Hoff 0 Report post Posted January 14, 2005 HeldDOWN is presented by OAOAST Entertainment. *^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^* OAOAST HeldDOWN~! HD's brand-new theme song, Ashlee Simpson's La La, blares into the TV sets of America as another HeldDOWN~! kicks off, with the LOGO... ...and the FIREWORKS.... And we take it to...our first match!! (The arena goes black.) Cue: ‘Seven Nation Army’ CABOOSE Here’s my boy! *ding ding* (Spotlight up on The Phenom) BUFFER The following handicap match is scheduled for one fall. Entering first, from Santa Cruz, Portugal, weighing in at 210 lbs., THA PHENOM! (Slight pop) COLE Fans, welcome to this week's edition of HeldDOWN, the premiere show in sports-entertainment! We've got a huge night ahead of us! COACH It's gonna be slaptastic, and dizzerific, and-- CABOOSE End it, already. COACH YO~! COLE And we'll tell you all about it...after our first match!! COACH YO~! CABOOSE Stop. Please. COLE Now, for those of you who missed last week’s HeldDOWN~!, The Phenom _must_ win this match to get a shot at the OAOAST 24/7 championship. However, he has a hard road ahead. COACH You’ve got that right, Mike. Why does The Phenom have to fight two men at once for a title shot, while others simply just get it? I think Watts has a vendetta against him. Cue: (Generic Spanish Music) BUFFER And his opponents, from Latin America, weighing in at 230 lbs., Uno y Dos, LOS CON-KISTA-DOORS! (The kiddies cheer) Los Conquistadors salute the crowd, before tumbling down the isle and saluting them again. CABOOSE You’ve got to admit; Los Conquistadors sure know how to make an entrance! COLE Get your Los Conquistadors action figures today at your local Val-U-Save-Co-Mart! The Phenom takes off his jacket. *ding ding ding* Conquistador Dos is the first out, but lands straight into wicked punch! Phenom kicks Dos in the head as he tries to regain he bearings. He falls back….but lands on his feet again! He starts doing the robot as The Phenom charges at him….. ….but dodges out of the way at the last second, causing Phenom to bounce off the ropes and into a big boot! Phenom gets up and gets in a headlock. Dos attempts to kick him in the rear, but gets pinned instead! One! Dos kicks out and goes for the tag, but The Phenom POUNCES~! on Dos! The Phenom thinks he’s got him, but Dos Makes the tag! Uno goes in and starts kicking The Phenom, until Phenom grabs his foot! COLE What’s Phenom going to do? I’ll tell you what he’s going to do. He lifts Uno’s leg higher and higher, until Uno’s standing leg cannot take it, and causes both to go down! Phenom makes the cover. One! Two! At the last moment, Phenom gets up. Why? CABOOSE It looks like there’s a hole in Phenom’s trunks! That’s right! The old ‘Ass Bite’ trick! The Phenom hasn’t had one of those in 2 years! As he tries to regain himself, Uno goes for EL ARMDRAG~! It connects, causing The Phenom to fall…backwards! Onto Uno! One! Two! Three! NO! Uno kicks out just before the hand hits the mat a 3rd time! COLE That was 2.99! COACH What? COLE In Portugal, they don’t have fractions. COACH Oh. Weird. The Phenom has an odd look on his face, not realizing that he had covered Uno just then. He goes to the ropes as Uno gets up, and hits a Hellraiser! Coverup. One! Two! Thr-no! Uno kicks out! The Phenom gnashes his teeth at this fact. He gets so angry, he throws Uno at Dos, getting both out of the ring! CABOOSE What a throw! The counts begin. One! Two! Los Conquistadors looked knocked out! Three! Four! Five! COACH It looks like The Phenom has wrapped this up! Six! But sure as the cliché goes, Dos starts to rise! Seven! He starts to stand! Eight! He dusts himself off! Nine! He….dances? Ten! *ding ding ding* BUFFER Here is your winner, via countout, THA PHE- The Phenom takes the mike from Buffer. PHENOM Gimme that! I want to tell Geddon something. I know where you are, and I know where you’ll be on January 30th. Prepare….to phear…The Phenom! The Phenom drops the mike. ‘Seven Nation Army’ hits up again. COACH Well, it looks like there’s a match at AnglePalooza! COLE Yes, it will be The Phenom vs. Devin “Arma” Geddon for the 24/7 title, only on Pay-Per-View! COACH Oh, man, that's gonna be HUGE!! COLE Folks, welcome, I'm Michael Cole, flanked by the Coach and Caboose, and if you're just tuning in, you missed one heel of a performance by The Phenom!! CABOOSE That man is absolutely scary, Michael. COLE I can't wait for he and Devin Geddon to get it on. but enough about that, let's talk about what we've got for tonight!! COACH Oh, yeah baby, we got DA WOMEN in the house!! Holly-wood defends against...uh...some Asian chick! CABOOSE Nice, with the racial profiling. Forget the chicks, the TRUE class is in the house, Black T! COLE Plus a whole lot more, and...wait, well, word is, we've got some previously recorded comments from both Black T and their opponents tonight, the Saints! Let's check it out! RECORDED EARLIER TODAY Parked outside the arena, the tour bus of The Saints, "SAINTS & SINNERS," is a-rocking. Very faint giggling and moans coming out of the bus, the windows steamed. We cut inside the bus, where female pornstars -- black, white, Asian, Mexican -- are all over Logan "Usher" Mann and Synth, the two laughing like a couple of teenage boys who saw their first pair of breasts as they pull their pants back up from around their ankles, wiping away lipstick on their lips. Also with The Saints in their tour bus are their Director of Wrestling Ops. Jim Cornette, who's not a pornstar, rather holding a wireless microphone, and their Image Consultant Holly-Wood, who looks none to pleased to be around the pre-match party. CORNETTE (chuckles) I can see you guys are having a great time. Good way to keep loose before your big tag title match later tonight. I promised you a shot at the World tag team titles if you signed with Jim Cornette Enterprises, and I've delivered. Tonight's the night. The gold comes back into the camp of J.C.E. Haha! LOGAN I gotta admit -- I was a bit worried about signing with J.C.E., but boy have I been proven wrong. SYNTH Ah lovin' it! Ush wuz all's worried and shit, and Ah like, this dude knows what he's doing, Mann, you know? Ah mean, since joining J.C.E. we've been rollin', rollin, rollin', rollin'. Not only have we beaten Hell's Hitmen, but our Christmas album sold out so fast some people didn't even know we released one. My sick dog has made an incredible recovery. I'm getting laid every 5 minues. And tonight...ooh, the World tag team titles come to the Synthmeister and Usher. When nobody else believed in us -- *coughHOLLYcough* -- you did, Mr. C. And as a token of our love, here's a hottie for James E. Synth grabs one of the pornstars by the hair and flings her onto Cornette's lap. These gals like it rough. CORNETTE For me? Oh, you didn't have too. SYNTH What, you wanted a man or you just be humbled? We's can get your a ma-- CORNETTE No, no! I was just being humble. Say, are you guys ready for tonight? SYNTH & LOGAN WHOOOO! CORNETTE All right, then. Synth claps his hands and sexy soul music begins playing. The chicks dive back on Synth and Logan, Synth's eyes nearly popping out of their sockets as he stares at the ladies' bouncing fake boobies. SYNTH Orgy after we's win! CUT TO: Black T standing in front of a computer-generated OAOAST logo, the tag titles draped over their shoulders, dressed in tailor-made suits and sunglasses, with T-Bod sporting large 1980s-style sunglasses rather than Black's modern look. Nevertheless, both men looking sharpe. T-BOD Stephen Joseph? Heh heh heh. Oh, yes, good 'ol Stephen. Me and you go back, way back, but what have you done lately to deserve a response from us? Appear on national television, whining about Black T forming the most elite organization in OAOAST history along with Zack Malibu? Why? Let me break it down for you, Stephen, it's quite simple. T-Bod removes his sunglasses. T-BOD Money. Lots of money. And championship gold. Inten5e could've been where The Original Elite is today, Stephen, but you let your personal agenda with The Mad Cappa get in the way of our objective. The fact of the matter is, you saw how Black T was blazin' through the OAOAST like a wildfire and figured, I need to leach off these two studs. So you come to us with this masterplan. And just like every other plan you've come up with, it blew up in your face. Instead of shoving our fists down your throats and our $5,000 loafers up your ass, we went along with it because it was a win/win situation for us, but you dropped the ball, my friend. Our relationship with Zack Malibu is a marriage of convenience. We have a common enemy: The Global Party XChange. While Dan was recovering from an knee injury, we saw what was going down between Zack and the GPX. So we came up with a plan to offer my services to Zack for me -- Tony "The Body" Brannigan -- to be his partner against GPX only under the agreement we "Freebird" the championships, meaning any two members of our threesome could defend the titles. And so far, it's worked like a charm. We stand before as the World tag team champions, and the greatest team going today. Now, as far as you wanting me or Dan to be your first... well, we have no problem's with your lifestyle choices, but the answer is NO! So boo-hoo. Boo-hoo-hoo. Let me give you a piece of advice you can share with the grandkids when you're old and alone. Don't cry over spilled milk, it isn't going to clean itself up. Tony "The Body" Brannigan coolly puts his shades back on. BLACK Now onto much more important matters. Later tonight, The Saints will step in the ring with the greatest tag team alive today, the OAOAST World tag team champions...Black T. All your singing -- which is quite horrible -- and dancing will not be able to make up for your lack of experience and wrestling skill. It doesn't matter if we go 5 minutes, 30 minutes, or an hour, we're going out there to win at any cost. We don't care if it's our own family. You come after our belts, we come after your lives. And you can quote us on that. Dan and T-Bod flash the 3-B hand signal as we fade out. *cut to commercial* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hoff 0 Report post Posted January 14, 2005 (edited) Woke Up This Morning Got Yourself A Gun Mama Always Said You'd Be The Chosen One “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” CABOOSE YES! Here comes the man we all paid to see! COLE You paid to get in here? CABOOSE Hey, security didn’t recognize me. The OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion finally appears at the top of the ramp, obviously pissed off, belt in hand, storming toward the ring. Drek rolls into the ring straight away, and before Michael Buffer can announce his name, he snatches the microphone away, enticing a louder chorus of boos from the crowd. Drek paces around the ring, waiting for the boos to die down, as his music does the same. CABOOSE Now come on, why aren’t these people showing Drek Stone, our OAOAST Champion, some respect? COACH Because they don’t respect him! COLE What? Coach is right for once? Drek brings the microphone to his lips, but before he can open his mouth the boos become louder, the crowd showing more and more hatred for the Champ. Drek becomes annoyed very quickly, threatening a guy in the front row, and enticing more boos. He finally, after a minute or so, brings the microphone to his lips… DREK YOU WILL ALL RESPECT THE OAOAST CHAMPION DAMMIT! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Drek paces further around the ring, getting more and more riled up at the crowd’s disrespectful boos and taunts. DREK Now, I’m here tonight for BUSINESS. I wouldn’t come to this town if you all funded my trip! You rotten bastards, you should learn some respect! I’m the guy you gave your hard-earned to see! I don't even LIKE Seattle, at first I thought it was because I hate the Mariners, the Seahawks and the Sonics, but now I know its because Seattle is the home of ugly, disgusting fessacchioni like all of you! “ASS-HOLE! ASS-HOLE!” The reaction doesn’t surprise Drek, so he decides to do the one thing he knows will shut the crowd up – he ignores them and continues on with his spiel. DREK Now two weeks ago, SOMEONE saw fit to ruin MY segment! I worked VERY HARD on putting that together, and SOME ASSHOLE SCREWED IT UP! Well, Watts said that you would be here, so I’m counting on you getting your ass out here right now! I don’t care who you are, and I don’t care what you want, because this isn’t about you, it’s about me. I’m the Champion; I’m the man around here. What I want, I get! So, to whoever it was who screwed me last week; I WANT you to come out here, so I can KICK YOUR ASS! COLE Wow, Drek’s not a happy camper tonight. CABOOSE He has every right to be pissed off guys, that segment was gold last week, and some idiot ruined everything! Drek paces around the ring once more, impatient, waiting on his newest adversary. Suddenly, some unfamiliar music hits, and Drek seems perplexed. COLE Huh? Drek, hunched over the ring ropes, looks intently at the entrance ramp, when finally out steps… …Phoenix? COACH Phoenix? COLE It was Phoenix? CABOOSE Well, the bookers sure as hell have lost their minds. Drek is even more pissed off now, quite possibly thinking “what the hell?” The masked Mexican OAOAST Developmental talent has a microphone in his hand, and he shows all the timing of a rookie when he begins to speak before his music even stops. PHOENIX It was me Drek! ME! I screwed with your segment! I ruined everything for you! I have gone through countless injuries in this company, and I have been looked over for the last time! I want my title shot Drek, and I want it tonight! The crowd pops slightly, still not having a fucking clue as to why Phoenix would even have anything to do with the Champ. Drek brings the microphone to his lips, but stops halfway, a fire in his eyes that he seldom see. DREK You want a title shot? YOU? What in the hell have you ever done here? What in the hell makes you think that you’re worthy of challenging for the most prestigious championship in wrestling? OK, I’ll compromise, considering how badly I want to beat the hell out of you right now. Tonight, one on one, you and me, Drek Stone versus Phoenix… in a non-title match. If you win, you get a shot. If you don’t like that idea, I may as well save you the trouble and come up there right now to kick your ass! PHOENIX Oh that’s cool Drek, you and me, tonight? Sure thing. Oh, and believe me Drek Stone, this is going to be one hell of a night for one of the brightest stars in the OAOAST. The random jobber music hits again, as Phoenix drops the microphone and hurries to the backstage area. Drek is about ready to explode by this stage, as he still can’t believe that this was the work of some random Mexican jobber. COLE Well, that guy sure as hell has a death wish, don’t you agree? CABOOSE This is going to be uglier than Axel versus Ragdoll; I can’t wait to see Drek open up on that ingrate. Suddenly, the crowd pops, as we cut to a shot of Crystal stepping out of a locker room, a smirk on her face! “Would you hurry up! Our match is next!” The crowd gets even louder as none other than Axel steps out of the locker room after Crystal! “Alright alright, I’m ready! You really shouldn’t be wearing white tights, you know…” Crystal gets a sarcastic-shocked look on her face as she playfully hits Axel, who covers up. They both start laughing, wit Crystal trying to keep a straight face... “Shut up!” “No you shut up!” “Stop it, you’re making me laugh, let’s go, we’ve got a match to win.” COLE It’s a Rumble Qualifying tag match, and its next! Edited January 14, 2005 by Hoff Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hoff 0 Report post Posted January 14, 2005 (edited) COLE We are back live on OAOAST HeldDown, and we are ready for Tag Team action! "Mindfields" by Prodigy hits as the former Rave and Assault Squad, Mikey and Nate, make their way to ringside, to a mixed reaction. BUFFER Ladies and Gentlemen, the following tag team contest is an Anglepalooza Rumble qualifying match, scheduled for one fall! On the way to the ring, at a combine weight of four hundred eight pounds… NATE and MIIIIIIIKEY! COACH Bill Watts, after hearing Axel’s speech last week, thought that he should have to prove that he should be allowed in the Rumble match, and after seeing his interaction with Crystal, Watts decided to book this Tag Match, with the winners going into the Rumble. COLE We haven’t seen Mikey and Nate for months on OAOAST Television; they have developed quite a career for themselves in HI-YAH actually. CABOOSE Yeah, but tonight they are going up against Axel and Crystal – and about that, what the hell is up with those two? COLE Well, they’ve buried the hatchet somewhat, we know the history between the two of them, and they have wanted to get back to being friends for a while, and now they have. It’s good for both of them to have a firm ally. But in any event, Mikey and Nate also want a spot in the Rumble match, and who knows? Maybe it could be Drek Stone versus Mikey at AngleMania four. Cue: “Set it Off” by Audioslave “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH!” COACH Here comes my baby girl! Crystal steps into the arena, greeting the fans on her way down the entrance ramp, the smirk from before still present on her face. BUFFER Their opponents, first, The Female Phenom… CRYYYYYYYYSTAL! COLE She’s radiant tonight, Crystal looks happy as Larry! Crystal steps into the ring and plays to the crowd, before looking at the entrance ramp in waiting for her partner’s entrance. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM~! The crowd comes alive once again as “Down With The Sickness” begins after the usual pyro blast that signifies the entrance of The Dark Prince. BUFFER And her partner, The HI-YAH World Heavyweight Champion… AAAAAAAAAXELLLLLLLL! COLE Here he is! Axel steps from behind the curtain, HI-YAH Belt around his waist, and immediately plays to the crowd, lightly jogging to about halfway down the ramp. He points to the left hand side crowd, and then to the right, and finally with both fingers pointing to the ring, and… BOOM! He strikes the crucifix pose, setting off another pyro blast at the top of the ramp! COLE Man, Axel is pumped up tonight! He must know something we don’t! Axel steps up onto the apron and between the ropes, before taking off his coat and title belt and giving them to Michael Buffer. The referee calls for the bell, and it is decided that Crystal and Nate should start the match. COACH We are underway in this Rumble qualifying match! CABOOSE Are these two the only people that have to actually qualify for the Rumble? COLE Pretty much, yeah. CABOOSE Then what’s the point of this match? COLE Don’t blame me! Blame the bookers! CABOOSE Then I refuse to commentate. COACH Hey, maybe we should have pointless bouts more often! Crystal and Nate lock up in the centre of the ring, and Crystal quickly applies a side head lock. Nate pushes Crystal into the ropes, Crystal comes off, Nate tries a clothesline but Crystal ducks under, Nate turns around… and right into a snapmare takeover! Nate is up quickly, but Crystal takes him down with another snapmare! Nate is up again, but Crystal takes him over for a third successive snapmare takeover, this time holding on to apply a rear chin lock! COLE Crystal really working that neck to start off this match, do you think that is the game plan of Axel and Crystal, considering Axel’s main moves focus on the head and neck? COACH Exactly Michael, they want to focus on a body part early and wear it down, and what better part to focus on than the neck? Nate gets to one foot, and tries to reverse the chin lock, but instead breaks the hold by elbowing Crystal in the gut. Nate grabs at his neck instinctively, before running to the ropes, Crystal picks Nate up in a tilt-a-whirl, but Nate hits a flying head scissors! This doesn’t have a lot of effect on Crystal as she is up again almost instantaneously. COLE Nate is a very agile athlete, he’s a true Cruiserweight! Nate goes for a kick to the midsection, but Crystal catches his foot! Nate then tries an Enziguri, but Crystal ducks under it and Nate lands on his foot again! Crystal pushes Nate’s foot back down to the ground, and grabs his head from behind, dropping him down in a Reverse DDT! COACH Wow! Great move by Crystal to reverse the Enziguri! Nate just got dropped right on the back of his head! Crystal walks over to Axel and tags him in, to a sizable pop from the crowd. Axel steps into the squared circle and immediately grabs Nate by the head, lifting him to his feet. Axel connects with a hard shot to the temple of Nate, followed by a second, and then a third, leaving the former Minion out on his feet. Axel locks in a front face lock, before turning it around into a neckbreaker position... and dropping Nate down, hard on the back of his head! COLE Another move focusing on Nates head and neck, Axel and Crystal are really starting to pick it apart! Cover by Axel on Nate! ONE… TWOONO! Nate gets a shoulder up at two. Axel hits a quick leg drop to the throat of Nate who is still on Dream Street. Nate gets to his feet again with some help from Axel, Axel sends Nate flying for an Irish Whip, Nate comes off of the other side, but Mikey slaps him in the back, making a blind tag! COLE The referee saw that, but did Axel see it? Nate comes off of the ropes, Axel charges and turns him INSIDE OUT with a huge clothesline! Axel turns to grab Nate, but Mikey is on the top rope, waiting to come into the ring! Crystal yells at Axel to turn around, and he does so, in time to be knocked down courtesy of a Mikey Crossbody! COLE Crossbody by Mikey! Could be an upset! Mikey covers! ONE… NO! Axel powers out as the referee counts one! COACH Axel was surprised by Mikey, but it didn’t seem to faze him all that much, kicking out as the referee counted one. Axel gets to his feet and Mikey connects with a kick to the stomach, followed by two quick forearms to the side of the head. Mikey goes for an Irish Whip, Axel reverses… SPINEBUSTAH~! Just PLANTS Mikey in the centre of the ring! CABOOSE Mikey’s chiropractor just hates Axel right now. Axel picks Mikey up to his feet by the hair, drags him over to his corner and tags Crystal in again, who enters the ring and hooks Mikey in a front face lock, before taking him over for a vertical suplex. She grabs Mikey again and brings him to his feet, before hitting a stiff forearm to the jaw. But Mikey is back on the offensive, as the forearm seems to wake him up, as he delivers two hard shots to the temple of the Female Phenom! Mikey rears back, and goes for a clothesline, but Crystal ducks…. And hits a Release German Suplex! COLE Great counter by Crystal, planting Mikey with that German! Crystal goes for a lateral press on Mikey, making the cover… ONE… TWOOOOOOONO! Mikey kicks out at two. COACH Mikey had better make a tag, he has been hit with a few nice impact moves from Axel and Crystal, he’d have to be feeling it a little right now. Crystal measures Mikey, ready for him to get up. Mikey obliges and turns into Crystal, who jumps up on his shoulders for a Hurricanrana… …but Mikey reverses, drilling Crystal with a Powerbomb! COLE Wow! The tide has now changed it seems! Crystal grabs at her back, and Axel is seen with a slightly worried look on his face. Crystal struggles to her feet, but Mikey backs up into his own corner where he is tagged by Nate. Nate runs at Crystal, who is up on both knees, and connects with a STIFF dropkick to Crystal’s face! Crystal goes down, and Nate goes to the outside of the ring to the apron, where he springboards onto the top rope, and comes down with a flying legdrop! Cover by Nate! COLE Heres a cover! They could be going to the Rumble! ONE… TWOOOOONO! Crystal kicks out with some ease at two. Nate picks Crystal up to her feet, before hooking her in a Back Suplex, and connecting with that very move. Nate runs to the ropes once again, and springboards off, turning in mid air and hitting a splash on Crystal! Another cover by Nate! ONE… TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOONO! Crystal kicks out again at two! Nate grabs Crystal to her feet again, and hits two forearms, and a boot to the stomach. COLE Nate should have really kept Crystal down on the mat on this exchange, a rookie move by Nate. Nate sends Crystal for an Irish Whip, Crystal comes off of the ropes; Nate tries a clothesline, Crystal ducks under and comes off of the other side, Nate tries a back elbow but Crystal ducks under again, Crystal comes off… Spinning Heel Kick sends Nate down! CABOOSE Well that’ll stop anyone. COLE Decided to commentate now have we? CABOOSE No, just observing. Crystal takes a little time getting to her feet, with Nate still down, but she soon stumbles over to her corner, and tags in Axel! Axel steps into the ring, and looks down at Nate, starting to pick him up, but Mikey rushes into the ring to face him! COLE What’s Mikey doing in there? Mikey starts talking trash to Axel, telling him that no one picks on his little brother. Axel smirks and says something to Mikey, and then… SLAP! Mikey slaps Axel right in the face! COACH Uh, Mikey, I don’t think you want to do that… Axel mockingly holds his face, and then… BAM! A right from Axel! And another right! A third! A fourth! Mikey is trying desperately to cover up, but it’s not going to happen! Axel kicks Mikey in the midsection, and PLANTS him with an Evenflow DDT! Axel then picks Mikey up by the hair, runs across the ring, and throws him over the top rope! COLE Axel’s getting in a little practice for the Rumble! Nate is already up, but Axel doesn’t see him! Axel turns around, and walks into a Nate super kick… NO! Axel catches his foot! Nate looks at Axel, who smiles and tells him that it was a good idea, but it didn’t work! Axel shoves Nate’s foot down to the ground, and connects with a hard uppercut! CABOOSE Man, we could hear that from up here! Nate staggers back, before trying a clothesline, and Axel ducks under it! Axel picks Nate up in a Tombstone position! COLE Dark Royalty time! BOOM! Axel plants Nate with Dark Royalty, right on his neck! COACH Forget about it! Axel thinks about covering Nate, but he looks over at Crystal, and smiles, asking her a question. She smiles back and nods her head, so Axel tags her in, and slumps in the opposite corner, just watching the action! Crystal enters the ring and looks at Nate, and then to the crowd, who pop HUGE! COLE What’s going on? The Female Phenom goes to the second rope near Nate, jumps… and Hits DIAMOND IN THE ROUGH! COACH The exclamation point! The cover! ONE!!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! THREEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH!” The referee completes the three count and the bell is rung, as Crystal and Axel get their hands raised by the official. As ‘Down with the Sickness” hits, the two friends seem a little happier than usual, and this is evident when they climb opposite turnbuckles to play to the crowd. COLE Crystal and Axel are in the Anglepalooza Rumble match! It is official! COACH Man, what a team they make! They got it done tonight! Axel and Crystal leave the ring and walk up the ramp, stopping halfway to raise each other’s hand, and leave. COLE Well, we still have more great action to come here on OAOAST HeldDown! Drek Stone face Phoenix, and Hoff is in the house! Stay tuned! *The camera focuses in on what appears to be a large condemned building and a man standing about 15 feet from it with his back to the camera. The man turns to the camera while it zooms in on him closer* “The 54th street Roller Disco. Use to be the hip place to be…full every night with a line at the door. Now it’s a shell of itself. Its exactly like the OAOAST. Wrestlers use to line-up at the doors to try and get into that fed and now…well now…most of them can’t be bothered to stay. Like rats from a sinking ship they move on to greener pastures and to programs where the fans actually show up and care. But don’t you worry! The Dude aint about to let the OAOAST turn into this! Starting next week the Dude is going to breathe life back into the place…starting next week The Dude is going to give you reason to tune back in, oh!…Have Mercy” *The 70s Dude turns his back to the camera and looks at the building once more. A strong breeze blows through and one of the giant letters atop the building that once made-up its sign sways back and forth before falling to the concrete below* *.....cut to commercial* Edited January 14, 2005 by Chuck Woolery Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hoff 0 Report post Posted January 14, 2005 The cameras focus on the ring as Bill Watts is already in the ring to LOUD “LET’S GO WATTS” chants! Cole: “Welcome back fans! Bill Watts is already in the ring.” Caboose: “No shit!” Coach: “I wonder if our headsets will go out again like last week!” Watts has a microphone with him. Cole: “I think it’s time for the non sanctioned match between Bill Watts and The Mad Cappa as there has been bad blood brewing between them for quite some time” Caboose: “Maybe you think that the bat attack had something to do with it?” Cole: “It did?” Caboose: “Never mind!” Coach: “Still that was what I didn’t expect at all!” Caboose: “I did and I’m quite amazed that it didn’t happen sooner.” Watts: “It’s time to explain myself! Cappa! You tried to take me out! However! You failed to realize one thing! I am a tough old son of a * bleep *! You hit me with your ridiculous baseball bat numerous times! So that was your BIG mistake! Let me clarify you on what the consequence is! If you lose this non sanctioned match against me, you WILL serve out the indefinite time frame no pay suspension! (In a mutter) If you win, then you won’t have to serve your time. So Cappa! Get your ass on out here now!” Cole: “I was right! It is time for the match!” “Breathe” by Fabolous flares up over the loudspeakers as Watts looks on anxiously. The crowd changes their tune to boos! Coach: “Well the fans seem unpleased to hear Breathe!” Cole: “That means Cappa is coming out, that’s why the fans are booing!” Caboose: “Why does everything have to spelt out?!” After a minute passes by, no Cappa! Triple C tries to pass time talking about Anglepalooza and wonder where Cappa was. An another minute passes by, still no Cappa! Cole: “Wow! Two minutes have gone by and still no sign of him anywhere!” Coach: “Maybe he wants to get suspended.” Caboose: “Maybe he realizes that this is wrong?” The crowd then starts “Bullshit” chants! Watts gets on the mic again as Cappa’s music stops. Watts: “What in the hell?! Cappa! You get out here this instant or consider your chances of being in the Royal Rumble good bye! I will see to that! You have 10 seconds to show up or consider yourself SUSPENDED!” Cole: “10 more seconds for the Mad One to show up.” Watts starts up the count along with the referee. The crowd joins in! 10……………………………………….. 9………………………………………… 8………………………………………… 7………………………………………… 6………………………………………… 5………………………………………… 4………………………………………... 3………………………………………... Coach: “This is cutting in very closely isn’t it?” 2…………………………………… But wait! “Breathe” by Fabolous kicks up again as Watts and the ref temporarily suspend their count. Cole: “So Cappa is going to show up!” Caboose: “Next thing you probably are going to wonder is where he has been.” Cole: “Such a psychic Caboose! Stop reading my mind!” Caboose: “Um……. I would never want to read your mind or anything like that you sick freak!” The music stops and the Angle Tron flickers up to the cameras that are outside as Josh Matthews runs up to Cappa! Cappa was walking towards his car with his gym bag in tow. Cappa opens up the trunk and casually places his bag in it. Josh: (Gasping) “Cap, Cappa! Wha what are you doing? You have a match out there with Bill right now! If you don’t go out there, you’ll be su……..” Cappa: (Interrupts, Snaps at Josh) “Suspended! Gatamela! Don’t you think I know that?! Well since Bill is watching this, listen up! What you are doing is bull * bleep *! Me facing you, what a bunch of crap! As you see people, he proved my point!” Josh: “What will that be?” Cappa: “He didn’t do the right thing! He was going to take my chance of getting a World title shot out of my hands! I couldn’t let him do it! So maybe I overreacted just a little bit! I thought that would’ve sent him a message, but he took it the VERY wrong way and challenged me to a NON sanctioned match for tonight! I didn’t agree to it in the first place and he’s going to suspend me? GO AHEAD! I’m still going down to the Royal Rumble and I’m going to get my shot! 14, 15 guys in my way. Pssh! They will go out! Watts, consider it my destiny!” “As for that match tonight, since I, and my lawyer, honestly feel that it is invalid and thus not grounds for a suspension since you stated that you wanted to kick my ass. You have made this too personal. I can’t allow it. What good would have it been for me to beat you? It would’ve gotten me no more closer! So I feel that this is not a safe place for me! I feel too upset about this that I’m going to go cool out since ! So you may say out (sarcastically) ‘O! He backed out! O Suspended!’” “So now I’m dippin’ out! Peace out ya’ll! Oh and one more thing! Seattle sucks! Thank you, thank you very much!” Cappa slides right into the driver’s seat and zooms off into the distance as Josh is like “um, ok”. The show returns to focus on Watts and the ref looks stunned. Cole: “So he has been outside the whole time!” Caboose: “Maybe we should call you Mr. Obvious.” Coach: “What a whiner!” Caboose: “He’s standing up for himself and not letting being bullied into such a losing matter!” Coach: “He just forfeit the match after weeks of doing nothing but piss off Bill Watts. When the time came for him to back it up, he just ducks out! This is a cop-out!” Watts: “Continue the count!” …………………………..1! “Ring the bell! I won! He forfeited! Therefore, he has been suspended!” * DING DING DING * Ring Announcer: (Reluctant) “The winner of this ‘match’……… BILL WATTTS!” Crowd boos heavily and chants out “Bullshit” and “Cappa Sucks”! Cole: “The fans feel cheated out!” Caboose: “If anything, they should’ve cheered! Imagine, Watts in a match! (* Shudders *) He just saved us all!” Coach: “Well, Cappa has been suspended for the time being but he still gets to make it to Royal Rumble. Wait a minute! How does that make sense?!” Cole: “Cappa is claming legal matters thus getting this more confusing by the minute!” Caboose: “We shall just wait and see.” Watts drops down the mic and just walks back to his office without saying a word as they go right into an Anglepalooza commercial. SUNDAY, JANUARY 30 OAOAST PRESENTS: ANGLEPALOOZA ORDER IT LIVE ON PAY-PER-VIEW!! We come back to a shot of Triple C. COLE Man, Anglepalooza, what a show that is gonna be... CABOOSE How do you know? COLE .....I'm sorry? CABOOSE You sure are. How do you know, Cole? We don't even know most of the matches! COLE Well...um...I bet it'll be good! CABOOSE You suck. COACH Hey! I thought I sucked!! CABOOSE Oh, believe me, buster. YOU suck. You are by no means suck-exempt. COACH Yeah! I rule!! CABOOSE (startled) Because you suck?! COACH Yeah! CABOOSE Um...ow. DAMN YOU, COACHMAN!!! Caboose FLIES out of his seat and beings strangling the Coach! Cole jumps and spills coffee everywhere, burning himself! Cole screams like a baby! IT'S CHAOS!! COLE Good lord...can we go to Terry Taylor, PLEASE?! (We’re in the actionZONE with the man, Terry F’N Taylor! The T man is sporting the official OAOAST Anglepalooza synchronized swimming jersey!) TERRY TAYLOR~! Ladies and gentlemen, Terry Taylor, official OAOAST tag team correspondent backstage in the actionZONE with none other then the number one contenders to the tag team titles, Alix Spezia and Krista Isadora Duncan. Ladies, Zack Malibu laid down the challenge and not only did you answer it, but you raised the stakes by turning that challenge around and issuing it to The Ice Heart Dan Black, and asking him to team with Zack Malibu to defend the tag team belts. Well, Black answered, and now it will be Chicks Over Dicks against Dan Black and Zack Malibu for the tag team titles at the opening match of Anglepalooza! (Crowd cheers. Krista yawns because Terry is boring as hell.) TAYLOR Let’s take you back to last week, you both had front row seats for one of the most shocking and disturbing events in the history of the OAOAST; Chris Stevens dropping the bombshell on Hoff and the world by coming out and admitting he’s the one who took Hoff out of action. Both of you, like everyone else, felt that Zack was finally getting what he deserved, but did your emotions change when you found out Zack Malibu was innocent of the crimes charged against his person? ALIX You bet, Double T! I went through a cornucopia of feelings! I changed emotions like my slut sister, Lea, changes husbands! Oh, but she’s the good one and I’m the black sheep? Yeah, sure. You could fill a football team with the amount of guy’s she fucked! But because she’s “saved” its okay? Yeah right! Hey, I got a bible! Will you answer my phone calls, Mom? Will you stop telling the ladies you play bridge with that I died three years ago? Christina can have six kids and only know the father of two of them but she’s welcome back because she accepted Christ into her life? Well, I’ll a tie cross to my ass if it’ll get me into the family reunion! Because for someone reason professional wrestling is synonymous with devil’s work and you don’t want anything to do with me! Well, I don’t want anything to do with you! And I hate you! And I’m glad dad left you! KRISTA Ahem, we’re on national television. ALIX AHEM! AHEM! AHEM TIMES INFINITY PLUS ONE HUNDRED MINUS THE SQUARE ROOT OF SEVEN to you two! I know we’re on TV. That’s what those cameras and producer forming his letter of resignation means. This is called character development, stooge! Maybe you’d like to try it sometime, Miss My gimmick is that I have big boobs and nice hair! TAYLOR (flustered as he always is when he has to interview CoD) Alix, your changing emotions! ALIX At least I’m not changing genders! Anyway, Hoff’s rampage? Yeah, my emotions were all over the place! Before I found out it was Chris Stevens, I was like, ‘Man, I really want a grilled cheese sandwich from the Cheesecake factory.” but then after I found out it was Stevens I was all like “Dude, I think I want a bacon cheeseburger from Spagos.” Sometime during his insane rant, I was all like “Homey, Maybe I’m not even hungry. Maybe, I’m just thirsty. I should go to the Key Club.” and then by the end I was thinking “Amigo, if this fat, miscreated, Oklahoman hillbilly doesn’t stop staring at my chest, I’m gonna make what Stevens did to Hoff look like a game of ring around the rosey at a preschool.” Chris Stevens is kinda hot, in the same way that Charles Manson is hot. Which is to say he’s not hot at all. Unless he’s literally caught on fire, in which case I guess he would be pretty hot. Or at least he would be until someone put him out. But would anyone put him out? Like why people go see Dennis Quaid movies, it’s a mystery of the universe, Double T. TAYLOR Krista, your thoughts on last weeks incident as well as your title match against The Original Elite? KRISTA I was as blown away and disgusted by Chris Stevens admission as anyone but let’s find the silver lining in the dark cloud, huh. It’s obvious Hoff isn’t the OAOAST’s version of Colombo but he might be our Santa Claus. Even though I refuse to participate in the celebration of a bastardized holiday that rewards greed above all else, he brought us a nice little early Christmas gift in the form a chair to Tony’s meathead skull right in that sleazeball’s hometown <which is also my hometown, sadly> , a ringpost into Dan Black’s shoulder and finally he beat Zack like he was a jilted lover. When you pile all that on that on top of Zachary being man handled by a poor, feeble, weak, and helpless little girl like myself, it’s been a bad week for the poor Elite. And after checking their horoscope the rest of the month’s not looking much better either. Elite, you used a lot of people as steps on your way to the top. Now that you’re on the way down there’s a lot of people looking to get a piece of you. Lucky for us, we called shotgun on your car ride to hell. ALIX La-me! Somebody needs a bath, because that promo was a stinker! Your name sure ain’t Jackie Gayda, because you definitely aren’t tough enough! Remember, on the Austin scale, you rank closer to Denise then Steve! (Alix walks away humming the tune to Caroline in the city) KIRSTA January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December....*sigh* it’s going to be a long year. TERRY TAYLOR For the OAOAST, I’m Terry Taylor. *cut to commercial* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hoff 0 Report post Posted January 14, 2005 We come back to a shot of the hot Seattle crowd, loving the action! COLE Welcome back, fans, and if you're just joining us, it's been a wild night! CABOOSE Yeah, but guess who's next? Tag champs in the house!! COACH Did you just say "in the house?" CABOOSE !!! Uh...no. No I did not. COACH YOU SO DID!! YEAAAAAH-UH!!! CABOOSE I-- ugh. Caboose hangs his head as we cut to the ring! BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall and it is for the professional wrestling tag team championship of the world! Due to stipulations mandated by the Chairman of the Board, "Cowboy" Bill Watts, all non-wrestling parties have been barred from ringside. When the bell rings your referee in-charge Nick Patrick. Are you ready? Wrestling fans are you ready?! Then for the thousands in attendence and the millions watching around the world, LEEEEET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE! Nirvana's "Heart Shaped Box" hits, and to the chrous of boos, The Saints appear onstage in their Victoria Secret-esque Angel Wings outfits with halo's above their heads. The heavenly duo flamboyantly strut to the ring, seemingly unfazed by the bannings of their Director of Wrestling Operations and Image Consultant. BUFFER Introducing first, the challengers. From Sin City, weighing a combine 448 pounds, Jim Cornette Enterprises in association with Arista Records presents the self-proclaimed "greatest rock 'n' wrestling band of all time"... Synth and Logan, THE SAAAAAINTS! Once in the ring, Synth acts like a long-lost member of The Love Doctors, seductively bumping-and-grinds to the music as he removes his Wings. If Logan "Usher" Mann and Synth are nervous about their big championship match, they aren't showing it. The two stand in the corner, talking. When they're through, they high-five each other and do their own thing. Logan running the ropes, and Synth high-stepping around the ring. COLE This is why The Saints joined Jim Cornette Enterprises at Thanksgiving Star Wars -- for a shot at the World tag team championship. Tonight is the night, but can they defeat the team many believe will go down as the greatest tag team in OAOAST history, the two-time OAOAST World tag team champions, Black T? "Heart Shaped Box" is drowned out by the theme song of the two-time OAOAST tag team champions, "Quiet." Dan Black, in his trademark shades and trenchcoat, and T-Bod emerge on the rampway, looking very convident, as they should be. T-Bod puts his arms out and spins around, the diamond "TB" on the breastpocket and "T-BOD" Hollywood Star logo on the back sparkling under the arena lights. COLE The coolness in the way Black T walk is chilling. They may not be the biggest team in the OAOAST, that designation belongs to Hell's Hitmen, but their no-nonsense we-can-beat-anybody attitude is what makes them so dangerous. The bannings of Jim Cornette, Holly-Wood and Jivin' J.R. clearly plays into the hands of Black T. COACH You know guys, this is a very interesting matchup because of the friendship -- well, I guess acquaintances would be the word, not friendship -- between the two teams. Black T got The Saints into the OAOAST, and even if Black T did promise Synth and Logan a title shot in exchange for taking up the Global Party XChange (as it turned out, GPX made The Saints their bitches and would go on to capture the tag titles in the Summer of 2004), acquaintances are thrown out the window here. Dan and T-Bod consider anybody who try to take away their titles enemies. BUFFER Their opponents. First, from London, England, wearing black, weighing 243 pounds, he is a multi-time tag team champion of the world, "The Ice Heart" DAAAN BLAAACK! His partner, from Hollywood U.S.A., wearing multi-color artwork underneath his gorgeous robe, weighing 292 pounds, he's simply ravishing... TEEE-BOD! Representing The Original Elite, they are former HI-YAH International tag team champions, two-time OAOAST tag team champions and the reigning and defending tag team champions of the world, BLAAACK TEE! Black T step between the ropes, and go right to the center of the ring. Standing back-to-back, Dan Black and T-Bod rotate around the ring as they remove their entrance attire together, revealing the OAOAST Tag Team Titles around their waists. Dan places his shades and trenchcoat on the ring apron, while T-Bod waits for the female ring attendent to come by. Once she arrives he gently hands her his lavish diamond-embroider robe, then swivels his hips a la the late "Ravishing" Rick Rude in front of her, not at all impressing the young lady. But the late "Ravishing" Rick Rude would most certainly be impressed by the artwork on T-Bod's tights -- CoD's faces on the front, their hands in the center of the groin area; OAOAST tag team title on the back, with the faces of every major tag team (GPX, Hell's Hitmen, NNMX, Saints) running down the right and left pant legs with knocked out teeth and bruises on faces. CABOOSE If T-Bod had lived in the 1930s/40s he would of been the envy of the entire block. With those washboard abs, he would of gone to work smelling good, unlike those lazy slobs who refused to seek work, not to mention all the ladies would of flocked to him. COLE I think the depression had a lot to do with those "lazy slobs" not working, but... CABOOSE Ah, everybody has an excuse for everything, Michael Cole. Imagine a super race of T-Bod's or Dan Black's. Now that's a world I'd love to live in -- nothing but beautiful people, like me. COACH That hasn't worked out too well for a few people, especially Hugo Drax. The champs remove their tag titles and tauntingly point them at Synth and Logan, whose wry smile says what they think of the gesture. Referee Nick Patrick takes possesion of the tag team championship and holds them up in the air for all to see, the gold plates on the navy blue leather straps shining under the ring lights. COACH Black T making sure The Saints know they're up against the tag team champions. COLE With Jim Cornette, Holly-Wood and Jivin' J.R. banned from ringside, cameras have been setup in the dressing rooms of both The Saints and Black T. As a matter of fact, let's see what's currently go on backstage. We zoom out into a wide shot, as two boxes appear on the bottom of the screen, blocking out the ring apron. Seated in the locker room of The Saints, Jim Cornette and Holly-Wood are watching this bout in closed-circu televisiont. In the other dressing room, Jivin' J.R. is also seated, but he's not watching the CC feed; he's watching The O.C. J.R. I am cool. I am cool. GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTLY, I AM COOL! COACH Heh. He thinks watching a TV show makes him cool. Cool. CABOOSE Ugh. You sound like that annoying tart, Paris Hilton, with her little "hot" catchphrase. COACH I slept with her. And boy does that girl love to use the "n" word. * DING DING * Dan Black and Synth will start things for their respective teams, and they waste no time locking up. Side headlock by Synth. Black shoves The Synthmeister to the ropes. Shoulderblock by Black sends the flamboyant member of The Saints down. Black hits the ropes just as Synth begins to rise to his feet, but as he sees Dan charging at him out of the corner of his eye, he goes back down. Dan floats over the top. Synth gets back up and ducks his head. Black stops his momentum and double underhooks both of Synth's arms, spinning around counter clockwise and driving Synth facefirst into the mat with a facebuster. PITCH BLACK, a.k.a. Angel Wings! COACH Oh, he hit it early! 1... 2... Dan notices Logan entering the ring and decides to take care of him instead of trying to get an early pin. A running Mann gets bodydrop for his troubles. Dan's partner, T-Bod, enters the ring and knocks Mann back down to the canvas with a roundhouse right. Having recovered after being hit with Pitch Black, a charging Synth spears Black into the corner, ramming the shoulder into the midsection. "The Ice Heart" fights back, thumbing Synth in the eye and then throwing him over the top rope to the floor. Just feet away from Dan, Logan ducks a right by T-Bod. Mann hooks Tony's head with his arms and they both fall down to the mat. The Saints love to execute various neckbreakers. Mann kips up and celebrates his taking down of T-Bod, making sure the fans know he just took down a 6'6", 292 pound man. Not knowing Black's right behind him, he's caught by surprise when Black waistlocks him from behind and lifts him up for a back suplex. However, the 218 pound Mann manages to drop over the top and land on his feet. Side Russian Legsweep. Black cradles his neck after the maneuver. Mann ducks under a running clothesline attempt from T-Bod, who bounces back off the ropes right into a running clothesline from a re-entering Synth. The Synthanator picks Tony "The Body" up and throws him into an opposite corner. Logan "Usher" Mann does the same to T-Bod's partner, Dan Black. The Saints hammer the two-time World's tag team champions in the corner with an array of jabs, kicks, and knife edge chops that echo throughout the arena. Black doubles over after taking a knee to the gut. Logan pounds the back with hard double-axehandles until "The Ice Heart" drops to both knees. Mann shoves Black back against the turnbuckles and delivers a punishing forearm shot to the chest. Synth and Logan glance at one another, making sure they're on the same page, as they Irish whip Dan and T-Bod towards each other...but Black reverses the Irish whip and sends Logan right into the arms of T-Bod... ...OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE SPINEBUSTER! COACH Oh, he hit it early, too! The crowd roars as the impact of T-Bod's spinebuster reverterbates through the arena. Instead of showboating like his opponent earlier on, T-Bod shows his experience by taking Synth out of the picture with a clothesline. He rushes back to his corner so Nick Patrick can focus on the pin in the ring. 1... 2... Synth DIVES on top of Black, breaking up the count with a DOUBLE-AXEHANDLE to the upper back; surprisingly to a LOUD pop. COLE T-Bod said there wouldn't be a good guy/bad guy scenerio in this match, and the fans have apparently picked The Saints as the team they'll cheer for. I guess it must be the underdog factor, since it surely isn't both teams humanitarian efforts. COACH That's not exactly true, Mikey. The Saints have been known to give to their fans. CABOOSE Yeah, and their fans have been known to give right back -- in the form of crabs. And I don't mean the type you eat. Remember School's Out 2004? As the referee escorts Synth back to his corner, Black T once again show their ring savvy by dragging Logan to their corner and then making a tag. T-Bod comes in and rakes the laces of the boot across the eyes of Logan, then bodyslams him to the mat. T-Bod repeatedly drives the forearm into the throat of Mann, receiving a stern warning from Nick Patrick. T-Bod stands over Mann, swiveling his hips as he tells Logan to "Go ahead and showboat now, jackass!" Mann reaches out and grabs hold of T-Bod's balls! COLE His eyes -- T-Bod's eyes look like they're about to burst out of their sockets. COACH If he squeezes any harder, it ain't gonna be orange juice that comes out. Logan uses his legs to hook the arms of Tony and drop him to the mat, a sitting sunset flip. 1... 2... T-Bod slaps his thighs against Logan's head, causing Mann to release the hold. Logan rolls on his back and catches a still hurting T-Bod with a kick and then whips him to the -- no, T-Bod counters the Irish whip attempt! POWERSLAM! 1... 2... KICKOUT! COLE Not only did T-Bod not hook the leg, but he didn't bother to put all his weight down on Logan, which allowed him some breathing room to kick out. Very rare mistake by the team of Black T. T-Bod tags in Dan, who immediately climbs to the top. TOP ROPE DIVING HEADBUTT! 1... 2... Synth comes in and breaks up the count, stomping Black on the head. Black lifts Mann up...FALCON ARROW (release vertical suplex). Black double underhooks the legs and rolls Logan on his back. BOSTON CRAB. CABOOSE If you've noticed -- and you probably haven't because you two haven't a clue about wrestling, whereas I'm a two-time World's heavyweight champion -- Black T have implemented a strategy made famous by the Andersons: focusing in on one part of the body. In this case, the back. Dan soften up the back with a Falcon Arrow, and just minutes before T-Bod hit a powerslam. All of this led to the Boston Crab. This is what makes Black T so good. Their strategy is to not allow their opponents to make frequent tags, thus isolating a member of the opposing team. Whether you like them or not, Dan Black and T-Bod are thinking man's wrestlers. "Give it up, you little bastard!" Black shouts at Mann, who's screaming in pain but refusing to submit. Dan motions to Tony, who jumps in the ring and spits at Synth, suckering him into the ring. Black releases the Boston Crab and slaps his hands together, while T-Bod applies a CAMEL CLUTCH on Mann. Referee Nick Patrick turns around and notices Dan and T-Bod have switch places. Patrick questions both men, but Dan tells him they tagged, citing his bogus tag. Patrick allows the switch. COLE What a horrible call by one of the better referee's in the business. The rulebook clearly states the referee must see the tag. Nick Patrick just took the word of Dan Black. CABOOSE Why shouldn't he? Dan Black is an English gentleman. Outside of the Japanese, the English are the most honest people on the planet. T-Bod grimances, as he cranks back on the neck of Logan Mann. Tony lets go of the hold and drives the elbow into the back of the head. Tony "The Body" now dropping the knee into the spine of the back. Black T have dominated this match from the start. The experience of Dan and T-Bod showing throughout the match. T-Bod goes back to the camel clutch, this time making sure Logan stares directly in his corner. Synth becomes irate after T-Bod blows him a kiss. Logan tries to power out of it (camel clutch) but T-Bod drops his BUTT across the back, keeping Logan grounded. Synth attempts to get his partner going by slapping the top turnbuckle, which also manages to get the crowd behind the flamboyant rulebreakers. Split-screen: Jim Cornette asks Holly-Wood what's Synth doing, in reference to the fans getting behind them, while Jivin' J.R. is now watching Toy Story on DVD. J.R. Buzz Lightyear to the rescue! COLE That man is from another planet. CABOOSE No, he's from Jiveliva. Home of such talent as Nathan Jones and A-Train. Remember A-Train? COACH Choo-Choo! The energy of the crowd riles Logan up, who tries to power out of the camel clutch one more time, but T-Bod once again comes crashing down on -- NO! Logan rolled on his back just as T-Bod was coming down, and all The Body landed on was Mann's shins. LEFT HOOK! BOOM! T-Bod falls to the mat. COLE He got him with that vicious left hand! Both men are down. But T-Bod is the closest to his corner. Black T with the tag. Dan comes in, and Logan DIVES at his corner. The EXPLODES as Logan MAKES THE TAG! Synth comes in a house afire. He takes Black down with a right. T-Bod goes down. Black goes back down. Synth brings Black T together for a meeting of the minds. DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER! T-Bod falls to the outside. Dan staggers off the ropes and walks right into a front facelock. COLE He's going for Percussion! Black counters it into a NORTHERN LITES SU -- NO, in mid-air Synth counters it into PERCUSSION (DDT)! COLE He hit it! And he has Black pinned. COACH Oh, my God! I never expected to see this. Out of nowhere, "NARCISSISTIC" NED appears on the ring apron, wearing a bandage over his eye due to the First Blood match at Climax. Nick Patrick orders him to leave, but Ned keeps pointing behind him. Synth gets off of Dan and exchanges words with Ned, who keeps pointing behind him. T-Bod is in the ring with one of the TAG TITLES. He's gonna nail Synth from behind. "SARCASTIC" SIMON, with TENNIS RACKET, comes into the picture and turns T-Bod around. Synth turns around to see what Ned keeps pointing at just as T-Bod ducks... BOOM! "Sarcastic" Simon BLASTS Synth with the RACKET! The crowd erupts in BOOS. They don't want to see it end like this. T-Bod tosses Simon out of the ring, and places Dan on top of Synth. He throws Logan into Ned, and both men fall to the floor. Cut quick backstage shows Cornette freaking out, screaming at Holly. We cut back to the ring, where Nick Patrick is about to make the count. 1... 2... 3! * DING DING DING * BOO! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winners, and STILL OAOAST tag team champions of the world, BLACK T! COLE Unbelieveable! Black T have retained the tag titles thanks to the returning New New Midnight Express. Simon and Ned have fled the scene of the crime... CABOOSE Oh, don't go starting trouble, Cole. It's very clear to me that "Narcissistic" Ned jumped on the apron to warn Synth that T-Bod was sneaking up behind him with the belt. Simon came in to help Synth but T-Bod's sixth sense told him to duck and Synth ended up getting popped. COLE With all that's gone down between The Saints and New New Midnight Express, you expect me to believe that. CABOOSE I'm not expecting you to believe anything, I'm just telling you what I saw. At least hide you bias, Cole. ZACK MALIBU and CANDIE come out from the back to celebrate with Black T. Malibu has a huge grin on his face, clapping his hands as he nears his fellow Original Elite members. The Original Elite know they just escaped one helluva scare. Zack rips the World tag team titles out of Nick Patrick's hands, pushing him away. Zack personally delivers the championships to Dan and T-Bod and congratulates them both. Dan and T-Bod embrace each other and kiss the belts before raising them in the air in victory. With a million dollar smile, Candie pats Dan and T-Bod on the back and gives them a peck on the cheek, with T-Bod timing the peck so he could kiss her on the lips. Zack, Dan, T-Bod and Candie get a good chuckle out of it. COLE The Original Elite are still your OAOAST tag team champions, but for how long? *cut to commercial* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hoff 0 Report post Posted January 14, 2005 The lights turn purple and some stereotypical Asian music plays making the crowd go dead silent. A large South Korea flag hangs in front of the entrance way, lightly flapping in the air thanks to two small fans underneath the staging floor. COLE Coming up we have a match for the most valuable title in the OAOAST, the Women’s Title! This contest pits Holly-Wood against Queen of the Korean Deathmatches, Lioness! Lioness was deemed so violent and her matches were considered so disturbing that she was banned from competing in her home country! If anyone is caught viewing one of her matches, they’ll be arrested and convicted of treason! Not arrested and put on trail but arrested and convicted without a trial! All records of her fighting in any wrestling matches in South Korea have been burned by the country’s government. The oversized flag drops to floor, crumpling in a large pile. The entrance doors part and out steps the dangerous Lioness. I don’t think I overexaggerate when I say that Lioness is without a shadow of a doubt the ugliest women you’ve ever laid eyes on, and knowing the lot of you that encompasses a massive amount of booger bears and dime store hoes. Her body, mutilated by barbwire matches, is lined with ghastly scars. She has a unibrow thicker then Beyonce’s ass. Her arm pits haven’t been shaved since The Maple Leafs last won the Stanley Cup (1967) and she’s carrying more fat on her then a bucket of lard. I can feel my horse sized dick going limp just writing about her. BUFFER THE FOLLOWING IS AN OAOAST WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH! Now making her way to the ring from Seoul, South Korea...weighing in at an even two hundred pounds, she is the Queen of the deathmatch, the Seoul Slasher.....LIONESSSSSS! CABOOSE What the fuck is that? COLE I know Michael lost a step when it comes to the introductions but you don’t have be insulting. CABOOSE Not that. I’m talking about that beast waddling down the entrance ramp. WHAT IS THAT? COLE That’s the Lioness! COACH Man, The Lioness is supposed to be a girl! That’s not a Chick Over Dick, that’s a chick with a dick! Man, holla! COLE She is not a man, Jonathan. COACH Prove it. COLE How? COACH Go pull down “her” pants. See if “she’s” packing some meat heat. Whereas her body is a mangled car wreck, her tights are Gainsboroguh’s Blue Boy in comparison. A sleeveless body suit that runs down just past her thighs, they are adorned with beautiful airbrushings of lions and tigers. The sterotypical Asian music that no one could hear in the first place comes to an end and we can hear how embarrassingly quiet the crowd is. Whoever’s idea it was to bring back the women’s title is a fucking genius! Oh wait.... The recognizable to an enfant intro of State of love and trust by Pearl Jam hits and the Women’s Champion, Holly-Wood, is in the house! Wearing a white bikini top and baggy black leather pants, Holly carries her diamond encrusted title on her shoulder. Her expression, as always, is one of apathy, apparently not concerned with the lethal competitor the OAOAST has presented her with. BUFFER And the champion....from Hollywood, California....she appears courtesy of Arista Records, she is The Saints image consultant...HOLLY-WOOOOOOOOOD! COLE Pearl Jam? That’s played out. Velvet Revolver is the bomb, my dogs! COACH Well, there’s another CD I have to throw out. Tell me you don’t like Gwen Stefani, because I didn’t pay thirty five bucks for that special edition CD just to toss it in the garbage because you wanna hop on the bandwagon. Eddie Vedder’s vocals continue to serenade the arena as Holly walks down the entrance ramp. I wish I had more to say, but Holly doesn’t have an interesting entrance. COACH Boy, did you guys see the party the Saints had going on earlier? Man oh man! Brianna Banks, Devon, Sky Lopez., ass and titty over load! Someone call Jules Jordan and get a film crew down to the Key Arena! My brain nearly blew up watching that hot stuff! You think Holly enjoyed that pre match party? COLE I have a hard time believing Holly has a good time doing anything. COACH I had a hard time watching the footage of that party. If ya know what I mean... CABOOSE I think Lioness had a similar “hard time”, Coach. COLE Stop it. With the fighters in the ring, referee Mike Awesome(!) calls for the bell! ding ding ding COLE There’s the bell! CABOOSE I’d love some Taco Bell, thank you for asking. The match begins with the same collar and elbow tie up that eighty five percent of every match in the history of pro wrestling has begun with. The two women (I hesitated to use that word to describe the challenger) fight over it as if was some irreplaceable work of art. Holly spins behind Lioness, where she hooks on a waistlock! Lioness grabs Holly’s hands and tries to forcefully break her grip, but Holly digs in and withstands her rival’s escape attempt! Lioness does this for about twenty more seconds and the crowd isn’t terribly thrilled with the boring start. Sensing what her opponent can’t pick up on, that they’re about to kill a previously red hot crowd, Holly breaks her own waistlock, snatches Lioness into a full nelson then slams the South Korean fighter into the mat with a full nelson suplex! Lioness lands head first onto the mat and her neck twists awkwardly under the weight of her own grotesque body! She grimaces as the pain burns her upper body that has been put through so much hell over the years! COLE That’s a nice way to start the match! The fans, who’s energy needed life support, seem to think so and woke up after the brutal neck drop. Holly stomps away at Lioness, driving eight or nine kicks into her opponent’s already hurt neck! The queen of the deathmatches sees that her adversary refuses to relent her assault, so she rolls away to put some distance between them. Holly stalks her across the ring, unwilling to let her momentum die. As soon as the champion moves in however, Lioness hops to her feet and slams her knee into Holly’s midsection! Slumped over, Holly gets grabbed into a DDT set up! Unfortunately for the grizzled Lioness, Holly isn’t nearly as stunned as she would like and the Seoul Slasher gets shoved into the ropes by her younger enemy! Although her potential momentum shifting move was countered, Lioness maintains her confident composure and jumps onto Holly for a what looks to be a hurricanarana! But instead of pulling Holly into a pin fall as she and everyone else in the arena expected her to do, Lioness swings out to the side, falls backfirst to the mat and grabs a hold of the still standing Holly’s arm and locks her into a dreadful armbar! “God damn it!” Holly hollers, contrasting her normally ice cold attitude. Battling to regain the tempo of the match, Holly slowly lurches to the ropes, dragging Lioness like a ball and chain attached to her ankle. Lines of worry sprout on Holly’s delicate face as her self inflicted pressure to retain the Women’s title starts to get to her in the face of a match ending submission. The agony of the hold continuing to mount and showing no signs of stopping, Holly extends her arm and grabs the top rope achieving salvation! COLE She made the ropes. COACH Cool. CABOOSE (very angry at Coach’s new catchphrase) GWARRRRR!!! COACH Gwar’s alright but I prefer Children of Bodom for my death metal fix. Cool. After giving a clean break, Lioness whips a swift kick at the arm she just targeted! The blow stings Holly as though an entire bee hive converged to drive their stingers into her arm. The depraved challenger continues to be aggressive throwing kick’s like baseballs at Holly’s bare arm! Lioness rears back for particularly nasty roundhouse, but Holly is waiting with a kick of her own! She leaps into the air and tags her two hundred pound challenger with an agile spinning back kick! The strike snaps Lioness’ neck back like a ball bounced off a brick wall! Her eyes glazed over, she stands tall but not dangerous. Holly spins around and nails her in the gut with a standing spinning back kick! She follows that up with a needlessly stiff high kick to the jaw! The sickening sound of Holly’s boot meeting Lioness’ jaw is music to the carnage lusting crowd’s ear. Blood spills out of her mouth as her dark lips are stained with the crimson goo. Holly works fast and unyielding, making Lioness’ life miserable with another spinning back kick. The grappler doubles over, but apparently she has just a little bit of fight left in her as she surprises Holly with an arm drag! Holly flops to the mat, completely shocked and angered and what just transpired! Lioness applies a desperation armbar, but Holly, wanting to send her opponent back to Korea ASAP makes a quick scramble for the ropes! COLE She got to the rope. CABOOSE Who’s got dope? COLE I said ‘rope’. COACH Cool. With team Holly-Wood closing in on Team Lioness’ endzone, both women stand upright. They shoot each other menacing glances and resume their battle! Lioness throws out a Zack Malibu inspired super kick but Holly catches her foot! Lioness quickly shakes her head from side to side, perhaps silently begging for Holly to let her go free! That’s one wish that won’t be granted as Holly pulls Lioness towards her, then lifts her onto her shoulders! The fans rise to their feet, because they know that whenever someone gets into a standing fireman’s carry position, some bad ass shit’s gonna go down! Holly hooks Lioness’ neck and leg while the South Korean makes every effort to free herself from Holly’s clutches! Holly steps towards the center of the ring, while bright camera flashes litter the stands with their white glow. She lets go of Lioness’ legs and rotates the challenger’s body upside down and facing away from hers. She grabs Lioness by her meaty torso and then sits down, spiking her head and neck into the concrete hard mat with a career killing pile driver! CABOOSE That’s the Psycho Driver! COACH AKA the Argentine Back Breaker Rack Piledriver. CABOOSE Well, excuse me, Mike f’n Tenay! Whatever you want to call it, it impresses the hell out of the jaded Seattle fans and they explode with cheers for the innovative maneuver! Holly hooks the leg and goes a for a pin! 1 2 3!!!! BUFFER You’re winner and still OAOAST’s WOMEN’S CHAMPION......HOLLY-WOOOOOD! The respectful OAOAST faithful give Holly a nice round of applause as the victorious champion is awarded her diamond adorned belt. COLE Folks, a successful first title defense for Holly-Wood. We’d like to thank Lioness, Queen of the deathmatch... COACH Hey it’s the Queen of HeldDOWN! COLE Candie? What’s she doing out here? She has a chair! Oh come on! That’s too much! That is henious! Candie is smashing Lioness’s back with that chair! She’s a guest of the OAOAST! Show some respect! “CANDIE SWALLOWS! CANDIE SWALLOWS!” The crowds chants are ignored by their target as Candie tosses Lioness over the ropes and to the floor, rudely ridding the ring of the International wrestler’s presence. CABOOSE I think Lioness was an appetizer! Holly-Wood is the main course! COACH Uncool. CABOOSE Maybe she’ll get you for dessert. Candie takes a huge home run swing at Holly’s head! Strike one, Candie misses completely! She’s red in the face, flush with an unusual anger that’s normally reserved for her unstable boyfriend, Zack Malibu! Her eyes narrowed into enraged slits, Candie takes another swipe at Holly’s face! Holly moves quick but not quick enough to stop the weapon from grazing her chin! She clumsily drops to the ground, clutching her bruised chin and letting the title belt, her best tool of defense, leave her endangered possession! “CANIDE DOES CREAMPIES! CANDIE DOES CREAMPIES!” Holly starts to back away from Candie, but with no where to go and no where to hide, she’s easy picking for HeldDOWN’s patriarch. Candie cocks her arms and then blasts Holly straight in the face with a brutal steel chair shot! KO’ed Holly falls to the mat like her face had met with a bullet. Her pretty blue eyes roll to the back of her head, while the Seattle fans mince no words in expressing their hatred for Zack’s better half, Candie. Displaying the arrogance that made her the most hated woman in wrestling, the blond bombshell struts around Holly’s lifeless body, observing the misery she’s wrought and drawing a disturbing satisfaction from her misdeeds. Her purple lips forming a devious grin, Candie extends Holly’s arm with her boot. It’s the same arm that Lioness targeted for submission in their title match. The fans having a good idea of what ungodly act is forthcoming are less then pleased, but are helpless to halt Candie’s wicked one woman slaughter! She takes the top of the chair and violently slams it down on Holly’s arm, generating a wretched cracking sound as steel meets human bone! And she does it again! And again! And again! Holly is of course expressionless, but Candie is in no such state! Cold, cruel and callous beyond repair, Candie derives an immense pleasure from being responsible for the destruction of the Women’s Champion! The crowd, almost out of breath, find their boos barely come out as a whimper, presenting little resistance to Candie’s maniacal stampede. The deplorable diva brushes a strand of gorgeous blond hair away from her face then hits Holly’s mangled arm for the fourth and final time! CANDIE HITS HOLLY WITH A FALLING STAR DRIVER ONTO THE STEEL CHAIR! COLE No! That is wrong! Very wrong! Finally the backstage staff has hit the ring! Candie is leaving willingly, but she’s smiling like she did nothing wrong! That frankly makes me sick! CABOOSE Boo-hoo, Cole! Candie just put herself in position for a Women’s Title shot! Gotta love that! The Saints go down hard against Black T and now Holly gets torn to shreds by Candie. An absolute terrible night for the gang from Arista Records. COACH And it started off so...how shall I say...cool? Caboose punches Coach. COLE We've got more matches yet, so stay with us! *commercial* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hoff 0 Report post Posted January 14, 2005 BUFFER The following contest is a special challenge match for the HI-YAH International Tag Team Championship. Already in the ring the challengers, at a total combined weight of 545lbs, from Japan, Goro Kagoshima & Kenji Yamagata! The two Japanese warriors don't react to the crowd who give them a respectful round of applause. BUFFER And their opponents! Cue: "Calling Dr. Love" BUFFER From Chicago, Illinois and accompanied by Dr. Feelgood, at a total combined weight of 445lbs, Dr. Steven Pigley and Dr. Max Anderson, the HI-YAH International Tag Team Champions - THE LUUUUUUUUUUURVE DOCTORS! The Docs burst through a huge blast of pyro, dancing wildly on the stage along with Dr. Feelgood. COLE There they are, the new HI-YAH tag team champions! Fresh off that huge win over Black T at Christmas Climaxxx! CABOOSE That fluke win, you mean? COLE The Docs won the match clean, 1-2-3 in the middle of the ring. CABOOSE And let's watch them lose this match clean, 1-2-3 in the middle of the ring. The Docs take their white coats off, garnering screams of appreciation from the female fans. Wearing matching bright blue tights, they enter the ring and immediately look serious, holding up their HI-YAH title belts. Kagoshima and Yamagata are clad in matching red and black tights. Kagoshima sports long hair and a goatee, while Yamagata wears a red mask trimmed with gold. Each at over 250lbs and 6 foot. the challengers look at their opponents and bow respectfully. The moment the Docs turn, however, the Japanese attack from behind, slamming the champs down to the mat. COLE Oh come on! These guys are supposed to be honorable! CABOOSE Why should they be? Let me tell you about Kagoshima and Yamagata. These guys are one of the top tag teams in Japan, and two time former HI-YAH Tag Champions themselves. And from speaking to them earlier tonight (In Japanese), I can tell you that they're far from happy seeing a pair of dancing idiots like the Quacks walking around with their promotions titles. COLE The Docs may like to dance and have a good time, but we've seen how seriously take their wrestling, and the Japanese may have a surprise if they take them lightly. Kagoshima and Yamagata stomp the Docs down as our referee Nick Patrick gets the match underway. *DING DING DING* Patrick yells at the challengers to get one of them out of the ring, and Yamagata obliges, but not before throwing Max Anderson out over the top rope to the floor. Kagoshima brings Steven Pigley up to his feet and lashes him with a hard chop, then a headbutt that sends Pigley staggering into a vacant corner. Kagoshima flays the Doc's chest with another chop and then whips him across the ring to his teams corner, where Yamagata snaps him down to the mat with a handful of Pigley's dark hair. Patrick remonstrates with the masked man as Pigley crawls into a stinkface style position in the corner. Kagoshima runs off the ropes and delivers a brutal drop kick into the face of the seated Doctor. COLE That was a hell of a drop kick. Pigley's head got snapped back hard. CABOOSE I hope he knows a good plastic surgeon. Do you see now why the Docs have no chance? Kagoshima tags Yamagata, and the two men whip Pigley to the ropes. Dr. Steven ducks their lariat as they return, however, nails both men with a drop-sault, one boot each. With the Japanese staggered, Pigley leg sweeps Yamagata and then takes Kagoshima over with a frankensteiner so that Kagoshima lands directly on Yamagata! Pigley then follows with a standing star press onto the back of Kagoshima! Patrick counts it! ONE! TWO! No! Yamagata got a shoulder up! COLE Great thinking from Pigley. Yamagata had the weight of two men on him, making it hard to kick out. That's a heavy weight, I can tell you from experience! CABOOSE You wish. Pigley picks Kagoshima up and throws him out of the ring before turning his attentions to Yamagata, but the masked man quickly pokes him in the eye and executes a snap suplex. Yamagata runs the ropes and delivers a Muta style power elbow into a cover: ONE! TWO! Kickout! Yamagata grunts and brings Pigley up, but the Doc evades his following punch and rolls quickly forward to tag Max Anderson. Dr. Max springboards into the ring and takes Yamagata over with a quick series of deep arm drags, followed by a leg lariat that sends Yamagata sliding out of the ring next to his partner Kagoshima. Anderson looks at the pair, nods, and jumps to the apron, hitting a text book Asai moonsault down onto both men, crushing them into the arena floor. Dr. Anderson picks himself up and rolls Yamagata back into the ring, where a swift cover gets only 2. Max brings the masked man to his feet and whips him into the corner, before running in with an RVD style monkey flip to bring him back out again. Anderson stalks Yamagata, waiting for him to get to his feet, and then drills him with a superkick! Yamagata collapses into the corner and Max points to the top rope to a POP from the fans. COLE Anderson wants that 450 splash he calls Shock Therapy, and if he hits it- CABOOSE Yamagata would kick out. Duh. COACH You can't deny the Docs have more than held their own in this match so far. CABOOSE They've thrown a few moves at the challengers, sure, but no real punishment. They're not really capable of that. Max climbs to the top rope, but Kagoshima sneaks around the floor and pushes him off to the mat. Anderson rolls through the fall and doesn't sustain much damage - but does when Yamagata meets him with thunderous lariat that spins him 360. Dr. Pigley holds his head in dismay and starts to call for the tag as Yamagata brings Anderson up. The masked man applies a front face lock and nails Anderson with a brain buster into a cover: ONE! TWO! THRR- Kickout! Both men up, and Yamagata underhooks both of Anderson's arms and executes a chicken wing suplex, again into a cover: ONE! TWO! THR- Kickout! Yamagata brings Dr. Max up and this time grabs him in, hitting an Exploder suplex that drops Anderson right on the back of his head! Cover! ONE! TWO! THREEEE- Kickout! CABOOSE What is wrong with Nick Patrick! Does he need a new arm, or something? Can he only hit the mat twice before it seizes up? COLE C'mon, Anderson is a tough, tough man! Yamagata gets to his feet and looks at the prone body of Anderson, and shakes his head, before tagging in Kagoshima. Anderson somehow crawls up to a kneeling position, but this is a bad move, as it provides a huge target for Kagoshima to land one, two, three hard kicks into his chest and then a fourth directly into the side of the head. Anderson collapses forwards, and Kagoshima rolls him onto his back for a cover: ONE! TWO! Pigley breaks it up with a boot to the back of Kagoshima, who makes a grab for Dr. Steven. Pigley evades, and with Kagoshima kneeling nails a Shining Wizard from close range! Without a run up theres not much power behind it, and Kagoshima is only briefly knocked down, but there's enough time for Pigley to drag Max into the Doc's corner and tag himself in! Dr. Feelgood cheers Pigley on as he lands a series of forearm shots on Kagoshima, followed by a jaw breaker. As Kagoshima staggers away Pigley applies a waistlock, but its quickly reversed by his opponent who tries for a German suplex, but Pigley flips out and lands on his feet. Kagoshima runs at Dr. Steven, who gives him a drop toe hold and then a spinning leg drop to the back of the head. Pigley climbs to the top rope and waits for Kagoshima to rise, before leaping off with a 'rana attempt - but Kagoshima catches him and turns it into a vicious powerbomb! Cover! ONE! TWO! THREE! No! Shoulder up! Kagoshima brings Pigley up and tags his partner. The two both grab Dr. Steven around the throat, and hoist him up for a double choke slam - but Max Anderson runs in with kicks to the stomachs of both men, allowing Pigley to fall to the mat. Dr. Steven grabs Kagoshima and, using the ropes for lift, hits him with a Tornado DDT, while Anderson runs the ropes and flattens Yamagata with a Yakuza Kick! CABOOSE Get Anderson out of the ring, that's illegal! COLE So's what you take backstage. COACH Hah, owned! There's a "clonk" sound of two heads being knocked together. Pigley quickly throws Kagoshima out of the ring and sets Yamogata over his knees in the Death Sentence/Vegomatic position. Anderson vaults to the top rope - Shooting Star Elbow to Yamogata - The Lethal Injection! Pigley rolls forward, covering! ONE! TWO! Kagoshima comes back in for the save! Max drills him back out with another Yakuza kick! THREE! *DING DING DING* BUFFER The winners of the match and still HI-YAH Tag Team Champions - Max Anderson, Steven Pigley - the LUUUUUUUUUUUUURVE DOC-TORS! The Docs embrace and grab their title belts from the referee. COLE A succesful first title defence from the Love Doctors! I can't wait to see what they do next. In fact, I'm booking into the Windy City Hospital just so I can meet them up close and personal! I'm going to wear special underwear, and - CABOOSE Cut his mic. Go to something else. Please. *commercial* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hoff 0 Report post Posted January 14, 2005 Backstage in Bill Watts' always busy office, the OAOAST head honcho looks to have a lot on his mind tonight. With good reason, it has to be said. The last thing he needs right now is for Panther and the OAOAST X-Division Champion Leon Rodez to have both come to his office, both looking for Watts to sort something out for them. But sure enough, there they are. WATTS So, let me get this straight...you want your match with Zack next week? Leon nods, as Watts turns to Panther who stands across the room from Rodez. WATTS And, you want a match with Zack too, next week? Panther nods. WATTS So, you both want this match with Zack...both next week, both one on one. You can see the problem I'm in guys. And obviously, I want to keep everyone happy. That's my job. But, obviously, I can't book Zack in two matches on one show. That just can't happen. PANTHER You know you could give Bryte the match with Rodez instead. From across the room, Rodez smiles at Panther. A smile that doesn't seem all that friendly, but a smile nonetheless. RODEZ Wouldn't it make more sense if YOU faced Bryte. After all, you are the guy who's been feuding with him for the past half a year. PANTHER We settled that a couple of weeks ago though. I'd be happy to face Bryte, don't get me wrong Bill. But the fact is, I've beaten Bryte time and time and time again, so I don't NEED to face him. Zack, I haven't fought in some considerable time. So I need the match, so I can sort out some strategy, get som...look, I don't need to explain myself Bill... RODEZ I did ask first. Now it's Panther who smiles, almost sneers, at Rodez and his interruption. PANTHER What is this, pre-school? RODEZ You know, I guess I shouldn't be TOO surprised. After all, you were running in on my business all the way back in June...it's not like it's a new occurence. PANTHER Excuse me? RODEZ When I was wrestling Bryte at... WATTS Fellahs, please! As Watts speaks up, Rodez and Panther finally stop and both turn to him, Watts sighing. The last thing he needs is to be getting aggravated right now. WATTS Panther, you want Zack. Rodez, you want Zack. But I can't give you him in a singles match. Rodez rolls his eyes as Panther looks on, curiously. WATTS And I don't want you putting that X-Division Title on the line with the Anglepalooza match so close Leon. So next week...it will be Panther! A smile emerges on Panther's face as again Rodez's eyes roll skywards and he sighs. WATTS TEAMING... A sigh which disappears as Panther's smile does the same. WATTS ...with Leon Rodez! And together, you two will GET Zack Malibu! As it'll be Panther and Leon Rodez, teaming up up to take on Zack Malibu...and his partner...Chris Bryte! Next week! Live, on HeldDOWN~! Now how does that sound? Both men mumble some sort of happiness with the decision, not exactly what they were looking for, but more than enough of a consolation. Watts takes the mumbles as a 'thank you' and smiles back at the two men, who have already started to exchange a glance towards each other. -------------- COLE Can you believe that guys!?! Next week, Panther teams up with Leon Rodez to take on Zack Malibu and Chris Bryte! The four men who will do battle over the X-Division Championship of the world at AnglePalooza...will ALL be in the SAME ring, NEXT WEEK! COACH It's all gonna break down next week in...what...whatever town we're in next week. (Quick sponsorship ads are shown, as well as an exterior shot of the arena.) We come back to HeldDOWN~! with a shot of the live crowd! Amidst the shots of screaming, racuous fans, the camera settles in on various signs deriding Chris Stevens and signing Hoff's praises. COLE Fans, welcome back to HeldDown, and if you missed last week's show, you missed an unforgettable turn of events. LAST WEEK The crowd EXPLODES as Sevendust's "Black" coarses through the arena!! COLE OH MY GOD!! COACH HERE HE COMES!! In the ring, Zack looks up, bewildered...then horrified as Hoff charges out from behind the curtain! Carrying a steel chair, Hoff heads down the ramp to a HUGE ovation, but gets cut off at the pass by T-Bod... *CRACK* And T-Bod goes DOWN after a BRUTAL chairshot!! The steel folds as it lands on T-Bod's skull. Hoff throws the bent chair down, then keeps charging, only to be met by Dan Black! *CLANG* And Black goes DOWN after being FLUNG into the ringpost! The fans are at a fever pitch as Hoff slides into the ring!! COLE THIS IS ELECTRIC!! CABOOSE Oh, God....RUN, ZACK!! RUN!! YOU'RE THE FRANCHISE!! Hoff pops to his feet and GLARES at Zack, who looks up at him with slightly frantic eyes. COLE Zack Malibu had better start praying!! CABOOSE WHY DOESN'T HE RUN?! COACH Maybe Hoff will listen to reason! CABOOSE Oh, God... Zack looks around him, at the carnage, and then back at Hoff who takes a step forward. The crowd is yelling themselves hoarse, BEGGING Hoff to take a shot at Malibu. Zack oh-so-hesitantly steps toward a fuming Hoff, and throws his hands up, trying desparately to explain himself and heed off the attack. Hoff simply stares at him, eyes wide and angry, while Zack keeps explaining, and begins YELLING, pointing in different directions, and screaming "it wasn't me!" CABOOSE LISTEN TO HIM!! Hoff shakes his head and CLOTHESLINES Zack Malibu out of his boots!! Zack flips inside out, flopping onto the canvas to a MONSTROUS reaction! The crowd is chanting Hoff's name as the big man SCREAMS for Zack to get up!! Malibu, stumbles to his feet, and turns around...RIGHT INTO A BIG RIGHT HAND!! Hoff fires another, and another, and ANOTHER< and Zack is REELING as he stumbles into the ropes! Hoff grabs him by the arm and whips him acorss the ring! Zack comes rebouding off the far side...into a HUGE SPINEBUSTER!!!!! "HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF!" COACH GOOD LORD!! Zack's back arches from the impact, before he turns over and flops onto his stomach, unmoving. Hoff looks down at him in a blinding fury, and...slides out of the ring. COLE What the hell? The fans murmur...then ERUPT as Hoff GRABS ANOTHER CHAIR!! COLE Ohhhh-ho-ho yeah!! CABOOSE Now COME ON!!! THIS IS ENOUGH! COLE Get him, Hoff! Make that son of a bitch pay!! The crowd is electric as Hoff slides into the ring with the chair and stands up. Hoff crawls behind Zack and starts SCREAMING for Zack to get up! Hoff clangs the chair against the mat before setting back up again, waiting...waiting...waiting....as Zack finally gets up, turns around, and *WHAM* gets laid out by a GIGANTIC chairshot that sends a cheer through the crowd!! Hoff throws down the chair as Zack crumples to the canvas. The crowd is ecstatic as Hoff looks out over them...back and forth...before stretching his arm out to the side, thumb in the air. CABOOSE NOT THIS TOO!! Hoff smiles, a sick, anrgy smile, before turning his thumb down to the biggest pop in the history of crowd noise. COLE YES! One Future Shock coming up!! The first one in MONTHS!!! CABOOSE Dammit, you've made your point!! Hoff grabs Zack and pulls him up, standing behind him. Hoff hooks Zack from behind and the crowd goes wild!! Hoff lifts Zack up in the reverse suplex position and holds him.... holds him.... holds him.... and brings him DOWN ONTO HIS HEAD with the FUTURE SHOCK!! The crowd ERUPTS as Hoff hits the big move, then gets to his feet, looking down at Zack. Hoff nods, smiling the same angry smile, and-- CUE: "Bound for the Floor" COLE Wait, what the hell is this? COACH Chris Stevens? The fans' rabid cheering turns to booing as Hoff looks up to the ramp, locking eyes with, as always, a well-dressed Chris Stevens. Stevens smirks as he holds a mic in hand. COLE Why is he out here now? Hoff looks bewildered at thelatest development. Stevens lifts the mic to his lips: STEVENS Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, the return of HOFF!!! "BOOOOOOOO!!" Hoff cocks his head, looking incredulously at Stevens. COACH Guys, what is this? STEVENS And Hoff, give yourself a round of applause. You did, I mean, one HELL of a job of taking out Zack Malibu. You got your revenge. Stevens claps as Hoff continues to look dumbfounded, but the crowd cheers the sentiments, as they loved every minute of the beatdown. STEVENS But you got the wrong guy. The crowd goes silent. Hoff looks at Stevens for another second....before his jaw hits the ground. COLE Wait...is he saying... STEVENS That's right, big man. I see you finally figured it out. You never were very smart. But just in case I'm wrong, let me spell it out for you. Hoff...I laid you out, all those months ago. I did it. Me. The crowd roars in shock. Hoff's eyes grow like saucers as he looks at Stevens. STEVENS I mean, did you have any proof that it was Zack Malibu? Anything at all? No. You big idiot, you didn't need any. Well, look what you've done now. Hoff looks around the ring, shock passing over his face. T-Bod and Dan Black are still down on the outside, and Zack Malibu isn't moving in the ring. STEVENS That's right, take it all in. God, you know, Hoff, you were just so damn easy to manipulate, it's almost a shame. You let yourself believe what you were gonna believe, while all the while, the truth was right here in front of you. But you never even tried to find the truth, did you, Hoff? You never talked to the cops...you never did a damn thing. Because...deep down...you wanted it to be Zack Malibu. Hoff, still looking down at Zack, gently shakes his head no. STEVENS Don't lie to me, big boy! We all saw it. You were sick of Zack, and you wanted to take him out. I just gave you a reason. So there you go, Hoff. You got your wish. But what about me, Hoff? What am I going to do now? Because, whatever I do to you, it isn't enough! IT'S NEVER ENOUGH!!! Hoff looks up at Stevens, now, with tears in his eyes. STEVENS I beat you, on pay-per-view, and you get the title shot!! I take you out, and you won't stay down! What IS it with you?!? Dammit, I DON'T WANT TO DEAL WITH YOU!! I HATE YOU!! Well, guess what, Hoff. It's not going to be so easy...not this time. Because, the next time you're not looking, I am going to hit you even harder. And this time, I PROMISE, you WILL NOT GET UP. The crowd is FURIOUS...and Hoff is in a state of shock. STEVENS But I want you to know something, Hoff. What I did...I didn't do it to hurt you. No, Hoff, I did it...I did it to ruin your life. You were the OAOAST Champion, and you had all the friends in all the right places. And now...now you threw it all away. Congratulations. Hoff shakes his head, holding it in his hands, then looking back at Stevens. STEVENS And before I let you think about what you've just done, I've got one more thing to say. As long as I am here...as long as there is air for me to breathe...as long as I live. You, my friend, will NEVER....EVER...hold the world title again. Live with that. The hD~! logo flashes across the screen as we cut to a shot of the OAOAST Chairman of the Board, Bill Watts, standing in the middle of the ring with a microphone. WATTS At this time, I would like to ask Chris Stevens to come down to the ring. "BOOOOOOOOOOOO" Chris Stevens' music kicks in..... (GRAPHIC: "Bound for the Floor" by Local H, available on OAOAST: The Music, coming this March) ...and the man himself steps onto the stage, smirking snidely. The fans lay the jeers on thick as Stevens looks to the left, then to the right, chuckling. COLE This man may be the newest most-hated man in wrestling. COACH Word, yo. CABOOSE Now, guys, I know, I love Hoff as much as anyone, but Chris Stevens didn't do anything I wouldn't do. COLE WHAT? COACH Caboose, that's horrible! COLE He almost ended a man's career! CABOOSE Listen. All I'm saying is that sometimes, you need to take control of the situation. You gotta do what you got to do. COLE That is sick, Caboose. CABOOSE Judge not, lest ye be judged. COACH I like Judge Judy... CABOOSE Amazing. COLE And outdated! Judy hasn't been on the air for like a year! CABOOSE (raising an eyebrow) You a big fan, Cole? COLE I...um...uh.... CABOOSE Wanker. Stevens climbs up the ring steps and enters the squared circle, putting his hands on his hips and shooting a smarmy gaze at Watts. The fans let him have it. COLE These people HATE this man! CABOOSE They just don't get it. Stevens checks over his shoulder, seemingly looking for something. WATTS Now, Chris, just so you know, Hoff is not here tonight. "BOOOOOOOOO" WATTS I sent him home, for both your safety and the safety of everyone else here. So, please, relax. Stevens shrugs. COLE You've got to believe Stevens is afraid of repercussion for his actions! CABOOSE Don't force your beliefs on me, Cole. COLE Why do I even bother. WATTS Now, Chris. In the time you've been with us here in the OAOAST, you've grown from a no-named loser to one of our biggest and brightest stars. Stevens smiles thinly, nodding. WATTS Now son, why would you go and throw that all away? Stevens raises his own mic to his lips. STEVENS Billy Boy, I have no intention of throwing that away. Watts' eyebrows raise at Stevens' cool response. WATTS Chris, I don't think you relaize what you've done! Never mind the legal ramifications, son. Think back to this September, when I told you, in front of everybody, that if you and Hoff touched each other again, you'd be fired on the spot! The fans cheer Watts' reminder! COACH Hey, I remember that! CABOOSE Do you? Do you REALLY? Coach thinks for a second.... COACH Um....yes? CABOOSE Be quiet. COACH Kay. WATTS Now, Chris, it seems like I have no choice here! You've got me in a tight spot-- STEVENS That's right, Watts, you DON'T have any choice. A murmur passes through the crowd as Stevens cuts Watts off. COLE Wait, what does he mean? STEVENS Now, before you get this crowd of morons all hot and bothered over me being fired, allow me to introduce to you my partner-in-crime...my image consultant, Ricardo "Jumbo" Montana! COLE What?!? The fans jeer as through the curtain steps Jumbo...looking much different! The Armani looks are replaced by a T-shirt, biker vest, and black jeans! Watts frowns as Jumbo makes his way to the ring, and climbs in, getting clasped on the back by Stevens. WATTS ...Let me guess...he isn't your image consultant. STEVENS What, you mean this? (gesturing to his stylin' suit) No, this I did all on my own, with a little help from GQ. No, no, Jumbo here isn't any fahsion expert. But what he is is the best muscle money can buy. And he's my alibi. He knows I wasn't the one who laid Hoff out...because I made HIM do it. The crowd *gasps*! STEVENS Oh, yeah, Watts, that's right! Read it and weep! I didn't touch pretty boy Hoff, so you can take your little stipulation and shove it up your ass. Watts looks ahead for a moment, concentrating, then shakes his head. WATTS Well, Chris, that's all well and good. But there's still the legal matters to tend to-- STEVENS Listen, bub. You and I both know that's not how it's gonna go down. You need me too much right now. Remember, you were the one who asked ME to be in the Elimination Chamber. You wouldn't DARE send me off to prison. And Hoff? Pfft. That big lummox probbaly doesn't even know HOW to press charges. Not to mention the fact that he just *loves* to settle things with his fists. So drop the act, Watts. I'm not buying it. The crowd boos as Stevens grins at Watts. Bill nods. WATTS Well, you're right, Chris. We won't be pressing any charges. And you're right about Hoff, as well. In fact, he wants to get a piece of you so bad that he asked me for a match with you at Anglepalooza, on January 30th. A request that I've accepted. What do you think of that, Chris? The fans cheer, but Stevens sneers and shrugs it off. STEVENS So? What do I care? I've beaten Hoff so many times now that I've lost count. And we all know, he KNOWS he can't beat me, and he's afraid of me. "BOOOOOOOOO!" CABOOSE He's right! COACH No way, 'Booze! The crowd jeers Stevens once more, as he laughs to himself. Watts strokes his chin before proceeding. WATTS Well, if that's true, then why would he ask for a STEEL CAGE MATCH?! "YEEEEEEEEAAAAAHHH~!" Stevens' jaw DROPS. WATTS Oh, that's right, Chris. At Anglepalooza it's you and Hoff, one-on-one, in a steel cage. Best of luck, pal, because you're gonna need it!! COLE WHAT?!? Stevens' jaw sinks even LOWER-- and a man in the front row flings off his hat and trenchcoat!! COACH It's HOFF!! Whoa!! Before anyone can react, Hoff leaps the guardrail and dives into the ring!! The fans scream in delight as Stevens turns around just in time to be SPEARED to the mat! Hoff starts laying in some HUGE fists, before getting pulled off by Jumbo!! Hoff turns around, and SPINEBUSTER TO JUMBO~!! COLE OUT OF NOWHERE!! CABOOSE Now DAMMIT, he's not supposed to be here!! Hoff turns away from Jumbo and dives at a retreating Stevens again, tackling him back down!! Watts frantically waves security from the back as Hoff PUMMELS Stevens!! COLE This is insane!! CABOOSE GET HIM OUT OF THERE!! Security finally hits the ring. Three guards grab Hoff's arms and back, dragging him kicking off of Stevens, who's sporting a bloodied nose-- but HOFF GETS FREE!! Hoff DIVES at a wide-eyed Stevens, thrashing at him again before finally being restrained!! Hoff's eyes FLARE as he glares a hole through a very panicked Chris Stevens! Security manages to drag Hoff out, leaving Stevens and Jumbo to recompose in the ring. COLE What a confrontation! And what an announcement! Hoff and Chris Stevens at Anglepalooza, in a STEEL CAGE MATCH! This is gonna be intense!! COACH Oh, for sure, Mikey, that one's gonna be amazing! CABOOSE I don't think I like Hoff anymore. COLE You ARE a heel..... ..... COLE Main event coming up!! Drek Stone vs....versus PHOENIX?! NEXT!!! *cut to commercial* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hoff 0 Report post Posted January 14, 2005 Woke Up This Morning Got Yourself A Gun Mama Always Said You’d Be The Chosen One COLE And here we go. It’s now time for our Main Event! COACH What the hell? It’s already 11:02! This thing isn’t going to get more than a few minutes now! CABOOSE Oh, whoever organized this show tonight sucks! COLE Don’t say that! I know the man. He’s a nice guy. He’s just been real busy with work the past few months. CABOOSE Yeah, well, if he would just put the vodka bottle down once in a while, we wouldn’t have this problem. COLE Okay. Well, those are enough inside comments this week. We have a huge matchup to get to. Once the smooth sounds of “Woke Up This Morning” begin to play over the loudspeakers, the fans immediately stand up to unleash a wild series of boos towards the Heavyweight Champion. Sure enough, Drek Stone steps out through the curtains with the gold securely fastened around his waist. As he walks down the ramp, the crowd tries screaming obscenities to get him to respond as he did earlier, but he merely shoos them away with a flick of his wrist. CABOOSE See that? So suave, he is. I’ll bet Pheonix would probably break his arm trying to execute a Greco-Roman wrist shoo like that. As Drek steps into the ring, he unclasps the title from around his waist, plants a kiss upon the gold medallion, and hands it off to a nearby referee. A booming chant, one that Drek Stone is pretty much all too familiar with, starts to echo throughout the building. “DREK STONE SUCKS!” “DREK STONE SUCKS!” “DREK STONE SUCKS!” COACH These crowds need to come up with a new chant. Coach r00lz, Drek dr00lz. Something like that. How many times can a man be told he sucks? CABOOSE When he SOOOOO clearly doesn’t. Drek, doing his best to ignore the fans hurling insults at him, starts bouncing along the ring ropes, anxious to get this contest started. Finally, the soulful sounds of inspirational jobber music begin to play over the speakers. The fans let out a surprisingly loud cheer as they await Pheonix’s arrival. COLE Folks, I don’t think you need to be reminded of what’s at stake tonight. If Drek Stone can beat Pheonix here, that’s it, he will officially be given the night off at AnglePalooza. If he loses, he’s going to put his Heavyweight Title up on the line against that man in a little less than three weeks at Palooza. CABOOSE Me and my main man Drek are going to be kicking it back that night. I can tell. COACH Wait, guys…..where exactly IS Pheonix? Pheonix’s music continues to reverberate throughout the building, but the man is simply nowhere to be found. Drek, with a wide smirk on his face, moves over to the ring ropes to get a better view of the entranceway. CABOOSE I knew it! I knew Pheonix wouldn’t show up tonight! COACH Well, now it’s 11:04. Folks, show’s over. It’s about time we head……WAIT! COLE IS THAT PHEONIX?! From the ringside crowd, someone jumps over the barricade and slides into the ring. IT’S PHEONIX! The crowd lets out a roar as Pheonix simply stands behind Drek Stone, who is still waiting for his opponent to come out through the entranceway. The referee calls for the bell…. *DING! DING! DING!* …..and as Drek begins to turn around to look behind him, Pheonix rolls him up with a schoolboy pin! ONE!!! TWO!!! KICKOUT!! The fans let out a disappointed groan as Drek manages to just get out of the pinning predicament. He immediately rolls back onto his feet and, glaring at Pheonix, charges at him without hesitation. Pheonix quickly jumps behind Drek, rolls him up, and brings him back down to the mat with a crucifix pin. Once again, the referee goes down for the count! ONE!!! TWO!!! KICKOUT!!! Both men immediately pop back up to their feet once again. Drek charges forward at Pheonix once again – and this time brings him down to the mat with a HUGE lariat! COACH OUCH! CABOOSE Oh, here we go! Nice! Not giving his enhancement talent opponent a moment to rest, Drek quickly begins stomping him on the back of his head. Pheonix tries to prop himself up on all fours to move around, but Drek steps back – and unleashes a vicious kick across the ribs of Pheonix! CABOOSE Looks like Pheonix is learning the first rule in the OAOAST Handbook. Learning it and learning it well. Rule #1. Do. Not. Piss. Off. Drek. Stone. As Pheonix clutches at his ribs, grimacing over the shooting pains in his chest, Drek picks him up off the mat by the back of his head and pushes him into a nearby turnbuckle. With a noticeable smirk, the Heavyweight Champion stares at his dazed opponent, then out at this Seattle crowd that, surprisingly enough, doesn’t seem to care for him. With a nod, he steps back slowly…. AND SLAPS PHEONIX ACROSS THE FACE!! *SMACK* “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!” Almost instinctively, Pheonix grabs at his face, which allows Drek the chance to hit him in the midsection with a damaging blow. He then grabs Pheonix’s right arm and gives him a SPITEFUL irish-whip into the opposite turnbuckle. Pheonix hits the turnbuckle chest-first and falls to the mat, with the impact of the move sending him rolling backwards and onto his chest. The fans begin loudly booing as Drek slaps his chest arrogantly and raises his arms up for this devoted crowd. CABOOSE Come on, Drek. Finish this baby off. COLE Pheonix is looking in terrible shape here. CABOOSE Of course he is! How dare he mess with Drek’s New Years Presentation two weeks ago! Cole, I’m still boiling over it! Imagine how our champion feels! Pheonix should consider himself lucky he hasn’t been dumped at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean yet. With Pheonix wriggling around on the mat, Drek begins to symbolically slash his thumb against his neck. However, once he’s in the middle of the gesture, he sees Pheonix moving back up to his knees out of the corner of his eyes. The Heavyweight Champion stops what he’s doing, moves towards Pheonix, and gives him a hard right hand across the face. Once this troubled jobber falls back down to the mat, Drek lifts his thumb back up to his neck and finishes the gesture. CABOOSE You see that? Pheonix won’t decide when Drek decides it’s over. Only Drek Stone – our cherished Heavyweight Champion of the world – decides when this match will end! With the jeering from this Seattle crowd seemingly driving him, Drek begins to pry Pheonix off the ground simply by pulling at his mask. Once he’s up to his feet, Drek sets him into a front-facelock stance. A roar immediately breaks out as Drek silently holds his challenger in StoneCutter position. After absorbing the continued booing for a few moments, Drek finally goes to lift Pheonix up – but finds his opponent’s feet firmly planted on the mat. Pheonix suddenly yanks Drek’s right arm off his head and slips behind the Heavyweight Champion. With the two men now standing back-to-back, Pheonix links his arms together with Drek and brings him down to the mat with a backslide pin. The crowd lets out a surprised cheer as the referee drops down for the count! ONE!!! TWO!!!! THREE!!!!! *DING! DING! DING!* COACH WHAT?!?! CABOOSE NO!!!!!!! The fans let out a HUGE cheer as Pheonix moves up to his feet slowly, holding onto the back of his head. With the impact of this win gradually starting to hit Pheonix, he suddenly dashes towards a nearby turnbuckle, jumps onto the middle rope, and raises his arms triumphantly for the crowd. Meanwhile, Drek simply sits on the mat, absolutely stunned over what has just happened. COLE I do NOT believe what I’m seeing! CABOOSE THAT WAS A FAST COUNT! HIS SHOULDERS WERE UP AT TWO! PHEONIX IS AN ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT! THIS WIN DOES NOT COUNT! COACH Face the facts! We now have a Main Event set up for AnglePalooza! And this could be a record setting defeat for Drek Stone, if I’m not mistaken. This match was only a few minutes old! Once Pheonix jumps off that turnbuckle, he crosses the ring, moving towards another corner post. As he hops onto that middle rope and raises his arms for the audience once more, Drek pushes himself up onto his feet. Staring at Pheonix with a complete look of disgust, he watches as this lowly jobber celebrates with the crowd. Once Pheonix steps off the turnbuckle, he begins walking back to the center of the ring – and comes face-to-face with Drek Stone. COACH Guys, even I have to admit, this is a bit of an underwhelming Heavyweight Title match for AnglePalooza, you know? CABOOSE Underwhelming isn’t even the word! That man could be one win away from being the leader of this company! Do you realize what that could mean? COLE Amazing! We could have Pheonix in the Main Event of AngleMania! CABOOSE Oh. My. Good. God. No. Pheonix and Drek Stone begin staring each other down in the middle of the ring, with the Heavyweight Champion still noticeably shocked over what has just taken place. The two men look at each other intensely for a few moments, until Pheonix tries stepping past Drek to move towards another turnbuckle. Suddenly, Stone gives him ANOTHER nasty slap across the face. *SMACK* “OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH!” COLE Oh, come on! That’s uncalled for! CABOOSE Oh no. At this point, I think it’s VERY called for! As Pheonix steps back and holds one hand against his cheek, Drek moves his face closer to his new opponent and starts angrily screaming in the #1 Contender’s ear. DREK YOU DON’T DESERVE THIS! YOU DID NOTHING TONIGHT! NOTHING!! I TOOK YOU APART HERE, AND YOU HAD TO CHEAT TO WIN! YOU’RE A DEAD MAN, PHEONIX! YOU’RE A DEAD – WHOA!! Suddenly, Drek gets a HARD shove back towards the ropes, courtesy of Pheonix. Raising his eyes in disbelief, he stomps back over to Pheonix – but is suddenly brought down with a HUGE spear! The fans in the arena start going crazy as Pheonix straddles himself on Drek’s chest and begins hitting him with VICIOUS lefts and rights to the face! COACH WOW! WHAT IS THIS WE’RE SEEING FROM PHEONIX?! CABOOSE WHAT THE HELL?! SOMEBODY STOP THIS! PLEASE! Pheonix quickly gets off Drek’s chest, allowing the Heavyweight Champion a chance to scurry back to his feet. Once he does, Pheonix pushes him into the corner and unleashes ANOTHER wild series of punches and stomps to Drek Stone! Drek tries covering himself against the blows, but it’s simply unsuccessful! The #1 Contender finally pulls Drek out of the corner and into the center of the ring. With a good grip on the Champion, Pheonix dashes forward – AND DUMPS DREK STONE OVER THE TOP ROPE AND ONTO THE ARENA FLOOR! COLE Look at this! Can you BELIEVE what we’re seeing?! CABOOSE I CAN’T! Pheonix ruins Drek’s presentation two weeks ago – and NOW he gets a Pay-Per-View Heavyweight Title shot?! This is the worst thing that could have ever happened! The fans let out another huge cheer as Drek hits the ground and immediately begins scurrying up the ramp to get out of harm’s way. Halfway along, he falls on his ass and turns his attention back to the ring. It’s at this point that Pheonix makes the championship gesture around his waist. He then slowly puts a hand on top of his mask. Grabs a handful of fabric. And lifts the mask off his head! To reveal….. COLE NO WAY!! CABOOSE IT CAN’T BE!!! COACH IT IS!!! TRIPLE C AJ FLAIRE!!! The fans in Seattle go ABSOLUTELY CRAZY as Drek’s eyes immediately bug out of his head! AJ stares out at Drek for a moment as the cheers in the building continue to erupt. Finally, throwing the mask down onto the mat, AJ Flaire moves to a nearby turnbuckle, steps onto the middle rope, and makes the championship belt gesture around his waist once again. As if it was somehow possible, the reaction in the building gets even louder! COLE I can’t believe it! AJ FLAIRE HAS RETURNED TO THE OAOAST! COACH IN THIS MATCH, AJ FLAIRE WAS PHEONIX ALL ALONG! CABOOSE I thought he was retired! I THOUGHT HE WAS GONE! Not even bothering to move up the ramp at this point, Drek just continues to stare up into the ring, simply staring at AJ Flaire with wide eyes. AJ raises his arms up to the crowd once more as they bask him with their cheers. “AJ FLAIRE!” “AJ FLAIRE!” “AJ FLAIRE!” COACH Guys, you know what this means, don’t you? CABOOSE Oh god…..I didn’t even think of that. COACH Scratch that Drek Stone vs. Pheonix AnglePalooza match we had for you, folks. CABOOSE No! COLE The Main Event has just been switched! ANGLEPALOOZA! DREK STONE! AJ FLAIRE! OAOAST HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP NOW ON THE LINE! COACH WHAT A MAIN EVENT! CABOOSE …..I can not believe this night has turned out like this. COACH I don’t think any of us can! COLE Folks, for Caboose and the Coach, I’m Michael Cole saying – see you next week! AJ FLAIRE IS BACK IN THE OAOAST! Before the show fades away, the camera quickly shows two shots. One of AJ Flaire standing on the middle turnbuckle with his arms outstretched. In the background, the massive excitement of the crowd is still clearly visible, as is AJ’s huge smile. However, in our second shot, we suddenly spot a shaken Drek Stone blankely staring into the ring at his AnglePalooza opponent. The camera view starts to slowly weaken as Drek continues to gaze at his opponent, still trying to comprehend exactly what has happened to him tonight – and what exactly it could mean for the future of his title reign. *FADE TO BLACK* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hoff 0 Report post Posted January 14, 2005 © 2005, OAOAST Inc./HeldDOWN~! Entertainment CREDITS: (in no particular order) Phenom Failed Mascot Nice Guy Adam NY Untouchable Patty O'Green Tony149 Mystery Eskimo The Mad Cappa Hoff (OMG ME~!) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
