Tony149 0 Report post Posted December 14, 2005 (edited) Heavenly Rockers promo, re-aired NRG commerical (gotta keep the NRG name out there, baby), Climax tease. Tony Schiavone stands in the center of the ring with a microphone in his right hand. SCHIAVONE Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome..the HEAVENLY RRRRROCKERSSSSS! "YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" The fans go BONKERS for the greatest rock 'n' wrestling band of all-time, who pose atop the stage as "G's & Soliders" plays in the background. So rabid are the fans that, as the Heavenly Rockers slap the outstretched hands of those lined up behind the guardrails on their way to the ring, Carl Winslow saves Synth from being sucked into the crowd by females admirers tugging on the Synthmeister's leather jacket. Synth takes it all in stride, a big :) on his face. COLE :lol: Well, Synth is single and looking. CABOOSE For a one night party. COACH That's exactly how I was received when I arrived at the airport. The Coach was mobbed by French chicks. CABOOSE Is that a good thing or a bad thing? COACH That's what I've been trying to figure out since I got here. Synth puts a :) on Tony Schiavone's face when he puts his sunglasses on him. The Heavenly Rockers each drape an arm over Tony's shoulders as they face the hard camera. SCHIAVONE Gentlemen, coming up this Sunday night live on pay-per-view is perhaps you're toughest challenge to date, as you square off against the South Central Militia. Last week they promised to send you a message. And boy, did they send you a message. Your thoughts heading into Sunday. LOGAN The only thought running through my head, Tony Schiavone, is CARNAGE! Pain and suffering for the men who jumped us in the cage and had their valet--no, bitch!--injure my girl Holly-Wood. The South Central Militia pride themselves on blood, guts, violence and intimidation. They tried to intimidate me and Synth when they jumped us in the cage last summer. It didn't work! They tried intimidating us again last week, dressing the All-American Boys up like us and giving them Percussion. Yeah, we got their message...and we returned it to sender. We aren't intimidated. We aren't shaking in our boots. As a matter of fact, we even more fired up than before. That's right. You see, we told you we came back with two objectives -- to become the OAOAST World Tag Team Champions and revenge. Revenge for Holly-Wood. A man once said "an eye for an eye will make us all blind." I say, what do you think seeing eye dogs are for, man?! Our match Sunday night is much bigger than any ramifications on the World Tag Team Title picture. It's personal. The Heavenly Rockers revenge tour begins Sunday night in Seattle with the South Central Militia, and ends with the New New Midnight Express. If you got a problem with that? Deal with it! SYNTH Ain't no Boogeyman needed to tell you we're comin' to get ya. Ah hope you two jolly ranchers got good health insurance; I know I plan on going to confessional this week, because I'm gonna be committing all kinds of sins Sunday night along with Lo. LOGAN The hell with Sunday night. Let's do it RIGHT NOW! "YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!" LOGAN Last week we told them we'd be in town to meet 'em face-to-face, man-to-man. Here we are. Where are they? Where they at?! Logan RIPS the micropohone out of Tony's hands and runs to the corner, leaping onto the middle turnbuckle and pointing to the entranceway. LOGAN Whaddya waitin' for? A stay of execution? There aren't any celebrities here to plead for your life. Like sands through an hourglass, so are the days of your lives! You sealed your fate months ago. Come out and get your asses kicked! COACH Logan's snapped. Snapped! LOGAN (CONT'D) Come on, you p-- "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Logan is interrupted by Jim Cornette and Shyanne. The Heavenly Rockers are none to pleased to see Shyanne caricaturing Holly-Wood by twirling her hair with her fingers, chewing gum, and acting as if she is perpeturally bored while dressed up the way Holly was in her famous poster (see specs thread) -- loose white tank top, blue jeans, and bandana wrapped around her forehead. COLE Cornette has a lot of nerve coming out here. I wonder what he's doing with Shyanne, though. Is he using her as his protector? COACH James E. has balls. Big balls to be entering the same ring as Logan in his current state. I wouldn't want to be near that loose cannon. Shyanne's smokin' hot, that's for sure. Much sexier than Holly-Wood. That girl could use a few burgers. Schiavone approaches the two. CORNETTE You can quote all the soap operas you want, and I'm sure you can since you had all that time to watch every daytime soap with your two-timing girlfriend as you both recovered from one of the many beatings you've received in recent months. "OOOOOOOOOOOOOH!" Logan does his best to remain cool, with help from Synth, who holds onto his left arm. CORNETTE (CONT'D) But they say communication is key to a sucessful relationship. So, in that respect, we did you a favor. SCHIAVONE Come on, Cornette. There's no need to go there. CORNETTE I'll go anywhere I want, and I just did. You wanna compare Marcellus and Vincent to a convicted murder? Well, let me tell you something, brother, there won't be any Governator to save you from the beating you're gonna receive courtesy of the South Central Militia Sunday night, just like there isn't going to be anybody to save The Usual Suspects' tag team titles when my Midnight Express defeat them to become the first 3-time World tag team champions in OAOAST history. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" CORNETTE Heh. Sunday night is gonna be a big night for Jim Cornette Enterprises. I'd invite you to the post-show victory celebration but I gotta feeling your gonna be in a bad mood -- and I hear your a couple of nasty drunks. But that's hearsay. Something that isn't hearsay is your fear of the South Central Militia. COLE What?! CORNETTE (CONT'D) You may be able to fool the morons in the crowd...(boo)...but you can't fool me. Heh. Oh, I see it in your eyes. You wanna talk about carnage, let's talk about what the South Central Militia did last week; how they destroyed the All-American Boys, one of the best tag teams competing internationally with great ease. I gotta give you credit, though. It takes a lot of talent to carry on with that charade, much like the Michael Jackson/Lisa Maria Presley marriage back in the day. Especially when you found out Marcellus and Vincent wouldn't be here-- SCHIAVONE What do you mean, they're not here? I know for a fact they were one of the many talent issued plane tickets for Paris. I see Shyanne here. What's going on, Cornette? CORNETTE Not that it's any of your business, Schiavone, but I had the J.C.E. corporate jet fly Marcellus and Vincent to Seattle so they can prepare for their match Sunday night, while these two idiots will have to take a long plane ride back to the States. As for Shyanne...well, the Handsome Hustler likes having her around. And let me tell you, Logan, you punk, Shyanne is more woman than Krista Isadora Duncan and Holly-Wood combine. (tapping tennis racket against Logan's chest) She's younger, sexier, smarter... Logan grabs the racket and throws it down at Cornette's feet. LOGAN I hate to tell you, I'm not as stupid as you think. I know you think my past partying has killed a few braincells, and they probably have, but I see what you're trying to do. You're trying to provoke me, see if you can get under my skin longer enough where I might decided to shove that racket up your ass and get myself suspended for attacking a non-wrestler. I also know the OAOAST wants us to cut back on airing the company's dirty laundry out in the public, but, well... Mr. GM, I'm sorry, I just gotta do this. Hey, Jim, why don't you tell the people a story? You know, that one you told the judge? COACH Judge? CORNETTE (nervous chuckling) I--I don't know what you're talking about. LOGAN (squeezing Corny's left facial cheek) Of course you do, Jimmy. You tried to get a restraining order against me. You had your attorneys working around the clock to find some way to silence me, saying I was a threat to Ned. I am a threat to Ned, but I made it clear I wouldn't go after him...unless he or anyone of you tried something on me first. Then I'd be well within my right to defend myself, of course. So who's really afraid of who, huh? The fans RISE and turn their attention to the right of the screen. CORNETTE (stammering) I... I guess we'll...we'll... just have to wait and see about--about that. And with that, the SOUTH CENTRAL MILITIA appear from the crowd and try ambushing the Heavenly Rockers, but Synth and Logan see them entering via the bottom rope. The Heavenly Rockers and South Central Militia send the fans into a frenzy as they exchange fire in the center of the ring. Very evenly matched. That all changes when Jim Cornette WHALLOPS Synth from behind with the TENNIS RACKET. COLE Damn him! It was a set-up. The Pillsbury Doughboy's missing brother fooled us all. He said the South Central Militia were on a private plane to Seattle to prepare for their match Sunday night against the Heavenly Rockers. It was a lie. All a lie. COACH :lol: The Heavenly Rockers fell for the oldest trick in the book. They're not talking so tough now. Marcellus drops to his knees, being pumpeled in the back with clubbering forearm shots from Logan, so that Vincent has a clear shot to level Mann with a clothesline. The crowd is disgusted by the actions of the 4, some going as far as to throw plastic bottles into the ring, which Moe uses to bash Synth over the head with. While the SCM and Shyanne put the boots to the Heavenly Rockers, Jim Cornette removes his BELT and hands it to Moe. Vincent does the same and the SCM proceed to rip the hide off the backs of the Heavenly Rockers, WHIPPING them with the belts. COLE Just like last week. Marcellus and Vincent whipping the Heavenly Rockers like--like... CABOOSE Goverment mules? COLE (CONT'D) ...a red-headed bastard stepchild. OAOAST officials and agents storm past Tony Schiavone, who bailed outside after the SCM entered the ring, and try making their way into the ring, but Cornette and Shyanne do their best to hold off the officials to allow the SCM to get in a few more lashes. When the officials are unable to gain control, teams such as Los Diablos de Fuego and the All-American Boys come to their and the Heavenly Rockers' aid, causing the SCM to exit at their own free will before everybody hits the ring. COLE Look at the carnage the [i]South Central Militia[i] left behind. That's what Synth and Logan have to deal with at Climax. And after tonight, I don't know if they can. We fade away to commerical with a shot of Logan stuggling to pull himself up, bloody welts on his back. [color=#33CC00]N[/color][color=#FF9900]R[/color][color=#CC33CC]G[/color][/b] Having fun playing beach volleyball on a bright sunny day with bikini-clad beauties is JESSE "THE BODY" VENTURA, sporting an NRG bandana, OAOAST tie-dye tank top, and orange shorts. VENTURA Here are testimonals about NRG, the fastest selling supplement and nutritional drink in the world! CUT TO: In # 72 jersey, former [b]Chicago [color=#FF9900]Bear[/color][/b] WILLIAM "THE REFRIGRATOR" PERRY, who isn't exactly a poster child for weight loss. On-screen graphic reads: [b]William "The Refrigrator" Perry Pro Football Great [/b] William points meancingly to the camera, snarling. THE FRIDGE There's two things I've loved all my life: food and football. Once my playing career was over I knew I had to drop some pounds to stay healthy. I tried everything except gastric-bypass. It wasn't until I discovered NRG that I was able to control my cravings and still enjoy great food, while giving me the extra energy I need to continue doing the things I love. A clip of the Frig sitting on his couch channel-surfing with a bucket of buffalo wings next to him is inserted. THE FRIDGE And if it weren't for NRG, I would have stuffed my face with so many hotdogs and crushed that Japanese chump and brought the Foot-Eating Title back home. Thanks NRG. GRRRRRRRRRRRR! CUT TO: PARIS HILTON and her pet of the week dancing on top of a table at a nightclub. She stops to look into the camera. On-screen graphic: [b]Paris Hilton Socialite/Reality TV Star/Actress/Singer/Dumb Blonde[/b] PARIS NRG gives me the energy to live life to the fullest. That's hot. * blows kiss * (looks off-camera) Do I get paid now? DIRECTOR (Off-Screen) You sure do, honey. Here you go. The "Handsome Hustler" NED BLANCHARD walks in. PARIS You're hot. NED I know. CUT TO: JASON GIAMBI in an empty ballpark hitting homerun after homerun. The camera zooms up behind him, he looks over his shoulders and directly into the camera. [b]Jason Giambi New York Yankees 1st Baseman/DH[/b] GIAMBI Steroids? No. NRG. He turns back to the mound and slugs another homerun off the automatic pitching machine. VENTURA (Voice-Over) NRG, the fastest selling supplement and nutritional drink in the world! Now available at GNC or your local drugstore. CUT TO: Jesse with Jivin' J.R. on the boardwalk. J.R. I've lost 5 pounds of not only my weight but my, BAH GAWD, intestines as well. I've even dropped 3 bra sizes. J.R. rips open his black longsleeve shirt to reveal a tight bra underneath. J.R. Thank you, NRG! NRG! NR--! * BOOM * Philadelphia Flyers center Peter Forsberg (roller)skates into view and body checks J.R. FORESBERG NRG! William "The Refrigrator" Perry falls on top of J.R. from out of nowhere. THE FRIG GET NRG-GIZED!! [b][color=#33CC00]CLIMAX[/color] Sunday, December 18th LIVE! ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW![/b] Edited December 14, 2005 by Tony149 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
