Guest Boo_Bradley Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 I've been having a multitude of urinary problems in the past few months. I read up on it and figured I had an enlarged prostate... so I went to see a urologist today....and I am scarred! It started innocently enough, as I merely had to pee in a cup and have it tested, then it got worse... 1st the doctor dropped my drawers and fondled my testicles and penis... then had a nurse come in and rub gel all over my crotch and stomach so that I could have a bladder ultrasound done...for someone as shy as I am it was pretty rough have this young girl rubbing her fingers through my pubic hairs... after that test was over, the real pain started... the doctor had me lay back and yet another nurse came in and together they put a CLAMP on my penis... the nurse then took a needle and injected a numbing liquid down my uretha.... I joked to her that "I thought men were supposed to inject liquids into woman's privates, not the other way around"... so after that I was left alone for 15 mins with my penis being internally numbed and a CLAMP still on my "special lil' guy"...I endured a burning sensation, and then I got that twitchy feeling down there, and it I briefly feared I was going to have a unvoluntary orgasm right then and there....thankfully the moment passed... The doctor reentered the room, this time with a LONG hose with a bag of water attached...he proceied to stick the tube down my shaft into my bladder and manually filled it with water... I was gaining the sensation of having to go to the bathroom from this, and I was worried my body would try sending liquid out while the Doc was spraying it in and my member would explode.... no such luck... after that the nurse noted "You did real well, we have alot of guys SCREAM from pain".... well he pulled out, and then I had to stand over this toliet/buzzing electronic device and urinate yet again to test my "stream strength".... Well quite frankly it felt like I was pissing razor blades!... the doctor diagnosed me, and then sent me on my way.... I had to go #1 4 times in ten minutes before I left the hospital, each time the razor feeling remained... then once i got in my car, I only drove 5 mins before pulling over and going AGAIN... the frequency last for a few hours, and the razor blades will remain for a few days as well.... So how was YOUR day?
Guest The Upright Man Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 If you were cool like me, you would have jizzed in her face. The ladies love that kind of thing.
Guest cue_meanie Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 I feel your pain man! Well actually I don't and I'm real glad about that. But seriously that shit is PAINFUL and embarassing...good work...hope everything works out for you
Guest Spicy McHaggis Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 If you were cool like me, you would have jizzed in her face. The ladies love that kind of thing. Honestly, that's one of the few situations you could get away with it. You didn't know some young nurse was gonna rub you up with gel. It was barely noticable, but there was some feeling in her rubbing, wasn't there?
The Dames Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 Good lord. I went through a similar pain once...but yours was MUCH worse. That just sounded unbearable. Dames
Guest Nightscrawler Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 I think I'm going to be sick....
Guest Plushy Al Logan Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 I don't think anyone, except for John Wayne Bobbit can top this.
The Dames Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 What about the guy that cut off his penis, cooked it and ate it because he was on some FUCKED UP pills? That happened just a couple of days ago too, check out the CE folder for more details. Dames
Guest Plushy Al Logan Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 What about the guy that cut off his penis, cooked it and ate it because he was on some FUCKED UP pills? That happened just a couple of days ago too, check out the CE folder for more details. Dames I just got back from there, that story creeped me out.
Guest Retro Rob Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 What about the guy that cut off his penis, cooked it and ate it because he was on some FUCKED UP pills? That happened just a couple of days ago too, check out the CE folder for more details. Dames See as Dames attempts to populate the CE Folder...
Guest Spicy McHaggis Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 Good lord. I went through a similar pain once...but yours was MUCH worse. That just sounded unbearable. Dames Seriously. I went through the pleasure of a catheter removal after surgery...
Guest Bosstones Fan Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 Oh, good lord. I wander into this thread thinking that there's gonna be a nice little story of something odd/hilarious happening to Boo at the doctor's office...and then I read THIS. My lunch break has been officially ruined. I'm sorry you had to go through that man, but I can say without a doubt that I'm glad I don't feel your pain.
The Dames Posted July 15, 2003 Report Posted July 15, 2003 What about the guy that cut off his penis, cooked it and ate it because he was on some FUCKED UP pills? That happened just a couple of days ago too, check out the CE folder for more details. Dames See as Dames attempts to populate the CE Folder... No...just the thread. I'm sure Marney and Tyler would scare off any newcomers anyway. Dames
Guest Red Hot Thumbtack In The Eye Posted July 16, 2003 Report Posted July 16, 2003 I probably didn't experience as much sheer penile agony in my story but when I ruptured my kidney I had a J Stint implanted into my kidney through my penis. At the end of about 10 days with this in the time came that I could pull it out(the doctor could have done it but I wanted the pleasure for myself). So I pull this thing, and pull, and pull, and pull about 1.5 feet of string until revealing a piece of plastic. This shit is really starting to hurt and I soon found out why. This stiff plastic piece started to curl like a pigs tail. Well I pulled it out(with very little flex I might add) and promptly cussed loudly enough for many people to hear. So anyhow, it was fun all in all. Especially when 2 days after leaving the hospital a story broke around here alleging hospitals had been re-using catheters on multiple patients....good times.
Guest HBK16 Posted July 16, 2003 Report Posted July 16, 2003 Oh man that had to suck. I had a tube in my penis when I had alcohol poisoning but mine wasnt as bad as yours. Although I was shocked to feel down there and find a tube.
Guest Choken One Posted July 16, 2003 Report Posted July 16, 2003 I've woken with the Tube in my Buddy once and just like everyone... WHY THE HELL DO WE INSTINCTVELY REACH FOR OUR COCK when we wake up from surgery. I mean If i had a Heart Transplant and woke up...I'd grab my junk first before seeing if I had a new heart.
Guest CaptRiker Posted July 16, 2003 Report Posted July 16, 2003 WHY THE HELL DO WE INSTINCTVELY REACH FOR OUR COCK when we wake up from surgery. In times of crisis, you gotta have something to hold onto...
Guest HBK16 Posted July 16, 2003 Report Posted July 16, 2003 Thats what I did. Dont know why. Maybe cuz I felt an itch. But thats the first thing I went for when I woke up. Felt around and thought I had gotten bigger. But when I actually knew what it was I almost passed out.
Guest Spaceman Spiff Posted July 16, 2003 Report Posted July 16, 2003 To make sure it's still there? There's a bunch of people working w/ sharp cutting utensils, so you gotta make sure they didn't "slip" and remove something they weren't supposed to.
Guest HBK16 Posted July 16, 2003 Report Posted July 16, 2003 To make sure it's still there? There's a bunch of people working w/ sharp cutting utensils, so you gotta make sure they didn't "slip" and remove something they weren't supposed to. Heh. Funny thats what I tell people when I was telling them the story. I told them that that was the first thing I went for when I woke up and they asked why and joking around I told them that they could have slipped and cut it off.
Guest Choken One Posted July 16, 2003 Report Posted July 16, 2003 The scary thing the surgery I got that time was a Tumor in my Throat...so Why would I reach for my cock? Amazing. Do Chicks grab their tits right away?
Guest Spicy McHaggis Posted July 16, 2003 Report Posted July 16, 2003 Oh man that had to suck. I had a tube in my penis when I had alcohol poisoning but mine wasnt as bad as yours. Although I was shocked to feel down there and find a tube. Yeah. My catheter was just the last straw. I had a spinal fusion and woke up with a respirator tube down my throat, a tube up my nose reaching to my stomach to suck out the acid, and the catheter in my dick. Thank God for the intravenous morphine.
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