You know you are in California when...

[Guest SweetNSexyDiva]

You know you're in California when......

 

1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.

 

2. You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.

 

3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a

conversation in English.

 

4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and

is named Breeze.

 

5. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

 

6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm

donor.

 

7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are

grown and can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

 

8. You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.

 

9. You can't remember.....is pot illegal?

 

10. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

 

11. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.

 

12. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

 

13. A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless

chaps. You don't even notice.

 

14. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing the

baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney IS George Clooney.

 

15. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

 

16. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who

delivers your mail is into S &M, and your Mary Kay rep is a guy in

drag.

 

17. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

 

18. It's barely sprinkling rain and there'! s a repo rt on every news

station about "STORM WATCH 2003."

 

19. You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy

Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00 PM Tae Bo class.

 

20. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cell phones or pagers.

 

21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an

hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

 

22. Hey!!!! Is Pot Illegal????

 

23. Both you AND your dog have therapists

 

Dumb, I know, but I was amused. And, as you may have guessed, I live in CA, so I thought it wold be fun to post this.

[Guest Plushy Al Logan]

3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a

conversation in English.

 

That's for damn sure.

 

11. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.

 

Yes.

 

18. It's barely sprinkling rain and there'! s a repo rt on every news

station about "STORM WATCH 2003."

 

Yes, we are pussies.

[Murmuring Beast 0]

I wish they all could be Californian girls..

[Guest Texas Small Arms 09]

Well seeing as how I too was a California girl back in the day I can say those are true. Hell I remember going to a resturant a few years back in LA with friends and we saw a party for a a "man" that just had a sex change. Or I think LA is one of only a few places where you can walk off the airplane and see 2 billboards side by side that reads "Come visit Jesus in Church" and then "LIVE XXX GIRLS!"

[Guest Bosstones Fan]

Or I think LA is one of only a few places where you can walk off the airplane and see 2 billboards side by side that reads "Come visit Jesus in Church" and then "LIVE XXX GIRLS!"

I-45 here is the same way; I can't count the number of XXX ads (or the huge, flashing signs for the strip clubs) there are dotting the highways in Houston.

[Guest Eagan469]

You know you are in California when...

 

...the ski-lift is closed because of a forest fire

[Guest Texas Small Arms 09]

Or I think LA is one of only a few places where you can walk off the airplane and see 2 billboards side by side that reads "Come visit Jesus in Church" and then "LIVE XXX GIRLS!"

I-45 here is the same way; I can't count the number of XXX ads (or the huge, flashing signs for the strip clubs) there are dotting the highways in Houston.

That is true. St. James(right?) and The Gold Cup to name a few. Lots of porno shop ads too.

[Guest SweetNSexyDiva]

2. You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.

Seriously.... New houses in San Diego, CA start at $350,000! For a two bedroom at that!

 

10. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

Yes, the eternal quest for a parking space in Downtown San Diego when you are late for work and don't have $8 cash to pay at the lots or change to pay for the meter that you can only park at for 2 hours max before you either move your car or get a ticket. Free parking really can make you cry! I know it has brought me to tears after driving around for half an hour!

 

12. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

No SHEEEIIITTT! I think the record high here this year was about $2.75 a gallon!!!

 

19. You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy

Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00 PM Tae Bo class.

Sigh.... I used to have to schedule meetings around my my boss's son's football games and hockey games. It is really fun trying to explain to a Congressman about your boss's "busy" schedule.

 

21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an

hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

Have you ever driven in the rain in CA? NO ONE here can drive in the rain!! It takes me an hour longer to get to work in the morning (well, it did when I had a job) when it rains because there are about 10 accidents before 7 am.

 

22. Hey!!!! Is Pot Illegal????

Sigh, the govt. here can't decide.....

[Guest CED Ordonez]

21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an

hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

Have you ever driven in the rain in CA?  NO ONE here can drive in the rain!!  It takes me an hour longer to get to work in the morning (well, it did when I had a job) when it rains because there are about 10 accidents before 7 am.

So sadly true. Some people just can't grasp the concept that vehicles do, in fact, handle differently in dry and wet conditions. The most annoying individual is the one that still has to weave in and out of traffic despite the rainfall (without signaling AND using a cell phone...DAMMIT, such pet peeves of mine). One hard brake later...you know the rest.

[Guest welshjerichomark]

Most of them could be applied to London as well.

[Internet Warfare 0]

Those were very hurtful.

 

 

but funny!

[Guest evenflowDDT]

This list is HELLA stupid

[Guest phoenixrising]

21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an

hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

Have you ever driven in the rain in CA?  NO ONE here can drive in the rain!!  It takes me an hour longer to get to work in the morning (well, it did when I had a job) when it rains because there are about 10 accidents before 7 am.

So sadly true. Some people just can't grasp the concept that vehicles do, in fact, handle differently in dry and wet conditions. The most annoying individual is the one that still has to weave in and out of traffic despite the rainfall (without signaling AND using a cell phone...DAMMIT, such pet peeves of mine). One hard brake later...you know the rest.

Cars have signals? Oh yeah, that's right I just remembered I live in California. Then again I shouldn't be complaining as I tend to pull the "California Stop" routine too often. You know - approach stop, roll slowly forward, stop for half a second and then go.

 

Good list, and all of the stuff on there is so true.

[Guest NoCalMike]

Funny Stuff. People are fucking wimps and sissies out here when it comes to weather. I didn't live in the east coast that much of my life, but something must have stuck with me, because I probably feel cold maybe a total of 5 days from California Winters. The dry heat in the summer does kill ya though.

[Guest phoenixrising]

Funny Stuff. People are fucking wimps and sissies out here when it comes to weather. I didn't live in the east coast that much of my life, but something must have stuck with me, because I probably feel cold maybe a total of 5 days from California Winters. The dry heat in the summer does kill ya though.

I like the dry heat.

 

I hate when it's hot and humid, cause you can't get away from the humidity and your clothes feel like they're sticking to you.

[Guest SweetNSexyDiva]

This list is HELLA stupid

Well, I don't know where you live, but in San Diego parts of the list are pretty accurate.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

If nothing else, most folks in the midwest can drive in any weather conditions. Nothing like charging up an icy hill in the middle of january, and you start sliding to the side of the road..

[Guest MaxPower27]

21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an

hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

Have you ever driven in the rain in CA?  NO ONE here can drive in the rain!!  It takes me an hour longer to get to work in the morning (well, it did when I had a job) when it rains because there are about 10 accidents before 7 am.

So sadly true. Some people just can't grasp the concept that vehicles do, in fact, handle differently in dry and wet conditions. The most annoying individual is the one that still has to weave in and out of traffic despite the rainfall (without signaling AND using a cell phone...DAMMIT, such pet peeves of mine). One hard brake later...you know the rest.

Cars have signals? Oh yeah, that's right I just remembered I live in California. Then again I shouldn't be complaining as I tend to pull the "California Stop" routine too often. You know - approach stop, roll slowly forward, stop for half a second and then go.

Up north, we called that the "Rhode Island Slide"