Tomorrow i'm free

[Guest carnage]

30September2004

 

Today is a good day.

I think I will go to bed early today because I want to wake up early tomorrow morning. I am looking foreword to tomorrow because that will be a special day. That will be the day I am released from this place. Tomorrow morning my special new friend will come and sign the paper work and I will be allowed to leave this place. That will make me happy.

I can’t wait to go to Los Angeles. I have never been allowed to travel but I am very excited about going on the plane ride to California. I hope there are no terrorists on the plane because that might make me nervous. I’m not much fun to be around when I’m nervous. I’m not responsible for my actions when people make me nervous.

I’m going to SWF Smarkdown at the Staples Center on October 4th. Staples Center is a funny name for an arena. I broke my head two years ago and the doctors here put staples in it to fix it. I don’t know why they would name an arena after staples. I remember there was a staples gun at the nurses’ station I used to take and put staples in the nurses I didn’t like. I remember that used to make them very mad at me so I don’t think they would name a building after those staples.

I’m babbling again.

At SWF Smarkdown I will finally get to wrestle. I am very excited. I am going to wrestle a man named rKade. I like the rkade. I used to go when I was a little boy. I played a lot of games and they gave me candy there. I always had a lot of fun at the rkade.

I know I am going to have a lot of fun with this rkade as well. I have been sitting in the shadows here for nine years waiting for this day. I have nine years of rage waiting to be released on October 4. rKade will be the unlucky recipient of that rage. I think he is going to have a very bad trip to Los Angeles.

I wonder if they will let me bring my bat with me to Los Angeles. My opponent rKade is 350 pounds and I wonder what his fat looks like. If I bring me bat I can slice him open and find out. That would be fun. They say the intestines are over a mile long. I wonder if rKade's intestines are that long. If I can slice him open I can pull them out and find out. That would be more than fun. That would be cool.

I better go to sleep now and not think about what I am going to do to rKade. The nurses are walking by my room and they keep on looking in. I hate those nurses. They are all old and fat and look like Rosanne. I don’t like Rosanne. She annoys me.

When I watch TV all the nurses are pretty but all the nurses in this place look like Rosanne. Maybe they don’t pay the nurses much here. I hate cheap people.

I can hear the med cart coming now. That’s Sheila. She looks the most like Rosanne. I hate her most of all. I wish I was going to wrestle her instead of rKade.

They are going to give me my medication to sleep. I’m sure I will sleep very well tonight. Tomorrow I am going to leave this place. I will not miss it at all.

Just one more night in the darkness. Tomorrow I will be free

[Toxxic 0]

Ok. The first two Carnage promos had bolding and italics and colour in... well, at least places that VAGUELY made sense. This one is just bonkers.

 

And yet... I like it. So cheesy it's actually quite fun.