Terrorize your telemarketer!

[Guest SweetNSexyDiva]

Have some fun with your telemarketer!

[Guest Billy Stark]

"!you hear Can't. up breaking, VROOOOM!"

[TheFranchise 0]

either! you hear cant I coincidence, a that's Wow,

[Papacita 0]

4. After the telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.

Cute.

 

I just cuss at them in a Jamaican accent. Works well enough for me.

[Guest wwF1587]

ya know i told one of them when they asked "is so and os here" i didnt tell them it was me, instead i said "no hes dead!' then i hung up and have only heard from them once since and that was a few months ago..

[Red Baron 0]

i've heard some of these before, I know there is a list of like 30 of these. Some of them overlap though

[Sandman9000 0]

I break out my death metal growl, that usually works. The threatening to skullfuck them part is the kicker.

 

In the rare event that fails, I sing the end of "Cemetary Gates." No one can survive my rendition of that.

[Guest EQ]

I hear hanging up on them really pisses them off

[Guest The Old Me]

I heard one somewhere else and used it. I pretended I was taking a shit while I talked with them.

 

them:so would you be interested?

me:(grunting and squeezing) honey, do we have anymore toilet paper?

[Guest BDC]

I went through a phase of asking for things in weird colors. I asked for a credit card in a chartruce/fucia mix, then pitched a fit over it.

 

Either that or be really picky over details like you have OCD. Thank you, Kevin Nealon.

[Anakin Flair 0]

Or....

Just check the caller ID. Unk Name= Telemarketer.

 

Or, let the machine pick it up. If they want to talk to you, they'll leave a message.

[Guest EQ]

I hate when people (friends/family) don't leave messages on the machine and then complain when you weren't around

[Tawren 0]

I just tell them to hold on, then go watch TV as they wait for me to grab a pen.

[Guest Choken One]

I just Burp and Hang Up...Or Make Orgasm sounds...sometimes I belt out "HIGHER" by Creed...

 

CAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNN YOOOOOOU TAAAKE

MMEEEEEEEEEEEEE HIIIIIIIIIIGGHEEEEEER!

[godthedog 0]

why can't you be the people i call? i get the most boring, mundane rejections.

[Stephen Joseph 0]

yeah, seriously, i did this too

 

i feel the pain godthedog

 

why cant you people have fun with us. We're getting paid, we dont care!

[Guest The Old Me]

Once or twice I have just pretended to be a chineese man, talking in a heavy accent that no telemarketer wants to hear.