Guest Staravenger Report post Posted October 2, 2004 Dark Helmet: Have you found them yet? Radar Man: NO Lord Helmet. They stil aren't on the scanner. Dark Helmet: Well keep looking for them. (sips coffee through mask) Col. Sandurz: Pardon me sir, I have an Idea. Corporal, get me a video cassette of Spaceballs: the Movie. (Mr. Rental opens up, and it features all Mel Brooks movies) Radar Man: The Prducers, Twelve Chairs, Blazing Saddles, Young Frankenstein... Dark Helmet: Col. Sandurz, may I speak with you please? Col. Sandurz: Yes sir? Dark Helmet: How can there be a cassette of Spaceball the movie? We're still in the middle of making it! Col. Sandurz: Thats true sir. But theres been a new breakthrough in home video marketing. Dark Helmet: There has? Col. Sandurz: Yes, instant cassettes. They're out in stores before the movie is finished. Dark Helmet: Nah... Radar Man: Here it is, sir. Spaceballs! Col. Sandurz: Good work Corporal, punch it up. Too early. Prepare to Fast-Forward! Radar Man Preparing to fast forward. Fast forwarding sir! (High-pitched audio and squeaking; shows Helmet start Ludicrous speed) Dark Helmet: No go past this part, in fact, never play this again. (sips coffee) Col. Sandurz: Try here, stop! (shows them all at present time) Dark Helmet: What the hell am I looking at!? When does this happen in the movie? Sandurz: Now. You're looking at now sir. Everything that happens now is happening now. Dark Helmet: What happend to then? Col. Sandurz: We past it Dark Helmet: When? Col. Sandurz: Just now. We're at now now. Dark Helmet: Go back to then. Col. Sandurz: When? Dark Helmet: Now. Col. Sandurz: Now? Dark Helmet: Now. Col. Sandurz: I can't. Dark Helmet: Why? Col. Sandurz: We missed it. Dark Helmet: When? Col. Sandurz: Just now. Dark Helmet: When will then be now? Col. Sandurz: Soon. Dark Helmet: How soon? Radar Man: Sir, I've identified their location. Dark Helmet: Where? Radar Man: Its the moon of Vega. Col. Sandurz: Good work, set a course and prepare for our arrival. Dark Helmet: When!? Radar Man: 19 hundred hours. Col. Sandurz: By high noon tomorrow they will be our prisoners. Dark Helmet: Who!? (mask falls) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest wildpegasus Report post Posted October 2, 2004 Great movie. My favourite lines were around the part where they were talking about ludicrous speed. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anakin Flair 0 Report post Posted October 2, 2004 I just finished watching it today. God, th0at movie is comic GOLD. Lonestar: Great, a Druish princess. Barf: Funny, she doesn't LOOK Druish! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest CronoT Report post Posted October 10, 2004 Druid King: Alright, alright; I'll give you the combination of the airlock. It's 1... Helmut: 1! Col. Sanders: 1! King: 2... Helmut: 2! Sanders: 2! King: 3... Helmut: 3! Sanders: 3! King: 4... Helmut: 4! Sanders: 4! King: 5. Helmut: 5! Sanders: 5! Helmut: So, the combination is 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. What the hell is that? That's the kind of combination an idiot uses on his luggage! (President Scrube enters the room.) Helmut: Sir! We have the combination! Pres. Scrube: Excellent! The combination is 1, 2, 3, 4, 5? That's amazing! I have the same combination on my luggage. (President Scrube leaves the room.) Pres. Scrube: Set course for Druidia! And someone change the combination on my luggage! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
phoenixrising 0 Report post Posted October 10, 2004 Dark Helmet : Before you die there is something you should know about us, Lone Star. Lone Starr : What? Dark Helmet : I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate. Lone Starr : What's that make us? Dark Helmet : Absolutely nothing! Which is what you are about to become. That's my favorite part, I'm always repeating it. That and when Col. Sandurz tells Lord Helmet he didn't see him playing with his dolls again. When Lonestar uses the Schwartz to reverse Megamaid's vaccum: "What's wrong?" "It's Megamaid, sir. She's gone from suck to blow!!" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CBright7831 0 Report post Posted November 13, 2004 Colonel Sanders: Are you alright sir? Dark Helmet: Fine. How have you been? Colonel Sanders: Fine sir. Dark Helmet: Good. Colonel Sanders: It's a good thing you were wearing that helmet. Dark Helmet: Yeah.. Colonel Sanders: What should we do now, sir? Dark Helmet: Well...are we stopped? Colonel Sanders: We're stopped, sir. Dark Helmet: Good. Why don't we take a five minute break? Colonel Sanders: Very good, sir. Dark Helmet: Smoke if you got 'em. *Dark Helmet falls forward to the ground* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Phenom Report post Posted November 13, 2004 Lone Starr: Listen! We're not just doing this for money... We're doing it for a SHIT LOAD of money! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MikeSC Report post Posted November 13, 2004 Lone Star: Great, just what we need. A Druish princess. Barf: Funny, she doesn't look Druish. -=Mike Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
