Guest Report post Posted May 26, 2002 This topic has probably been posted before, but I didn't see it, so there fore it does not exist. Feh. What was the greatest line in Simpson's history? Granted, narrowing it down to one may be slightly impossible, but hey lets hurt ourselves trying to do it anyways. Mine actually comes from an episode that I think sucks. The Mr. X episode. Homer finally escapes the island and comes home to find his double. A fight ensues and Homer drops some knowledge on our asses... If he's anything like me he doesn't like being KICKED IN THE GROIN! Awww. Granted, they've had more intelligent lines in the years, and funneir ones frankly, but that one always gets me. Ah, my first topic created and it revolves around a man being kicked in the junk. I'm so proud of myself right now. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MarvinisaLunatic Report post Posted May 26, 2002 I think this was settled a long time ago. Comic Book Guy: Worst. Episode. Ever. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 26, 2002 I have so many favorites, but the one that comes to mind right now is during the episode where Homer's half-brother Herb (Danny Devito) comes back for his second episode to punch Homer out and then make a baby-translator. It's near the end and Herb is giving everyone presents for giving him the opportuinty to get rich again. He takes Homer outside to give him his present, and Homer goes... "What do I get?! It's not another punch in the face is it? Because if it is, I don't want it!" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Shaved Bear Report post Posted May 26, 2002 "I'm not a praying man, but if you're up there...save me Superman" classic. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 26, 2002 The episode when Bart becomes famous with his "I didn't do it" sketch with Krusty. At the end of the episode all the secondary characters show up and say their catchphrases, and when everyone ecpects Lisa to say something, she goes "I'm going to bed" Homer- What kind of catchphrase is that? Personally my favorite Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest J*ingus Report post Posted May 26, 2002 In one episode, Lisa complains that an Itchy & Scratchy show is getting their facts wrong on some laws of physics. Homer, sitting on the couch, says "Oh Lisa, cartoon's aren't supposed to be realistic!" Immedietly afterward, another Homer walks by the window outside. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest crandamaniac Report post Posted May 26, 2002 "me fail english, that's unpossible!" Ralph Wiggum Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest DragonflyKid Report post Posted May 26, 2002 From the millenium episode: Lisa- Look at the wonders of the computer age now. Homer- Wonders Lisa, or blunders? Lisa- I think that was implied by what I said. Homer- Implied Lisa, or implode? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 26, 2002 Marge: "Homer, there's more to New York than pimps and C.H.U.D.s". Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Lil Naitch Report post Posted May 27, 2002 I forget which episode, it's with the Simpsons or a trip. Bart- Are we there yet? Homer-No. Bart- Are we there yet? Homer-No. Bart- Are we there yet? Homer-No. Bart- Are we there yet? Homer-D'oh! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest JHawk Report post Posted May 27, 2002 Don't ask me why, but this is the Simpsons line I seem to use more than any other. From one of the Treehouse of Horror episodes (IV? Can't remember): Homer: "Mmm, forbidden donut." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 27, 2002 In the lemon tree episode, at the impound lot: impounder: what are you, stupid? Homer: Stupid like a fox! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Crazy Dan Report post Posted May 27, 2002 I like it in the episode where Lisa cheats when Ralph is at the computer and says "Hi Super Nintendo Chalmers, I'm learning" I also like: Homer: "MMMM, 64 slices of American cheese" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 27, 2002 "Football to the groin! Football to the grion! Ahahahahahahaaa!!!!" -Homer as a judge at a film festival. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest jimmy no nose Report post Posted May 27, 2002 Bart: Do you wear boxers or briefs? Homer: No. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 27, 2002 A few more... (From the episode where Lisa tricks Homer & Bart into thinking they're lepers. Homer & Bart are watching TV really loud late at night and Lisa can't sleep.) Lisa: [yells downstairs] Will you guys turn that thing down? Homer: Sweetie, if we didn't turn it down for the cops, what chance do you have? ------------ (The one where Homer becomes an inventor. I almost pissed myself when I heard the last line of this conversation...) Homer: Now, this next one's for the ladies. How many times have you gals been late for a high-powered business meeting, only to realize you're not wearing make-up? Marge: That's every woman's nightmare. Homer: That's why I invented this revolutionary make-up gun. It's for the woman who only has four-fifths of a second to get ready. Close your eyes, Marge. [Homer fires the make-up gun] Homer: Now you're ready for a night on the town. Marge: Homer! You've got it set on "whore". Homer: Okay, this time try to keep your nostrils closed. [Homer points the gun at her, but she pushes it away from her face. A vaguely face-shaped blotch of make-up stains the wall] Homer: Oh, look what you did. Now I have to go get my cold-cream gun. Lisa: Dad, women won't like being shot in the face. Homer: Women will like what I tell them to like! Wa-hoo for www.snpp.com! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 27, 2002 Another, since i'm in a Simpson'ing mood.... Homer : "AHH! HOO! HOO! Look, that kids got bosoms! Who's got a wet towel? Heh Heh!" [Whip crack of towel] Homer : "Come're Butterball!" [uter wails in torment] Uter : "Don't make me run, I'm full of chocolate!" Full of chocolate indeed. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest DokDoyle Report post Posted May 27, 2002 From "Homer= Circus Freak": "Billy Corgin, Smashing Pumpkins" "Homer Simpson, smiling politely" when he listed off every job he's ever had, in one this season was good for a laugh too Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest crandamaniac Report post Posted May 27, 2002 from the Smashing Pumpkins episode: band memeber: is it true we gotta bring our own water to springfield? Homer: We got a saying where i come from-If it's black send it back, if it's brown drink it down. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest godthedog Report post Posted May 27, 2002 anything ralph wiggum says is priceless. my favorite thing he said was: "principal skinner and mrs krabappel were making babies in the closet, and i saw one of the babies and it looked at me." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest crandamaniac Report post Posted May 28, 2002 Ralph Wiggum: "Teacher made me go to Principal Skinner because i was dirty" Wiggum: "When i grow up, i wanna be a principal or a butterfly! I love you principal skinner" ================================= Wiggum: This is where i found the leprechaun <points to rock> Bart: Leprechaun, right? Wiggum: He tells me to burn things <later on in episode> Leprechaun: You done good laddy, now you know what to do...Burn the whole lot of 'em! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Mole Report post Posted May 28, 2002 Homer: "They have internet on computers now?" At IMDB.com, they have TONS of quotes from the show. Its worth a look. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest ant_7000 Report post Posted May 28, 2002 Homer: I like my homosexuals flaming Like the one that came on tonight Homer tells Marge: Lenny and Carl suck,(pauses tells Marge) please don't tell Lenny and Carl that they suck because they're the only friends I have. Ralph and Chief Wiggum eating tomacco Ralph: This taste like grandma Wiggum: This does taste like grandma can we have some more? Homer: hmmmmmm hug Marge: If loving your kids is lame, then im the biggest lame Homer yells at Bart for stealing at try and save Homer: I didn't take you to see those Police Academy movies for fun eventhough the guy who makes noises was pretty funny, now where was I oh yeah stay out of my stuff (I don't remember if he said the last part) Ralph: you choo choo choose me Mrs. Karappel she show sex ed tape and when the rabbits are fucking. Karappel: she's faking it Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest J*ingus Report post Posted May 28, 2002 Homer: I didn't take you to see those Police Academy movies for fun eventhough the guy who makes noises was pretty funny, now where was I oh yeah stay out of my stuff (I don't remember if he said the last part) I think the actual line went something like this: "STEALING?! What have I taught you? Why do you think I took you to see all those Police Academy movies, for fun? Well I didn't hear anybody laughing, DID YOU?!?" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Sandman9000 Report post Posted May 28, 2002 When Lisa took tap dancing lessons. Ralph: Miss teacher lady, my shoes make noises when I move them. Teacher: You must be Ralph. Ralph: My Daddy shoots people! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest redbaron51 Report post Posted May 29, 2002 The Kingpins (Mr. Burns bowling) Bart: These uniforms suck! Marge: Bart stop saying such language, I wonder where you get it? Homer: Ya Moe, that team sucked. I mean I've heard teams suck so bad, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked. Marge: HOMER! Homer: Gotta go Moe, my damn weiner kids are listening. Bart: Hey! Lisa: We are not weiners. Homer: Then why are you dressed like that? Bart: They made us. Homer: Ooo they made us. Well thats too bad. Homer's internet business. Homer: So the internet is on computers now... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest crandamaniac Report post Posted May 29, 2002 the soulmate episode: Homer: I hope I didn't brain my damage. ================= Pleasant Voice: Thank you for calling the Parking Violations Bureau. To plead "Not Guilty" press one now. <Homer presses one> Pleasant Voice: Thank you, your plea has been... Gruff Voice: Rejected Pleasant Voice: You will be assessed the full fine, plus a small Gruff Voice: Large Lateness Penalty Pleasant Voice: Please wait by your vehicle between 9 a.m and 5 p.m for parking officer Steve Gruff Voice:Grabowski Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Dr. Wrestlingphysics Report post Posted May 29, 2002 Chief Wiggum: Do you know anything agout a truckload of cigarettes that was stolen? Fat Tony: What's a truck? Wiggum: Don't play dumb with me! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest evenflowDDT Report post Posted May 29, 2002 I'm paraphrasing heavily, but this is from the episode where Milhouse and Bart get the $20 and have a "night out on the town" and get the all-sugar squishee. [Homer is looking for a peanut under the couch] Homer: Aww... $20? But I wanted a peanut! Homer's Brain: $20 can buy lots of peanuts. Homer: Explain how! Homer's Brain: In our society, money can be exchanged for goods and services. Homer: Whoo hoo! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest JHawk Report post Posted May 29, 2002 I can't remember the individual episodes, but here are a few. Smithers: "I think women and seamen don't mix." Homer: "No, Bart. Beer is only for daddies and kids with fake IDs." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
