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Bruce Blank

Promo: Getting all nice and Legal

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”I ain’t no manager Bruce” Wayne complains (for the 50ieth time) as they get out of the truck.


“Well no one is hiring you as a wrestler, we need some way to make it legal for you to be back stage and come to the ring with me” Bruce states as they begin to heard towards a building with the sign “State Athletic Committee”


“But a manager? I ain’t no Mr. Fu-Jay!” Wayne whines.


“Look at it this way, either you get a manager’s license or Janus and his security team declares open season on Wayne Blank – Do you want that?” Bruce asks.


“So you’re afraid of Janus?”


“Got nothing to do with Janus, I ain’t fraid of him or anyone else” Bruce says


“You’re afraid of Rickmen” Wayne mutters


“What’s that?”


“Erm… “you’re ain’t fraid of no man” is what I said” Wayne quickly says to cover up. “So if you’re not afraid of him, why do this?”


“What did daddy always say?”


“I’m going for cigarettes?” Wayne says not sure where Bruce is going with this.


“No dumbass! He said “Pick your battles” and that’s what I’m gonna do. We get you legally in the door and we don’t even have to think twice about Janus or his little security detail, we can focus on what’s important.”


“YEAH!!... dinner right?” Wayne says with a smile


*Sigh* “Just remember all those tapes we watched” Bruce says hoping to god that his brother is able to pass the test, it’d be the first test Wayne EVER passed.


“Yeah, yeah I done seen them all: Heenan, Cornette, Hart, Fu-Jay and on and on – I got this bro, I mean how smart do you have to be to get a manager’s license?” Wayne says with all the confidence of a man who’s very confident.


“Just go in there and take the test” Bruce says and points to the front door.


“Alright, alright keep your britches on” Wayne says with a smirk, he’s got this handled.


*** Ten Minutes later ***


Wayne is in the examination room with the test booklet in front of him and 2 chewed up #2 pencils at the ready – not #1 or #3 or the much maligned #4, but good old “State approved” #2


“Alright gentlemen, open your booklets to page one – you have 1 hour to answer the 40 multiple choice questions” the exam supervisor says as he starts the clock.


40 questions?? Wayne didn’t think there’d be quite that many, he figured they’d ask him like 5 questions and he could fake them – this was not good at all he thought as he begins to panic while flipping through the page after page of questions.


“Alright Wayne, calm down and do what you usually do when I doubt – FAKE IT!” He quietly says to himself as he grabs a pencil and turns to question number one.


Scenario: You are the manager of the pretty successful tag-team known as the Hartfoundation but you see great things in this brother team from Quebec – what do you do?


(1) Stick with the Hartfoundation, they deserve your loyalty

(2) Release the Hartfoundation from their contracts before you talk to the other team

(3) Sign a match where the winners get your services.

(4) Sign the other team as well as the Hartfoundation, what do you care if the Harts are screwed over you get paid either way.


Wayne sits there for like 10 minutes and just stares at the question in front of him, the pencil hovering over the paper. Then finally he closes his eyes and picks option 2 randomly.


“Ah now that was easy”


Question 2


Scenario: Ted Dibiase approaches you and wants to buy the contract for one member in your “Family”, a person who’s not been winning that much lately but could do well as Ted Dibiase’s slave. – What do you do?


(1) Refuse. Family is thicker than cash

(2) Ask. If the family member is okay with it then sell the contract

(3) Give him away. He’s obviously not flourishing under your management, maybe a change of pace will help.

(4) Sell him. The loser isn’t making you money otherwise, may as well make some cash on selling his contract.


“Ah Crap” Wayne says out loud but is quickly shushed by everyone in the room. This would apparently be a VERY long day for Wayne.


*** 90 minutes later ***


Bruce has been pacing in the parking lot for the last 30 minutes or so, waiting for Wayne to come out and tell him his test score and hopefully bring his brand new manager’s license with him. When Wayne finally appears Bruce draws a sigh of relief, Wayne looks pretty pleased.


“So you got the license?”


“Yup sure do bro” Wayne says as he holds up a plastic card.


“I’m sorry for doubting you Wayne, I wasn’t sure you’d pass the test” Bruce says with a smile.


“I didn’t”


Well that’s the end of that smile


“I got 4 out of 40 right, I was close thought Bruce – real close, just 16 more and this here license would actually have had MY name on it” Wayne says as he hands the card over to Bruce.


Bruce looks at the card, the picture sure isn’t Wayne and the name says “Juan Lopez Villalobos Jr.”


“So you stole a license?” Bruce asks.


“Yup, should have done that before I even took the dang test. Steve still does fake IDs and stuff right?”


“Yeah” Bruce says “That’s quick thinking Wayne”


“You know we should have done that in the first place, I don’t do well on tests”


“Yeah I know Bro, why pass a test when you can cheat” Bruce says


“That’s what mama taught me” Wayne says as he puts the stolen Manager’s License in his back pocket and heads for the truck.


Well at least now Wayne APPEARS to be legally licensed as Bruce’s manager, and who really checks paperwork in wrestling? I mean that’s like expecting people to really retire in a “retirement match”.


* Fade Out *

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Guest The Satanic Angel

GREAT promo! Loved the exchanges between Bruce and Wayne. Way to get around the whole test, thing. ;-)

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