Another Random Match

[Guest Holzhammer]

I was asked to write this match for someone's fantasy federation. I'm not exactly a huge fan of The Rock's in-ring abilities so I had trouble writing a good match with him. Oh well... Enjoy!

 

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*Here Comes The Pain!*

 

The crowd flares up and starts booing their lungs out when they hear that music. The curtain that separates the backstage area from the arena gets ripped aside and The Next Big Thing, Brock Lesnar, walks out. He looks pumped. The fans pour even more heat on the behemoth when they see him, but Lesnar doesn’t care. He jumps from one foot to the other as he stares at the steel ramp, focusing on the upcoming battle.

 

DiBiase:B “Look at that man. He’s ready to rip The Rock apart!”

 

JR- “Well, I can’t say I envy The Rock for being in that ring tonight. That’s for sure.”

 

Lesnar walks down to the ring. The cage is still hanging a few feet above the top rope. Lesnar arrives at ringside and looks from left to right, throwing an intense scowl at the crowd. He suddenly jumps on the apron and pulls the top rope. Bam! White-hot pyros shoot up into the air from the four turnbuckles like flak. The fans keep booing Lesnar. He doesn’t seem to care. He enters the ring and paces around, awaiting his opponent. The cage gets lowered around him, trapping him inside. Comparing Brock Lesnar with a caged, enraged animal isn’t out of place now.

 

*If You Smeeellllll... What The Rock... Is Cooking.*

 

The loud jeers turn into deafening cheers. The Rock walks out from the back almost immediately and the volume goes up even more.

 

JR- “Listen to this ovation for The Great One! The atmosphere is electrifying!”

 

The Rock starts pacing on the entrance stage, eying Brock Lesnar who stares right back. The venom, the pure hatred, the intense malice for each other is clearly visible in their eyes. Lesnar grins wolfishly in the ring and does a two-handed “Bring It” gesture to The Rock. That angers the People’s Champion even more. He suddenly dashes towards the ring as the crowd explodes in cheers for this.

 

DiBiase- “Here we go! This should be great!”

 

JR- “It’s going to be great, no doubt about that.”

 

The Rock arrives at ringside and leaps through the open door of the cage. He and Lesnar start to exchange hard blows. The referee rings the bell to get the match officially under way.

 

*Cage Match*

Brock Lesnar VS The Rock

The Rock and Lesnar keep exchanging right hands. Lesnar is getting the upper hand. He beats The Rock backwards against the ropes and into a corner. The crowd starts booing, but changes their mind and starts cheering instead when The Rock grabs Lesnar and shoves him in the corner. The People’s Champion unloads with a flurry of punches to the jaw of his opponent. He spits in his right hand. Slap! Lesnar is knocked back tightly into the corner by that last punch. The Rock grabs him by the wrist and drags him out, but keeps him along the ropes. The Irish whip follows. Lesnar bounces off the ropes on the opposite side... and gets nailed by a stiff Back Elbow Smash, courtesy of The Rock. He stumbles to his feet again, but The Rock knocks him down with one swift punch. The Rock jumps down on Lesnar to mount him and starts punching away at him. Lesnar tries to cover up but Rocky is relentless and keeps hitting him. Referee Nick Patrick tries to pull The Rock off of him, but gets shoved away for his troubles. The Rock then goes back to punching Lesnar across the face. After another barrage of fists, he finally gets up, panting from the vicious assault. Lesnar hurriedly crawls towards the ropes. He grabs them to help himself to his feet and turns around. The Rock is right in front of him and swings his right arm to punch Lesnar again... It connects. More closed fists follow and Lesnar covers up. He suddenly shoves The Rock away with such great force that the People’s Champion falls down and goes tumbling backwards. He jumps to his feet again, but Lesnar ploughs through him with an annihilating clothesline, knocking the back of his head against the mat. The Rock immediately grabs his head and rolls around in pain. Lesnar stands over him. He puts his hand to his mouth to see if he’s bleeding from all the punches he took, but he’s not.

 

He drags The Rock back to his feet and violently tosses him into a corner so the back of his head connects with the top turnbuckle. The Rock cringes and falls down on his knees. He grabs the back of his head again. Lesnar realizes that The Rock’s head might be injured and grins wolfishly again. He gives him some mocking slaps to the head to much chagrin of the fans. Lesnar suddenly goes into his serious mood and grabs The Rock’s chin with one hand. With the other hand, he starts to lay punches into his head. With every punch he receives, The Rock weakens and slowly but surely, he falls down on his knees. Lesnar bends over. He screams at The Rock that’s nothing and pushes him backwards against the turnbuckles so he’s sitting against them. He starts kicking him in the head with the heel of his boot. The crowd keeps booing, but the boos get louder now. After having handed out almost a dozen stomps, Lesnar stops. He turns around and walks to the middle of the ring. He turns around again to face his opponent and runs at him... A vicious Boot Scrape connects! The crowd moans loudly, feeling The Rock’s pain. Lesnar flashes a sadistic smile at The Rock and starts stomping on him again. Nick Patrick vainly tries to tell Lesnar to back off from The Rock so he can check on him, but Lesnar’s scowl is enough to have him back off instead. Lesnar gives The Rock some regular yet still painful Boot Scrapes to the head and finally drags him to his feet after that. Some mocking slaps by the Next Big Thing draw even more jeers from the crowd. Lesnar grabs The Rock’s wrist and launches him forcefully into the opposite corner. The Rock collides chest-first with the top turnbuckle and falls down in pain. Lesnar calmly walks up to him and puts his boot on his opponent’s face. He cockily raises his arms as The Rock weakly tries to push the boot on his face away. The crowd keeps booing and a lone, half full paper cup is even thrown against the cage.

 

Lesnar doesn’t notice nor care. He removes his boot from The Rock and drags him to his feet, shoving him into the corner. He bends over and rams his muscled shoulder into the gut of his opponent... and again... and again. With every thrust, The Rock looks like he’s going to vomit his intestines out. After six or seven Shoulder Blocks, Lesnar stands up again. He does a step backwards... and sends The Rock reeling with a stiff right hand to the temple. He backs off to the opposite corner and eyes The Rock. Suddenly he runs at him and jumps up... a stiff leaping Knee Smash connects with Rocky’s head. Lesnar lands on his feet again and grabs him by the head. He forcefully throws him down and goes for the cover: 1... 2... kick-out.

 

JR- “The Rock is taking a serious beating here. He might have a concussion with all those vicious blows he received from this monster.”

 

Styles- “Lesnar might be ruthless, but he’s smart as well. He saw that The Rock was having pain in his head, unusually much pain so he started to focus on that part. Very smart, indeed.”

 

Lesnar sits up to one knee and applies a Rear Sleeper Hold on The Rock. The sudden lack of oxygen going to his brain seems to wake The Rock up, sending him into a panic attack. He swings his arms wildly for a few seconds before grabbing Lesnar’s arm that’s under his chin. He tries to pull it away, but Lesnar is stronger and maintains the hold. He tries to grab the ropes that are not too far to his right. Lesnar sees this, though. He gets up so he’s standing there bent over with The Rock still in the Sleeper Hold and turns him to the left. The Rock is now lying on his stomach. Lesnar goes to sit on his back and applies a Camel Clutch. Rocky’s fading away. The crowd sees it too and starts up a loud “Rocky!” chant. Lesnar looks around with a pissed off look on his face. He suddenly shows that wolfish grin again and cranks back on the hold. The referee asks a semi-conscious Rock if he wants to give up, but he refuses. After a little while more, Lesnar gives up and lets go. He gets up and drags The Rock up with him. But The Rock immediately falls down again like a dishrag. Lesnar spreads his arms, saying “What am I supposed to do with this?”. He tries to drag him up again... and it works this time, but The Rock still seems out of it. Lesnar shoves him against the ropes and goes for an Irish Whip. The Rock gets a sudden burst of energy and reverses it... into a DDT! Both warriors are down and the crowd explodes in cheers. Another “Rocky!” chant starts up.

 

JR- “A desperation move by The Rock! This will give him some time to recuperate!”

 

Styles- “Yes, it will. But will that be enough? Lesnar is still a lot fresher than The Rock. He didn’t take nearly as much punishment.”

 

The referee starts to count: 1... 2... 3... 4... Lesnar is moving, 5... 6... The Rock too, but Lesnar is up already, 7... 8... 9... The Rock is on one knee. Lesnar walks over to him and grabs him by his throat. The Rock suddenly gets another burst of energy and slaps Lesnar’s claws aside. He then start punching him to a huge reaction of the fans. After a few punches, The Rock spits in his right hand. Before he can even turn his head back to Lesnar, the Next Big Thing gives him a sharp knee in the gut, making him double over. Lesnar follows up with a Double Axe Handle to the back of the head and The Rock is down again. He drags him up again and applies a standing Head Scissors (Piledriver/Powerbomb setup). He applies a waistlock and lifts The Rock on his shoulders.

 

Styles- “If this connects, The Rock is done for!”

 

DiBiase- “Kill him, Brock. Kill him!”

 

But The Rock suddenly starts punching Lesnar as he’s on his shoulder. Lesnar is reeling backwards. But suddenly he turns around... and smashes The Rock against the cage wall! He backs up a few steps. Then he runs towards the cage wall again and rams Rocky’s head in it once more to huge, pitying moans of the crowd. But Lesnar still doesn’t let go. He maneuvers towards a corner... and Powerbombs The Rock with the back of his head against the top turnbuckle! The Great One seems out of it. Lesnar grabs a leg of The Rock and pulls him to the middle of the ring. He goes down with a Lateral Press: 1... 2... The Rock kicks out. Lesnar gets up and looks down at his opponent. He drags him to his feet and gives him a stiff punch that sends him flying back into a corner. Lesnar walks up to him. He grabs his wrist and Irish Whips him into the opposite corner. The Rock collides back-first with the turnbuckle and immediately gets met by a hard clothesline that nearly takes his head off. Lesnar grabs his wrist again and goes to launch him into the opposite corner. This time, The Rock reverses it... and drops Lesnar with a Samoan Drop! The crowd goes wild again as both men are down.

 

JR- “Another desperation move by The Rock! Will he be able to take advantage of it this time?”

 

Referee Nick Patrick starts the count: 1... 2... 3... 4... Lesnar starts moving, 5... The Rock as well, 6... 7... 8... Both men are on one knee, 9... Lesnar runs at The Rock, but The Great One tosses the Next Big Thing over his head with a Release Belly-To-Belly Overhead Throw. The adrenaline is washing through even the smallest vein of The Rock like a tidal wave. He suddenly looks intense and ready to fight. Lesnar stumbles to his feet again. He turns around to face The Rock... and gets taken down by a clothesline. He quickly gets up, but once more, he gets clotheslined down. The Rock leaps at Lesnar. He grabs his arms and spins around it... La Majistral Cradle! The referee goes down for the count: 1... Lesnar is kicking frantically to get out, 2... he kicks out! The Rock quickly gets up on one knee. One hand is placed on the mat to support him as he’s on the brink of exhaustion. He’s panting heavily but also deeply to try and recover quicker. Not even chewing on a fresh adrenaline gland will keep you going at a high pace. The Rock finally gets up with a grunt and walks over to Lesnar. He gives him a stiff Soccer Kick right in his face to a huge “Oooh!” of the crowd. He drags him to his feet. The Irish Whip into the ropes... gets reversed. The Rock bounces off the ropes and takes Lesnar down with a leaping Forearm. He crawls towards Lesnar’s legs and hooks them for the Sharpshooter. The crowd pops big time again. Lesnar is swaying his arms in panic but The Rock is resilient... The Sharpshooter is locked in! Lesnar screams in pain, squinting his eyes like that would help relieve him a bit of the pain. The Rock is screaming as well, caught up in the moment and again fueled with adrenaline. The referee is on his knees by Lesnar to ask him if he wants to give up. Lesnar refuses. The Rock keeps the hold tightly locked in. Lesnar tries to bend his torso sideways and reaches for Rocky’s leg between thrust of intense pain. After what seems like an eternity, he manages to grab his leg and pull it from under him so The Rock falls down and lets go off the hold.

 

The Rock gets up and stomps Lesnar’s head a few times. He drags him up and punches him against the ropes. The Irish Whip... gets reversed. The Rock comes back and tries another leaping Forearm. Lesnar catches him and hurls him overhead to send him flying through the air. The Rock comes down in a wicked position, hard on his neck and back of his head. Lesnar walks over to him and grabs him by the back of his head. He pushes The Rock face-first against the steel grating and tries to use it to peel the People’s Eyebrow and face off by rubbing it against The Rock’s face. The Rock is screaming in agony. The referee orders Lesnar to let go, but Lesnar refuses. He keeps torturing The Great One for a bit more. He finally lets go. Lesnar lifts The Rock up and drops him over his shoulder. He walks towards a turnbuckle to attempt a Snake Eyes, but The Rock slides off his back and pushes him into the corner instead. He stumbles out of it and turns around. He’s hooked for the Rock Bottom! ... Lesnar elbows out of it and immediately lifts The Rock up for the F5! He swings The Rock over his head... and gets DDTed in the counter! The crowd goes nuts as both men seem completely out of it. The referee counts once again: 1... 2... 3... 4... Both men stir, 5... 6... They are both on one knee, 7... 8... And now they’re on their feet. Lesnar tries to punch Rocky... but it’s blocked. The Rock lashes out with a punch of his own. And another one, another one and one more. He spits in his hand... Slap! Lesnar reels backwards. The Rock runs at him... but Lesnar picks him up in a Fireman’s Carry.

 

DiBiase- “Here it comes! Ha ha ha ha!”

 

F5! F5! F5 connects! Lesnar goes for the cover as the crowd is booing their heads off: 1... 2... The Rock kicks out! Lesnar sits up in shock. He can’t believe it. He gets back to his feet, determined to finish this match. He drags The Rock up and lifts him onto his shoulders for another F5. The Rock kicks wildly into the air and slides off of his back, into a diving Inverted DDT. Both men are breathing heavily on the mat. Suddenly... The crowd explodes in cheers. The Rock kipped up and stands ready to strike, like a cobra, but is still panting. Lesnar is slowly getting to his feet. His back is turned towards The Rock. He’s up... and turns around. The Rock hooks him... Rock Bottom! Rock Bottom! Rock Bottom! Rock tiredly puts an arm over Lesnar’s broad chest for the exhausted cover: 1... 2... Lesnar gets his shoulder up!

 

JR- “Bah Gawd! The Rock kicked out of the F5! Brock Lesnar kicked out of the Rock Bottom! Bah Gawd!”

 

The Rock slowly makes his way to his feet again. He drags Lesnar up with him. He gives him some punches to back him up against the ropes. Irish Whip. Lesnar comes back... Spinebuster! A spine on the pine by The Great One! He gets up again and goes to stand by Lesnar’s head. He kicks his arms next to him and starts to remove his right elbow pad to a huge pop of the crowd. The elbow pad is thrown against the cage. The arms are swung in a totally moronic fashion and The Rock runs into the ropes. He comes back and jumps over Lesnar, into the other ropes. He rebounds once more... and gets picked up by Lesnar in a Spienbuster-like fashion. Lesnar storms towards the cage wall with The Rock in front of him like a human battering ram and drives him against the cold, unforgiving steel. The Rock lets out a scream. Lesnar is still holding him. He turns around and plants him with a Spinebuster, returning the favor. The Next Big Thing is on his hands and knees to catch his breath. He slowly gets up and starts climbing the cage. He doesn’t want to have anything to do with this anymore. But the exhaustion has got to him too and he’s climbing very slowly. Below him, The Rock is getting up like a Demon trapped in pit who sees his prey escaping. He gets up and grabs Lesnar’s leg. Lesnar looks down with a mixed look of worry and contempt. He tries to kick himself free, but The Rock holds on and he slowly climbs up next to him. When they’re at the same level, they start to exchange blows. Pretty soon, both men are teetering a bit above the top rope. Every punch can send one of them down to the mat. The Rock connects with a punch, so does Lesnar. The Rock again. Lesnar... sees his punch getting blocked. Rocky lets go of the cage with his other hand and hooks Lesnar... Rock Bottom all the way down to the mat!

 

Styles- “Awww Mahhh Gawwwd! A Rock Bottom all the way down to the maaattt!”

 

The crowd starts a “Holy Shit!” chant. Both valiant warriors are down in the ring. After a long while, The Rock drapes an arm over Lesnar’s chest. Nick Patrick counts: 1... 2... Lesnar gets the shoulder up! The crowd gasps in shock and boos. The Rock sits up, shocked as well. He slowly makes his way to his feet. He drags Lesnar up. The Next Big Thing gets punched against the ropes. The Rock grabs his wrist for an Irish Whip... but pulls his opponent into a Spinebuster instead. He goes to stand by Lesnar’s head again for another attempt at the People’s Elbow. The arms go into a momentary seizure as there’s no elbow pad to remove. The Rock runs into the ropes, bounces off, jumps over Lesnar and runs into the ropes on the opposite side. He rebounds...

 

*Boom!*

 

JR- “What the hell?”

 

The chords of Finger Eleven’s “Slow Chemical” blare through the speakers. Everyone looks in shock at the entrance stage, including The Rock, as the Big Red Machine Kane walks down to the ring!

 

Styles- “It’s Kane! What is he doing here?!”

 

Kane walks down to the ring, driven by stygian powers of Cthulhu-esque proportions. The Rock is standing in the ring, not knowing what to do but looking at the monster. Kane arrives at ringside. He grabs Brian Hebner, who was guarding the cage door, and smashes his head against it. He then takes the key and unlocks the door.

 

JR- “I don’t like this one bit for The Rock.”

 

Kane steps into the ring and stands there. The Rock keeps looking at him. Kane raises his arms slowly, summoning demonic spirits from the deepest layers of Hell. He throws his arms down again and hellfire explodes from the four ring posts. The Rock has seen enough and runs at the intruder... but gets taken down by a Big Boot.

 

JR- “What the hell is going on?!”

 

Kane drags The Rock to his feet and with one swift punch, he knocks him into a corner. He walks over to him and starts laying it into The Rock with hard punches to the head. After a furious flurry of them, Kane Uppercuts The Great One, making him reel back and stumble out of the corner. Kane grabs The Rock by the throat. The crowd explodes in piercing boos, jeers and insults. The Rock is lifted up high into the air... Chokeslam! The mat shook on impact. Kane looks down at the carcass of The People’s Champion and makes the slit-throat gesture. He drags The Rock up and lifts him up in a Tombstone Piledriver position. The crowd... cheers? Kane turns around with The Rock still in position so he faces the cage door... and gets Dropkicked in the knee by Chris Jericho!

 

JR- “Chris Jericho?! What’s he doing here?!”

 

The Rock tumbles forward and falls down on his back as Jericho is punching and chopping away at the Big Red Machine. He backs him up in the corner on the opposite side of the corner with the cage door. Irish Whip... gets reversed. Jericho collides back-first in the corner. Kane runs at him... but gets booted in the face. He stumbles back a bit but immediately comes back with an attempt to clothesline Jericho. Jericho ducks under Kane’s arm though. He turns around and jumps on the second rope. He immediately springboards off, kicking Kane’s crisped brains in with a wicked springboard Enzuigiri! Kane falls over the top rope and out of the cage again. The crowd is cheering Jericho on.

 

Styles- “What a move! What a kick! A beautiful adapted Springboard Enzuigiri by Chris Jericho! An amazing move!”

 

Back in the ring, both The Rock and Brock Lesnar are getting up. Lesnar is facing away from The Rock. He turns around. He’s hooked for a Rock Bottom... but he lifts The Rock onto his shoulders in one time. Lesnar doesn’t throw him over his head, but instead he throws him up vertically so The Rock’s head is down and his feet are high in the air. Lesnar falls down... and spikes The Rock furiously on the mat! You can almost hear the People’s Champion’s skull crack! The crowd releases an “Oooh!” and then starts up a “Holy Shit!” chant.

 

Styles- “Awww Mahhh Gawwwd! He just spiked The Rock with that F5! He’s dead!”

 

JR- “Bah Gawd! Bah Gawd! I think so too. The Rock must be dead!”

 

DiBiase- “Well, seeing as you two are throwing your catch phrases in, I should do the same thing: Ha ha ha ha!”

 

Lesnar drapes an arm over The Rock’s chest. Nick Patrick counts: 1... 2... apart from the breathing, there’s no sign of life about The Rock whatsoever. He’s not moving at all, ... 3.

 

Winner Via Pinfall: Brock Lesnar

[King Cucaracha 0]

Hmm...seems to me you should scroll down the board and check out the SWF. You might do pretty well judging by this.

[Guest Real F'n Show]

Good stuff man, I like the amount of detail in everything. I liked your Benoit/Saturn HIAC better, but this was still damn good.