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Terrorize your telemarketer!


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Posted
4. After the telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.

Cute.

 

I just cuss at them in a Jamaican accent. Works well enough for me.

Posted

ya know i told one of them when they asked "is so and os here" i didnt tell them it was me, instead i said "no hes dead!' then i hung up and have only heard from them once since and that was a few months ago..

Posted

I break out my death metal growl, that usually works. The threatening to skullfuck them part is the kicker.

 

In the rare event that fails, I sing the end of "Cemetary Gates." No one can survive my rendition of that.

Guest The Old Me
Posted

I heard one somewhere else and used it. I pretended I was taking a shit while I talked with them.

 

them:so would you be interested?

me:(grunting and squeezing) honey, do we have anymore toilet paper?

Posted

I went through a phase of asking for things in weird colors. I asked for a credit card in a chartruce/fucia mix, then pitched a fit over it.

 

Either that or be really picky over details like you have OCD. Thank you, Kevin Nealon.

Posted

I hate when people (friends/family) don't leave messages on the machine and then complain when you weren't around

Guest Choken One
Posted

I just Burp and Hang Up...Or Make Orgasm sounds...sometimes I belt out "HIGHER" by Creed...

 

CAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNN YOOOOOOU TAAAKE

MMEEEEEEEEEEEEE HIIIIIIIIIIGGHEEEEEER!

Guest The Old Me
Posted

Once or twice I have just pretended to be a chineese man, talking in a heavy accent that no telemarketer wants to hear.

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