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AnglePalooza 2006

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The OAOAST… What the WORLD is Reading!

 

We fade to black, and then suddenly to a shot of the squared circle. A quote appears on the screen.

 

“Opportunity rarely knocks on your door. Knock rather on opportunity's door if you ardently wish to enter.” – B.C. Forbes, founder and editor of Forbes Magazine.

 

THE VOICE~! Begins, covered by shots of this years’ entrants in the Lethal Rumble.

 

“Tonight, men are given an opportunity...

 

A shot of Leon Rodez and Zack Malibu, hoisting the Tag Team Championships…

 

“To make a statement…”

 

A shot of the Upstarts, with Axel at the helm…

 

“To mark their dominance…”

 

Ragdoll, with Jasmine on his arm…

 

“To return to prominence…”

 

Stephen Joseph, sneering into the camera…

 

“To regain lost glory...”

 

Peter Knight, World Championship shining over his shoulder…

 

“To maintain their dominance…”

 

Alfdogg, Reject, and Thunderkid…

 

“But most of all…

 

Black T…

 

“To become legend.”

 

A final shot of all thirty men in the Rumble, standing in the ring, ready for battle.

 

“Knock. Knock.”

 

*FADE OUT*

 

TheSmartMarks-dot-com… and The One and Only AngleSault Thread Present…

 

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OAOAST AnglePalooza!!!!

 

 

….And we are L-I-V-E in T-Dot, Toronto, Ontario, CA-NA-DA! The crowd is jam-packed into the hiz-ouse, and we go directly to the ramp where Tony Schiavone and Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura are standing by.

 

SCHIAVONE

Ladies and Gentlemen hello, and welcome to OAOAST AnglePalooza Two-Thousand Six! Tony Schiavone here with former Minnesota Governor Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura! Five championship bouts tonight Jesse, and lets not forget the Main Event, thirty men entering into battle in the Lethal Rumble.

 

VENTURA

Big night tonight Tony, because tonight is the night that Stephen Joseph regains his OAOAST Championship!

 

SCHIAVONE

You may think so, but he has a mountain to climb in current champion Peter Knight! We also have the Usual Suspects, Zack Malibu and Leon Rodez, defending their Tag Titles against the New, New Midnight Express!

 

VENTURA

James E. Cornette won’t let this opportunity pass him by!

 

SCHIAVONE

And who could forget Ragdoll’s return to Pay Per View, he faces Gunner Sharps, Falls Count Anywhere.

 

VENTURA

I’ve been looking forward to Ragdoll’s return ever since Axel announced it. He’s hungry.

 

SCHIAVONE

And last, but not least, the Lethal Rumble. During the course of the night all the entrants will be drawing their numbers from the General Manager’s office, and we’ll be right there to cover their reactions. 'Mean' Gene Okerland is standing by backstage with one of the Rumble competitors now. Gene?

 

MEAN GENE OKERLUND

I'm standing by with OAOAST superstar Foshi who is about to draw his number for the Lethal Rumble. Foshi-san, do you have any thoughts on the rumble match tonight?

 

(Okerlund extends the mic to Foshi's mouth area, but Foshi doesn't respond!~)

 

GENE

Well, any thoughts on your match upcoming with Rikjin Massamoto?

 

(Again, Foshi does not reply and just sort of stares at Mean Gene.)

 

GENE

....Well then, why don't you pick your number...

 

(Mean Gene rolls the bingo roller for a few seconds and then stops. Foshi sticks his hand in and pulls out a ball. He glances at the number with virtually no expression.)

 

GENE

Any comments on the number you've drawn? Do you think you have a shot at winning it all?

 

(Foshi looks at Gene and walks away.)

 

GENE

Well, there goes the most emotionally removed son of a bitch I've ever seen. Back to you, guys.

 

SCHIAVONE

Its going to be an interesting night. Well, lets get the ball rolling with our first match of the night, and send it down to ringside where Michael Cole is standing by!

 

We cut to Sofa Central, where Triple C is sitting leisurely preparing for a big night of announcing.

 

COLE

Thanks Tony, Michael Cole here alongside Jonathon Coachman and former OAOAST Champion, Caboose!

 

CABOOSE

Eleven matches and a Lethal Rumble. We’d better be getting paid double for this.

 

COACH

I agree.

 

COLE

:o YOU TWO AGREE ON SOMETHING?

 

COACH

Hey, its money. What’s not to agree on?

 

COLE

This is gonna be a wild ride folks! Let's get to our opening bout!

 

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*KA-CHING~!*

 

*Come and take your Vitamin X.*

 

The fans begin booing, but “Bling-Bling” isn’t the song being played. Instead, an unusual drumbeat is heard over the P.A. system. The fans are confused, although some recognize that the drumbeat is from “When The Levee Breaks” by Led Zeppelin. Then, the voices of three famous white rappers are heard rapping over the drumbeat.

 

*Because mutiny on the bounty's what we're all about

 

I'm gonna board your ship and turn it on out

 

No soft sucker with a parrot on his shoulder

 

Cause I'm bad gettin' bolder cold cold getting colder

 

Terrorizing suckers on the seven seas

 

And if you've got beef you'll get capped in the knees

 

We got sixteen men on a dead man's chest

 

And I shot those suckers and I'll shoot the rest

 

Most illingest b-boy I got that feeling

 

Cause I am most ill and I'm rhymin' and stealin'*

 

As “Rhymin’ And Stealin’” by The Beastie Boys continues playing, the fans turn their attention to the entrance ramp, as right next to the entrance ramp, a red low rider drives into the arena. But it’s not The Parka driving the vehicle. Instead, the red low rider with 20 inch spinning rims is being driven by Cuban Wall, with Vitamin X in the passenger seat. And on the hood of the car is Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez, looking like the world’s sexiest hood ornament, wearing a black and white plaid sweater, blue gym shorts, orange socks with blue stripes, and black dress shoes. She does a split on the hood of the car, and then dances on the hood while Cuban Wall and Vitamin X get out and raise their hands in the air. The crowd boos.

 

COACH

Ladies and gentlemen, you are witnessing the world premiere of the next great tag team in the OAOAST, Brains & Brawn!

 

Dollar signs are superimposed on the entrance ramp. Vitamin X does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle, while Cuban Wall pumps his right fist in the air. Then, Wall, X, and Lindsay walk to the ring as “Rhymin’ And Stealin’” continues playing.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

MICHAEL BUFFER

Ladies and gentlemen, the opening match of Anglepalooza is a Tag Team Tables Match, where in order to win, one team must put both of their opponents through tables. Introducing first, coming to the ring at this time. Accompanied to the ring by The 1st Lady of The Lightning Crew, Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez. At a total combine weight of 533 lbs. Cuban Wall. Vitamin X. BRAINS ANNNNNNNNNNNNNNND BRRRAAWWWWWWWWWWWWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!

 

Vitamin X is wearing a white Lightning Crew T-shirt with a white baseball jersey over it that has VITAMIN X written on the front in black cursive, VX written in black blocky letters on the left sleeve, black elbowpads, black sweatpants, black Reebok sneakers, and a gold chain around his neck. On the back of X’s jersey is “WALL!” written on the top of the jersey in big black blocky letters, the OAOAST Anglepalooza logo in the center, and “GET THE TABLES!” written underneath it in big black blocky letters with JANUARY 29, 2006 written underneath that, also in big black blocky letters.

 

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COLE

This is Brains & Brawn first match since forming three weeks ago on HeldDOWN~!, and they’re about to debut in a Tag Team Tables Match at Anglepalooza!

 

COACH

I can’t wait for this one, Cole! Brains & Brawn begin their road to the top tonight at Anglepalooza, and they’re going to do it against a team that doesn’t deserve to be in the OAOAST, let alone face them tonight!

 

COLE

I notice that Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez is accompanying Brains & Brawn to ringside.

 

CABOOSE

Yup. Tha Puerto Rican now shares Lindsay’s managerial services with Brains & Brawn.

 

COLE

Does she share them in bed too?

 

CABOOSE

Now that’s not nice. How dare you say such a thing about a sweet and innocent girl like Lindsay?

 

COLE

She doesn’t look so sweet and innocent to me.

 

Vitamin X dances to “Rhymin’ And Stealin’” while Cuban Wall shadowboxes. Both men jaw with the fans.

 

COLE

Incase you’re wondering why this match is taking place, 4 weeks ago on HeldDOWN~!, Vitamin X took on John “Rock Hard” Brickston in a one-on-one match.

 

The OAOAST Anglepalooza logo flashes across the screen as footage from the Vitamin X/John Brickston match is shown. A caption reading, 4 WEEKS AGO, is on the bottom right hand corner of the screen.

 

COLE (V.O.)

The lasted only a minute as Cuban Wall came into the ring and attacked Brickston. VX and Wall did a beatdown on Brickston, which culminated in X doing The Leap Of Faith onto Brickston through a table which was on the outside! Afterwards, Vitamin X and Cuban Wall decided to form a tag team.

 

CABOOSE

Actually, it’s Cuban Wall and Vitamin X. Get it right.

 

COLE (V.O.)

Whatever. Anyway, the next week, Brains & Brawn was born.

 

The OAOAST Anglepalooza logo flashes across the screen again. Footage of Brains & Brawn beating up Spanish Fly and John “Rock Hard” Brickston is shown. A caption reading, 3 WEEKS AGO, appears on the bottom right hand corner of the screen.

 

COLE (V.O.)

And to celebrate, Cuban Wall and Vitamin X attacked John “Rock Hard” Brickston and Spanish Fly backstage. Wall and X attacked Brickston first, but Fly came to the rescue, only to also get beaten by Brains & Brawn.

 

COACH (V.O.)

That was great!

 

COLE (V.O.)

Oh shut up.

 

The OAOAST Anglepalooza logo flashes across the screen again. A caption reading, 2 WEEKS AGO, appears on the bottom right hand corner of the screen.

 

COLE (V.O.)

Then, 2 weeks ago on HeldDOWN~!, Brains & Brawn attacked Spanish Fly backstage and threw him through a table! The OAOAST officials pulled Vitamin X and Cuban Wall away before they could do anymore damage, but not before “Cowboy” Bill Watts made this match for tonight!

 

COACH

Brains & Brawn had no problem with this match being made. Infact, they WANTED this match to be made!

 

COLE

Yes. Vitamin X blames Spanish Fly, Colombian Heat, and John Brickston for costing him his No Disqualification Match against Otaku II last month at Climax. He believes he would have won the match if it weren’t for Fly, Heat, and Brickston stopping The Lightning Crew from interfering. PRL is facing Colombian Heat tonight, so Vitamin X gets Spanish Fly and John Brickston in a Tag Team Tables Match!

 

The OAOAST Anglepalooza logo flashes across the screen again. Vitamin X hops onto a turnbuckle and crosses his arms in an X. Cuban Wall enters the ring, and stands in the middle of it with a serious look on his face. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez claps. Vitamin X hops off the turnbuckle. A spotlight shines on Vitamin X, Cuban Wall, and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez, and the three of them do The Lightning Crew Salute as a lightning bolt hits the entrance. The crowd boos loudly.

 

COLE

Vitamin X has a big night ahead of him. Not only is he competing in this Tag Team Tables Match, but he will also be in Tha Puerto Rican’s corner when he takes on Colombian Heat for the 24/7 Title later on, AND he will also be in the Lethal Rumble Match, which is the main event for Anglepalooza!

 

CABOOSE

Vitamin X has the chance of a lifetime tonight! He can win the Lethal Rumble and go onto AngleMania to become OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion!

 

COLE

But will he do that OR will he help his boss, Tha Puerto Rican, win the Lethal Rumble?

 

CABOOSE

Uh…you know…I’m not so sure.

 

The lights go back on in the arena. Vitamin X does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle and chats with Lindsay. Cuban Wall jaws with the fans, and then gets on a second turnbuckle and raises his hands in the air. The crowd boos. Cuban Wall gets off the second turnbuckle and shadowboxes a bit, and then chats with Vitamin X and Lindsay as “Rhymin’ And Stealin” by the Beastie Boys dies down.

 

COACH

What an entrance for Brains & Brawn!

 

CABOOSE

Yeah, Lindsay looked so hot! Hot! HOT!

 

COLE

Well, we know that Brains & Brawn can talk the talk, but can they walk the walk?

 

CABOOSE

They can and they will.

 

The lights go down in the arena. Two spotlights shine on the entrance. After five seconds, Spanish Fly shoots out from underneath the entrance stage with pyro right behind him. Spanish Fly raises his right hand in the air causing the crowd to cheer. “Krokodilamadurinn” by Quarashi starts playing, as Spanish Fly points to both sides of the arena. Fly points to the entrance, and out comes John “Rock Hard” Brickston, who lets out a mighty roar. Brickston acknowledges the crowd, pointing to both sides of the entrance stage, getting the crowd pumped up. Brickston high fives Spanish Fly, and together, they walk down the entrance ramp, slapping hands with the fans along the way.

 

BUFFER

And their opponents. At a total combine weight of 390 lbs. The team of Spanish Fly and JOHN “ROCK HARDDDDDDDDDDD” BRICKSTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!

 

COLE

Spanish Fly and John Brickston looking for some revenge against Brains & Brawn for their actions these past three weeks!

 

COACH

Yeah? Well, they’re not getting any revenge whatsoever tonight, because Brains & Brawn are going to pick up the win in their pay-per-view debut!

 

Spanish Fly gives his Spanish Fly silver chain to a young fan at ringside. Fly and Brickston enter the ring. Brickston lets out a mighty roar. He raises his hands in the air, which pops the crowd. Spanish Fly and John Brickston both get on second turnbuckles. Spanish Fly raises his hands in the air, while John points to the crowd with a smile on his face as the crowd cheers the two popular good guys. Brains & Brawn and Lindsay are on the outside, looking at the two with disgust.

 

COACH

No Chance In Hell of beating Brains & Brawn! Not a chance in Hell!

 

Spanish Fly hops off the turnbuckle he was on, and gets on another second turnbuckle, raising his hands in the air to another pop. Fly and Brickston both get off the turnbuckles and talk as the lights go back on in the arena. They glare angrily at Brains & Brawn, who are taunting them on the outside.

 

COLE

The two teams are putting the badmouth on each other, moments before the match starts!

 

COACH

Can you see the look of fear on Brickston and Fly’s faces? They’re absolutely terrified of having to fight Brains & Brawn.

 

COLE

I don’t see any look of fear at all.

 

CABOOSE

It’s there; you just have to look closely.

 

COLE

Oh come on.

 

Brains & Brawn both receive a good luck kiss from Lindsay. They enter the ring and stare at Spanish Fly and John Brickston. Fly removes his Spanish Fly T-shirt from around his waist. Referee Charles Robinson calls for the bell.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

TAG TEAM TABLES MATCH

BRAINS & BRAWN (with Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez) vs. JOHN “ROCK HARD” BRICKSTON AND SPANISH FLY

The crowd pops, ready for the first match of Anglepalooza 2006. Vitamin X and Cuban Wall argue about who gets to wrestle first.

 

VITAMIN X

I start.

 

CUBAN WALL

No, I start.

 

VITAMIN X

No me.

 

WALL

Me.

 

VX

Me!

 

WALL

Me!

 

VX

ME!

 

WALL

ME!!!

 

VX

ME!!!

 

Cuban Wall punches Vitamin X in the jaw!

 

VITAMIN X

Okay. You start.

 

Cuban Wall and Vitamin X high ten each other, and then X leaves the ring. John “Rock Hard” Brickston will start for his team. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez cheers Wall on.

 

COLE

And we begin the opening match of Anglepalooza 2006!

 

Cuban Wall stretches on the ropes. He circles the ring with Brickston. They lock up. Cuban Wall nails “Rock Hard” with CLUBBERIN’~! THEY BE CLUBBERIN’~! forearms. He whips Brickston into the ropes, and follows with a flying clothesline. He then picks up Brickston, and gives him a shoulderbreaker.

 

COLE

Look at the power of Cuban Wall! He picked up the 6’6” John Brickston and just gave him a shoulderbreaker like it was nothing!

 

Cuban Wall tags in Vitamin X, and the crowd instantly showers him with boos. X hits Brickston with fast kicks all over his body. He picks “Rock Hard” up, and then bounces off the ropes, giving him a front dropkick to the knees. Brickston falls to his knees. VX tags in Cuban Wall, who bounces off the ropes, and shocks the crowd by giving Brickston a shining wizard!

 

COACH

Did you see that? Cuban Wall is an incredible athlete, and he just showed us by doing a shining wizard! Tell me what 6’7” pro wrestler can do that?

 

COLE

Cuban Wall is not done yet. A double-armed DDT by the big man!

 

CW does a legdrop onto John Brickston’s throat. The crowd starts chanting, “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” in reference to The Lightning Crew’s leader.

 

CABOOSE

P.R. DOESN’T suck! And he’ll prove it to you later tonight!

 

Wall chokes John Brickston, but Charles Robinson stops him at the count of 4. Cuban Wall picks up John Brickston, and then tags in Vitamin X. Vitamin X starts doing the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle, drawing boos. He punches John. He punches him again. X does then Shane-O-Mac Shuffle. And then punches Brickston in the face, but it doesn’t knock him down. So, VX heads to the ropes, hops onto Brickston’s back, and brings him down with a floatover DDT!

 

VITAMIN X

BOO-YAH~!

 

CROWD

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~!

 

VX tags back in Cuban Wall.

 

COLE

Quick tags abound with Brains & Brawn!

 

Cuban Wall scoops up John Brickston, holding him in a fallaway slam position. Cuban Wall runs into a turnbuckle, slamming Brickston’s back against it. He then runs into a second turnbuckle, and slams John’s back against it. Wall runs into a third turnbuckle, slamming John Brickston’s back against that. Finally, Cuban Wall runs into the fourth turnbuckle, and slams John “Rock Hard” Brickston’s against it. Cuban Wall finishes with a powerslam.

 

VITAMIN X

YEAH! THAT’S MY BOY! THAT’S MY BOY!

 

The crowd, becoming more annoyed with Vitamin X by the second, boos X for that comment. CW picks John “Rock Hard” Brickston up and whips him into his corner. Cuban Wall charges forward, hitting “Rock Hard” with an avalanche! Vitamin X continues the assault, choking John Brickston with the tag rope! Charles Robinson sees this, and tells X to stop. The X-Man pleads innocence, but the crowd sees right through him and boos.

 

“X’S A PUSS-SEE!” *Clap Clap Clapclapclap*

“X’S A PUSS-SEE!” *Clap Clap Clapclapclap*

“X’S A PUSS-SEE!” *Clap Clap Clapclapclap*

“X’S A PUSS-SEE!” *Clap Clap Clapclapclap*

 

COACH

HE IS NOT!

 

CABOOSE

Hey, that’s my line!

 

COACH

Da Coach just made that line better!

 

CABOOSE

Mumble. Mumble. Mumble. Mumble.

 

Wall elbows “Rock Hard” Brickston in the corner. He follows by choking “Rock Hard”. Charles Robinson admonishes him for that. While that happens, Vitamin X punches Brickston in the chest.

 

COLE

These two teams are wrestling a normal tag team match. The tables have yet to come into play in this match!

 

Cuban Wall punches Brickston in the face, and Brickston responds by punching Wall in the face! Wall punches Brickston in the face again. Brickston punches Wall in the face! Wall punches Brickston in the face! Brickston punches Wall in the face a third time! Wall knees Brickston in the stomach, and then hits him with the CLUBBERIN’~! THEY BE CLUBBERIN’~! forearms. Cuban Wall gives Brickston an Irish Whip into the ropes, and then does a sidewalk slam on Brickston!

 

COLE

John Brickston has taken an extreme amount of punishment in these first five minutes!

 

COACH

And it’ll only get worse from here!

 

Cuban Wall picks up John Brickston. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS!” again. Suddenly, Brickston gets a sudden burst of energy and punches Wall in the face. Wall punches him back. This leads to a slugfest, which quickly ends with Cuban Wall scratches John Brickston’s eyes. Wall places Brickston in between his legs, and then gives him a piledriver! Wall stomps on Brickston. Vitamin X enters the ring and joins in on the stomping! The crowd boos.

 

COLE

Why doesn’t the ref stop this?

 

Brains & Brawn stop the stomping. Vitamin X shoves Cuban Wall. Cuban Wall responds by punching Vitamin X in the jaw.

 

VITAMIN X (while holding his jaw)

Okay. Let’s try this again.

 

Vitamin X whispers something in Cuban Wall’s ear. Cuban Wall nods his head. Vitamin X shoves Cuban Wall.

 

VITAMIN X

WALL!

 

CUBAN WALL

WHAT?

 

VITAMIN X

GET THE TABLES!

 

CUBAN WALL

OKAY!

 

VITAMIN X

Hee hee. I’ve always wanted to do that.

 

Cuban Wall exits the ring. The crowd starts booing again, knowing what’s coming up next.

 

COACH

All right! Here we go! It’s table time baby! It’s table time!

 

COLE

Cuban Wall is going to get a table. It looks like Brains & Brawn are ready to end this match!

 

Wall searches underneath the ring, and comes out a few seconds later with a table. Wall has a smirk on his face as he heads to the ring…but from out of nowhere, Spanish Fly comes crashing down on Wall with a tope suicida!

 

COLE

Whoa! An incredible move! An incredible move from Spanish Fly! He leaped onto Cuban Wall with that tope suicida!

 

COACH

And Spanish Fly may have just committed suicide by doing that move on Cuban Wall!

 

Spanish Fly gets off of Cuban Wall, and kicks him when he’s down. But then Vitamin X grabs Spanish Fly, and whips him into the ring steps!

 

COACH

See. I told you.

 

As Spanish Fly crumbles to the mat, Vitamin X enters the ring again…and is floored with a MASSIVE clothesline from John Brickston!

 

COLE

My God! The impact!

 

Brickston stomps on Vitamin X, making the crowd very happy. He lets out a mighty roar, and then bounces off the ropes…but gets tripped by Cuban Wall!

 

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NELSON MUNTZ

HA! HA!

 

COLE

Cuban Wall and Vitamin X are now back in control!

 

Cuban Wall enters the ring. X tells him to go up. Brains & Brawn pick up John “Rock Hard” Brickston while Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez cheers them on. Brains & Brawn take Brickston over to a turnbuckle, where they seat him on the top.

 

COLE

Brains & Brawn look to be going for something dangerous here.

 

Cuban Wall punches John Brickston. Meanwhile, Vitamin X exits the ring to grab the table Cuban Wall brought out. He enters the ring with the table and measures the distance from the turnbuckle to the table. He sets up the table in just the right spot, and then joins Wall in beating John Brickston.

 

CABOOSE

Vitamin X showing us why he’s the Brains of Brains & Brawn!

 

Cuban Wall and Vitamin X both get on the second rope. They stand Brickston up on the top rope, and then both place him in a front facelock. The crowd stands up, sensing that “Rock Hard” is going to be eliminated.

 

COLE

We maybe seeing the first elimination!

 

CABOOSE

Come on Brains & Brawn! Come on!

 

Vitamin X and Cuban Wall both have John Brickston in the suplex position, ready to deliver a superplex to him through the table. While this is going on, Spanish Fly has entered the ring. He quickly grabs the table and pulls it back so that Brickston can’t go through it. Brains & Brawn do a double superplex on John “Rock Hard” Brickston onto the mat, but not through the table! The crowd cheers.

 

COLE

And Spanish Fly saves his partner from getting some wood!

 

CABOOSE

WHAT?

 

COLE

I meant that Spanish Fly just saved John Brickston from being eliminated.

 

CABOOSE

Then why didn’t you just say that?

 

COLE

I wanted to be funny.

 

CABOOSE

Well, you’re not. So just stop.

 

Vitamin X and Cuban Wall’s smiles fade when they realize that John Brickston did not go through a table. They argue with each other, blaming the other for not noticing the table wasn’t there. Cuban Wall shoves X, and then punches him in the jaw.

 

CUBAN WALL

Next time LOOK!

 

Vitamin X notices Spanish Fly coming towards him. Vitamin X ducks, bounces off the ropes, and SPEARS~! him down! Vitamin X does some mounted punches on Spanish Fly, while Cuban Wall grabs the table that Fly moved and props it on a turnbuckle.

 

COLE

Brains & Brawn are going to try again.

 

COACH

If at first you don’t succeed, try try again.

 

With the table set, Cuban Wall and Vitamin X grab Spanish Fly. They whip him into the table---NO!---John Brickston tackles Spanish Fly down just before he could crash through the table!

 

COLE

What a save by John Brickston! He just saved Spanish Fly just in the nick of time!

 

CABOOSE

Oh come on! That’s not right!

 

COLE

How is that not right? It’s a Tag Team Tables Match, so it’s perfectly acceptable.

 

CABOOSE

Well…I don’t like it.

 

Brains & Brawn do a beatdown on John Brickston, who is trying to get up. The crowd gets loud, trying to make Brickston make the comeback. Brickston shoves Vitamin X AND Cuban Wall away from him! He lets out a mighty roar! John “Rock Hard” Brickston punches Vitamin X! John “Rock Hard” Brickston punches Cuban Wall! Punch for Vitamin X! Punch for Cuban Wall! X! Wall! X! Wall! Mighty roar! Brickston sees that Cuban Wall is on his left knee, so Brickston charges forward, leaping into the air, grabbing Wall by the head, and giving him The Throwback!

 

COLE

A phenomenal move from John Brickston! And he did it on Cuban Wall!

 

John Brickston picks up Cuban Wall and whips him into the ropes. He gives him a big boot to the face! Wall doesn’t fall, so John Brickston Irish whips him into the ropes…and then gives Cuban Wall a SPINEBUSTER~!

 

CABOOSE

Oh boy.

 

COLE

Oh boy is right. The 6’6” 215 John Brickston has just given the 6’7” 285 Cuban Wall a spinebuster! Just another example of the amazing strength of John “Rock Hard” Brickston!

 

COACH

“Rock Hard” sucks!

 

As Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez starts to panic on the outside, Vitamin X heads to the top rope. But before VX can do anything, John Brickston rushes forward, grabbing VX and slamming him off the top rope onto the mat! Meanwhile, Cuban Wall is getting up. Spanish Fly is also climbing the top rope. Once Cuban Wall is at a vertical base, Spanish Fly flies off the top rope, grabbing Cuban Wall with his legs and giving him a hurricarana! The Muscle of The Lightning Crew goes down!

 

COLE

This is total chaos! All four men are in the ring fighting it out!

 

Spanish Fly gets up and high fives John Brickston.

 

*DING!*

 

Vitamin X low blows Spanish Fly!

 

COLE

And oh! What a cheapshot!

 

VX grabs Spanish Fly, and quickly takes him to the mat, applying the Lethal Injection on him!

 

COLE

The Lethal Injection! Vitamin X is applying his version of the STF on Spanish Fly!

 

COACH

But why? Submissions don’t count in a Tables Match!

 

CABOOSE

Vitamin X is doing this to weaken Spanish Fly. He’s doing this so that it’ll be easier to throw him through a table. Once again, X is showing us why he’s the Brains of Brains & Brawn!

 

Vitamin X cinches in the hold. Spanish Fly taps out, but since submissions don’t count in a Tag Team Tables Match, the match must continue. Vitamin X lets go of the Lethal Injection. He lays into Spanish Fly with fast kicks all over his body. Suddenly, John Brickston grabs him from behind. Full Nelson Slam! Afterwards, John Brickston does the “You can’t see me!” hand gesture!

 

COLE

“You can’t see me!” Full Nelson Slam!

 

COACH

Oh come on X! Come on Wall! Take care of that big galoot and put him through a table!

 

Cuban Wall attacks John Brickston. He attacks him with the CLUBBERIN’~! THEY BE CLUBBERIN’~! forearms. CW gives “Rock Hard” an Irish whip into the ropes. Brickston reverses, and kicks Wall in the stomach. Spanish Fly follows that by doing a spinning neckbreaker on Wall! Spanish Fly and John Brickston wait for Wall to get up.

 

JOHN “ROCK HARD” BRICKSTON

COME ON, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!

 

Cuban Wall gets to his feet. John “Rock Hard” Brickston charges forward, clotheslining Cuban Wall over the top rope and onto the floor! Cuban Wall and John Brickston brawl on the outside. Meanwhile, Spanish Fly picks up Vitamin X.

 

*DING!*

 

COLE

He did it again! Did you see that? He did it again!

 

COACH

I saw it and I loved it! Two low blows to Spanish Fly! Excellent work by Vitamin X!

 

Spanish Fly crumbles to the mat. Vitamin X, who is now fatigued, crawls over to the table that was placed on the turnbuckle and uses it to get to his feet.

 

CABOOSE

Oh. I feel bad for Vitamin X! He’s sweating. He’s out of breath. This match has taken its affect on him. The poor guy.

 

Vitamin X takes the table and exits the ring. He places the table next to the ring, with evil intentions in mind. X then gets back into the ring. He picks up Spanish Fly and gives him a snap suplex. He picks up Fly again, does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle. Vitamin X nails Fly with several knife-edged chops to the chest, turning it red. VX whips Fly into the ropes, and follows that up with a BAAAAAAAACK BODY DROP!

 

VITAMIN X

BOO-YAH~!

 

CROWD

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~!

 

Vitamin X picks Fly up and punches him in the face. He punches him all the way to the ropes, next to the table.

 

“KILL THE X-MAN!” *Clap Clap Clapclapclap*

“KILL THE X-MAN!” *Clap Clap Clapclapclap*

“KILL THE X-MAN!” *Clap Clap Clapclapclap*

“KILL THE X-MAN!” *Clap Clap Clapclapclap*

 

COLE

These fans in Toronto despise Vitamin X!

 

CABOOSE

And I’m sure Vitamin X despises each and every one of them!

 

Vitamin X glances at the crowd, letting them know that the chants are annoying him. X goes back to work, applying a facelock on Spanish Fly, and then putting Fly’s left arm over his head. Vitamin X grabs Fly’s red leather pants and lifts him up, placing him on the ring apron, only a few inches away from the table. The crowd starts buzzing, fearing that Spanish Fly will soon be eliminated.

 

COLE

And now Spanish Fly is only a few moments away from being eliminated!

 

COACH

Oh boy! Here we go! The end is here for Spanish Fly! HA! HA!

 

X is still holding onto Spanish Fly in a suplex position. VX lifts Spanish Fly up. Spanish Fly won’t budge. X tries again. Fly still won’t budge. X tries a third time. Fly escapes the suplex, and punches X in the face! He punches him enough that X becomes dazed. Fly sees something behind him and smiles. He pushes Vitamin X away from him…into the hands of John “Rock Hard” Brickston! Brickston places X on his shoulders, causing the crowd to cheer.

 

COACH

No! No! Run X! Run!

 

COLE

It could be time for the Killswitch! Could it be!?

 

Brickston walks over to the ropes. He sees the table on the outside. Brickston looks at the crowd, smiles…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

AND THROWS VITAMIN X OVER THE TOP ROPE THROUGH THE TABLE!!!

 

COACH

AW DAMN!

 

COLE

John Brickston has eliminated Vitamin X! John Brickston has some payback from last Thursday on HeldDOWN~! when Vitamin X eliminated him from the Survivor Series Elimination Match!

 

****************************************************************

1st Elimination: Vitamin X (9:43)

Eliminated By: John “Rock Hard” Brickston

Left In The Match: Cuban Wall, Spanish Fly, and John “Rock Hard” Brickston

****************************************************************

 

Vitamin X lies in the wreckage of the table. John “Rock Hard” Brickston and Spanish Fly trash talk X. While this is going on, Cuban Wall has gotten another table from underneath the ring, and is setting it up on the outside.

 

COLE

Spanish Fly and John “Rock Hard” Brickston better keep an eye out for Cuban Wall. He has another table set up on the other side of the ring!

 

Cuban Wall finishes setting up the table. He attacks Fly and John Brickston. Wall punches Fly and Brickston in the face several times. Wall attacks Brickston with the CLUBB—uh, with the forearms. The forearms bring Brickston down to one knee. Cuban Wall throws John Brickston out of the ring!

 

COLE

John Brickston is out of the way, and now Cuban Wall can take advantage of Spanish Fly!

 

Wall beats on Spanish Fly, weakening him enough that he can grab him by his mask and throw him over the top rope and through the table that he had set up on the outside! The crowd groans as Fly flies through the table!

 

COLE

And now Spanish Fly has gotten some wood!

 

COACH

 

CABOOSE

 

COLE

I mean, Spanish Fly has just gone through a table, meaning he is eliminated!

 

*****************************************************************2nd Elimination: Spanish Fly (11:22)

Eliminated By: Cuban Wall

Left In The Match: Cuban Wall and John “Rock Hard” Brickston

*****************************************************************

 

Spanish Fly lies in the wreckage of the table, unconscious.

 

COLE

So it’s down to two men. Cuban Wall and John Brickston! This is the last elimination. Whoever goes through a table next will lose the match for his team! Who’s it going to be?

 

COACH

Come on Cuban Wall! Come on Cuban Wall! Come on!

 

CABOOSE

Let’s go Wall!

 

The crowd is now fired up, after having seen the previous two eliminations. John Brickston beats on Cuban Wall. But Cuban Wall fights back, and it leads into a slugfest between the two, won by Brickston. Brickston whips Wall into the ropes—NO—Wall reverses, kicks Brickston in the stomach, and lifts him up, giving him a POWERBOMB!

 

COLE

Oh my God! Did you see that?

 

COACH

I can’t believe my eyes! Cuban Wall is awesome!

 

CABOOSE

Yeah! That’s the way you do it, Wall! YEAH BABY!

 

The crowd is shocked. Cuban Wall looks down at John Brickston, who is convulsing on the mat. Wall has a smirk on his face as he pumps his right fist in the air. The crowd boos loudly, chanting, “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” Wall yells at the crowd.

 

COLE

Cuban Wall just powerbombed John Brickston! CUBAN WALL JUST POWERBOMBED JOHN BRICKSTON!

 

CABOOSE

Eh, I heard you the first time. I know this is a great moment, but still. Chill.

 

COLE

Cuban Wall must be the strongest man in the OAOAST! He lifted up the 6’6” 215 lb. John Brickston with ease! He didn’t have any trouble picking him up whatsoever!

 

Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez applauds Cuban Wall for his powerbomb. Wall exits the ring, and goes underneath the ring again. He searches for something as the crowd anxiously awaits him bringing out a table.

 

COLE

And now, this could be the end! This could be the nail in the coffin! Cuban Wall can throw John Brickston through a table and end this match!

 

Cuban Wall brings out a table from underneath the ring. He points to it with a smirk on his face. Wall throws the table into the ring. John “Rock Hard” Brickston hasn’t gotten up yet. CW enters the ring. He sets up the table in the center of the ring. Brickston is starting to show signs of life, pulling his head up. Wall picks up Brickston and pumps his right fist in the air again. The crowd boos. Suddenly, John Brickston punches Cuban Wall in the jaw! Another slugfest erupts between the two big men. Brickston gains the advantage. He whips Wall into the ropes. He hits Wall with a shoulderblock. Wall doesn’t fall! Brickston punches Wall’s face, and then whips him into the ropes again. He hits Wall with another shoulderblock. Wall STILL doesn’t fall. Brickston punches Wall in the face, and whips him into the ropes. This time, John grabs Wall and gives him a Bossman Slam!

 

COLE

Bossman Slam!

 

COACH

No! No! NO!

 

Lindsay is starting to get worry on the outside. Brickston exits the ring and climbs to the top rope. The crowd starts cheering, since it’s rare for a man of Brickston’s size to go to the top.

 

COLE

What could he be planning from up there?

 

COACH

I don’t know, but I know I won’t like it!

 

Cuban Wall slowly gets to his feet. Once he does, John “Rock Hard” Brickston jumps off the top rope with a flying crossbody onto Cuban Wall!

 

COACH

Did he just do what I think he did?

 

COLE

Yes he did, Coach. Yes he did.

 

COACH

Oh God!

 

John Brickston gets up, and lets out a mighty roar. The crowd cheers. Brickston points to Wall, and then to the table. The crowd cheers again.

 

COLE

I think John Brickston is signaling for the end!

 

Brickston waits for Cuban Wall to get up. The big man is slow getting up, his stamina meter empty. Wall gets to his knees.

 

COACH

Look! Lindsay’s on the apron!

 

Indeed, Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez gets on the ring apron. Charles Robinson tells her to get off the apron, but Lindsay refuses. Instead, she flirts with the ref, but Lil’ Naitch will have none of that. Meanwhile, Cuban Wall has gotten to his feet. He turns around, gets kicked in the gut by John Brickston, and then placed on “Rock Hard”’s shoulders. The crowd cheers, knowing that The Killswitch is up next. But, John is distracted when he sees Lindsay on the ring apron. Brickston puts Wall down, and walks up to Lindsay.

 

CABOOSE

If he puts just one hand on her, so help me God.

 

COLE

Brickston is having some words with Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez!

 

John and Lindsay argue. She goes to slap him…but “Rock Hard” blocks the slap! Brickston grabs Lindsay by her long black hair and pulls her into the ring!

 

CABOOSE

HE PUT A HAND ON HER! HE PUT A HAND ON HER! ARREST THAT MAN! ARREST THAT MAN!

 

Lindsay lands on her back. John picks her up by her hair again. He yells something at her, and then looks at the crowd. They cheer.

 

CABOOSE

Ugh. This crowd is full of misogynists!

 

Brickston asks the crowd if they want him to give her The Killswitch. The crowd cheers. John “Rock Hard” Brickston places Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez on his shoulders.

 

COACH

NO! NO! NO!

 

Brickston parades around the ring with Lindsay on his shoulders, a smile on his face. Suddenly, Cuban Wall punches Brickston in the back. He does this several times, which leads to him letting Lindsay go.

 

COACH

Oh. Thank God. Thank You Cuban Wall!

 

John Brickston strikes back, nailing Wall with lefts and rights up the wazoo! He Irish whips Wall into the ropes. Cuban Wall reverses.

 

*BAM!*

 

VITAMIN X HITS JOHN BRICKSTON IN THE BACK WITH A CHAIR!

 

Right after Brickston gets hit in the back with a chair, he walks right into a goozle from Cuban Wall. Cuban Wall smiles evilly as he lifts John Brickston up…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

AND CHOKESLAMS HIM RIGHT THROUGH THE TABLE!

 

COLE

That’s it! The match is over!

 

*DING DING DING* (16:04)

 

****************************************************************

3rd Elimination: John “Rock Hard” Brickston (16:04)

Eliminated By: Cuban Wall

Left In The Match: Cuban Wall

****************************************************************

 

****************************************************************

TEH WINNORS~!

Brains & Brawn

****************************************************************

 

COACH

YES! HA! HA! Way to go Brains & Brawn! Way to go!

 

“Rhymin’ And Stealin’” by The Beastie Boys starts playing. Cuban Wall celebrates his team’s win, and taunts John “Rock Hard” Brickston, who lies in the what’s left of the table. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez is jumping up and down on the outside, which is great news for the fans in the front row. Vitamin X slowly rolls into the ring, and breathes a sigh of relief.

 

BUFFER

Here are your winners…BRAINS ANNNNNNNNNNNNNDDD BRRAWWWWWWWWWWWWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!

 

Lindsay hugs Wall and X. Wall goes to punch X in the jaw, causing X to duck for cover, but Wall changes his mind and high fives X, telling him he did a “good job tonight.” The crowd boos.

 

COLE

Brains & Brawn come up with the win in their first match together at Anglepalooza!

 

COACH

I’m not surprised, Cole! Brains & Brawn have all the tools needed to succeed in the OAOAST Tag Team Division, and they just proved it tonight! And this is only the beginning; soon, you’ll be calling Brains & Brawn the One And Only AngleSault Thread World Tag Team Champions!

 

CABOOSE

Vitamin X wanted Cuban Wall to get the tables? Well, he got the tables all right! And they sent John Brickston and Spanish Fly right through those tables! HA! HA!

 

COLE

This was certainly a big win for Vitamin X and Cuban Wall.

 

CABOOSE

That’s Cuban Wall and Vitamin X.

 

COLE

As I was saying, this was a big win for Brains & Brawn. The OAOAST Tag Team Division is the toughest tag team division in professional wrestling today. These guys are looking to make an impact in the Tag Team Division, and what a way to do it, starting Anglepalooza with a victory over Spanish Fly and John “Rock Hard” Brickston!

 

Cuban Wall raises a piece of the table John Brickston was chokeslammed through over his head. He then throws it away. Brains & Brawn and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez leave the ring, evil smiles on their faces. Charles Robinson raises Brains & Brawn’s hands in victory on the outside. Cuban Wall, Vitamin X, and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez walk up the entrance ramp.

 

COLE

The Lightning Crew starts off the night on the right track. How big of a night will it be for The LC? Will Tha Puerto Rican be able to retain the 24/7 Title against Colombian Heat? And will a Lightning Crew member win the Lethal Rumble?

 

CABOOSE

Yes and yes. This is going to be a great night for The Lightning Crew. Tonight, at Anglepalooza, The Lightning Crew will go 3-0! Mark my words! They’re already 1-0. Only 2 more wins to go! This is going to be a great night for The LC!

 

COLE

Well, we will find out if you’re right tonight at Anglepalooza!

 

Brains & Brawn and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez raise their hands in the air, laughing evilly. The crowd boos loudly. The three LC members leave through the entrance as “Rhymin’ And Stealin’” by the Beastie Boys continues playing.

 

******************************************************

 

We cut to the GM's office where Axel and the CHAMP~! Peter Knight are standing by, next to the Lethal Rumble drawing barrel.

 

AXEL

PK, this is going to be a hell of a night. You ready?

 

PK

Am I ready? For what, a broken down injured Stephen Joseph?

 

Axel and PK both chuckle, and look at the TV screen replay of the Tables Match finish, before we go back to the arena.

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COLE

Well Axel and PK look evil, but its time for our first singles match of the evening, between two very interesting OAOAST Superstars!

 

BUFFER

The following contest is scheduled for one fall!

 

Symphony X's Evolution(The Grand Design) blares throughout the arena as the crowd rises to their feet in a big pop.

 

BUFFER

Introducing first, from Kyoto, Japan, weighing in tonight at two-hundred seventeen pounds, he is FOOOOOOOOSHI!

 

The crowd gives a nice ovation as Foshi makes his way down the aisle. He slides into the ring and walks to a corner, mentally preparing for the match. He looks up as his music dies down and "Unholy" by Kiss begins to play.

 

BUFFER

And his oponent, from Tokyo, Japan, weighing in at two-hundred thirty two pounds, he is RIKJIN MASAMOOOOOOOTOOOOO!

 

Another big pop from the crowd as Rikjin makes his way to the ring. He climbs up to the top rope and moonsaults into the ring. Foshi almost seems as though he doesn't notice Rikjin's presence as he continues staring straight.

 

COLE

This is a rematch from Rikjin Massamoto's debut to the OAOAST just a month ago at Climax. Since then, tension has been building between the two, although it has really been just that: tension. This will be the first time these two are on the opposite ends of a battle since their last matchup.

 

COACH

I just think it's a bit unfair that Rikjin Massamoto has not been entered into the Lethal Rumble later tonight. I mean, Foshi's in the match. He's allowed to work double duty, why can't Rikjin? It's a conspiracy.

 

COLE

Well, you should also consider that Foshi is at a distinct disadvantage because of that. Rikjin knows after this match, he's off for the night. He can let it all lose here. Foshi, on the other hand, is probably going to want to conserve some of his energy for the Lethal Rumble.

 

CABOOSE

Not to mention that, especially with an opponent like Rikjin, if you're not focusing exclusively on him, there's very little chance for victory. Foshi should not be thinking about the rumble until after this match.

 

Rikjin's music finally dies down as the bell rings to signal the start of the match.

 

COLE

And we're underway.

 

Foshi and Rikjin meet in the middle of the ring. They have a brief staredown before Rikjin extends a closed fist. Foshi looks down and obliges, meeting with a fist pump which is met with applause from the crowd. The two begin to circle each other. They lock up in the center of the ring. There is a struggle before Rikjin powers Foshi into the corner. Upon the ref's request, he gives a clean break.

 

COACH

Oh, isn't this touching? They're going to be nice to each other. Someone needs to tell them both you don't get anywhere by being nice.

 

COLE

This isn't about being nice. This is about competition. These two wrestle to see truly who the better man is. That's all this is about.

 

They lock up in the center once again. Foshi gets an advantage and goes behind with a hammerlock. He takes Rikjin down with a drop toe hold and then goes up to a horizontal headlock. Rikjin powers his way up and goes for a belly to back suplex, but Foshi lands on his feet. He drives Rikjin into the ropes and looks for a victory roll on the rebound, but Rikjin hooks himself and Foshi rolls back by himself. Massamoto comes at him with a clothesline which Foshi ducks followed by a leapfrog over Rikjin on the rebound. Rikjin comes at him once again off the ropes and Foshi looks for a hiptoss, but Rikjin flips through and lands on his feet. He looks for a clothesline while still having his arm hooked, but Foshi ducks and looks for a dragon suplex. Rikjin again lands on his feet as Foshi quickly kips up so as not to leave himself vulnerable. He looks for a kick to the head of Rikjin, but that's ducked. Just as quickly, Rikjin looks for a kick of his own which Foshi also ducks. Foshi goes for a clothesline which Rikjin evades and looks for another kick, which Foshi avoida via luchador flip. The two stare down to a nice applause from the crowd.

 

COLE

There was no doubt in anyone's mind that this would be a tremendously competitive match, but after seeing that, I'd say these two are about dead even with each other.

 

COACH

Anyone can do that kind of stuff. If Rikjin hadn't been the good guy before, he probably could've put this match away by now.

 

CABOOSE

I would absolutely love to see you in the ring with either one of these two.

 

COACH

I would love to see you fired.

 

CABOOSE

I would love to see you dead.

 

COLE

How about we call a match?

 

Foshi and Rikjin nod in respect at each other. They approach each other in the center once more. As Foshi goes for a grapple, Rikjin dodges Foshi's graps and goes behind in a waistlock. He lets go and hits a stiff kick to the back of Foshi's right knee. Foshi goes down as Rikjin comes off the ropes with a swinging neckbreaker.

 

CABOOSE

Very smart move by Rikjin. It's easiest to work over a man's leg, or any body part for that matter, when he's on the ground.

 

Rikjin goes off the ropes and comes back aiming for a kneedrop to the knee, but Foshi moves and rolls up Rikjin...

 

1....

 

2....

 

Rikjin kicks out. Foshi comes off the ropes with a dropkick. He quickly covers again.....

 

1...

 

2....

 

Rikjin kicks out again. Foshi drops an elbow, but Rikjin moves out of the way and goes for his own, but Foshi does the same. Both men recover. Foshi goes for a kick to the back of the head, but Rikjin catches his leg and gets him up in an electric chair. Foshi battles out of it and goes for a victory roll, but Rikjin blocks it and holds Foshi down for the pin ala Owen....

 

1....

 

2...

 

Foshi gets enough leg strength to finally roll through to the victory roll....

 

1....

 

2...

 

Rikjin kicks out. Both men get back to their feet. Rikjin dodges a clothesline and brings Foshi down in a neckbreaker. He goes off the ropes and hits a springboard moonsault for the cover...

 

1....

 

2...

 

Foshi kicks out. Rikjin climbs up top and comes off with a moonsault, but nobody's home. Foshi quickly rolls him up....

 

1....

 

2....

 

Rikjin gets the shoulder up. Foshi sets him up and hits a tornado ddt. He goes for a springboard moonsault of his own, but Rikjin anticipates it and gets the knees up. Foshi anticipates it, however, and lands past Rikjin on his feet. He drops a leg across the face and hooks Rikjin's already elevated legs...

 

1...

 

2...

 

Rikjin again kicks out. Foshi picks up Rikjin and hooks him from behind. He hits the dragon suplex, but this time it connects...

 

1...

 

Foshi flips through the original position into a bridge...

 

2....

 

Rikjin somehow gets a shoulder up. Foshi cannot believe it. Foshi waits on Rikjin to get up and then charges at him, but Rikjin drops down. Rikjin is up on the rebound and jumps up into a hurricanrana. He hooks Foshi's legs....

 

1...

 

2...

 

Foshi kicks out.

 

COLE

This is a match where you can't afford to make a mistake. Neither Foshi nor Rikjin is willing to let up even one inch and the slightest error or miscalculation should prove very costly.

 

Rikjin hits Foshi with a stiff chop to the chest. Foshi responds with a kick to the leg. Rikjin temporarily staggers, but recovers and hits another chop. Foshi hits another kick to the leg. Rikjin goes for another chop which Foshi avoids and dropkicks Rikjin in the back of the knee sending him down to the mat. Foshi wastes no time and quickly applies a figure 4 leglock.

 

CABOOSE

This could be key right here. Foshi has finally managed to slow down the match and shift it entirely in his favour.

 

COACH

Don't you mean favor?

 

CABOOSE

That's what I said.

 

Foshi locks it in tightly as Rikjin battles to break out, but it appears those few shots to the leg coupled with the fast paced action prior have weared down Rikjin somewhat. He drops to the mat.

 

1...

 

2...

 

Rikjin gets a shoulder up. Foshi locks it in tighter. Rikjin falls back slightly, but keeps his shoulders off the mat. He tries to take a shot at Foshi, but the distance between the two prevents any contact. Rikjin falls back down once more.

 

 

1...

 

2...

 

Rikjin gets the shoulder up again. Rikjin, realizing he cannot reach Foshi, decides instead to go after his legs. He begins taking shots at the legs of Foshi which are met with more tightening of the lock by Foshi. Rikjin, however, does not relent and continues to pound on the legs of Foshi. The hold begins to loosen. Foshi's leg bends just enough upward that a lot of the pressure is released from the hold and Rikjin uses this oppurtunity to reach over and hook Foshi's head into a small package...

 

1....

 

2...

 

But Foshi kicks out. As the two get back up, Foshi hits a kick to the knee of Rikjin knocking him back down. Foshi scoops Rikjin back up and sets him up for a brainbuster. He is about to get Rikjin up, but Rikjin blocks into a small package once again....

 

1...

 

2...

 

Foshi kicks out once more. They again get up and again Foshi takes advantage of Rikjin's weakened knee, sending him back down. He tries for the brainbuster once more and this time gets him all the way up. Rikjin, however, manages to shift his weight and grounds himself once again and reverses the hold into a Dragon's Breath inverted brainbuster. As he's about to hit it, it appears the bum knee is giving some trouble. Foshi shifts the weight once again and drops behind Rikjin rolling him up....

 

1....

 

Foshi lifts himself up and drops back into a bridge position to add more weight...

 

2....

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

DING DING DING

 

 

BUFER

Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner: FOOOOOOOSHIIII!

 

Foshi rolls out of the ring looking absolutely exhausted, as his music hits.

 

COLE

What a matchup. That could have gone either way up until the very end.

 

CABOOSE

Yes, but like you said before, it only took one mistake. Had Rikjin's knee not been hurting him, I do believe he would've hit the Dragon's Breath and we likely would've had a very different outcome. But, as it stands, he went for something he just wasn't able to execute.

 

COACH

And Foshi pulls one out again. You know, Massamoto can abuse Foshi about what he does all he wants, but he just got punked out.

 

COLE

I wouldn't say he got "punked out". But it remains that Rikjin has yet to defeat Foshi.

 

Rikjin sits in the middle of the ring looking extremely disappointed with himself. The ref checks on his knee, but Rikjin shoves him off. Foshi quickly glances at Rikjin and then makes his way to the back. Rikjin eventually follows suit and rolls out of the ring, making his way back to the lockerroom area favoring his knee.

 

 

*****************************

The camera cuts to the backstage area where “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican and Vitamin X are talking. The crowd boos the moment they are shown. Vitamin X has a towel around his neck, and is drinking from a water bottle. PRL is wearing his warmup attire of a Puerto Rican flag bandana, a gold chain around his neck, black sweatshirt, blue elbowpads, Puerto Rican flag wristbands, black sweatpants, and his red boots with the Puerto Rican flag airbrushed over them. He is also carrying his custom made spinner 24/7 Championship belt over his left shoulder.

 

“THE CORPORATE CHAMPION” THA PUERTO RICAN

That was a great job you did out there tonight, X. I’m very proud of you and Cuban Wall. Brains & Brawn are going to be a great team! They’re going to bring the World Tag Team Titles to The Lightning Crew!

 

VITAMIN X

Thanks P. But the night is not over yet! We still got the Lethal Rumble! And you know what? I’m feeling lucky tonight. I feel that tonight, things are going to start getting better. My rise to the top of the OAOAST as a singles superstar will soon be complete. It all started at License To Pin last July when I pinned Leroy Andrew Parka, and it will end at AngleMania V when I become the NEW One And Only AngleSault Thread World Heavyweight Champion!

 

PRL is a little annoyed with Vitamin X’s comments. The crowd, as usual, boos.

 

PUERTO RICAN

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Don’t get too carry away herre. Now, you’re a singles superstar. That’s all well and good. BUT! You’re STILL a member of The Lightning Crew! And since you’re a LC member first, and a wrestler second, then you must follow the leader of The Lightning Crew’s orders. And the leader of The Lightning Crew says that in the Lethal Rumble, your number one objective is to make sure that Tha Puerto Rican wins the match! No ifs, ands, or buts, your only job in this match is to make sure that I do NOT get eliminated! You understand?

 

VITAMIN X (nodding)

Yes sir.

 

THA PUERTO RICAN

Good. That’s good. Nothing personal. It’s just that I’ve been working hard for THREE YEARS to become OAOAST World Champion, and I will NOT, AND THA PUERTO RICAN MEANS WILL NOT lose the Lethal Rumble Match three years in a row!

 

VX

Absolutely, boss.

 

PRL

All right. But don’t be disappointed. If I win the Lethal Rumble tonight, and go on to become World Heavyweight Champion at AngleMania, then next year, in the 2007 Lethal Rumble, I give you permission to go all out and try to win the damn thing! How’s that sound?

 

VX (trying to sound enthusiastic)

That sounds good. I’m okay with that.

 

PRL

Ooooooookay! (PRL dusts his right shoulder off) So, did you get your number yet?

 

Vitamin X pulls out the ball with his Lethal Rumble entry number on it.

 

VITAMIN X

Yup. I got it right here.

 

Vitamin X plays with his ball.

 

PRL

All right. I’m gonna go get my number now. I’ll catch you later.

 

VX

All right. Later.

 

PRL and X pound fists. Tha Puerto Rican walks down the hallway, still holding his spinner 24/7 Championship belt over his left shoulder. PRL heads to a door with a piece of paper on it that says LETHAL RUMBLE NUMBER DRAWING ROOM. He opens the door and enters, and sees that Colombian Heat has already drawn his number. Heat must have drawn a good number since he has a smile on his face.

 

COLOMBIAN HEAT

A’ight. I like dis number. I like dis number a lot.

 

Colombian Heat is about to leave the room, but then he notices PRL standing a few feet away from him. Heat walks right up to PRL, and the two men who will face off for the 24/7 Title later on tonight engage in a staredown with each other. Neither man says a word. They just continue staring at each other in disgust. The crowd waits for PRL and Heat to come to blows, but that doesn’t happen. Instead, Colombian Heat simply walks away. PRL sneers at him as he leaves.

 

THA PUERTO RICAN

I’ll see you later.

 

PRL turns his attention to drawing his number for the Lethal Rumble Match.

 

PRL

All right! Here we go! Time to see what number I get in the Rumble! Axel, how are ya?

 

AXEL

I’m good.

 

PRL

All right. Let’s do this!

 

PRL turns the handle on the number drawing machine, whistling a tune while doing it. He stops turning the handle, and then spits in his hands and rubs them together. He reaches into the number drawing machine and pulls out a ball. He opens up the ball and pulls out a small piece of paper. PRL crosses his fingers.

 

PRL

Please let this be a good number. Please let this be a good number.

 

PRL opens up the piece of paper. He is pleased at the number he drew.

 

PUERTO

Heh. Heh. Alllllllllriiiiiiiiiiiiight! I’ve got it in the bag. I am going to win the Lethal Rumble! HA! HA! HA! HA!

 

As PRL looks at his number, the camera pans left to PRL, revealing that THE MAD CAPPA is standing right next to him! The crowd cheers. PRL looks at Cappa, then looks at his number, then does a double take, and takes a step back, letting out a girlish scream.

 

PRL

AAH! MAD CAPPA!? What the hell are you doing here?

 

THE MAD CAPPA

I’m in the Lethal Rumble. Duh.

 

PUERTO RICAN

Wait. How could YOU be in the Lethal Rumble? You haven’t been on TV since September! Whereas I have been defending the PRESTIGIOUS 24/7 Title since BEFORE September!

 

MAD CAPPA

Axel wanted actual TALENT in the Lethal Rumble Match. Not just guys who get by base on charisma and little else.

 

The crowd pops for Cappa’s remark.

 

PRL

Oh, good one. Well, Cappa, old buddy, old pal. Don’t get your hopes up. Because tonight at Anglepalooza, Tha Puerto Rican will once again prove he is better than The Mad Cappa when I throw you over the top rope and win the Lethal Rumble Match! Remember, I’ve beaten you in the past, and tonight, I’ll do it again!

 

CAPPA

Oh, how I've missed your high-pitched voice! I just couldn't wait to hear you talk in a voice so high, it makes me wonder if you're really a man!

 

PRL

You know, there are plenty of guys out there that have high pitched voices. Mike Tyson, Micheal Jackson, King Adrock, Mike D, that guy that does the voice of Homer Simpson.

 

CAPPA

Shut up.

 

PRL

Make me!

 

CAPPA

I'll do it later in the Lethal Rumble. Remember, P.R., that I’ve beaten YOU in the past too! More than once, infact! Remember AngleMania III?

 

PRL

DO NOT TALK ABOUT ANGLEMANIA THREE!!!

 

Cappa looks at PRL with a quizzical look on his face.

 

PRL

Good luck getting a better number than me. Look at my number!

 

PRL puts his piece of paper in Cappa’s face.

 

PRL

I bet you’ll end up with number 1!

 

CAPPA

Maybe I will. Maybe I won’t.

 

PRL

You won’t.

 

CAPPA

Nevermind! I’m going to go and get my number right now.

 

PRL

Yeah you do that.

 

CAPPA

I will.

 

PRL

Yeah.

 

CAPPA

I will.

 

PRL

Yeah.

 

CAPPA

I will.

 

Cappa walks over to the number drawing machine, not taking his eyes off of PRL. Cappa turns the handle on the number drawing machine, PRL standing next to him. Cappa stops turning the handle, and reaches into the machine, pulling out another ball. TMC opens the ball, and takes out the small piece of paper inside of it. Cappa opens up the piece of paper and finds out his entry number in the Lethal Rumble Match. He smiles.

 

THE MAD CAPPA

Check this out!

 

Cappa puts his piece of paper in PRL’s face. PRL’s smile fades.

 

PUERTO RICAN

AW, DAMNIT!

 

CAPPA

Looks like I’ve beaten you again!

 

PRL

DAMN YOU, CAPPA!

 

CAPPA

EAT ME, P.R.!

 

Cappa leaves the number drawing room with a sly smile on his face, playing with his ball. PRL watches Cappa leave, pissed off.

 

THA PUERTO RICAN

I HATE that guy! I always have and I always will.

 

*Fade Back to Ring*

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COLE

The following match has basically been deemed so damn dangerous that Michael Buffer won't be at ringside doing introductions and I'm the only one who took the OAOAST up on their offer of bonus money and protective gear in order for calling this match to be worth it. Brodie Lewis is set to do battle with Julie "The Shark" Sharcor. Let's hear some pre-recorded comments from Brodie from earlier today.

 

(Cut to shot of Brodie, in a leather jacket and jeans, sitting behind a generic studio backdrop, on a stool)

 

BRODIE

(looks down at ground with the side of her fist covering her chin) Well, I could sit here and whine about how I didn't get the title shot that I was going so crazy over. I could sit here and bitch about how the OAOAST management are out to get me. I COULD do a lot of things. But, I'm not. I'm not going to act as if facing "The Shark" is some sort of punishment. Some people might see it that way; I was even told that some people in some high positions within the promotion threw Julie some big money to sign that paper. But, the fact is, Julie Sharcor is a human being. Every human being has imperfections. Not one human being is indestructable; not one human being is immortal. Julie, you're big. You're strong. You're good at beating people up. (looks up at camera) The thing is...I'm better at beating people up. It's what I've done all my life; it's all I've done all my life. You had to be trained in order to be a fighter; I was BORN one. You can hit me with all of your Muay Thai strikes and throw me around like in judo. But remember this: every time you punch me, I'll get back up and headbutt you. Every time you kick me, I'll get right back up and try and pull your damn eye out! Every time you try to make me tap out, I'll get right back up and try to end your (bleep)in' life! Jenny...you can win fights. You can win battles. But, tonight...CAN YOU WIN A WAR?!?!

 

(Brodie walks off the set)

 

("Hall of Mirrors" starts up, and Brodie Lewis comes out in a Bouncing Souls t-shirt, jeans, and black combat boots, looking ready for war. She storms right into the ring, wasting no time for show.)

 

COLE

The set-up for this is simple: Brodie went nuts, causing chaos wherever the OAOAST travelled across the country for a few weeks, begging for a shot at the World Women's Title, which she wasn't worthy of due to inactivity and lack of wins. The Board of Directors got utterly sick of this and did what any geniuses do with their problems: stick them on someone else. They figured that if they could get Brodie Lewis focused on another wrestler that she could both work her way up the ladder for a title shot like she wants AND she'd be out of their hair. They put up an open contract for anyone in the locker room to fight her tonight...and Julie Sharcor answered.

 

Julie Sharcor storms out to the ring with a towel over her head. She too storms down to the ring, not waiting for anything, and tosses the towel off of her head before quickly climbing into the ring. The two combatants come together in mid-ring and start engaging in an INTENSE staredown. Both are completely silent, as the referee tries explaining the rules to the two wrestlers and getting them seperated. He can't tell either to move, so he starts trying to physically move them. This pisses them off, causing Brodie to punch the referee right in between the eyes and shove her out of the ring!

 

COLE

HERE WE GO!

 

::bell rings::

 

Sharcor comes up behind Brodie, spins her around, and connects with a sickening headbutt right above the nose! It dazes Brodie for not even a second, as she comes back with a STIFF headbutt of her own!

 

COLE

GEEZ! You can hear the THUDDING sounds of those!

 

Sharcor's not even dazed, immediately responding with another stiff headbutt! Brodie comes back via instinct with another of her own! Sharcor brings a headbutt, then Brodie! There's noticable bruising around Brodie's left eye, as she comes back with another stiff headbutt! Both are barely effected by the pain, as they grab the back of each other's heads and go nuts with a rapid-fire battle of ridiculously stiff headbutts! The crowd's reaction gets louder as the speed and the stiffness of the headbutts picks up!

 

COLE

That ain't right!

 

The headbutts continue, as a trickle of blood starts down Julie's face. Finally, Brodie's headbutts become so fierce and quick that she's able to hit a series of six in a row, uninterrupted, causing Sharcor to let go of Brodie's head and stumble backwards ever-so-slightly!

 

COLE

Whoa!

 

Brodie charges at "The Shark" and punches her right on the jaw, sending her back rocking on the ropes! The crowd's getting loud! Brodie leaps at Sharcor and starts throwing repeated punches to the back of her head! Brodie connects with a bevy of them, but Julie's so damn strong that she's able to simply swat Lewis away with one arm! Brodie flies backwards and takes a fall, but rolls right back to her feet. Brodie charges right back at Sharcor, but Sharcor side-steps and Brodie tumbles through the ropes. Somehow, Brodie is able to hold onto the middle rope with both hands to avoid the fall, and pulls herself back in. Sharcor's got her back turned, trying to rub a trickle of blood from the headbutts out of her eye, leaving the opportunity for Brodie to leap onto Julie's back and go crazy with rabbit punches to the back of the head!

 

COLE

They're not letting us down so far!

 

Brodie keeps at it, with her forearm hooked around Julie's throat to keep hanging on. Sharcor finally tires of the punishment and moves backwards as fast as she can, sandwiching Lewis between her weight and the corner! Sharcor walks forward to shrug off the punishment she's gone through so far, but Brodie leaps onto her back again and goes nuts with the punches to the back of the head!

 

COLE

STIFF!

 

Sharcor ends up reaching up to grab the back of Brodie's head, and tries to snapmare her over. But, Brodie hangs on somehow. So, Sharcor gets her off with a judo throw variation of the snapmare she was attempting! Brodie tries to immediately get up, being showered with a bevy of kicks to the chest and back by Sharcor. Brodie gets up to a squatted position and is able to actually catch one of her kicks, then flings Julie around by the leg, causing her to stumble on one foot right into the ropes! Brodie gets up, as Sharcor holds onto the top rope to pull herself from falling to the floor...but Lewis charges forward like a bull with a headbutt to Julie's chest, and sends her to the floor!

 

COLE

The Shark's down! The Shark's down!

 

Sharcor falls hard to the floor, but gets right back up immediately. Brodie climbs up to the top rope, looking to go out of her element and take to the air to keep Julie down. Brodie takes off, but Sharcor side-steps it and Brodie flies face-first into the top edge of the guardrail!

 

COLE

DAMN!

 

Lewis falls down to the ground in a heap, as it's definately obvious that her forehead is busted wide open. Sharcor pulls Brodie up before Lewis can stand up on her own power. "The Shark" lifts Brodie and drives her back-first onto the edge of the apron with a powerbomb! Brodie falls to the floor, screaming in pain as she holds her back. Sharcor deadlifts Brodie off of the ground and tries to toss her back into the ring, but Brodie fights Julie off with all of her might throwing wild punches and kicks in every direction possible. Julie lets go of Brodie, who falls to the ground and comes up to swing a punch. But, Brodie ducks under the punch, hooks Brodie, and gives her a HYOOOOGE Exploder suplex over the guardrail and into a set of chairs vacated by frightened fans!

 

COLE

That woman is a BEAST!

 

Even after that huge blow, Brodie still is trying to get herself up as quick as she lands. Lewis is wearing the crimson mask, as she grabs a chair that she flattened on the way down. Julie reaches over the guardrail and grabs Brodie, who's sitting down with her back to the guardrail. Brodie swings the chair backwards and wraps the damn thing around Julie's head! Sharcor stumbles back a couple of steps, as her eyes briefly rolled to the back of her head. Brodie pulls herself up with the guardrail and pulls Sharcor in by the legs of the chair, still around her neck. Lewis delivers a HARD headbutt to the forehead of Sharcor, leaving a blood stain on her face. Julie stumbles back a step, but comes right back with a hard forearm to the face that sends Brodie down!

 

COLE

These two are not stopping at anything!

 

Sharcor climbs over the guardrail and pulls Lewis to her feet. Julie lifts Brodie up for a vertical suplex, walks over to the guardrail, and drops her chest-first on the other side of the railing! "The Shark" climbs over the rail and back to the other side. Lewis tries pulling herself up, using Sharcor, but gets punted in the ribs for her effort. Sharcor finally yanks the nearly-broken chair off of her neck and tosses it away, where it ends up in the ring. Sharcor pulls the still-struggling Brodie up and rolls her into the ring. Julie takes a moment to re-adjust her left kickpad, as Brodie is pulling herself up with the ropes. Sharcor climbs up to the apron, as a bloody Lewis is back up to her feet. Out of instinct, Brodie grabs the previously-used chair and hurls it at Julie! It bounces off of Sharcor's head, causing her to fall to the floor!

 

COLE

Gravity + flying steel = a downed Shark.

 

Lewis stumbles around in the ring for a second, as one of the floor cameramen gets a good shot of Julie's face as she climbs to her feet, with blood trickling from above her right eyebrow. Lewis gets out to the apron, as Sharcor stands up. Brodie runs down the apron, and hits a vicious Cactus-style cannonball dive to Sharcor...but Sharcor CATCHES HER! The crowd goes nuts at Sharcor's crazy strength, as Julie has her hooked like a powerbomb and hurls her sideways, sending her gut-first into the ringpost!

 

COLE

MY LORD!

 

Lewis crashes to the floor, with her body making a sickening "thud" noise upon impact. Julie pulls Brodie to her feet and lifts Lewis onto her shoulders. Julie tries to put Brodie back into the ring, but Lewis grabs onto the ropes and pushes away as hard as she can. Brodie starts losing strength, so she goes right to Brodie's right eye, using her fingers to dig into the cut and her thumb to dig into "The Shark"'s eye. The pain gets to be too much, as Sharcor lets go and drops Lewis down to her feet. Brodie temporarily drops to her knees, as she's been weakened plenty by the blood loss and the punishment overall so far, but gets right back up and lets loose with a bevy of punches with both hands, to Sharcor's mid-section.

 

COLE

Brodie Lewis will not back down!

 

Brodie then NAILS Sharcor in the gut with a stiff forward kick. Lewis backs up a few steps, then charges forward and tackles Sharcor, causing both to fly over the guardrail and back into the crowd! Both wrestlers pull themselves up, as the referee finally is up and climbs over the guardrail after the two. Brodie picks up a chair, as the referee warns her about using the chair. So, Brodie cracks the referee on the skull with the chair, knocking him out and busting HIM open too!

 

COLE

You just don't run in front of a freight train!

 

Brodie then swings the chair at Sharcor, but Sharcor throws a forearm into the chair that knocks it back into Brodie's face! Brodie goes down to one knee, as Sharcor delivers a stiff kick to the side of Brodie's head! But, Brodie just stays there, looking like the kick pissed her off! Brodie gets up and connects with a stiff right cross to Julie's jaw! Sharcor takes a step back, then charges right back with a forearm to the face! Brodie with a punch! Sharcor with a forearm! Back and forth! Back and forth! They move further into the crowd! This fight gets so wild that they start trampling fans as they move! One fan tries taking a picture of the chaos and gets in Sharcor's way, causing her to grab the camera and shove him down, then break the camera over Brodie's head!

 

COLE

Dear God, this is out of control!

 

Brodie picks up a random chair and hits Sharcor in the face with it without even shutting it! Blood starts to come out of Sharcor's nose, but it does not faze her, as she comes right back with a forearm shot to the face! The punch/forearm trade-off continues, as this brawl goes too far deep into the crowd for the camera to continue to follow!

 

(Cut back to Sofa Central

 

COLE

Well, it looks like we've lost this one. I somehow think this has ended up as a no-contest, after they knocked out the referee and all. I'm being told in my headset that we're going to apparantly go to our next segment here. We just need to get Coachman & Caboose back out here.

 

***************************

 

*Cut back to HeldDOWN GM~! Axel in the drawing room, standing behind the tumbler.*

 

AXEL

OK, who we got, who we got...

 

Axel suddenly stops clapping as Alfdogg walks in on the left side, and Brock Ausstin and Rick Heyross walk in on the right side. The two have a staredown, as extra security walks into the room.

 

AXEL

Alf, if you would, go ahead and draw your number.

 

ALF

No no...we'll do the standard procedure. The champ (slaps his belt on his shoulder with his hand) goes last...we'll let the CHUMP go first.

 

Brock starts to lunge at Alf, but is quickly held back by security. Axel takes a step back, as well, as Alf just smiles at Brock.

 

AXEL

Very well...Brock, please.

 

Brock pulls a plastic container out.

 

BROCK

I think I just pulled YOUR chump card.

 

Brock, never changing his expression, opens the container and looks at his number. He then looks back up at Alf, trying his best to keep a good poker face, but can't resist cracking a sly grin before he and his manager walk off. Alf then reaches into the bin and pulls a container out, and looks at the number, cracking a smile of his own.

 

ALF

Yeah...we'll see who the punk is tonight.

 

Alf starts to walk off, but stops and turns to Axel.

 

ALF

Speaking of which...you can't spell PUNK with PK. You tell your boy to be ready for AngleMania.

 

Alf leaves the room as Axel looks on in disgust.

 

***********************

 

COACH

We're back.

 

CABOOSE

That we are. Magic of television.

 

COLE

We're used to personal issues here at the OAOAST and let's face it, it's what the business was built on. Personal grudges fuel the OAOAST. But, sometimes people go too far and you could certainly say that about Crystal and her recent actions. For months, the Women's Division was plagued by a mystery Benefactor who placed bounties on the heads of Jenny Adams and Ashley Street, seemingly for no reason. Eventually The Benefactor was unmasked as Crystal last month and since then, Crystal's reasoning has been pretty dubious.

 

COACH

Your opinion.

 

COLE

Jenny Adams was put on the injured list and cost the OAOAST Women's Championship as a result of Crystal's bounty and understandably, she has the most revenge to seek. But, it's not that simple for Jenny. She saw Crystal as an idol and says that it was Crystal that inspired her to become a wrestler in the first place. Mixed feelings can't begin to describe how Jenny Adams must feel tonight, facing Crystal.

 

CABOOSE

Well, it's time for her to grow up. Crystal isn't what Jenny thought she was, now she needs to get over it and do something about it. This isn't MySpace and we've got no room for emo kids.

 

COACH

Harsh!

 

Suddenly, "Fly" by Loudmouth kicks in and the crowd pop for Jenny Adams! The former Women's Champion and sentimental favourite doesn't react to the fans, keeping her head solemnly down as she walks sadly out towards the ring. She doesn't want to be here and it clearly shows.

 

BUFFER

Ladies and gentlemen, the following Grudge Match is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, hailing from Toledo, Ohio! She weighs in at one hundred and nineteen pounds... JJEEEENNYYYYYY AAA...

 

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

COLE

WAIT A MINUTE!! IT'S CRYSTAL!!

 

Michael Buffer stops his introduction abruptly as he, along with the rest of the crowd, spot Jenny Adams being knocked to the ground by a blindsight attack from Crystal! The former OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion pounces on Jenny and mounts her in the aisle, pounding her with wild right hands! The fans are raving at Crystal, as she grabs Jenny's hair and starts slamming her head back against the floor! Crystal finally stands up and yells at the crowd beside her, while Jenny tries to recover her bearings.

 

COLE

This is ridiculous! Crystal didn't even let Jenny make her entrance before sneak attacking her in the aisle! If she's so unimpressed by the quality of the Women's Division, why does she need to use these sort of tactics!?!

 

COACH

She doesn't NEED to Mikey, she just enjoys it more this way!

 

The referee has left the ring now to try and convince Crystal to go to the ring. Crystal simply ignores that request though, grabbing Jenny as she gets back to her feet and throwing her sideways into the steel barricade! Jenny slumps forward holding her shoulder, as Crystal just smirks cockily. Grabbing Jenny once more, Crystal now drags Jenny down towards the ring, taking a detour at the end of the ramp and slamming Jenny's head into the steel steps! Already Crystal is dominant, taking Jenny into the steps again before pausing to chastise the referee. Once that's dealt with, Crystal then throws Jenny into the ring and dusts off her hands.

 

*DINGDINGDING!*

 

COLE

Well, finally this match is in the ring. But, poor Jenny Adams already looks half-beat after this callous attack!

 

Entering the ring, Crystal drags a groggy Adams away from the ropes and stands over her. And with a smug grin, Crystal then places her foot across Jenny's gut and executes a double bicep pose that doesn't exactly rival Tony Brannigan but kinda resmebles him, if you squint...a lot.

 

 

1...

 

 

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

Kickout!

 

COLE

Ridiculous cover! What the hell does Crystal expect to achieve pulling something like that?

 

CABOOSE

Humiliation, perhaps?

 

Crystal grins at the kickout. Pulling Jenny up, Crystal lands a quick forearm strike to the face...and a second, before doing a quick Ali shuffle and putting Jenny down with a hard right hand. Jenny already looks in danger as Crystal is just able to pick her spots, casually stomping away on the fallen former Women's Champion as boos continue to sound out through the arena.

 

COACH

Look at this. MAH BABY GURL is right, this is no competition for a former World Champion!

 

Picking up Jenny again, Crystal sends her opponent into the corner with an irish whip. Crystal then takes a moment to fix her hair and another moment to adjust her boots. Infact, all the moments Crystal is taking are really adding up, taking a ridiculous amount of time before charging in...and still landing her clothesline in the corner. Jenny collapses down against the bottom turnbuckle, Crystal standing over her and paying blatantly no attention as she jaws with the fans.

 

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

 

COACH

What's wrong with these disrespectful idiots?

 

COLE

They're no more disrespectful than Crystal is being towards Jenny Adams! Infact, this is almost embarrasing to watch. Who the hell does Crystal think she is!?! She's acting like a complete prima-donna and it's sickening!

 

Crystal gives Jenny and sneakily little kick in the face as she backs away from her opponent, lining her up and running in with a hard knee to the side of the head! Eyes rolling into the back of her head, Jenny slumps half in/half out of the ring. Crystal drags her full in though, making another lackadaisical cover...

 

 

1...

 

 

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

 

 

Shoulder up!

 

This time, Crystal looks a little unhappy at the kickout. But she doesn't let it bother her for too long, standing back up and cockily scraping the base of her boot across Jenny's face!

 

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

 

Ignoring the chants, Crystal captures Jenny's arms and takes her over with a textbook Butterly Suplex. Crystal hangs onto the butterfly and rolls Jenny back up, looking for a second. Jenny is deadweight, but Crystal perserveres and gets Jenny up for the second Butterfly Suplex. Rather than go for a third though Crystal rolls Jenny onto her back and turns away from her as she gets to her feet. Mugging for the crowd, Crystal then sets...and executes a standing moonsault, crushing Jenny and sitting up where she again taunts the fans.

 

COLE

Jenny Adams hasn't had a chance to mount any offence what-so-ever in this one. But if Crystal doesn't start concentrating on the match, that might very well change pretty soon.

 

COACH

Baloney!

 

COLE

You don't agree with me?

 

COACH

Huh? Sorry, I wasn't really listening. This is such a squash, I decided to grab by packed lunch and see what sandwich I'd made for myself tonight.

 

Crystal pulls Jenny to her feet again. In no position to fight back, Jenny is simply target practice for Crystal, who rears back...

 

*SLAP!*

 

"WHOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

...and lands a knifedge chop.

 

 

*SLAP!*

 

"WHOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

...a second.

 

 

*SLAP!*

 

"WHOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

...and a third. Crystal then piefaces Jenny to the mat, glaring down at her in disgust and SPITTING on the former Women's Champion!!

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

CRYSTAL

YOU ARE NOTHING!! HEAR ME JENNY? NOTHING!

 

Crystal bends down and SLAPS Jenny in the face, to another chorus of boos from the crowd. But it also gets a reaction from Jenny, finally beginning to realise she has to fight, shaking with rage as she begins to push hersef back up.

 

CRYSTAL

YOU'RE A DISGRACE TO MY NAME!!

 

A slap across the back of Jenny's head seems to have no effect as she continues to climb to her feet.

 

CRYSTAL

YOU'RE A DISGRACE TO WOMEN'S WRESTLING!!

 

Jenny is now up and Crystal fires off another insulting slap...NO! Jenny blocks it and lands a forearm! Another! And a third!

 

"YYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

COLE

YES! Jenny is rallying back, finally! She's taken more than enough crap from Crystal and now she's fighting back!!

 

Shocked by the sudden attack, Crystal is backed across the ring as Jenny continues to throw forearm after forearm in a fit of rage! Crystal eventually manages to reach out and jab her fingers into Jenny's eyes! The referee warns Crystal, but she just brushes him away. Grabbing an arm, Crystal levers Jenny into the ropes and sends her across the ring with an irish whip. But Jenny ducks under a clothesline and tackles Crystal to the ground, mounting the former World Champion and landing some more forearm shots to rock Crystal! Crystal takes a good series of shots, before reaching up and pushing Jenny off of her. Scrambling to her feet, Crystal seems lost. Eventually, she turns around and stumbles into an armdrag from Adams! Another armdrag! And a third, this time a Japanese Armdrag! And Jenny is running through Crystal with BABYFACE FIRE~! Crystal staggers up dis-orientated and Jenny knocks her up into the air and back a couple of feet with a lucha shoulder pop, then hits the ropes and knocks Crystal off her feet with a running dropkick! And all of sudden, Crystal is reeling and is crawling for the safety of the outside.

 

COLE

And that's what you get for underestimating Jenny Adams, missy!

 

CABOOSE

Did you just call a former World Heavyweight Champion and, might I add, a woman so much more dangerous than yourself, missy? If you've got that much of a deathwish, all you had to do was tell me and I'd have brought my bat with me tonight.

 

Crystal reaches the floor and tries to get her head together. Brushing some imaginary dirt of of herself, the confidence begins to come back to Crystal as she calms herself down, breathing deeply and rythmically as she turns around, ready to make Jenny pay...

 

 

 

 

...and gets WIPED OUT with a Corkscrew Plancha!!!!

 

"YYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

COLE

INCREDIBLE!!

 

"JE - NNY!"

"JE - NNY!"

"JE - NNY!"

"JE - NNY!"

 

COLE

How about that guys? Have you ever seen Crystal do something like that, because I sure haven't!

 

COACH

She doesn't need to do dumb moves like that. She's a serious wrestler, not some Mexican flipfest chick.

 

COLE

She's from Ohio.

 

COACH

Close enough.

 

With handfuls of hair, Jenny takes Crystal headfirst into the ring apron and then bundles her opponent back inside. Jenny then climbs to the apron, then up to the top rope, waiting perched on the top for Crystal to get up. Slowly she begins to do so, turning around to find Jenny soaring off the top with a crossbody...and taking a quick step back, before guiding Jenny down across her knee in a modified Gutbuster!!

 

"OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

COACH

HAHA! Go back to Mexico!

 

COLE

?????

 

Jenny writhes holding her gut as Crystal shakes away some cobwebs before reaching down, grabbing Jenny's hair with a growl. It seems Crystal has been pissed off now, as she hurls Jenny face-first into a turnbuckle. Crystal turns Jenny to face her and applies a blantant choke, climbing to the middle rope to apply more leverage on trying to crush poor Jenny's windpipe.

 

"ONE!"

"TWO!"

"THREE!"

"FOUR!"

"FI..."

 

Releasing the choke, Crystal ignores the protests of the referee as she now drags Jenny down to knee level and places her across the middle rope, draping her knee across the back with another choke!

 

"ONE!"

"TWO!"

"THREE!"

"FOUR!"

"FI..."

 

Crystal breaks on five.

 

COLE

I think Crystal's flustered here! She's pulling out all of the stops all of a sudden. The cocky smile is gone and she almost looks desperate...

 

COACH

Hey! Believe me, Crystal is far from desperate!

 

COLE

I think Jenny's got her frightened. That offensive flurry has got Crystal thinking just how embarrassing it would be if she lost tonight after all the talk and all the disrespect Crystal has aimed at the Women's Division.

 

Taking Jenny up with a scoop, Crystal looks ready to slam Jenny routinely. But instead of a mere scoop slam, Crystal decides to turn and drop Jenny throat first across the top rope to further leave her gasping for breath! Jenny is left coughing and spluttering as she snaps away from the ropes, Crystal able to relax a touch more. She doesn't calm down though, as she kicks away Jenny's arms and STANDS on her throat with her hands on the top rope for balance!

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

"ONE!"

"TWO!"

"THREE!"

"FOUR!"

"FIV..."

 

Crystal again uses the count to it's fullest before freeing Jenny's airways.

 

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

 

COACH

These people are wrong...dead wrong...although, I'd be happy to help prove them right.

 

COLE

COACH! Get your mind out of the gutter, please!

 

Still ignoring the continuing chastising from the referee, Crystal backs Jenny into a corner and puts everything into a right hand to the jaw! Another right hand connects! Jenny is feeling the shots, but at the same time she's feeling something else. She's feeling the respect she had for Crystal vanish. Crystal cocks her fist back for another right hand, but a forearm intercepts her and sends her staggering back a few steps. Hopping to the middle rope, Jenny wraps her legs around Crystal's head and pushes off with a spinning Hurricanrana that sends Crystal soaring across the ring!

 

"YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

 

COLE

Jenny's got a lot of heart and she's damn sure not giving up here!

 

Both women pull themselves back up and Jenny is first to strike, landing a forearm. Crystal is dazed and tries to retaliate, but is beaten to the punch by Jenny, who has the adrenaline throwing and lands a quick series of forearms! Jenny then turns her back to Crystal and comes roaring with an elbow...DUCKED! Having missed, Jenny does another 180 to meet Crystal. But as she turns, Crystal tackles her to the floor and is so frustrated at Jenny's attempts to mess up her face, she simply mounts Adams and clasps her hands around her throat!

 

COLE

Crystal has lost it!

 

"COME ON CRYSTAL, THAT'S ENOUGH!"

"ONE!"

"TWO!"

"THREE!"

"FOUR!"

"FIVE!"

 

...

 

 

Crystal isn't breaking. The referee has no other choice.

 

*DINGDINGDING!*

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

BUFFER

Ladies and gentlemen, the referee has stopped this match and, as a result of a disqualification, your winners of the match... is JENNY ADAMS!

 

The match is over and still the choke goes on. But Michael Cole isn't right. Crystal hasn't 'lost it'...she just doesn't care about the match anymore. And she's given up on proving a point she feels she doesn't need to make and instead is proving the point in a different, more effective way. Finally Crystal gives up the choke, a wryish smile on her face.

 

COLE

Crystal just cost herself the match!

 

COACH

So what? She's proven her point, the result don't matter.

 

Crystal stands over Jenny and the referee is relieved to finally have control.

 

 

Little does he know that Crystal isn't done. Reaching down, Crystal quickly hooks up the defenceless Jenny Adams' legs and crosses them over, turning the one hundred nineteen pound female onto her front and locking in THE CRYSTALLING!!!

 

*DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!*

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

COLE

WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!?! LET HER GO DAMNIT!!

 

COACH

HAHA! There's your point proven Mikey Cole! No competition!

 

As Jenny screams in again, Crystal takes immense pleasure in leaning back with the Crystalling. The referee is frantically trying to convince Crystal to let Jenny go and the crowd are screaming at Crystal to do the same amongst the boos. But none of it works, so the referee is left to call for some reinforcements again.

 

*DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!*

 

COLE

THIS IS RIDICULOUS!!

 

COACH

This is GREAT!!

 

Jenny is being bent in half, nobody able to free her until FINALLY, Crystal releases the hold and throws Jenny down, looking at the girl who idolised her with destain...and smiling, from ear to ear. "Plug In Baby" by Muse hits again as Crystal is thankfully directed from the ring before more harm can be done. Still smiling, Crystal cockily strides back up the ramp as the referee tends to Jenny.

 

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

"CRYS - TAL SUCKS!"

 

COLE

This is ridiculous! Crystal has left poor Jenny Adams laying in the centre of the ring, injured and humiliated. We barely even got a proper match going at the start...I mean, who the hell does Crystal think she is? What a bit...

 

COACH

Heyheyhey!

 

COLE

Well it's true. Crystal showed a total lack of respect tonight. She attacked Jenny before the match, she showed her complete disrespect, she tried to humiliate Jenny, she got disqualified for choking Jenny repeatedly and unrelentingly and then, to top it all off, she applies The Crystalling after the match. We've seen the damage that move has done to male wrestlers before. I hate to sound sexist by that remark, but Jenny Adams is only one hundred and nineteen pounds. That move could have snapped the poor girl in half.

 

CABOOSE

'Poor girl'? Now who's being disrespectful? She's an athlete and she should be able to take that sort of thing if she's an athlete. She held her own against Brodie Lewis before, so there's no reason why she couldn't do the same against Crystal, except she's messed up in the head about this whole issue. That's not Crystal's fault.

 

COLE

OF COURSE IT'S CRYSTAL'S FAULT!!

 

CABOOSE

Phff, whatever. She needs to get her head straight, that's all.

Edited by King Cucaracha

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COLE

Well ladies and gents, its time for one of our feature matches of the evening, and one that our esteemed GM would be watching very closely. The tag titles are on the line, as the New, New Midnight Express face off with the champs, the dream team, Zack Malibu and Leon Rodez, the Usual Suspects. Lets send you down to ringside.

 

apfilmtagtitle8cx.gif

 

"Chase" hits and the boo birds are in full force as the daperly attired James E. Cornette leads Sarcastic Simon and Narcissistic Ned, the New New Midnight Express, to the ring for this championship match. Fans pelting their least favorite wrestler(s) with garabge isn't a rarity, but throwing a t-shirt at them is. Ned turns a C.O.D. t-shirt into a makeshift hankerchief, blowing his nose and tossing it back into the crowd.

 

COLE

Blanchard letting the fans know what he thinks about C.O.D. in a very unsanitary matter. I bet Krista is watching this match with great interest.

 

COLE

Oh, I'm sure she is. She's probably already thinking of ways to get Ned to take her back. Well, toots, it ain't gonna happen. You blew your shot at the Ned Man. But you know what they say, fellas. Desperate people do desperate things. I wouldn't be surprised if she shows up out of the blue with another baby claiming its Ned's.

 

The fans jump out of their seats as Weezer's "Beverly Hills" begins blaring over the loud speakers, signaling the arrive of the World Tag Team Champions. And with the belts come all the nice perks of being champion -- money, women, and LOUD PYRO! Leon Rodez is still his fun-loving self, mingling with the fans, but the usually calm demeanor that accompanies Zack Malibu is replaced with a scowl, a man completely focused at the task at hand.

 

* DING * DING * DING * DING *

 

BUFFER

The following contest at Anglepalooza 2006, sancation by the OAOAST Board of Directors, is for the OAOAST TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP! When the bell rings the referee in charge of the action, Charles Robinson. Are you ready? Wrestling fans...ARE YOU RRRRREADYYYYY? Then...from Toronto, Ontario, Canada... LLLLLLLLETS GET READY TO RRRRUMBLLLLLLLLLE!

 

"YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

 

BUFFER

Introducing first, the challengers...accompanied by their manager, the legendary James E. Cornette, weighing a total of 460 pounds, here are the former two-time tag team champions of the world, Sarcastic Simon and Narcissistic Ned, the NEW, NEW MIDNIGHT EXXXXXPRRRRESSSSSS!

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

 

Jim Cornette is the only one in the arena hooting and hollering for the New New Midnight Express, who raise their arms, smiling into the camera as they boost about becoming the first 3-time World Tag Team Champions.

 

BUFFER

Their opponents...hailing from Grand Rapids, Michigan and Providence, Rhode Island respectively...they weigh in at a total combined weight of 428 pounds. The reigning and defending, PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS OF THE WORLD... "SILKY SMOOTH" LEON RODEZ... ZACK MALIBU... THE UUSSSSSUUUUAAAAAAALLL SSSSUUUUUSSSSSPPEEEEECCTTSSSSSSS!!

 

The ROAR of the crowd is deafening. The Usual Suspects break out the old "Bash Brothers" routine, bashing their forearms together before removing their tag team titles and holding them up in the air for what could be the last time. They kiss their belts, with Leon getting a quick peck on Zack's belt...

 

COACH

Oh...:lol:..the symbolism. The Usual Suspects have just kissed the tag titles goodbye.

 

...and hand them over to referee Charles Robin-- No, wait. Chaos ensues when the Midnights grab the belts from the champs, resulting in a tug-of-war for the tag team titles. Zack and Leon let go of their end of the belts, causing Simon and Ned to fall back. The sold out crowd is electric as the New New Midnight Express and The Usual Suspects slug it out, with the World Tag Team Champions getting the better end of it. To the ropes go the NNMX and up into the cosmos via a pair of back bodydrops. DOUBLE NOGGIN'-KNOCKER sends the Midnights out to the floor and to a whining Jim Cornette.

 

COLE

This is not how Jim Cornette wanted the match to start. In fact, the match hasn't even begun. The bell hadn't sounded. Still, the World Tag Team Champions got this match off to a hot start, quickly getting the crowd into it.

 

The New New Midnight Express delay the start of the match for as long as they can, still shaking off the cobwebs, until Charles Robinson tells them to get on with the match. "Sarcastic" Simon Singleton and Zack Malibu start for their teams, but not before Simon and Jim Cornette share a hug. And another. And then one more for the road.

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

 

COACH

I don't know what's wrong with these people. Outside of being Canadian, of course. They obviously aren't bonding like Simon and James E.

 

* DING DING *

 

With the pre-match activites out of the way, the bell sounds and the match is officially underway. Ned high-fives Simon and cheers him on as he locks up with the incomparable Zack Malibu. Simon using his height and weight advantage to snap Zack over with an armdrag. He laughs in the franchise's face, saying that was too easy. That isn't the case when they lock back up, as it's Zack who flings Singleton across the ring with the armdrag takeover. The wrong side of the ring as Simon is drilled with a right hand from Leon Rodez as he gets up and is taken over again with an armdrag. Singleton crawls to his corner and confers with Blanchard and Cornette. After what's said is said, he and Malibu lock horns again. Simon backs Zack in the corner and surprisingly breaks cleanly on his own accord, but decides to act like a smart-ass afterwards, sticking his finger in Malibu's face, prompting the former World Heavyweight Champion to SLAP the taste out of the arrogant challenger's mouth. The competitive juices flowing, the two lunge forward and engage in yet another collar-and-elbow tie-up. Now it is Sarcastic Simon who is backed into the corner. Simon asks the referee to keep a close eye on Zack, to ensure he doesn't try to land a cheapshot. Wouldn't you know, it's Simon who takes the cheapshot...but Zack blocks the right hand and returns fire. He takes his reeling opponent over with a side headlock, which draws the ire of Ned Blanchard and Jim Cornette, both of who call for the immediate disqualification of The Usual Suspects, alledging Zack pulled on Simon's hair. A charge that is quickly dismissed by referee Charles Robinson.

 

COACH

That's right. You tell 'em, James E. Malibu pulled the hair!

 

COLE

He did not.

 

COACH

I saw it!

 

COLE

You only saw what you wanted to see.

 

COACH

And I suppose you didn't see Zack Malibu land that cheapshot.

 

COLE

What cheapshot?! It was Simon who attempt the cheapshot. Zack just defended himself.

 

CABOOSE

I find it rather humorous that Jim Cornette claimed the decision to include the stipulation the tag titles could change via countout or disqualification was to ensure The Usual Suspects did not resort to such tatics once frustration began to set in when, in his words, they couldn't defeat the New New Midnight Express. With all due respect to the New New Midnight Express' in-ring abilities, after what we've just seen, it's clear to me their entire strategy is based on exploiting the countout/DQ stipulation.

 

COACH

That's why it's called strategy, baby boy. And I don't wanna hear you or The Usual Suspects fan boys say Zack and Leon got screwed when they lose. Don't forget that old saying, "Guns don't kill people. People kill people." If either one of the Suspects crack under pressure -- and they will, just look at what happened this past Thursday night -- then they only have themselves to blame.

 

Charles Robinson has the gall to ask Simon if he wants to quit some 5 minutes into the match. Of course he doesn't. Unable to squirm out of the hold, Simon rolls Zack onto his back and holds onto a HANDFUL OF TIGHTS!

 

COLE

He's got the tights, Charles!

 

COACH

Quit complaining. As everyone who's attended referee's school knows, they're taught to keep their eyes on the shoulders at all times. Charles is only doing his job.

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

Zack is able to shift his weight over while maintaining the headlock. That doesn't prevent Simon from trying the same move again. But Zack shifts his weight back on top before Charles even has a chance to count. Simon gets up to a return base and looks to escape the headlock with a back suplex, but Zack floats over and takes Singleton down with a RUSSIAN LEGSWEEP!

 

ONE...

 

TWO-- KICKOUT!

 

The Franchise keeps Singleton grounded with a front facelock. But that doesn't last long, as Simon drives Zack into the corner and unleashes a barrage of knife-edge chops that sound off the "WOO" alarms. He brings Malibu out of the corner and sends him off to the ropes, only to get leveled by a shoulder block. Zack hits the near side and again knocks Singleton down with a shoulder block. Zack hits the ropes again, and he'll have company this time around as Simon joins him in running the ropes, resulting in the ever so popular CRISS-CROSS! They each zoom past the other until Zack falls to his stomach and leapfrogs over Singleton as he goes over the top and comes charging forward, then slides through the legs and catches Simon on the way back with a snap powerslam!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

Simon RAKES the eyes to break up the pin. He grounds Malibu with a side headlock takeover to slow the pace of the match, but Zack quickly counters into a headscissors...which Simon counters by floating on top of him. Zack BRIDGES up and into a BACKSLIDE!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

Simon slithers out but right into an arm-wringer. Simon somersaults over and kips-up, then drives the knee into Malibu's midsection. He traps Zack in the corner and rocks him with a big right hand. Malibu blocks Singleton's hiptoss out of the corner with one of his own. Singelton sent hard into the corner, and back bodydropped out. Zack takes Simon back to the mat with a headlock. Simon rises to his feet and fires Zack to the ropes. The Usual Suspects with a blind tag. Simon misses a back elbow and has Zack slide through his legs for a second time. He turns around and goes down from a DOUBLE DROPKICK. The Handsome Hustler gets caught coming in with a DOUBLE HIPTOSS, then is clotheslined over the top rope! The World Tag Team Champions turn their attention to Sarcastic Simon. They whip him to the ropes and take him up and down with a double back bodydrop. Blanchard tries blindsiding Leon and Zack with a clothesline, but they hear Ned rumbling towards them and move out of the way, leaving the Midnights to bump into each other! Though Toronto is far from Beverly Hills, down and out goes Ned, while his partner gets hung up between the middle and top ropes. Sarcastic Simon becomes a human teeter-totter, not to mention a punching bag, for The Usual Suspects, who take turns slapping him around. Zack then hits the ropes and sends Simon falling to the arena floor courtesy of a YAKUZA KICK~!

 

COLE

Oh, man. That caught Simon square in the jaw. The crowd is on their feet, rooting on The Usual Suspects who have dominated in the opening going of the match. Jim Cornette comforting his men on the outside. The odds are stacked against World Tag Team Champions, but they have come to fight tonight.

 

Jim Cornette consoles Simon, clutching his jaw, while Ned jumps on the apron and verbally abuses Charles Robinson for allowing the illegal double-teaming. Charles allows Ned to vent his frustration, remaining poised throughout. That all changes when Ned pushes Charles, who responds by SHOVING NED OFF THE APRON!

 

"YEEEEEEEEAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

 

COACH

Charles Robinson has no right putting his hands on a wrestlers.

 

COLE

Likewise for the wrestlers.

 

COLE

Yeah, but...

 

COLE

No ifs, ands, or butts. Now Jim Cornette is on the apron. What's he doing up there?

 

Jim Cornette quickly comes to the defense of Ned, berating Charles Robinson for shoving him and allowing the match get out of control. Charles explains the double-teaming was done within the alloted 5 seconds, but Cornette isn't having any of it. He gets up in Robinson's face, poking him in the chest with the TENNIS RACKET. The crowd gets behind Charles Robinson as he returns the finger-poke, letting James E. know he's the one in charge. Cornette slams his tennis racket to the floor and removes his purple polyester jacket, then throws it in Charles' face!

 

"OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH!"

 

Robinson grabs the jacket and throws it back at Cornette! The Louisville Slugger's had it now. He steps inside the ring and rolls up his sleeves, putting his fists up and challenging Charles to a fight. Charles doesn't know what to make of it. So he does what everybody would do -- he turns to the crowd.

 

"YEEEEEEEEAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

 

COLE

The crowd wants Charles to take Cornette up on his offer.

 

Even Leon Rodez gets into the act, also urging Charles to duke it out with James E. That swagger we all remember from Charles Robinson's "Lil' Naitch" returns as he accepts the challenge and motions for Cornette to bring it on.

 

COACH

What's Leon Rodez doing pouring gasoline onto the fire? A good referee wouldn't act the way Charles Robinson is. The guy's missed calls left and right tonight. He gave The Usual Suspects one of the most liberal 5 seconds in history. If you aren't out in 5, that's a DQ. By my count they were in the ring for 15 seconds. We should have new tag team champions.

 

COLE

15 seconds?!

 

Cornette and Robinson pair off in the corners of the New New Midnight Express and The Usual Suspects respectively. Cornette spars with Ned while Charles removes his stripped referee's shirt. When Cornette turns around and sees a now shirtless Charles Robinson flaunting TEH WATER PIZTOLZ~! he shrieks like a girl and high-tails it.

 

COACH

I--I can't believe it. Charles Robinson just punk'd James E.

 

CABOOSE

Charles is definitely in charge tonight.

 

COLE

Oh, yeah! Compared to his own flabby arms, Charles Robinson has GUNZ~! that rival Bohemoth.

 

As things calm down the Midnights make a change with Ned taking the place of Simon. He swings over the top rope and does a couple of leg stretches to warm up. He chicken struts up to Rodez and calls him every name in the book to try and rattle "The Silky Smooth One," but it's Ned who loses his cool when Leon starts mocking his martial arts background with goofy stances and Kung-Fu grunts. Ned gets in a karate stance and challenges Rodez to a martial arts contest.

 

COLE

I think we're gonna have ourselves a bonus attraction, boys. We've had a wrestling match, a referee and a manager getting into it, and now a karate contest. Only in the OAOAST.

 

COACH

Karate Fighters this ain't, Rodez. The Handsome Hustler is totally going to wipe the floor with the New-Age Love Machine. Neddy is the second coming of Bruce Lee, baby.

 

COLE

Uh, sure.

 

"LE-ON!"

"LE-ON!"

"LE-ON!"

 

Jim Cornette covers his ears with both hands, doing his best to block out the chants of "LEON." There's no question who the fans are behind. Ned and Leon are set to go in the ring. Blanchard fakes a right and comes back with kicks to the legs and ribs, sending Rodez reeling. Ned then takes aim at Leon's head, connecting with a back forearm shot but fortunately missing a roundhouse kick. Leon tries sweeping Ned off his feet, only to have Ned leap up and come down with a elbow to the top of the head. Ned doesn't let up, going right at Leon, working him over with martial arts blows to the body. He points towards Zack and tells him, "This is how you do it!"

 

COACH

:lol: Take note Zack. Ned's about to show you how to do a real superkick, a savate kick, son.

 

Ned lunges at Rodez, but Leon catches the leg and spins Ned around. Within seconds Ned goes from being in control to having a case of HEAMORRHOIDS after an inverted atomic drop. Rodez leaps onto Ned's chest, wrapping his arms around the Handsome Hustler's neck and driving him straight down into his knees with an inverted lungblower, which Ned sells like he's been shot out of a cannon, tumbling all the way over to The Usual Suspects corner. Ned bumbles around the ring like a drunken old man, jelly-legged and all, and eats a right from Zack. And one from Rodez. Another from Zack. The Silky Smooth One charges a doubled over Ned and takes him over with a flying headscissors. He goes for it again, but Simon is there with a right...that is blocked by Rodez, who decks Singleton from the shoulders of Blanchard, and then takes Ned over! Blanchard gets up in the wrong side of town, staggered by a roundhouse right from Malibu. Rodez seizes the moment, whipping Blanchard to the ropes and connecting with a FLYING FOREARM!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

Simon breaks the count up, scooping Leon up by the hair and throwing a punch...which Rodez blocks again and nails Singleton with a standing dropkick. Blanchard levels Rodez from behind with a Northern Lariat. He rams him face-first into Simon's knee. After an exchange is made, the Midnights deck Rodez with a double back elbow. They attempt to follow up with a back suplex, but Leon floats over the top and rolls the Midnights up.

 

COLE

He may pin them both!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

The Midnights kick Rodez off, sending him charging towards the ropes, where he springs off and nails both Midnights with a dropkick as they sit-up! Leon immediately tags in Zack, who climbs up the turnbuckles. Simon and Ned try escaping the ring, but they both roll the wrong way and BUTT heads, allowing Zack to connect with a SENTON BACK SPLASH!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

TH-- NO!

 

The Usual Suspects with a double cover!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

THR-- KICKOUT!

 

"OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH!"

 

Simon runs right into a double hiptoss and Patty Cake elbow drop. Well, not really. Despite Leon's best efforts he's unable to get Zack to go along with it, but they still drop the elbow. Like newly seperated conjoined twins trying to get back together, Leon and Zack kip-up and deck Ned with a pair of fists. Leon drags Blanchard over to The Usual Suspects in an armbar. The Usual Suspects with nothing but quick tags as they take turns coming off the middle turnbuckle with double-axehandles to the outstretched arm of Ned. Rodez and Malibu with a double arm-wringer on Blanchard, then they proceed to chop the hell out of Ned, knocking him off his feet. Firm believers in equality, they drop a double elbow on Ned and kip-up. They duck as Sarcastic Simon flies at them with a SLINGSHOT CROSSBODY, leaving the Sultan of Sarcasm to crash down onto Ned! Simon gets up holding his stomach, and is clotheslined over the top rope. Zack exits as Leon leaps onto Blanchard's shoulders for a hurricarana...but Ned counters with a POWERBOMB!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

Rodez gets a shoulder up. Blanchard hits a vertical suplex and drags Leon over to his corner, tagging Simon, who goes to the top. Leon is slingshotted in the corner, but he's able to grab the top rope and stop his momentum, headbutting Singleton in the stomach and HURLING HIM OFF THE TOP ONTO NED! An irate Jim Cornette calls for a disqualification, claiming the headbutt was low, but the calls fall on deaf ears. Ned misses another roundhouse kick and gets drilled with a regular atomic drop, causing him to bump into Simon yet again! They bail outside and shove each other, bringing the fans out of their seats as the New New Midnight Express are set to exploded.

 

COACH

No, fellas! Don't you see what they're trying to do? Divided and conquer. They know they can't beat you.

 

COLE

The Usual Suspects have completely frustrated the New New Midnight Express. From nearly the opening bell the World Tag Team Champions have dominated.

 

Jim Cornette gets between Simon and Ned, pleading with them to calm down, telling them everything will be fine if they get back to wrestling like the two-time World Tag Team Champions they are. Simon and Ned agree, shaking each others hands and embracing James E. in a group hug.

 

COACH

Yeah! Dr. Phil ain't got nothing on James E., baby. Go out there and kick their ass, fellas.

 

Blanchard returns to the ring and locks up with Rodez, taking him down with a drop toehold into a front facelock. Leon and Ned trade counters, reversing the other's hammerlock. Ned reaches between his legs and takes Leon's right leg out of under him. Spinning toehold into the Figure-- No! Leon uses his left foot to kick Ned off, sending him crashing into the corner. Scoope and a slam. Rodez tags Zack. Malibu with a fury of knife-edge chops and right hands. He whips Blanchard to the ropes and hits the TRENDSETTER!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

Simon steps in to break up the count, stomping Zack in the back of the neck. As the referee gets Simon out of the ring, Zack rams Ned into the top turnbuckle and tags Leon. Rodez whips Ned to the corner and charges in, using the middle turnbuckle as a springboard to drive the knee into Ned's handsome face! Blanchard stumbles out as Leon steps out on the apron and climbs to the top, bringing the fans up on their feet in anticipation. Leon soars through the air and connects with a FLYING CROSSBODY that would make Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat proud.

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

THR-- NO!

 

Leon grabs a side headlock, only to have Ned shove him off to the ropes after a couple of forearm shots to the ribs. Rodez takes Blanchard down with a shoulder block. Leon hits the ropes and pauses as Ned goes up for a leapfrog. He waits for Blanchard to come down before connecting with a...

 

JAB!

 

JAB!

 

JAB!

 

JAB!

 

JAB!

 

Rodez turns to the crowd and blows them a kiss. He then turns back to the opponent to compete MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT with an en-- NO! Ned ducks the enzurigi and lifts Rodez up for a back suplex, but Rodez floats over and drives him to the ropes. Ned makes the blind tag to Simon as he's rolled up.

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

Simon damn nearky decapitates Rodez with a SPRINGBOARD CLOTHESLINE! Simon tosses Leon outside, then taunts Zack to distract the referee while Ned slams Rodez on the floor. Charles Robinson turns around and sees Ned climbing back on the apron. He warns him to stay in the corner or risk disqualification. From his knees Leon grabs the bottom rope and pulls himself up onto the apron, only to have Simon rush him and lay him out with a running forearm smash to the sternum that sends Rodez CRASHING STRAIGHT BACK INTO THE GUARDRAIL!

 

COLE

Oh, my!

 

COACH

:lol: Yes! I told you. I told you we were gonna have new tag team champions. Leon's gonna get counted out.

 

CABOOSE

I can't see from my manage point, but I believe Leon has injured the ribs.

 

Caboose is right. Leon writhers around in pain on the arena floor, clutching his ribs. Zack rushes over to the aid of his partner, making sure the Midnights or their manager don't to take advantage of the situation. They do when Charles steps outside to demand Zack return to his corner. Simon and Ned scoope Leon up and drop stomach-first on the guardrail! Cornette then runs over and BLASTS Rodez across the ribs with the racket! He waddles back to the NNMX corner, struting around the ring. Zack tries getting to Leon but is stopped by the referee, who Zack nearly throws to the ground before realizing the consequences.

 

COLE

Oh, what a cheapshot by Cornette. The fact he's gloating about it is even more sickening. Zack is completely helpless in the corner as he watches the New New Midnight Express assault his tag team partner.

 

COACH

He can do something about it if he wants to. Hell, I'll personally hand him my chair to use.

 

CABOOSE

Let's not forget Leon's ribs were injured by the New New Midnight Express on The Love Shack a few months back. You have got to believe they aren't fully 100%.

 

COACH

Especially after they've went up against steel.

 

Ned looks to slam Leon again on the floor, but Charles Robinson catches him lifting Leon up. With a smile on his face Ned places Leon on the apron, as if he's saying "See, I was just helping him up." Charles doesn't buy it, telling Ned to go back to his corner. When he does Simon tags him in. Rodez goes face-first into the top turnbuckle in the NNMX corner. Blanchard shoves Rodez into the corner and works the ribs over with punishing open palm strikes, forcing Charles to escort him to the center of the ring so that Leon is allowed out of the corner. Jim Cornette hands Simon the hanky located on the outer breast pocket of his jacket, which Simon wraps around Leon's throat to CHOKE him with. Being asked to turn around by Zack, Charles only sees Simon wiping the beads of sweat off his forehead with the hanky. No illegal actives, much to the delight of Simon and James E. who high-five each other. He informs Zack of what he saw, all while Simon has started choking Leon again with the hanky. Zack's like "Fuck this" and runs past Ned and Charles, diving into the NNMX corner and hammering Simon with wild rights and lefts. Charles restrains Zack while Simon and Ned double-team Leon. Rodez fights back with right hands, but his comeback is short-lived as Ned rakes the eyes. Blanchard tags Simon, bringing Leon out of the corner in the process. Ned hits the atomic drop that sends Leon into the awaiting arms of Simon and an old school rib/backbreaker! Another quick tag from the Midnights, as Simon hangs Leon up on the top rope while holding onto his legs. Ned hits the far side and leaps over Simon, dropping a double-axehandle across the lower back/ribs of Leon. Rodez drops to his knees, resting his head on the middle rope, leaving Jim Cornette a clear shot at him. And Corny takes it, jabbing the handle of the racket into the throat! Cornette walks away, whistling, as if nothing had happened. Leon tosses and turns like a fish out of water, maybe having just shallowed his tonsils, if he still has them. Blanchard drapes Leon over the middle rope, driving the knee into the back of the neck to choke Rodez. The Midnight continue to use the referee to their advantage. As Ned brings Charles mid-ring, Simon hits Rodez with the point of the elbow across the head. Once Simon's work is done Blanchard swivels the arms and the hips, before hitting the ropes. CALL THE BITCH BOJANGLES...AND TELL HER I GOT CROTCHED ON THE MIDDLE ROPE!

 

"YEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH!"

 

Having moved out of the way, Leon gets up to his feet and hits Ned with THE FACIAL! Instead of going for the cover Leon chooses to go make the tag, but Simon comes in and grabs Rodez from behind, pulling him into his arms for a SLINGSHOT BACKBREAKER! Simon drags Ned to the corner and tags himself up. Higher than an eagle and RVD, Simon comes off the top with a GUILLOTINE LEGDROP! Blanchard and Cornette begin celebrating.

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

THR-- NO, KICKOUT!

 

Simon and Cornette complain about a slow count, voicing their frustration in the inability to finish off Rodez. Simon casually dumps Leon over the top rope like a teenage mother disposes her new born child in a dumpster. While Ned sends Leon crashing into the guardrail outside, Simon baits Zack in the ring by slapping him in the face. As the ref tries to keep Zack in his corner, Simon goes out after Leon and tries ramming him into the ringpost, but Rodez blocks it and posts Simon! The move buys Rodez a little time but not much, as Blanchard drops him with a double-axehandle off the apron. Malibu continues to struggle with the referee, all while the Midnights set Leon up for a double suplex on the arena floor...BUT RODEZ COUNTERS WITH A DDT!

 

COLE

A desperation DDT from Leon Rodez. But he's still isolated in the New New Midnight Express side of the ring.

 

Rodez may be isolated in the NNMX side of the ring, but he isn't isolated from his partner much longer, as Zack ignores Charles Robinson's request to stay in his corner and nails Simon and Ned with a RUNNING DIVING CLOTHESLINE FROM THE APRON!

 

COACH

Disqualifiy him, Charles, you idiot!

 

COLE

For what reason?

 

COACH

Disobeying referee's orders. Charles told Malibu to stay in his corner, and he didn't. He oughta DQ The Usual Suspects and award the titles to the NNMX.

 

Robinson warns Zack another outburst will result in a disqualification. Leon Rodez getting kicked in the ribs by Jim Cornette would result in a disqualification as well, but Charles doesn't see it. Narcissistic Ned is once again the legal man following a tag. He brings Leon up onto the apron, leaning him up against the ropes and hammers him across the chest with a hard forearm shot. Jim Cornette hits another cheapshot with the racket, jabbing it in Rodez' midsection. But it's Leon who gets the last laugh. He gets clotheslined into the ring by Simon, but lands on his feet and wipes out Cornette with a dropkick through the bottom rope! Leon catches Ned charging towards him with a back kick, and the two trade hiptoss attempts, with Rodez landing on the apron and ramming the shoulder into Blanchard's midsection through the middle rope. He flips into the ring and brings Ned down a sunset flip!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

KICKOUT!

 

Ned counters a hiptoss into an abdominal stretch, raking the fingers and elbow into the ribs. Blanchard waits for the right time to reach back and grab Simon's hand, to add further leverage to the submission hold. Leon's screams prompt Charles Robinson to look behind Ned, checking for any illegal activity. Zack shouts at Charles from halfway across the ring, telling him Ned is getting added support from Simon. Charles checks, and again sees nothing. Ned and Simon lock hands again, with Jim Cornette yanking on Simon's free hand to give his team more leverage. This time Charles Robinson catches the Midnights right in the act and breaks Simon's and Ned's grip with a kick, causing Ned to get hiptossed. As Leon makes a play for his corner, Ned trips him up and keeps him near the NNMX corner. He tags Simon in and whips Leon to the ropes. Drop toehold followed by elbow drop to the back of the head by Simon. Vintage Midnight Express. Simon with a scoope and a slam. He goes up to the top as Ned returns to the ring. ROCKET LAUNCHER!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

THREE!

 

 

 

NO!

 

Zack pulls Simon off. The Midnights with yet another tag. Beautifully executed double underhook suplex by Blanchard, who grinds the forearm into the side of the face as he covers.

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

Rodez kicks out of the nonchalant cover all too easily. Ned turns Leon onto his side and bars the arm and the leg, while sticking the knee in the spine of the back for a modified version of the bow and arrow.

 

COACH

This is the mark of a great team, fellas. The Midnights have completely isolated Rodez from that prima donna Zack Malibu. It's only a matter of time until Rodez gives up, is pinned, or has the referee stop the match because he's unable to continue. Quite frankely, if I was either one of The Usual Suspects, God forbid, I would of phoned the office and said I wasn't coming to work tonight. I would've forefited the belts and save myself the ass-kicking.

 

CABOOSE

Leon Rodez and Zack Malibu aren't that kind of champion. They aren't like a certain former World Champion who goes AWOL for weeks and shows up on national television to forefit the title every wrestler worth their salt strive to win. They're fighters. They're going to win like men, and they're going to lose like men. That's the sign of a true champion.

 

Leon punches Ned repeatedly in the face with his free hand until he's freed. He rocks Blanchard with right hands, but is raked in eyes and caught in the back of the head with a heel kick. Blanchard tags out in favor of Simon, who tries to ram Leon into the top turnbuckle but has his attempt thwart with a shot to the gut, and then is sent face-first into the turnbuckle! He quickly puts a stop to Rodez' momentum by raking the eyes. A heel's best friend. Simon follows up with a jaw-dropping right hand. He fires Leon to the far corner, following through and eating nothing but the sole of a boot by Rodez. Simon charges again, but gets caught with another boot to the face. Singleton tries his luck once more, and this time he doesn't get a boot to the face, but is rolled up with a sunset flip!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

KICKOUT!

 

Simon rushes to his feet and drops Rodez straight down onto his knee with an STO. Simon tags Ned in, and the Midnights whip Rodez to the ropes. DOUBLE FLAPJACK...COUNTERED INTO A FACEBUSTER!

 

Leon isn't looking to win Best Drama in a Wrestling Match as his dives to his corner and tags Zack, triggering a crowd EXPLOSION like no other. Ned is decked by a roundhouse right, as is Simon. An inverted atomic drop for Simon. And one for Ned. Malibu hits the ropes and levels Singleton with a clothesline. Malibu whips Blanchard to the corner and catches him coming out with a belly-to-belly suplex, which he uses to hit up the POP DROP fisherman's buster!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

THREE!

 

 

 

NO!

 

"OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH!"

 

Zack slaps his leg, signaling for the Yakuza Kick, and hits the ropes, where Jim Cornette awaits with a SHOT to the back with the tennis racket! Ned with an inside cradle.

 

COLE

No! What a horrible way to lose the titles.

 

COACH

The Usual Suspects will win like men, and they'll lose like men. Ain't that right, 'Boosey?

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

THREE-- NO, SIR!

 

"YEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH!"

 

Cornette just about has a coronary outside as Zack kicks out. Malibu whipped to the ropes. DOUBLE FLAP... LEON SPEARS SIMON TO THE MAT! Ned continues through with a singular flapjack, but Zack floats over and spikes him on his knee with a rock bottom backbreaker. Then, along with Leon, clotheslines Simon over the top to the floor. Leon waits in the corner as Zack scales the turnbuckles.

 

COACH

They're not gonna do what I think they're gonna do, are they?

 

THE ATOMIC BLONDE, a/k/a the Rocket Launcher!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

THRE-- NO! Cornette reaches underneath the bottom rope and yanks Zack off Ned. He leans up against the apron, scratching his forehead with the racket, business as usual. That's until Zack and Leon pull James E. up on the apron and slingshot him into the ring. They grab Cornette by the collar, cocking their right hands and looking at the crowd. Cornette gives his best arguement to be freed, but like WWE lawyers, he loses the case...and gets popped in the face! Simon jumps The Usual Suspects from behind, sending Leon to the floor with a running knee to the back, and wails away on Zack until Ned is able to join him. The Midnights rock Malibu against the ropes with hard right hands and knife-edge chops, then shoot him to the ropes. Zack avoids a double back elbow and gets tagged by Leon as he hits the ropes and levels Ned with a diving clothesline. Simon catches Zack getting up to his feet with a SWINGING NECKBREAKER and throws him outside. He turns around to meet Leon Rodez and a front facelock. Rodez runs up the turnbuckles and plants Simon with a tornado DDT. Leon then informs Ned NO FAT CHICKS allowed, successfully converting the hiptoss into a backbreaker ala a VHS tape into DVD. Rodez positions Blanchard near the corner and goes up to the top.

 

COLE

Oh, no. Don't tell me... Leon, the ribs! Remember the ribs!

 

COACH

Yes! Do it! Do it!

 

BECAUSE THE LADY LOVES... NO! Simon pulls Ned out of harm's way, and Leon avoids harm by landing on his feet. Rodez pulls Simon onto the apron, but Singleton snaps Leon's neck down on the top rope. The Midnights return to the ring and try to hit a double clothesline, but Rodez goes under, the Midnights momentum taking them running across the ring, where Zack trips Simon up and drags him outside. The two brawl on the arena floor as Leon catches Blanchard on the rebound with an EXPLODER SLAM!

 

COLE

That could do it!

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

THREE-- KICKOUT!

 

Rodez scoopes Blanchard up, who reverses Leon's Irish whip attempt and hangs him stomach-first on the top rope with a STUN GUN, knocking the air out of Rodez! Zack dives back into the ring to break up the count, but Simon holds onto his legs for dear life.

 

ONE...

 

TWO...

 

THREE!

 

* DING DING DING DING *

 

COACH

:lol:

 

COLE

The New New Midnight Express are tag team champions again!

 

BUFFER

Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of the match and NEW WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS, THE NEW NEW MIDNIGHT EXXXXXXPRRRRRESSSSSSS!

 

CUE: "Chase"

 

Michael Buffer hands the tag titles to Charles Robinson who has them stripped away by Jim Cornette. He enters the ring and presents the belts to Simon and Ned like a doctor handing a new born baby to its mother. The Midnights clutch the belts closely to their chests, cherishing the moment. Across the ring from them are the now former champions, The Usual Suspects. They walk up to Zack, who's attending to Leon, and taunt him with the tag titles. No one would blame Zack is he struck one or both of the Midnights, but he chooses to stand by his friend/partner and fight another day.

 

COLE

Zack showed what kind of a man he is right there. He isn't a prima donna, Coach.

 

COACH

And he isn't a champion any longer. :lol:

 

COLE (CONT'D)

He's a man. The Usual Suspects gave it all they had, but we have new World Tag Team Champions.

 

COACH

(singing)

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

 

COLE

History has been made, gentlemen. The first 3-time OAOAST World Tag Team Champions, the New New Midnight Express.

 

********************************

 

We cut to a shot of Axel watching the monitor in his office, a grin on his face.

 

AXEL

Bloody beautiful. This night couldn't get much better.

 

Looking to his watch, it's the turn of three of the OAOAST's Upstarts to pick their entry numbers, to the relief of General Manager Axel.

 

AXEL

Ah, finally!

 

WRIGHT

Good evening, Mr. General Manager.

 

O'HARA

G'Day, geez'. Sup?

 

AXEL

...uhm, yeah. Well, good luck guys.

 

Delving in first, Christian Wright selects his number and cracks it open whilst Bohemoth snatches a ball from the hopper with minimum fuss. O'Hara then takes his and one by one, each of the three Upstarts take a glance at their numbers, Axel eagerly trying to read their expressions. None of the three seem that happy, prompting Axel to move behind them and check the numbers for himself. And whatever worries he may have had seem to disappear.

 

AXEL

Perfect.

 

*Fade back to ringside*

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COLE

It's time for the big Six-Way Survival Scramble for the OAOAST Women's Championship, as Ashley Street puts her gold on the line against five of her top contenders. It hasn't been the best month for our champion. First off, let's hear some pre-recorded comments earlier today from most of the combatants!

 

(Cut to the HeldDOWN~! interview area, where all of these promos were filmed at, and "Floggin'" Molly Matthews is standing by...)

 

MOLLY

In three days, I get a chance to take home the most coveted prize in all of wrestling in the minds of myself and all of the women competing for it: the OAOAST Women's Title belt. I'll be honest: I think I might have fluked into this title shot. If it weren't for the random drawing, I have no clue if I would be in such a situation after losing to Serena Blackmore last month and not really being around too often. I am going to put my one-hundred-and-ten percent into this bad boy, and I know in my heart that, even if my win-loss record doesn't show it, I can defeat everyone in this match. In fact, I WILL defeat everyone in this match and take home the OAOAST Women's Title. Sorry, Ash; I think you're a cool person and all. But, I want the belt. And Serena, don't think I've forgotten about you. If we cross paths in this thing, don't think for a second I won't be afraid to kick your teeth down your throat! Anglepalooza 2005...I'm going home a winner!

 

(Cut to Constance, who's with Valerie)

 

CONSTANCE

In three days, I'm gonna defeat five other female competitors and take home the OAOAST World Women's Title belt, a belt that I should have been the inaugural champion of!

 

VALERIE

What about me?

 

CONSTANCE

You're awesome too; I was just referencing how I made it to the finals of the tournament this past summer.

 

VALERIE

Ah, true.

 

CONSTANCE

I'll tell you what though: after I win the belt on Sunday, I'll make sure you're the first contender to get a shot at my belt.

 

VALERIE

Cool, cool...and when we have our match, I promise that it shall set the highest example of sportsmanship around.

 

CONSTANCE

Let's shake on it...

 

(They shake hands, as the camera zooms out to show that both have crossed fingers behind their back)

 

(Cut to Confusia)

 

CONFUSIA

Ah bah da bah (holds out three fingers) ah ha ha ha! No more bah bah good times! I ROOOOOOAAAAR! (poses like a monster with arms spread out) Snappity neckbone, I kill all! Six, five, four, three, two, BOOM! Palooza win belt by me! (makes "title belt" motion with hands across waist) Feel power bah bah! THREE!

 

(Cut to Serena Blackmore)

 

SERENA

In three days, I get to cement a fact that I think I've already proven to the entire world: I am the very best female wrestler alive today. I got the big win over "Floggin'" Molly Matthews last month on Pay-Per-View, so I doubt I need worry too much about beating her. Generico's focused too much on revenge on Pantera Combatienta to really be a factor. Constance...I could see us forming a bond and taking the whole thing, but I'd totally beat her in the end. The rumor is that Ashley's practically having panic attacks over losing one stinkin' non-title match to Confusia. Geez. Either way, she's checked off. As for Confusia...she's a freak. Freaks don't win belts here. Therefore, prediction: Blackmore for Champion. That is all.

 

(Cut to Ashley Street, with her belt slung over her shoulder)

 

ASHLEY

In three days, I have possibly my biggest defense to-date with this Six-Way Survival Scramble match. I've heard all the rumors online and in the locker room after I lost to Confusia, about how I've been freaking out and working out to an unhealthy degree to get myself back in top shape for this defense. The fact is, it's true. When I felt defeat in that match, it made me feel as if, even though it was non-title, that I wasn't worthy of holding this title belt. That feeling ate at my stomach; it became an indescribable pain. I cannot force myself to feel that pain within me again. I MUST win this match, and I MUST redeem myself as the single best in the world at what I do, which is wrestle. Anglepalooza...I MUST WIN!

 

COACH

Interesting words from the wrestlers involved. Let's head to the ring!

 

("Volcano Girls" starts up, as Constance makes her way out to the ring, looking generally displeased with the audience around her.)

 

COACH

Interesting to note that Valerie, the other Minnesota Angel, isn't coming out with Constance.

 

COLE

Do you think maybe it has something to do with that title shot she was promised...?

 

("Ole!" by the Bouncing Souls starts up, as the crowd cheers the energetic entrance of El Chica Generico! Generico runs down the aisle, slapping hands with fans, and climbs up to the second rope to point up and pose.)

 

COACH

El Chica Generico, who's slated to face a competitor who claims that Generico is a disgrace to lucha libre and embarrassed Generico building up to AND during the 2005 OAOAST Pay-Per-View Match of the Year, the Torneo Cibernetica from November Reign, in Pantera Combatienta, is fighting an up-hill battle here, as while she's been involved somewhat on HeldDOWN~! in the past couple of weeks, she did take a month off and might be somewhat rusty.

 

COLE

This bout should be beneficiary to Generico, as it's going to be contested under lucha tag rules. If you exit the ring, anyone on the outside can come in.

 

COACH

Also, in a big announcement here, the first match for Anglemania V was made earlier today, as El Chica Generico will square off with Pantera Combatienta in a battle of feuding lucha stars!

 

("Leave You Far Behind" starts up, and out comes Serena Blackmore, who looks to be all business and paces quickly into the ring.)

 

COLE

Serena's really come into her own in the past month, defeating Molly Matthews uncleanly at Climax and generally becoming more well-known in the division. Then again, especially in the case of "Floggin'" Molly, she's made no friends in the process.

 

("Rebels of the Sacred Heart" starts up, and Molly bursts down the ramp. Serena exits the ring and takes a seat outside the ring to avoid Molly.)

 

COACH

Molly's what some would consider the dark horse here...she's one of the more prominent names in the division and has the skill to win the belt for sure, but she can't seem to get the win column lit up lately.

 

("A Bloody Murderer" starts up, and out comes Confusia on her hands and knees, slowly crawling through the smoke. She looks around in all directions, then darts into the ring and kneels down in a corner, still as can be.)

 

COLE

Here comes the woman who's been on the hottest of hot streaks lately. She's pinned OAOAST Women's Champion Ashley Street a few weeks back, albeit with the help of this bizarre, colored mist, in a non-title singles bout weeks ago! And this past Thursday, she knocked Street out cold before defeating Molly Matthews in the six-woman tag!

 

("Any Way You Want It" starts up, and out comes OAOAST World Women's Champion Ashley Street. She looks out at the cheering crowd, then walks down to the ring, looking as if she's trying to calm herself down while slapping hands with fans.)

 

COACH

Ashley's got a reason to be worried: she's got the odds against her with five challengers here, one of which has beaten her in the past month and left her for dead on Thursday!

 

::BELL RINGS::

 

COLE

Yeah...Buffer's still scared of Confusia.

 

Constance and Generico start the match off. They circle mid-ring, then go into a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Constance, much like in the six-woman tag on HeldDOWN~! a couple of weeks back, immediately goes in with a headlock. Generico is able to squeeze her head out, then shoves Constance down on her stomach with a legtrip. Generico then runs and comes off of the ropes, with Constance staying down for a drop-down. Generico leaps over her and bounces off the other side's ropes. This time, Constance gets up and leapfrogs over Generico. Generico comes off of the ropes again, this time ducking a back elbow. Generico comes off of the ropes yet again, and hits a great flying headscissors!

 

COLE

It took this match approximately twenty seconds to go to the air!

 

Constance rolls back up to her feet, but runs into a Dynamite Kid-style front dropkick that sends her back into the corner! Generico charges forward and leaps up for a monkey flip, but Constance catches Generico and keeps her in place. Constance flips Generico, but El Chica Generico lands on her feet! Constance charges out of the corner with a clothesline, but Generico ducks it and walks up the ropes, then hits a big top rope moonsault! Constance rolls to the outside, as Confusia enters the ring and comes from behind to go for a side suplex on Generico! But, Generico flips out and lands on her feet behind Confusia, then tosses her out of the ring! Constance slides right back in and jumps El Chica Generico from behind!

 

COACH

Say what you will about Constance, but she is one of the smartest wrestlers you'll ever see; very good at manipulating the rules.

 

Constance then lifts Generico up for a side suplex and drops her across the knee with a backbreaker. Constance won't let Generico down, pulling her up by the arm and sending her off with an Irish whip. Generico comes off of the ropes and gets lifted for a hiptoss that's converted right into a falling neckbreaker! Constance gets up, bounces off of the ropes, and hits a running back senton, then goes for the first pin of the match!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Constance pulls Generico up, then tries for a powerbomb...but Generico reverses with a hurricanrana! Generico leaps and tags to "Floggin'" Molly Matthews! Constance is up on her feet, as Generico charges at Constance and goes for a flying headscissors, which she converts to an armdrag in mid-air! Constance rolls to her feet, as Molly leaps, gets put up in a wheelbarrow, and brings Constance down with a bulldog! Molly leaps to the second rope, and hits a Lionsault twisted into a senton! She goes for the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Molly pulls Constance up and goes for a vertical suplex. But, Constance is able to land on her feet behind Molly, keeping Molly's head hooked so she can hit The Final Cut (reverse DDT into downward lariat slam). Constance grabs Molly's leg, drags her over, and tags out to Confusia. Confusia climbs to the top rope and hits a flying legdrop, then goes for the pin...

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia pulls Molly up, lifts her, and drops her with a sitout front-face suplex. Confusia pulls Molly up by the hair and sits her down on the top turnbuckle. Confusia then backs up to mid-ring, charges at Molly, and attempts to leap from the mat up to Molly's neck to bring her over with a top rope hurricanrana! But, Molly holds onto the top rope and Confusia's sent down onto her face! Molly shakes herself off and climbs to a standing position on the top rope. But, she made the mistake of being in Serena Blackmore's corner, as Serena reaches up and trips Molly, crotching her on the top turnbuckle!

 

COLE

I'm not sure of Serena's intentions with that, other than that she's not very nice.

 

Confusia's up to her feet, as Molly's basically hung in a reverse tree of woe. Confusia pulls Molly up completely horizontal, looking down at the mat, then leaps up and drives Molly down with a reverse Lungblower, knees going up into Molly's chest! The impact of the move brings Molly off of the top turnbuckle, and down to the mat. Confusia turns Molly onto her back, then springs off of the top rope to hit an Arabian press elbow drop! Confusia gets up and stands on Molly with one foot so she doesn't move, as Confusia tags in Serena Blackmore. Serena pulls Molly up and sends her off to the ropes with an Irish whip. Blackmore tries for a tilt-a-whirl slam as Molly charges back, but Molly slides over Blackmore's shoulder and hits a reverse DDT! Molly leaps away and tags in Ashley Street!

 

CROWD

::roars::

 

Street grabs Serena by the hand and sends her off to the ropes with an Irish whip. Ashley grabs Serena on the way back off of the ropes and slams her down to the mat with a flapjack. Serena comes up on all fours from the impact, as Street rushes off of the ropes and comes back with a low knee strik to the side of Blackmore's head! Ashley pulls Serena up and signals that she's going to powerbomb her into a corner! However, Serena is able to get out of this predicament by throwing repeated punches to the gut. Serena backs away, as Ashley holds her get. Serena charges at Ashley...but gets caught by Street, who then charges and drives her into the corner with a running spinebuster avalanche!

 

COLE

That's the amateur-wrestler-like strength of Ashley Street: she's got a low center of gravity and has weight to put behind it.

 

Serena slumps down to a seated position in the corner, as Ashley backs up. Street then charges...and nearly blasts Blackmore with a facelift (low dropkick to seated opponent in corner)! The momentum of the move sends Street herself to the apron, where she stands up and sticks her fist in the air to get a reaction out of the crowd. Street quickly climbs back in. But, just as quickly, Blackmore rolls to the outside. Ashley's in mid-ring, as Serena stumbles around outside...and Street hits an awesome tope suicida (dive through the ropes) that sends both of the wrestlers flying back into the guardrail!

 

COACH

NICE!

 

The crowd cheers wildly, as Street shrugs herself off and pulls Serena up. Constance walks down the apron to position herself in front of Serena & Ashley, then leaps to the second rope and hits an Asai moonsault onto both! Constance pulls Ashley up, as they both struggle on the outside. Serena's somewhat up, as Molly Matthews is in the ring, stomping to get the crowd behind her. Molly charges towards the ropes, then hits a sensational tope con hilo (running flip dive over top rope)! Confusia walks over to a corner close to the carnage while being catty-corner to it, then springboards to the top rope, does a turn-around hop to the top rope on the other side of the corner, and hits an tremendous moonsault onto the other wrestlers! That leaves El Chica Generico, who climbs into the ring, then walks over to the same side that the others are on at ringside, springboards to the top rope, and nails a beautiful corkscrew frog plancha onto the others!

 

CROWD

"OH-EH-OHSSST! OH-EH-OHSSST!"

 

Constance dove out of the formation before the dive was hit and therefore avoided it. She grabs Generico out of the pile of bodies and tosses her back into the ring. Constance rolls back in and pulls Generico up, nailing her with a chop immediately. Generico responds by delivering a chop right back. Constance stops Generico by responding back again by delivering a top elbow strike right in between the nose, dazing the luchadore. Constance sends Generico off to the ropes with an Irish whip, and hits a floatover neckbreaker (ala Shane Helms) on the way back. The rest of the competitors, who were on the floor, are slowly climbing back up to their corners. Constance goes for a cover...

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Constance pulls Generico up, drags her near Confusia's corner, then hits a brutal-looking snap suplex into the corner (just like the usual Northern Lights suplex-into-corner bump)! Constance tags out to Confusia, who brings herself into the ring with a slingshot legdrop. Confusia pulls Generico up instead of going for the cover, choosing to add to the damage before going for the pin with a bridging German suplex!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia pulls Generico up quickly and brings her over with a Russian legsweep. Confusia keeps ahold of Generico and rolls all the way backwards up to her feet with it, with Generico at her side. Confusia uses this position to apply an Octopus hold! Constance falsely yells at the referee that Ashley grabbed a chair, causing him to turn around and be distracted long enough for Constance to come off of the top rope and deliver a flying knee strike to the side of Generico's head while still in the octopus! Constance rolls out while the referee turns around to see Confusia convert the move into a gutwrench sit-out bomb!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia screams to the sky in frustration, then tosses Generico to Serena Blackmore's corner. Confusia tags out to Serena, who pulls Generico up as soon as she enters the ring and applies a headlock. Generico escapes the hold with an elbow to the stomach to loosen it, followed by shoving Serena off to the opposite corner. Generico charges at her, but gets a boot to the face for her troubles. Generico turns around and stumbles in a daze, as Blackmore climbs to the second rope. She pulls Generico close, then hits a falling Kanyon Knee Drive right in between Generico's shoulder blades. Serena pulls Generico up and applies a cravate. Generico struggles in the neck crank, stomping her feet to try and get the crowd behind her. The crowd claps, as Generico delivers a series of elbows to Serena's stomach, allowing her to escape. Generico runs and comes off of the ropes on the other side. But, Serena is able to side-step and leap up beside Generico, delivering a step-up enziguri kick that sends Generico to the outside!

 

COLE

Generico's actually lucky that she spilt to the outside! If she would have stayed in after a blow like that, she would have been pinned for sure!

 

Serena backs up, but Molly Matthews runs back into the ring! Serena goes to the outside, scared! While Molly is distracted, yelling at Serena to get back into the ring, Constance jumps her from behind! Constance sends Molly down with a forearm to the back of the head, then pulls her up, lifts her for a suplex, and slings her over to drop Molly down with an Ace Crusher! Constance kips up and bows to boos from the crowd. Constance then comes off of the ropes and hits a leaping kneedrop. Constance kneels down and applies a grounded abdominal stretch to Molly. The crowd starts to clap for Molly to get out of the hold, so Constance, to irritate the crowd and add insult to injury, starts chopping Molly's chest to the beat of the crowd's claps!

 

COACH

The abdominal stretch is bad enough, is this chopping really necessary?

 

Constance cranks back on the hold, but Molly isn't softened up nearly enough to tap to it. So, Constance turns her over onto her stomach, then comes off of the ropes and hits a devastating reverse Hennig Neck Snap! Constance pulls Molly up and sends her off with another Irish whip, then catches her coming off with a spinebuster converted into a reverse Side Effect-like facejam! Constance rolls Molly over a little too close to the ropes and goes for the cover...

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

...Confusia tags herself in from Constance! Constance stands up and starts arguing with the masked one. They yell and bicker back and forth, giving Molly time to get herself together. Confusia and Constance start getting into a shove-fest, as Molly's up and charges at them! Confusia dodges Molly, but Constance gets clotheslined over the top rope and to the floor! However, the momentum of the charge causes Molly to get herself stuck over the top rope. Confusia grabs Molly, lifts her, and drops her down with a wheelbarrow chestbuster. Confusia goes for the cover...

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia grabs Molly by the ankle to keep her still, as she tags out to Serena Blackmore. Serena and Confusia pull Molly up, as the referee gives a five-count for Confusia to go back to the corner. They send Molly off with a double Irish whip. Molly bounces off of the ropes, and Confusia gives her a high back-body-drop onto Serena's bent knee! Serena quickly pulls Molly up to a bent position and delivers a stiff forearm to her back. Serena pulls Molly up and sends her off to the ropes with an Irish whip. Molly comes off of the ropes and ducks a clothesline, then comes off from the other side. Serena turns around in time to be able to grab Molly, throw her up, and bring her down with a version of a sit-out bomb. Blackmore tells the referee not to count Molly down, as Serena hooks her leg around Molly's while turning her over, and attempts to go for the STF...but Molly gets to the ropes before the hold can be applied!

 

COLE

Nice ring awareness by Matthews.

 

Serena pulls Molly up and dazes her with a stiff European uppercut, then sends her off again with another Irish whip. Molly comes off of the ropes and Serena makes the mistake of telegraphing a backdrop too soon. Molly rolls over Serena's back, hooking her arms in the process, and brings her over with a backslide!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Serena's up first and grabs Molly by the head as they both rise. Blackmore then hits a spinning neckbreaker. Blackmore pulls Molly up, twists her wrist, then sends her off with an Irish whip. Serena comes off of the ropes catty-corner of Molly, and they collide mid-ring as Serena hits a Pounce-style dropkick to Molly's left side! Molly rolls out to the apron. Serena doesn't give Molly any time to recuperate, as she walks right over and tries pulling Molly up. Molly puts up a struggle, and is able to headbutt Serena in the mid-section to make her let go. Molly gets up and pulls Serena through the ropes and to the apron. Molly hooks Serena and attempts to go for a suplex to the floor, but Serena blocks. Serena repeatedly punches Molly in the stomach, then goes for a belly-to-belly suplex to the floor. But, Molly blocks that. Finally, Molly forearms Serena in the face, leaps up onto Serena, and delivers a huge hurricanrana to the floor!

 

COACH

GEEZ!

 

Ashley Street runs into the ring to replace one of them on an automatic tag, but walks right over to survey the damage of that devastating move! The referee tells Ashley to get back into the match, as she slowly backs up from the ropes. Confusia springboards to and off of the top rope and delivers a dropkick to the back of Ashley's head that sends her crashing down onto her face! Confusia immediately pulls Molly up and hits a spinning fisherman's buster (Perry Saturn's old finisher), then goes to the top rope and hits a beautiful backflip elbow drop! Confusia goes for the pin!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia yells "URRRGH!" at the referee, then pulls Ashley up, lifts her for a suplex, then turns it into a elevated Flatliner. Confusia gets up and stomps Ashley a few times in the stomach and follows up by dragging her to Constance's corner and tagging out. They both give Ashley an Irish whip to the ropes, catch her with a hiptoss on the way back where they catch her legs to keep her up (ala Lo Down), and drop her with a sitout powerbomb/reverse X-Factor combo! Confusia rolls out of the ring, as Constance keeps Ashley down for the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Molly Matthews has found her way to her corner, as Serena's crawling near hers. Constance viciously pulls Ashley up by the hair, as the frustation of no one being eliminated yet is mounting. She hooks Ashley between her legs, then drives her down face-first with a no-underhook pedigree. Constance decides to then take time to literally rub Ashley's face into the mat, as a chorus of boos is heard. Constance gets up and specifically yells at one fan who told her to "move her ass". She points out the guy and repeatedly calls him "a bum". Constance finally cools down and turns around, as Ashley Street is slowly trying to get up. Constance pulls her up all of the way, then sends her off with an Irish whip. Constance comes off of the ropes on the other side and tries for a leaping lariat...but Ashley swats her out of the sky with a HARD clothesline! The crowd cheers, as Ashley stands in place and shows off her fighting spirit, screaming outward with energy. Just then, Constance grabs onto Ashley's ankle and tries to hold her in place. Ashley slowly struggles forward, trying as hard as she can to get to tag out to El Chica Generico!

 

CROWD

"ASH-LEY! ASH-LEY!"

 

Street's struggling slowly, as Constance remains to be dead weight in an attempt to anchor Street down in place. Ashley takes another step, as the crowd gets louder. Street's able to take one more step before finding herself unable to move any further forward with Constance slowing her down. She stomps at Constance's fingers twice, but she won't break the clutch. Finally, Ashley kicks backwards and nails Constance in the face! Constance lets go, Ashley leaps forward, and El Chica Generico is in!

 

COLE

OLE!

 

Constance immediately backs away as quickly as possible in a scurry, until she is able to roll out of the ring. Confusia runs in and goes for a clothesline, but Generico ducks the clothesline and hits a big high-angle side suplex that drops Confusia on her neck! Confusia rolls to the apron for safety. Generico walks over to the apron to grab Confusia. She gets Confusia up to her feet and tries to suplex her back in. But, Confusia connects with a knee strike to the face to escape. Confusia grabs ahold of Generico like she's going for a suplex, then slingshots herself back into the ring over the top rope, using the momentum to bring Generico over with a tornado snap suplex! Confusia holds onto it, as she pulls Generico up. She crosses Generico's legs, lifts her like that, and drives her down with a cross-legged Michinoku Driver!

 

COLE

Geez!

 

El Chica Generico rolls to the outside to avoid being pinned, while Molly Matthews runs into the ring to replace her. Molly gets caught with a knee to the stomach by a kipped-up Confusia. Confusia sends Molly off to the ropes with an Irish whip, but Molly comes off of the ropes and hits a big tornado DDT! Confusia rolls to the outside, while Molly is stomping her foot to get the crowd clapping in rhythm for a dive. Molly bounces off of the ropes behind her...and gets tripped up by Serena Blackmore, who's still on the floor! The crowd boos, as Molly gets up and starts arguing with Serena! This distraction allows Confusia enough time to slide back into the ring and nail Molly from behind with a running boot to the back of the head! That allows Confusia to turn her around, place the head in-between her legs, and yell "UNCANNY ILLUSION HAMMER!" She lifts Molly, spins around with her over the shoulder, and twists her to slam her on her face! Confusia goes for the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THREE!

 

BUFFER

"Floggin'" Molly Matthews has been eliminated!

 

******

"FLOGGIN'" MOLLY MATTHEWS

Eliminated: 1st

Eliminations: None

Eliminated By: Confusia

***************

 

COLE

Give the major assist to Serena Blackmore! I wish they'd just settle this beef!

 

Molly is rolled to the outside, as officials swarm to ringside since it looks as if Molly might have tweaked her neck on the move. They attend to her at ringside, as El Chica Generico climbs up to the apron, springboards off of the top rope, and hits a flying armdrag on Confusia! Confusia rolls back up to her feet and misses a running clothesline. Confusia keeps running and comes off of the ropes. She ends up running right into a big spinning Blue Thunder Bomb! Pin!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Generico rises to her feet and signals for her big move, the BRAINBUSTAAAA! She pulls Confusia up and hooks her for it, but Confusia blocks. Generico delivers a forearm to Confusia's stomach to keep the advantage, then tries to focus her efforts towards a powerbomb instead. Confusia gets lifted, but slides out the back end. She leaps over and tags out to Constance. Generico runs at Constance and leaps, being caught in a wheelbarrow. Generico pushes upward and tries to hit a DDT...but Constance reverses it into an elevated jawbreaker! Constance keeps ahold of Generico's head and chains that into a spinning neckbreaker. Constance keeps ahold of Generico's head as she comes to her feet, then lifts her in a fireman's carry position and hits a Samoan Cutter (TKO Stunner)! Generico ends up being dazed, but staying in a kneeling position. Constance comes off of the ropes and hits a Shining Yakuza kick!

 

COLE

Geez!

 

Constance could easily go for the cover, but she decides to sit Generico up and give her a LOUD back chop! Constance comes off of the ropes and hits a big Hennig Neck Snap! While Generico holds her neck on the ground, Constance leaps to the second rope and hits a front elbow drop. Constance goes for the cover...

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Constance can't believe it! She yells at the referee, as her words become inaudible. She pulls Generico up, as Generico tries to make herself dead weight. Constance hooks Generico's head and goes for a Snapmare Driver, but Generico blocks it. Constance delivers a knee to Generico's gut and sends her over with a regular snapmare. Constance runs, bounces off of the ropes, and hits a leaping kneedrop. She goes for another cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Constance wastes no time in pulling Generico up, as she immediately goes for the Package Piledriver! She hooks the arms, but Generico headbutts Constance in the stomach twice to break free. Generico leaps up onto Constance for a hurricanrana, but Constance catches her. Generico struggles for an escape out of the attempted powerbomb with punches and is able to slide out of the back end, bringing her over with a sunset flip!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Generico leaps and tags out to Ashley Street! Constance rolls out of the ring, and the recovered Serena Blackmore comes in. She charges and goes for a kick, but Street catches the leg! Street pulls Blackmore closer, then hits an overhead release Exploder suplex! Blackmore tries rolling out, but Ashley grabs her in the nick of time. Street pulls her up and tries lifting her for a Burning Hammer, but Serena holds onto the top rope to stay put The two struggle relentlessly until Molly Matthews pops up from being attended to by the officials at ringside, leaps onto the apron, and BLASTS Serena with a headbutt that knocks her silly!

 

COACH

She faked the whole injury!

 

COLE

Serena deserved it!

 

That allows Ashley to lift Serena up and DRILL her with a Burning Hammer! PIN!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THREE!

 

BUFFER

Serena Blackmore has been eliminated!

 

************

Serena Blackmore

ELIMINATED: 2nd

ELIMINATED BY: Ashley Street

ELIMINATIONS: None

**************************

 

Molly yanks Serena out of the ring and goes to work with an ambush of forearm strikes! The referees and officials who had come down to check over Molly's neck now act as a wall to get Molly away from Serena and get them both to the locker room safely!

 

Confusia runs into the ring, as Ashley's distracted by the chaos around the ring, and brings her over in a surprise schoolgirl!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Both come up, and Confusia goes for a tombstone piledriver. Ashley knees Confusia in the face and is able to reverse it into a tombstone of her own! But, Confusia is able to turn the tables again and reverse into a tombstone for herself again! Constance comes into the ring and connects with a low dropkick to Confusia's knees, basically forcing Confusia to finally hit the tombstone piledriver! Constance goes back to her corner, as Confusia goes for the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia immediately pulls Ashley up and goes for an Irish whip. But, Street stays down low so Confusia can't move her. Confusia gets tired of it and kicks Ashley in the chest. She then hooks her in a pumphandle position and folds her like an accordian with a pumphandle side suplex of sorts! Confusia goes for the cover again!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

She pulls Street up by the hair and starts yelling at her in tongues! This tongue-lashing gives Street time to recuperate enough to forearm Confusia in the stomach. Street goes for a Gorilla Press slam, but Confusia punches her in the neck to escape, then drops Street with a leaping Ace Crusher. Confusia drags Street with her and tags Confusia. They both pull Ashley up and bring her over with a double Russian legsweep, as all three roll backwards, back up to their feet. Constance comes off of the ropes while Confusia holds onto Ashley, and they hit a Russian Legsweep/Yakuza kick double-team combo!

 

COLE

Situations like this make the oddest bedfellows!

 

Constance goes for the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

The crowd cheers the struggling Street on, as Constance pulls her up and hits a side backbreaker, which she chains into a side suplex lift backbreaker, which she then somehow chains into a Lungblower! Constance rolls Street onto her back and hits an elbow drop. Constance bounces off of the ropes, hits a rolling senton, and uses the momentum from the roll to leap up the ropes and hit a big top rope kneedrop to the back! Constance immediately goes for the cover...

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

The crowd cheers, as Constance pounds the mat with her fists in frustration. She pulls Ashley, holding her back, up and goes for an Irish whip. Ashley comes off of the ropes and ducks a clothesline. She comes off of the ropes on the other side, and both collide in mid-ring and go down from delivering Yakuza kicks to each other! Both struggle on the ground, trying to get to their feet and make the tag, as the crowd claps and cheers along for Ashley. They both slowly crawl...but Constance gets to her corner first and tags Confusia! Street's not far behind however, and tags out to El Chica Generico!

 

The crowd roars, as Generico & Confusia run to mid-ring. Confusia nails a vicious chop, and Generico replies with one of her own. Confusia rears back and hits another chop, followed by Generico reacting with a loud overhand chop. The two wrestlers go back and forth with their loud chops, one after another. Finally, Confusia scores the advantage by simply headbutting Generico right in between the eyes, causing a loud thud. Confusia then lifts Generico and hits a corkscrew suplex (half-way lift, then twist around and drop). Confusia then turns Generico over and lifts her in a wheelbarrow. But, Generico twists around and reverses with a DDT! Confusia rolls to the apron. Generico stomps her foot on the mat repeatedly to get the crowd clapping for her. Confusia gets to her feet on the apron, Generico comes off of the ropes and charges at her, but Confusia side-steps and Generico dives through the middle and top rope and hits nothing but guardrail on a poetic tope (flip tope through the ropes)!

 

COACH

DEAR GOD!

 

The crowd's in stunned awe from the fall they just saw Generico take! Confusia wastes no time in climbing up to the top rope and hitting an awe-striking Cancun Tornado (corkscrew moonsault) to the floor and onto Generico! Constance and Street come in, while the fans are still freaking out over the aerial assault on the floor. Ashley plasters Confusia in the face with a rolling forearm strike. That dazes Constance enough to get hooked and hit with a Northern Lights suplex! Street doesn't bridge with it, but does hold on. She backs up into a corner and suplexes Constance into the corner! Confusia's recovered from her dive to the floor enough to come in and hit a multi-rotation satellite headscissors takedown on Ashley out of nowhere! Confusia then hits a standing moonsault and goes for the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia slowly pulls Street up, as exhaustion is definately setting in. She hooks Street and hits a sitout pumphandle bomb into the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia pulls Ashley up and tries to go for a suplex, but Street fights her way out. However, Constance recovers from the corner suplex just in time to jump Street from behind. Constance and Confusia then grab Street's arms, lift her straight up in the form of a "t" with her arms straight out, then fall back and drop Ashley straight on her face! Confusia and Constance come up to their feet and embrace with a handshake, which Confusia acts like she doesn't understand the concept of. What they don't see is El Chica Generico, holding her back but climbing up to the top rope. The two dastardly ones in the ring turn around and Generico hits a beautiful top rope moonsault onto both! Generico pulls Confusia up and forearms her in the back to keep her bent. Generico goes up top and hits an awesome moonsault backsplash that sends Confusia down in a heap! Generico pops right back up to celebrate hitting the move, and walks right into a Snapmare Driver from Constance!

 

COACH

Don't show off, goof!

 

Constance goes for the pin immediately!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Generico gets her foot on the bottom rope! Constance pouts, then pulls Generico up and hooks her head for another Snapmare Driver. This time, Ashley Street busts out of nowhere with a lariat to break that up! Street leaps onto Constance for the pin!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Street looks angry about that. She pulls Constance and puts her in a full nelson. Constance tries struggling out, so Street dumps her on her neck with a release Dragon Suplex! Confusia attacks Street before she can go for the cover, but El Chica Generico shoves Confusia off of Street, sending her to the floor! Generico taps Street on the back and points at Constance. Ashley then lifts Constance up on her shoulders in a Burning Hammer position. Generico then goes to the apron, springboards off the top rope, leaps up onto Constance's stomach to use the other two as a springboard, then bounces off the top rope and hits an incredible Arabian Press dive to the floor on Confusia!

 

CROWD

"OH-EH-OHAST! OH-EH-OHAST!"

 

The referee's lost all control of anyone being legal! The crowd's going nuts for this incredible move, as Street goes for the Burning Hammer. But, Constance fights her way out of it. Both wrestlers in the ring turn to face each other, and Constance connects with a kick to the stomach, which she follows up with an Implant DDT! Constance pauses for a second to just lay down and rest. That proves to be a mistake, as El Chica Generico's back up on the apron! She springboards off of the top rope and hits a big legdrop! Generico goes for the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Generico pulls Constance, but Constance escapes Generico's grasps. She performs a go-behind, lifts Generico for a side suplex, then hurls her upside down into a corner! Ashley Street charges at Constance, but Constance side-steps and sends Ashley to the floor. Confusia stumbles into the ring, and Constance tells her to go to the top rope. She slowly does, as Constance grabs Generico and hooks her. Constance has Generico's body packaged up, and Confusia leaps...PACKAGE PILEDRIVER WITH A FLYING DOUBLE STOMP ON GENERICO! Constance goes for the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THREE

 

*************

El Chica Generico

Eliminated: 3rd

Eliminated By: Constance

Eliminations: None

*************

 

El Chica Generico is rolled out of the ring and helped to the back. Constance sticks her hand out and makes Confusia shake it. Constance steps out and throws her arms up in victory...and gets schoolgirled by Confusia!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Constance pops up and shoves Confusia! Confusia shoves right back! The two are arguing in the middle of the ring! Ashley Street rolls back up into the ring. She comes up from behind Constance, and Confusia shoves her right into a schoolgirl from Street!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Constance gets up from that and starts to throw a fit, as Ashley laughs...but not for long, as Confusia leaps onto Street and drives her down with a reverse hurricanrana! Constance hooks Confusia in a front pumphandle, then flips her over and drives her down with a backbreaker! Constance then re-hooks Confusia and hits a bridging side slam for a pin!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Constance then starts to slowly climb up the ropes, looking for a moonsault. Street, kind of dazed, rolls Confusia out of the way, then runs and hits an awesome run-up-the-ropes German suplex on Constance! Street goes for the pin!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Confusia gets a bodyscissors on Street and rolls her into a sunset cradle to break it up!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Both come up, and Street scores with a go-behind into a waistlock. After a struggle, Confusia gets a standing switch into one of her own. They struggle again, as Constance climbs to her feet, albeit just about out cold on her feet. Street gets the advantage back into a waistlock of her own, then goes for a release German suplex! But, Confusia catches Constance with her feet on the way down and is able to whip herself around to hit a flying headscissors out of the flip!

 

CROWD

"NICE! NICE! NICE! NICE!"

 

Confusia gets up and tries for a tornado DDT on Street. Street keeps stationary and is able to get Confusia on her shoulders to block the DDT, then tosses her up and brings her down with the double-knee gutbuster! Street gets up and shows her fighting spirit, but somehow, Constance is back up, hooks Street, and drops her with a cobra clutch backbreaker! Constance grabs Confusia, lifts her for a side suplex, and drops her in a back senton onto Street's stomach. Constance shoves Confusia off and goes for the cover on Street!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Constance pulls Street up, but Confusia shoves Constance out of the way. With Street bent, Confusia goes for a Code Red. But, before she can flip Street over with it, Constance grabs her with a front facelock and drives her down with an elevated DDT! Street shakes herself off, then goes crazy with a series of forearm strikes to Constance's face! She tosses Constance into a corner and goes nuts with a series of thrust kicks to the stomach! She follows up with four repeated, thudding headbutts! Confusia rolls to the apron to avoid Street, then climbs up to the top rope in the same corner that Constance is in. Constance reaches up and crotches Confusia on the top turnbuckle. Constance drops down to a seated position in the corner, which proves to be a huge mistake, as Street takes her face off with a huge running bootscrape!

 

COLE

Ashley's been KILLING Constance!

 

Ashley then pulls Constance out of the corner and bridges with a fisherwoman's suplex!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Ashley sees Confusia starting to get to her feet on the top rope, and looks to have an idea. She lifts Constance up in an electric chair on her shoulders. Street walks in close to Confusia, who then ducks Constance's head in between her legs...OH MY GOD! CONFUSIA WITH THE TOP ROPE CANADIAN DESTROYER, AS CONSTANCE FLIPS ASHLEY OVER WITH A REVERSE RANA WHILE TAKING THE TOP ROPE DESTROYER~!

 

CROWD

"THAT WAS AWESOME! :clap clap clap clap clap:: THAT WAS AWESOME!"

 

COLE

Okay...that might be the single most dynamic thing I've ever seen!

 

Confusia leaps onto Constance to make the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

BUFFER

Constance has been eliminated!

 

************

Constance

Eliminated: 4th

Eliminated By: Confusia

Eliminations: El Chica Generico

**************

 

COLE

And then there were two...

 

The crowd is still cheering for that move, as Constance is rolled out of the ring and helped to the back. Confusia sees that Ashley looks out cold after being dumped on her head with the reverse rana portion of that incredible moment, and goes for the cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia and the crowd cannot believe it! She pulls Ashley up and hooks her arms, then hits a big Tiger Driver! Cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia shakes her head in disbelief! The crowd's getting behind Ashley with their cheers! Confusia pulls Ashley up, hooks her for a pumphandle, then lifts her and dumps her on her head with a brainbuster-like move! Pin by Confusia!

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia looks to be twitching with anger, as she gets up and immediately climbs to the top rope. She launches off and goes for a 450 Splash...but Ashley rolls away and Confusia misses! Confusia rolls out to prevent splatting, as both come up to their feet! Street blocks a forearm to the face, and kicks Confusia in the stomach. Street somehow finds the strength to gorilla press Confusia over her head and tosses her into the corner upside down! Street pulls Confusia up in a double chicken wing and hits a bridged Tiger Suplex!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Street pulls Confusia up and goes for an Exploder into the corner. Confusia blocks it twice, then escapes with a series of elbows to the back of the head. She goes to the apron, as Ashley stands there, stunned. Confusia springboards to the top rope...double stomp to the back of the head! Street's down on her knees dazed, as Confusia positions Street in between her legs...

 

CONFUSIA

"UNCANNY ILLUSION HAMMER!"

 

She lifts Street up...spins around...and drives her down! She hit her finisher and goes for the cover!

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

COLE

NO WAY!

 

Confusia's eyes have widened of shock, and the crowd's erupted! Confusia pulls Street up and yells out for another. She tries it, but Street's all dead weight. Confusia decides to not waste time and just go to the top rope. Street's bent over, and Confusia goes for a back senton onto Street's back...but Ashley stands up and Confusia misses! Confusia comes up to one knee...SHINING I HATE YOUR FACE! COVER!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Street lifts Confusia onto the top turnbuckle and sits her down facing the crowd. Street climbs up and sits behind her, then goes for a Spider German Suplex! But, Confusia somehow is able to flip onto her feet, leaving Street in the tree of woe. Confusia quickly hits a stiff baseball slide to Ashley's face! Street crumbles to the mat, as Confusia pulls her up and blasts her in the face with a forearm shot! Confusia keeps an almost-unconcious Street up on her feet by holding onto the back of her head, as she nails her with another stiff forearm blow!

 

CROWD

"ASHLEY! ASHLEY! ASHLEY!"

 

The crowd gets louder and louder in their support of Street, as Confusia connects with yet another forearm strike. Somehow, the cheers from the crowd seem to be awakening Ashley, as she's slowly coming to. Confusia nails her with another forearm to the face...and Street glares back, looking as if the shot woke her up! Street grabs the back of Confusia's head and goes nuts with a series of rapid-fire, stiff forearm shots to the head! She then hooks Confusia and goes for a suplex, but Confusia reverses in mid-move and gets a small package!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Confusia is up first and is able to leap up with both feet onto Street's back as she gets to a bent position and comes down with a Rocker Dropper to the mat! Confusia quickly rolls Street over and drags her close to a corner. Confusia then busts out the Ultimo Dragon-like headstand in the corner and slings herself to hit the Arabian Press moonsault! Cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

The crowd's going crazy! Confusia's basically busted out everything in her arsenal, but Street's still fighting! Confusia then signals that the match is over and starts to climb the ropes. Somehow, Street is able to pull herself up using the ropes, with the top rope also being used to be shaked and crotch Confusia! Confusia stays seated on the turnbuckle, as Street pulls herself up the ropes. Street slowly climbs to the second rope, then positions Confusia's head in between her legs. Street tries lifting, looking as if she's somehow going to try for a second rope piledriver, but Confusia escapes by repeatedly punching Street in the mid-section. Confusia grabs onto Ashley so that she doesn't fall to the ground. Confusia then stands up on the top rope and pulls Street up with her. Confusia is somehow able to lift up Street into a Razor's Edge-like position, leaps off....TOP ROPE CRUCIFIX PILEDRIVER!

 

CROWD

"HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!"

 

Confusia uses the little might left in her to roll over and cover Ashley!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREE!

 

COLE

NEW CHAMPION! NEW CHAMPION!

 

*************

Ashley Street

Eliminated: 5th

Eliminated By: Confusia

Eliminations: Serena Blackmore

*********************

 

BUFFER

YOUR WINNER and NEEEEEEW OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION OF THE WOOOOOOORLD! COOOONFUUUUUSIA!

 

Officials rush into the ring to even check to see if Street is still alive after that hellacious move! The referee assigned to the match brings Confusia her World Women's Title belt, which she's too tired to even get up to receive. She cradles it on the mat, as a replay of the move is played...

 

COLE

Look at how Ashley basically folds up upon the landing! That ain't right!

 

COACH

People are going to be looking back for decades to come at how revolutionary this division was to wrestling, and that'll be one of the visuals on the permanent highlight reel for sure!

 

The referees bring water bottles and ice packs into the ring for both wrestlers, as the crowd applauds both on a job well done!

 

COACH

Well, the girls have done it again! First we had the savage brawl that was Brodie Lewis versus Julie Sharcor and now six of the top female wrestlers alive come out and steal the show!

 

Confusia rolls out of the ring and goes down on all fours on the outside, with her newly-won title belt in front of her. The officials are having a hard time waking up Street, as Confusia crawls to the locker room, ripping off the athletic tape from her wrists to try and tape an ice pack to the back of her neck.

 

COLE

You've got to applaud the athleticism and tenacity of all six girls, but Confusia deserves a big thumbs up for finding a way to dethrone Ashley Street when no one else could!

 

COACH

I don't think she just dethroned her; I thinks she crippled her!

 

COLE

Oh, shut up! Ashley's moving her legs around slowly and we've gotten a thumbs-up finally from one of the officials in the ring, so she'll hopefully be just fine. In the meanwhile, I think we've got something going on in the locker room! Let's cut!

 

(We fade away from the arena to the visual of Confusia, finally standing, posing with her belt high above her head!)

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Rick Heyross walks into the drawing room, leading Team Heyross in.

 

RICK

OK, boys, let's see what the lucky numbers are!

 

Charlie Moss reaches into the tumbler, followed by Quentin Benjamin. Moss opens up his container, and Rick looks at his number and starts laughing evilly. Moss joins in on the laughter. Benjamin checks his number out, and is not quite as enthused. Team Heyross exchange glimpses at one another's numbers.

 

MOSS

Oh, come on, that's not bad! Not bad, at least, for the best pure athlete in the OAOAST.

 

Benjamin lightens up a bit.

 

BENJAMIN

You know, I heard about the Sooner Bruisers talking about getting a hotel for their family. Well, I hope they're having some champagne catered up there, too.

 

Moss gives Benjamin a strange look.

 

BENJAMIN

You know why? Because those two are going to have a lot of woes to drink away after we have our way with them out in that ring tonight.

 

MOSS

(laughs) And they better save some for Thursday night, after we knock them out of the Anderson Cup tournament.

 

Moss and Benjamin give each other a cross-hand five and leave the drawing room with their manager.

 

COLE

It'd be a whole lot easier to pick a winner in that Rumble match if we knew what numbers those guys were picking.

 

COACH

Yeah, but what would be the fun in that?

 

COLE

What a show so...wait, I'm being told something in my headset....WHAT? You found them?!?! Apparantly, Brodie Lewis and Julie Sharcor are STILL fighting, as a cameraman has caught up with them in the parking lot! Cut to it!

 

Cut to the parking lot, as Sharcor hurls Lewis into the back bumper of a white car! Sharcor goes for a hard thrust kick to the chest, but Brodie moves and Sharcor ends up breaking the latching on the trunk! Brodie stumbles over to the next car beside it and yanks off the side view mirror from the driver's side. Lewis walks over to "The Shark" and bashes it over her head! Sharcor's face becomes even bloodier, as she simply growls it off and goes nuts with a crazy series of E. Honda-like slaps to the face! Brodie shrugs them off and goes nuts with a series of headbutts to the forehead! Brodie follows up with a forearm, as Sharcor gives Brodie one of her own! These two start going back and forth with the forearms again! Out of nowhere, a group of officials and law enforcement barge in and start to break up the fight! But, right before they can get Brodie out of striking distance, she throws a STIFF AS FUCK right jaw that connects with Sharcor's jaw...and knocks her out COLD!

 

COLE

THE SHARK IS OUT! THE SHARK IS OUT!

 

The herd of non-wrestlers that came in to break up the party get Brodie away from Sharcor and pull her into the building. EMT's rush to the unconcious Sharcor.

 

(Cut back to Sofa Central)

 

COACH

Well, that match ended as a no-contest, but that was something! We finally found a weakness on the beast that is Julie Sharcor! She has a glass jaw!

 

COLE

I wouldn't necessarily say that, as she got pelted with a whole boatload of punches to the head during that match! And who knows how many punches connected during the portion of that fight that we didn't get to see! What I will say is that Brodie Lewis is street-born and street-bred, and with that comes the ability to punch someone's damn head off! She has an iron fist more than anyone has a "glass jaw!"

 

COACH

Nonetheless, Julie Sharcor was left LAYING for the first time ever, and boy was that a vicious shot or what?

 

COLE

It was a vicious fight, period! We had fans trampled, fans knocked out, cars damaged, and two completely and totally broken wrestlers!

 

("Wine, Women, & Song" by Harvey Danger starts up, as Sly Sommers comes out, wearing an all-black tuxedo. He rushes towards Sofa Central, where he grabs the house microphone)

 

SLY

Hi there. What a fight that was, huh? Who cares? I'm back! Since I don't have a match planned on this Pay-Per-View, I felt I should come out and give you all some verbage to live by. First off, you're wondering what's up with the new look. Well, what happened was this: I quit wrestling for a while because the drama got to me. In the mean-time, I moved to Michigan. I simply chill'axed and got a common-man job at Staples. Then, one fateful afternoon, I was in a gas station and picked up a lotto ticket. Low and behold, six hours later, I came into fifty-five million dollars. All mine, all mine, all mine! With the money, I started dressing to the nines, got rid of my silly, greasy long hair, and became the proud owner of the best-looking mustache in the world.

 

CROWD

Oooookay....

 

SLY

With that being said, I got something to lay out. You see, often in life, you see many who talk about doing stuff, but never do anything about it. Well children, I'm not one of those types. I'm gonna lead by example and be someone that all of you can look up to! See, I know I'm a better grappler than anyone in that locker room. I'm the best wrestler in the damn world! So, starting this Thursday, I'm issuing a weekly challenge to anyone on the face of the planet: face me in a wrestling match. That's it. If you beat me, I give you $100,000. If you don't, oh well. The best wrestler alive made your ass tap out with my new, sweet submission hold, the Double Slypass, which is that reverse swinging neckbreaker into the cobra clutch thingy. Either way, I don't care, for I'm on top of the damn world. Maestro, hit my music!

 

("Wine, Women, & Song" comes back on, as Sly throws down the microphone and struts back to the locker room.)

 

COLE

That was...well, nothing. Let's just get going with the next match.

COLE

What a match! Lets take a look at our February Pay Per View spectactular!

 

Sunday, February 26, OAOST Presents...

 

ZeroHourHG.jpg

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"OWWWWWWWWWW!"

 

"The Pyscho Gremlin" Frankie Frankensteiner bursts into the room, HOWLING at the ceiling and running around like a hyperactive child. Seconds later a shirtless and well-oiled up "Man of Tomorrow" Frank Frankensteiner enters the room.

 

FRANKIE

Just like ladies', baby brother's first.

 

Frankie reaches in and pulls out a container. Frank follows suit. They check their numbers at the same time. Frank takes a peak at his brother's drawing and does a double-take, losing his sunglasses.

 

FRANKIE

How'cha do, Frank?

 

FRANK

Not bad, little bro. Not bad. You?

 

FRANKIE

Heh. We better reserve a hotel for mom and dad. I gotta good feelin' about tonight.

 

Frank "accidently" bumps into his brother, causing Frankie to drop his number. Frank picks the number up and returns it to Frankie with a smile.

 

FRANK

Whoops. Sorry about that, bro. We better go reserve that hotel for ma and pops.

 

FRANKIE

Yeah. Let's go. OWWWWWWWWW!

 

COLE

Interesting characters there guys. Imagine if Frank Frankensteiner won the Lethal Rumble!

 

COACH

I'd rather not.

 

COLE

In any event, its time for our X-Division Championship match. Last month at Climax Parka and Jamie O'Hara fought for the X-Division Title and went to a draw. O'Hara made the case that he pinned Parka's shoulders to the mat, which he did, but his own shoulders were down for the count as well.

 

COACH

So says the ref, but I saw his shoulder come off the mat.

 

CABOOSE

And you're just now saying something about it?

 

COACH

It's not new info. Everyone saw it!

 

COLE

Regardless tonight O'Hara gets his rematch and we've been told that in the case of another draw the match will be ordered to continue. Both men requested this stipulation.

 

COACH

Good.

 

apfilmxtitle8ye.gif

 

BUFFER

Ladies and Gentlemen this match is scheduled for one fall and is for the X-Division Championship!

 

YEAHHHHHH!!!!

 

"Lose Yourself" by Eminem begins to play and the cheers turn to boos. Jamie O'Hara walks out onto the stage looking as smug as ever. He walks to the ring while taunting the fans.

 

O'HARA

Tonight is my night! Ain't no dirty ref gon take my title away this time.

 

O'Hara enters the ring and poses on the turnbuckles much to the chagrin of the fans.

 

BUFFER

Introducing first, the challenger. From Birmingham, England. He weighs in at 170 pounds. He is "The Birmingham Bad Boy"........JAMIE O'HARA!!!!!!

 

BOOOOOOO!!!!!

 

The music dies out.

 

CALIFORNIA LOVE!!!!!!

 

YEAHHHHH!!!!!

 

"California Love" by Dr. Dre and Tupac begins as the headlights appear in the entryway. The El Camino pulls out onto the stage as the fans rock to the music. Parka holds his title out the window and in the air for everyone to see before parking the car and exiting along with Eddy.

 

COLE

The fans are solidly behind Parka and I'm sure they too are glad that there will be no draw tonight.

 

Parka walks to the ring, high fiving the fans along the way, and then enters the ring. He removes his mask and hands it to Eddy before posing with the X-Title held high.

 

BUFFER

Introducing next. From San Diego, California, being accompanied to the ring by Eddy Kalm. He weighs in at 245 pounds. He is the reigning X-Division Champion.....THE PARKA!!!!!!

 

YEAHHHHH!!!!!

 

COLE

Here we go. It's put up or shut up time for O'Hara.

 

COACH

How about you shut up?

 

CABOOSE

How about we just call this match?

 

*DING DING DING*

 

Parka and Jamie come face to face and in the blink of an eye they lock up.

 

COLE

No wasted time here. These two don't need to feel each other out as they already know each other well.

 

Parka backs Jamie into a corner and goes to whip him across, but Jamie reverses straight into an Armdrag!

 

COLE

Geez! O'Hara pretty much used his momentum and just yanked Parka down to the mat!

 

COACH

He's pissed and he's ready to take that title.

 

Parka is up quickly and locks up again. Parka gains control, whips Jamie to the ropes, and catches him with a Jumping Leg Lariat on the way back. Parka wastes no time in heading to the apron and hitting a quick Slingshot Senton and going for a cover.

 

1

 

 

 

 

No!!

 

COLE

Both men are coming out swinging. Last time we had a bit of a wrestling display to start, but this time they are looking to hurt someone.

 

CABOOSE

My kind of match.

 

Parka meets a standing Jamie with a boot to the gut and nails a Snap Suplex before making another cover.

 

1

 

 

 

 

No!!

 

COACH

No dice Parka! You ain't putting O'Hara down that easy.

 

Parka waits for Jamie to get up and goes for a Clothesline to take him back down, but Jamie ducks under and bounces off the ropes. He quickly nails Parka from behind with a Dropkick that sends Parka throat first across the second rope on the other side. Jamie, seeing his opportunity, runs up Parka's back, leaps over the top rope, and snaps Parka's head across the rope on the way down.

 

COLE

And just like that O'Hara is in control.

 

COACH

He's too quick to take for granted.

 

Jamie climbs back on the apron and as Parka gets up Jamie nails a Springboard Corkscrew Cross Body for a pin.

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

No!!

 

COLE

Nice move by O'Hara. How do you combat moves like that?

 

COACH

You don't!

 

CABOOSE

You have to ground him in some way.

 

Jamie is up quick and Parka is up a couple of seconds later, but this gives Jamie enough time to leap onto Parka's shoulders in the Electric Chair position and nail an Inverted Hurricanrana!

 

COLE

My God Jamie just spiked Parka right on his head!!

 

COACH

Booyah!

 

CABOOSE

Oh God...

 

Jamie goes for another cover.

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

 

 

No!!!

 

COLE

I can't believe he kicked out.

 

Jamie comes up with a smirk on his face and mocks Parka by holding his head in pain and laughing. Parka gets up slow and Jamie whips him hard into the corner. Jamie runs in and leaps into a Spinning Wheel Kick, the momentum of which takes him over the top rope and he lands on his feet on the apron.

 

COLE

Parka's head was just snapped way back on that move.

 

CABOOSE

I think O'Hara is trying to break Parka's neck or something.

 

COACH

I told you he is pissed.

 

Jamie then springboards off the top rope, onto Parka's shoulders, and takes him over with a Hurricanrana! He then goes for another cover.

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

No!!

 

COACH

O'Hara is dominating!

 

COLE

I hate to agree with you, but you're right.

 

Parka slowly gets to his feet and looks groggy. Jamie then runs past him, runs up the turnbuckles, and comes off with a Moonsault to be followed by the Reverse DDT, but Parka side steps and Jamie lands on his feet. Parka uses the momentary disorientation by Jamie to nail him with a desparation Spear!

 

COLE

Parka found the opening he needed, but I think he used the last of his energy to do it.

 

COACH

Yeah he did. He ain't making a three off that.

 

CABOOSE

You might be right.

 

Parka takes a breather before finally making a cover.

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

No!!

 

Both men get up at the same time as Parka took a chance to rest. Jamie looks even more pissed and Parka looks ready to go. Both men start trading punches back and forth until Parka gets the upper hand. Parka then whips Jamie to the ropes and goes for a Samoan Drop when he comes back, but Jamie reverses it into a Crucifix Pin.

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

No!!!

 

COLE

O'Hara with the quick reversal.

 

COACH

Parka is just too old and slow for him!

 

CABOOSE

He's not that old. In fact he's still in his 20's!

 

COACH

Late 20's!!

 

Both men are up at the same time again and now both look pissed. Parka goes for a Clothesline, but Jamie ducks. Parka turns back around and right into a Dropkick from Jamie. Parka goes down and Jamie nails a Standing SSP for a pin.

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3!!

 

 

No!! Parka kicks out.

 

COLE

O'Hara almost had him there. I think he knocked the wind right out of Parka.

 

COACH

He's making Parka mad and making him make mistakes.

 

CABOOSE

Mistakes that are going to end up costing Parka his title if he's not careful.

 

Jamie pulls Parka to his feet and whips him to the ropes and as Parka bounces back Jamie bounces off the opposite ropes for the Moonsault Reverse DDT. He lands in position, but Parka twists his way out of it and behind Jamie so he can nail him with a Half Nelson Suplex!

 

COLE

Now it's Parka's turn to spike Jamie on his head!

 

COACH

Parka's trying to end O'Hara's career!

 

CABOOSE

And what was O'Hara doing earlier to Parka?

 

Parka goes for a cover.

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

 

 

 

 

3!!

 

No!! Jamie kicks out.

 

COLE

I can't believe it.

 

Parka waits for Jamie to start to move and then goes in for the kill. As Jamie reaches his knees Parka nails him with the Shining Wizard!

 

COLE

That could do it!

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3!!!

 

 

No!!! Jamie kicks out!!

 

COACH

No that's not it! Jamie is still in it!

 

CABOOSE

Okay Coach no need to yell.

 

Parka is back up and looking to finish the match as Jamie gets up even slower. Parka then grabs him and goes for a Vertical Suplex, but Jamie drops behind him and runs up the turnbuckles. Right as Parka turns around Jamie leaps off for a Moonsault Reverse DDT and finally hits it. He then makes a cover.

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3!!

 

No!!

 

COLE

These two men are throwing everything at each other and they're becoming exhausted.

 

COACH

Keep on him Jamie!

 

CABOOSE

You make me sick Coach.

 

Both men lie on the mat for a breather as the ref counts.

 

1....2....3.....4.....5.....6.....Jamie stands up....7.....8....Parka gets up.

 

Jamie goes for a Hurricanrana, but Parka shoves him off and Jamie backflips back to the mat. Parka then goes for a Clothesline, but Jamie ducks. As Parka passes him Jamie quickly nails him in the back of the head with a Spinning Heel Kick. With Parka dazed Jamie goes to the top rope and comes off for a Blockbuster, but Parka side steps and Jamie hits the mat hard.

 

COLE

No one was home!!

 

COACH

You'd think by now Parka wouldn't be that alert.

 

CABOOSE

You'd think so, but you're just wrong Coach.

 

Parka kicks Jamie in the gut as he goes to stand and then goes for the Day of the Dead.

 

COLE

Parka is looking to end this!

 

As Parka gets him up Jamie breaks free and brings Parka over with a Sunset Flip. However, Parka rolls through and nails a sitting Jamie in the face with a Dropkick! Parka then pulls Jamie into position and goes to the top rope.

 

COLE

Could we see Death from Above?

 

Parka goes for Death from Above (Shooting Star Double Stomp), but Jamie moves out of the way. Parka lands on his feet and after stumbling for a second he turns around to see Jamie running at him. Parka goes for a Back Body Drop, but Jamie manages to turn in the air and land on his feet behind Parka.

 

COLE

O'Hara seems to have a counter for everything.

 

COACH

That's because he's a smart man.

 

CABOOSE

Now only if he could sound smart when he talks.

 

Jamie acts quicly and nails Parka with a Bulldog before heading to the apron.

 

COLE

Now what is he doing?

 

Jamie waits for Parka to stand and then goes for a Springboard Somersault Seated Senton and hits it for a cover.

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

 

 

 

3!!

 

 

No!! Parka kicks out.

 

COLE

That was extremely close to a three count!

 

COACH

That was a three count! Come on!!

 

Jamie complains about the count to the ref, but the ref stands firm. Jamie then nails Parka with a quick Somersault Legdrop and goes up to the top.

 

COLE

I think Jamie is going for Da Bling Thing!

 

Jamie goes for Da Bling Thing (Shooting Star Legdrop), but Parka rolls out of the way and Jamie lands hard on his tailbone!

 

COLE

Ouch!!

 

CABOOSE

You said it.

 

Parka sees his opening and hooks Jamie for the Day of the Dead and hits it!

 

COLE

He got him!!!

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3!!!

 

*DING DING DING*

 

YEAHHHHHH!!!!!!

 

COACH

Dammit!!!

 

COLE

What a hard fought matchup by both men. Finally Parka has beaten O'Hara without controversy.

 

CABOOSE

So why do I have the feeling we still haven't heard the last of this?

 

Parka gets up and is handed the X Title, which he holds high above his head.

 

BUFFER

Here's your winner and still X-Division Champion....THE PARKA!!!!!!

 

"California Love" begins to play as the fans cheer, but Jamie comes to and looks pissed. Parka waits for O'Hara to stand and offers him a handshake, but O'Hara just stares at him and leaves the ring.

 

COLE

Oh come on he can't even shake his hand??

 

COACH

Parka hasn't earned a handshake.

 

CABOOSE

Give me a break.

 

Parka decides to not worry about O'Hara for the time being as he celebrates his win and then heads back to the El Camino with his title and Eddy.

 

COLE

We still have more to come including the 30 Man Rumble Match.

 

COACH

Both of these men are in that match so Caboose might be right about this not being over.

 

CABOOSE

Of course I'm right.

 

*We cut back to the drawing room*

 

Otaku walks into the drawing room, looking around. He sees Axel standing by the number dispensing thingamajiggie and walks right up to him, with Ayane now coming into view and following him.

 

Axel: Hello, mate, ready to get your number?

 

Otaku: Indeed I am, but know this…if I happen to be the one who eliminates Zack Malibu from the Rumble, you can take that money and donate it to charity, I don’t want your dirty money, SIR.

 

Axel: All right, mate, it’s your call. I hope you realize, though, that you’re going to be stuck in the midcard as long as Zack Malibu remains in the company. It’s to everyone’s benefit that he gets the tar kicked out of him.

 

Otaku: Mr. Axel, I came to the OAOAST from GCW, I trained under the Masked Marauder there, you might just have heard of him, as well as Strike, two men who’d be in the GCW Hall of Fame if the company hadn’t gone under. I was bathed in tradition from the get go, and you earned your spot. I’m going to do my same here, Mr. Axel, and if I don’t make it to the main event, it won’t be because of Zack Malibu playing politics.

 

Axel: Believe what you want to, mate, but get your number for now and get out.

 

Otaku nods and turns to Ayane.

 

Otaku: Kiss me good luck, hun?

 

Ayane: Of course!

 

Ayane kisses Otaku quickly and he goes and gets his number and peeks at it.

 

Otaku: Ayane-chan, you gave me some very good luck, thanks, dear!

 

Otaku hides his number before hugging Ayane and heading out of the room.

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APfilmRagsharps.jpg

 

BUFFER

“THE NEXT MATCH!...is scheduled for ONE FALL!!...and is a FALLS! COUNT! ANYWHERE MATCH!!”

 

-The fans erupt as the lights go out. The cheers slowly fade before...

 

 

 

“VIVAAAA LAS VEGAS!!”

 

CUE: “Bodies” by Sex Pistols

 

-The fans erupt as Jasmine steps through the curtain, dressed as a school-girl. She carries a Kendo Stick in one hand, and a water bottle in the other.

 

COACH

Sweet Sassy Molassy!!! SO HOT!!

 

COLE

Ragdoll isn’t even out yet, Coach...

 

CABOOSE

Oh my god, I bleedin’ knew it.

 

-The cheers grow louder still as Ragdoll steps through the curtain, carrying a chair. He wears his usual dirty clothes, only his shirt has blood stains on them. He and Jasmine smile at each other before they start walking down the ramp.

 

BUFFER

“Entering first, from LAS VEGAS, NEVADA!!! Weighing in at One Hundred and Sixty-Five Pounds! “The LIVING LEGEND OF LAS VEGAS”...AUSTIN!! “RAAAAAAAAAGDOLLLLLL”! BAAAAAAAAAKEEEEERRRRRR!!!

 

-The fans erupt as Ragdoll raises the chair....WHAM!!! The fans boo as Ragdoll flies forward, clutching the back of his head. Jasmine jumps back, her eyes wide with fear.

 

COLE

GUNNER SHARPS WITH A CHEAP SHOT!! WHAT A WAY TO RETURN!!

 

CABOOSE

It wasn’t a cheap shot, Cole...it was a SMART shot.

 

-Gunner smirks as he glares at Ragdoll, who is slowly getting to his feet. Gunner bends down and picks up the chair...Ragdoll is now up! Gunner rears back...WHACK!! The fans cheer as Gunner drops the chair and turns around, his eyes wide with anger. Jasmine rears back again...WHACK!! The second shot doesn’t faze Gunner at all, and he keeps stalking toward Jasmine, who rears back again...SWINGANDAMISS!~ Gunner clutches the Kendo stick in his monstrous hand and rips it away from Jasmine. He cracks his neck as she slowly walks backward...WHAM!!!!

 

COLE

RAGDOLL WITH THE CHAIR!~

 

-Gunner drops to a knee clutching the back of his head...Jasmine snatches the Kendo stick back from [email protected]~ WHAM!! [email protected][email protected] WHAM!! [email protected] The fans erupt as Ragdoll and Jasmine take turns hitting Gunner in the head with their respective weapons. The final shot...WHACK/[email protected]!~#[email protected][email protected][email protected]#~#[email protected][email protected][email protected][email protected]!

 

COACH

YO!~!

 

-Gunner finally collapses, falling face first to the ramp with a thunderous thud. Ragdoll smiles wide to the fans as he steps back a bit. Jasmine smiles as she dumps some water on Gunner’s head, causing him to slightly wake up. He slowly starts to stand as Jasmine walks towards Ragdoll, running her hand down his chest before gripping his dolls. The crowd laughs along with Ragdoll as his wife turns and looks at him with a sexy grin.

 

COLE

I think we know what’s happening tonight if Ragdoll wins.

 

CABOOSE

If he loses too...someone has to tend to his wounds.

 

-Gunner is now on his feet, and Ragdoll raises the chair...Gunner turns...WH-NO!~ Gunner ducks under the chairshot, causing Ragdoll to spin around. Gunner quickly grabs Ragdoll by the waist and hoists him up, manuevering him into a powerbomb position...

 

COLE

Oh no...Is Gunner going to powerbomb Ragdoll on the ramp?!

 

-The fans start screaming as Gunner turns towards...the FANS!~ The people in the first three rows scatter as Gunner runs forward...AND HE TOSSES RAGDOLL!~ [email protected]!~!~

 

COLE

OH MY GOD!!

 

COACH!!

RAGDOLL, IN MID-AIR, HIT GUNNER IN THE HEAD WITH THE CHAIR!!

 

-CRASH!~!~! Ragdoll goes limp amidst the chairs, which are damn near destroyed from the powerbomb!

 

FANS

“HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT!!”

 

-Gunner falls backward, clutching his forehead, which is now slowly dripping blood. Jasmine quickly takes off her heels and hops down the ramp. She quickly climbs over the railing and runs to Ragdoll. She kneels down beside him and starts slapping him slightly, trying to get him to wake up.

 

COLE

My God...Ragdoll is DEAD...this match is as good as done. The “All Guns Blazing” straight into the third row...

 

COACH

Keep in mind, Cole, that Ragdoll has kicked out of worse, and seeing as he took out Gunner with that chairshot, I think Ragdoll is still in this match.

 

-Gunner slowly starts to stand as he touches his forehead. He pulls his hand away and sees his blood. His eyes match the color. Gunner turns his head towards Ragdoll, who is slowly starting to stir, then quickly turns his eyes to Jasmine. Jasmine looks at Gunner, catching his eye, and lets out a shriek. She starts shaking Ragdoll trying to wake him up, but to no avail. Gunner slowly starts walking towards her, almost stalking her. Jasmine looks around, then takes off running. Gunner takes off, as well, chasing Jasmine towards the ring. Jasmine slides in, and is quickly pulled out by Gunner, who grabs her by the hair. He slowly turns her around and glares into her frightened eyes.

 

GUNNER

“HE’S OUT! YOU’RE NEXT!”

 

-With those terrifying words, Gunner grabs Jasmine by the throat, causing the fans to go into a state of shock.

 

COLE

HE ISN’T...HE ISN’T GOING TO CHOKESLAM HER ON THE OUTSIDE, IS HE?!

 

-Gunner smiles a sadistic smile...before HOISTING JASMINE UP!! The fans are damn near rioting, trying to get Gunner to not chokeslam the poor girl...CRASH!~!

 

COLE

NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!!!

 

-Jasmine bounces off the mats and immediately goes into the fetal position. Gunner laughs as he turns slowly...WHAM!!

 

COLE

RAGDOLL’S UP!! A WELL-DESERVED SEARCH AND DESTROY FOR GUNNER!!

 

-Gunner collapses as the fans erupt. Ragdoll quickly grabs Gunner by the head...WHAM!! WHAM!! WHAM!! WHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAM!!! Absolutely devastating knees to the head deepen the cut on Gunner’s forehead, causing the fans to go absolutely insane.

 

COLE

Ragdoll...We haven’t seen this side of Ragdoll in a long time...my God...

 

-Ragdoll continues delivering the knees, screaming.

 

RAGDOLL

“YOU SICK FUCK!! DON’T YOU EVER TOUCH HER AGAIN!! DON’T YOU EVER TOUCH ANY MEMBER OF MY FAMILY AGAIN, YOU SON OF A BITCH!! I’LL KILL EVERYBODY YOU HAVE EVER CARED ABOUT!!

 

-Ragdoll drops Gunner and quickly moves to Jasmine. He picks her up gently and begins to carry her up towards the back. He’s fighting back tears as he whispers “I’m sorry, baby” and “You’ll be ok” into her ear.

 

CABOOSE

What the hell? He could pin Gunner right now! What’s he doing?

 

COLE

Ragdoll doesn’t care about the match right now, ‘Boose. His first priority as of right now is his WIFE!

 

-Ragdoll disappears behind the curtain for a few moments as Gunner slowly pulls himself up. The fans erupt as Ragdoll comes back out from behind the curtain, shouting random obscenities at Gunner. In his right hand is an already shattered bottle. In the other, a crowbar. Gunner slightly comes to, looks at Ragdoll, and smiles a sadistic smile. He makes a “Bring It” motion with his hand, causing the fans to erupt and rise to their feet. The two gladiators are now stalking towards one another, Ragdoll still shouting obscenities.

 

COLE

This is going to be absolutely brutal...this is going to be sick...

 

COACH

This is going to be great!!

 

-Ragdoll quickly takes off his shirt, revealing a body covered in both scars and tattoos. He points to his heart, where “Jasmine” is tattooed. Ragdoll screams more at Gunner as the two are almost face to face...

 

 

 

 

Ragdoll, suddenly, tosses the crowbar to Gunner, who catches it in his right hand. The two stare each other down...BEFORE RAGDOLL CHARGES!! Gunner swings the crowbar with all his might...MISS!! Ragdoll uses his incredible speed to dodge the bullet. They both turn at the same time...AND RAGDOLL STABS GUNNER IN THE HAND!! Gunner screams as he drops the crowbar, causing the fans to go apey!

 

COLE

...EW!

 

-Ragdoll quickly pounces, delivering swift kicks to Gunner’s chest and ribs. Gunner, meanwhile, tries his hardest to both cover his ribs and cover his hand. Ragdoll then drops to his knees...and hands Gunner the bottle? Gunner looks at Ragdoll oddly as the Vegas Legend screams at him to stab him back. Gunner glares at Ragdoll, who is puffing out his chest. Gunner lets out a scream as he swipes at Ragdoll...

 

 

 

WHO DODGES!! GUNNER’S HAND BARELY MISSES RAGDOLL! Ragdoll quickly gets to his feet, and just as Gunner’s hand is at it’s lowest [email protected]~#[email protected]

 

FANS/SOFA CENTRAL

OHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

 

COLE

RAGDOLL JUST CRUSHED GUNNERS HAND ON THAT BOTTLE!!

 

-Gunner lets out a blood-curdling scream as he wriths in pain. Ragdoll drops to his knees slowly as the fans start chanting...

 

FANS

“YOU’RE FUCKED UP! YOU’RE FUCKED UP!!”

 

-Ragdoll smiles wide as he glares at Gunner.

 

COLE

You just know that Ragdoll is coming up with sick and demented things to do right now.

 

CABOOSE

No doubt about it.

 

-Ragdoll then quckly stands, grabbing Gunner by the ears. He slowly lifts him up...WHAM!! A vicious headbutt sends Gunner’s head backwards, blood now pouring from his forehead, hands, and nose. WHAM!! Another headbutt causes Gunner to drop to one knee, and the fans know what this means. Their cheers grow as Ragdoll backs up a little bit...and RUSHES FORWARD!! He leaps in the air, a good four feet from Gunner, who looks up just in [email protected]!!~!~!

 

COLE

DEVIL DOLL! DEVIL DOLL!! DEVIL DOLL!!!

 

-The fans erupt as Ragdoll stands slowly, smiling. He shakes his head, shouting, “I’M NOT DONE YET, BITCHES!!” The fans around him cheer louder as he struts up the ramp, walking toward the curtain. He disappears for a second...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And collapses, blood now rushing from his head.

 

COLE

What the...What just happened?

 

COACH

Did he hit his head on something?

 

-The fans grow silent as Ragdoll clutches at his head, mouthing, “You son of a bitch...son of a bitch...” Suddenly, a barbed wire wrapped 2 X 4 juts out from behind the curtain. More and more of it appear before we see....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

49169362_fe2c718141_m.jpg

KEN BAKER!!!

 

COLE

WHAT ON EARTH?!

 

-Ken slowly struts out, greeted by earth-shattering boos. He wears torn jeans, black leather jacket...and an “Upstarts” shirt...

 

CABOOSE

YES! YES!!

 

COACH

THE UPSTARTS HAVE FOUND THEIR TRUMP CARD!!!

 

-Ken smirks at the fans as he grabs his brother by his greasy hair and lifts him to a standing position. Ken drops the 2 X 4...and positions Ragdoll for the Money Clip!!

 

COLE

No...no...please, if there is a God, don’t let him do this...

 

-The boos grow louder as Ken positions himself and Ragdoll over the weapon. He gives on final smirk before leaping into the air...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CRASH!!!~!

 

The fans are almost rioting again as Ken slowly stands. He slowly picks Ragdoll up and begins dragging him over towards the still unconcious Gunner. The curtain opens again, revealing none other than Axel, flanked by Josie Baker...and A.J. Flaire. Both Josie and AJ wear Upstarts t-shirts, and Axel is in a suit and tie. The three start walking towards Ken, who drapes Gunner’s arm over the near dead Ragdoll. Axel orders the ref to count. The ref drops...

 

 

 

1!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2!!!

 

 

 

 

 

3!!!

 

 

DING DING DING!!

 

BUFFER

“The winner of the match!! GUNNNNNNNNNNERRRRRRRRR SHARPS!!!”

 

-The boos are off the charts as AJ and Ken pick Gunner up. Gunner’s eyes are completely glazed over.

 

COLE

GUNNER SHARPS DOESN’T EVEN KNOW WHERE HE IS!!! THIS IS A DAMN TRAVESTY!! RAGDOLL GOT ROBBED!!

 

CABOOSE

Shut the hell up, Micheal! Ragdoll should have just played it safe and pinned Gunner! Instead, he let his emotions for his bitch get the best of him, and that’s what led to his downfall! There is no-one to blame here but Ragdoll!

 

-Josie hands Axel a microphone as he steps over the bloody Ragdoll. Axel stands over him triumphant. He raises the mic to his lips as he slowly leans down.

 

AXEL

“Austin?...If you can hear me, I’d like to introduce you to the three NEWEST acquisitions to The Upstarts roster...Your sister-in-law, Josie...the Godfather to your newborn son, AJ Flaire...and none other than your flesh-and-blood...Ken...FUCKING...Baker. I have now, OFFICIALLY, taken this “thing” between you and I...and made it a family affair.”

 

-Axel drops the mic as “Eat You Alive” hits the PA system. Ken and AJ help Gunner to the back, as Axel escorts Josie, leaving Ragdoll lifeless on the rampway. EMT’s rush out past them towards Ragdoll.

 

COLE

This...this is just too much for me...The Upstarts now have two former X Champions and one of the best managers in the industry on their side...

 

CABOOSE

This is a great time for the Upstarts. Great time.

 

COACH

I agree FULLY!

 

COLE

Fans...we’ll be right back...

 

******************************************

 

Looking sharpe in a tan suit TONY BRANNIGAN enters the drawing room, making eye contact with no one. Without hesitation he digs in and pulls out a small plastic circular container. He opens the container and takes out the piece of paper with his Lethal Rumble number inside. The former World Champion cracks a smile and looks up to the camera.

 

TONY

Looks like I'm halfway to AngleMania and regaining the title that was robbed from me. *smooch*

 

*Fade back to ring*

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COLE

Well folks, its just about time for our Twenty-Four Seven Championship match of the evening. But what a night it has been so far. The New, New Midnight Express are Three time Tag Team Champions, Confusia is the Women's Champion, and we just witnessed the return of two of the greatest X-Division Champions of all time, Ken Baker, and AJ Flaire. We've still got more to come, but we've also got more Lethal Rumble drawings. I'm being told that the Heavenly Rockers are just about to pick their entry numbers.

 

(We're whisked backstage to HD GM Axel's office where the man himself is positioned with interviewer Tony Schiavone. Situated between the two is the Lethal Rumble tumbler containing entry numbers for this years highly anticipated match.)

 

AXEL

Who's next?

 

TONY SCHIAVONE

(reading his list)

Wahoo McDaniel.

 

AXEL

I thought he was dead.

 

TONY

Oh. Well, I'll cross him off the list then. Um, next up we have Craven Moorhead...damn it! That's the last time I let the Sk8er Boiz draw up the list. Okay, next we have Logan Mann and Synth Eszier.

 

(On cue, The Sin City duo strolls into the neatly organized office. Both men wear ripped up jeans and tattered black Rolling Stones t-shirts. Their appearance on screen scores a large pop from the arena audience.)

 

AXEL

Logan and Synth, how are you doing? Tony, I'm not any good at the meaningless chit-chat part of the job, so go ahead and say something to ease the awkwardness, eh.

 

TONY

Uh...you guys like music right? Did I ever tell you about that time I went to that REO Speedwagon concert, and I almost made out with this girl who was a dead ringer for Diana Ross. Except for the fact that this girl was Asian, and fat, and had one leg. And it wasn't a girl at all actually......

 

SYNTH

Ya've only told us about it one billion times.

 

AXEL

I think hearing it once might be a bit too much for me.

 

(Fuming, Logan kicks the table where the tumbler is located.)

 

LOGAN

Jesus, can we just draw our damn numbers? Why are we even here? This really is corporate inefficiency at it's most glaring. Couldn't we have done this whole thing online? You can do anything on the Internet.

 

SYNTH

Uh-uh. Can ya fly ta Romulus home of the Romulan empire on the Internet?

 

TONY

That'd be boss if you could.

 

LOGAN

Of course you can't, Synth.

 

SYNTH

Ahz rests mah case! Wut's the hurry, L-Mann? You got some tail waiting for you back on the tour bus or sumthing? Be cool and be easy, mah ice mocha brudda. That girl ain't going no wheres. You a rock supa-star! Sho, she might be a lil upset you late, but when you hit the hotel room, all you'll need to do is say your name and you'll have that chicks panties 'round her ankles.

 

LOGAN

I've got a girlfriend, who I promised I'd call at this exact moment, but I can't because I'm dicking around here waiting for you to draw your stupid little number so I can go on and get up outta here.

 

TONY

Okay, well, let's get this party started. Huh guys? That sounded pretty hip, am I right? Tony S's still got it, eh.

 

(As Axel groans in the background, Tony commences a fast turn of the lethal tumbler. Synth patiently waits to pull out his number, carefully considering which life alerting container he should chose. After much deliberation and an order to “hurry the hell up, doofus” from Logan, Synth, hands soaked with nervous sweat, pulls out a container.)

 

SYNTH

Come on numba thirty!

 

LOGAN

Tiffany, don't you pay any attention to what goes on here? Number thirty already got won by that dude who's nailing that chick you kept trying to score with. There's no way you can get it. If you somehow get number thirty, I'll French kiss Michael Cole.

 

SYNTH

.......Come on numba thirty!

 

(With great anxiousness Synth slowly peers at his draw. His face brightens with wondrous joy when he sees what number he's acquired.)

 

SYNTH

HA-HA-HA! EAT MY ASS, LOGAN MANN! I'M MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE, BABAAAAAY! Where ya shit talking at now, Logan? Hey Ax, what comes before Part B?

 

AXEL

Part A?

 

SYNTH

Yeaaaaaauh! Dat's what the Synth-a-nator is gonnna go do! Ah got some jailbait to nail! See ya'll dudes on da witness stand! Deal wit dat ya'll mutha'fuckas!

 

(Lucky draw firmly in hand, Synth glides out of the room, singing TNT by ACDC.)

 

TONY

Ho-ho, he cracks me up. What a character!

 

LOGAN

He..he..I mean..number thirty isn't in there. Correct? I..I..I'm not gonna kiss Cole. I don't go in for that sort of thing. I know what you read in the tabloids, but that same tabloid also said an eighty year old man in Montreal gave birth to a three hundred pound Condor. So come on now, we all know Condor's can't get that big. Lemme just get my number and we can forget all about that Cole kissing bit.

 

(Unlike Synth, who treated this as a matter of life and death, Logan casually reaches in and pulls a container. His apathetic expression soon morphs into one of total confusion when he looks at his draw.)

 

LOGAN

What the hell? This isn't a number! This is a voucher for a free lap dance at Busty Leroux's palace of sin and lust!

 

TONY

Hmmm....I, uh, wonder how that got in there. Heh-heh. Why don't I just hold onto it for posterity's sake? Go ahead and pick again. It'll be Logan's pick, the remix. See that's funny, because you're a rockstar. Remix? Music? Rockstar? That's funny to me.

 

(After a heavy sigh, Logan digs into the tumbler once more. This time he pulls up a draw that makes him wish he would've stuck with the free lap dance.)

 

LOGAN

No way! Gimme a redo!

 

TONY

Sorry, Logan. No mulligans here, my Mann. Heh. That was kind of funny. M-a-n-n instead of the typical M-a-n.

 

LOGAN

Do you know who I am? Do you know who I know? I've gone from the AM to the PM with Christina Milan, hit Britney one more time, got drrty with Christina, holla backed at Gwen Stefani, checked on Beyonce, kicked Hillary Duff outta bed because she was so yesterday, and Kylie Minogue still can't get me out of her head. My loving is all she thinks about. But hey, you want me at this number? That's fine. Let's do it that way, Axel. Tony Schiavone, Anglemania will be the day the heavens rock, because Logan Mann's LP will be going double gold, first as a tag team champion, and then as the hardest rocking world champion this fed has ever seen!

 

(Determination lining his face, Mann exits the room)

 

AXEL

Rockers? What's next, Doctors?

 

TONY

We have those too.

 

AXEL

I must get my hands on that 'Best of Tag Division' tape.

 

TONY

Done.

 

******************************

apfilm2472zx.gif

 

The matchup graphic for Tha Puerto Rican/Colombian Heat 24/7 Championship Match is shown. “Step Up” by Drowning Pool plays in the background. The crowd cheers loudly, greatly anticipating the next match.

 

COLE

And now, coming up next is a match that is eight years in the making! The 24/7 Title will be on the line, as two FORMER best friends, “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat, square off, one-on-one!

 

COACH

Aw yeah! It’s go time, baby! Tha Puerto Rican, the GREATEST 24/7 Champion in OAOAST history is going to shut up that loudmouth Colombian Heat once and for all! PRL is going to prove that Heat rode on his coattails during the six years they were friends.

 

CABOOSE

PRL and Colombian Heat were NEVER friends. You heard what PRL said. He only hung out with Heat because he felt sorry for him. Well, PRL no longer pities Heat. Tonight, he wants to HURT Heat and retain his 24/7 Title!

 

COLE

Tha Puerto Rican will defend the 24/7 Championship, the belt he has held since April 7, 2005, a record 9 months and counting. Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat certainly have a long history with each other. At one time, these two men were the best of friends. And now, they are the worst of enemies. Let’s take a look at the tale of the tape!

 

Subway: Eat Fresh! presents The OAOAST Tale Of The Tape! ™

 

Tha Puerto Rican

 

Nicknames: The Corporate Champion, The P.R. Menace

Height: 5’9”

Weight: 220 lbs.

Age: 26

Years Pro: 9

Finishing Moves: Corporate Nightmare, Corporate Smackdown

Fast Facts: Current OAOAST 24/7 Champion, Three-Time Puerto Rican/Italian/Puerto Rican Champion, Former North American Champion, Leader of The Lightning Crew

 

Colombian Heat

 

Height: 6’0”

Weight: 180 lbs.

Age: 22

Years Pro: 7

Finishing Move: Colombian Necktie

Fast Facts: Former Second-In-Command of The Lightning Crew, PRL’s Former Best Friend, Idolizes Flavor Flav of Public Enemy

 

COLE

Colombian Heat has the height and speed advantage, in addition to the fact that The Lightning Crew will be banned from ringside during the duration of this contest. But Tha Puerto Rican is more ring savvy than Heat. He has “ring smarts” if you will, which is due to the fact that PRL has wrestled just a little bit longer than Heat. PRL also has more moves in his arsenal, but the most important factor in this match is that PRL and Colombian Heat used to be friends. BEST friends infact. So, they must know each other’s moves so well that it could hurt the both of them in this match!

 

COACH

Colombian Heat may *think* he knows everything Tha Puerto Rican will throw at him, but he is wrong. I’m sure Puerto will bust out a move he has never used before to surprise Heat. That will catch Heat off guard, and the match will soon be over!

 

COLE

Well, we’ll see about that. Folks, we are live in Toronto, Canada for Anglepalooza 2006! And it is now, at long last, time for the OAOAST 24/7 Title Match! Two former best friends will collide! Colombian Heat and Tha Puerto Rican! Who will come out on top? Let’s go to Michael Buffer right now for the ring introductions!

 

The camera cuts to Michael Buffer standing in the ring with a microphone in his right hand.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

MICHAEL BUFFER

Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall with a sixty-minute time limit, and is for the One And Only AngleSault Thread Twenty-Four/Seven Championship! During the duration of this match, The Lightning Crew will be banned from ringside except for Vitamin X!

 

CABOOSE

Okay! Here we go! Its Showtime, folks!

 

A piano plays a melody, causing the crowd to cheer. The lights go down in the arena, turning back on in tune with the melody.

 

DMX

COME ON!

 

*KA-BOOM~!*

 

“YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!”

 

Pyro explodes, leaving behind fire that burns on both sides of the entrance. “Gasolina (Remix)” by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil’ Jon and Pitbull starts playing. Colombian Heat comes out, firing the crowd up. He runs to both sides of the entrance, “raising the roof” with his hands. The crowd cheers. Heat raises his hands, acknowledging the fans, and then points to the ring. He makes the “I-want-the-belt” hand gesture, and then walks to the ring, slapping hands with the fans along the way.

 

BUFFER

Introducing first. The challenger. Originally from Bogotá, Colombia, but now residing in Miami, Florida. Weighing in at 180 lbs. He…is…COLOMBIANNNNNNNNNN HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!

 

Heat continues his walk to the ring, slapping hands with the fans along the way as “Gasolina (Remix)” continues playing.

 

COLE

Colombian Heat is the challenger for the 24/7 Title, but guys, perhaps for these two men, about to engage in combat, it’s even more important than being the 24/7 Champion.

 

CABOOSE

You’re right about that, Cole. It’s about proving who is simply better. And, I may not be a fortuneteller, but I already know the answer to that question: It’s Tha Puerto Rican who is the superior athlete!

 

COLE

Colombian Heat is one of the most charismatic, most unique superstars in the OAOAST today. But none of that matters in the ring. Heat must rely on his wrestling talent, and ONLY his wrestling talent if he wants to win this match and become 24/7 Champion!

 

COACH

And since Heat has NO wrestling talent, he won’t win!

 

Colombian Heat hops into the ring. He gets on the second rope and does the “WESTSIIIIIIIDE” hand signal, drawing a pop from the crowd. Heat then gets on a second turnbuckle, and throws up the “W” hand signal again, receiving more cheers.

 

COACH

These guys may have fought each other in the past, but this is the biggest match between these two! These two men have been, at one time, close like brothers, but any inkling of a friendship has vanished. Now, eight years after they first met, we will finally see Tha Puerto Rican prove once and for all that he is better than Colombian Heat! After eight years, it has come to this!

 

Colombian Heat gets off the second turnbuckle, and grabs a microphone.

 

COLE

This match is very personal! This is about more than the 24/7 Title!

 

COLOMBIAN HEAT

CUT THE DAMN MUSIC!

 

“Gasolina (Remix)” by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil’ Jon and Pitbull dies down. The crowd starts cheering again. Colombian Heat looks at the fans who are chanting his name. He smiles in amazement.

 

“HEAT!

HEAT!

HEAT!

HEAT!”

 

COLE

Colombian Heat can’t believe the response of this crowd!

 

COLOMBIAN HEAT

Toronto, Canada…

 

(Cheap Pop!)

 

HEAT

If all of y’all are ready to see me make Tha Puerto Rican feel the Heat and become the next 24/7 Champion, then make some noise UP IN THIS BI-AAAAATCH~!!!

 

The crowd makes some noise up in this BI-AAAAATCH~!!!

 

CABOOSE

I need to puke.

 

HEAT

Naw, naw, naw. I didn’t hear you. I saids, if all of y’all are ready to see me make Tha Puerto Rican feel the Heat and become the next 24/7 Champion and lay the smackdown on his candy ass, then make some damn noise UP IN THIS…

 

CROWD

BI-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATCH~!!!

 

The crowd cheers louder this time. Colombian Heat has a satisfied grin on his face.

 

HEAT

Hells yeah. You know how we do.

 

Colombian Heat puts the microphone away. The crowd is fired up, anticipating Heat’s opponent. Heat looks to the entrance.

 

CABOOSE

I like how Heat is convincing himself that he is going to win. He is so delusional! PRL is going to slap him back into reality.

 

The lights go down in the arena. The crowd actually pops for that! A Puerto Rican flag appears on the AngleTron. In big white blocky letters, the following words appear on the screen, with Tha Puerto Rican saying them:

 

*THE CHAMP IS HERE!*

 

“YEEEEEAAAAAHHH!”/”BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

 

With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and “Know Your Role ‘99” begins playing, with the crowd standing up and booing. PR is heard saying, “THE CHAMP IS HERE!” throughout the song, while smoke fills up the entryway and the lights flicker on and off in the entrance. A few seconds elapsed, and out from the curtains and through the smoke comes “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican and Vitamin X. The crowds’ boos get louder. PR looks at the crowd in disgust, jawing with some fans. He looks at Vitamin X, who has a smug look on his face, and the two of them turn towards the entrance. PRL tells someone to come on out. The person does come out, and the crowd greets this person with a mix of boos and cheers. That person? Stephen Joseph Popick!

 

COLE

Hey! Wait a minute! He’s not supposed to be out here!

 

COACH

Yeah! The Lightning Crew is banned from ringside!

 

CABOOSE

Well, technically, Popick ISN’T a member of The Lightning Crew. He’s PRL’s “Career Consultant” and manager, but he is NOT a member of The Lightning Crew, so he’s actually allowed to be out here.

 

COLE

But this still isn’t right!

 

PR high fives Popick. He places his custom made spinner 24/7 Championship belt over his left shoulder and spins the belt plate. PR looks at Popick and Vitamin X, who are both wearing suits, and tells them to follow him to the ring. PR, Popick, and Vitamin X walk to the ring as “Know Your Role ‘99” continues playing.

 

BUFFER

And his opponent. Accompanied to the ring by the Financial Consultant of The Lightning Crew, Vitamin X, AND his manager and “Career Consultant” Stephen Joseph Popick. From San Juan, Puerto Rico. Weighing in at 220 lbs. He is the leader of The Lightning Crew AND the One And Only AngleSault Thread Twenty-Four/Seven Champion, “The Corporate Champion” THA PUERTOOOOOOOOOO RICAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!

 

PR, Popick, and VX continue walking to the ring, all three of them have smug looks on their faces.

 

COLE

On February 11, 1998, Tha Puerto Rican, who at the time was wrestling as The Lightning Kid, met Colombian Heat backstage at an IWA event in Puerto Rico. The two became best friends. On October 7, 2003, Colombian Heat debuted in the OAOAST, and joined The Lightning Crew on IntenseZone helping PRL, who was then known as Puerto Rican Lightning; defeat “Shooter” Jay Darring to retain the OAOAST North American Title. On April 29, 2004, Tha Puerto Rican kicked Colombian Heat out of The Lightning Crew. On May 23, 2004, Tha Puerto Rican defeated Colombian Heat in an Empty Arena Match with help from Stephen Joseph. And now, on Sunday, January 29, 2006, at OAOAST Anglepalooza, “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican will meet Colombian Heat one-on-one in the ring for the OAOAST 24/7 Championship!

 

CABOOSE

Colombian Heat is lucky he was even in the presence of Tha Puerto Rican. PRL spent SIX YEARS carrying Colombian Heat on his back just because he felt sorry for him! That took a lot of effort, so kudos to PR for dealing with Heat for that long!

 

COLE

I refuse to believe PRL didn’t feel any genuine connection with Heat. Heat looked up to PRL. He considered him his “brother from another mother”. These two men traveled up and down the road together, united. Don’t tell me PRL didn’t think of Heat as his best friend!

 

CABOOSE

He didn’t! He considered him a “charity case”. Nothing more. Nothing less!

 

Tha Puerto Rican gets on the ring apron. He sneers at the crowd. Popick holds the ropes, and PR, wearing Puerto Rican flag facepaint, enters the ring. He spins around; soaking in the fans’ boos while “Know Your Role ‘99” continues playing over the P.A. system. Tha Puerto Rican does the HBK-muscle pose while pyro goes off behind him. The crowd is still booing and chanting, “P.R. SUCKS!” PRL heads to a second turnbuckle and raises his spinner 24/7 Championship belt over his head. He does the same pose on another second turnbuckle.

 

CABOOSE

THIS is how a Champion enters the ring! Tha Puerto Rican is exactly what a 24/7 Champion should be. He’s talented, he’s charismatic, he’s handsome, he’s well endowed. He’s the total package!

 

COLE

Did you just say well endowed?

 

PR hits a third second turnbuckle, and raises his custom made spinner 24/7 Championship belt with his right arm in the air and “smells the electricity” a’la The Rock. PRL does the same Rock pose on the fourth second turnbuckle, receiving boos. Tha Puerto Rican gets off the second turnbuckle, removes his sunglasses and earring on his left ear, and chats with Popick and VX while the lights go back on in the arena. He hands the earring and sunglasses to a ring attendant. Heat is still staring at PRL.

 

COLE

Is time winding down on PRL’s 24/7 Title reign? Are we 5, 10, 15, maybe 20 minutes away from seeing the end of Tha Puerto Rican’s record breaking 24/7 Title reign?

 

PRL high fives both Popick and Vitamin X, who wish him good luck. They leave the ring. P.R. turns his attention to Colombian Heat. The two men stand only a few feet away from each other, separated by Mickey Jay. PRL kisses his custom made spinner 24/7 Championship belt and hands it over to Mickey Jay. “Know Your Role ‘99” dies down. The crowd buzzes in anticipation of the match beginning.

 

CABOOSE

Someone should start a “Puerto’s gonna kill you.” chant. Who’s with me?

PUERTO’S GONNA KILL YOU!

PUERTO’S GONNA KILL YOU!

PUERTO’S GONNA KILL YOU!

PUERTO’S--

 

COLE

Enough.

 

Mickey Jay shows the belt to Colombian Heat. Heat touches the belt. Mickey Jay raises PRL’s spinner 24/7 Title belt over his head to let the crowd know this is a 24/7 Championship Match. He gives the belt to a ring attendant, who gives it to the timekeeper. The crowd chants, “HEAT! HEAT!” Mickey Jay pats down PRL and then Colombian Heat. He then calls for the bell.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

OAOAST 24/7 CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH

“THE CORPORATE CHAMPION” THA PUERTO RICAN (Champion with Stephen Joseph Popick and Vitamin X) vs. COLOMBIAN HEAT (Challenger)

(The Lightning Crew is banned from ringside for the duration of this match.)

PRL and Colombian Heat stare each other down. They start the trash talking.

 

COLE

And so, it’s come down to this. Eight years in the making for this match.

 

CABOOSE

Based on the entrances alone, I gotta give a little bit of the psychological advantage to Tha Puerto Rican! He’s getting things started. He’s psyching out Colombian Heat right now, if you ask me.

 

PRL and Heat are getting angrier by the second. The trash talking becomes heated (no pun intended). Both men’s faces are red. They are now nose-to-nose.

 

COLE

Look at PRL and Colombian Heat! They look like they will explode at any second!

 

PR and CH finally lockup. They jockey for position, neither men moving. PR grabs a headlock on Heat. He tightens the hold, taunting Heat at the same time. He punches Heat in the forehead, and then grabs him and gives him a Russian Legsweep.

 

COLE

And PRL strikes first blood in this match!

 

Vitamin X and Popick root PRL on. Puerto grabs Heat’s right arm and lifts him up. He gives Heat several shoulderblocks. PRL then applies a hammerlock on Colombian Heat. PRL tightens the hold.

 

PRL

Yeah! You like that? Huh? You LIKE THAT?

 

Colombian Heat reverses the hammerlock into one of his own! The crowd cheers. PRL reverses Heat’s hammerlock back to his hammerlock. But Heat reverses THAT and gets a hammerlock again, and turns it into a headlock. Puerto Rican tries to escape, but Colombian Heat has the headlock locked on tight. Puerto elbows Heat in his right thigh. He does this several times, and then shoves CH into the ropes. He fires back with a shoulderblock. Puerto bounces off the ropes, Heat leapfrogs over him (!), and then does an AJ Styles-like dropkick to PRL’s face!

 

COLE

And now Colombian Heat is on offense!

 

Vitamin X goes to the ring apron, but Colombian Heat stops him. Heat glares at him angrily. X saids he wasn’t going to do anything. CH grabs PRL’s left arm and applies an arm-bar on it. The crowd cheers Heat on. Heat taunts PRL while applying the armbar.

 

COACH

How dare Colombian Heat do this? Trash talk PRL! He should be ashamed!

 

COLE

Why? There’s nothing wrong with this.

 

COACH

Yes there is.

 

A little bit of PRL’s Puerto Rican flag facepaint has disappeared. PRL gets to his feet, and tries to run, but Heat stops him by not letting go of the armbar. PRL tries to run again, but Heat won’t let him. Heat stops him, and then kicks him squared in the balls!

 

PUERTO RICAN

Oh! Mother…

 

COACH

He should be disqualified! He should be disqualified for that!

 

Colombian Heat applies the armbar, but then PRL scratches him in his eyes to finally escape. Both men get up. PRL picks up where he left off, laying the smackdown on Colombian Heat with Rock-style punches to the temple. But then, Colombian Heat grabs PRL and throws him into the turnbuckle! Heat unleashes a combination of punches and chops to Tha Puerto Rican on the turnbuckle!

 

CABOOSE

I don’t like this.

 

Colombian Heat whips PRL into the opposite turnbuckle. He does a Flair Flip onto the ring apron. PRL holds onto the top rope to keep himself from falling. He stops to point to his head, telling the crowd how smart he is. The crowd boos. PRL dances across the ring apron, only to get clotheslined by Colombian Heat! The clothesline sends Tha Puerto Rican off the apron and onto the floor.

 

COLE

Colombian Heat is doing all he can to win the OAOAST 24/7 Championship for the first time!

 

Colombian Heat picks PRL up, and whips him into the ring steps. PRL hits the ring steps shoulder first and then falls to the floor. Vitamin X and Stephen Joseph have worry looks on their faces. Heat picks up the top ring step and lifts them over his head. He throws the ring steps onto PRL’s left shoulder! PR screams like a little girl. Heat throws the ring steps away, and then picks up Puerto. He places him next to a barricade, and then unleashes several knife-edged chops across the chest of Tha Puerto Rican!

 

*CHOP!*

 

“WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

*CHOP!*

 

“WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

*CHOP!*

 

“WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

*CHOP!*

 

“WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

CABOOSE

Oh, his chest is going to be red in the morning!

 

Heat takes PRL over to another barricade, where he slams his head against it. He punches PRL in the face, as Mickey Jay tries to get both men back into the ring. Heat tells the ref to “Yo, back off, G!” When Heat turns around, Tha Puerto Rican greets him with a kick to the stomach! PRL punches Heat in the face several times. He whips him into the ring—Heat reverses—PRL hits the ring back first, and then gets clotheslined down by Colombian Heat!

 

COLE

And Stephen Joseph is at ringside. A desperate, distressed look on his face! His protégé, his client, could lose the 24/7 Championship tonight!

 

CABOOSE

Hmmm. Even though I hate Popick, he is PRL’s manager. So, I don’t know whether to be happy that he’s upset, or be sad. Decisions. Decisions.

 

Heat drags The Corporate Champ over to some more ring steps, where Heat slams PRL’s face against it. PR stumbles around ringside, so Colombian Heat throws him back into the ring. Heat enters the ring, and then picks PR up. He gives him an Irish whip into the ropes. Sleeperhold!

 

COLE

He got him! He can win the Title right here!

 

CABOOSE

Escape PR! Escape!

 

Tha Puerto Rican flails his arms around, trying desperately to escape. The crowd cheers, hoping for the match to end now. PR starts losing energy, but he is able to grab Colombian Heat by the waist, and give him a back suplex—BUT WAIT! Colombian Heat lands on his feet! He pushes PRL into the ropes, and then rolls him up!

 

1…

 

2…

 

KICK OUT!

 

COLE

Close call!

 

Both men get up at the same time. They charge forward. PRL ducks Heat’s clothesline. He punches Heat in the back of the head, and hooks his arms from behind. He goes for a backslide pin…but Heat won’t let him. Heat goes for a backslide pin of his own, but PRL won’t let HIM! They fight over who gets the backslide pin, the crowd getting louder by the second.

 

COLE

Who’s going to get the pin? PRL? Colombian Heat?

 

Colombian Heat is able to do a backslide on PRL! 1…2….KICK OUT! CH grabs Puerto Rican, and whips him into the ropes. Puerto Rican fires back with a flying clothesline on Colombian Heat!

 

VITAMIN X

OH YEAH! Did you see that? He just went BOOM~! BOO-YAH! BOOM~!

 

STEPHEN JOSEPH

Yeah, I saw it. I saw it.

 

The crowd boos loudly. PRL laughs at Colombian Heat. He does some shaky leg kicks all over Colombian Heat’s body. Puerto Rican drops several fists onto the forehead of Colombian Heat. PRL does the fist drops several more times, and then bounces off the ropes, shakes his shoulders, dusts his right shoulder off, and then drops another fist onto Colombian Heat’s forehead. The Five-Knuckle Shuffle!

 

CABOOSE

You can’t see PRL!

 

COACH

Word to your mother!

 

COLE

Aw geez.

 

PRL does the “You can’t see me!” hand gesture, and proceeds to choke Colombian Heat with his bare hands. Mickey Jay tells him to stop doing this, or else be disqualified. PRL stops at the count of 4. PRL picks up Colombian Heat. He Irish whips him into the ropes. Tilt-A-Whirl Backbreaker! PRL covers Heat.

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

Heat puts his right shoulder up at 2.9999999999!!!

 

PRL mouths, “Damnit!” PRL grabs Colombian Heat and places him in a front facelock. He does a vertical suplex on him. PRL rolls through, and does another vertical suplex on Colombian Heat. PRL rolls through again, and lifts Colombian Heat up for a third vertical suplex. He holds Colombian Heat up in the air for a few seconds, letting the blood rush to his head. The crowd applauds PRL.

 

CABOOSE

Look at the strength of PRL! Isn’t it incredible?

 

COLE

Can PRL complete the Corporate Trifecta on Colombian Heat?

 

PRL does the “You can’t see me!” hand gesture, and then walks over to the ropes. He drops Heat’s stomach on the top ring rope, and then does a vertical suplex on him, completing the slingshot suplex, and The Corporate Trifecta! Afterwards, PRL applauds himself, irritating the crowd.

 

“P.R. SUCKS!

P.R. SUCKS!

P.R. SUCKS!

P.R. SUCKS!”

 

PRL jaws with the fans.

 

POPICK

Don’t listen to them! Just keep on attacking Heat!

 

P.R. kicks Colombian Heat while he’s down on the mat. Puerto picks Colombian Heat up and lifts him up for another vertical suplex. But it’s not a suplex. Instead, it’s a brainbuster!

 

CABOOSE

Nah, that move won’t work. Colombian Heat doesn’t actually have a brain!

 

COACH

HA! Good one, Boo-Boo!

 

CABOOSE

Don’t call me Boo-Boo!

 

COACH

Okay.

 

PRL covers Colombian Heat. He gets a two count!

 

PRL

STAY DOWN, MOTHERFUCKER! STAY DOWN!

 

COLE

PRL, taunting Colombian Heat, trying to beat him and retain his 24/7 Title!

 

PRL chokes on Colombian Heat, and then picks him up. He nails Heat with several European Uppercuts. “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican punches Heat into a turnbuckle. He stomps a mudhole in Colombian Heat. P.R. then chokes Colombian Heat with his right foot. Another loud “P.R. SUCKS!” chant starts. PRL stops to glare angrily at the crowd, and then punches Colombian Heat with Rock-style punches. Colombian Heat falls through the ropes onto the floor!

 

COLE

And we go back to the outside to continue the fight!

 

PRL exits the ring. He grabs a cable and chokes Colombian Heat with it.

 

COLE

Now come on! This isn’t right! This isn’t a No Disqualification Match!

 

CABOOSE

But it is a title match, so the rules should be a little less strict.

 

Mickey Jay tells PRL to stop choking Heat, so PRL threatens to punch him in the face. The referee backs off. Puerto punches Colombian Heat in the face. He whips Colombian Heat into the other ring steps. Heat hits the ring steps shoulder first!

 

COACH

And Colombian Heat eats the stairs with that one!

 

Both PRL and Colombian Heat are starting to get tired. By now, half of PRL’s facepaint has disappeared. Puerto throws Heat back into the ring. He kicks Heat in the back, and then applies an abdominal stretch on Heat.

 

COLE

PRL now has the deadly abdominal stretch applied!

 

PRL pulls back. Mickey Jay checks on Colombian Heat, who refuses to give up. PRL yells out, “Just give up, old buddy!” Stephen Joseph walks right over to where PRL is, and pulls on his right hand, which causes PRL to pull back even more on the abdominal stretch. The crowd boos.

 

COLE

Hey! Someone get Popick out of there!

 

The referee sees Popick helping PRL with the abdominal stretch and tells him to stop. Popick obliges. Heat screams out in pain. The crowd chants, “LET’S GO HEAT! LET’S GO HEAT! LET’S GO HEAT! LET’S GO HEAT!”

 

MICKEY JAY

Do you give up?

 

COLOMBIAN HEAT

AW HELL NAW!

 

Heat shakes his fists, and finds it in himself to do a hiptoss on PRL, escaping the abdominal stretch! PRL gets up, so Colombian Heat punches him in the face. Heat whips PRL into the ropes. Heat puts his head down, so PRL kicks him in the face, and then clotheslines him down! Puerto picks up Heat, and gives him a bodyslam. The crowd buzzes in anticipation, since they know that the bodyslam is the set up for The Corporate Elbowdrop. And indeed, PRL climbs the top rope, takes off his left elbowpad, throws it to the crowd, does some weird hand signals, and then leaps off the top rope, doing the “Up yours!” hand gesture in mid-air…

 

 

 

 

 

And hits the Corporate Elbowdrop…

 

 

 

 

 

NO! THE CORPORATE ELBOWDROP MISSES~!!!

 

COLE

Whoa!

 

COACH

How did he do that?

 

The crowd explodes with cheers! PRL clutches his left elbow in pain.

 

COLE

I have never seen anybody escape the Corporate Elbowdrop! Colombian Heat is the first person to escape the Corporate Elbowdrop!

 

CH gets up. He smiles at the crowd. PRL gets up, just as Colombian Heat starts his offense again. He punches PRL in the face, getting him dazed and confused, and then whips him into the ropes…PRL reverses…Colombian Heat reverses…PRL does a backflip OVER the top rope onto the floor!

 

CABOOSE

That’s not fair!

 

Colombian Heat bounces off the ropes, and NAILS PRL right in the head with a baseball slide that sends PRL into Sofa Central! Stephen Joseph stands next to PRL, and is growing more and more concerned.

 

COLE

The Corporate Champion is in big trouble right about now!

 

Colombian Heat plays to the crowd, who cheers him on! Heat points to the turnbuckle, and then to the announcer’s table where PRL is at. The crowd cheers again. Heat exits the ring and climbs the top rope.

 

COLE

Oh no! I’m getting up!

 

COACH

Disqualification! This is a disqualification!

 

COLE

Incoming!

 

Heat stands on the top rope, ready to fly onto PR who is on the outside. But then, Vitamin X runs up to Heat and grabs his right leg. He holds on with all his might, and is successful at preventing Colombian Heat from leaving the top rope.

 

CABOOSE

Get ‘em, X! Get ‘em!

 

Colombian Heat lunges after VX, so Vitamin X runs away. Heat jaws at VX, not noticing that PRL is getting up. PRL climbs the ring steps, and grabs Colombian Heat by his yellow basketball jersey. He then THROWS Colombian Heat off the top rope and onto the floor!

 

COLE

Oh man!

 

VITAMIN X

Yeah! Way to go!

 

Colombian Heat lies face down on the ground, apparently unconscious. Mickey Jay checks on him.

 

COLE

Colombian Heat is lifeless!

 

CABOOSE

Quick! Check to make sure he isn’t breathing!

 

COLE

Why, that’s a horrible thing to say!

 

PRL walks over to Colombian Heat, a sneer on his face. He kicks Heat in the back. Tha Puerto Rican stops to pose on the outside, garnering LOUD boos! He does the “Up yours!” gesture.

 

CABOOSE

That’s just more proof right there that he is the greatest Corporate Champion of all-time!

 

Tha Puerto Rican kicks Colombian Heat in the back again. Heat has shown no signs of life yet. PRL walks over to the announcer’s table and takes off Michael Cole’s headset.

 

COACH & CABOOSE

Thank You!

 

PRL puts the headset on.

 

“THE CORPORATE CHAMPION” THA PUERTO RICAN

You’re terrible, Michael Cole! Beat it! You jabrony! Finally, after eight long years, tonight at Anglepalooza, I’ll prove, without a shadow of a doubt, that I am BETTER than Colombian Heat! Colombian Heat was nothing more but a lackey. A coattail rider! And you’re seeing the proof right now, as I whoop his candy ass all over this damn arena!

 

Colombian Heat is now getting up. He uses the announcer’s table to help himself up.

 

THA PUERTO RICAN (CONT’D)

Look at this piece of trash! He’s a thug! A no good thug! He’s pathetic and useless just like all the other pieces of trailer park trash in this arena! You want to see me kick his ass some more?

 

CABOOSE

I’d love to see you kick his ass some more!

 

PRL

All right. Well, watch this! What do you think of THIS?

 

Tha Puerto Rican slams Colombian Heat’s head on top of the announcer’s table! Heat crumbles to the fall.

 

COACH

DAY-UM~!

 

PRL

There he is. The biggest, most bonafided, no good, Ebonics spewing, ball grabbing, weed smoking, 50 Cent listening piece of trailer park trash walking God’s green earth!

 

CABOOSE

Can I get a high five on that?

 

PRL

Hell no, you won’t get a high five on that! I’ll give you a high five to the face! How ‘bout that?

 

CABOOSE

Okay then.

 

PRL

You thirsty, Heat? You must be thirsty. Here, have some water.

 

PRL grabs Michael Cole’s water bottle and drinks from it.

 

He SPITS THE WATER BACK INTO COLOMBIAN HEAT’S FACE~!!!

 

The water wakes Heat up, as he grabs PRL! However, PRL punches Heat in the face to stop the comeback! PRL grabs Colombian Heat by his head.

 

PRL

Now, here is the nail in the coffin! For the millions and millions of Tha Puerto Rican fans, watching live, plus the losers at home! Colombian Heat, you can kiss MY CORPORATE ASS!

 

PRL slams Colombian Heat’s head on top of the announcer’s table. No he doesn’t!

 

PRL

I said, Colombian Heat, you can kiss MY CORPORATE ASS!

 

PRL tries to slam Colombian Heat’s head on top of the announcer’s table again. He STILL won’t budge! Colombian Heat punches PRL in the face, knocking the headset off of him! He slams PRL’s head on top of the announcer’s table!

 

CABOOSE

Watch it!

 

Colombian Heat beats on PRL’s forehead on the top of the announcer’s table! Mickey Jay tells Heat to get off of PRL. Heat grabs PRL, who is trying to catch his breath, and throws him into the ring. Heat then enters the ring and climbs the top rope.

 

COLE

Colombian Heat is going to fly!

 

CABOOSE

Aaahhh! You’re back!

 

Tha Puerto Rican gets to a vertical base. Colombian Heat jumps off the top rope with a double axehandle!

 

Tha Puerto Rican catches Heat, and slams him down to the mat with the Latin Slam!

 

COLE

Latin Slam! Latin Slam! The Latin Slam on Colombian Heat!

 

The crowd is shocked at what they just saw. Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat both lie on the mat, breathing hard.

 

COLE

The Latin Slam took a lot out of Tha Puerto Rican as well as Colombian Heat!

 

The camera does close-ups of PRL and Colombian Heat. Referee Mickey Jay checks on both men, and then begins his 10 count.

 

1…

 

2…

 

3…

 

CABOOSE

Come on PR! Get up! Get up! GET UP!

 

4…

 

PR starts to move.

 

5…

 

Heat starts to move.

 

6…

 

PRL sits up.

 

7…

 

Colombian Heat sits up.

 

8…

 

PRL gets to his feet.

 

Colombian Heat gets to his feet at the same time. The two FORMER best friends meet up in the center of the ring to engage in a slugfest! Back and forth they go, trading punches with the crowd cheering Heat on!

 

COLE

Both men are giving it their all! Both men want to become the 24/7 Champion!

 

PRL gains the advantage. He whips Heat into the ropes. Heat reverses. PRL reverses THAT…and gives Colombian Heat a SPINEBUSSSSSSTTTTAAAAHHHH~!

 

CABOOSE

Oh yeah! Here we go, baby!

 

The crowd starts cheering loudly. PRL stands in the center of the ring, standing over Colombian Heat. PR gets ready to deliver the IntenseZone Elbow. PR removes his right elbowpad, spits on it, and throws it down onto Colombian Heat’s face. He does some weird hand signals, and then bounces off the ropes, leaps over Heat, and then bounces off the opposite ropes.

 

CABOOSE

It’s now time for the most electrifying move in professional wrestling, The IntenseZone Elbow!

 

PRL stops to do a SHIMMY~!, and then drops the IntenseZone Elbow on Colombian Heat to a loud pop! Stephen Joseph and Vitamin X applaud PRL.

 

CABOOSE

YA-HOO!

 

PRL covers Colombian Heat.

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

THRE—KICK OUT!!!

 

COLE

Colombian Heat kicked out! And Vitamin X and Stephen Joseph cannot believe it!

 

VITAMIN X

I need a Tylenol! This match is giving me a headache!

 

PRL is PISSED~! He picks up Colombian Heat, muttering obscenities at him, and whips him into a turnbuckle. Stinger Splash! PR whips Colombian Heat into the opposite turnbuckle. Tha Puerto Rican layeth’s the smacketh downth on Colombian Heat! PRL punches Heat in the face, Rock-style. Heat blocks a punch! Punch! Punch! Punch! Heat punches PRL until he is dazed and confused, and then throws him into the turnbuckle! Colombian Heat unleashes Martial Arts kicks to Tha Puerto Rican all over his body! It culminates in a jumping back kick to Tha Puerto Rican’s jaw! PRL crumbles to the mat. The crowd starts cheering as Colombian Heat heads to the opposite turnbuckle and measures PRL up.

 

COLE

It could be time!

 

COACH

Time for what?

 

CABOOSE

Oh no! I HATE this move!

 

PRL rests on the bottom turnbuckle. Colombian Heat does the low rider gesture, and then charges forward, doing the Broncobuster on Tha Puerto Rican!

 

COLE

Broncobuster! Broncobuster! Broncobuster on Tha Puerto Rican!

 

CABOOSE

Oh yuk! PRL is going to have to wash his face for days!

 

Colombian Heat gets off of PRL and plays to the crowd. The crowd cheers loudly. Heat pounds his chest, and does a dance similar to Eddie Guerrero’s with a smile on his face.

 

COLE

Colombian Heat feels the Heat!

 

CABOOSE

Oh God! He’s fired up! He’s going to make the comeback! Quick PR! Do something!

 

CH picks PR up from the turnbuckle. He whips him into the ropes. PRL reverses. Puerto goes for a clothesline, but Heat ducks, and delivers a spinning neckbreaker on Tha Puerto Rican! Heat picks up PRL and measures him up. He punches PRL in the face. He punches him in the face again. And again! Colombian Heat DANCES~! And then punches PRL in the face for a fourth time, knocking him down!

 

COLE

Shake, Rattle, & Roll from Colombian Heat!

 

Colombian Heat bounces off the ropes, does a SHIMMY~!, and then drops a knee onto PRL’s face!

 

COLE

Shaky Leg Kneedrop!

 

Heat exits the ring and climbs the top rope. He waits for Tha Puerto Rican to get up. PRL gets to his feet. Colombian Heat jumps off the top rope with a missile dropkick that connects with PRL!

 

COLE

Picture perfect missile dropkick from Heat!

 

Colombian Heat sits right up. He looks at his right hand. The crowd starts cheering. Heat’s right hand starts to shake.

 

COLE

Can you feel the Heat?

 

Colombian Heat does the spinaroonie to a loud pop!

 

COLE

Spinaroonie! Spinaroonie! Spinaroonie!

 

CABOOSE

Ugh, that’s the stupidest move in the history of wrestling!

 

COLE

Colombian Heat is on the comeback! He has weakened PRL! It might be only a short time from now that we see the Colombian Necktie!

 

Heat gets up and plays to the crowd. He does a shimmy, and then puts his hands over his throat and gags. The crowd gets louder.

 

COLE

That’s it! That’s the signal for the Colombian Necktie! Heat is ready to finish this match!

 

CH waits for PRL to get up. However, he sees Stephen Joseph get on the ring apron. Colombian Heat runs over and knocks Popick off the ring apron, drawing a pop!

 

COACH

Way to go, Heat!

 

But Popick’s distraction allowed PRL to get up. He attacks Heat from behind, and gives him several European Uppercuts. PRL Irish whips Heat into the ropes—Heat reverses. PRL bounces off the ropes…into a SUPAHKICK~! From Colombian Heat! NO! PRL blocks the Supahkick, spins Heat 360 degrees, grabs his head, and DRILLS him with a Dangerous DDT!

 

COLE

Ooh! PRL DRILLED Colombian Heat into the mat with that one!

 

PRL and Colombian Heat lie on the mat. PRL’s Puerto Rican flag facepaint is all but gone now. PRL and Heat are both tired, sweating, and breathing hard. Referee Mickey Jay starts the 10 count again. Stephen Joseph is recovering from Heat’s shot.

 

COLE

Stephen Joseph has a concerned look on his face! Have we reached the end of PRL’s 24/7 Title reign?

 

3…

 

4…

 

5…

 

CABOOSE

Get up, P.R.!

 

6…

 

PRL and Heat both sit up.

 

7…

 

Heat uses the ropes to get up.

 

8…

 

Heat is up. Meanwhile, Vitamin X slides in PRL’s custom made spinner 24/7 Championship belt into the ring. PRL grabs the belt, and when Colombian Heat comes towards him…

 

 

::BELSHOT~! To Colombian Heat!::

 

COLE

Ooh! What a shot! He knocked Heat out cold with that one!

 

CABOOSE

Beautiful! Beautiful!

 

PRL throws the belt out of the ring and quickly covers Heat.

 

1…

 

 

2…

 

 

 

 

3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

KICKOUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

CABOOSE

WHAT?

 

COLE

No! It’s not it! That wasn’t the end!

 

The crowd almost had a heart attack right there! PR and Vitamin X can’t believe it!

 

COLE

Colombian Heat used whatever strength he had left to kick out! He still has some hope left! He still has a chance to become 24/7 Champion!

 

The crowd starts chanting, “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” again. PRL breathes in deep, calming himself down. Popick and VX are pacing around ringside, concerned looks on their faces. Puerto stands up, sneers at Colombian Heat, and looks at the crowd.

 

“THAT’S IT!”

 

COLE

And here we go! PRL is signaling for the Corporate Nightmare!

 

Tha Puerto Rican gets into position to deliver the Corporate Nightmare. The crowd becomes hot, some cheering for the move, while most are worry for Colombian Heat. PR taunts Heat as he gets to one knee.

 

COLE

Many men have fallen to the Corporate Nightmare, INCLUDING Colombian Heat! Will he fall to it again?

 

CABOOSE

PRL shouldn’t waste anytime. He should just do the Corporate Nightmare now!

 

COLE

I think he wants Colombian Heat to suffer.

 

Heat gets to his feet. A hush silence falls over the crowd. Colombian Heat turns around…

 

KICK WHAM CORPORATE NIGHTMARE!!!

 

COLOMBIAN HEAT ESCAPES!

 

Heat goes to clothesline PRL, but PRL ducks…. and Heat hits Mickey Jay instead!

 

COLE

The referee is down!

 

The crowd groans. Colombian Heat is shocked at what he did. Tha Puerto Rican attacks him.

 

COLE

We have no referee! There’s no one out here who can make the count!

 

Puerto Rican and Heat engage in another slugfest. Heat gains the advantage. He whips PRL into the ropes. Clothesline! PRL gets up. Another clothesline! PRL gets up again! Another clothesline! PRL gets up AGAIN! Another clothesline! Heat grabs PR and gives him The Bong Hit (The Stroke)!

 

COLE

The Bong Hit! The Bong Hit on PRL!

 

Heat stomps PRL. He picks him up. Heat punches PRL in the face. Suddenly, the crowd starts booing. Why, you ask? Because from the entrance comes The Official Referee of The Lightning Crew, THOMAS RODRIGUEZ!

 

COLE

Oh no! Not him!

 

COACH

Why not? This match needs a referee. Thomas Rodriguez is an official OAOAST referee! He can call this match right down the middle!

 

COLE

Oh. Sure he can.

 

CABOOSE

What? He can.

 

Thomas jogs to the ring, a smirk on his face. Popick and Vitamin X tell him to enter the ring. Colombian Heat glares at Thomas angrily as he enters the ring.

 

COLE

I just have a hard time believing that Thomas Rodriguez will be able to officiate this match, fair and square.

 

CABOOSE

You got to have a little faith, man. Thomas will do fine!

 

As Thomas enters the ring, Vitamin X undoes the top turnbuckle pad with a pair of pliers. Colombian Heat jaw jacks Thomas, but Thomas promises that he won’t be a biased referee. Heat says something that starts with “Yo momma…” VX takes off the turnbuckle pad and whispers something to PRL.

 

COLE

I don’t like where this is going.

 

CABOOSE

Don’t worry, man. Stop being such a wanker.

 

A “P.R. SUCKS!” chant starts again. Colombian Heat is still jawing with Thomas.

 

*DING!*

 

PRL low blows Colombian Heat!

 

COLE

Ooh! And Heat goes down hard!

 

The Corporate Champ grabs Heat and takes him over to where the exposed top turnbuckle is. He laughs evilly. Suddenly, Colombian Heat feels the Heat and attacks PRL! The punches stun PRL enough, that Heat turns PRL around. He does a double leg takedown on him, grabs his legs…and catapults him into the exposed top turnbuckle! The crowd explodes with cheers as PRL falls to the mat! Colombian Heat covers PRL!

 

COLE

Heat’s got him! Heat’s got him hooked!

 

Thomas Rodriguez just stands there. Heat tells him to, “Count, yo!” Thomas stands frozen, causing the crowd to boo.

 

COLE

Now come on! Thomas Rodriguez refuses to make the count!

 

Colombian Heat yells at Thomas to make the count.

 

HEAT

YO! Make the count, or I’ll KICK YOUR ASS!

 

That’s enough to make Thomas get down and slap the mat!

 

1…

 

2…

 

 

 

3—PRL PUTS HIS RIGHT SHOULDER UP!!!

 

COACH

Phew!

 

COLE

If Thomas had only been a few seconds earlier, he would have counted 3!

 

COACH

Well, don’t be so sure about that, Cole.

 

CABOOSE

We were almost a second away from a new 24/7 Champion. A pathetic, weak, idiotic 24/7 Champion!

 

Heat eyes Thomas with a pissed off expression on his face. Thomas tells him that he can’t touch him because he’s an OAOAST official. Heat goes back to beating on PR. Heat picks PRL up and gives Puerto the Pimp Juice (Flatliner)! He covers PRL. And gets a two count. Heat eyes Thomas again. CH picks up PR and whips him into a turnbuckle. Puerto hits the turnbuckle Bret Hart-style (sternum first)! Heat goes to the opposite turnbuckle, and then charges forward, but PRL kicks him in the face! Puerto gives Heat a double-armed DDT! Puerto Rican sneers at the crowd, and then goes to pick up Heat.

 

COLOMBIAN HEAT HITS PRL WITH THE PELE KICK!

 

COLE

Whoa! Did you see that? Colombian Heat just got PRL upside the head with the Pele Kick!

 

COACH

Oh! Damn! He can hit that move from anywhere!

 

CH covers PR!

 

ONE! TWO! KICK OUT!!!

 

COLE

That count was a little slow wasn’t it?

 

CABOOSE

I think you may need glasses. It looked perfectly fine to me.

 

Heat glares angrily at Thomas Rodriguez again. The crowd boos loudly. Heat curses him out in Spanish. Colombian Heat looks to the crowd. He puts his hands around his throat and gags. The crowd cheers.

 

COLE

He’s going to try for the Colombian Necktie again!

 

Heat waits for PRL to get up. Vitamin X and Stephen Joseph look at each other, neither one knowing what to do.

 

COLE

Tha Puerto Rican is in trouble!

 

PR gets to a vertical base. He stumbles, but is able to maintain his balance. Colombian Heat stands right behind, patiently waiting for the right time to execute his finisher.

 

CABOOSE

Look out PRL! LOOK OUT!

 

VITAMIN X

WATCH IT!

 

PRL turns around.

 

COLE

He has no idea what’s behind him!

 

Colombian Heat kicks PRL in the stomach. He hooks Puerto’s arms, turns him around, and lifts him up high! The crowd cheers loudly!

 

COLE

He’s got him up high! Tha Puerto Rican is in trouble!

 

Heat looks at the crowd, looks at PRL…AND THEN DROPS HIM WITH THE COLOMBIAN NECKTIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

COLE

The Colombian Necktie! He got him! He got him!

 

The crowd explodes. Colombian Heat covers “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican. Thomas Rodriguez stands there, hesitant to make the count. Colombian Heat yells at him.

 

COLOMBIAN HEAT

If you don’t make the count, so help me God, I will kill you.

 

Thomas wipes the sweat off his forehead, and gets on his knees to make the count.

 

1…

 

 

2…

 

 

2 ½

 

2.9999999999999999999999999

 

Thomas looks at Heat.

 

3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111111111

 

*DING DING DING* (24:43)

 

“YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!”

 

COLE

It’s over! The match is over! Tha Puerto Rican’s 24/7 Title reign is over!

 

Colombian Heat gets on his knees and crosses himself. He looks up at the sky and thanks God above. “Gasolina (Remix)” by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil’ Jon and Pitbull starts playing. The fans are going absolutely crazy! Vitamin X and Stephen Joseph are throwing temper tantrums on the outside.

 

BUFFER

The winner of this match…and NEW One And Only AngleSault Thread Twenty-Four/Seven Champion…COLOMBIAN HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTT!!!

 

CABOOSE

No way! No freaking way!

 

Colombian Heat raises his hands in victory. Mickey Jay is just now starting to get up. The ring attendant hands Thomas Rodriguez PRL’s 24/7 Title belt. Rodriguez is hesitant to give Heat the belt, so Heat snatches it away from him. Colombian Heat raises Tha Puerto Rican’s custom made spinner 24/7 Championship belt over his head. Tears are filling up his eyes.

 

COLE

Colombian Heat has defeated Tha Puerto Rican! Colombian Heat has proven once and for all that he is better than Tha Puerto Rican! Colombian Heat now has his revenge! He has payback for PRL kicking him out of The Lightning Crew! He has done what no one else could do! He is the now the reigning 24/7 Champion!

 

COACH

NO! NO! OH GOD NO!

 

Heat gets on the second turnbuckle and raises PRL’s spinner 24/7 Title belt. He spins the belt plate once. He tells the crowd, “Dis is the last time you’ll see dis belt!”

 

VITAMIN X

Should we go with Plan B?

 

STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK

Yes. Right now would be the right time to go with Plan B.

 

Tha Puerto Rican is starting to get up. Stephen Joseph and Vitamin X enter the ring. Heat is posing on the turnbuckles with his newly won title as “Gasolina (Remix)” continues playing over the P.A. system.

 

CABOOSE

This cannot be happening! Hey, wait a minute!

 

Stephen Joseph has a microphone in his right hand. Vitamin X pulls out a piece of paper from his left jacket pocket and hands it over to Popick. PRL is getting up, shocked that he just lost his belt. Mickey Jay is also getting up. Colombian Heat gets off the second turnbuckle. His smile fades when he sees VX and Popick in the ring. Heat puts PRL’s spinner 24/7 Championship belt over his right shoulder.

 

STEPHEN JOSEPH

Cut the music! Cut the music! CUT THE GODDAMN DAMN MUSIC!

 

“Gasolina (Remix)” by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil’ Jon and Pitbull dies down. The crowd boos. Heat is quizzical.

 

COLE

What’s Stephen Joseph doing?

 

POPICK

Now hold on a second. Just hold on a second. Don’t go off celebrating yet, Heat. Settle down, people. Settle down.

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

POPICK

Now, what I have in my hands is Thomas Rodriguez’s contract. Now, Thomas Rodriguez is supposed to be an official OAOAST referee right?

 

COLE

Yeah. Unfortunately.

 

POPICK

Yeah. But the truth is, Thomas ISN’T an official OAOAST referee! Looking over this contract, I find no mention of Thomas Rodriguez being an actual One And Only AngleSault Thread referee! Therefore, the only conclusion is that Thomas Rodriguez IS NOT an official OAOAST referee!

 

COLE

He’s not?

 

THOMAS RODRIGUEZ

I’m not?

 

Colombian Heat is shocked, as is the crowd!

 

COLE

What does this mean?

 

Vitamin X takes the microphone.

 

VITAMIN X

So, since Thomas Rodriguez isn’t an official OAOAST referee, obviously, he can’t officiate any OAOAST match, especially a title match!

 

The crowd boos, knowing what this means.

 

VITAMIN X

Therefore, as much as it pains me to say this, since Thomas Rodriguez is in NO WAY an official OAOAST referee,

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

VX (CONT’D)

…the pinfall DOES NOT COUNT!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

VX

Colombian Heat is NOT the OAOAST 24/7 Champion. The MATCH MUST CONTINUE!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

 

COLE

Oh come on! This is not right!

 

COACH

Well, you heard the man. Thomas Rodriguez is not an actual OAOAST referee!

 

COLE

I’ve been saying that forever, and now that PRL loses the 24/7 Title you suddenly realize this?

 

CABOOSE

He’s a slow learner. That’s all.

 

Vitamin X takes PRL’s 24/7 Title belt away from Colombian Heat. Heat is pissed off beyond belief! The crowd feels the same way.

 

COLE

The match is still going on. Mickey Jay is now up. He can count the fall.

 

Colombian Heat watches Vitamin X and Stephen Joseph leave the ring.

 

COLOMBIAN HEAT

You BASTARDS!

 

Colombian Heat attacks Vitamin X! He unleashes a flurry of punches and chops to X, knocking him down! He goes after Popick, grabbing him just as he leaves the ring! But before anything can happen, Tha Puerto Rican low blows Heat!

 

COLE

PRL got him again!

 

Heat lets go of Popick. PR grabs Heat by his long baggy orange basketball shorts and rolls him up, holding the shorts.

 

COLE

Hey! Wait a minute!

 

Referee Mickey Jay counts.

 

1…

 

2…

 

3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

*DING DING DING* (25:00)

 

COLE

Oh come on! This is a damn shame! A DAMN SHAME!

 

COACH

Tha Puerto Rican STILL keeps the belt! Woo-hoo!

 

BUFFER

The winner of this match…and STILL One And Only AngleSault Thread Twenty-Four/Seven Champion…”The Corporate Champion” THA PUERTOOOOOOOOOOOOOO RICCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!

 

Tha Puerto Rican laughs evilly as the crowd showers him with boos. Garbage gets thrown in the ring. Colombian Heat sits on the mat, stunned at his lost. Vitamin X and Stephen Joseph high five each other on the outside.

 

COLE

This is a screwjob in the highest order! Colombian Heat has been screwed out of the 24/7 Title!

 

Stephen Joseph hands PRL his spinner 24/7 Title belt. PRL kisses the belt and holds it close to his heart.

 

THA PUERTO RICAN

I’m still the champion. I’m still the champion!

 

COACH

Yes you are PR! Yes you are! WOOOOOOOO!

 

Colombian Heat puts his head in his hands. PRL mocks Heat by putting his hands around his neck and gagging. He spins the belt plate.

 

PRL

You suck Heat! You suck!

 

Heat hears this and lunges after PRL! He beats him up, and the crowd enjoys every minute of it!

 

CABOOSE

Aaahhh! Somebody help him! Somebody!

 

Vitamin X enters the ring with a steel chair. He slams the chair across Colombian Heat’s back!

 

COLE

Oh my!

 

Colombian Heat stops beating up PRL. PRL crumbles to the mat. Heat turns around, and locks eyes with Vitamin X. X pees his pants. CH stalks VX, with the crowd cheering him on. Colombian Heat SPEARS~! Vitamin X down and attacks him with mounted p

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*Cut back to HeldDOWN GM~! Axel in the drawing room, standing behind the tumbler.*

 

AXEL

OK, who we got, who we got... oh. Tremendous.

 

Axel suddenly stops clapping as Alfdogg walks in on the left side, and Brock Ausstin and Rick Heyross walk in on the right side. The two have a staredown, as extra security walks into the room.

 

AXEL

Alf, if you would, go ahead and draw your number.

 

ALF

No no...we'll do the standard procedure. The champ (slaps his belt on his shoulder with his hand) goes last...we'll let the CHUMP go first.

 

Brock starts to lunge at Alf, but is quickly held back by security. Axel takes a step back, as well, as Alf just smiles at Brock.

 

AXEL

Very well...Ape... I mean Brock, please.

 

Brock pulls a plastic container out.

 

BROCK

I think I just pulled YOUR chump card.

 

Brock, never changing his expression, opens the container and looks at his number. He then looks back up at Alf, trying his best to keep a good poker face, but can't resist cracking a sly grin before he and his manager walk off. Alf then reaches into the bin and pulls a container out, and looks at the number, cracking a smile of his own.

 

ALF

Yeah...we'll see who the punk is tonight.

 

Alf starts to walk off, but stops and turns to Axel.

 

ALF

Speaking of which...you can't spell PUNK with PK. You tell your boy to be ready for AngleMania.

 

Alf leaves the room as Axel looks on in disgust.

 

AXEL

He'll be ready. Just like he's ready tonight.

 

*Fade back to SOFA CENTRAL~!*

 

COLE

Peter Knight had better be ready, because Stephen Joseph is a wounded animal!

 

COACH

Aww Naww!

 

CABOOSE

I think... I want Stephen to win.

 

COLE

:o

 

COACH

:o....WHAT?

 

CABOOSE

...No. That can't be right. Double countout?

 

COLE

Its an I Quit match.

 

CABOOSE

Both men quit? That'll do.

 

apfilmiquit9eq.gif

 

*DING DING DING*

 

BUFFER

Llladies and gentlemen, the following contest is an “I Quit” match and it is for the OAOAST Heavyweight Championship of the Wooooorld!!!

 

AYE!

AYE!

AYE!

 

The lights go out as the opening beats of Let’s Go pump across the PA and the fans go bonkers, something nobody would have ever seen happening just a month ago. Stephen Joseph steps into the arena, wearing a stylish “F*** the Upstarts” hoodie and a very noticeable cast over his left arm as he raises it to the crowd.

 

COLE

Well, I for one never thought Stephen Joseph would be cheered by an OAOAST crowd after all he’s done since winning the World Title.

 

CABOOSE

I gotta admit, if Popick winning tonight gets the title away from those wankers, I guess I should not hate the guy’s guts for one night.

 

COACH

Come on guys, he’s still recovering from a concussion and has a fractured arm. You just KNOW PK has his sights set on that cast.

 

BUFFER

Introducing first, the challenger. He is a former OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion and tonight he aims to regain the belt that he lost on New Year’s Day. He hails from Atlanta, Georgia and weighs in tonight at two hundred and twenty-seven pounds….STEEPHENNNNNN JOOOOSEEEEEEEPH!

 

Joseph steps into the ring and hits the corner, raising his arms and pointing at himself, yelling “Fuck me?!”, pointing to the entranceway and yelling “No, fuck HIM!”. The music fades and the crowd begins to boo, automatically waiting for the opening of Oh Hell Yeah, the champion’s signature music. However, when the lights go out, a blue hue fills the arena as a new song is heard ….

 

I've been defeated and brought down

Dropped to my knees when hope ran out

The time has come to change my ways…

 

Then a flourish of drums and guitar accompany rapidly strobing blue lights before suddenly stopping and the chorus kicking in as Peter Knight steps through the curtain.

 

On this day

I see clearly

Everything has come to life

A bitter place and a broken dream

And we'll leave it all behind

On this day

It's so real to me

Everything has come to life

Another chance to chase a dream

Another chance to feel

Chance to feel aliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive

 

BUFFER

And his opponent. From Fall River, Massachusetts, weighing in at two hundred and sixty-five pounds. He is the current reigning and defending One and Only Anglesault Thread Heavyweight Champion of the WOOOOOOOOOOORLD….Peterrrrrrrrrrr Kniiiiiiight!!!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!”

 

Knight stops on the top of the ramp and unstraps the title belt from around his waist, holding it aloft as the strobes surround him. He lowers it and points in Joseph’s direction, slapping the belt and pointing to himself, telling him that the title isn’t going anywhere tonight. Metalingus continues playing as Knight begins the long walk down the aisle.

 

COACH

Now THERE’S a guy I’m proud to call champion. I’ve never seen anyone show so much confidence when holding that belt.

 

CABOOSE

Hope he doesn’t stop short or you’ll end up even further up his ass.

 

Knight continues walking, mentally preparing for the battle to come, but Joseph decides that he’s been waiting long enough and slides out of the ring, charging up the aisle and starting the match there with a right hand. The crowd erupts as both men trade punches in the aisle. The smack of fist hitting jaw is clearly heard from both their microphones.

 

COLE

And here we go! Just like last year, both men are fitted with small wireless microphones that will pick up whatever they say during this match, so I would cover the kiddies’ ears if I were you.

 

Knight and Joseph brawl to the ringside area and Knight attempts to whip Joseph into the ring post, but Joseph reverses the whip to allow Knight to eat the steel. Joseph picks him up from the floor and slides him into the ring before kneeling and lifting the ring apron, reaching under the ring and pulling out a steel chair. He slides it into the ring and rolls in, but that leaves him open for a stomp to the head from Knight. He delivers a few more stomps and drags Joseph to his feet, whipping him into the ropes and knocking him back down with a back elbow to the jaw. He quickly drops down after him and chokes him.

 

KNIGHT

Come on Stephen, it’s only gonna get worse from here. Say it and save yourself right now.

 

JOSEPH

Fuck you!

 

Knight releases the choke and drops a knee to the face, followed by another before grabbing his left arm and pulling at the cast. Unable to tear it off, he chooses instead to stomp it, stepping on the forearm and pulling it back as Joseph grunts in pain.

 

COLE

As Coach said earlier, Joseph suffered a fracture in that arm in the New Year’s Day match. It still has not fully healed, so he is wearing a cast over it and you were right Jonathan, it might as well have a big target painted on it.

 

Knight holds onto the arm and pulls Joseph up to his feet, draping the arm over the top rope and pulling on the hand from underneath, but Joseph uses his free arm to deliver a few forearms to knock Knight back. Knight charges in again, but Joseph knees him in the gut, doubling him over for a kneelift that knocks him down. Joseph walks over and picks the chair up, motioning for Knight to stand as he readies a shot. Knight gets to his feet and turns, but he is ready for SJ and quickly ducks, the momentum spinning SJ around and allowing Knight to scoop him up from behind and take him to the mat with a back suplex. Knight stands, picking up the chair as he does so.

 

KNIGHT

So, you wanna swing some steel, huh?

 

COACH

Oh yes, sweet irony.

 

Knight holds it in position as Joseph scrambles to his feet. Knight walks around him, not giving SJ a chance to see where the shot is coming from until he is right behind him. He steps forward and swings….but Joseph somehow knows what is coming as well and drops down, hooking his feet around Knight’s ankle and tripping him up, causing PK to drop the chair and fall face first to the mat. Joseph quickly spins around and hooks in a front facelock, pulling Knight to his feet as he tightens the hold. He hooks Knight’s tights and attempts to lift him up for a suplex, but Knight blocks it. A second attempt is also blocked and this time reversed as Joseph is the one picked up for a suplex. Knight holds him and parades around the ring for the cameras before, instead of falling backward, tossing Joseph forwards onto his stomach and face. Knight stands and goes to work on the head of Joseph, laying in some stomps and dropping down to slap on a headlock.

 

COACH

See, this is why Stephen Joseph is going to have a tough time winning tonight. You don’t recover fully from a serious concussion and a fractured arm in just a month so right off he’s not coming into this match 100%, and Knight knows it.

 

Knight releases the hold and drags Joseph towards the ropes, draping his head over the middle rope and pressing his knee into the back of his neck.

 

KNIGHT

You can’t beat me, Popick. Whatever to try to throw at me, I’ll give back twice as hard.

 

He releases the choke and pulls Joseph up, pushing him against the ropes and shooting him off, scooping him up on the rebound and taking him down with a sidewalk slam. He quickly goes again to the left arm and pulls on the cast, again trying to tear it off, but SJ retaliates by smacking the hardened plaster against Knight’s forehead, knocking him back, followed by another shot….and another which rattles Knight pretty good and allows Joseph to get to his feet. He hauls Knight up and whips him off the ropes, charging and going airborne, leveling Knight with a flying cast shot.

 

“YEAHHHHHHHH!!!!”

 

COLE

You may have been a bit hasty here, because Stephen Joseph is starting to gain control for the first time tonight, using that cast to his advantage.

 

Joseph slides to the outside and lifts up the apron again, rummaging underneath until he finds what he’s looking for…..a ladder.

 

“YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!”

 

CABOOSE

Popick’s starting to feel it here.

 

SJ slides the ladder into the ring and ducks down again, tossing in another steel chair with it. He sets the ladder up in the corner and unfolds the chair, placing it in front of the ladder. He pulls Knight up by the hair and brings him towards the ladder, shoving him into it back-first and delivering a few more cast shots to weaken him. He runs back towards the opposite corner, pauses to shake the cobwebs out and charges. As he runs, he uses the steel chair to propel himself upwards……

 

*CRACK*

 

“OHHHHHHHHH!!!!!”

 

…..and delivers a knee to Knight’s face, smacking the back of his head against the ladder!!!

 

COLE

Stephen Joseph with a flying knee to Knight against the ladder!

 

Knight collapses face-first to the mat as Joseph pulls himself up with the ropes. He rolls Knight onto his stomach and drops down to get in his face.

 

JOSEPH

You think I’m just going to let you pound me into this mat? (Looks towards the ladder) Hope you liked the taste of that ladder Peter, because I’m going to shove it right down your throat!

 

“YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!”

 

CABOOSE

Getting worried, Coach?

 

COACH

Of course not. It’s still too early and Knight will take any punishment Popick gives him in order to keep that title.

 

Joseph stands and walks over to the ladder and pushes it to the mat, laying it on the mat near the corner and pulling Knight to his feet. He pulls him over to the corner and hooks him in a front facelock before backing up the turnbuckles and sitting on top. He extends his arm and twirls his finger around.

 

COLE

Wait a minute. Joseph might be going for a tornado DDT here.

 

Joseph prepares himself…but Knight holds on to the top rope to block it. SJ tires again, but Knight blocks again and punches him in the gut. A few more punches break the grip he has and Knight turns so he is facing the ring with Joseph behind him. He reaches up and grabs Joseph by the wrists. He pulls forward on them and drops down, the momentum sending Joseph off the turnbuckles, flipping over Knight and…..

 

*CRACK*

 

“OHHHHHHHHHH!!!!”

 

…landing back first on the ladder! Joseph quickly rolls off the ladder, shaking in pain on the mat and holding his back.

 

COACH

Flipping slam onto the ladder! I told you I wasn’t worried.

 

Knight spits a loosened tooth into the crowd and looks at Joseph, a very pissed off look on his face. He quickly walks over and drags him up, ducking down and hauling him up into a fireman’s carry. The Toronto crowd stands, knowing what is coming.

 

COACH

That’s it. He wants to finish this match right now.

 

Knight steadies himself, spins Joseph off…and drives him into the mat with a Knightmare!

 

COLE

Knightmare! Stephen Joseph drilled into the mat with a Knightmare! That can’t help his concussion.

 

CABOOSE

He’s got too hard a head to be concussed that easily.

 

Knight rolls Joseph onto his back and gets into his face again.

 

KNIGHT

It’s over, Popick. I’ve got you right where I want you. Say it, NOW!

 

JOSEPH (barely coming to)

Urgh….go fuck…..your mother. I ain’t…..saying…….anything.

 

Knight looks over at the ladder and then the chairs in the ring. A lightbulb seems to go off in his head.

 

KNIGHT

Ok. Remember, you asked for this.

 

Knight stands and walks over to one of the chairs, picking it up off the mat and dropping it next to Joseph’s body. He retrieves the other and holds it, motioning for SJ to get up. Joseph slowly begins to get up on spaghetti legs, grimacing from the pounding in his head. He gets to his knees and then lifts one off the mat, but that’s just the position Knight was waiting for as he takes a step forward and drills him in the head with the chair, the *SMACK* of steel on skull sounding like a gunshot. Joseph crumples to the mat and falls limp.

 

COLE

Oh, what a chairshot! He scrambled Stephen’s brains with that shot!

 

Knight drops the chair and raises his arms as he stands over Joseph’s body, drawing loud boos from the crowd as he looks around them, a smile on his face. He looks down at Joseph and slowly shakes his head before looking back up and slowly drawing his thumb across his throat.

 

COACH

Oh yes. It’s over now.

 

Knight drops the chair he was holding and drops down, pulling Joseph’s head up just enough so that he can slide the chair under it. He picks up the other chair and puts a foot on Joseph’s neck as he gets a good grip. He holds it in the air and the flashbulbs begin to pop, the crowd anticipating what is to come.

 

COLE

Oh no, not a Conchairto. Not that.

 

Knight raises the chair over his head and looks up to the crowd one last time before beginning his downswing……but he stops himself. He looks down again at Joseph and shakes his head again before dropping the chair

 

COLE

Oh thank goodness. Maybe Knight has some compassion after all.

 

COACH

I don’t think so, Cole. Look what he’s doing.

 

Knight walks over to the ladder and picks it up, unfolding it and setting it up near SJ. He makes sure it is sturdy before walking back over to the chair he dropped. He picks it up again and this time, places it on top of Joseph’s head. He looks again to the crowd, a cruel smile on his face as he backs up towards the ladder. The Toronto crowd holds their breath, realizing what Knight is about to do.

 

CABOOSE

Oh dear God.

 

COLE

SJ’s head is sandwiched between those two chairs and he’s……oh no! Someone stop this!

 

Knight slowly makes his way up the rungs as the fans get their cameras ready. Joseph begins to stir a bit as Knight reaches the next to last rung and sits on top of the ladder. He lifts his hand and makes the sign of the cross as the flashbulbs pop again in the arena.

 

COLE

NO!

 

Knight stands upright, steadying himself while looking around the arena, an evil smirk on his face. He takes one last breath and leaps, sticking his legs out as he falls…..

 

*CRACK*

 

And hits a guillotine legdrop on the top chair, sandwiching SJ’s face between the two steel chairs!!

 

“OHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!”

 

COLE

A guillotiner legdrop Conchairto! My God!

 

CABOOSE

Damn. Ok, NOW he has another concussion.

 

“HOLY SHIT!!”

“HOLY SHIT!!”

“HOLY SHIT!!”

“HOLY SHIT!!”

“HOLY SHIT!!”

 

Joseph goes limp as Knight, slightly limping from the impact, kicks the top chair off and drops to his knees, pulling Joseph up by the hair, his face now a bloody mess.

 

KNIGHT

Come on, Popick. You want it to end? Just two little words and its over. Look at you, you can’t beat me and the more stubborn you are, the worse it’s gonna get. Now, SAY IT!!

 

Joseph’s microphone picks up his grunts of agony and shallow breaths as he tries to fight through the immense pain coursing through him. He opens his mouth, but only squeaking sounds are heard as he tries to speak. He swallows, tasting his own blood as he does so and attempts to speak again. The words come out almost as a grunt.

 

JOSEPH

Fu….Fu…..Fuck you. Not over yet.

 

“YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!”

 

Knight pushes his head back to the mat and sighs in frustration. He looks at something outside of the ring before looking back at the challenger. He rolls under the bottom rope to the floor and pauses to catch his breath.

 

KNIGHT

You’ll say it. You’ll say it, even if I have to permanently cripple your ass.

 

COLE

What else could he have planned?

 

Knight walks over to the ring steps and shoves the top portion off, bending down and picking up the flat bottom part, straining to do so from fatigue. Knight places it on the apron and shoves it into the ring before rolling back in. He slides the steps to the center of the ring and again pauses to rest. Grabbing Joseph by the hair, he pulls him back to his feet and stares into his eyes, showing “The Most Hated Man in the OAOAST” what true hatred is like before bending and scooping him in a fireman’s carry position and walking over so that he is standing behind the steps.

 

CABOOSE

Oh no.

 

COACH

Oh yes.

 

Knight stands in that position, allowing the fans to drink in the image for a few more seconds before he slightly twists his hips, spins Stephen off his shoulders…..

 

*BAM*

 

“OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!”

 

…and slams him onto the ring steps with a Knightmare!

 

COLE

Goddamnit, that’s enough! Axel made this match to cripple Stephen Joseph and I think he’s succeeded. Stop this match!

 

COACH

Stephen is the only one that can stop this right now.

 

COLE

But he might be knocked unconscious!

 

COACH

Doesn’t matter. If we have to follow him to the hospital and wait for him to wake up to hear those words, this match will continue.

 

Joseph rolls off the steps in a heap, falling limp as Knight crawls over to him and wraps his hand around his throat.

 

KNIGHT

It’s over, Popick. Look at you; you’re lucky that didn’t just break your neck and every one of your ribs. I respect you letting me treat you like a tackling dummy for 15 minutes tonight, but now’s the time to end it. Now, SAY IT!!!!

 

JOSEPH

Ergh….Ahhh….noooo. NOOOOOO!!

 

“YEAHHHHHHHH!!!”

 

CABOOSE

What is he thinking? Damn stubborn fool, say it and end it before you end up dead.

 

Knight looks to the sky in exasperation, closes his eyes and shakes his head. As he lowers it, he looks towards the entranceway and lets out a sigh.

 

KNIGHT

I really didn’t want to do this, but if you want to be a stubborn jackass in this match, then your career will end right now. Just remember, you could have ended this at any time.

 

COLE

What’s he talking about? Where’s he taking him?

 

Knight drags Joseph, who is pretty much 227 pounds of dead weight by now, under the bottom rope and to the floor. Struggling to keep Joseph from collapsing and losing his grip, he slowly drags him up the ramp and to the top of the stage. He leaves Joseph in a heap on the stage and walks back down the ramp, hopping off next to a large black cloth that seems to be covering something. Grabbing it, he pulls the cloth away revealing what is underneath: a large pane of glass being held up by welded metal legs, essentially forming a giant glass table.

 

COLE

No….Axel, PRL, security, someone get out here right the hell now and stop this.

 

COACH

This was Stephen’s choice, and now he’ll have to live with it.

 

COLE

But he might NOT live after this.

 

COACH

Oh, stop with the melodrama.

 

Knight hops back onto the ramp and walks back to a still not moving Joseph. He looks up towards the AngleTron as the image quickly cuts to the back to find the door to Tha Puerto Rican’s dressing room door closed. Someone seems to be trying to force it open, but it won’t budge. Panning down, we see that a chair has been wedged under the doorknob, preventing anyone from exiting. Panning over, we see Johnny Jax and Scotty Static standing nearby. Jax smiles to the camera and holds up a key. Knight smiles and gives the screen a thumbs-up as the image switches back to live action. Knight drags Joseph towards the edge and tucks his head between his legs. Knight scoops him up into a powerbomb position and holds him there as the flashbulbs pop all around the arena.

 

COACH

Goodbye Stephen. Hope the hospital has a soup you like.

 

As Knight holds him there, he pauses before doing the deed.

 

KNIGHT

This is your last chance, Stephen. Say it now or suffer the consequences. You have ten seconds. Ten….

 

nine….

 

 

 

eight…..

 

 

 

It seems as if half the crowd begs Joseph to say it to save himself while the other, more bloodthirsty half is begging him not to say it and get splattered. Nick Patrick, only

 

 

 

seven…..

 

 

 

six……

 

 

 

five…..

 

 

 

four…..

 

 

 

 

 

three….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

two….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

JOSEPH (barely intelligible)

Ok…..ok…..I ……I quit……I quit.

 

Even before he’s finished speaking, Nick Patrick mercifully calls for the bell.

 

*DING DING*

 

COLE

Thank God! Oh, thank God he said it.

 

COACH

Damn.

 

Knight lowers him back down and Stephen lays exhausted on the stage as Knight raises his arms. Metalingus starts up again as Patrick quickly jogs back down the ramp to retrieve the belt.

 

BUFFER

Lllladies and gentlemen, here…..

 

AXEL

Wait, wait, wait, wait, WAIT! Cut the music!

 

Everyone suddenly stops what they’re doing as GM Axel steps through the curtain to a chorus of boos from the crowd.

 

COLE

The match is over. What does he want?

 

AXEL

Let’s hang on for one minute here. I was watching this match in the back, and I don’t know if I lost sound for a second, he didn’t say it loud enough or I went deaf or what, but I didn’t exactly HEAR Stephen Joseph actually SAY the words “I Quit”.

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

 

COLE

Oh come on, he DID!

 

COACH

You know, come to think of it, I didn’t hear it either.

 

CABOOSE

Oh shut up.

 

AXEL

As the General Manager of HeldDOWN, I reserve the right to overturn any referee decision that I believe was made in error so, by the powers vested in me by this company, along with the fact that I said I wanted Stephen Joseph to never appear in an OAOAST ring again….I hearby declare that Stephen Joseph never said “I quit” and I order this match to continue!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!”

 

COLE

NO! Please, someone stop this!

 

AXEL

PK, send him over.

 

Knight stands over Joseph and looks over at Axel with an unsure expression, but Axel simply curls his lips into an evil smile and nods. Knight, a smile crossing his lips also nods and grabs Joseph by the hair, tucking his head between his legs and raising his arms to the crowd. Bits of trash begin to land on the stage as Knight grabs SJ around the waist and hauls him back onto his shoulders. Again Knight glances over to Axel and this time, Axel puts his thumb up, rotating his wrist until it points downward. Knight nods and releases Joseph, sending him down….

 

Down…..

 

 

Down…..

 

 

 

*CRASH*

 

….and crashing through the glass table, smashing it into thousands of shards of glass that spill all over Joseph’s body.

 

“HOLY SHIT!!”

“HOLY SHIT!!”

“HOLY SHIT!!”

“HOLY SHIT!!”

“HOLY SHIT!!”

 

COLE

Those two men are SICK!! Stephen Joseph needs help and he needs it NOW!

 

CABOOSE

I’m just stunned, Cole. I admit that part of me is giddy at Joseph finally getting his, but this is too much.

 

COACH

Stop feeling sorry for the guy. He could have said “I Quit” at any time and prevented this. The fact of the matter is, Zack Malibu better be watching this closely because that man in the glass is going to be him someday, along with anyone else that tries to screw with the Upstarts.

 

Axel orders Patrick to give Knight the belt and raise his hand as EMTs and officials rush to the scene. Axel and Knight simply look on, contentment on their faces as the glass is carefully brushed away around Joseph’s body and his is prepared to be put onto a stretcher. Tha Puerto Rican, finally able to escape his dressing room, storms through the curtains and past the men on the ramp, hopping down and joining the EMTs in removing an unconcious SJ from the table. Axel looks over to Knight and a gives him a nod, saying “I heard him now” as the camera gets a good shot of a bloody and battered Stephen Joseph laying next to the stretcher and backboard being prepared for him as we fade out.

 

Fade in to an empty arena, shots of the empty seats are spliced with the image of a single spotlight iluminating an empty ring. The ghostly echo of cheering is heard as the camera pans around the ring as voices and images from the past appear almost as a dream.

 

AngleMania I

 

JR: Good Evening, BAH GAWD, and Welcome to AngleMania (echo)...Mania....Mania.....

 

HHH refuses to tap saying he'll never job to AS!

 

Chris Jericho appears through the crowd and tells the Time Keeper to ring the bell!

 

DINGDINGDING!

 

FINK

The winner of the Match and

NEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWW One & Only AngleSault Thread

HeavyWeight Champion of the World,

AngleSault!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

 

[/b]AngleMania II[/b]

 

POP DROP! POP DROP! ZACK MALIBU COVERS!

 

1...

 

2...

 

3!

 

* DING DING DING *

 

The crowd ERUPTS. People jump to their feet. Zack Malibu, completely spent, rolls off of Anglesault and onto his back. A shot of Zack holding the belt aloft is added in

 

JR

HE DID IT, JESS! BAH GAWD, WE HAVE A NEW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION....ION....ION.

 

AngleMania III

 

...SCHOOL'S OUT ON CALVIN STOPS HIM DEAD IN HIS TRACKS~!

 

Malibu collapses across Calvin's body, not even able to hook a leg, as this cover is purely out of desperation! Earl Hebner slaps the canvas, as the crowd counts along...

 

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE!!

 

TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

 

THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

 

COLE

YES~! HE DID IT~! HE DID IT~!

 

Another shot of Zack with the belt is added as more cheering is heard.

 

AngleMania IV

 

Axel jumps up -- AND SPIKES THE HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION INTO THE MAT WITH A SECOND CONSECUTIVE AXEL SLAM!

 

The count is made.

 

COLE

HE DID IT! HE DID IT! AXEL HAS DID IT!

 

COACH

WE HAVE A NEW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! AND HIS NAME IS AXEL!

 

Now.....an event five years in the making.......

 

Cut to a montage of the current OAOAST stars in action, including Leon Rodez, Alfdogg, Zack Malibu, Chicks Over Dicks, GPX, Tha Puerto Rican and more. The footage speeds up, the images becoming more and more of a blur until we quickly cut back to the empty arena, where now one man stands in the middle of the ring, though his identity is obscured. He looks around the arena as the camera gets in closer. He turns toward it and reveals......

 

 

 

Anglesault, smiling like a proud papa. The image fades out, replaced by.....

 

am52hx.gif

 

Coming April 2nd

Trump Taj Mahal, Atlantic City, New Jersey

 

Fade out.

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As we return live, EMTs have immobilized Stephen Joseph on a stretcher and are wheeling him out of the arena as Peter Knight and Axel remain on the stage, having moved over to a pair of comfy leather recliners that are situated just left of the entrance. A couple of lovely models pour each man a glass of champagne and they toast PK's victory. Knight then hands off his belt to the brunette and takes a seat while Axel sets the briefcase down next to his chair and also sits.

 

COLE

Look at this; they nearly kill a guy and now they're acting like kings.

 

COACH

You know, I wonder if they'll let me join them up there?

 

CABOOSE

You sit your ass right here, Coach.

 

COLE

Well folks, the time is here! The Road to AngleMania V officially begins right now. Let's go up to our special guest announcer for this match, The Fink!

 

FINK

Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for the Lethal Rumble MATCH!

 

*crowd pops*

 

Here are the rules. In just a few moments, the participants who drew numbers 1 and 2 will begin the match, and every two minutes thereafter, another wrestler will enter the ring according to the number he drew. In the Lethal Rumble, it is every man for himself. Elimination occurs when a wrestler is thrown out over the top rope and BOTH FEET must hit the floor. The one participant remaining after all 30 have entered will be declared the winner, and will receive an OAOAST World championship match at AngleMANIA!

 

*crowd pops*

 

LETHALRUMBLE.jpg

 

God of Thunder hits and Thunderkid comes through the curtain.

 

COLE

And here comes the #1 entry, Coach!

 

FINK

Introducing the participant who drew #1! From Green Bay, Wisconsin...THUNDERKID!!!

 

Thunderkid steps through the curtain and Axel stands, pointing at him and slapping the briefcase, reminding him that there's something else on the line other than a title shot.

 

COLE

Thunderkid makes his way to the ring, he's had problems with his partner, Reject, as of late, Coach, however, they did manage to advance in the Anderson Cup tournament just ten days ago!

 

COACH

That's right, Cole, but Thunderkid won't have any partners in this one!

 

CABOOSE

You know, I'm shocked that Axel didn't abuse his powers even further and made Zack go in as #1, just so 29 other guys have a little extra motivation to toss him out.

 

COLE

Thunderkid, a former North American champion, can earn a shot at the World title tonight, but he'll have the tallest mountain to climb in order to do so!

 

Sweet Home Chicago hits.

 

COACH

Speaking of tall mountains...

 

Jumbo struts through the curtains as the lyrics start, giving high fives to the fans.

 

FINK

And now, here is the #2 participant in the Lethal Rumble match! From Chicago, Illinois...JUMBO!!!

 

COLE

So the biggest man in the match will have to start all the way from the beginning, Coach!

 

*DING DING DING*

 

COLE

These two men know each other very well, of course TK involved in that huge rivalry with the now defunct Stevens/Heyross Incorporated!

 

TK and Jumbo trade blows, then Jumbo grabs a headlock. TK pushes him off into the ropes, but Jumbo ducks a clothesline and hits one of his own! Jumbo dances for the crowd, who responds positively.

 

COACH

Jumbo getting a nice reaction for that, and TK could be the first one out right here, Cole!

 

Jumbo has picked TK up in a slam position and set him on the top buckle in an elimination attempt! However, TK goes to the eyes of the big guy, then sits up on the second rope and takes him down with a bulldog!

 

COLE

Nice move by TK, but he's got to pick him up and put him over the top!

 

Instead, TK waits on Jumbo to get to his feet, then whips him hard into the buckles! Jumbo bounces back, and TK whips him into the opposite buckles, this time catching him coming out of the corner, scooping him up and giving him a BIG bodyslam!

 

COLE

TK scooping up all 440 pounds of Jumbo and slamming him to the canvas!

 

COACH

Great show of strength there by TK, but again, he's got to put him up and over!

 

TK delivers a stiff European uppercut, which sends Jumbo staggering back into the corner. TK follows him in and drives a few shoulders, then goes for the legs. He gets one up, but Jumbo delivers a forearm to the back as he goes for the second. They trade blows some more, with TK getting the advantage, but as he comes off the ropes, he runs right into the BIG BOOT~! of Jumbo! Jumbo regains his thoughts, then backs into the ropes and comes off with a big elbowdrop!

 

COLE

And here comes the count! We're set to add a third man!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

What's the Difference hits and Reject sprints down the aisle!

 

COLE

It's Reject!!! Reject got #3!!!

 

COACH

I don't believe this, Cole! What luck of the draw for TK & Reject if they can co-exist!

 

Reject slides in and immediately begins laying kicks in to Jumbo, who had TK in trouble again on the ropes. TK and Reject set up Jumbo and whip him into the ropes, but Jumbo ducks and comes back with a double clothesline! Jumbo backs Reject into a corner and drives knees and shoulders in, then makes his way back to TK. TK, however, comes up off his knees with a low blow! Jumbo grabs his balls, then turns around, right into the EULOGY~!!!!!11111 from Reject!

 

COLE

Reject hits the EULOGY~! This should end Jumbo's night if they can get him up!

 

Reject and TK pick up Jumbo off the mat, then pick him up in a double bodyslam and carry him to the ropes, where they dump him over the top and down to the floor!

 

COLE

And there goes Jumbo, the first man eliminated from the 2006 Lethal Rumble!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1st elimination: Jumbo

Entered: #2

Time of participation: 3:01

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Thunderkid, Reject

Left in ring: Thunderkid, Reject

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COACH

Look, Cole!

 

Reject has grabbed TK from behind and has him on the ropes in an elimination attempt! TK struggles, but goes to the eyes of his partner. TK measures Reject, and delivers a bicycle kick as he turns around! TK then picks up Reject in a PRESS SLAM~!, but Reject wiggles free and shoves TK off into the corner, then comes back with a windmill kick! Reject follows up with a dropkick, but a hurricanrana attempt is blocked with a sitout powerbomb!

 

COLE

What a showing between these two tag team partners!

 

TK then slowly gets to his feet and sets Reject up on the ropes.

 

COLE

And the countdown to #4 is set to begin!

 

TK, hearing the count start, sets Reject down and they wait on the next participant.

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Word Up hits, and Nick Garner of the Triple Threat jogs towards the ring.

 

COACH

It's a member of the Triple Threat, Cole!

 

COLE

This is Nick, I'm being told...

 

Nick slides in and hits a quick dropkick on Reject, then ground pounds him for a couple seconds before TK picks him up.

 

COACH

Credit to Nick, he came right in on the offense against these guys!

 

TK holds Nick back and Reject delivers some straight kicks to the midsection. TK then releases the grip and delivers a back suplex.

 

COLE

But he's in there against two guys who are going to work together as long as there's other people in the ring, tough luck of the draw for Nick Garner.

 

Reject follows TK's back suplex with ROLLING THUNDER~! TK then pick up Nick in a hangman's hold.

 

COACH

Oh no, not this again...

 

Reject lays in a roundhouse kick to the midsection! The crowd groans as Nick holds his ribs on the mat.

 

COLE

They're not done yet, Coach!

 

TK picks up Nick, and hooks him in a dragon sleeper. He then lifts him up by the tights, onto Reject's shoulder, for the THUNDEROUS REJECTION~!!!!!11111 Nick is in trememdous agony, and TK and Reject finally pick him up and pitch him to the floor.

 

COACH

NOW they're done, Cole.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2nd elimination: Nick Garner

Entered: #4

Time of participation: 1:07

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Thunderkid, Reject

Left in ring: Thunderkid, Reject

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

As Reject plays to the crowd, TK grabs him from behind and pitches him to the apron!

 

COLE

And Reject was almost done right there, Coach!

 

Reject pulls himself back through the ropes, then walks over to TK and slaps the taste right out of his mouth!

 

COACH

Uh-oh...

 

TK stands there for a second, then delivers a BIG right hand, sending Reject down! Reject reverses a whip to the corner, but as he charges, TK backdrops him to the apron! Reject grabs the hair of TK and drops to his back on the apron, then rolls into the ring. Reject goes for a standing spinkick, but TK ducks and catches the foot, then hooks Reject's leg to his face, locks his hands, and takes him over!

 

COLE

Wow, what a suplex THAT was!

 

COACH

And they're not stopping this time, Cole!

 

10!!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Quiet by Smashing Pumpkins hits and the crowd goes CRAZY as "The Ice Heart" Dan Black runs to the ring!

 

COLE

It's Dan Black!

 

COACH

Here's a guy that could possibly contend with both TK and Reject!

 

Black slides into the ring, and meets Reject with a big clothesline! TK catches a superkick as he gets to his feet! Black then picks up TK and drives him with a BLACK BOMB~!

 

COLE

Looks like you may be right, Coach, and it looks like Reject is on his way out!

 

Dan has Reject on his shoulder trying to slam him out, as Reject desperately holds on to the ropes! TK recovers in time to save his partner, then whips Dan into the ropes. Dan, however, twists around and hits a DDT on TK! Reject comes over and rakes the eyes of Black while he's still on the mat, then drops a snap legdrop! TK and Reject pick up Black and give him a double suplex! Reject plays to the crowd, getting a mixture of cheers and boos, and then they set Black up again, this time with their backs to the ropes.

 

COACH

Oh, they're going to try to take him out this time!

 

Black, however, is able to block, and as he comes down, shifts his weight and takes both men over with armdrags!

 

COLE

GREAT counter by Black right there!

 

Black then picks up TK and sets up the BLACKOUT~!!!!!11111, but TK shoves him off, right into a spinkick from Reject! TK and Reject pick Black up and whip him hard into the corner, but Black comes out with a double clothesline! All three men are down on the mat. Black struggles to his feet first and works on Reject as the count starts.

 

COLE

#6 about to make his appearance!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Make Her Say by O-Town hits, and Scotty Static steps out onto the stage. He gives a thumbs-up to Knight and Axel before he rushes to the ring!

 

COACH

AW YEAH!

 

COLE

It's Scotty Static, one half of the Global Party Xchange!

 

Scotty slides into the ring and starts hammering on Dan Black, until TK grabs him and backs him into a corner. Reject takes over on Black as TK hits a couple kicks to the midsection, but Scotty goes to the eyes and turns it around in the corner. Scotty hits a short dropkick right to the abdomen of TK! Scotty then wrenches the arm and climbs to the top rope.

 

COACH

I'm not sure how smart this move is on Scotty's part...

 

He completes it, however, walking across the top rope and executing a hurricanrana! Scotty kips up, then runs to the ropes and comes off with a snap legdrop! Scotty then lifts TK off the mat and sets him up on the ropes for elimination!

 

COLE

TK could be going right here, Coach!

 

Reject makes the save for his partner, however, and drops Scotty to the mat with a high kick to the head. TK and Reject then focus once again on Dan Black, picking him up and attempting to dump him over as the crowd gets anxious!

 

COACH

And now Dan Black in trouble, Cole, one of the favorites in this match!

 

Suddenly, Scotty sneaks up and dumps ALL THREE guys over the top rope...but they all land on the apron! Scotty doesn't realize this, and starts taunting the crowd. When he turns around, he's in for a big surprise, as all three guys are staring him down! Black hits a chop from Scotty's left side, then Reject drops him with an enziguri! Black then picks up Scotty, and begins the Chimera suplex sequence, hitting a Dragon, German, and finishing with a Tiger suplex!

 

COLE

#7 about to make his way to the ring very shortly!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

G's and Soldiers hits, and out struts Logan "Usher" Mann!

 

COLE

And it's one half of the Heavenly Rockers, who this week in the Anderson Cup will meet Los Diablos de Fuego, who scored a MAJOR upset over the GPX several weeks ago!

 

COACH

And don't forget, TK and Reject both still out there, and there's a very good chance that those two teams could cross paths in that tournament!

 

Logan strides down the aisle and climbs into the ring slowly, and then not-so-slowly drops Reject with a BIG left hand!

 

COLE

And there's that left, right off the bat from Logan Mann!

 

Logan immediately picks Reject up onto his shoulders and sets him up in the corner, attempting to force him over! Meanwhile, TK ducks a double clothesline from Black and Static and hits one of his own!

 

COLE

How about that? One half of Black T and one half of the GPX attempting to work together right there, but TK came back on them with a big double clothesline!

 

TK pitches Scotty over the top rope, but he lands on the apron. TK then rushes over to make the save on Reject, and the two then double team Logan in the corner. TK picks up Logan in a side slam, and Reject comes off the ropes and gives him a legdrop as TK drops down!

 

COACH

Nice double team move there by TK & Reject, and if they keep working together like this and co-existing, they could be in there right up until the end!

 

Static and Black slug it out in another corner, with Black getting the better of the exchange (get it? LOLZ), and giving him a double-arm DDT! Black then goes over and grabs TK, giving him a German suplex! He then goes for one of the Tiger variety, but TK blocks, then gets an arm free and twists around, countering and planting Black with a TOMBSTONE~!

 

COLE

GREAT counter there by TK!

 

Static then dropkicks TK as he's kneeling down, and then goes over to join Reject in a double suplex attempt on Logan Mann. However, Logan is able to counter and plant BOTH guys with the PERCUSSION~!

 

COACH

Wow, he planted BOTH guys with the PERCUSSION~!

 

COLE

Alf just typed that in the PBP, you idiot.

 

COACH

...

 

Here's the countdown, Cole!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Back in Black hits, and Bohemoth walks down the aisle in INTENSE~! fashion as Knight and Axel cheer on another Upstart entering the match.

 

COLE

Oh my, it's another big one, Bohemoth!

 

COACH

Look at him take his time, he's in no hurry! Everyone in the ring's been beaten down and they're all groggy right now, he's going to feast on this!

 

The big man climbs into the ring, and nearly BEHEADS Scotty with a Yakuza kick! He then catches TK charging at him with a HUGE spinebuster! Logan charges next, and gets caught in the EROTIC AWAKENING OF B-CATATONIC~! Bohemoth yells out to the crowd INTENSELY~!, then picks up Logan and chucks him over the top to the floor!

 

COLE

And Logan Mann eliminated by the massive Bohemoth!

 

COACH

What did I tell you, Cole? Bo's having a field day right now! If Zack comes out soon, the bounty is as good as Bo's.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

3rd elimination: Logan "Usher" Mann

Entered: #7

Time of participation: 2:42

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Bohemoth

Left in ring: Thunderkid, Reject, Dan Black, Scotty Static, Bohemoth

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Bo then grabs Reject off the mat, and picks him up over head in a PRESS SLAM~! He walks towards the ropes, but TK chop blocks him, and he falls down with Reject coming down on top! Static hits a standing moonsault, and Black goes to the top rope, and comes off with a DIVING HEADBUTT~! All four men start to celebrate, but TK & Reject go after Black and Static, respectively.

 

COACH

That was some nice teamwork by those four, but they can't give him too much time to recover now!

 

TK sets up the THUNDERBOLT DDT~!!!111 on Black, but Black blocks and drills him with the BLACKOUT~!!!!!11111

 

COLE

Black hits the Blackout! TK is out of it on the mat!

 

Black gets up, and is hit with the SPIKED PUNCH~!!! from Scotty Static! Static plays to the crowd, but Reject spins him around and hits the EULOGY~!!!!!11111 Reject is then sent into the ropes by Bo and hit with the EROTIC AWAKENING OF B-CATATONIC~! Bo is the only man standing as the clock winds down...

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

California Love hits and the crowd goes NUTS for The Parka, as he comes through and points the finger at Bo in the ring!

 

COACH

It's Parka!!!

 

COLE

And Bohemoth awaiting the man who took the HI-YAH championship from him a couple months ago!

 

Parka runs down and slides into the ring, ducking a clothesline and hitting a jumping leg lariat! Parka then ground pounds Bo, then gets up and yells out to the crowd, which gives him a very warm response. Bo hits a thrust to the throat of Parka, then whips him into the ropes. Parka ducks a clothesline, floats over and hits a DDT!

 

COLE

The Parka on FIRE here against big Bohemoth!

 

Reject then begins trading blows with Parka, as TK takes over on Bo and Static and Black continue to slug it out. Reject delivers a kick to Parka, and then joins TK in working Bo over. Parka regains his senses and goes to Dan's aid, as they work over Scotty. Parka then signals to TK and Reject, who set up Bo for a double atomic drop. Parka and Black do the same to Static, and he and Bo collide into one another and fall to the mat!

 

COLE

Double atomic drops in stereo!

 

COACH

Wait, what are they setting up now?

 

TK and Reject stand across from one another, each with a hold of a leg of Bo and Scotty. Parka holds the arms of Scotty while Black holds those of Bo, and TK and Reject drop to the mat and start rowing the boat!

 

COLE

Oh, it's the old rowboat move! Listen to the crowd, they love it!

 

TK and Reject then release the move, and TK jumps Parka and starts choking him on the mat! Reject has Dan Black on the ropes in trouble! TK releases the choke on Parka and goes to help his partner! Bo recovers and gives Black a shove, and Black falls over, but slides back in underneath the legs of TK and Reject! Static chokes Black on the mat as TK gives Bo a savate kick, then he and Reject pick him up and drop him throat-first on the ropes! Parka sneaks up on TK and tries to dump him as the count begins...

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Lose Yourself hits and Jamie O'Hara dashes towards the ring.

 

COACH

And here comes the Birmingham Bad Boy! Upstars represent!

 

COLE

Jamie O'Hara, the #10 entry! We're 1/3 of the way through the entrants!

 

O'Hara slides into the ring and jumps on Parka, saving TK indirectly.

 

COACH

No love lost between these two, Cole!

 

O'Hara backs Parka into the corner and starts laying in kicks as TK and Reject once again work Black over in the corner. This time, however, Black begins to slug back at both men, and fights his way out of the corner. Meanwhile, Bohemoth charges at Scotty Static, who drops down and Bo goes tumbling over him and to the floor! On the stage, Axel leaps out of his seat, holding his head in his hands as Knight pounds his recliner with his fist.

 

COLE

Bohemoth was just eliminated! That was pure reflex on Scotty's part.

 

COACH

No way!

 

COLE

Yes, he's gone!

 

CABOOSE

He was one of Axel's big guns against Zack, but he was eliminated by an Upstart!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

4th elimination: Bohemoth

Entered: #8

Time of participation: 4:36

Eliminated: Logan "Usher" Mann

Eliminated by: Scotty Static

Left in ring: Thunderkid, Reject, Dan Black, Scotty Static, The Parka, Jamie O'Hara

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Bohemoth stands and pounds the mat, looking up to Scotty for an explanation and gets a half-hearted apology from him. Scotty points at himself and says "I got it". Meanwhile, O'Hara pulls Parka out of the corner and gives him a vertical suplex! O'Hara then goes to the top rope, and goes for a MOONSAULT~! However, Parka rolls out of the way, and O'Hara finds nothing but canvas! Dan Black picks up O'Hara on his shoulders and carries him over to the ropes, but O'Hara is able to get his hands on the ropes to stop himself from going over. He then thumbs Black in the eyes before getting clotheslined to the mat by Parka. Parka then starts chopping Black in the corner, then when he tries to whip him into the opposite corner, Black reverses and pulls Parka in for an overhead belly-to-belly!

 

COLE

No friends in this match, as you're seeing right now with two Originals, Dan Black and The Parka!

 

COACH

And as you saw moments ago with Bohemoth being eliminated by his fellow Upstart, Scotty Static!

 

TK and Reject grab O'Hara and hammer on him in the corner, then set him up, and hit the CATEGORY SIX~!!!111 on him!

 

COLE

O'Hara planted, and here's the countdown to #11!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Gasolina by Daddy Yankee ft. Lil' Jon and Pitbull plays and Colombian Heat makes his way to the ring.

 

COLE

Well, Colombian Heat was unsuccessful in his attempt to win the 24/7 title earlier tonight, but a chance at redemption and a World title shot await him in this match, perhaps.

 

Heat slides into the ring and begins to hammer away at TK. Reject comes over and helps out his partner, and the two give Heat a double clothesline. TK sets Reject up for the suplex-headscissor move...but Reject SWERVES~! TK, picking him up in the suplex instead and dropping him to the floor!

 

COLE

Wait a minute!

 

COACH

I love it, Cole! Reject outsmarted his own partner!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

5th elimination: Thunderkid

Entered: #1

Time of participation: 18:34

Eliminated: Jumbo (co), Nick Garner (co)

Eliminated by: Reject

Left in ring: Reject, Dan Black, Scotty Static, The Parka, Jamie O'Hara, Colombian Heat

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

As TK and Reject argue with one another, Scotty Static slugs it out with Colombian Heat. Static goes for a powerbomb, but Heat slides out ala Kidman. Static reverses a whip, but Heat ducks a clothesline and then takes Static down with a flying headscissors!

 

COACH

The dissention continues, Cole!

 

COLE

And some fast and furious action between Colombian Heat and Scotty Static on the inside!

 

As Heat celebrates, however, Dan Black comes out of the corner and nails him with a superkick!

 

Jamie O'Hara goes after Reject, getting somes kicks in to the midsection. Reject fires back, and eventually takes O'Hara down with a dropkick. Black has Heat up on the ropes for elimination! Heat struggles and manages to slide down the back of Black, then attempts to eliminate *him* as Static comes over to give him a hand. However, Parka breaks up the attempt by ramming together the heads of Heat and Scotty. Parka works over Static, but O'Hara comes over to help out his fellow Upstart. Black and Reject work together, delivering a double suplex to Heat! Parka hits a double clothesline on Static and O'Hara as the count begins...

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Know Your Role '99 hits and boos quickly fill the arena as Tha Puerto Rican strides through the curtain. He looks over to Axel and the briefcase as well, partly in anger because of what they did to SJ and partly because he wants the money but neither man acknowledges him.

 

COACH

HERE WE GO BABY!

 

CABOOSE

PR's been 24/7 champ for a good stretch, but I know that he wants to finally go to the next level and win this thing.

 

PR jogs to the ring and goes straight after the weakened Colombian Heat, hitting a Samoan drop and applauding himself as the crowd boos some more.

 

COACH

Yeah, that was great, PR!

 

PR then joins Jamie O'Hara in working over Parka, and they set him up in the corner, each man grabbing a leg and attempting to send him over the top!

 

COLE

Parka in big trouble right now at the hands of PR and Jamie O'Hara!

 

CABOOSE

See ya.

 

Heat takes down Static with a big dropkick, then makes the save for Parka and begins brawling it out with Jamie O'Hara. PR ducks a clothesline from Parka, and hits him with a Latin Slam! PR then sneaks behind Dan Black and gives him a low blow, then sets up the CORPORATE TRIFECTA~!

 

COACH

Here it comes, Cole!

 

CABOOSE

I love this move.

 

PR with a vertical suplex! He rolls over, and hits a second! He then raises Black up for a third, doing the "you can't see me" gesture, then slingshots him off the ropes and completes the move! PR applauds himself afterwards. Reject dropkicks PR right in the face as he sits on the mat!

 

COACH

Oh, no!

 

COLE

Well, Reject not impressed with that, obviously, as he goes to work on the 24/7 champion!

 

Reject hits a snap suplex on PR, then sets up the PITCH BLACK~!!!, but Jamie O'Hara comes flying across the ring and hits a BLOCKBUSTER~! on Reject!

 

COLE

Nice hangtime by O'Hara on that one!

 

Static and O'Hara go to work on Reject, as PR and Heat slug it out in the corner. Heat gets the better of the exchange (which doesn't work like before, since PR isn't a member of the GPX, see), until PR goes to the throat and brings him out of the corner with a bulldog!

 

COLE

And we're set for lucky 13, Coach!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Breathe by Fabolous hits and the Mad Cappa makes a mad dash (LOLZ) to the ring, hearing the cheers of the fans.

 

COLE

And it's Cappa!

 

Cappa slides in, ducks a clothesline from O'Hara and nails a spinning wheel kick! Static attacks him from behind, but Cappa counters an Irish whip and boots Static in the gut, hitting him with the CAPPABOMB~! As Cappa looks up from the position, everyone else is down and out of it, except for PR, who is staring him down from an opposite corner!

 

COACH

Look at the staredown here, Cole!

 

COLE

And the fans notice it too, Coach, listen to them get loud!

 

CABOOSE

They better not forget about the other guys in the ring though. One mistake could be the end of your night.

 

Cappa gets up and gets face-to-face with PR, which only serves to excite the crowd even more! PR shoves Cappa back, to receive a shove in return! PR throws the first punch, and the two are trading blows in the center of the ring! Cappa gets the better of the exchange, and sends PR into the ropes, but puts his head down. PR gives him a foot to the face, then sets him up for the CORPORATE NIGHTMARE~!!!!!11111 Cappa, however, backdrops out of it, and as PR approaches him again, Cappa hits BUST A CAP~!!!!!11111

 

COLE

Cappa hit it! BUST A CAP!

 

Cappa grabs PR and tosses him over the top, but PR barely hangs on, and skins the cat back into the ring! Cappa starts to grab Reject, but PR turns him around and delivers the CORPORATE NIGHTMARE~!!!!!11111

 

COACH

But PR comes right back, Cole, I love it!

 

As both Cappa and PR are out in the ring, Reject gets up and hits a snap legdrop on PR! Static then picks up Heat and gives him a snap suplex, then hops to the second rope, climbs backwards to the top rope, and drops a leg! Cappa recovers and grabs PR again, attempting elimination as the count starts...

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

The fans hear the sound of a cash register opening up. It is followed by Vitamin X saying "Come and take your Vitamin X."

 

COACH

Oh, yeah, here comes some help for PR!

 

Bling Bling hits and VX very quickly runs down and slides into the ring, making the save on PR and lays in some kicks on Cappa. PR and VX set up Cappa, picking him up in vertical suplex position and dropping him down forwards on his stomach! VX then starts dancing around...

 

COACH

Uh oh, Cole! VX is feeling it!

 

As Cappa gets to his feet, VX hits a right! then a second right! VX does the Shane 'O Mac Shuffle, then hits another big punch on Cappa, sending him to the mat! VX then goes over and attacks Parka, who has Jamie O'Hara on the brink of elimination!

 

COLE

A lot of history as well between VX and The Parka, Coach!

 

VX and O'Hara attempt to dump Parka over the top backwards, but Dan Black nails VX and Parka is able to scoot back in. Black hits a back suplex on VX as Reject picks his spots, and hits a BIG kick to the kidneys of PR!

 

COACH

Oh man, what a kick from Reject right there!

 

COLE

And we should point out, Reject was the third entrant into this match, in about a minute we're going to be halfway through the entrants!

 

Reject then pulls VX off the mat and gives him a suplex.

 

COACH

And right here you got the guy that's been in the longest of anyone battling it out with the guy who's the freshest!

 

COLE

Gotta give some credit as well to Dan Black and to Scotty Static, they're both close to the 20-minute mark themselves!

 

CABOOSE

Having been in this match before, I know that those men must be feeling the fatigue, but they can't stop or let down their guard because, as more fresh men enter, they will go right for the ones that are weak. Reject is smart picking his spots like he is right now.

 

Static and Black are doing battle in a corner, as Black presses his knee right into the face of Scotty. O'Hara comes over and rakes the eyes of Black, then delivers a back suplex. Cappa and Heat both approach O'Hara, and deliver a double atomic drop! Black dumps Scotty, who once again lands on the apron!

 

COACH

Look at Scotty continue to hang in there!

 

PR delivers a low blow to Cappa as the count begins again.

 

COLE

Folks, we're at the halfway point of the Lethal Rumble match! #15 about to make his way through the curtains!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Punishment by BIOHAZARD hits and Rick Heyross comes through the curtain, waving Quentin Benjamin towards the ring and following behind.

 

COLE

And it's Quentin Benjamin, one half of Team Heyross and one *third* of the 6-man tag champs!

 

CABOOSE

We've seen how he does in a team, but how he will fare alone with no help remains to be seen here.

 

Benjamin slides into the ring only to get met with big forearm shots from Colombian Heat! Meanwhile, Cappa is on the receiving end of a CURBSTOMP~! from Jamie O'Hara!

 

COACH

CURBSTOMP~!

 

Bnejamin is hit with a big clothesline from Heat, and set up for elimination at the ropes!

 

COLE

And Quentin Benjamin already in trouble, Coach!

 

CABOOSE

I guess not well then.

 

However, Reject of all people makes the save!

 

COACH

How about that save, Cole?

 

COLE

And how about this double team?

 

Benjamin and Reject both hammer on Heat, then whip him into the ropes, and hit him with a double back elbow, sending him backwards over the top and to the floor!

 

COLE

And how about the elimination? What a surprising turn of events that was, and Colombian Heat is headed for the showers!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

6th elimination: Colombian Heat

Entered: #11

Time of participation: 8:27

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Reject, Quentin Benjamin

Left in ring: Reject, Dan Black, Scotty Static, The Parka, Jamie O'Hara, Tha Puerto Rican, The Mad Cappa, Vitamin X, Quentin Benjamin

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

So we're back down to nine men in there now.

 

COACH

Could be eight right here, Cole! Jamie O'Hara in trouble!

 

Reject has O'Hara hanging precariously, but O'Hara manages to slide back in under the bottom. Benjamin kicks away at an exhausted Dan Black on the mat.

 

COLE

There's another tag team showdown right there, Coach, Black T vs Team Heyross!

 

COACH

That's right, and one member of each team still to come yet, as WELL as Brock Ausstin, the third member of the 6-man tag champs!

 

Benjamin picks up Black and hangs him over the ropes, as Scotty Static comes over to help. PR kneels down and reaches through the ropes, pulling on the head of Black.

 

COLE

Three guys now trying to get Dan Black out of there, but no! He STILL slides back in through the ropes!

 

CABOOSE

Black is a slippery bugger. I'm picking him as my dark horse in this one.

 

Parka grabs PR and delivers a fisherman's buster! Cappa delivers knees in the corner to Scotty Static, before VX rakes his eyes and delivers a snap suplex! VX then climbs the top rope right above Scotty, and leaps off, hitting the LEAP OF FAITH~!

 

COLE

And Vitamin X with a big elbow to the heart of Cappa!

 

Reject gives PR a foot to the gut, then comes off the ropes with a swinging neckbreaker! He then sets him up at the ropes, and runs to the ropes, coming back with ROLLING THUNDER~! as the count starts...

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Simply Ravishing hits and the crowd pops HUGE for Tony Brannigan as he makes his way to the ring!

 

COLE

And here comes T-Bod, Coach! Bodies should fly now!

 

Tony rolls in and hits a big clothesline on Quentin Benjamin! He then nails Scotty Static in the midsection, who had Dan Black laying on the top rope. Black climbs down, and the two double up on Scotty, dropping him with a double elbow! Tony then waits on him to get up, and gives him a THUMB TO THE EYE~! Static grabs his eyes and walks right into the BLACKOUT~!!!!!11111 from Dan Black! Static falls back again, right into the OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE~!!!!!11111 Black T scrapes Scotty Static off the mat and dispatches him to the floor! Axel simply shakes his head in disgust on the stage.

 

CABOOSE

YEAH! Originals represent!

 

COACH

OH NO! Why can't Tony pick on someone his own size?

 

COLE

Credit to Scotty, he took one hell of a beating for about 20 minutes, but he's gone!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

7th elimination: Scotty Static

Entered: #6

Time of participation: 20:32

Eliminated: Bohemoth

Eliminated by: Dan Black, Tony Brannigan

Left in ring: Reject, Dan Black, The Parka, Jamie O'Hara, Tha Puerto Rican, The Mad Cappa, Vitamin X, Quentin Benjamin, Tony Brannigan

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Black and Brannigan then go to work on Quentin Benjamin, as Parka and VX do battle in a separate corner. Parka lays in a couple stiff shots, but attempts a charge and VX gets the feet up, sending Parka to the mat! VX then goes over and assists PR in his battle with Reject, as the two hit a double clothesline...and when PR celebrates, VX takes him down with a spinkick!

 

COACH

Aw c'mon, what was that???

 

COLE

No friends in this match, you saw that right there, Coach!

 

However, VX makes the same mistake made by PR, and Parka tosses him over the top and to the floor!

 

COLE

And Vitamin X has been eliminated! He turned his back to preen to the crowd, just like his friend PR, and found himself on the floor!

 

CABOOSE

Like I said, it only takes one mistake to end it all for you.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

8th elimination: Vitamin X

Entered: #14

Time of participation: 5:16

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: The Parka

Left in ring: Reject, Dan Black, The Parka, Jamie O'Hara, Tha Puerto Rican, The Mad Cappa, Quentin Benjamin, Tony Brannigan

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Reject attempts to lift Parka out as O'Hara makes a save for Quentin Benjamin by raking the eyes of both members of Black T. PR and Cappa continue their war, slugging it out in a corner. O'Hara delivers a back suplex to Tony, and then assists Reject in his attempt to dump Parka.

 

COLE

Parka in big trouble again, as we're set for another man!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Slither by Velvet Rovolver hits, and Christian Wright jogs to ringside to the boos of the crowd.

 

COLE

It's another Upstart, the HI-YAH heavyweight champion, Christian Wright!

 

Wright slides in and starts stomping Tony on the mat as Parka manages to get himself out of trouble. Parka crotches O'Hara on the top rope, and climbs up to go for a superplex! However, O'Hara is able to counter and drop Parka crotch-first onto the top rope! O'Hara and Parka both fall to the mat from their positions as Wright delivers a STUN GUN~! to Tony! O'Hara beats Parka to his feet and clotheslines him over the top and to the floor!

 

COACH

Oh, and Parka is gone!

 

COLE

Tough break for Parka, Jamie O'Hara catches him with that clothesline, he's gone after a nice run of nearly 20 minutes!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

9th elimination: The Parka

Entered: #9

Time of participation: 16:41

Eliminated: Vitamin X

Eliminated by: Jamie O'Hara

Left in ring: Reject, Dan Black, Jamie O'Hara, Tha Puerto Rican, The Mad Cappa, Quentin Benjamin, Tony Brannigan, Christian Wright

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Dan Black hammers on Christian Wright, making the save on his partner Tony Brannigan. Reject chokes away at Quentin Benjamin on the mat with his boot, until PR kicks him in the back of the head, and then sets him up in the corner for elimination!

 

COLE

And again, Reject in trouble, Coach!

 

COACH

Well, he's managed to hang in there for half an hour now, but he could be going out right here!

 

Reject falls to the apron, and pulls himself back in as Cappa goes after PR once again. Benjamin jumps on the back of Tony and puts on a sleeperhold as Tony is trying to dump out Wright. Wright gets to his feet and sends blows to the bread basket of Tony, as Benjamin is able to get his feet to mat and keeps the sleeper on. O'Hara and PR set up Cappa for elimination as Black and Reject kick away at each other.

 

COLE

Cappa in big trouble on the far side!

 

COACH

And look here, Cole! The two guys who have been in there the longest hammering away on each other!

 

COLE

Absolutely, and we're ready for another competitor!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Magnum Opus: Father Padilla Meets the Perfect Gnat/Howling at the Moon hits and the crowd goes BALLISTIC.

 

COLE

And LISTEN to this crowd, #18, the Heartland champion, Alfdogg!

 

COACH

Well, he's one of the favorites in this thing, Cole, no doubt about it!

 

Alf walks out to the entryway, then takes off for the ring, sliding in and hammering away on Christian Wright, then delivering a snap suplex! Alf clotheslines Jamie O'Hara to the mat, then hooks PR and delivers an overhead belly-to-belly! T-Bone suplex for Benjamin, and a superkick to Cappa, then he grabs O'Hara and tosses him over the top to the floor!

 

COLE

Alf coming in on FIRE, and Jamie O'Hara is gone!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

10th elimination: Jamie O'Hara

Entered: #10

Time of participation: 17:02

Eliminated: The Parka

Eliminated by: Alfdogg

Left in ring: Reject, Dan Black, Tha Puerto Rican, The Mad Cappa, Quentin Benjamin, Tony Brannigan, Christian Wright, Alfdogg

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Alf then hooks the arms of PR, allowing Reject to lay in some kicks. Benjamin lays in some kicks of his own from behind on Alf, then drops Alf with a sleeper drop! Benjamin then assists PR in attacking Reject.

 

COLE

Nice move by Quentin Benjamin, really stopping Alf cold there!

 

Wright has Black set up on the ropes, when Tony taps him on the shoulder from behind. Wright turns around and receives a thumb to each eye! Alf hammers away on Cappa in the corner, then sets him up on the top rope! Cappa goes to the eyes of Alf, however, and drops back inside. Cappa then lifts Alf over the top, and tries to eliminate him!

 

COLE

Alf could be gone here at the hands of Cappa, Coach!

 

The count is going as Reject gives a suplex to Benjamin, and makes the save on Alf.

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Word Up hits and Dick Garner runs to the ring.

 

COLE

And it's another Triple Threat member, this is Dick!

 

Dick attacks Cappa from behind, then takes him down and stomps him a few times before slapping him.

 

COACH

Cappa just got dickslapped, Cole!

 

COLE

Oh, how clever. You're just full of LOL's!

 

Dick picks Cappa up, and grabs his leg, then picks him up and drops Cappa's knee on his own! Dick briefly hooks a half crab on Cappa before he gets a kick in the head from Quentin Benjamin. Benjamin picks up Dick and hooks him for a suplex. Dick counters, however, and lifts Benjamin for a suplex of his own! Benjamin is able to get his feet on the top rope, and pushes off and over the back of Dick, then delivers a German suplex, which causes Dick to roll all the way over onto his stomach! Dan Black then drops to the mat and hooks him in the HEART OF ICE~!!!!!11111

 

COLE

NICE suplex by Benjamin, and there's the HEART OF ICE~! hooked on Dick!

 

COACH

He's just trying to squeeze it all right out of Dick!

 

COLE

:rolleyes:

 

Wright drops a knee on Black to break it up quickly, however. Alf and Reject work over PR in a corner, and each grab a leg and try to lift him out!

 

COLE

And PR in trouble again, Coach!

 

COACH

Absolutely, Alf and Reject working together much like Reject was with TK earlier! But Reject showed earlier, he'll dump Alf out if he has to!

 

PR manages to fight his way out, pushing Alf off with one foot, then using the leg to hook Reject in a headscissors, and squeeze until Reject releases him. He then picks Reject up in a fireman's carry, and attempts to dump him, as Reject holds on to the top rope! Cappa goes to the midsection and causes PR to drop Reject back into the ring. Black holds Benjamin for Tony, but Benjamin slips free and Black gets clotheslined to the mat by his partner!

 

COACH

Oh, he takes down his own partner right there!

 

Tony checks on Dan, but Benjamin grabs Tony and manages to take him overhead with a belly-to-belly!

 

COLE

Wow, that's a big man to take over right there, and we're about to be two-thirds of the way through the field!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Frankenstein hits and the crowd starts barking as Frankie Frankensteiner walks through the curtains!

 

COLE

And it's the PSYCHO GREMLIN~!, Frankie Frankensteiner, #20!

 

Frankie barks back at the crowd, then runs to the ring and hits a big SOONERLINE~! on Quentin Benjamin!

 

COLE

And right away, the Sooners and Team Heyross going at it, they'll be doing battle this Thursday in the Anderson Cup!

 

COACH

That's right, Team Heyross is undefeated, and it's gonna stay that way, Cole!

 

COLE

Well, we'll find out this Thursday!

 

Frankie drives in right hands to Benjamin in the corner, as PR works over Tony and Dan slugs away at Christian Wright. Alf drops Dick throat first on the top rope, as Cappa stomps Reject at the side of the ring. Cappa then reaches over the top rope and grabs the bottom rope, giving him leverage as he presses his knee into the side of Reject's face. Alf rakes the eyes of Cappa, then rams his head into the buckle. Alf sets up Cappa for a slingshot, shooting him right into a thrust kick from Reject! Alf then gets up and delivers a snap suplex to PR, then starts going to work on Tony!

 

COACH

Look at this matchup, Cole!

 

Alf gets in a couple right hands on Tony, then ducks Dan Black coming in and Tony eats a superkick!

 

COLE

And once again, Black T with a miscue!

 

Black goes and grabs Frankie from behind, then Tony grabs HIM from behind and floors him with a right hand! Black gets up, shocked, and retaliates with a right of his own, and the two begin slugging it out!

 

COLE

And Black T going at it in the Lethal Rumble match, as we're about ready for another entrant!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Make Her Say hits and Johnny Jax runs to the ring.

 

COLE

And it's the other half of the Global Party Xchange, Johnny Jax!

 

Jax slides in and attacks Tony from behind, and Dick comes over to help out.

 

COACH

We've got 11 guys in the ring right now, Cole, that's the most we've had in at once!

 

COLE

And something's going to have to give here, especially with Reject and Dan Black, both of whom are approaching the 40-minute mark out there!

 

Frankie Frankensteiner is whipped into the ropes by Christian Wright, who attempts a leapfrog, but is caught in midair and powerslammed! Frankie then sets him up on the ropes, but PR sneaks up from behind, dumping Frankie over Wright and onto the floor!

 

COLE

Oh, and something just gave right there, Coach! Frankie eliminated!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

11th elimination: Frankie Frankensteiner

Entered: #20

Time of participation: 2:37

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Tha Puerto Rican

Left in ring: Reject, Dan Black, Tha Puerto Rican, The Mad Cappa, Quentin Benjamin, Tony Branningan, Christian Wright, Alfdogg, Dick Garner, Johnny Jax

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

PR goes right back over to Cappa, as Alf and Reject slug it out in a corner!

 

COACH

Look here, it's Alf and Reject going at it!

 

Reject lifts Alf up in the corner and attempts elimination! Alf squirms in the grip of Reject, and slides free, then grabs the left leg of Reject and tries to force him over the top! Jax comes over and knees Alf in the back, then grabs Reject and gives him a suplex. Jax then lifts Alf up and places him over the corner, attempting elimination, as Christian Wright delivers a samoan drop to Cappa in the center, but stays down out of exhaustion. Alf goes to the eyes of Jax, then kicks him in the face, sending him down. As Dick picks up Cappa and works him over, Alf eyes Wright still laying down in the ring, then looks out to the crowd, which starts to buzz. Alf then stands up on the second rope before moving up to the top...

 

COACH

Oh no...CHRISTIAN, GET UP!!!

 

COLE

Alf setting up...

 

Alf flies and nails the FIVE-STAR ALF SPLASH~!!!!!11111 on Christian Wright!

 

COLE

FIVE-STAR ALF SPLASH to the HI-YAH champion!

 

As Alf gets up, Tony grabs him and drops him with the RUDE AWAKENING~!!!

 

COLE

And Tony very alert, dropping Alf with his neckbreaker!

 

Reject lays in kicks to Quentin Benjamin, then sets him up and plants him with the PITCH BLACK~!!!111

 

COLE

High impact right there from Reject, and Quentin is hurting!

 

COACH

And here's the count, Cole!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Frankenstein hits and The Man of Tommorrow, Frank Frankensteiner, walks down the aisle to the ring, flexing along the way.

 

COLE

And it's the other Frankensteiner, Frank!

 

COACH

And how about the timing, Cole? His partner was just eliminated a minute ago!

 

Frank rolls into the ring, and goes right after PR, grabbing his arm and pulling him right into a clothesline!

 

COLE

And going right after the man responsible for the elimination of his partner!

 

Frank picks up PR in a PRESS SLAM~! and slams him down to the mat! PR holds his back as Benjamin jumps Frank from behind. Benjamin has a standing crossface hooked, but Frank is able to get his hands in and pull Benjamins' off. He then drives an elbow to the gut, and sets Quentin up...driving him with a TIGER BOMB~!

 

COACH

What power shown by Frank Frankensteiner!

 

Frank stays on Benjamin as Black T double up on PR. A big pile-up in one corner sees Wright and Cappa both laying on the top rope, with Cappa having a headscissor hooked on Wright as Jax attempts to force Cappa over with a front facelock. Reject attempts to untie the legs of Wright from the ropes, as Alf and Dick Garner push in the middle, with Dick delivering a headbutt to Alf, sending him to the mat.

 

COACH

At the end of the night, Cole, there's only going to be one man standing in this ring, but look at how hard all these guys are going at it!

 

COLE

Absolutely, and the reason being that that one man is going to AngleMania to take on Peter Knight or whoever the champion may be!

 

COACH

There's other reasons too, Cole! 50,000 of them, to be exact!

 

COLE

Well, Zack Malibu still to come, as well as the other half of the tag team champs, Leon Rodez!

 

COACH

We've also yet to see the other two 6-man champions, Charlie Moss, as well as Brock Ausstin, who I gotta call the favorite at this point in time.

 

COLE

And of course Leon will be the very LAST man to enter this match, but here comes the 23rd man to enter in ten seconds!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Getting Away With Murder hits, sending the crowd into an absolute frenzy, and Christian Wright waits in the ring as Zack Malibu walks through the curtain! Immediately Axel jumps from his seat and opens the briefcase, displaying the money to every man in that ring while Knight stands and points at Zack, saying "There's your man! There's the target!"

 

COLE

And HERE HE COMES, the man with the big bounty on his head!

 

COACH

And Christian waiting to claim it right now, look in there, Cole!

 

CABOOSE

Oh boy, there's 11 guys in the ring and I think that music got all of their attentions.

 

Zack slides into the ring, and Christian pounces him immediately, but Zack fights back, knocking him down with a clothesline! Zack circles the ring, then charges Jax and clotheslines him to the floor!

 

COACH

OH NO!

 

COLE

And the GPX is done for the night, Johnny Jax eliminated by Zack Malibu!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

12th elimination: Johnny Jax

Entered: #21

Time of participation: 4:25

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Zack Malibu

Left in ring: Reject, Dan Black, Tha Puerto Rican, The Mad Cappa, Quentin Benjamin, Tony Branningan, Christian Wright, Alfdogg, Dick Garner, Frank Frankensteiner, Zack Malibu

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Zack goes to work on Reject, chopping away at him in the corner, then grabbing him and pitching him over the top rope, but Reject is able to hang on by the skin of his teeth!

 

COACH

And look at Reject! Zack Malibu comes in fresh and goes to work on him, but Reject still hanging in there!

 

COLE

It's been over 40 minutes now for the former X-division champion, Reject! And Dan Black's not far behind, he came in two entries after!

 

Zack goes over and knocks PR to the mat with a high knee.

 

COLE

And PR taken down, he's got to be closing in on a half-hour himself, Coach, he came in #12!

 

COACH

That's right, say what you want about him, he's still out there fighting even after that heated match earlier with Colombian Heat!

 

Christian Wright hooks Frank Frankensteiner, and converts the CORKSCREW SUPLEX~!!!!!11111

 

COLE

OH, Frank dropped right on his head there by Christian Wright!

 

Meanwhile, Alf lifts Zack onto his shoulders and attempts to put him over the top!

 

COACH

Look here, Alf could be picking up the bounty right now, Cole!

 

PR goes to the gut of Alf, and then grabs Zack himself to attempt elimination!

 

COACH

COME ON PR! Get that money!

 

Cappa sneaks up behind and tries to dump PR as well as Zack! Zack is able to slide underneath the bottom as Cappa stays on PR. When Zack gets up, however, Alf meets him with an overhead belly-to-belly!

 

COACH

Zack taken down there by Alf, and how about the Triple Threater, Cole? Still hanging in there, and has Reject in trouble right now!

 

COLE

And we're about to add another man, this will be 12 in the ring when he gets here!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Punishment by BIOHAZARD hits, and Charlie Moss jogs towards the ring, as Rick Heyross meets him in the aisle and offers words of encouragement.

 

COACH

It's Charlie Moss, Cole!

 

COLE

The second half of Team Heyross, his partner, Quentin Benjamin, still hanging in there!

 

Moss slides in and assists Benjamin as the two hammer away on Frank Frankensteiner, who is still recovering from the Corkscrew Suplex. Moss holds Frank back as Quentin lays some kicks in, then releases and runs to the ropes, and Team Heyross hits the DOUBLE GOOZLE~! Frank staggers to his feet slowly, and Moss and Benjamin charge at him and give him a double clothesline to the floor!

 

COACH

Frank is out, and that's a preview of this Thursday, Cole! The Bruisers on their back at the hands of Team Heyross!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

13th elimination: Frank Frankensteiner

Entered: #22

Time of participation: 4:29

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Quentin Benjamin, Charlie Moss

Left in ring: Reject, Dan Black, Tha Puerto Rican, The Mad Cappa, Quentin Benjamin, Tony Branningan, Christian Wright, Alfdogg, Dick Garner, Zack Malibu, Charlie Moss

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Charlie Moss works over Dan Black, and Quentin goes over and rakes the eyes of Tony.

 

COACH

And here we go again, Team Heyross battling it out with Black T!

 

Christian Wright has Zack Malibu on the corner!

 

COLE

And Christian Wright making a play for the bounty!

 

Dick Garner comes over to help Wright, then kicks Wright away and attempts to eliminate Zack himself.

 

COACH

Dick wants the whole bounty to himself, and could you imagine what this would mean to Dick Garner's career to eliminate Zack Malibu?

 

Zack manages to escape trouble, though, and takes down Dick with a Russian legsweep. Alf and PR duke it out, while Reject chokes Cappa down in the corner. PR goes to the eyes of Alf, then whips him into the ropes. Alf ducks a clothesline, and he and PR clothesline each other!

 

COLE

Alf and PR go down in a heap in the center of the ring!

 

Cappa comes out of the corner and clotheslines Reject, then delivers THE FALL FROM GRACE~! Quentin Benjamin then nails Cappa with a superkick!

 

COLE

Nice kick from Benjamin, and here's the count!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Punishment by BIOHAZARD hits, and Brock Ausstin walks through the curtain.

 

COLE

Oh my God.

 

COACH

And I think the winner of the Lethal Rumble is making his way down the aisle, Cole!

 

Brock walks patiently down the aisle, and then hops onto the apron and climbs into the ring. Brock measures Cappa, and DRILLS him with a clothesline! He then picks Cappa back up off the mat, and sets him up for an F-STUNNER-5~!!!!!11111

 

COACH

And I think this is the end of Cappa!

 

Brock walks over to the ropes with Cappa, and sends him spinning through the air, and Cappa lands with a splat on the floor!

 

COLE

OH GOD!

 

COACH

In more ways than one, I should say!

 

COLE

Get some medical attention out here for Cappa, please!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

14th elimination: The Mad Cappa

Entered: #13

Time of participation: 24:34

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Brock Ausstin

Left in ring: Reject, Dan Black, Tha Puerto Rican, Quentin Benjamin, Tony Branningan, Christian Wright, Alfdogg, Dick Garner, Zack Malibu, Charlie Moss, Brock Ausstin

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

As EMTs run out to assist Cappa to the back, Brock hammers away on Reject. Team Heyross teams up to deliver a double front Russian legsweep to Dan Black. Team Heyross back off, as Dan tries to pull himself to his feet. As he gets to his knees, Brock grabs him by the tights and tosses him over the top to the floor!

 

COLE

And Dan Black FINALLY eliminated! A courageous effort, just over 40 minutes, but a fresh Brock Ausstin is just too much to fight off!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

15th elimination: Dan Black

Entered: #5

Time of participation: 40:54

Eliminated: Scotty Static (co)

Eliminated by: Brock Ausstin

Left in ring: Reject, Tha Puerto Rican, Quentin Benjamin, Tony Branningan, Christian Wright, Alfdogg, Dick Garner, Zack Malibu, Charlie Moss, Brock Ausstin

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

As Dan gets to his feet on the outside, Team Heyross stands at the ropes and waves goodbye to him. As this is going on, Tony charges in with a head full of steam and clotheslines both men over the top! Charlie Moss goes to the floor, but Benjamin pushes off the floor, and pulls himself back up, hooking Tony's head with his legs!

 

COACH

Moss is gone, I think Benjamin touched as well, but I'm not sure if the referee saw it!

 

COLE

Yes, he did see it, you see him trying to wave Benjamin back there! Quentin Benjamin is eliminated!

 

Christian Wright sneaks up and dumps Tony to the floor, and Benjamin falls with him!

 

COLE

Well, he's all the way down now, as is Tony! Black T and Team Heyross are done!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

16th elimination: Charlie Moss

Entered: #24

Time of participation: 3:01

Eliminated: Frank Frankensteiner (co)

Eliminated by: Tony Brannigan

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

17th elimination: Quentin Benjamin

Entered: #15

Time of participation: 21:01

Eliminated: Colombian Heat (co), Frank Frankensteiner (co), Tony Brannigan (co)

Eliminated by: Tony Brannigan

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

18th elimination: Tony Brannigan

Entered: #16

Time of participation: 19:15

Eliminated: Scotty Static (co), Charlie Moss, Quentin Benjamin

Eliminated by: Quentin Benjamin, Christian Wright

Left in ring: Reject, Tha Puerto Rican, Christian Wright, Alfdogg, Dick Garner, Zack Malibu, Brock Ausstin

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Black T and Team Heyross start to brawl to the back, when Tony runs down to the middle of the aisleway and exposes the concrete! He then hammers Charlie Moss and sets him up for a PILEDRIVER!

 

COACH

Oh no, not on the concrete!

 

Fortunately, Moss is able to backdrop out of the move, and the two teams continue their brawl through the curtains, as the camera focuses back in the ring to see Alfdogg staring down Brock Ausstin from opposite corners!

 

COACH

Brock's been waiting a long time for this, Cole!

 

COLE

And vice versa, listen to the crowd!

 

Alf charges out of the corner and nails Brock with a right hand, and the two begin exchanging blows!

 

COACH

And I can't believe it, Alf's getting the better of it!

 

Alf attempts a whip to the ropes, but Brock hangs on to the arm and pulls Alf in for an overhead belly-to-belly!

 

COLE

Great belly-to-belly by Brock Ausstin, and here's the count once again!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Evolution (The Grand Design) by Symphony X hits and Foshi makes his way to the ring.

 

COLE

And here comes Foshi, the former World tag team champion, the #26 entrant!

 

Foshi climbs to the apron, then to the top rope, and flies off with a BIG bodypress onto PR!

 

COLE

And Foshi FLYING into action right away!

 

Foshi goes to work on Christian Wright, as Brock hammers away on Zack in a corner.

 

COACH

Oh ho, I'm lovin' the sight of this, Cole!

 

Brock picks up Zack in a powerslam position and attempts to dump him as the crowd screams!

 

COACH

And the bounty looks like it could go to Brock Ausstin!

 

Meanwhile, Christian Wright delivers the WRIGHT OFF~! to Foshi! Reject delivers a kick to the midsection of Brock, causing him to drop Zack to the mat!

 

COACH

Now why would Reject save Zack?

 

COLE

Maybe he wants the bounty!

 

Wright waits on Foshi to get up and charges him for a clothesline, but Foshi ducks and backdrops Wright to the floor!

 

COACH

NO!

 

COLE

And Foshi has eliminated Christian Wright!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

19th elimination: Christian Wright

Entered: #17

Time of participation: 18:42

Eliminated: Tony Brannigan (co)

Eliminated by: Foshi

Left in ring: Reject, Tha Puerto Rican, Alfdogg, Dick Garner, Zack Malibu, Brock Ausstin, Foshi

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

As Foshi celebrates his feat, Brock FLOORS him with a clothesline, and Foshi lands on his shoulders and head, flips over and ends up on his stomach!

 

COLE

What IMPACT by Brock Ausstin!

 

Alf lifts Dick Garner off the mat, as Reject runs off the ropes and delivers a Hart Attack clothesline! Alf and Reject then pick Dick up off the mat and dump him to the outside!

 

COLE

And another member of the Triple Threat gone, courtesy of Alf and Reject! Nice run by the newcomer!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

20th elimination: Dick Garner

Entered: #19

Time of participation: 15:07

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Reject, Alfdogg

Left in ring: Reject, Tha Puerto Rican, Alfdogg, Zack Malibu, Brock Ausstin, Foshi

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COACH

Six men in the ring, and four to come, Cole!

 

COLE

So we're down to our top ten in the Lethal Rumble match!

 

Reject and Alf go over and double-team on Brock Ausstin, as PR hits a dropkick on Foshi, then picks Zack up out of the corner and attempts to eliminate him! Meanwhile, Reject and Alf whip Brock into the ropes, but Brock bounces right back with a double clothesline!

 

COLE

And Brock Ausstin DOMINANT out there! You may be right, Coach, this may be the man who goes to AngleMania!

 

Foshi nails PR, and then lifts Zack over the ropes himself!

 

COLE

And now, it's Foshi going for the bounty! This would mean a lot to the resurgent career of Foshi to pull this off!

 

Zack gets himself out of trouble by going to the eyes, as the count begins again!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Word Up hits and Rick Garner walks through the curtain, towards his brother Dick.

 

COACH

Hasn't he been eliminated twice already?

 

COLE

No, they're triplets, Coach.

 

COACH

Oh.

 

COLE

Rick coming out #27, his brother Dick was just eliminated moments ago...and now Nick coming back out, what is this???

 

Nick runs towards his brothers and points towards the ring, and the three slide in simultaneously and go after Alf!

 

COLE

And the Triple Threat triple *teaming* Alf, who along with Reject just got rid of Dick! Get Dick and Nick out of there, they've been eliminated!

 

Reject comes over and grabs Dick and pounds away!

 

COACH

And now Reject beating on Dick when he should be focusing on the men in the ring!

 

COLE

:throwup:

 

Rick holds Alf for a clothesline, but Alf gets free and Nick drills his brother! Alf goes to work on Nick, and Alf and Reject whip Nick and Dick from the corners, and they collide with Rick, who is just getting up, in the center of the ring!

 

COLE

Big collision between the Triple Threat!

 

Alf tosses Dick to the floor, as Reject delivers a dropkick to Nick, sending him over the top to the floor, Harley Race-style! Zack then charges Rick and clotheslines him to the floor!

 

COLE

And the Triple Threat is done for the night!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

21st elimination: Rick Garner

Entered: #27

Time of participation: 0:57

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Zack Malibu

Left in ring: Reject, Tha Puerto Rican, Alfdogg, Zack Malibu, Brock Ausstin, Foshi

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Alf and Reject then both grab Zack and attempt to push him over the ropes!

 

COLE

And Zack in BIG trouble at the hands of Alf and Reject!

 

Foshi comes over and grabs Reject, as Brock drops PR to the mat with a big headbutt!

 

COLE

How about that matchup?

 

COACH

Aw, this doesn't bode well for my man PR!

 

Alf grabs Foshi off of Reject and drops him with a Northern Lights bomb! Brock has PR in the air in a PRESS SLAM~!

 

COLE

And now PR in big trouble here!

 

But Alf delivers a superkick to Brock, and PR falls down on top of him! Alf then jumps on top of PR, and Reject runs over and lays over Alf! Foshi leaps over, and Zack jumps right on top of the stack!

 

COLE

Look, it's a dogpile!

 

COACH

What are they doing? There's no pins in this match!

 

Brock has his arms out, however, and digs his feet into the mat and pushes all of the men back off of him!

 

COLE

And Brock Ausstin, just powers right out of it!

 

Brock levels PR and Alf with clotheslines, then delivers a Tazz-plex to Zack as the count starts once again!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Ashburn by Hikari hits and Otaku II runs to the ring, with Ayane following and giving support.

 

COLE

Great luck of the draw for Otaku, as he slides into the ring, a tremendous opportunity for him!

 

Otaku comes right in and takes Alf down with a big spinning flying headscissors, drawing oohs from the crowd! goes right to work on PR, hammering away with rights on the mat. Foshi works on Brock, who's down in the corner, as Reject kicks away at Zack in another corner.

 

COLE

And Reject still looking to pick up that bounty, as well as a title shot at AngleMania!

 

COACH

No doubt, I gotta give the devil his due, it's been over 50 minutes out there for Reject now, Cole! We're definitely seeing who the strength is on that team!

 

COLE

On this night, at least, I would have to agree, but look at Zack fight back!

 

Reject and Zack slug it out in the corner, but Reject goes to eyes and Zack staggers to the middle. Reject sets Zack up for the PITCH BLACK~!!!111 but Zack backdrops out of it! Zack catches Reject and sets up the POP DROP~!!!!!11111 but Reject slides behind the back of Zack, and attempts the EULOGY~!!!!!11111, but Zack pushes Reject into the ropes. Reject turns around to go at Zack...

 

...only to walk right into the SCHOOL'S OUT~!!!!!11111, sending Reject over the top and TO THE FLOOR!!!

 

COLE

And Reject, is FINALLY, out! The School's Out kick from Zack ends Reject's night after 51 minutes in the ring!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

22nd elimination: Reject

Entered: #3

Time of participation: 50:57

Eliminated: Jumbo (co), Nick Garner (co), Thunderkid, Colombian Heat (co), Dick Garner (co)

Eliminated by: Zack Malibu

Left in ring: Tha Puerto Rican, Alfdogg, Zack Malibu, Brock Ausstin, Foshi, Otaku II

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Reject stands up on the outside as Foshi and Otaku double team on Brock Ausstin, as Alf walks over and grabs PR, giving him a fisherman's buster! As the officials try to usher Reject to the back, he stares up into the ring and then pushes Nick Patrick to the floor! Reject then rolls back into the ring, spins Zack around, and delivers the EULOGY~!!!!!11111

 

COLE

WAIT A MINUTE! What's Reject doing back in there? Get him out of there! What a poor display of sportsmanship by Reject!

 

COACH

Yeah, but sportsman are only involved in duck and pheasant hunting, Cole! Where's he going now?

 

Reject hops over the top rope and grabs a chair from the timekeeper's table, but Jack Doan grabs onto it. Reject yanks the chair, pulling Doan around and swinging him to the floor! Reject then rolls into the ring as Zack is coming to, and CRACKS him over the head with it!!!

 

COLE

OH NO!!! DAMN IT, get him out of there!

 

COACH

I love it, Cole! Reject may be eliminated, but it looks like he may be going for a consolation prize here!

 

COLE

And oh God, Zack Malibu has been lacerated, thanks to that chairshot from Reject! What a sore loser!

 

Reject sets up Zack for the PITCH BLACK~!!!111, but Nick Patrick grabs his legs to stop it, and Reject drops Zack and decks Patrick with a right hand! He then pulls Charles Robinson in, and delivers the EULOGY~!!!!!11111

 

COLE

And now he's abusing referees! What in the HELL has come over Reject??? I understand being frustrated because he's out, but get him out of there!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

 

G's and Soldiers hits, and Synth Esizer comes through the curtains!

 

COLE

And #29 is Synth of the Heavenly Rockers, and FINALLY we got Reject out of there!

 

Synth struts down the aisleway, then turns and starts doing the moonwalk. He then raises his hands to the crowd...before Reject spins him around and delivers the EULOGY~!!!!!11111 on the exposed concrete!

 

COLE

Synth looking to avenge the elimination of his partner Logan...WAIT A MINUTE! OH NO, that's exposed concrete!

 

COACH

[sarcastic voice]No shit, Sherlock, Alf just typed that in the play-by-play![/sarcastic voice]

 

COLE

Shut up, Coach, this is serious! Reject has got no business out there!

 

COACH

Cole...Synth looks to be unconscious out there! Remember, that concrete was exposed earlier during the brawl between Black T and Team Heyross!

 

Security runs out to confront Reject, as does his partner, Thunderkid, to talk him down.

 

COLE

And Thunderkid out here now, maybe he can talk some sense into Reject here.

 

TK talks to him for a few seconds, before starting towards the back. Reject raises his hands at the entranceway and is showered with boos, to which he replies with the "up yours" gesture with his arms before walking into the back himself.

 

COLE

Reject finally out of here, listen to the boos follow him backstage!

 

The camera goes back to the ring as PR stomps away at Zack.

 

COLE

And look at Zack now, no way he's going to be able to survive this now after that REVOLTING display by Reject!

 

The camera pans back to the aisleway to show EMTs pulling a barely conscious Synth into a chair.

 

COLE

EMT's tending to Synth, we still don't know if he's going to be able to compete here...we've got six in the ring plus him, and we know we've got Leon Rodez, the luckiest draw of the night, here to come momentarily!

 

Brock traps Zack in a corner, and rakes his boot laces across Zack's bloodied forehead! Otaku comes over and rakes his eyes, as Foshi and PR double up on Alf on the side of the ring.

 

COLE

Alf being double-teamed here, and just moments ago, Brock Ausstin was raking his boot laces across the open wound of Zack Malibu!

 

Brock is now working over Otaku, picking him up and pulling him to the canvas by his tights in a MASSIVE powerbomb!

 

COACH

OH MY GOD. Otaku could have a broken back here, Cole!

 

Brock flexes to the crowd, which greets him with boos. The camera then pans over to show the EMTs guiding a dizzied Synth to the back.

 

COLE

And Synth being helped to the back, apparently he will NOT be able to compete here tonight, thanks of COURSE to Reject! Forget fines, forget suspensions, this guy should be in JAIL!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

23rd elimination: Synth Esizer

Entered: #29

Time of participation: N/A

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Deemed unable to compete after getting the Eulogy on the exposed concrete from Reject

Left in ring: Tha Puerto Rican, Alfdogg, Zack Malibu, Brock Ausstin, Foshi, Otaku II

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

COACH

Easy, Cole! We're getting ready to add our last man!

 

10!!!

 

 

 

9!!!!

 

 

 

8!!!!

 

 

 

7!!!!

 

 

 

6!!!!

 

 

 

5!!!!

 

 

 

4!!!!

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

2!!!!

 

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

BUZZ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Mama Said Knock You Out hits and Leon Rodez walks out of the curtains as the audience goes CRAZY. Leon first stops to check on Synth, patting him on the stomach and then rushing to the ring.

 

COLE

No more numbers, Coach! This is it! One of these seven men will receive a World title match at AngleMania V!

 

Leon goes to work on PR, driving right hands in and delivering an inverted atomic drop, followed by a flying forearm! Foshi gives Leon a boot to the midsection, then sets him up for a powerbomb! He carries him over to the ropes...

 

COACH

Oh man, Leon could join the ranks of Bushwhacker Luke and the Warlord right here, Cole!

 

...but Leon takes him over the top and to the floor with a hurricanrana!

 

COLE

But no! Nice counter, and Foshi is gone!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

24th elimination: Foshi

Entered: #26

Time of partcipation: 8:30

Eliminated: Christian Wright

Eliminated by: Leon Rodez

Left in ring: Tha Puerto Rican, Alfdogg, Zack Malibu, Brock Ausstin, Otaku II, Leon Rodez

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Brock Ausstin stays on Otaku II, double underhooking him and holding him upwards, allowing the blood to rush to his head, before dropping him down on his knee! Leon and Zack go to work on PR in a corner, as Brock lifts Otaku over his head and tosses him down to the floor at Ayane's feet!

 

COLE

And Otaku gone, we're down to five men!

 

Brock grabs the rope as Ayane looks up at him, and thrusts his pelvis at her, drawing a few cheers from the front row.

 

COACH

HAHA!

 

COLE

Come on, that's uncalled for!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

25th elimination: Otaku II

Entered: #28

Time of participation: 4:48

Eliminated: None

Eliminated by: Brock Ausstin

Left in ring: Tha Puerto Rican, Alfdogg, Zack Malibu, Brock Ausstin, Leon Rodez

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Alf dropkicks Brock in the back of the head, leaving him teetering over the top rope! Alf tries desperately to get him the rest of the way over, but PR gets away from Zack and Leon and makes the save!

 

PR then circles the ring with Leon, and when Leon walks Alf's way, Alf grabs him and attempts to throw him over the top!

 

COLE

Leon in trouble at the hands of Alfdogg! Could Leon go to AngleMania and get to the top of the mountain for the first time in his career? Could Alfdogg, or Zack Malibu, become repeat offenders as OAOAST World champion? Tha Puerto Rican, who has had such an excellent reign as the 24/7 champion, could he duplicate that with his first World reign, or Brock Ausstin, who has never in his career held a singles championship, could his first time come April 2nd?

 

Zack makes the save on his partner, and pulls Alf out to the middle of the ring. Alf blocks a right hand and delivers a stiff European uppercut, taking Zack down. He then takes Brock out with a superkick, then delivers one to Rick Heyross, who had jumped up on the apron!

 

COLE

Yeah, get him out of here!

 

As Zack struggles to his feet, Leon taunts PR, and as he comes at him, drop toe holds him onto the middle rope!

 

COACH

Oh, look at this!

 

Leon runs to one side, and comes back and leaps on PR!!!

 

COLE

CALL THAT BITCH BOJANGLES~!!!!

 

Leon celebrates, but walks right into an F-STUNNER-5 from Brock Ausstin!

 

COLE

And an F-STUNNER-5 from Brock Ausstin!

 

COACH

Alf just...

 

COLE

DON'T SAY IT.

 

Alf then climbs to the top rope from his corner!

 

COACH

Oh no, that may not be all!

 

Zack gets to his feet, and as Alf flies through the air towards Leon for the FIVE-STAR ALF SPLASH~!!!!!11111, he dives RIGHT INTO SCHOOL'S OUT~!!!!!11111 from Zack!!!

 

COLE

OH MY GOD, SCHOOL'S OUT AS ALF DOVE FROM THE TOP ROPE!

 

COACH

Alf is OUT of it, and could have a broken jaw here!

 

COLE

Wouldn't surprise me.

 

Brock then grabs Zack, and delivers another F-STUNNER-5~!!!!!11111

 

COLE

And Brock AGAIN, this time Zack the victim!

 

Rick Heyross is shown celebrating on the floor, holding his jaw.

 

COACH

And look who's left standing, Cole!

 

COLE

And he could well be standing with the championship of the world on the 2nd of April!

 

Brock scrapes Alf off the mat, and sets him up for an F-STUNNER-5~!!!!!11111 He carries him over to the ropes.

 

COACH

Oh, yes! This is it for Alf!

 

Brock spins Alf in the air...but Alf manages to grab the right wrist of Brock, and holds onto him...PULLING HIM OVER THE TOP TO THE FLOOR!!! Alf is left sitting on the apron, and quickly hooks the bottom rope with his left leg, and rolls back underneath!

 

COACH

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!

 

COLE

WHAT A COUNTER by Alf!!! And Brock Ausstin is gone, and we're down to the final four!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

26th elimination: Brock Ausstin

Entered: #25

Time of participation: 13:07

Eliminated: The Mad Cappa, Dan Black, Otaku II

Eliminated by: Alfdogg

FINAL FOUR: Tha Puerto Rican, Alfdogg, Zack Malibu, Leon Rodez

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

(59:15)

 

The Toronto fans stand as one, cheering the four men in the ring as Rodez confers with Zack. Meanwhile, PR points to Alf, signaling that they should team up against Zack and Rodez. Alf nods and motions for PR to make the first move, but when he walks by him Alf suddenly grabs him by the back of the neck and pitches him over the top rope. Surprised by the double cross, PR barely gets his hands on the ropes to stop his momentum and lands on the apron, scooting back in under the middle rope with a shocked look at Alf. Alf simply looks at him and says "I don't need help", but suddenly Zack grabs him and turns him around to deliver a right hand as Rodez jumps on PR and delivers some forearm shots to the face.

 

COLE

Alf and PR might not want to work together, but Zack and Leon are used to it by now. That could be a big advantage for both men.

 

COACH

Ah, I got it. Leon's setting Zack up because HE wants the money!

 

CABOOSE

It's called "being a good partner" Coach.

 

Zack backs Alf into the ropes and goes to shoot him off, but Alf reverses it, sending Zack off the ropes and picking him up on the rebound, turning around and slamming Zack to the mat with a spinebuster. Meanwhile, PR ducks a clothesline from Rodez and boots him in the gut, hooking his head and setting him up for the Corporate Nightmare.

 

COACH

Yes, here it comes!

 

But Rodez hooks his leg around PR's to block the first attempt. PR tries again, but Rodez keeps his leg hooked. PR delivers a few knees to Rodez's gut to weaken him, tightens his grip again, hooks Leon's tights.....and nails it!!

 

COLE

Corporate Nightmare!!! That might be enough to put Rodez out!

 

PR stands and drinks in the boos before crossing his arms and sweeping them out to his sides in a Razor Ramon-esque "That's it!" gesture before picking Rodez up by the hair and pointing towards one side of the ring.

 

CABOOSE

PR's picking his side....and here he comes!

 

PR rushes towards the ropes to get momentum with his grip on Rodez's hair tight....but the sweat (and strategically placed hair gel stolen from Alix) in it makes it slick so PR loses his grip just enough for Rodez to put on the brakes and he drops to the mat, sending PR careening over the top rope, but he lands on the apron.

 

PR and COACH

WHEW!

 

PR breathes a sigh of relief and pauses briefly on the apron to catch his breath.....but he doesn't see Rodez get to his feet and standing behind him, coiled like a snake, waiting for the right moment to strike. This happens to be as PR begins to turn around and step back through the ropes. PR sees something in his peripheral vision...but it is too late....

 

*SMACK*

 

....as Rodez scores with superkick right in the mush, sending PR spinning into the apron and to the floor.

 

COACH

NO!

 

COLE

SUPERKICK by Rodez!!!! Tha Puerto Rican is GONE!!!

 

CABOOSE

We're down to three! A valiant effort by PR though tonight.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

27th elimination: Tha Puerto Rican

Entered: #12

Time of participation: 40:45

Eliminated: Frankie Frankensteiner

Eliminated by: Leon Rodez

Left in ring: Zack Malibu, Leon Rodez, Alfdogg

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

As Knight and Axel look on nervously on the stage, Rodez looks at the prone figure of PR on the floor and smirks.

 

COLE

Waitaminute, Alf's got Zack in a precarious position here!

 

COACH

He's inches from collecting!

 

On the other side of the ring, Alf comes up from behind Zack and scoops his legs up, attempting to push him over the top. Zack holds the top rope tightly as his body teeters on it. Axel and PK stand from their chairs and cheer Alf on.

 

But Zack still has one friend in the world as Rodez comes up from behind and delivers a few right hands to Alf, pulling him away so Zack can safely land on the apron and scoot back in.

 

COACH

I don't know what Rodez is thinking. He's got a 1/3 shot at $100,000 AND a World Title match at Anglemania and he's STILL helping Zack!

 

COLE

Zack is his tag team partner, Coach. Leon knows the CRAP that Axel has put Zack through with this bounty buisness and is just doing what tag team partners and FRIENDS do. If Alf goes out, Leon still has a shot at winning this match and Zack wouldn't be angry if he did.

 

COACH

You don't know Zack that well, it sounds like.

 

CABOOSE

But *I* DO Coach and every word that Cole says is true.

 

Rodez and Malibu share a nod and back Alf into the corner. Leon fires off a chop, followed by one from Zack. Another chop from Rodez is followed by another from Zack and this volley continues five more times, the Toronto crowd "WHOOOOOO"-ing all the way through. Alf, his chest now the same color as Zack's forehead, drops to his knees to catch his breath. On the ramp, Axel and Knight (now standing again) begin whispering to each other.

 

COACH

Hey, no fair! There's no teamwork in the Rumble!

 

COLE

Zack and Leon want this match to come down to them fighting it out for a spot at Anglemania.

 

Zack grabs Alf by the hair and drags him to his feet, but Alf manages to rake him in the eyes to get him away and blocks a Rodez punch to deliver a few right hands of his own, rocking him back against the ropes and shooting him off, going for a clothesline but Rodez rolls under it and pops back to his feet, waiting for Alf to turn around so he can connect with a jab

 

A jab....

 

A jab....

 

A jab....

 

A jab...

 

A kiss blown to the crowd before Leon takes a step and smacks Alf in the back of the head with an enziguri.

 

"YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

 

COACH

Dammit, come on Alf!!

 

Suddenly, the crowd's attention is focused on the ramp as they spot Peter Knight walking down the aisle with the briefcase in his hand. Knight glares at Rodez as he walks past him and over to a downed Alf. He brings the briefcase right against Alf's nose and begins to yell at him, pointing at Zack as he does so.

 

CABOOSE

Get him out of there!

 

COACH

He's simply reminding Alf what he's fighting for, guys.

 

Rodez walks over, demanding to the referees that Knight be removed from ringside, but Knight holds up his hands, saying that he's not doing anything wrong and that Axel allowed him to be there. The officials, knowing that they are in for a month of reffing dark matches if they disobey the GM, back off. In the ring, Zack drags Alf up by the hair and yells at Rodez to stop screwing around before getting his eyes raked by Alf. Leon, with a scowl at Knight, begins to turn back around, but PK reaches in and grabs his foot getting Rodez's attention again. He challenges Rodez to come get him and takes a swipe at him from the floor, which misses by a mile, but makes Rodez livid and again distracts him from what's going on in the ring.

 

COLE

Oh yeah, he's not doing anything wrong out there is he?

 

CABOOSE

Dammit kid, ignore him!

 

Meanwhile, Alf begins a small rally on Zack, firing off right hands to the cut and backing him towards the ropes opposite of where Rodez stands. Alf goes for an irish whip, but Zack reverses it and, seeing Rodez, sends Alf back against the same ropes. He ducks down for a backdrop and pitches Alf into the air, but Alf manages somehow to land on his feet. Zack tries a clothesline, but Alf rolls under it. Zack tries another, but Alf steps aside and pushes him as he goes by, adding to Zack's momentum.....as he collides with Rodez, sending him toppling over the top and to the floor!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

28th elimination: Leon Rodez

Entered: #30

Time of participation: 7:22

Eliminated: Tha Puerto Rican

Eliminated by: Zack Malibu

Left in ring: Zack Malibu, Alfdogg

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COACH

HA! I told you guys Zack doesn't care about Rodez! He could have stopped himself, but he saw an opportunity that his ego couldn't pass up.

 

COLE

Regardless of that, we're down to two! Either Zack Malibu or Alfdogg will be in the main event of AngleMania V!

 

Zack scowls and slaps the rope at the sight of Rodez on the floor, but he has little time to be pissed off, because suddenly Alf attempts to take an opportunity of his own and grabs Zack by the legs, lifting him up and over the top rope, but Zack manages to land on the apron and scoot back inside. He quickly stands and locks eyes with Alf, the Toronto crowd now standing as one. With Knight acting as cheerleader for Alf, the two men without a word walk to the center on the ring and begin trading punches!

 

"YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

COLE

Here we go! Thirty have entered, twenty-eight are gone, which one of these two will be the last man standing?

 

Zack ends up winning the slugfest, peppering Alf with rights and knocking him to the canvas with a big left. He quickly drags Alf back up and shoots him off the ropes. He again whiffs on a clothesline, but this time he is ready with a backup move as he catches Alf on the rebound with a hiptoss. Zack pops up and pounds his fist into his chest to the crowd's delight before stepping over to Knight and giving him the 'ol "Double Bird Salute" before dragging Alf back up by the hair and pulling him to the ropes, picking up his legs and draping him on the top rope.

 

CABOOSE

C'mon Zack!

 

Zack pushes on Alf and one leg and arm fall over the rope. Alf grabs the middle rope to keep his balance, but Zack continues to push with all his 200 pound might.

 

COLE

Alf is teetering! That $100,000 may not be collected by anyone tonight!

 

COACH

No!

 

Zack continues to push, getting the other leg over the top and then getting Alf's entire body over, but his grip on the middle and top ropes saves him from going out as his right leg dangles on the apron, mere feet from touching the floor. Zack lays into him with boots to the chest and gut to try and loosen him, but Alf plants his right foot on the floor, which frees his right hand to fire off shots to Zack's cut which backs him off enough that Alf can pick his leg back up and scoot safely back in.

 

COLE

Alf knows that you need BOTH feet to touch the floor to be eliminated, so he took advantage of that and just managed to save his title hopes.

 

COACH

Whew! I need a paper bag here. Or a stiff drink.

 

Zack goes to pull Alf back up, but again Alf takes the advantage back with a stiff punch to the cut on Zack's forehead to knock him back and then follows up with a clothesline to take him down. Alf sits on his knees to catch his breath.

 

COLE

Alf entered at #18 and has been in this match for just over 30 minutes. He's mixed it up with everyone that has been in his way in this match and is now one elimination away from a chance at being World Champion again.

 

CABOOSE

What about Zack? He's been in for over 20 minutes himself and he's got a $100,000 bounty on his head! Zack must be....WHOA!

 

As Cole and Caboose chat, Zack had elbowed out of a dragon suplex attempt by Alf and spun him around, kicking him in the gut and driving him to the mat with a POP Drop!

 

COLE

POP DROP! Zack delivers one of his signature moves!

 

CABOOSE

Throw him out, Zack!

 

Knight pounds the mat with his fists, yelling encouragement to Alf as Zack gets wobbily to his feet, pulling Alf up along with him. Zack holds Alf by the hair and points towards a side of the ring, nodding through the crimson mask he wears.

 

COLE

Here it comes! Zack's ready to win this thing!

 

COACH

NO, DAMMIT!

 

Zack charges towards the ropes, but as he does so, Alf grabs a hold of Zack's hair as well. As they reach the ropes, both men have the same idea and both end up toppling over the top rope. The crowd gasps at the thought of a tie, but Alf lands on the apron as Zack hangs onto the top rope, his legs dangling over the floor. Suddenly, Knight rushes over to that side and drops the briefcase, grabbing Zack around the waist and leg and attempting to pull him free. Officials rush to the scene to try and pull Knight off as Axel quickly rushes to ringside himself.

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

 

CABOOSE

Goddamn wanker! Get him off!

 

Axel reaches ringside and attempts to calm Knight down, telling him that this isn't the way he wants it to end. The reasoning seems to work, as the referees manage to pull Knight away and back him off. Axel follows behind, holding up his hand while stooping down to pick up the briefcase. Zack, seeing that Knight is away, swings up his legs and begins to skin the cat to get back into the ring......

 

 

 

 

*THUMP*

 

 

 

....but as he begins to swing his body back up, Axel takes the briefcase and smacks it against the back of Zack's head!!

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

 

COACH

YES!

 

Zack falls limp, teetering on the top rope as half his body (his legs) are in the ring and the other half hangs above the floor. Alf, shaking the cobwebs from his head and oblivious to the assist from Axel, sees Zack in this precarious position and walks over.

 

COLE

Alf...he sees Zack teetering.

 

COACH

DO IT!!!

 

CABOOSE

Damn that Axel!

 

Alf grabs Zack's feet and pushes them away, sending Zack over the top rope and splatting onto the floor.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Final Elimination: Zack Malibu

Entered: #23

Time of Participation: 22:56

Eliminated: Johnny Jax, Rick Garner, Reject, Leon Rodez

Eliminated by: Alfdogg

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COACH

YESSS!!!! Alf wins!!!

 

*DING DING DING*

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TEH WINNOR~!: Alfdogg

Entered: #18

Time of Participation: 31:21

Eliminated: Jamie O' Hara, Dick Garner, Brock Ausstin, Zack Malibu

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Alf drops to his knees as Magnum Opus: Father Padilla Meets the Perfect Gnat/Howling at the Moon hits to a fairly mixed reaction and Jack Doan rushes into the ring to raise Alf's hand.

 

BUFFER

LLLLadies and gentlemen, the winner of the 2006 Lethal Rumble....AAAAAAALFDOGGGGGGGG!!!!!

 

Alf pumps his fist and catches his breath on the rope as Knight and Axel share a high-five over the fallen Zack Malibu. They look into the ring and applaud the winner, with Axel raising the briefcase and pointing to Alf, telling him "It's yours! You'll get this Thursday"

 

COLE

So Alfdogg is the big winner tonight as he is the man who will now advance to the main event of AngleMania V to face the World Heavyweight Champion, AND he's collected Axel's $100,000 bounty for being the one that eliminated Zack Malibu.

 

CABOOSE

But you have to give a HUGE assist to Axel for that. Zack had this thing won, dammit!

 

COACH

Is that his music playing right now? Is that Zack in the ring getting his hand raised? NO! Zack LOST! The Originals LOST! The Upstarts reign baby, and there ain't a damn thing anyone can do about it.

 

Alf hits the turnbuckles and thrusts his hands into the air as Knight and Axel walk back up the ramp, satisfied that their plan went off without a hitch.

 

COLE

I'll tell you one thing, HeldDOWN this week will be very interesting. Well, ladies and gentlemen, we hope you enjoyed the OAOAST's presentation of AnglePalooza 2006. For Caboose and Coach, I'm Michael Cole, goodnight from Toronto!

 

Alf remains in the ring, celebrating his victory and his new #1 contendership. He hits the turnbuckles again and poses for the crowd as we.....

 

Fade to Black

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A OAOAST ENTERTAINMENT Production

 

DIRECTED BY

Nice Guy Adam

 

WRITTEN BY

PK

Alfdogg

LaParkaYourCar

Ed Wood Caulfield

Zack Malibu

Nice Guy Adam

KC

Ragdoll

Tony149

PFL

Foshi

 

GRAPHICS BY

Papacita

 

PRODUCERS

Mystery Eskimo

KC

Chuck Woolery

Alfdogg

Crystal

Stephen Joseph

Nice Guy Adam

 

CREATIVE CONSULTANT

Patty O'Green

 

OAOAST CREATED BY

CWM

Anglesault

Tony149

 

OAOAST PRESIDENT

EXECUTIVE PRODUCER

Zack Malibu

 

© 2005 OAOAST Entertainment

All Rights Reserved.

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