Guest Report post Posted May 2, 2002 For some reason, almost every single time someone gets crotched on the top rope, for the last 6 months + J.R. always says the same really stupid and funny line. When he first said it, we thought he was going insane. JR: "Oww, by gawd that's gotta hurt, unless of course he's wearing a cup....... which is something that I will never know." You mean JR doesn't walk into the locker room and feel everyone's crotch before each match. I just really hope that it happens to a big time heel like Undertaker so he can say. JR: "By Gawd... that vile, vile human being just landed straight on his hellacious nutsack... I only hope that his vile testicles are covered with a cup so that he can have VILE children from hell. That vile, evil, soulless son of a bitch." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Wonderboy Report post Posted May 2, 2002 Somebody mentioned JR's Pat Patterson jokes, and that reminded me of two more. They were both in 2000 when the McMahon-Helmsley Facgime was together. Anyway, the entire Facgime is coming out, and Patterson is walking behind everybody, and JR goes "Patterson coming up the rear." Then the same night, there was a cage match, and the Stooges started attacking Rock, and Patterson hit Rock with a low blow, and JR screams "DREAM COME TRUE FOR PATTERSON!" I miss the Ross/Heyman arguments too. Survivor Series 2001 is one of my favorite ppvs ever, just cause of their announcing. For two guys that supposedly hated each other, they had awesome chemistry. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Spaceman Spiff Report post Posted May 2, 2002 JR: "By Gawd... that vile, vile human being just landed straight on his hellacious nutsack... I only hope that his vile testicles are covered with a cup so that he can have VILE children from hell. That vile, evil, soulless son of a bitch." LOL! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 2, 2002 The JR/Paul Heyman chemistry was golden. One of my favorite quotes was at Wrestlemania X-Seven when they were getting ready for the Gimmick Battle Royal and JR said one of the sickest things I've ever heard in my life: "I feel really sorry that you're not going to be in this next match, Paul. I would have loved to see you in tights for some perversed reason." To which Paul replied: "Hey, at least I'm not the one wearing the stupid cowboy hat." And the No Way Out 2001 quote sounded more to me like: YJJAAAAAHHHHH you bastard KKLAAERRPURGGGGAAAHJJ!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 2, 2002 A little off the subject, but this cracked me up. RVD was wrestling Big Show for the Hardcore Title. Heyman; Why the Hell does RVD have to fight the Big Show? He's 300lbs lighter then him! JR; Well, what the Hell you want me to do about it? Make Big Show go on a Diet? Heyman; Well, Um, Yeah. I do read the Ross Report ya know. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 2, 2002 On Shane McMahon(pardon me if someone has already mentioned this): "Somebody get that kid some Sanka!" On Kane at the Royal Rumble 2001: "Kane is a CAR-NI-VORE(he said it just like that), and Drew Carey is a juicy steak! On taking chairshots: "I'll learn how to do it through a correspondence course." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 3, 2002 One I just remembered...that one match in some 2000 PPV (I forget exactly when) when the Big Show showed up dressed as Hulk Hogan, to face Kurt Angle. At one point in the match JR goes "More people are chanting for Hogan than have in years!" ...of course, what with recent events, it's not quite as funny... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest treble charged Report post Posted May 3, 2002 My favourite JR quote doesn't even take place at a wrestling match. I'll take you back to February 2001. The first ever XFL game (the B game of the night), with JR and the King doing commentary. For some reason, JR felt like calling the game as a wrestling match, and at one point, John Avery took a pass and was in the clear, and JR busts out this one: -"For Gawd's sake, Avery is wide open!" Now, I've come to expect that in wrestling, but I NEVER thought I would hear something like that during a football game. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 3, 2002 My favourite JR quote doesn't even take place at a wrestling match. I'll take you back to February 2001. The first ever XFL game (the B game of the night), with JR and the King doing commentary. For some reason, JR felt like calling the game as a wrestling match, and at one point, John Avery took a pass and was in the clear, and JR busts out this one: -"For Gawd's sake, Avery is wide open!" Now, I've come to expect that in wrestling, but I NEVER thought I would hear something like that during a football game. The XFL is an extreme smash mouth slobberknocker, damn it! or something. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Lord of The Curry Report post Posted May 3, 2002 At Summer Slam 2000 during the TLC match Jeff Hardy gets tossed onto a ladder by Bubba Dudley. JR says: " How do you learn to fall on a damn ladder? YOU DONT!!!" Unforgiven 2001 during Austin vs Angle and Angles post-match celebration. " AND KUUUURD ANGLE! HIS MAW-MAH JACK-IE!!!" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest webmasterofwrestlegame Report post Posted May 3, 2002 This is so good someone should make a website in ode to JR...and they have! Check out http://www.resistolhat.co.uk/ and more importantly download the Rabid Rap - it has all of the classics in there. Enjoy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
