Tony149 0 Report post Posted February 16, 2006 (edited) Patty, as always, you have free reign to add anything you'd like you. COLE Ladies and gentlemen, last Thursday night Sarcastic Simon and Aliz Spezia met in a one-on-one contest... [quote]While a few observant fans vainly attempt to direct the ref's attention towards what's soon to transpire, [Simon] wields a championship [belt] like a battering ram, sinisterly aiming it directly towards Alix's cute face. But the feisty wrestler, tipped off by the crowd noise, fights him off with a swift gut high kick! The belt falls from his land, as he's left coughing and wheezing like a chain smoker. She pulls him into a frontface lock, looking for a DDT! Yet Simon wildly punches his way out of her grasp. With a smile on his lips, he snares her into a standing head scissors. Before the crowd's chants can inspire it's target for one last rebellion, Simon spikes her head against the metal title with a piledriver! Her skull disgustingly bounces off the metal plating, sapping whatever life is left out of her slender body. The chants seem to come from miles and miles away, as she slips deeper and deeper into blackness, while Simon pushes the belt out of the ring. He returns to make the cover, and Silverman, on cue, comes back to count. 1 2 3[/quote] COLE (CONT'D) ...that saw Simon use the tag team title belt to pick up the victory. An irate Krista Isadora Duncan, tag team partner of Alix Spezia, demanded a match with Simon, but OAOAST officials did her one better. They have signed a World Tag Team Title match between C.O.D. and the New New Midnight Express for February 26th at Zero Hour. CABOOSE Which happens to take place in the girls' backyard, Los Angeles. COACH Give credit where credit is due, baby boy. OAOAST officials had nothing to do with the signing of this match. That sole honor belongs to the greatest GM in professional sports today, my good friend, Axel. He's the one who booked the tag title match for Zero Hour because the man smelled money -- big money! The more money he makes for the company, the more he gets paid and the happier the Donald is. Buffalo Bill may oversee OAOAST operations, but Mr. Trump signs all the checks. And as long as the money keeps flowing in hand over fist, the Axel administration will remain in power no matter how hard Watts and that teacher's pet Zack Malibu try to oust him. CABOOSE All we need now is a pre-recorded comment saying, "I'm Axel and I approve this ad." COLE As a matter of fact, we're going to go to some pre-recorded comments from the New New Mid-- COACH What are you trying to say, Caboose? CABOOSE Wipe the brown off your nose, Coachman. COACH Maybe you'd like to step inside the ring. CABOOSE That's one of the best ideas you've ever had, Coach. The crowd ROARS as Caboose gets up from his seat and towers over Coach. COLE Gentlemen, please. We have a show to do. COACH You're right, Mikey. The Coach is a [i]professional[/i]. Learn the meaning of the word, 'Boosey. The Coach's and Caboose's mics are turned off as they argue in the background. COLE While I try to play peacemaker out here, let's hear these pre-recorded comments from the World Tag Team Champions. (to Coach and Caboose) Come on, guys. Knock it off. CABOOSE I'll knock you off! CUT TO: Sarcastic Simon and Narcissistic Ned in front of a backdrop of the world famous "HOLLYWOOD" sign. The World Tag Team Titles draped over their shoulders, the duo look as smug as ever in their silver vests, gold chains and sunglasses. SIMON It seems as though Ned and I have causd Krista Isadora Duncan and all her feminist friends to burn their bras in protest over my big win last week. To all of you I say: Shave your armpits, you stupid broads! :lol: Apparently Krissy is pretty prissy about the way I scored the 1-2-3 over her life-- (comically shakes head) I mean tag team partner Alix Spezia. And for what? I didn't hit sweet little Alix with a foreign object, I won the match fair and square with a piledriver. And the last time I checked we weren't in Memphis, and a piledriver is considered a legal move in the OAOAST. NED I don't think their beef is with the piledriver, Simon. SIMON How can they have any beef when they're nothing but skin and bones?! :lol: They're like those anorexic sisters that are constantly featured on The Insider, except they wrestle. You see, when Alix decided to put her cute little wabbit tail inside the squared circle, she became just another [i]wrestler[/i]. You wanna fight with the men, you're gonna get treated like a man. Besides, isn't that what you girls are all about -- equality? Or just when it benefits YOU? Get over yourselves. You make me SICK to be socially liberal! NED Testify, brother Simon. SIMON Unlike that bitter hag, Krista, I still have youth on my side. So not only am I wrinkle free, but my memory is flawless, and it's telling me that all four of us have driven down this road before. Have we not? Let me take you back in a time. A little under a year ago, you two were riding high, coasting on the wave of momentum you built up after you upset Zack Malibu and Dan Black at Anglepalooza to win these tag team titles. After that you went through Black T, GPX, all the supposedly great tag teams to defend your titles, and all these so called wrestling experts, who are nothing but thirty year old shut-in's posting on message boards in between their circle jerks over the newest OAOAST diva's magazine, they were all making outrageous predictions about how long your title reign would last. Five months, seven months, a whole year! No one could beat you is what they said! And when the contract got signed for you to take on Ned and myself in Los Angeles at Living Angelously, everyone naturally assumed this would be the second of many pay per view title defenses for you. No one, outside of myself, and Ned wanted to believe we had anything more then a puncher's chance of beating you. Not in your hometown. It was impossible. It couldn't be done. The crowd would take us out of our game is what they said. You'd walk right over us. Didn't happen. We won. It was hard. Ned left with a bloodied face, I left with a sore neck, but we left with the belts. (Simon pauses to catch his breath) SIMON After that match you walked out of that arena, through your hometown crowd, and you weren't seen again for months. So while Alix was out in the public eye doing her best job to make Paris Hilton look like Aristotle, and Krista was on [i]Regis and Kelly[/i] telling flabby soccer moms across the globe how to get a better bikini BUTT, we were beating the tar out of those pretty boy canucks Marvin and Melvin Nerdly, and making life an unending hell for the Heavenly Rockers. But now you're back, ladies, and you want to test the path fate's laid out for you. You want to unseat us from our throne at the top of the tag team kingdom. Already I can hear the shirll voices of the pundits saying that Simon and Ned are heading for another short, forgetable tag title reign. "Krista's nearly unbeatable, they say, hometown advantage, they say." Yada,yada,yada, whatever. Ladies, allow me to inform you of something. You live in a city where there are two types of people, somebodies and nobodies. Right now you're at the top of the first group, and if you have an inkling of what's healthy for you, you'll stay the hell away from us, because we'll bust you down to the second group before little Maya can sing “I saw mama kissing Mrs.Calus” NED February 26, Zero Hour, Los Angeles, California. C.O.D. vs. the hottest tag team in the sport today for the World Tag Team Championship. I gotta hand it to you, Krista, men really are your property and you continue to play them like fools. Once again you have gotten your way. It wasn't enough that you took my daughter away from me, now you have to go out and take the one thing that means the most to me in this world...outside of my daughter, of course...the OAOAST Tag Team Championship. It ain't gonna happen, honey. Unlike you and that twig you call a partner, Simon and I get in done in the ring, not in the boardroom and not in the courtroom, the ring. As much as it will pain me to know our daughter will once again witness her mother get her ass kicked, the tag team championship is one thing you'll never be able to take from me. Ever. Come the 26th of February the world will know who wears the pants in our family. I'm going to hit you hard, Krista, and this time only I'll experience the pleasure from it. SIMON & NED :lol: Edited February 17, 2006 by Patty O'Green Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
