Promo

[Guest Perfect_Bo]

First, I will like to say that if I got any of the characters wrong, just tell me and shoot me.  Second is that I used the carnies in this promo without asking, but, I didnt kill anybody and I really hope I didnt fuck up any storyline advancement.  This is my second promo and I really hope it's good

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“Cause we are living, in a material world, and I am a material girl, cause you know we are living, in a material world, and I am a material girl.”

 

The song from a guy’s voice is heard all over the hallways.  The camera tries to follow where the voice is coming from and the camera ends up right in front of the Carnival’s locker room.  The camera catches a hand pushing the door open, the hand of the camera guy “Gus”.  The door is slightly pushed open and you can see ELM, with a brush in his hand, singing…  Mark and Edwin are just looking at him with a dumbfounded look on their faces.

 

“You know, I can see this many times, but I doubt that I would ever get tired of it.” Edwin said to Mark as they both stare at ELM, smiling, wanting to laugh.

 

“You know, I may not be in a good mood at this moment, but this certainly cheers me up.”  Mark responded back to Edwin…  “Sing Elm Sing…”

 

Behind the door, the cameraman still stands…  He wants to laugh as well but tries to contain himself since he doesn’t want to get caught.  Although that smile faded away as he senses someone behind him.  He slowly begins to turn around when a voice emerges from behind, this voice said:  “C’mon man, you have to move faster than that.”

 

The voice, a familiar voice although gone for a while struck into the earlobes of Gus.  Gus the cameraman turns around quicker and sees none other than Bo stand right in front of him.  Bo has a big smile on his face, more of a taunting smile as the thug from NY finally broke his silence by saying:  “What is your name?”

 

“Err, Gus.”  The cameraman said, scare off his ass.

 

“Gus?  What the hell kind of name is Gus?” Bo reply, staring at the much smaller man with the camera.

 

“Not sure sir, my parents name me that.”

 

“Ok, Gus…  Honestly, were your parents on crack when they named you?  Were you an accident that was born in a supermarket?  Were you deprived of many sexual activities due to that name?  Gus, please explain that to me.” Bo asked him, with a serious look on his face.  

 

“Um, not that I know of sir.” Gus answered, practically shitting on himself.

 

A sly smile forms in the face of Bo as he stares down at the nervous man that calls himself Gus.  “Gus, one more question, ok?”

 

“What ever you want sir.”

 

“I know…  Are you afraid of me?”

“Err, yes sir.”

 

“You shouldn’t be, I’m harmless.”

 

“I’ll be in whatever mood you want me to be sir.” Gus answered, not knowing what to expect from this man that came back lurking for revenge.

 

“Hmmm, that’s interesting…  If I were to tell you to piss on yourself right now, would you do it?”

 

“I would try.”

 

A really large smile structured in the face of Bo as he said:  “I want you to piss on yourself.”

 

“Sir?”

 

“No, I want you to piss on yourself, NOW!”

 

“Um, yes sir…  I will try.”

 

“I don’t want you to try, I want you to succeed, make me proud and piss on yourself dammit.”

 

A tear forms from the eye of Gus as he puts the camera down to do what Bo ask him to do.  He takes a deep breath and pushes, but nothing is coming out.  He takes another deep breath and once again he push, but just like last time, the result is the same and nothing came out.

 

“Nothing is coming out sir, I’m trying and trying and nothing is coming out.” Gus tried to explain to Bo, but the thug aint hearing it and said:  “I aint hearing that shit, I WANT YOU TO PISS ON YOUR SELF NOW!!!”

 

Another deep breath and another push as Bo screams out:  “C’mon man, you can do it, don’t disappoint me, I know you can do it, do it damn it, do it…  Make me fuckin proud and piss on yourself.”

 

Gus is really pushing hard, holding his breath and all.  “I think it’s coming.”

 

“That’s what I want to fuckin hear, push harder, make it come out…  PUSH DAMMIT PUSH!”

 

“It’s coming.”

 

“YEAH…  PISS FOR ME DAMMIT!”

 

“It’s coming.”

 

“Yeah, keep going…  Don’t let me fuckin down.”

 

“I’m about to piss…”

 

“Yeah, that’s what I’m fuckin talking about…  Do it dammit, do it…” Bo continues to scream at the poor, scared Gus.

 

“Here it comes!!!”  

 

“Yeah…  Yeah…  YEAH!”

 

“Pssss” A liquid form comes streaming down the leg of Gus as Bo’s smile fades away and takes a step back and looks up and down at Gus who just stands there with a smile on his face.  “There, I pissed on my self.”

 

A silent moment fills the hallway as Bo stares at Gus with a disgusting look on his face and said:  “Son, you just fuckin piss on your self.”

 

“Yeah, you just told me…”

 

Bo interrupts by saying: “That’s fuckin disgusting man, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

 

Gus face turns red, his leg is warm, he’s embarrassed.  He’s really uncomfortable and he’s beginning to smell.  “But, but you just told me…”

 

Bo interrupts again and this time he said:  “You sicken, you fuckin know that, you sicken me…  I can’t believe you fuckin piss on your damn self and then smile about it like if it was cum.  What the fuck is wrong with you?”

 

Gus really don’t know where to put his face as he tries to explain to Bo that he was told to do what he did.  “But, but…”

 

“Don’t fuckin talk to me, just pick up that damn camera and do your job, without pissing on yourself.”

 

“But…”

 

“I don’t want to hear it, now pick up that damn camera…” Bo begins to walk towards the door of the Carnival and he hears the music of “R-E-S-P-E-C-T”.  Bo looks back and said this to Gus:  You’re pathetic, just pathetic.

 

A tear drops from the face of Gus, a tear of humiliation as he picks up the camera.  Bo looks at the door in front of him; the sign said “Midnight Carnival.”  He takes a deep breath and knocks on the door.

 

{-- Knock, Knock, Knock --}

 

A voice from the behind the door screams out:  “Come in.”  This voice is familiar to Bo’s ears, but different from all the other voices that Bo knows in the Carnival.  Bo slowly enters and the first one he sees is Johnny Rotten.  Was he there the whole time?  Oh well.  Rotten quickly stands up from the chair where he was sitting at, he was having some fun watching ELM make a fool out of himself.  

 

“What you want?”  Rotten loudly said which caught the attention of the other Carnival group.  They quickly turn and quickly went on guard just incase of an ambush.  ELM stops singing as he suddenly turned serious once he spotted Bo by the door and Gus with the camera.

 

“I just want to talk, that’s all.” Bo answered, not scare of a possibe attack from the Carnies, although that’s not their style.

 

“Why should we talk to you?  In a matter of fact, why should we listen to you?”  Mark jumped in, remembering all the arguments, the fights, and the beef that they both displayed towards each other in the past.

 

“Look, I don’t want any beef…  I just want to say something.”

 

The Carnies were surprised at Bo’s words, but still reluctant to believe him as they all walk towards each other to form a unity.  They all stand side by side, 8 pairs of eyes staring at the returning Bo.

 

“Talk.” The leader said.

 

“Look, I came back into this fed for my reason.  My reason is not to beef with ya; I have no beef with ya.  The only reason, the only single reason I’m here is for revenge.”

 

“Why should we believe you?”  Edwin asked for the rest of the team which they were all thinking the same thing.”

 

“Because I’m telling you the truth.”

 

“You attacked me when I was having a match with Edwin on Smarkdown, and now you want armistice?”  Edwin continue saying as the fearless leader he is.

 

“I didn’t attack you, I was just helping Sacred…  See, I need him and for that matter, I need the rest of “Da Pound,” I’m seeking revenge, and with them by my side, it will make my life easier.”  Bo explained to them as they still look at him with a face of distrust.

 

“Look Bo…  I know you pretty well, we were in the same stable back in the days of the JL and we’ve feuded numerous times.  I know how you are and what you stand for, how you think and how you react.  I personally don’t believe you.”  Mark entered the conversation with that statement.

 

Bo walks forward a little although still distant enough for him not to be attacked and if they pursue and onslaught, he can escape since he’s close to the door.  “How can you know me if I barely know my self?  I don’t expect you to believe me, I really don’t.  But this is just I asking you to go easy on me.  I do not plan to beef with you, I really don’t care what you do to anybody else, but you attacking me will make my seeking revenge harder.”

 

“Bullshit.”

 

Bo quickly turns his head towards Rotten and said:  “What did you say?”

 

Rotten takes a few steps forward, closer to Bo than anybody else and said:  “I said this is bullshit.  I know you almost as well as Mark knows you.  We’ve been tight before, shit I was there when you got into that car accident, I was with you from the stretcher to the hospital bed.  I was there consoling your wife…

 

“Don’t talk about my wife…  Take her out of your mind and your mouth.”  Bo interrupted, raising his voice.

 

“Whatever man, you know you don’t scare me.  I’m having a match with you on Storm, and to make things worst for me, Sacred is involved.”  

 

“It’s a triple threat man.”

 

“You think I’m going to believe that you and him aren’t going to team up on me?  You think I’m that fuckin dumb?  What the hell is wrong with you?”  

 

“You think I don’t have a history with Sacred.  I know he don’t trust me, I know that guy don’t even fuckin like me.”

 

“Same goes for everyone in this room.”  Rotten jumped in with that comment.

 

“Bueno, yo no tengo problema contigo pero, these are my friends and you have problems with them, you have problems with me.”  ELM finally said something.

 

“Mira ELM…  Mi problem no es contigo, no es con nadie aqui…

 

“Hey, hey, hey…  Talk English dammit, we’re in America and our first language is English, get that straight.”  Edwin quickly intervenes.

 

“Look Bo…  I personally don’t believe you, but say that I do…  Who is this person that you’re seeking revenge on?”  Mark asked which caught everybody’s attention.

 

“I can’t speak about that right now, but it will be revealed when the time is right.  Just let me say something and I’m out.  Ok?”

 

Edwin looks at his fellow Carnienites and they all shook their heads.  “Ok, go ahead.”

 

“My beef is not with you, when I came back to the fed, my beef hasn’t been with you.  You’re just in the way, and I ask you to please step away.  I don’t want you to get involved in my personal affairs.  I want to take care of this and I don’t want any problems with you.  But let it be known that if you do get in the way, I will not hesitate, not for a damn second to take you out…  Yes, we have our history, but that’s shit to me right now.  My only obligation right now is for revenge.”

 

“There’s a flip side to that coin…  Yes, you did come over here and you did ask us to not get in the way.  But, what if YOU get in the way of OUR affairs, and you have us on the corner.  I don’t care who’s with you Bo, I will take you out, mark my words for that.”  Edwin said that with an angry face, a concern face as well.

 

“Ok…  I feel you…  I’m going to leave now.”  Bo turns around and was about to leave when he bumps into Gus.  “Oh, by the way…  I think your pal here Gus needs a bathroom…” And with that being said Bo leaves the room.

 

The camera catches Bo’s back as he exits the room.  Gus then hears a voice from the back and swirls around, catching the Carnies mumbling something while not taking their eyes off of Bo.

 

“What do you think?  Should we believe him?”  Edwin asks to his Carnies troops.

 

“I don’t think we should, he’s done this type of thing before and he turned of us…  I don’t think we should believe him, but we should give him his space.”  Mark answered.

 

“Easier for you, you don’t have a match with him on Storm.”

 

“Don’t worry, we got your back if anything happens.”  Edwin said trying to console his new buddy.

 

“Ok, now that that’s finish…  Can I go back to singing?”  ELM said, wanting to bust his vocals.

 

“Yeah, I want to continue laughing at you.” Rotten said.

 

The Carnies all turned around and ELM went by the stereo.  He raises the volume up and R-E-S-P-E-C-T blast through the speakers as ELM grabs the brush and begins his singing.  The camera now fades away from ELM doing a high note…

 

End

[Guest Edwin MacPhisto]

KICK-ASS!

 

I have not laughed that hard in a while.  Poor, poor Gus.  God, that was great.  You nailed the characters pretty well, Bo, and I don't think you need to worry about it messing anything up.  I brand it with the Carnival seal of approval, which is really just a big marshmallow with a smiley face drawn on it.

 

Absolutely classic promo.  It's good to have you back.

[Guest El Luchadore Magnifico]

Damn, Bo uses Spanish better than I do. Excellente, senor, tu espanol es buenisimo.

 

Great promo, too.

[Guest chirs3]

I think Gus should become the new Ben Hardy...

 

Hilarious promo, Bo.

[Guest]

Wonderful promo Bo, I kept trying to figure out what my Carnie persona would be, and you've dubbed me the straight man.

 

I'll be wonderful pie in the face material for many moons, I'm sure!

[Guest Edwin MacPhisto]

Straight man, eh?  I was envisioning more along the lines of the guy who cracks some sardonic jokes and then beats the hell out of people with a chair while the laugh track roars, but pies are good too.  

 

::hits Rotten with a banana cream, destroying the dignity of Bo's thread::

 

So far you've got unanimous Carnie/ex-Carnie approval, Bo!  I think you did well with this one.

[Guest]

I have went through several ideas about my persona. I kept thinking there is no way I can top any of you, and I don't want to infringe on Mark's style.

 

Maybe I could change my charcter name to Quinn Harle (Harlequinn), talk only in confusing riddles that don't make sense, and wear a multiple coloured silk thing.

 

Actually, that's what I'm going to do! Well, that and the Shattered Dreams.

[Guest Thoth]

No, you should change your name to Serge, and never ever talk!

 

GO VIDEO GAME HUMOR!

 

And Bo... holy crap.  This is some of the best stuff you've ever done, IMO.  I'm really really afraid to face you now.

[Guest Perfect_Bo]

I'm glad that you all like my Promo, I did try my best in this one to start in a new slate, to start off fresh, and as of now, things look to be going well for me...

 

I've always wanted to know what "IMO" means..  can someone explain that to me please?

 

B "Feeling happy that people like my Promo" O

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

Just mean "In My Opinion" you silly thug.