HD: PR's stuff

[Tony149 0]

No idea why he sent it to me, but here it is. He requested it be put somewhere in the middle of the show.

 

A piano plays a melody, causing the crowd to cheer. The lights go down in the arena, turning back on in tune with the melody. 

*COME ON!*

“What’s My Name?” by DMX starts playing. Seizure inducing lights appear around the entrance. The crowd cheers as the Colombian Heat entrance video plays on the AngleTron. The entrance doors slide open, and Colombian Heat steps out onto the entrance stage. The crowd’s cheers get louder. Heat raises his hands, acknowledging the fans, and then walks down the entrance ramp, hyping the crowd up along the way. 

COLE
Last week we saw the return of Colombian Heat, PRL’s FORMER best friend, who had been gone from the OAOAST for over a year. 

COACH
And what a way to return. Colombian Heat took on the entire Lightning Crew after he turned down PRL’s idea of a reunion between them. He has made it clear that he’s coming after Tha Puerto Rican, and hopes to become 24/7 Champion in the process. 

Colombian Heat enters the ring. He raises his arms in the air again, and then throws up the “WEST SIIIIIIIIIDE” hand signal. He gets on the ring ropes and throws up the “W”, and then poses on the second turnbuckle. 

CABOOSE
Colombian Heat is an ungrateful bastard. PRL gave him an olive branch last week. He WANTED to become Heat’s friend again. And what does Heat do? He shoves him and ATTACKS him! 

COLE
Colombian Heat knew very well that PRL was lying. He saw right through him. 

CABOOSE
PRL’s changed. He’s not the same man he used to be, especially after he joined up with Popick. This is not the same PRL that kicked Colombian Heat out of The Lightning Crew a year ago. 

COLE
Oh yeah right. PRL hasn’t changed at all. His handshake with Popick at November Reign proved that! 

Heat gets off the turnbuckle and grabs a microphone. The lights go back in the arena as Heat bobs his head to his entrance song. “What’s My Name?” by DMX dies down. The crowd is still cheering, producing a smile on Colombian Heat’s face. 

COLOMBIAN HEAT
Aw yeah! Yo, yo, yo! If all of y’all are ready to feel the Heat, make some noise UP IN THIS BI-AAAAATCH~!!!

The crowd cheers. 

COACH
Aw yeah! Fo’ sho! I’m ready to feel the Heat, yo! Word to your mother! 

CABOOSE
Stop it. 

COACH
Okay. 

HEAT
A'ight. So, last week, I returned to the OAOAST, and when I returned, Tha Puerto Rican tried to be nice to me again. He tried to treat me like I was his long lost brother. What PR forgets is that PRL stopped being my “brother from another mother” when he KICKED ME OUT of The Lightning Crew back in the ’04. Ever since then, I haven’t considered PRL a brother, a friend, an acquaintance. None of that. No. PRL. That dude is my ENEMY! And what do you do with your enemies? Dat’s right. You kick their ass from pillar to post! 

Heat takes a moment to let the fans cheer. 

HEAT
So since PRL is my enemy, and since you are suppose to kick your enemies ass, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that I want to kick Tha Puerto Rican’s ass six ways from Sunday! 

CABOOSE
Oh Heat. Like you’re a genius? Give me a break! 

HEAT
And since Tha Puerto Rican happens to be the OAOAST 24/7 Champion, I wouldn’t mind taking that belt away from him! I think I’d look good rocking the 24/7 Title around my waist. Don’t you agree? 

The crowd cheers in agreement. 

HEAT
Ha Ha! Yeah boy. I’d be the illest 24/7 Champion ever! And don’t fret, yo. Don’t panic. I’d proudly wear the REAL 24/7 Title around my waist! Not that hunk of junk PR calls a title. Plus, I figure wearing that belt would cause all the girlies to come flocking to me! Heh heh. Ya heard me? I’m a P.I.M.P.! You know what I’m saying? 

CABOOSE
No, I don’t know what you’re saying. Speak proper English! 

HEAT (CONT’D)
So, Lightning Kid, Puerto Rican Lightning, Tha Puerto Rican. Whatever you wanna call yourself. I’s know your back there. And I knows these people wanna see you feel the Heat! So, come on there, and get ready to receive the ass kicking of a lifetime! Get out here now! 

COLE
Whoa! Colombian Heat has thrown down the gauntlet! He wants to face Tha Puerto Rican, right here, right now! 

COACH
Tonight? Oh boy. I hope Heat is ready for this! 

Colombian Heat paces back and forth in the ring. 

“LIGHTNING CREW!”

A lightning bolt hits the entrance. The Lightning Crew entrance video plays on the AngleTron, while “No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Royds starts playing. The crowd starts booing loudly. The entrance doors slide open, and through the smoke come The Lightning Crew. The crowds boos get louder. 

COLE
And there they are. The Lightning Crew has come out to back Tha Puerto Rican. 

COACH
How is he going to respond to Heat’s challenge? 

“The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican is wearing a gold chain, an earring on his left ear, a black vest with no shirt, a $500 Rolex watch, black dress pants, and black dress shoes. He is also holding his custom made spinner 24/7 Championship belt like a purse. He spins the belt plate and then stares at Heat (despite wearing sunglasses). “No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Royds dies down as PRL begins to speak. 

“THE CORPORATE CHAMPION” THA PUERTO RICAN
Colombian Heat. You come out here, you run your mouth, wearing your stupid clothes, talking like an idiot, and you have the GALL, the AUDACITY to throw down a punk card to Tha Puerto Rican?

Heat nods his head. 

PUERTO RICAN
Well, Tha Puerto Rican says, in the words of Lil’ Kim: SHUT UP, BITCH! 

The crowd boos. “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” starts up. 

PRL 
Now…

PRL is interrupted by the “P.R. SUCKS!” chant. 

PRL
London, England, this is not the way you treat The Corporate Champ, so either show me some respect or Know Your Role and SHUT YOUR MOUTHS! 

The crowd starts jeering even louder! 

COLE
London, England HATES Tha Puerto Rican! 

CABOOSE
I apologized to Tha Puerto Rican for the behavior of my fellow countrymen. 

PRL
Now Colombian Heat, coming back to the OAOAST after I beat your ass was your first mistake. Coming out here and issuing a challenge was mistake #2. The fact that you really think you can go one-on-one with The Corporate Champ proves just how much of an idiot you really are! 

The Lightning Crew all agree and pose menacily. Well except for Thomas Rodriguez, who is hiding behind Mr. Boricua. 

PRL
Colombian Heat, there are two things you can do when I kick your ass: nothing or like it! I tried to stop the violence and increase the peace last week. I gave you a chance to simply walk away. You didn’t have to become my friend again. I wasn’t asking that. I was asking for you to simply let things slide. To move on. To not make it your life’s mission to hurt me. I was trying to prevent you from taking a Lightning Crew ass kicking. But no. You didn’t want to let things slide. You didn’t want to move on, you bitter jackass! You wanted to act like a jabrony and come after me, attacking me, Tha Puerto Rican! Well, Heat, you made your decision, and now, you’re gonna suffer because of it! So Heat, you want to fight Tha Puerto Rican tonight on The Corporate Show, HeldDOWN~!? Well, I’ll tell you what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna walk down the Corporate Ramp. 

PRL and The Lightning Crew start walking down the entrance ramp. 

COLE
Uh-oh. 

PRL
I’m gonna slide into The Corporate Ring. I’m gonna take off my $500 Rolex watch. (PRL removes his watch.) Remove my $800 Versaci vest. (PRL remove his vest.) And then, I’m gonna proceed to lay the smackdown on your candy ass so hard, you’re going to regret ever stepping foot in an OAOAST ring! 

The Lightning Crew is about to enter the ring. 

COLOMBIAN HEAT
That’s all well and good P.R. You go ahead and do that. But before you do, I thought I’d let you know that I got me some backup too! 

Colombian Heat does The Lightning Crew Salute! Suddenly, through the crowd come Spanish Fly and John “Rock Hard” Brickston! The two former Lightning Crew members slide into the ring, and join up with their fellow former Lightning Crew member. 

COLE
John Brickston and Spanish Fly have joined up with Colombian Heat! 

The crowd cheers loudly. Colombian Heat glances at Fly and Brickston. All three men have smirks on their faces. Colombian Heat, Spanish Fly, and John “Rock Hard” Brickston all do The Lightning Crew Salute at the same time! This enrages Tha Puerto Rican, and he and The Lightning Crew storm the ring and a brawl erupts! 

COLE
The Lightning Crew are fighting each other! 

COACH
We’ve got ourselves a pier six brawl up in here! 

The crowd goes wild! Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall battle Spanish Fly. Vitamin X brawls with John “Rock Hard” Brickston. Tha Puerto Rican brawls with Colombian Heat. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez and Thomas Rodriguez try to move out of the way of the brawling. 

COLE
There’s chaos in the ring! 7 men are brawling inside that ring! 

CABOOSE
I can’t tell what’s going on! 

COACH
Me either! 

Colombian Heat gets the better of PRL. He kicks PRL in the stomach, and turns him around. Heat grabs PRL, and lifts him up for the Colombian Necktie! 

COLE
Here it comes! 

But before anything can come, Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua attack Colombian Heat! Heat drops PR and gets manhandled by Wall and Boricua. That is until John Brickston attacks both big men! Finally, security and the OAOAST Road Agents run into the ring, breaking up the brawl. The crowd boos. 

COLE
And now security is putting a kibosh on this brawl! 

The Road Agents and the security guards pull apart The Lightning Crew and Heat, Fly, and Brickston. PRL is held back as he tries to go after Heat. Security, Terry Taylor, and Terry Funk take The Lightning Crew out of the ring. “Macho Man” Randy Savage, Dean Malenko, and some other security guards hold Heat, Spanish Fly, and John Brickston back. 

CABOOSE
Yeah! Hold Colombian Heat back! He’s a thug! He’s a gangsta! Who knows what he can do?

COACH
Did you see that Colombian Heat was about to give PRL the Colombian Necktie? 

CABOOSE
No I didn’t. You must need glasses. I didn’t see that at all! 

COLE
Coach is right. Colombian Heat was about to give PRL the Colombian Necktie. 

CABOOSE
Why that’s a load of—

COLOMBIAN HEAT
Yo, P! Yo, P! Yo, I just thought of somethin’. I’ma gonna save my title shot until a later date. Because these two brothas over herre still gots some unfinished bizness wit you! So, hows bout in two weeks, at Climax, me, Spanish Fly, and John “Rock Hard” Brickston take you, and two other Lightning Crew members on in a Six-Man Tag Team Match? 

PRL
Tha Puerto Rican accepts! And Heat, get ready, because Tha Puerto Rican’s partners will be the two biggest men in the OAOAST: Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua! THE CHAMP HAS SPO-KUN~!!!

“No Chance In Hell” starts up again. Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall crack their knuckles and grunt. Colombian Heat appears to have been taken aback by PRL’s choice of partners. PRL laughs evilly, as does The Lightning Crew. The crowd boos. 

COLE
An electrifying match has just been added to Climax! “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican, Mr. Boricua, and Cuban Wall will take on Colombian Heat, Spanish Fly, and John “Rock Hard” Brickston in a Six-Man Tag Team Match! 

CABOOSE
I look forward to it. With Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall by his side, Tha Puerto Rican will hurt Colombian Heat so bad, he will NEVER challenge for the 24/7 Title! 

COLE
Now Caboose, that isn’t a guarantee. We won’t know the result of that match until Climax, December 18th. 

CABOOSE
Oh I played out the whole match in my mind right now. PRL, Cuban Wall, and Mr. Boricua will crush Heat, Spanish Fly, and John Brickston, breaking every bone in their bodies. The Lightning Crew will take the remains of Heat, Fly, and Brickston and stomp on them until they’re dust. Then they will cover the dust to win, and afterwards, will take brooms and sweep the dust into a garbage can. Time of the match: 3 minutes.

COLE
Uh…yeah. Anyway, The Lightning Crew explodes December 18th at Climax! 

Colombian Heat, Spanish Fly, and John “Rock Hard” Brickston stare angrily at The Lightning Crew. Colombian Heat glares a hole into PRL. “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican spins the belt plate on his spinner 24/7 Championship belt, then jaws with Heat. The Lightning Crew all stare at the former LC members and act all menacingly. “No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Royds continues playing. 

(FADE OUT)

(COMMERCIALS)