Jackies Jargon! April 30th Edition!

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Yes, the guiltiest pleasure is BACK with another edition giving HER UNIQUE TAKE on what's what in the WWE. Here's the JJ Drinking Game.

 

For every "!" take a shot.

Take a drink for every time she points out the painfully obvious.

Take 2 shots for every time she gives a complement

 

Answering your e-mails

by Miss Jackie

April 30, 2004

 

I asked and you answered! I want to personally thank each and every fan for your interest and following to "Miss Jackie's Jargon." The response for my column was great. It was so difficult for me to pick and choose what to write about from all of your great questions and comments! So, I decided that I would take the most-asked questions and try to give you "the scoop" on those. However, before I do any of that, let's chat for a minute about the craziness of what's up with the new WWE Tag Team Champions!

Who would have ever thought that Charlie Haas would find a mate?! He is an outstanding guy and all, but let's face it, when you are talking about another member of the "fruity entourage" of Rico and Miss Jackie (that's right, Rico is fruity and, well, I have melons!), Charlie would be probably be one of the last WWE Superstars that you would imagine! Just take a look at his background: All-American athlete from Seton Hall University, former member of the Self-Proclaimed World's Greatest Tag Team with Shelton Benjamin and as straight as an arrow when it comes to almost everything. Now he's teaming up with Rico to become the new Tag Team Champs! It seems that Charlie may be handing over some of those awards that he has won past for a new pair of trunks -- even if it may not be on his own will! Let me tell you, though, I cannot be any more honored and excited to have Charlie -- or as Rico will only refer to him, Charles -- be by our side! I mean, just look what they have already accomplished together their first week, the WWE Tag Team Titles … now tell me that isn't a perfect match!

 

However, when it comes to keeping those boys together all the time, I have to stand in more so than not. I know that Charlie is a little hesitant of Rico's actions from time to time but hey, who isn't? As long as we just stick together as a team, things will be just peachy! I cannot be any more proud to be the manager of the "Odd Couple," After all, they certainly keep me on my toes! It's like being in an episode of "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" at times, but I am having a blast and learning so much from both of them! I'd like to take this opportunity to thank both Rico and Charlie for being a part of such a fun, yet very interesting, team! Keep up the great work, guys!

 

Speaking of interesting, let me touch on some of the e-mails that I received over the past few weeks! Like I said, I did get a ton a questions and comments, which is great -- keep 'em coming. I wish I could talk about everything but I'll just be able to get to a few. Now, I'd first like to comment on all of your e-mails on “RAW vs. SmackDown!” Let me first say that there really is no RAW vs. SmackDown! as far as for better or for worse. I won't lie, I really have a lot of great friends on the RAW side and developed some great relationships in the six months that I was over there; HOWEVER, switching over to SmackDown!, I will only have the opportunity to create that many more great friendships and relationships. As far as I see it, I, or anyone for that matter who got traded or switched brands, now have the best of both worlds -- getting to know the entire WWE family! Both shows are great and definitely have their fair share of excitement. Over on RAW, yes there is the Women's Title, unlike SmackDown! But being with Rico on SmackDown! will definitely bring a new "twist," we can say, to Thursday nights! I do one day hope to be battling it out for the Women's Title, and that is a main career goal of mine. As for now, however, I am as thrilled as can be to be a part of the SmackDown! family!

 

While we are on the subject of "family," I had a lot of questions pertaining to all the Tough Enoughs. First off, Tough Enough was one of the best experiences that I have had my entire life. Look at what it has presented me with -- the opportunity to live out a dream! Even though there were only three seasons, the show expanded the world of wrestling. However, it really could only scratch the surface of what it actually takes to be a wrestler. I have the utmost respect for each and every Superstar that I work with, no matter how they got into this business. I had a very fortunate way going through Tough Enough 2, and there were only six of us total who were able to have the same opportunity. However, if your dream is to become a professional wrestler or a professional plumber, I only have one piece of advice … never, ever give up. I had a lot of odds against me leading up to Tough Enough, through the show and afterwards, but if you were put on this earth for a reason, where there is a will, there is a way!

 

Be ambitious about your goals in life and I will attest that anything worth doing is going to be an uphill battle at times, but know that every hill does have a top and another side. Your goals in life are totally attainable, it's just how you approach them that makes the difference! Also, pertaining to overcoming obstacles, my knee is doing just fine! I had to make some adjustments after surgery and minor day-to-day changes, especially since I love to run! However, I had a choice to make to continue on or throw in the towel … my choice helped me to get to where I am today! I'd like to let everyone know, though, that injuries like mine are just a minor scrape compared to so many other unfortunate injuries that WWE Superstars attain. I thank the Lord every day for my health and only having it be my knee, not my neck like so many others. God bless them all for having the guts and the love for wrestling to give it their all to continue day in and day out!

To switch to a lighter note, I received a ton of e-mails regarding my apparel, or lack thereof I should say! No, it's not personally made and it's not flown in specifically from New York or L.A. I actually find my things, for the most part, right in my hometown of Cleveland, Ohio! I have a certain brand line of clothing that makes my snazzy outfits … I should be getting a deal on them since I am so often missing crucial parts - let's say, like the BUTT! I love being so "off the wall." It's so fun and I can have so much creativity with it! Now, if I can just get Charlie to see the light. After all, Rico has no problem shopping on his own!

 

I'd like to say thanks again to everyone who has written such sweet comments. It has truly made my day! Also, it is such an honor that many of you said that my column is "fun and comfortable" reading - that's just what I'm looking to do. After all, WWE is all about fun and entertainment! Until next time, I'll keep on flipping over the top rope for you guys; that is, unless I have a skirt on!

 

Love Always and All Ways,

Miss Jackie

 

***

[AndrewTS 0]

"Let me first say that there really is no RAW vs. SmackDown! as far as for better or for worse."

 

BWAHAHAHA!!!

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Ok, I counted 37 "!". God they should make this a televised skit.

[AndrewTS 0]

Ok, I counted 37 "!". God they should make this a televised skit.

Well, she's perky at least. Can't complain about that in a manager/T&A girl/bukkake target.

 

"However, if your dream is to become a professional wrestler or a professional plumber"

...who says you can't do both?!

 

"that's right, Rico is fruity and, well, I have melons!), "

 

LOL2004!!!!~~~~~

 

Some one needs to tell her that slang and certain other expressions really do not require quotation marks.

 

"I do one day hope to be battling it out for the Women's Title, and that is a main career goal of mine."

 

So, they'll probably let her do that when...she's at least as good as Lita?

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

This is my favourite paragraph (minor adjustments made):

 

Be ambitious about your goals in life and I will attest that anything worth doing is going to be an uphill battle at times, but know that every hill does have a top and another side. Your goals in life are totally attainable, it's just how you approach them that makes the difference! Also, pertaining to overcoming obstacles, my knees are doing just fine! I had to make some adjustments after surgery and minor day-to-day changes, especially since I love bukkake! However, I had a choice to make to continue on or throw in the towel … my choice helped me to get to where I am today! I'd like to let everyone know, though, that injuries like mine are just a minor scrape compared to so many other unfortunate injuries that WWE Superstars attain. I thank the Lord every day for my health and only having it be my knee, not my neck like so many others. God bless them all for having the guts and the love for wrestling to give it their all to continue day in and day out!

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Oh god, I'm sorry, but... I think that's the funniest thing I have ever posted. I mean, I make myself laugh a lot, and I have done some fucking whacky things, but that just works SO FUCKING WELL. Oh god, I seriously laughed HARD for about a minute and now I'm feeling a lil dizzy. Oh man... it just works... everything about it works. I've been building to that post for the past few weeks. God bless Jackie Gayda and/or the WWE Staff writer who actually does it.

[AndrewTS 0]

It works! It appears you only had to add an "s" and change one word. Too perfect.

 

I disagree about it being the funniest thing you ever posted, though.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

It's funny on so many levels.

 

1. Miss Jackies own post trying to be inspirational while throwing in a ludicrus amount of "!" and being generally perky.

 

2. Mix that intention and perkiness with the bukkake along with the "I thank the lord" "god bless".

 

3. It fits in with the "... and then they bukkake Miss Jackie"

 

4. It fits in with the "Miss Jackie slept her way to the top"

 

5. It fits in with the "WWE wrestlers sleep their way to the top" which is always fun to insinuate. The "neck injury" thing also works its way in really well.

 

6. The "throw in the towel" line and the "knee injury" just put it over the top for me.

[AndrewTS 0]

If Jackie were Japanese...

 

http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=1808

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

That's it!

 

I'm going to Japan!

[Mecha Mummy 0]

*Grits teeth. Forces grin.* Well... she's so... so... happy! Very, very... happy. Yyyyyeah. On the plus side, it wasn't as pathetic as her first column, but I don't think it was even half as long, so...

[Art Sandusky 0]

Damn you Gosunkugi, you broke up the two man show~