWO…THREE!


Winner: Trinity


My Opinion: Oh…My…God. This has to be seen to be believed. For months now, I’ve been ragging on Kid Kash for almost everything. His in ring work, his promos, everything. Tonight, I’m doing a total 180. This was possibly one of the most intense segments in TNA history. Kid Kash turned into a total heel tonight and I’ve NEVER seen a man beat the hell out of a woman like this is a one on one match. That’s why they’re never any good. Too many male wrestlers out there pull their punches. I’m not saying that I’m an advocate for man on woman violence in wrestling, but this match was 100% believable and had more heat than most TNA title matches. Trinity’s comebacks were timed perfectly and although a few spots were blown at the end, it didn’t detract from the atmosphere at all, like most blown spots do. Kash didn’t use a ton of insane impact spots…and no Indy Applause Stance either! This is most likely the best male vs. female match that I’ve ever seen and Kash has got a TON of heat now. Think about it…the Nashville fans were not only into this match, but they cheered the Harris Brothers of all people. Although the Triple X vs. AMW match was a better match in the ring, which is what I grade on, this was probably the highlight of my night so far. I am definitely curious as to why Sanders and Harris H-bombed Kash as well. The only thing I can think of is that they want to recruit her into S.E.X. I’d like to say that I’d like to see a rematch with these two, but I’m afraid that TNA would actually put the X-Title on her. **1/4


Goldylocks is in the back in front of a dressing room and Father James Mitchell is arguing with Slash about something. Slash says that he’s going to the ring NOW, despite his wishes and walks out. Then, TNA make a WCW like production error as they keep the camera on Goldy and Mitchell too long…and Vince Russo appears from behind Mitchell in the cameras view and turns around quickly.


We now go to Jeremy Borash in the ring as Shark Boy makes his way down the aisle for a match. Slash appears from behind and reverse DDT’s him on the mat! Slash has a weird knife that looks like it came out of one of the short stories in Stephen King’s Cats Eye. He gets into the ring and puts the knife to Borash’s throat! Slash calls out Justin Credible…but Credible comes from behind and nails him with a cane. The bell rings and we’ve got a match!


Justin Credible vs. Slash


Match Background: Just the end of the Ultimate Sin match from earlier tonight.


The Match: Credible hits a cane assisted Side Russian Legsweep to start the match and chops him in the corner. Slash reverses an irish whip and Credible does the Flair Flip in the corner. Slash knocks him down to the floor and then flies over the top with a somersault before they start brawling at the top of the ramp. Slash is still bleeding from the Ultimate Sin match by the way. They make their way back to ringside…where Credible bumps off a phantom clothesline! Slash charges at Justin and gets powerslammed on the floor before continuing to brawl at ringside. Credible positions Slash in front of the ring post and dropkicks him into it. A second attempt is caught and he’s catapulted into the pole. Slash nails him with a chair before throwing him back into the ring. He goes for the Slash and Burn, but Credible low blows him. He goes for That’s Incredible, but Slash counters and goes into the whirly bird for two. Slash jumps off the top, but Credible superkicks him on the way down. Credible gets his cane and nails him in the head twice. He isn’t DQed for some reason though…and neither is Slash as he throws powder in Credible’s eyes in full view of the referee. He then takes the cane and nails Credible with it a few times, breaking it. They brawl into the crowd some more until they make their way to the parking lot. All of a sudden, Saturn and New Jack come running in, but Slash nails them with the cane! Sandman comes running with a FLAMING cane and actually nails Slash with it dead on! The Disciples start brawling with Team Extreme until security is able to break them up. Sandman gets his flaming cane and starts running around with it like a madman until it goes out…


Winner: No Contest I assume.


My Opinion: It wasn’t made clear if the match was a regular match or not, the match ended in a no contest, not much happened. That’s pretty much it. The flaming cane was cool though. ¾*


Eric Watts comes to the ring with a straightjacket in his hands and demands THE STICK~! He calls out Raven, saying that he just wants to talk. Julio comes into the ring instead, twitching and ready to fight…and Watts tells him that he’s not Raven, so he’s not interested in talking to him. He ends up dubbing him “The Chickenator” for some reason, since “Julio” isn’t gothic enough and mocks Raven’s Nest. Eric turns his back on him and Julio charges, but Watts turns around and nails him with a pair of clotheslines! Watts chokeslams Julio as West and Tenay argue about where Watts‘ allegiance lie. Julio gets a spin kick on Watts, but Eric comes back with a powerbomb into the turnbuckle, which Tenay calls the E-Bomb. Alexis comes into the ring and nails him with a low blow as The Gathering take over on him. As Laree puts the boots to Watts, Julio puts a table into the ring. Jeff Jarrett comes into the ring…and makes the save! Evenflow DDT on Alexis by Jarrett! The Stroke on Julio! He sets the table up and puts him on it. Alexis tries to stop Jarrett from coming off the top….and gets powerbombed onto Julio through the table! Jarrett leaves thought the parking lot as he is also looking for Raven. That was fairly interesting…


We go to a video package recapping Lynn & Red defeating Triple X two weeks in a row to earn and eventually win the tag titles. The graphic actually reads “The X Division Dream Team” when they talk about Lynn & Red and I just can’t but into that hyperbole. “Lynn/Red: A Matter of Respect.”


Konnan comes to ringside to do color commentary for the following match…


The Amazing Red vs. Jerry Lynn for the #1 Contendership to the X Division Title


Match Background: As the aforementioned video package put forth, Lynn & Red have been partners for the past two weeks, earning the right to face each other in this match two weeks ago in a 4 team match and then winning the tag titles together last week. They’ve faced each other once in TNA before in singles competition with Lynn coming out on top, defending his then X Division Championship.


The Match: West and Tenay point out that both men are still hurting from the beating they took earlier in the show at the hands of Triple X, Sonny Siaki and David Young. Konnan picks Amazing Red “because he’s Puerto Rican, although he doesn’t act like it.” Tenay questions his response and he says that Red doesn’t use his real name to wrestle because he’s ashamed of it. Tenay asks him about the masked luchador and Konnan says that he still doesn’t know who it is. Lynn and Red lock up to start with neither man getting any advantage. Konnan says that he doesn’t he doesn’t respect Lynn because he said he’d wrestle luchadores, but none have come. He then complains about women having matches on TNA while he can’t get one. They counter each other and Red misses the Red Star Press before stopping for an Indy Applause Stance. They continue to reverse and counter each other and finish by attempting dropkicks at the same time for the second pause in the action. They shake hands in the ring before locking up again and hopefully finally getting into some real action. Konnan on women in TNA: “Some bitch gets in my face, I’ll tell you what, I’d tear into her so viciously, you’d be cleaning up the stench of fish for two weeks.” Red goes for a weird tilt a whirl, but its turned into a tilt a whirl backbreaker by Lynn. “Let’s Go Red” chant by the crowd as he’s the obvious favorite tonight. Lynn puts on a single leg crab but Red is able to get to the ropes as the chant gets louder. Lynn charges but gets tripped onto the ropes, leading up to a 718 attempt by Red as Tenay makes no bones about where he got the move from. Red goes for Code Red, but Lynn counters that until Red get a dropkick, sending Lynn to the outside. Red jumps onto the apron and ranas Lynn down. Konnan: “A Huracanrana invented by Hurancan Ramirez down in the ‘30’s in Mexico.” There’s the one thing I learned today. Tenay tries to counter Konnan by saying that Red has perfected it. I’d say that Rey perfected it, not Red. He gets a second rana on the outside and they go back into the ring. Liu Kang bicycle kick on Lynn is followed up by a spinning wheel kick for two. Konnan and Tenay state that Lynn and Red know each other because they’re tag partners….although they’ve only tagged twice. They then prove that point when Red ducks out of the apron legdrop that Lynn loves to utilize. Red then goes for a baseball slide, but Lynn catches him and drops him throat first onto the guard rail. Lynn sends him back into the ring and sends him into the ropes with Lynn charging after him. Red goes for Lynn’s roll up out of the corner, which is blocked, but Code Red is not for two. Red comes off the top with a rana attempt, but Lynn powerbombs him down. Konnan asks Tenay and West who they pick and they say Lynn and Red respectively. Lynn goes for a TKO, but Red inside cradles him for two. Red goes for the Cradle Piledriver, but Lynn counters it with a Kryptonite Krunch for a close two. Jerry then attempts a Cradle Piledriver, but Red flips out and spin kicks him down. He goes to the top and gets pulled down by Lynn with Red nailing the ref on the way down! Red then charges at Lynn in the corner, but Lynn moves out of the way and Red goes into the ring post shoulder first! Ron “The Truth” Killings makes his first TNA appearance in a few weeks as he comes in and hits the True Conviction on Lynn! Konnan says that Truth is another example of someone who isn’t being used right. Truth makes his way to the announce table and tells Konnan they have to talk…NOW. Konnan leaves with him as Red hits the Infra Red in the ring for the ONE…TWO…THREE. They get up and shake hands…


Winner: Red


My Opinion: I’ve got to say that I’m very disappointed in this match. Their first encounter was a hell of a lot better. It seemed as if these guys were going in slow motion for most of the match. There were barely any near falls and there weren’t even many spots in this match at all. The only reason I can assume that the performance was what it was tonight is because they were trying to sell the beatdown from earlier. The interference in the match is interesting and I hope Truth will be able to get some promo time to explain his actions. Looks like it’ll be Red vs. Kash and most likely, Red will come out on top. *1/2


In the back, Goldylocks is with Eric Watts who is still looking for Raven. He says that Jarrett helping him out was monumental and awesome before barging into a room where Raven is. Raven attacks Watts immediately as he opens the door and Evenflows him into a chair!


The announcers hype Jarrett vs. Raven for NEXT WEEK. They put over the fact that Raven chose the date, which was never stated until now.


We get the awesome Raven/Jarrett video package for the third week in a row….but I really don’t mind it. As a matter of fact, the end of it is different as newer footage is appended on with techno music playing in the background. The package actually includes the phrase “The Most Anticipated Match in TNA History” and I’ve got to agree with them. Who knows if it’ll be as good as Jarrett vs. Truth or Jarrett vs. Styles though.


Jarrett heads to the back where Raven was with Watts just minutes ago, but upon entering the room, Raven attacks him with a mop. No, it’s not Moppy. He brings the straight jacket with him as well as Jarrett and Raven brawl towards the ring! Jarrett gets the advantage with a chair before they go into the ring and nails him with it! He puts the straight jacket on Raven and hits him with a chair a few times…but then the lights go out! When they come back on…Perry Saturn, Sandman, New Jack and Justin Credible are standing behind Jarrett in the ring! Raven is laughing…and tells Jarrett to turn around! He goes after them with the chair, but Raven grabs Jarrett and Evenflows him! Saturn, New Jack and Credible put the straight jacket on Jarrett while Sandman looks on in the corner. They then wrap him in barbed wire and hang him upside down! Raven takes the cane from Sandman and just waffles on Jarrett! Team Extreme and Raven celebrate to end the show!!!


My Two Cents: As shocking as this angle might be, I have issues with it. First off, Raven and Sandman are eternal enemies and shouldn’t be on the same side over something like this. Then again, Sandman was standing in the background while most of this was going on. The main issue that I have with this is that now Raven has an overwhelming advantage in the match against Jarrett. The match was building just fine the way it was as The Gathering weren’t ever seen a large enough threat. What worries me about this is that it is setting up the Raven/Jarrett title match as Jarrett being the underdog. Jarrett has held that title too long and it doesn’t put over Raven much, if at all, if he wins it with massive interference. Jarrett retaining now becomes a scary possibility. I’ll admit…I’m looking forward to next week, I really am, but I was more excited when Raven didn’t have the ECW army behind him.


Well….I finally got this one done. This computer seems to treat me a hell of a lot better too. I’ll also be recapping WWE Backlash and it’ll be up on TheSmartMarks.com so stay tuned. I know most of you won’t watch it…and that’s what I’m for.


‘Til next time,


The Dames, Damian Gonzalez


Any questions, comments, hate mail, fan mail, anything, whatever….please…send it all to [email protected].


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