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Guest Suicide King

LOCKDOWN!

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Guest Suicide King

Earlier today:

 

 

*BEEP, BEEP*

 

Johnny Dangerous reaches into his pocket to dig out his cell phone. “Hello?”

 

There is a brief silence, and then Johnny’s eyes grow to the size of saucers as he recognizes the sound of the voice on the other end. “Hey! What’s going on?”

 

“…”

 

“That’s great, man,” the Barracuda exclaims ecstatically. “So, will you be back for the next show?”

 

“…”

 

 

“Oh. Well, how soon before you come back?”

 

“…”

 

“What kind of stuff?”

 

“…”

 

Johnny runs his hand through his hair as a sly grin crosses his face. “Sounds cool. Is there anything I can do to help?”

 

“…”

 

“Well,” says Johnny, “I’m not scheduled to be on the card tonight, but yeah, I’ll do it; anything for a friend!”

 

“…”

 

“No pobo, buddy. I’ll see you soon!” Johnny switches his phone off and heads towards the arena.

 

“Hell yeah,” he says to himself, smiling. “Business is definitely about to pick up!”

 

FADE OUT

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Guest Suicide King

The Smartmarks wrestling Federation presents...

SWF LOCKDOWN, WEDNESDAY, JULY 21ST, LIVE FROM MADISON SQUARE GARDEN! IT’S IN NEW YORK!

 

 

 

MAIN EVENT

HANDICAP MATCH

Janus vs Ced Ordonez & Munich

Janus is back, and to prove he’s ready for his title defense, coming soon, he’ll face two men.

 

WORLD TITLE #2 CONTENDERSHIP

Jamie Drazon vs Ace Lezaire

Ace Lezaire earned this one with his victory on Storm. Jamie Drazon is here out of pity. I said that because JD and I hate each other or something in real life, or maybe, I dunno, but anyway, it’s a shoot brutha. (No, actually because he won the submissions match lol)

 

 

CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE CONTENDERSHIP OVER THE TOP FOURWAY

Alan Clark vs Ryan Dustin vs Austin Sly vs Rob Gilbert

Hot cruiser XXX action as 4 men square off. High flying could be dangerous, as if you go over the top, and both feet touch the floor, you lose.

 

 

 

TAG TITLE CONTENDERSHIP MATCH

Andrea Montgomery & The Birdman vs “The Icon” Max King & Martin “Big Country” Hunt

Through the honor and valor of battles two previous adversaries now find themselves teaming up to battle the forces of Evil. The new hardcore champ looks to make it a two-fer with this win, and The Icon would love to have gold around his waist because it’s cool when you have a woman in your hotel room and you come out of the shower and all you have on is the title belt because damn that’s hot.

 

 

USJL TITLE MATCH

Manson vs The Masked Man©

Manson gets his shot against the sexual maskosaurus four days after he earned it. Will the pressure of being a double champ buckle the Masked Man like the pressure of a meteor into the earth buckled the entire dinosaur race?

 

 

SINGLhES MATCH

Dace Nigt vs “The Corona” Vladimir Everheart

Vlad... Vlad... where have I heard that before? Hmm... just a coincidence, I think.

 

 

SINGLES MATCH

Petey The Irish Penguin vs “The Paladin” Chance Silver

HIS EYES CHANGE COLOR WHEN HE PRAYS TO GOD. SERIOUSLY. Anyway, a new player in the federation looks to make a “glorious” mark in his debut match.

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Guest Suicide King

Petey vs. Chance Paladin!

 

Double No Show!

 

Cocksmokers!

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Guest Suicide King

The SWF has sold out Madison Square Garden once again and every single fan is showing they’re very happy to be at the show. Huge full colour signs of half the roster can be seen dotted around, along with the faithful heel section for people that just want to be like that.

Someone has set up their own announcing desk, complete with a duo in Cyclone Comet and Bobby Riley masks (yes, the company sells Bobby Riley face masks). Sitting at ringside are the real commentary team, completely with Riley in an “I <3 NY” t-shirt.

 

Comet: Welcome back Citizens to SWF Lockdown. We’re here in Madison Square Garden for another jam-packed SWF show!

 

Riley: And as you can see Comet, I actually like the place we’re holding the show in for once. Many New York has some great places.

 

Comet: I’m sure it does Robert and I know what’s on the other side of that double-sided t-shirt as well. Let’s hope the folks at home can’t see it.

 

Riley: Bah, spoil a young man’s fun Comet. Still, I really did like that new guy Chance Silver, he’s got the look Comet.

 

Comet: The look of an Unholy one I tell you! Still to come on Lockdown, we’ve got a USJL Title match, contendership matches for the Cruiserweight and Tag Team Titles, as well as a number two shot for the World Title.

 

Riley: But now we have to sit through a Dace Night match. Someone wake me up in five minutes when he starts losing ok?

 

Funyon: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following match will be a one on one contest for one fall…

 

Yyyyyyaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!

 

Funyon: Introducing firstly, weighing in at two hundred and forty five pounds, from Svalbard Norway, he is …’THE CORONA’ VLADIMIR EVERHEART!

 

Yyyyyyaaahhhhhh!

 

Mourning Palace kicks into life over the speakers as the dark blue lights swamp the arena in near darkness. Huge coils of smoke curl up from the entrance ramp as Vladimir slowly makes his way out. His mask glinting in the spotlight, the Corona makes his way down to the ring and hops up onto the apron. Leaping over the ropes, Vlad drops to one knee as the lights comes back up to another pop from the fans.

 

Funyon: And his opponent, weighing in at two hundred and fifty two pounds, from Birmingham England, he is … DACE…

 

FUCK!

 

Funyon: NIGHT!

 

Hero rips into life over the arena with a wall of sparks from the pyro lighting up the entrance ramp. Storming out from the ramp, Dace looks across the NYC crowd as he makes his way down to the ring. Rolling under the ropes, Night climbs the turnbuckles and throws his arms up the fans before pulling off his t-shirt and flinging it into the fourth row. Dropping back to the ring, Dace moves to face Vladimir Everheart in the centre.

 

Comet: Dace has been facing a range of SWF talent lately. But now he’s up against one of the newest entrants to the fed and young Vlad might be put through his paces here.

 

Riley: If only he lived up to his namesake this guy could be a lot more fun you know.

 

DING, DING, DING!

 

DACE F’N’ NIGHT! DACE F’N’ NIGHT! DACE F’N’ NIGHT! DACE F’N’ NIGHT! DACE F’N’ NIGHT!

 

Throwing his arms up to the call of the fans, Dace nods his head with a grin across his face. Reaching out, The White Night extends his hand to the Corona for a handshake. Looking down from under his mask, Vlad shoots out his own hand and excepts the shake, with a few words of Norwegian that cause Dace to chuckle. Spreading his arms out, Night waves the Corona one to take the first shot. Shaking his head slowly, Vladimir swings out with all his might, drilling his palm into Dace’s head.

 

SMACK! Oooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Shaking his head and holding it with one hand for a moment, Dace shots Everheart a grin before stepping up for show the rookie what a hard shot is. Spreading his arms out in the same manner, Vlad cocks his head back and readies himself. Sending his arm crashing forwards like a tidal wave, Dace jams the point of his elbow into Vlad’s masked face as full force.

 

CRACK! Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Comet: Dace and Everheart just starting things off with a friendly exchange of blows to feel each other out. This one could turn out to be interesting.

 

Riley: Oh please, just get on with it and kill each other already!

 

Slowly cracking his neck back into place, Vladimir recovers the step he lost from stumbling backwards. Nodding his head, Vlad brings up his defences as Horrorcore moves in to really start things off. Pushing his whole body weight forwards, Dace launches off another Elbow Smash that cracks Everheart full in the face and sends him stumbling backwards a step. But Vladimir regains his step and fires right back with a Palm Strike to the face that sends Night’s head snapping backwards as a full blown duel erupts in the middle of the ring.

 

CRACK! SMACK! CRACK! SMACK! CRACK! SMACK! CRACK! SMACK! CRACK! SMACK! SMACK! CRACK! CRACK! CRACK!

 

Rrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

The wave of three elbows in a row bursts through the Corona’s defences as Dace pounces on him. Whipping Everheart across the ring into the ropes, the White Night pauses for a moment before racing after him at full speed, throwing his leg up for a Yakuza Kick. But Vladimir shows his own back of tricks as he leans sideways, completely side stepping the Yakuza Kick. As Dace helplessly sails past, Vladimir throws his hand out in and open palm and drills it straight into Night’s face with a blow that knocks the Hardcore Goth from his feet and down to the mat.

 

BAM! Yyyyyyyaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Comet: Vladimir lost that duel but he won the battle. A Sidestep Palm Strike to counter the Yakuza Kick.

 

Riley: Someone kicking the shit out of Dace Night, this match just got interesting Comet.

 

Rather than going for a cover, Everheart steps backwards and waves Dace Night back up to his feet. Slowly rolling back up, Dace shakes his head out for a moment before grinning to Vladimir again. Vlad twitches and shoots off another Palm Strike but this time Horrorcore side steps and snaps a High Kick into Vlad’s chest. A second one connects with Vlad’s face and then a third does as well. Latching onto an arm, Dace yanks the Corona in towards him and hauls Everheart up into the air. Making a one eighty twist, Horrorcore sends Vlad crashing down into the mat with a Spinebuster Slam that rocks the ring. Following it up, Night drops all his weight knee first into Vladimir’s face. Then dropping into a cover, Dace watches as Referee Hebner slides in to start the count.

 

……ONE!

 

 

…KICKOUT!

 

Yyyyaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Comet: A set of High Kicks and a Spinebuster from the White Night gets the first fall of this match.

 

Riley: Oh great, this match just go boring again. Come on Vlad, I know you’ve got that kill instinct really, take him out.

 

Leaping away as Vlad kicks out, Dace backs up a few feet as Vlad scrambles to his feet, as he does so, Night leaps in again. Grabbing the Corona around his head, Dace starts to drive his knee into Everheart’s midsection over and over, forcing him to double over. From there, Dace keeps up his bone crushing assault of knees, this time driving them into Vladimir’s masked face. Knocking the young Norwegian half silly with the knee assault, the Hardcore Goth clamps on a Front Facelock and easily hauls him up into the air. Pausing for a moment or two, just to let all the blood rush brainwards, Dace kicks his feet out, falling back to the mat and spiking Everheart with a Sheer Drop Brainbuster.

 

WHAM!

 

Rrrrrraaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Rolling over, Dace hooks a leg and makes another cover as Hebner leaps in to count the fall again.

 

……ONE!

 

 

 

 

……TWO-KICKOUT!

 

Yyyyyyyaaaaaaahhhhhhh!

 

VLAD! VLAD! VLAD! VLAD! VLAD! VLAD! VLAD! VLAD! VLAD!

 

Comet: Sheer Drop Brainbuster but Vladimir kicks out right on the two. It looks like he’s earning the respect of the Madison Square Garden fans as well.

 

Riley: Oh god, why can’t we have more people like Tom Flesher damn it. Who want to win something for once!

 

Shaking his head, Dace rolls to his feet before pushing himself back up. Horrorcore grabs Everheart by the mask and starts to drag him up, snapping off an elbow for good measure. A swift kick to the ribs doubles Vlad over and Dace drags him into the trap of a Standing Headscissors before shifting both his arms into a Double Underhook. Hauling backwards, Night lifts the two forty five of Vlad’s body up into the air but the Corona has other ideas. Quickly wrapping his legs around the White Night’s neck, Vlad desperately throws his body weight backwards and takes Dace other with a Hurricanrana.

 

Ooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Skidding along the mat for a few feet, Dace finally stops himself and springs back to his feet. Slowly stumbling back up, Vladimir tries to shake out the cobwebs as Dace comes rushing towards him. Barely ducking under a Lariat, Everheart throws himself into gear and charges across the ring. Leaping up onto the ropes, the Corona throws himself backwards, twisting in the air, wrapping his legs around Night’s neck and swinging his weight around, taking them down to the mat with a Flying Headscissors. Skidding across the mat again, Dace stops in a heap and his far slowly to get up this time. Everheart ducks through the ropes onto the apron. Leaping onto the top rope and pausing for a moment, watching like a predator, Vladimir dives through the air and sends both feet crashing into Night’s chest.

 

BAM! Rrrrrrraaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Comet: And Vladimir mounts a comeback against the White Night! Two headscissors and a Springboard Dropkick takes Dace down!

 

Riley: I don’t like this guy, but anyone that kicks Dace’s ass in a good man in my books. But by the looks of him, it’s not just my books I’d want him in.

 

Dropping onto Night’s chest, Vladimir hooks both legs and leans back into another cover as Hebner jumps in to count the fall.

 

……ONE!

 

 

 

 

……TWO!

KICKOUT!

 

Yyyyyyaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!

 

Wrenching the White Night up as he rises, Vladimir launches off a fresh wave of kicks into Horrorcore’s chest and head, the sound echoing around the Garden with each blow. Clamping on a Front Facelock, Vlad snaps his weight backwards and spike Dace into the mat with a DDT. Holding on and rolling over, Vlad comes back to his feet and shifts his grip into a Waistlock. Arching his body, the Corona hauls backwards and takes Horrorcore into the air before dropping him to the mat with a Gutwrench Suplex. Quickly floating over, Vladimir drops into yet another cover.

 

……ONE!

 

 

 

……TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Comet: Vladimir is really taking it to the White Night here. But he’ll need to step it up a gear to score a win against Dace Night.

 

Riley: Well, when you head in pure skull and pretty much no brain, it’s hard to get knocked silly.

 

Leaping back up to his feet once again, Everheart shakes his head before dragging Dace up. Snapping a quick pair of Palm Strikes into Dace’s head, Vlad twist on his heel and sends Dace flying across the ring and into the turnbuckles with a thud. Launching himself, the Corona slams his palm into Dace’s jaw and spins him around in the corner. Quickly bounding up to the top turnbuckle, Vladimir seats himself and wraps his arm around Night’s head in a Front Faceclock. Springing from the turnbuckles with a twist, Everheart sends all his weight plummeting matwards with a Swinging DDT that spikes Horrorcore’s head into the match.

 

BAM! Ooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Leaving Dace laying on the mat, Vlad races back to his feet and up the turnbuckles. Quickly climbing to the top rope, Vlad positions himself for a moment and checks that Night is still down on the mat. Leaping through the air, the Corona sails down with his leg out and drops it straight across Night’s throat with a Guillotine Legdrop.

 

WHAM! Yyyyyyaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Dropping straight into another cover, Vlad presses down with all his weight.

 

……ONE!

 

 

 

 

……TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Yyyyyyaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

LET’S GO DACE! LET’S GO DACE! LET’S GO DACE! LET’S GO DACE! LET’S GO DACE! LET’S GO DACE!

 

Comet: Tornado DDT and a Guillotine Legdrop gets another close fall for Vladimir Everheart but it’s still not enough.

 

Riley: I knew he lacked real skill. To go in for the kill and finish things off once and for all. Bah, what a loser.

 

Slamming his fists into the mat in frustration, Everheart scoops down and hauls Horrorcore up again, wrapping an arm around his throat for an Uranage Suplex. Lashing out with desperation Elbow Smashes, Horrorcore drills them into the side of the Corona’s head. Spinning him around, Dace wraps one arm around the Corona’s waist and the other hooks his leg. Lifting Vlad up into the air, Night steps forwards and dumps him on the top turnbuckle.

 

Rrrrrraaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Climbing through the ropes onto the apron, Dace clamber up to the second rope on the outside and starts to drill home elbow after elbow into the head of the struggling Vladimir. Looping on a Front Facelock, Dace rests one foot on the top rope, pushing himself up as he drags Vlad all the way up into the air. Standing on the top turnbuckle, looking down onto the floor…… Dace falls backwards, taking Vlad over head and down…down…

 

 

All the way down……

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CRUNCH!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!

 

Comet: SUPERPLEX ALL THE WAY TO THE FLOOR!

 

Riley: Jesus Christ. Those two are going to be dead after that. Ahhh, nothing like watching two idiots kill themselves. Good fun TV.

 

Leaning over the ropes, Hebner starts up a count as both men lay in a broken heap on the floor, not even moving.

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THREE!

 

 

FOUR!

 

 

FIVE!

 

GET THE FUCK UP! GET THE FUCK UP! GET THE GUCK UP! GET THE FUCK UP! GET THE FUCK UP!

 

SIX!

 

Slowly shaking, Dace begins to beat on the floor and tries to force himself up.

 

SEVEN!

 

Following behind, Vladimir shakes himself into life, slowly climbing back into his feet.

 

EIGHT!

 

Both men are unsteadily back up onto their feet…

 

NINE!

 

Dace dives forwards for the ropes as fast as he can manage with Vlad just a few feet behind…

 

 

 

 

…...

 

 

 

Dace make it under the ropes …TEN! And Vladimir does, just a fraction of a second after the ten count.

 

DING! DING! DING!

 

Funyon: Ladies and Gentlemen, here is your winner via Count Out… DACE NNNIIIGGHHHTTT!

 

Yyyyyyyyaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Comet: My god, the White Night beat the count from that Superplex to the outside and even Vladimir was only a fraction of a second behind.

 

Riley: And that fraction of a second is the big difference between winners and losers in wrestling.

 

Using the ropes to support themselves, Dace and Vlad stand on shaky legs, looking out at the cheering Madison Square Garden, which chants on for them.

 

DACE! DACE! DACE! VLAD! VLAD! VLAD! DACE! DACE! DACE! VLAD! VLAD! VLAD!

Edited by Grand Slam

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Guest Suicide King

SWF LOCKDOWN comes back to air, the fans at home greeted by thousands upon thousands of screaming fans. Signs litter the landscape, specks of white spread across the arena. Soon enough, the voices of Cyclone Comet and Bobby Riley break in…

 

"(Comet) Welcome back to Lockdown, LIVE from Madison Square Garden! The Cyclone Comet is here with Bobbo Riley, where we've already witnessed Petey the Irish Penguin versus debutee Chance Silver, and Dace Night taking on Vladimir Everheart! But next up, we have The Masked Man defending the USJL Championship against Manson!"

 

"(Riley) Manson is in for it now, after squeaking out a win on Storm to get this opportunity. Masked Man is a strong competitor, trained by William Hearford. He's in the midst of a twenty days plus USJL reign, and is one-half of the interim tag champs! What has Manson done? Nothing, that's what!"

 

"(Comet) I must agree, for once. Citizen Manson is at a severe disadvantage, even more so because he's been working injured, as has been noted. But the question is whether Masked Man can capitalize on that, because while he was trained by Judge Mental, submission wrestling is not his strong suit…"

 

The cameras switch to Funyon, already in the ring…

 

"(Funyon) Ladies and Gentlemen, the following is a USJL Championship Match, scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first…"

 

The house lights dim and multi-colored strobes flash as "Snap Your Fingers, Snap Your Neck" by Prong hits and the fans stand. Manson emerges through the entrance curtain, to the ovation of the MSG crowd, and he heads straight down the ramp..

 

"(Funyon) The challenger, hailing from Denver, Colorado -- he weighs in at two-hundred and thirty pounds, and stands six feet even! MMMAAAAANNNSOOONNN!"

 

As he hits the foot of the ramp, Manson flexes his knee, and rolls into the ring. He pops up and immediately heads to his corner in the lower right portion of the ring, where he waits on the champion...

 

"(Comet) Of course, Manson makes his way here after pinning Max King with the Killing Joke, in a Fatal Fourway on Storm…"

 

"(Riley) He got lucky…"

 

Manson stretches in his corner, and MSG's house lights head into a strobe effect, as "Misirlou" by Dick Dale and his Del-Tones rocks the speakers! Masked Man enters to a generally positive reaction. TMM heads down the ramp, briefcase in hand.

 

"(Funyon) And his opponent, representing 42nd Street! Hailing from Orofino, Idaho -- he weighs in at two-hundred and forty three pounds, and stands five feet, eleven inches tall! He is one half of the SWF Tag Team Champions, and is the current USJL Champion… THE MAAASKED MAAANN!"

 

The Masked Man places his briefcase against the ringsteps, and jogs up the steps, next taking hold of the top rope and slingshotting himself into the ring. He leaps up onto the second rope and removes his jacket, throwing it down to the ground, afterwards bowing to the crowd. He jumps down and unhooks the USJL Championshp from his waist, handing it to referee Matthew Kivell, who holds it up for the crowd to see. Kivell hands the belt to Funyon, who exits the ring. The Masked Man backs into his corner and jogs in place, warming up for the match…

 

"(Comet) Meanwhile on Storm, Sexual Maskosaurus successfully defended the Tag Team Championship along with Todd Cortez, taking out Revolution Zero…"

 

Kivell takes his position between Manson and The Masked Man, and calls for the bell…

 

::DING DING!::

 

Kivell quickly backs out of the way, as Manson and The Masked Man circle the ring. TMM halts and calls for a test of strength, and Manson complies after a hesitant moment. They lock up, but Manson quickly sneaks his head underneath the arm of TMM, and suplexes him over while keeping the hands locked. Manson releases the hold, and gets to his feet, as does TMM. Manson takes TMM by the arm and whips him across the ring toward the north ropes. On the rebound, Manson turns his back toward TMM and smashes his face in with a back elbow! TMM goes down to the mat!

 

"(Comet) Manson with a back elbow to TMM, after besting him in a test of strength!"

 

"(Riley) Manson didn't best anyone. He opted out for the suplex before the lock up even got underway."

 

Manson initates the lock up with TMM this time, now with a collar-elbow. Manson gains the initial advantage, however TMM turns the tables, standing his ground and managing to push Manson back. Manson tries to find his footing, but cannot. Manson hobbles backwards, TMM pushing him all the way to the north ropes. At the request of Kivell, TMM breaks the hold against the ropes, but quickly fires off two right hands, catching Manson off guard and staggering him. TMM delivers another punch for good measure, and takes Manson by the arm, to whip him to the opposite side of the ring. Manson springs off, and TMM hoists him up by the legs. Then, in an instant, TMM drops him across the top rope with a stun gun! Manson goes down to the mat, convulsing as he grabs his neck.

 

"(Comet) Masked Fury droppng Manson onto the ropes with a hot shot, crushing his throat!'

 

Manson rolls onto his hands and knees, and TMM is quick to capitalize. He takes Manson by the back of the head, pulls him up, and drags him over to the upper right corner, where he rams his head into the turnbuckle! Manson catches himself with the ropes, and TMM pushes him up against the turnbuckle, back first. TMM spins in place, in a dance blatantly reminiscent of La Parka, before turning a shoulder to Manson, and…

 

 

*SLAP!*

 

 

"WHOOO!"

 

 

Caving his bare chest in with a knife-edge chop! Manson grits his teeth from the chop, as…

 

 

*SLAP!*

 

 

"WHOOOO!"

 

 

The Masked Man hits another stinging chop!

 

 

*SLAP!*

 

 

"WHOOOOOO!"

 

 

Followed by another! Manson breathes heavy and fires off a forearm to the face, knocking TMM back a step. Manson escapes the corner, walking along the side of the ring, down to the bottom right corner. TMM follows and Manson turns around, but TMM gets a boot to the stomach. Manson hits another kick to the gut, doubling TMM over. Manson takes TMM into a front facelock, and hooks his waistband. Manson lifts TMM up into a vertical suplex position, and drops him stomach first across the top rope. With the momentum coming off the rope, Manson takes TMM back and drops him with a slingshot suplex! Manson floats into the cover…

 

 

"ONE!!"

 

 

 

But gets only a one count, as TMM kicks out!

 

"(Comet) And Manson hits the slingshot suplex!"

 

"(Riley) Back in the old days, that would've finished off a man. But, noooo, these days they're only used for one counts, and I'm sick of it!"

 

"(Comet) You know all about finishing men off, so I shall take your word for it."

 

"(Riley) You're damn right I know how to finish them off! Wait, we are talking wrestling here, right?!"

 

Manson grabs TMM by the head and lifts him up from the mat, and maneuvers behind him with a waistlock. Manson hoists TMM up, and drops him back down onto his stomach immediately, still keeping the hold on. From there, Manson releases the hold and mounts TMM, grinding his face to the mat and raining down with forearm after forearm to the back of TMM's neck. Manson stands from TMM, so as not to be disqualified, and waits for hiim to stand. TMM does so, and Manson tries the collar-elbow once again. Manson plants his feet into the mat and pushes on TMM, this time gaining the clear advantage and forcing TMM into the upper left corner.

 

"(Comet) Manson has TMM where he wants him now!"

 

Manson breaks the collar-elbow, and immediately drives a back elbow into the side of TMM's head! Manson then rocks TMM with a right hand, and finishes up with a left hook. TMM clings to the ropes, as Manson takes his hand and whips him to the opposite corner of the ring. TMM hits the turnbuckles, and Manson runs in, leaping and trying for a splash. However, TMM ducks out of the way just in time, as Manson hits the turnbuckle chest first! In desperation, Manson looks for TMM, however TMM grabs Manson by the back of his head, while looking him in the eyes, and drives his face into the mat as he sits out! TMM goes for the cover…

 

 

"ONE!"

 

 

 

But Manson kicks out!

 

"(Comet) Manson gets a little too ahead of himself, and TMM turns the tide with a sit-out face slam!"

 

"(Riley) Manson managed a big offensive spurt, but TMM showed why he is one of the best."

 

TMM gets to his feet, and allows Manson to do the same. As Manson stands, TMM is immediately on him, wrapping an arm around his neck, and dropping to the mat just as quickly with a DDT, spiking Manson's head into the canvas! TMM is unrelenting, however, as he doesn't let go of the hold, instead weaving his free arm underneath the armpit of Manson and locking his hands.

 

"(Comet) TMM with the headlock!"

 

Manson posts his hands on the mat, and goes into a headstand, about to go into a bridge or hopefully flip his way out of the hold, however this only adds to the pressure, both on his knee and his neck, and he flips back over. Then, he tries tugging at TMM's mask, desperately trying to free himself, but Kivell warns against it. Manson can barely hear Kivell's muffled voice through TMM's headlock and his own pain and panic, but he reluctantly complies regardless.

 

"(Comet) Manson seems to be in dire straits now, a world of pain as TMM keeps the pressure on…"

 

Manson digs his hands into the mat once again, screaming from the pain, as he tries to push himself toward the ropes, hoping for salvation. However, his hopes are dashed as TMM only tightens his grip, forcing Manson to resort to his fists, as he begins punching and pounding away at the sides of TMM, no doubt bruising his ribs and kidneys. Manson firmly places his hands on the mat once again. Again Manson pushes off, this time freeing himself as he pops out of TMM's grip, but coming up lame, his knee buckling as he lands on the mat! Manson keeps at it, albeit slowly, as he charges toward the aisleside ropes, springing off. The Masked Man is two steps ahead of him, though, as he jumps up and meets Manson head on, flattening him with a lariat!

 

"(Comet) Manson frees himself, but goes back down!"

 

"(Riley) Manson screwed it up for himself… a few more well-placed attacks, and this match is TMM's to win."

 

Manson reaches for his head, but TMM doesn't allow him a moment of rest, as he props Manson up into a sitting position, wrapping his arms around Manson's head. Manson cries out, his face turning red, as TMM keeps a vice-like grip and wrenches Manson's neck, while cutting off blood circulation and oxygen. Soon enough, Manson's hands drop, his eyes barely staying open. The fans begin to chant, as Kivell checks on Manson …

 

Kivell raises Manson's arm, and lets go… it drops once…

 

 

"MAN! SON!"

 

 

*CLAP! CLAP!*

 

 

Kivell goes through the same routine… and it drops again…

 

 

"MAN! SON!"

 

 

*CLAP! CLAP!*

 

 

Kivell lifts the arm again, and it drops… but by some small miracle, Manson keeps his arm raised just enough… With a second wind, Manson strains, and swings his arms, before getting his legs under him. Manson gradually gets to his feet, and drops to his bottom again, impacting TMM's jaw against the top of his head with a jawbreaker to the cheers of the fans!

 

"(Comet) The crowd is clearly rooting for Manson now, for some reason, as Manson fights out of another of TMM's holds…"

 

Manson rolls to his knees, and gets to his feet, as TMM rests against the north ropes. TMM takes a swing at Manson, which he blocks. Manson unleashes a forearm to the face, and takes hold of TMM's hand, to whip him to the opposite side ropes. TMM holds his ground, and Manson is sent across the ring instead. Manson bounces off the ropes, as TMM waits. TMM lifts Manson up for another stun gun, but Manson instead crashes down with an chop to his neck, and TMM releases Manson prematurely. Manson catches himself against the ropes, and promptly lifts a stunned TMM up, dropping him throat first on the rope! As TMM stumbles back, Manson goes down to the mat and hooks TMM by the leg, rolling him onto his shoulders…"

 

"(Comet) Manson, paying TMM back for the hot shot early in the match!"

 

"(Riley) Damn him! Manson isn't supposed to be putting up this kind of fight!"

 

"(Comet) Schoolboy!"

 

 

 

"ONE!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"TWO!!"

 

 

KICKOUT! KICKOUT BY TMM!

 

 

The crowd lets out an exasperated sigh, as Manson gets to his feet, and lifts TMM up by his collar. Manson unleashes another chop to the neck, knocking TMM back down to a knee. Manson pulls him back up with both hands, and weaves his head under TMM's left arm, whilst wrapping his near arm around TMM's neck, and propping his leg behind TMM. Before Manson can set the STO in motion, TMM elbows his way out of it. Manson goes down to a knee, but bounces back up, as TMM wraps his arms around Manson from behind with a waistlock. TMM pops his hips and lifts Manson up, planting him with a ROMANIAN SUPLEX, unlocking his hands afterwards. TMM pins with a lateral press with a hook of the leg, and Matt Kivell counts…

 

"(Comet) TMM with a pin off the german suplex…"

 

 

 

"ONE!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"TWO!!"

 

 

 

 

MANSON GETS THE SHOULDER UP!

 

 

 

TMM gets to his feet, and waits for Manson to stand, throwing a couple of right hands at him as he does so. Manson stumbles back to the aisleside ropes, where TMM takes a hold of his hand, and whips him to the opposite side ropes. As Manson bounces off, TMM meets him in the center of the ring with a kick to the gut. Manson doubles over, and TMM stands off to the side, grabbing a hold of Manson's head and placing it against his shoulder. TMM hits the mat, whipping Manson down with a swinging neckbreaker! Manson slowly gets to his knees, as TMM once again positions himself for a headlock, this time wrapping his arm around Manson's head in an inverted facelock. Not wanting any part of yet another hold, Manson wildly swings his arms and spins before TMM can possibly lock his hands, finding himself staring down at the mat. As if a lightbulb had appeared over his head, Manson hooks TMM's waistband and suplexes him over with a northern lights! Manson goes for a bridge, but his body can't support the weight, as he releases the hold…

 

"(Comet) And Manson nails the northern lights suplex, but can't hold a bridge, with his knee, and no doubt his head and neck, still giving him some problems."

 

"(Riley) That's why I'm not panicking. There's no way Manson can make it through with a win!"

 

Both men try to slowly get to their feet, exhausted and wracked with pain. TMM lands another kick to the stomach, again doubling Manson over. TMM takes Manson's hand, pulling Manson toward himself, and as TMM swings his arm for the short-arm clothesline, Manson ducks! TMM releases his hold on Manson, now with both hands free and facing TMM's back. Manson wraps his arms around TMM's head, locking in a standing sleeper! The Masked Man finds himself fading quickly, and realizing the situation he's in, begins to make his way toward the ropes.

 

"(Comet) Oh, my! Citizen Manson now has TMM in a sleeper hold of his own!"

 

Manson doesn't give TMM any quarter, as he keeps the hold locked tight. TMM strains for a way out of the hold, in the same desperate situation Manson was in earlier. With the same despair, pain, and exhaustion etched on his face as Manson had earlier, he finally makes it to the ropes, causing Kivell to call for the break.

 

"(Comet) Thankfully for him, Sexual Maskosaurus manages to get out of the sleeper…"

 

Still, the sleeper took enough out of TMM, causing him to hang off the ropes hapazardly. Manson wipes a bit of sweat off his brow, before lifting a knee to the gut of TMM, causing him to keel over. Manson places TMM in a standing headscissors, and wraps his arms around the waist. Manson tries to lift TMM up for the powerbomb… but cannot, as his knee shakes and wobbles, and TMM keeps a white knuckle grip on Manson's jeans. Manson tries once again, only to face more of the same. Finally, TMM stands up, and backdrops Manson, countering the powerbomb!

 

"(Comet) Manson going for a powerbomb, but despite his knee not taking much damage, it's clearly not up to par for these kinds of moves late in the match."

 

As both men get to their feet, TMM threads his head underneath the arm of Manson, and palms his face. With a simple leg sweep, TMM forces Manson down to the mat with the Maski Pad! The Masked Man goes for a cover…

 

"(Comet) And now TMM gets the Maski Pad, Judge Mental's reverse half-nelson STO!"

 

 

 

"ONE!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"TWOOO!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"THR--"

 

 

 

 

HOLY FUCKING HELL! MANSON JUST BARELY GETS A SHOULDER UP!

 

 

Masked Fury doggedly brings Manson up to his feet, bringing him over to the lower left corner. TMM positions himself on the second rope, and places Manson in a facelock. TMM signals to the crowd, causing them to let out a cheer, but Manson repeatedly punches the gut of TMM, causing him to let go of the hold. Manson breaks free completely, and wraps his arms around the legs of TMM. With a grunt and pure strength, Manson brings TMM off the ropes, and turns one-hundred and eighty degrees, planting TMM with a SPINEBUSTER! Manson rolls into the cover, with a hook of the leg… Kivell counts!

 

"(Comet) Sweet merciful Pepsi Max! Spinebuster off the second rope!"

 

 

"ONE!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"TWOOO!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"THR--"

 

 

 

 

BUT TMM. KICKS. OUT!

 

 

 

Manson gets to his knees, and up to his feet, bringing TMM up with him. TMM, however, has enough to fire off a couple elbows to Manson's gut. TMM gets to his feet, wrapping his arm around Manson's head, hooking the tights, and lifting him up. TMM cannot, however, and he sets Manson back down, unable to get him up for the Cautionary Tale of Sexual Maskosaurus. Free from TMM, Manson turns his back to him, reaches back, and wraps his arms around Mask's head. TMM is quick to push Manson off, shoving him chest first against the aisleside ropes. TMM turns his back toward Manson, and hooks his arms, bringing him down in a backslide!

 

 

 

 

"ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"TWO!!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"THRE---"

 

 

 

 

BUT MANSON KICKS OUT AGAIN!

 

 

 

TMM can only shake his head, as he pulls Manson up by the arm, and wraps that same arm around Manson's throat. TMM now with his back toward Manson, prepares to yank him down with Lineage, the arm-wrench neckbreaker, but Manson spins out of the position, maneuvering his way out of the arm-wrench and breaking the hold. Quickly, Manson again positions himself with his back to The Masked Man, reaching back with his arms. Before TMM can react once more…

 

 

 

*WHAM!*

 

 

 

TMM FACES THE CONSEQUENCES! MANSON PINS HIM! KIVELL COUNTS!

 

 

 

 

 

"ONE!!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"TWOO!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"THREEE!"

 

 

::DING DING!::

 

 

"(Funyon) Your winner… and NEW USJL CHAMPION… MMAAAANNSSOOONN!"

 

The crowd lets out an exasperated scream, as the announcement is made and "Snap Your Fingers, Snap Your Neck" plays. Kivell hurriedly rushes over to a ring attendant to grab the USJL Championship, to hand it to Manson. As Manson looks down at the belt, he smiles. The smile telling of a man who, through the ups and the downs, finally gets to go down in SWF history.

 

"(Comet) Never in a million years did I think Manson would win the belt on this night, but he finally captured gold with the Diamond Cutter, which he dubs the Consequences!"

 

"(Riley) I have to hand it to him, but no doubt, everyone who was swarming around that belt before, will be gunning for Manson."

 

"(Comet) You're right about that. Manson has a tough road ahead of him in keeping that belt around his waist. Well, up next, we have a Tag Title Contendership Match, with The Birdman and Andrea Montgomery taking on Max King and Martin Hunt. Stay tuned!"

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Guest Suicide King

The Masked Man walks wearily through the halls of Madison Square Garden, heading back towards his dressing room after an exhausting match with Manson. His mask is soaked with sweat, and he is breathing heavily.

 

Just as he turns the corner, he walks past a group of wrestlers, road agents and ring crew who appear to be engrossed in a deep conversation. Sexual Maskosaurus pays them little attention, until he happens to hear the voice of Johnny Dangerous over everyone else:

 

“Yeah, and then Dub Cee told me that, when he gets back, Van Siclen is as good as dead!”

 

Hearing the name of Todd Cortez’s other partner, the Masked Man suddenly becomes interested, and he sneaks behind some electrical equipment in order to eavesdrop on the conversation.

 

“So, Johnny,” asks one roadie, “when did Wildchild say that he’d be back?”

 

“Well, I can’t really say,” replies the Barracuda, much louder than one would think he’d have to. “He wants it to be a surprise, because he doesn’t want Van Siclen to know when he’s coming, but I can assure you, when he gets hear, Van Siclen better head for the hills!”

 

As the group continues its excited chatter, Johnny notices the Masked Man getting up from his hiding place out of the corner of his eye and running off in the direction of the nearest telephone.

 

“So far, so good,” Johnny thinks to himself with a smile. “This is working like a charm.”

 

FADE OUT

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Guest Suicide King

Birdman and his agent, Michael Anderson walk out of their dressing room when they run into “Hollywood” Spike Jenkins and Sean Davis of Revolution Zero.

 

“Out of the way, rookie,” grumbles Spike as he brushes past Birdman. Suddenly, he stops when he remembers a rumor that he heard about Birdman last week, and turns to face him. He grabs Birdman by the shoulder, who had already begun to head in the opposite direction, and spins him around. “Listen here, Birdman,” growls Spike, “we’ve heard all about you. The word is that you’re here to try and get somebody. Well, I’m just here to let you know that if you mess with one member of Revolution Zero, you mess with ALL of us! So, just think about that!”

 

He looks expectantly at Birdman, as though expecting him to reply, but the Bird simply stares back at him from beneath the mask. Finally, after a few agonizing seconds, Sean Davis taps Spike on the shoulder, saying, “Come on, man; Toxxic is expecting us. We don’t want to be late!”

 

“Okay,” says Spike. But, just before he turns to leave, he leans in to Birdman’s face, and hisses, “Just remember, we’re watching you. If you think you’re here for Toxxic, you’d better get the hell out now, before we (bleep) you up!” With that, he turns around on his heel and sprints down the hall to catch up with the Perfect Storm.

 

Birdman leans over and whispers something into his agent’s ear, who calmly replies, “I wouldn’t worry about that, son. In fact, the more people there are worried about it, the better it is for us. Now, come on; let’s see if Miss Montgomery is ready for our match.”

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Guest Suicide King

We return from commercial to find the camera focused on Cyclone Comet and Bobby Riley. “Welcome back to Lockdown, ladies and gentlemen,” says Comet. “We’ve already had a tremendous night of action, and we’ve still got more to come, including another handicap match for the World Heavyweight Champion!”

 

“Janus is doing an excellent job of preparing for Ground Zero,” adds Riley. “He’s going to be totally ready for the challenge of having to defend against both Tom Flesher and Toxxic!”

 

“Coming up next, though,” continues Comet, “we have a couple of unlikely teams that have been given a unique opportunity: last week on Storm, legendary IGNWF superstar Andrea Montgomery made her return to the ring after three years to take on one of the SWF’s newest stars, the Birdman. The two showed that they have a great deal of mutual respect for each other, and now they’ve been put together as a team and given the opportunity to win a shot at the SWF Tag Team Championship, if they can get by the team of Martin “Big Country” Hunt and “The Icon” Max King!”

 

“I’ve got to give the edge to King and Hunt,” says Riley. “This is only Drea’s second match back, and I’m still not convinced that Birdman has what it takes to compete at this level; he pulled off a couple of fluke wins, but now the competition is about to get much tougher! They’re giving away too much size and too much power to King and Hunt!”

 

There is suddenly a mixture of boos and wolf whistles as Kelly Connelly makes her way down towards the ring. She walks up the steel stairs and steps seductively between the top and middle ropes to enter the ring. She then marches over to Funyon where she demands the microphone from him.

 

“It is my pleasure to introduce to you,” she says, “the future number one contenders to the Tag Team Championship!”

 

With that, the stage erupts into a pillar of fire as Saliva’s “Superstar” begins to play. As the pyrotechnical explosion dies down, Max King steps out from behind the curtain, with his tag team partner Martin Hunt trailing closely behind him. “Making his way to the ring at this time,” says Kelly, “accompanied by his tag team partner, Martin “Big Country” Hunt, it is your honor and my pleasure to present to all you fat, out of shape, New York nitwits… Wrestling’s Superman himself, a Superior wrestling talent, and the Sexiest Man Alive… “The ICON… MAX KIIING!” Connelly’s shrill voice and inane comments put off the majority of New Yorkers in the crowd, and they begin booing loudly!

 

“You heard the credentials yourself, Comet,” parrots Riley. “You’re looking at Wrestling’s Superman! How can Birdman and Andrea Montgomery possibly hope to overcome this team?” Connelly walks over to the edge of the ring as King approaches and sits down on the middle rope, pushing the top rope up as she does so in order to create an opening for her man. The Icon instructs her to allow Hunt into the ring as well, and then dismisses her to the outside, but not before permitting her to massage his chest. Connelly then gives King a good-luck kiss before exiting the ring as “Superstar” fades into the ether.

 

“Max King and Martin Hunt definitely appear to be confident,” notes Comet, “but they’re going to have to put on their track shoes if they want to keep up with their opponents here tonight!” Comet’s voice trails off as the lights in the Garden dim just before…

 

BOOM!

 

Columns of green pyro engulf the stage in conjunction to a sudden wave of green light flooding the Garden as No Doubt’s “Just a Girl” begins to play:

 

“Take this pink ribbon off my eyes,

I'm exposed,

And it's no big surprise.

Don't you think I know

Exactly where I stand?

This world is forcing me

To hold your hand…”

 

And, as the music begins to pick up in intensity, Andrea Montgomery and the Birdman run out onto the stage, each one running to one corner as they gesture to the fans to start cheering!

 

“'Cause I'm just a girl, little 'ol me,

Don't let me out of your sight.

I'm just a girl, all pretty and petite,

So don't let me have any rights.”

 

“Their opponents,” says Funyon, as he recovers his microphone, “at a total combined weight of three hundred sixty-two pounds, the Birdman, and his partner… AAAAANDREA MONTGOMERY!” Birdman and Drea jog down the ramp, high-fiving the fans surrounding the barricade as the approach ringside. They make it to the ring and slide underneath the bottom rope, before popping back to their feet and climbing onto opposing turnbuckles.

 

“Andrea Montgomery and the Birdman,” repeats Comet. “Two of the premier high-flyers in the SWF today! They’ll definitely have their hands full if they want to get that title shot!” King and Hunt discuss strategy as Drea and the Birdman are posing for the fans, and then decide to jumpstart the match without waiting for the bell, each of them running towards one of their opponents to sneak attack them in the corner, but Birdman and Drea both see their adversaries coming and flip backwards off of the corner, landing on their feet behind their larger foes!

 

“Looks like Max King and Martin Hunt wanted to this match off to an early start,” says Comet, “but Drea and the Birdman have evaded their dastardly tactics!”

 

DING! DING! DING!

 

Referee Anthony Michael Hall orders the timekeeper to ring the bell as Big Country and the Icon turn their attention back towards the ring and resume their pursuit of their rivals, but Birdman and Drea both leap over the top rope down to the arena floor. King and Hunt give chase, sliding underneath the bottom rope out of the ring as they run after Drea and Birdman.

 

“Well, so far, Citizen Drea and Birdman are being very smart,” notes Comet. “They’ve succeeded in using their speed to their advantage, getting King and Hunt to chase them around!” Drea and Birdman slide back into the ring and wait for King and Hunt to climb back on the apron before turning into the aggressors, charging towards Big Country and the Icon! Birdman nails the Superman with a back elbow that doesn’t quite knock him off the apron, as Drea blasts Hunt with a running dropkick that sends him all the way back to the arena floor!

 

The crowd begins to applaud the actions of Drea and Birdman as they meet in their corner for a quick strategy session.

 

“It looks like Andrea is going to start the match off against ‘The Icon’ Max King,” notes Comet. “That’s probably sound strategy; lead off with the more experienced of the two.”

 

“Absolutely,” agrees Riley. “And I’ll tell you something else, Comet: the way I look at this match is, the longer it goes, the better it is for Birdman and Montgomery; they’ve got the speed and the stamina advantage. Martin Hunt and the Icon are going to want to use their power and put this one away quickly!”

 

Andrea and Max King circle each other before locking up in the center of the ring. Drea quickly slaps on a front facelock, but the Icon lifts her off the mat with ease, carrying her all the way to the corner and placing her on the top turnbuckle. Referee Hall calls for the break and gets it, but not before the Superman gives Drea a slap across the face!

 

BOOOOOO!

 

“How dare he,” roars Comet. “What an ungentlemanly action!”

 

“Hey,” counters Riley, “don’t be so hard on him. He’s just trying to put her in her place!” Birdman runs across the apron and takes a swipe at King, who then turns his attention towards the Bird…

 

 

SOCK!

 

 

… Giving Andrea just enough time to leap off the turnbuckles and blast King in the back of the head with a missile dropkick!

 

“Looks like she just put HIM in his place, instead,” mocks Comet. The Icon stumbles into our hero’s corner and right into a hard right hand from the Birdman! Andrea sneaks up behind King as he staggers backwards and takes him over into a schoolboy pin!

 

 

ONE!

 

 

But Drea only gets as far as a one-count before the Icon powers out with ease. Still, Drea beats him to his feet and pushes him up against the ropes. She grabs him by the wrist and whips him across the ring, but the Superman easily reverses the attempt. Drea runs underneath a clothesline attempt as she bounces off the ropes and then leapfrogs over a ducking King as she rebounds a second time. Instead of going to the ropes a third time, however, she runs towards the heel corner and catches Big Country zoning out…

 

SMACK!

 

 

… And nails him with a back elbow that sends him reeling on the apron! “Andrea using her speed to get away from the Icon,” says Comet, “and then nails Martin Hunt, who was daydreaming on the apron!”

 

“And that was a cheap shot,” shouts Riley. “Hall should disqualify her right now, and award this match to King and Hunt!”

 

“Be serious for a minute,” scolds Comet. “You’ve been in the ring before, and you have enough experience to know that you need to pay attention at all times, even if you’re just on the apron waiting for a tag!”

 

“I’m sure that Martin Hunt expected a little more sportsmanship on the part of Montgomery,” counters Riley. Furious, Hunt leans over the ropes, demanding a tag from King, as Andrea hustles back over to her corner and confirms the game plan with her partner.

 

“I dunno,” says Comet. “I thought that it was quite a heads-up decision by Citizen Montgomery.”

 

Riley looks at Comet incredulously. “Hitting the guy who’s not legally in the ring?”

 

“I’m sure that she was just trying to get Big Country’s attention,” says Comet with a shrug, as King makes the tag to Hunt, who steps into the ring fuming, as he gets ready to mangle Andrea. “You know, make him burn up some more energy.”

 

“I don’t think I’d WANT this guy’s attention,” replies Riley, as Big Country locks up with Drea. “I think I would have left him daydreaming!” Drea grabs Hunt’s right arm and twists it into an armbar before leaning back into her corner and making the tag to Birdman. The Bird rushes into the ring and takes over the armbar, giving it one good twist before quickly tagging Andrea back in. Montgomery climbs to the top rope and comes off with a double axe-handle to the shoulder! She takes control of Hunt’s arm again and gives it one good twist before tagging back out to Birdman.

 

“Andrea Montgomery and the Birdman are going to work on Martin Hunt with frequent tags,” notes Comet, as the Bird steps back into the ring and drills Hunt in the shoulder with a high kick before returning to the arm wringer.

 

“They appear to have isolated ‘Big Country’ Hunt, which you have to believe is a sound strategy,” concedes Riley. “They’ve got a hold of a body part, and they’re trying to take it away from Hunt; they want to neutralize his strength advantage, which is pretty smart.” Hunt grabs Birdman by the back of the head and backs him into a neutral corner, where he punches him in the head with his free hand, forcing him to release the armbar. Big Country grabs Birdman by the wrist and whips him across the ring to the opposite corner and runs in after him, but the Bird moves out of the way, causing Hunt to crash into the corner shoulder-first. Birdman puts Hunt on the mat with an armdrag takeover and re-applies the armbar as he gestures to his partner.

 

“Big Country with a miss in the corner, and allows Citizen Birdman to go right back into the armbar,” says Comet, as Andrea jumps over the top rope and streaks across the ring in a blur, blasting an unsuspecting Max King in the face with a running forearm smash before referee Hall realizes that she’s even in the ring! Hall looks up just as Drea races back towards her corner to see the Icon trying to come into the ring, and immediately moves to stop him. As the referee orders King back to his corner against the Icon’s protests, Drea and Birdman go back to work on Big Country; Drea grabs Martin’s hand and slides out of the ring, holding his arm in place as Birdman runs to the ropes and jumps into the air as he bounces off, crashing into Hunt’s shoulder with a flying splash!

 

“Andrea and Birdman have effectively cut the ring in half, and are really going to work on that arm,” says Comet. “His strength advantage has been totally taken away by their effective double teaming!”

 

“Illegal double teaming, I’d like to add,” quips Riley angrily. “It was a dirty trick on the part of Andrea Montgomery to goad the Icon into the ring! But, I will give them their due: that’s what they’re going to have to do if they want to beat these two guys, and so far, they’ve been successful in dictating the pace of this match!” Birdman re-asserts the armbar and makes the tag back to Andrea. The Wild Card grabs Hunt by the wrist and whips him towards the ropes, easily reversed by Big Country. Drea runs over the top of Hunt, who drops down to the mat as she bounces off the ropes…

 

CRASH!

 

But spills out of the arena to the floor when the Icon grabs onto the top rope just as she prepares to rebound off the ropes a second time!

 

“What a heinous maneuver by that fiend Max King,” roars Comet. Big Country distracts both Birdman and the referee as the Icon and Kelly Connelly begin working on Andrea outside the ring.

 

“That’s called smarts, Comet,” replies Riley. “The Icon took the initiative to regain the momentum in this match. That’s why he’s the captain of this team!”

 

After several stomps from King and Kelly, the Icon pulls Andrea to her feet, slams her head against the ring apron and rolls her back inside the ring. Martin Hunt calmly walks over, picks Montgomery up by the hair and shoves her into his corner. He unleashes a barrage of punches to the cruiser, prompting Hall to interject himself, informing Big Country that strikes with closed fists are not allowed. Hunt backs off, feigning innocence, allowing the Icon to grab Andrea’s head, dragging her face-first on the ring ropes. Temporarily blinded, Andrea stumbles backwards, catching a stiff forearm to the jaw from King.

 

“And more cheating from the team of Martin Hunt and Max King! This is most unjust!” Comet exclaims.

 

“Come on, Comet. King and Hunt are just repaying Birdman and Andrea Montgomery back for the double-teaming they were subject to. Everything must balance out,” Riley explains confidently.

 

Hunt spins on his heel and drops an elbow across the chest of the downed Mississippian and stays down for a pin attempt.

 

ONE!

 

TW...NO!

 

Andrea manages to get a shoulder up, and Hunt is furious over this fact. Big Country pulls Andrea to her feet, slaps on a front facelock, grabs the waistband of Andrea’s pants and hoists her in the air. Hunt slowly turns around the ring, suspending Drea in the air in a display of his power. He finally faces Birdman, lets go of Andrea’s waistband and flips him off!

 

“Martin Hunt showing an obvious disrespect for his opponents with that action! Such things should not be allowed. It is very offensive.” Comet says prudishly.

 

“Comet, you’ve got to get out more often. This is two thousand and four. I mean, flipping someone off is pretty common these days. Everyone’s doing it.” Riley says.

 

Birdman appears to have the same sentiments as Comet, as he quickly pulls himself onto the top rope and leaps towards Hunt, nailing Big Country with a springboard dropkick! However, the dropkick, along with bringing Hunt to the mat, also caused Andrea to practically be hit with a suspended suplex. Hall confronts Birdman about entering the ring without being tagged in, which allows Max King to get into the ring, pull Andrea to her feet…

 

 

WHAM!

 

 

… And slam her back to the mat with a powerbomb.

 

BOOOOOO!!

 

The crowd erupts at the blatant act of cheating by King, as does Birdman, but after his attempt to attack the Icon, Hall steps in his path again, warning him once more about being in the ring illegally.

 

“Citizen Hall is oblivious to the cheating from the Icon! I cannot believe this. The Birdman simply wishes to help out Citizen Montgomery, but he is being prevented by the one person whose job it is to protect the wrestlers from cheating, referee Hall!” exclaims Comet.

 

“Shut up, Comet. This is sweet! That Hawkman rip-off and that, uh… Andrea Montgomery… are being shown a lesson. And that lesson is evil will always triumph, because good is stupid!”

 

“Any more lines from Spaceballs you want to steal? Going to mention something about Andrea and Birdman moving at ludicrous speed?” Comet asks

 

Birdman finally retreats back outside the ring, allowing Hall to turn his attention back to the match. Big Country lifts Andrea to her feet and whips her into the ropes, ducking down as she comes off the rebound. Even as dazed as she is, Andrea sees the move coming miles away and leaps into the air as she bounces off the ropes, nailing Hunt with a dropkick to the top of his head! Hunt stumbles backwards towards the edge of the ring, right into a kick to the back from Birdman! With a sudden burst of adrenaline, Andrea kips up and shakes her head, trying to clear the cobwebs. Hunt clutches his back in pain as he staggers back towards the center of the ring…

 

 

THWACK!

 

 

… And walks right into a leg lariat from Drea! Andrea rolls over and gets to her knees, crawling towards her corner to make the tag. Big Country grasps desperately at Andrea’s ankle to keep her from reaching her corner…

 

 

TAG!

 

… But Andrea is still able to reach the outstretched hand of the Birdman, who immediately leaps to the top turnbuckle…

 

SPLASH!

 

… And soars fearlessly off the top rope, crashing down on top of Hunt with a senton swan dive and staying down for the pin!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

T...NO!

 

But Hunt still kicks out easily, sending Birdman up in the air.

 

“Martin Hunt avoids what would have possibly been considered a minor upset,” says Comet.

 

“Hah,” snorts Riley. “Big Country was about four feet from a pin, Comet. But, even so, he needs to try to tag in to Max King as soon as possible!” Hunt pulls himself up is met by a waiting Birdman. Birdman lunges forward, lashing out a kick to Big Country’s head, but Hunt grabs Birdman’s leg and kicks him in the hamstring. Martin lets go of Birdman’s leg and suddenly bursts forward…

 

 

BAM!

 

 

… Leveling him with a clothesline! Hunt then begins stomping Birdman before tagging in Max King. Big Country and the Icon pull Birdman up, apply a double front facelock, and send Birdman crashing into the mat with a double suplex! Hall admonishes Hunt, forcing him to exit the ring and wait on the apron. King lifts Birdman to his feet and then whips him into the ropes…

 

SMACK!

 

… And Birdman does a SICK flip after being nailed in the face with a back elbow from the Icon. King simply drops down in a lateral press:

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

TH...NO!

 

Birdman manages to get a shoulder up. The Icon sits up on his knees, hammering Birdman’s chest with several clubbing forearms before making another pin attempt:

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THRE...NO!

 

Birdman manages another kickout by the slimmest of margins.

 

“Max King is visibly frustrated at Birdman’s ability to kick out. He should perhaps try to hit a stronger move before making a pinning attempt,” Comet muses.

 

“Yeah, right. Like it’ll take something as devastating as the King Buster to put the feather bag away? If the Icon hit that, he’d be arrested for attempted murder. Well, at the very least, PETA would be pissed as hell.” Riley says, laughing at his own joke since nobody else will.

 

The Icon lifts Birdman to his feet and locks on a front chancery. He quickly lifts Birdman up and drops him with a suplex. King isn’t done, however, as he rolls over, stands up, and drops Birdman with a DDT. The Icon still is not finished, as he rolls through again and delivers a spinning neckbreaker to the Birdman, floating over for the pin attempt.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

SPLASH!

 

Andrea Montgomery flies off the top rope, landing on King, thus breaking up the pin!

 

“Andrea Montgomery has just saved the Birdman with that springboard splash! Without that, the match would have gone to ‘the Icon’ Max King and Martin ‘Big Country’ Hunt,” exclaims Comet. “But, can he make the tag?”

 

“I have to agree with you on a few points, Comet,” states Riley. “Firstly, yes, if Montgomery hadn’t interfered, Max King and Martin Hunt would be tag title contenders. Secondly, Birdman is definitely spent; he’s taken a lot of punishment in a short amount of time… but even if he makes the tag, there’s no way that Andrea and Birdman can pull this out, short of King and Hunt spontaneously combusting right here!”

 

King stands up, enraged over Andrea breaking up the pin and charges after her. Before he can land a blow, referee Hall steps in front of the Icon, trying to get Andrea back to her corner himself. King follows behind Hall, yelling and gesturing towards Andrea. Just as she’s about to exit the ring, she points over Hall’s shoulder, causing the referee to spin around and sidestep King, looking for whatever it is Drea claims to have seen. The Icon turns his head, too, giving Andrea the opportunity to hop to the top turnbuckle and jump off…

 

WHACK!

 

… Hitting Max King in the stomach with a dropkick, doubling him over! By the time Hall realizes that he’s been duped, Andrea already has King in a side headlock and she scales the ropes and leaps over, draping King throat-first across the top strand.

 

“Andrea Montgomery has helped turned the tide in her and Birdman’s favor even more with that bulldog hangman! Now if only Birdman would get up and tag in Andrea, they could take full control of this match!” Comet exclaims, very excited.

 

“Hall should disqualify them,” shrieks Riley. “That was rampant cheating by Montgomery! This match should be awarded to King and Hunt!”

 

Andrea’s attacks provide Birdman time to recuperate, and he manages to pull himself to his feet via the ropes. Leaning heavily against them, Birdman makes his way around the ring towards Andrea’s outstretched arm. Just as Birdman gets close to Andrea, King staggers to his feet and drills an elbow into Birdman’s back, but pushes the Bird into the corner, and he just manages to graze Andrea’s hand for the tag! As Birdman falls to the mat, Andrea leaps in, connecting with a missile dropkick to the Icon! Max staggers backwards and his face is introduced to the sole of Andrea’s boot, dazing him further. Montgomery quickly applies an arm wringer and simultaneously kicks out King’s legs and drives her elbow into his neck…

 

BANG!

 

“The Magnolia Bloom! Andrea Montgomery might have just changed the outcome of this match,” shrills Comet. Andrea kips up to her feet and runs to the ropes, bouncing off and crashing down on the Icon with a front flip senton! Andrea rolls King over and hooks his right leg!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

TH...NO!

 

King kicks out, and Andrea goes flying, but she gets to her feet first and smacks King with a spin kick to the temple as he is still in a kneeling position! Andrea uses this opportunity to hop onto the top rope, take several steps before sliding and leaping off…

 

CRACK!

 

… Knocking the Icon down with a roundhouse! Instead of attempting a pin attempt, however, Andrea gets to her feet, heads to a set of ropes near the King/Hunt corner, and leaps off without warning, scissoring an unsuspecting Martin Hunt’s neck and spinning around before dumping him to the floor! Andrea manages to release Big Country before he tumbles, and she pulls herself up on the apron before hopping onto the top turnbuckle and leaping off…

 

 

CRASH!

 

 

… Twisting in midair as she hits a corkscrew moonsault on Max King!

 

“Sweet sassy mo... wait, I’m not Ray Romano, and this isn’t a Saturday Night Live skit, parodying Sportscenter,” says Comet, trying desperately to regain his train of thought. Anyway, Andrea is on fire! She’s been all over the place!”

 

“That’s amateur stuff,” scoffs Riley. “I remember Janus doing that at least half a dozen times in a match.” Andrea rolls over and makes a lateral press.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THREE...NO!

 

King manages to get a shoulder up! Frustrated, Andrea walks over to Birdman and they quickly hatch a plan. Andrea pulls the Icon to his feet, whips him into the ropes while heading towards the opposite set, executing a forward roll once off the rebound. Drea springs to her feet, cradles King’s head and drops down with a jawbreaker! She rises and quickly tags in Birdman. The two lift up the Icon, push him into their corner and whip him across the ring into his corner. King staggers out of the corner, and Birdman perches on the top turnbuckle as Andrea runs towards the Icon. Drea plants her feet into King’s stomach, grabs the back of his neck and sends him to the mat with a monkey flip! Andrea kips up and runs towards the heel’s corner and dives over the top rope, knocking Big Country down to the floor, as Birdman stretches out his arms, lets out a ‘CAW! CAW!’ as he leaps off…

 

 

SPLAT!

 

… Landing atop Max King with the Bird Dropping! Hall quickly straightens things out in his mind and drops down to make the count.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!!

 

THREE!!!

 

DING! DING! DING!

 

“Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of this match and number one contenders to the tag team championship, AAAANDREAAAA MONTGOMERRRRY AND THE BIIIIIIIRRDMAAAAAAN!!!” Funyon exclaims as “Let’s Get Retarded” plays over the speakers. Andrea rolls into the ring, looking worse the wear after her suicide dive to stop Martin Hunt from breaking up Birdman’s pin. Her and Birdman celebrate in the ring, but notice King and Hunt slowly getting up. The new contenders quickly exit the ring and make their way up the ramp, slapping hands with fans.

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Guest Suicide King

Coming back off a quick commercial break, the Lockdown cameras zoom through the arena catching the fans in the stands trying to make the best impression in their fleeting moments on television. Waving their signs and jumping up and down, a whole row of fans catch the attention of the camera. In big, white cardboard letters the word "Toxic" is spelt out. Apparently the second X has decided to stay home or take a restroom break.

 

"... so that's when I found out how quickly egg salad could indeed spoil." Riley chimes in.

 

"Did you see that? Those fans can't even spell Toxxic." Comet quips.

 

"What a bunch of... and we're back on the air! Welcome back to Lockdown, live from the historic Madison Square Garden in New York City, the capital of Western civilization!" Riley tries to cover their startled return.

 

"Right you are, Bobbo. We are indeed in Madison Square Garden."

 

"That's all you've got, Comet?"

 

"Indeed it is. On with the match!" Comet commands.

 

Carry on my wayward son…

There’ll be peace when you are done

Lay your weary head to rest

Don’t you cry no more…

 

BOOOOOOM!!!

 

As the opening guitar riffs of “Carry On Wayward Son” by Kansas blare throughout the arena, two large green flares shoot high into the air from either side of the entranceway, bringing Alan out from behind the curtain and into the spotlight. Alan stands there, frozen with his head down, as Funyon makes the announcement.

 

"Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is a battle royale for the number one contendership to the Cruiserweight Championship! Competitors are eliminated when they are thrown over the top rope and both feet touch the floor outside of the ring. Making his way to the ring first from Long Beach, California, weighing in at two hundred and twenty-five pounds, he is the leader of The Wayward Sons... Alaaaaaaan Claaaaaaaark!"

 

Once I rose above the noise and confusion

Just to get a glimpse beyond this illusion

I was soaring ever higher

But I flew too high

 

As the lyrics begin again, Alan takes a slow, methodical walk to the ring, passing by the fans and slapping a few hands before climbing up the ring steps and into the ring. He stands on the far side of the ring; waiting for his next opponent and sharing a few words with referee Sexton Hardcastle.

 

The house lights drop, causing a small mummer to escape from the crowd. The low key, but upbeat beginning of "Lapdance" by N.E.R.D. starts to fill the arena. Brilliant strobes of white, yellow, blue and red, flash about the arena, bathing the crowd in a multicolored hue in time with the beat, whose moderate base line begins to kick up, until, the vocals drop...

 

I'm an Ouuuuut-law!

 

A bullet flies through the picture suddenly causing the image to shatter like glass. A single spotlight flashes across the stage, waving back and forth in time with the hip-hop beat...

 

Quick on the draw -- Quick on the draw...

Something you never seen before -- never seen...

 

Centering on a lone spot...

 

And I dare a muthafucker to come in my face!

 

As N.E.R.D’S “Lap-dance” continues, it draws Ryan Dustin to the stage, through the curtain to face the crowd – arms folded across his chest – while in a casual lean; his red cameo jacket fluttering from an unknown undercurrent. After a pause, Dustin makes his way to the ring, interacting with various fans by placing them in his 'picture frame'...

 

"And his first opponent," adds Funyon, "Making his way to ring from Carson City, Nevada, weighing in at two hundred and twenty-eight pounds, he is 'the Real Deal'... Ryaaaaaan Duuustiiiiiiiiin!"

 

Ryan reaches the ring and climbs up the outside of the turnbuckle to pose once again, sizing up Alan Clark by placing his hands in the form of a 'picture frame' again. Then Ryan, as if waiting for a cue, turns to the near side crowd while nodding his head to the beat...

 

It's so real!

How I feel!

 

... and flips backwards over the top rope and into the ring! A small cheer goes up from the crowd to acknowledge this feat. Ryan walks over and shakes Alan's hand in a show of mutual respect. The two sit and wait for the next person to enter.

 

"We've got two outstanding cruiserweights out here in Citizens Dustin and Clark, and if I'm not mistaken we're now waiting for none other than the former Cruiserweight Champion, Citizen Sly."

 

"Right you are, Comet. I'm going to go ahead and make him my early pick to win this match! And here he comes!"

 

The arena lights dim to a cool, dark shade of blue signaling the imminent arrival of the now former Cruiserweight champion. The sound of an acoustic guitar playing a hard, driving riff floats out over the arena, but it is almost completely smothered by the fans showing their utter loathe for the man who's presence they will soon be in. Austin Sly emerges from behind the curtains with only a slight cocky smirk to show any emotion on his face. He makes his way to the edge of the stage to do his pre-match stretches before NTD ever appears from the curtains behind him, pantsless as always. Austin turns to share a glance and smile towards his mentor before they both make their way towards the ring. Funyon makes the announcement.

 

"Making his way to the ring from St. Louis, Missouri, weighing in at two hundred and thirty pounds; being accompanied to the ring by Smarks Wrestling Federation legend NTD! He is... Auuuustiiiiiiiin Slyyyyyy!"

 

The duo pause at ringside, taking the opportunity to have one last talk before Austin has to step into the ring. During the exchange, Sly motions for his mentor to return to the backstage area. NTD obliges for his friend with only a little hesitance. Austin then turns and stretches his arms across his chest before motioning that he would be rolling into the ring underneath the bottom rope. He thinks twice about it though, and decides to remain on the outside looking in at the more than prepared Alan Clark and Ryan Dustin. Austin paces outside of the ring obviously waiting on the fourth member of the match. The fans at ringside try to encourage him to climb in, but their pleas fall upon deaf ears.

 

"Serial Thrilla" by Prodigy filters into the Garden announcing the arrival of none other than Rob Gilbert. The Lady-Thrilla walks threw the curtain flanked by his trainer Timothy Valentine. The duo stops at the top of the ramp for a second as Funyon introduces them.

 

"Introducing the last participant in this battle royale! Making his way to the ring from Kennebuckport, Maine, weighing in at one hundred and sixty-five pounds; accompanied to the ring by Timothy Valentine! He is... Roooob Giiilbeeeeeert!"

 

Rob and Timothy arrive at ringside beside Austin Sly. The trio shares a few words before Austin convinces Timothy to circle around to the other side of the ring. Now a duo, Austin and Rob stand looking into the ring at Ryan and Alan who are both motioning for the two to join them inside. The two talk a bit more before deciding that they should just charge into the ring swinging in order to have a chance. The two break out of their mini-huddle to charge into the ring!

 

Smack!

 

Rob gets leveled with a spinning heel kick from Alan Clark as he come charging into the ring. He recovers quickly and climbs back to his feet only to get his arms caught by Ryan Dustin. Austin, however, still stands on the outside of the ring just watching and scratching his head with a curious look on his face. Inside the ring, Rob does his best to try and hold his own with two men, but it's hard to fight back when your arms are being held behind you in a full nelson while another man uses your stomach for a sparring bag. Referee Hardcastle tries to discourage the double team, but it's ignored by all participants. Austin slowly climbs into the ring while the trio is distracted, but he gathers notice from Sexton who promptly calls for the opening bell.

 

Ding ding ding!

 

"Citizen Sly enters into the ring and we finally have an official match on our hands!" Comet notes.

 

"It looks to me like Austin is coming in to bail Rob out from this trap that was laid by Ryan Dustin and Alan Clark!" Riley pauses; "the two should be ashamed of their selves for catching someone like that! It's unfair to everyone involved!"

 

"Citizen Gilbert wouldn't be in this mess if he hadn't trusted the former champ in the first place!"

 

Rob catches a chance to retaliate against Alan when the man formerly known as Bloodshed catches sight of Austin out of the corner of his eye. Rob's foot goes soaring into the nether regions of Alan's anatomy causing him to buckle down onto the mat. Ryan begins to lean back in his full nelson and lift the much lighter Rob Gilbert up off the mat, but Ryan comes crashing down to the mat when his legs are knocked out from under him by a shoulder block from Austin Sly. Both men topple down to the mat, but Rob is quickly back to his feet. With Alan still immobile on the mat, the duo of Rob and Austin begin pummeling Ryan Dustin hoping to gather an early elimination.

 

"This is better, wouldn't you say Comet?"

 

"You're a confusing man, Bobbo." Comet replies, "one moment you're upset by the fact that Citizens Dustin and Clark were double teaming Rob Gilbert, the next moment you're praising the fact that Citizens Sly and Gilbert are laying waste to Ryan Dustin!"

 

"What's good for the goose is... um... good for the goose, Comet."

 

"That doesn't even make sense."

 

Austin signals for Rob to back off before he pulls Ryan back to his feet. By this time, Clark has begun to climb back to his feet, but he's caught off guard though when he's met with a spinning elbow to his face. Rob sends another Discus Elbow soaring into Alan's face, knocking him further off tilt. Meanwhile, Austin is readily busy making Ryan spend more time on the mat than on his feet keeping him grounded with repeated clotheslines. Dustin climbs to his feet again, this time to receive a foot to the gut and a Double Arm DDT. Rob signals for Austin's attention, and draws him over to beside where Alan now leans on the ropes.

 

"This has become more of a tornado tag team match than a battle royale! I wouldn't trust Citizen Sly to stick with this team for long, though." Comet warns.

 

Austin takes Alan's right arm and places it behind his head while Rob makes a similar motion with Alan's left arm. Both men grab a hold of Alan's pants to use as leverage as they lift him into the air. They stall in air for a moment before slamming the now helpless opponent back onto the mat. "Ahhhh!" Alan lets out a small yelp as he arches his back off the mat in pain, only to rest back onto it. Both Austin and Rob climb back to their feet and look at Clark as he lies on his back. Rob goes to crouch down on top of the fallen Wayward Son, only to be blindsided by Austin Sly. Gilbert goes tumbling but is quickly back on his feet only to be blindsided with a high knee from the charging Sly. Rob wobbles backwards into the ropes with Austin following him closely. Austin quickly begins firing right hand after right hand into Rob's face while the Lady-Thrilla simply tries to block his face. Behind the duo on the opposite side of the ring stands a recharged Ryan Dustin, waiting for his most opportune moment. Ryan finds that time, and seizes the chance by charging across the ring! The sound of the Real Deal stampeding across the ring gathers to attention of both Robzilla and Sly as they both duck out of his way. Austin finds this to be his opportune time though as he side steps Dustin and adds some of his own force to toss him up and over the top rope. Ryan lands on the outside of the ring without ever realizing what has just occurred.

 

"It looks like Citizen Dustin is the first out of this match tonight! It's too bad, though. After losing his Hardcore Gamers title last week, it would have been a nice touch to win a chance at a different title this week." Comet announces with a sad tone in his voice.

 

"Cheer up emo kid, it's only Ryan Dustin!" Riley mocks his announcing partner.

 

Austin dashes across the ring and bounces off the ropes before charging towards the spot where Ryan was just eliminated. Sly baseball slides underneath the bottom rope and out of the ring taking down the Real Deal once again. Dustin is quick to his feet though and the two begin brawling outside of the ring, fist flying everywhere. In the ring, Alan Clark has now fully recovered and is back up and brawling with Rob Gilbert. Rob lifts his knee into Alan's midsection causing him to fold over before latching a headlock on.

 

"That's how fast a match's pace can change here in the SWF!" Comet shouts, "one second ago we were watching Citizen Sly terrorize everyone in the ring, and now we're down to Citizens Clark and Gilbert left in the match!"

 

"What a strange turn of events..." Riley mumbles.

 

Alan tries to shove his head free of Rob's hands again as he climbs back to his feet. Clark quickly shifts his attention to freeing himself the only other way he knows how... by fighting out! Alan fires an elbow into the midsection of the challenger, but it has little effect but to raise Gilbert's determination. Clark draws his elbow back again and begins firing it into the Lady-Thrilla at a much faster pace. One, two, three, four - Rob's grip loosens. Five, six - he loses his hold! Alan quickly grabs Gilbert's hand and tries to whip him across the ring only to have it reversed! Clark goes bouncing off the ropes and right back into a waiting Robzilla who knocks him down to the mat with a shoulder block. Rob turns and throws his arms into the air, acknowledging this small victory as his own.

 

Meanwhile...

 

On the outside of the ring Ryan has taken almost complete control over Austin Sly, who is now reeling his way back up the ramp trying to escape his pursuer. Dustin catches him about halfway to the stage and sends a thunderous right hand to his face causing him to once again spin around and continue to climb the ramp. Austin flees through the curtain to the back of the arena, closely followed by Ryan.

 

Smack!

 

Dustin is sent scrambling back clutching his head! NTD emerges from the back with a steel chair in hand and his student beside him! Austin takes the chair from NTD's hands and waits for Dustin to climb back to his feet. The former Cruiserweight Champion stalks Dustin... waiting... he, however, settles when it becomes apparent that Dustin wont climb off of his knees, and sends the chair crashing into his skull once again. Ryan falls back onto the ramp as security floods from the back to seperate the two. Austin, with chair in hand, escapes the group leaving NTD to take blame for the mess and makes his way back down towards the ring.

 

"What a heinous attack by both Austin Sly and NTD on Ryan Dustin!" Comet yells out, "the two have no business even being out here, let alone attacking another man! And now Citizen Sly is coming back down to the ring with that steel chair in hand!"

 

"It looks to me like Austin still has anger bottled up after losing his Cruiserweight title to Spike Jenkins! He also felt like he was the number one contender to the Hardcore Gamers title after beating Ryan Dustin, but now he may have lost that chance when Martin Hunt won that title on Storm!"

 

Alan has now taken full control over the match, taking every opportunity to eliminate Rob that he can. With the duo distracted on one side of the ring, Austin enters from the other, still holding the chair. Rob is hung up on the top rope with Alan desperately lifting his legs trying to get him to go over. Finally succeeding, Rob falls from the ring and smacks the mat and is eliminated. Alan lifts his arms to a shower of cheers from the audience, only to receive a chair shot from behind that knocks him down to the mat. The cheers quickly turn to boos as Austin pulls Alan up by his hair with one hand, then clotheslines him over the top rope and out of the ring.

 

Ding ding ding!

 

"Ladies and gentlemen, your winner and new Cruiserweight Championship number one contender, Auuuustiiiiiiiin Slyyyyyy!"

 

"What? Citizen Sly won? But he eliminated himself!" Comet exclaims.

 

"Wrong, Comet... Austin slid under the bottom rope! You must go over the top rope to lose!"

 

The show goes to commercial break with Austin standing in the ring, and Riley chuckling evilly!

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Guest Suicide King

“Welcome back to SWF Lockdown,” greets resident SWF journalist Ben Hardy with a gleaming smile. He stands in front of the Lockdown backdrop, ready to engage in an interview. “Tonight, fans, I am here live with the new SWF Intercontinental-Television Champion, Johnny Dangerous!”

 

He turns to face the Barracuda, who comes into view with a smile that could sell a million movie tickets as the camera zooms out. His dress is the usual “all black casual” wear that we have grown accustomed to seeing, and his newest claim to fame, the Intercontinental-Television Championship, is proudly displayed on his shoulder.

 

“Johnny,” says Ben. “On Storm you managed to do what most here thought you were incapable of doing, which was defeating Landon Maddix for the ICTV Title! Firstly, I must say congratulations--it’s nice to see that belt on one of the boys in blue again. Secondly, how does it feel to have finally see one of the goals you set for yourself become a reality?”

 

“Well, thanks. And to answer your question, it feels great, honestly,” replies Johnny. “Landon Maddix had ran his mouth for some time now; saying that I purposely denied him a shot at the Cruiserweight Championship, and he was going to show the world that my entire reign was a joke. On Storm I proved him wrong. I proved that even with all the cheating and assistance his friends tried to provide that I still came out on top—I still won in spite of it all.”

 

“That sounds quite heroic of you, Johnny,” says Ben.

 

“Real heroic!” a voice rings out from down the hall. Johnny and Ben both turn towards the direction of the voice, and not surprisingly… the voice belongs to Landon Maddix.

 

Johnny quickly removes his shades, fixing his eyeballs on the man he defeated for the ICTV Championship as he casually strolls up, holding a dented steel chair.

 

“A hero that cheats that is,” Landon adds. Johnny furrows his brow from the remark. “You want to claim that you’re out for justice; to undo everything wrong that’s happened? Yet you, Johnny, are guilty of cheating me out of the ICTV Championship… and you KNOW it!”

 

“Landon Maddix.” says Hardy, his voice noticeably shaky as Maddix approaches. “What ar-”

 

“Shut up, Hardy!” growls Landon. He turns his attention towards Johnny and holds up the chair. “Remember this, Johnny!?” he hisses. “This is the exact same chair you used to cheat me out of the ICTV Title! The exact same chair you held over me like a savage… then brutally slammed it across my face!”

 

Johnny simply shrugs in reply. “Maybe next time you shouldn’t bring it into the ring to begin with.” he replies.

 

“F(Beep!)K you, Johnny!” snaps Landon.

 

“Whoa, whoa!” shouts Hardy, standing between both men. “Now, I think there is a decent way we can settle this little disagreement without all these hostilities.”

 

“The only way to settle this is with another match,” says Landon. “Nothing else can solve this. Besides, the way I see it… Johnny owes me a rematch for the Intercontinental-Television Championship, and I want it on Smarkdown!”

 

“Why in the hell would I want another match with you, and especially with the title on the line!?” Johnny quizzically replies. “Not only did I beat you in the stipulation that YOU named, but you’ve already proved that you can’t involve yourself in a fair match! You don’t know how to play by the rules, and I’d much rather have a match with someone who does! So incase you haven’t figured it out yet Mr. La Cucaracha, the answer is no. Not so long as I have anything to say about it!”

 

Landon stares almost in shock, but the shock is quickly absorbed by the rage that starts growing inside Maddix. “I guess…you leave me…no…other…choice!”

 

CRACK!

 

Landon suddenly swings the chair out and SMASHES Johnny’s skull with it, leveling the Barracuda to the ground! Hardy bolts from the scene almost immediately, running away like a dog with his tail tucked between his legs!

 

“SECURITY!” he shouts, as he rounds the corner.

 

However, security is nowhere to be found. Landon kneels down over the Barracuda, growling intently. “You listen, and you listen well, Johnny Dangerous.” he hisses. “You are not going to deny me my rematch like you denied me the chance to ever be Cruiserweight Champion! If you don’t defend, I will make your life a living hell!”

 

With that, Landon rises to his feet and spits on the Barracuda’s face. He turns to walk away, but then stops… and turns back around. “One last thing,” he says, starring down at Johnny, who has yet to move since being pasted with the chair. “Chris Card sends his regards.”

 

CRACK!

 

…and Landon swings the chair down into Johnny’s skull for the second time, and splits his wig! Landon peels the chair from Johnny’s face. It oozes with the sticky red blood. A sight that causes Landon to slightly snicker before turning on his heel and walking off, leaving his victim for the scavengers…

 

 

 

 

As we:

FADE OUT.

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Guest Suicide King

Backstage, Toxxic is watching the proceedings on a monitor while nursing a bottle of water. With the ring empty, Toxxic turns toward the catering table, ready to refill his beverage. There, though, stands Tom Flesher, staring him down.

 

“This isn’t good,” says Comet. “As we know, Tom Flesher and Toxxic haven’t been getting along well lately, and this doesn’t look like an effort to make up.”

 

“Maybe he just wants to give Toxxic a chance to apologize.”

 

“Out of my way,” Toxxic spits. “I don’t need this now any more than you do, sunshine.”

 

“You really need to learn to respect your elders,” Flesher says with a smirk. “Or maybe we need to get Davis to do a little shower-room hazing with you… if he hasn’t already.” With that, Flesher takes a drag off his Camel, then throws it to the ground and grinds it out before blowing a cloud of smoke into Toxxic’s face. Toxxic, unaccustomed to the acrid smoke, coughs, and Flesher whacks him with a backhand.

 

“What’s wrong, boy-o? Can’t you stand a little smoke?” Flesher says with a smirk, before slamming a palm strike into Toxxic’s jaw that snaps his head back. Flesher nails Toxxic again, sending him back into the wall. As the disoriented Manchester native staggers forward, Flesher charges a few steps and hammers him with a Yakuza kick! Toxxic collapses to the floor as Flesher grabs a bottle of Heartland Red Rooster Ale. He takes a swig, then sets it back on the table. Toxxic, for his part, starts to get up off the floor, only to have Flesher nail him in the face with a sitdown dropkick! Flesher backs away, recovering as Toxxic tries to comprehend the onslaught and recoup. As he does, Flesher stands up and grabs him by the waist. Then, he lifts the Straight-Edge Sensation off the floor and, in one fluid movement, drops him onto his neck with the Ego Buster! Toxxic collapses into a heap!

 

“Holy crap!” shouts Riley. “Ego Buster on the floor! Toxxic is NOT getting up from that one!”

 

Flesher, though, sits Toxxic up against the wall. As Toxxic’s head bobs down, Flesher kicks it back and scrapes the sole of his boot across it for good measure! With Toxxic’s head leaning backwards, Flesher grabs his beer off the table.

 

“Oh my…” murmurs Comet. “He wouldn’t!”

 

“Oh, I think he would,” cackles Riley.

 

Flesher, with a smirk, holds Toxxic’s head. “Come on, man, don’t knock it till you try it,” he says, before pouring half the beer into Toxxic’s mouth! The Hot Commodity chokes and sputters, trying to spit out the bitter beverage. Flesher, for his part, pours the rest of the beer over Toxxic’s face and chest, then kicks him in the jaw again.

 

“Enjoy, my man…” says Flesher. “And remember, that beer’s not free. You earned it.”

 

FADE.

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Guest Suicide King

SWF Lockdown is back on the air in three.

 

Two.

 

One.

 

"RRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

 

The atmosphere inside Madison Square Garden is nothing short of incredible as the fans welcome the return of the SWF show. From ringside to rafters, the fans pack the arena with their typical signs, supporting superstars ranging from Alan Clark to the Hell Machine to the Bermani Cross Wizard himself Ced Ordonez. As the camera spirals around the arena and zooms down towards the announce table, both Bobby Riley and Cyclone Comet sit ready to commentate, looking somewhat subdued.

 

"Welcome back to SWF Lockdown, Citizens and fans. I'm CYCLOOOOOOOOONE COMET!"

 

"And I'm Bobby Riley. In a few moments we have another handicap match featuring our World Champion, and we'd just like to direct your attention to the Smarktron."

 

"Last time Citizen Janus had a handicap match, it was against Alan Clark and Edward James..." Comet interjects.

 

---SWF FLASHBACK--

 

The fans begin to boo, as the Hell Machine reaches up and grabs Clark's arms, pulling the smaller half of the Wayward Sons into a familiar position. The crowd hushes as they recognise what the Hell Machine is doing. No one says a word as time seems to slow down, and two words cross everyone's mind as Alan Clark is sent into the canvas.

 

*BAM*

 

Demonstar Driver.

 

---SWF FLASHBACK--

 

"Ced Ordonez and Munich face the Hell Machine shortly, but they're probably just as worried as we are about tonight, Comet."

 

"Amazing that you're serious for once, Robert. Indeed, one has to wonder if Citizen Janus will again pull out the dreaded Demonstar Driver and show no mercy..."

 

"NIGHT OF FIRE!"

 

The sound of Niko's "Night Of Fire" quiets the announcers and pops the crowd, as it announces the arrival of everyone's favourite high-speed dancer. The shadowy form of Ced Ordonez rises from the stage's built in elevator, but none of his accompanying dancers are present - merely his partner for tonight. As the song explodes into full motion and the strobe lights go into overdrive, Ced begins an elaborate dance routine towards the ring, as Munich follows. Despite the energy in Ced's dance and the slight smile on Munich's face, they both know this is going to be deadly serious.

 

"The following contest is a handicap match, scheduled for one fall!" bellows Funyon. "From Sacramento California and Dallas Texas, at five-foot-nine and six-foot-four and a combined four hundred and sixty nine pounds... CED! ORDONEZ! AAAAAAND MUUUUUUUUUUNIIIIIIIIIICH!"

 

Ced dives under the bottom rope and continues his dance routine on the spot, before leaping up on one turnbuckle to pose to the crowd. Munich simply climbs into the ring and lifts his arms to a cheer, and Ced hops off the ropes to discuss tactics with his partner for the night. The strobe lights all drop out, plunging the arena into pitch blackness, as the deep wailing of a siren buzzes over the speakers. The familiar word begins to flash on the Smarktron, slowly coming into full focus as the blue pyrotechnics fountain from the ramp.

 

[sTATUS: RELEASED!]

 

"Consumed with memories...

That preceded today...

Given a chance to bereave...

Life that's slipping AWAAAAAAAAY!"

 

As the sound of Fear Factory's "Resurrection" explodes from the speakers, Funyon lifts his microphone to do the announcements. The spotlights pan the crowd, catching for a moment the monsterous figure easily clambering over the railing. Both Munich and Ced have their eyes on the ramp, and Funyon manages a stunned cry into the microphone as he's pushed aside. In the pitch blackness, the Bemani Cross Wizard lets out a howl of pain, and the referee shouts for the lights to come back up as Munich lets out a similar cry.

 

The lights come back up.

 

The crowd lets the titan in the ring have it.

 

"FUCK YOU, JANUS!"

"FUCK YOU, JANUS!"

"FUCK YOU, JANUS!"

 

For standing in the middle of the ring, as his entrance theme and introductory pyro peter out, is the Hell Machine, resplendent in his white trenchcoat. He holds the Equalizer in both hands, and on the mat, Munich holds his lower back while Ced curls up and clutches his stomach. With a feral grin on his face, the titanic Australian lifts the barbed wire cricket bat high and simply begins to beat the two superstars senseless with it, throwing it aside when he almost mockingly acknowledges the referee's shouts and ringing of the bell.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

Mark Hebner glares at the Hell Machine, who glares back, before reaching down and dragging the battered and barbed-wire-cut forms of Munich and Ced Ordonez upright.

 

Munich takes a Knuckle Bomb to the face that sends him crashing back to the mat.

 

Ced finds himself reeled high into the air and chokeslammed down onto his partner's body.

 

And with a huge elbow drop, Janus falls on them both, looking up at Mark Hebner. The referee almost dares the seven footer to get up and punch him out, but drops down to begrudgingly count.

 

ONE.

...

....

.....

TWO.

...

....

.....

THREE.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

Funyon, still shaken and hunched in the corner of the ring where he was shoved, can't even make the announcement. The crowd simply boos the hell out of Janus, who simply rolls out of the ring and picks up the Equalizer again, propping it over his shoulder. As the crowd continues to boo and Fear Factory's "Resurrection" booms out of the speakers once more, Comet and Riley look at each other in what could only be described as stunned silence.

 

"He..." Riley started.

 

"I know, Robert... I'm beginning to worry for both Citizens Toxxic and Flesher come the Pay Per View."

 

"So am I..." Riley swallows hard.

 

As paramedics come down to check on the battered but clearly still living and breathing forms of Ced Ordonez and Munich, the Hell Machine stalks up the ramp and stops on the stage, glaring around at the fans and then back at the ring. With a sadistic grin a mile wide on his face, Janus thrusts the Equalizer into the air again before we fade to black on those glowing red eyes and that evil smile.

 

For Tom Flesher, he would have no remorse.

 

For Toxxic, there would be no regrets.

 

For both... he would give them...

 

 

 

 

 

No Mercy.

 

***

SWF Lockdown

An Alexander Zenon Production

Smartmarks Wrestling Federation

2004

***

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Guest Suicide King

A good show overall, with the notable exception of Mark Stevens, an infamous cocksmoker you may wish to warn your children about. Look for those matches to be edited in later.

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