King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted March 23, 2006 The mish-mashed stylings of "Word Up" by Korn pound through the arena as we return to the Haitch Dee, accompanying the trio of The Triple Threat to the ring. The 6-Man Tag Team Champions Nick, Dick and Rick emerge onto the stage, all wearing their identical ring attire making them virtually indistinguishable from the others as they pull down their hoods in unison, holding three fingers to the sky. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall! On the way to the ring, being accompanied to the ring by his brothers Nick and Rick Garner. From Green Bay, Wisconsin...he weighs in at two hundred and twenty five pounds. One third of the OAOAST 6-Man World Tag Team Champions... DDIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKK GGAAAAARRRRRRNNEEEEERRRRRRRR!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Well this should be a tough test here for Garner, who's obviously used to the tag team environment, having to compete in singles action against a former X-Division Champion. But he hasn't come alone tonight. All three Garners are coming to the ring and I don't envy referee Nick Patrick tonight. COACH No doubt. The ref's gotta keep his eye on Dick and not get distracted by the other men around him. Otherwise, he's gonna lose sight of the Dick and he might get taken advantage of from behind. CABOOSE Kill me now. The Triple Threat enter the ring together and the confused referee asks for Nick and Rick to leave the ring. They oblige (assuming they are actually Nick and Rick), leaving Patrick to feel Dick up and down...for weapons. Check your inhibitions at the door people. [b]*GOOOOONG!*[/b] "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" "C'mon man" "DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK..." The crowd jump to their feet and groove along to the sounds of "Mama Said Knock You Out" and the entrance of the former X-Division Champion, Leon Rodez. In a belated St. Patricks Day green, Rodez does a quick spin in the entrance to show off his shimmering robe before hand-slapping his way down the aisle. COLE And his opponent! Proudly hailing from Grand Rapids, Michigan and weighing two hundred, twenty eight pounds... "SILKY SMOOTH"... LLLLEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOONN RRRROOOOOOOOOODDEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Vaulting to the ring apron, Rodez salutes his army of fans before springing into the ring. Rodez quickly disrobes and we see that the rib injury is still present, as tape is still wrapped around the injured body area. Meanwhile, Dick goes into conference with Nick and Rick on the outside, looking a little uncomfortable without his ever present fellow triplets on the apron with him. Removing his 6-Man Tag Title, Dick hands the gold to Rick (or Nick) and the triplets exchange and last series of encouraging high-fives before Dick turns to the centre of the ring and goes through some quick stretches. Across the ring Rodez comes up clear of weapons and jigs out of his corner, looking a little bemused by the fact that the Garners look EXACTLY ALIKE~ but shaking it off. COLE This is a last warm-up for Leon as he heads into AngleMania V, looking to finally dethrone Tha Puerto Rican of his 24/7 Championship. But you have to wonder how wise this is, taking up a match 10 days from AngleMania, considering the rib injury he suffered just two weeks ago. CABOOSE You don't need to wonder anything. It's a dumb move. Rodez is dumb. End of story. *DINGDINGDING!* The bell sounds and Rodez immediately skids across the mat, swiping out at the legs of Dick with and attempted sweep which Dick only just avoids. Rodez comes back up and the two men lock up. Grabbing a quick side headlock, Dick confidently smiles out at his brothers, apparantly feeling this singles match deal isn't a tough as people make out. His confidence is misplaced though, as Rodez fires off a forearm to the ribs. And a second. Rodez then backs Dick into the ropes and pushes him off the other side, striding in...only to get knocked down by Dick, who completes the patented Velocity opening sequence with a shoulder block (P.S, read my Velocity recaps on TSM, shill.). Smirking, Dick flexes his muscles as Rodez rolls to the ropes and favours his ribs. COACH Wow, look at those veins on Dick just throbbing out through the skin! What muscularity! Rodez accepts defeat and now offers up a knucklelock. Swatting the hand away, Dick grabs another side headlock and wrenches up on the head. Again Rodez goes to the ribs and sends Dick off, again giving him a running start. But this time, no shoulder block is coming as Rodez drops down and forces Dick to vault over top. On runs the 6-Man specialist and he rebounds off the ropes, right into a beautiful standing dropkick from Rodez, who dives straight into the cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Instinctively Dick scrambles across the ring and extends a hand for a tag. If there were anyone to tag it might be a smart move, but as it is it's pretty darned dumb. Rodez catches Dick in the corner, pulling him back by the tights and nailing Dick with a right hand! Rodez lands another...and another, before making a break for the ropes... ...and stumbling back, as one of the Garner triplets trips his leg from the outside! The crowd howl at referee Patrick to do something and despite not seeing what happened, he warns Nick and Rick anyway, while Dick takes out Rodez with a stiff clothesline! COLE I don't understand why Nick Patrick isn't throwing these two out of here. Their presence out here is going to be nothing but trouble out here and he should know that. CABOOSE Come on Mikey, they're triplets. Where one goes, so do the others. COLE They're not conjoined! CABOOSE No but they're close family. You didn't complain when we had Melody Nerdly sitting out here last week. COLE Yeah, but she wasn't interfering in the match like Rick and/or Nick. Dick rises to his feet and locks knuckles with the kneeling Rodez, pulling his arm away from his body and simply PUNTING Rodez in his injured ribs! Another punting kick finds it's mark and Rodez is writhing now, going into retreat as he shuffles backwards into the corner. Dick follows in and Leon desperately kicks out at him in defence. The boot gets swatted away though and Dick instead slams his boot into Leon's ribs. Nick and Rick shout encouragement as Dick begins to stomp a mudhole and walk it dry, bah gawd, putting the boots to Rodez until Patrick is forced to intervene. Dick backs off briefly, but once his warning is taken in, he brushes past Patrick and grabs Rodez by the legs. Instictively Rodez grabs the ropes but instead of pulling out, Dick pulls up, hurling Rodez upwards into the air and catching him on the way down with a Sitout Powerbomb! 1... 2... Kickout! Pulling Rodez to his feet with him, Dick drags Rodez to the centre of the ring. A scoop and a slam follows, before Dick begins his usual tactics of working on the legs, picking up Rodez's limp right leg and attempting to pull it from it's thigh socket! Despite the knee surgery being two years ago, Rodez still reacts in pain to the tugging at the knee, especially as Dick does it again. Folding up the leg, Dick then places Rodez's foot on the mat with his knee sticking upright...and double stomps down on the knee, compressing the rest of the leg underneath his 225 pound bodyweight!! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE What do you think PRL is thinking now that Dick's going after the leg suddenly and abandoning the injured ribs, 'Boose? CABOOSE I doubt PRL cares. Aside from the fact that he'll beat Rodez whether he's 40%, 60% or 100%, if Rodez has a bad knee he won't climb a ladder in 10 days. Dick now has a focus and stalks Rodez as he writhes on the canvas, stomping on the knee again. Dick then pulls Rodez back to his feet and ducks in at the side, folding Rodez's leg up again and this time hoisting him up, going for a shinbreaker. However, Rodez manages to shift his weight in mid-air and tumbles behind Garner, bringing him down with a sunset flip... 1... Dick rolls through and comes to his feet, spinning around Rodez's right leg and looking for a figure four leglock. A foot in the ass prevents that though and Dick is sent stumbling forward, crashing chest first into the turnbuckles in front of him. Back staggers Dick and Rodez shuffles around behind him, re-positioning himself to again take Dick down into a sunset flip pin... 1... 2... Kickout! Both men roll backwards and back to their feet. However, one of those men has a bad knee. And that bad knee causes Rodez to slow up momentarily, allowing Dick to capitalise with a basement dropkick that sends the right leg lurching out from underneath the Silky Smooth One! COACH Dick thrusting right through Rodez there with penetrative force! Rodez drops to one knee and nurses the bad leg, while Dick scrambles back up. Applying a front facelock, the 6-Man Tag Champion swings a clubbing forearm over the back of Leon to soften him up before taking him up and over with a crisp vertical suplex. "YOU'RE A DICK!" "YOU'RE A DICK!" "YOU'RE A DICK!" "YOU'RE A DICK!" The fans state the obvious and Dick isn't sure for a moment whether the chants are complimentary or derogatory. Of course, they're the latter and Dick eventually figures it out. Pulling Rodez back to his feet, Dick backs him into the corner and demands the crowd pipe down, as he buries a knee into the abdomen. Dick lands another two knees before then hooking Rodez's right leg over the middle rope. Too pre-occupied with his ribs to defend himself, Rodez is easy pickings as Dick hits the ropes beside the adjacent corner, charging across the ring with a facewash style kick right to the right leg!! Rodez promptly collapses to the mat and clutches his knee in agony, while Dick poses for the crowd. COLE At this rate Leon is going to have a real tough time at AngleMania V, because Dick is in control. CABOOSE At this rate, Rodez isn't even gonna make it to AngleMania V. Dick again brings the hobbling Rodez up and simply kicks him across the hamstring to drop him to one knee, giving him the opportunity to run the ropes. As he charges back though, Dick gets sidestepped by Rodez...and as he rebounds a second time, Rodez intercepts him with a desperation clothesline! Dick rolls out of the ring to collect his thought and his brothers gather around him, while referee Nick Patrick checks on the condition of Rodez and makes sure he's okay to continue. Rodez gives the thumbs up as Dick rolls back into the ring...looking suspiciously fresh and recovered as he suddenly jumps upon Rodez and pounds him to the ground with clubbing forearm after clubbing forearm. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Woah...woah, wait, is that Dick? CABOOSE You talking about the match or just daydreaming again? COLE The match! I think The Triple Threat just pulled a switcheroo! The referee seems none the wiset, but the fans nearest The Triple Threat certainly seem to be protesting about something. And one of the Garners on the floor is suspiciously nursing his neck, as 'Dick' now stomps away on the ribs of Rodez. Ignoring the protests from the referee, 'Dick' now hooks Rodez up in a front facelock and knees him in the gut, before hooking Rodez up in a gutwrench and twisting him around into a modified tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Rodez groans in pain, as 'Dick' hurriedly makes the pin... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE You can't tell me that that's Dick in the ring guys, there was obviously a switch! CABOOSE Oh, stop being so suspicious. Just because they look alike, doesn't mean you can discriminate against them. Dragging Leon nearer to the ropes, 'Dick' places a foot on the middle rope. After a quick pause to taunt the fans, he then springs up and gets big height on a kneedrop to the ribs! 'Dick' uses the middle rope as a launchpad to again drop the knee before going for a third. As he gets airborne though, a foot suddenly becomes lodged in his backside and is used to push him up, over the top rope and to the floor! Again the Garners at ringside gather around their fallen brother and Patrick again goes to check on Rodez. Suspecting something is up, Rodez doesn't wait around to allow a distraction though and instead uses Patrick as a way to pull himself to his feet, hobbling over to the ropes and propelling himself over the top rope with a pescado which wipes out all three of the Triple Threat!! "YYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Oh! I think they all landed on Dick! They could have squashed Dick flat! "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" Rodez gingerly comes back up and fires up the fans before turning back to the 6-Man Tag Champions. Unsure of who is Dick, who is Nick and who is Rick, Rodez simply takes the nearest Garner to him and tosses him back into the ring. Patrick naturally assumes it's Dick and allows the action to continue, as Rodez slowly makes a climb to the apron and then up to the top rope. Pulling himself up in the middle of the ring, Dick turns around in search of Leon. He turns the wrong way though and allows Rodez time to steady himself up top and soar off with a Ricky Steamboat esque Crossbody Block, landing atop Dick with the cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Rolling away, Rodez pulls himself up in the corner. By the time he's to his feet though Rodez is forced to stop as the other two Garners enter the ring and help Dick back to his feet. Patrick orders the offending Garners out of the ring and seems to have everything under control. Until, that is, the Garners line up beside each other and begin to jink in and out of each other, eventually coming to a stop in a completely different line-up! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE What is this, a New York street corner!?! Stop with the games damnit! This isn't 3 card monty, this is wrestling! CABOOSE What's the problem? You've seen enough Dicks in your time to know what they look like Mikey, you go up there and tell Patrick who's who. COLE Don't you start! Rodez moves forward looking to attack but Patrick stops him because he's confused as to which Garner is which...but that allows one of the Garners, presumably Dick, to spring from the pack and charge at Rodez. However, he doesn't reckon on being backbody dropped by The Silky Smooth One! Seeing his brother in trouble, Rick now charges forward, but Rodez nails him with a right hand. And to complete the set, Nick runs into a back elbow that lands under the jaw and snaps the neck back, dropping Nick to the mat. All three Triple Threat members pull themselves up and Rodez boots the middle Garner in the gut before grabbing the other two Garners from the side and ramming the heads together with a TRIPLE Noggin Knocker~! Two of the Garners go down and those people with video footage can argue otherwise, but that leaves Dick in the ring with Rodez. CABOOSE Well, I'm lost. COLE Ditto. Groggy, Dick wobbles around on the spot and as a result he is wide open for a Jab! A jab! A jab! A jab! A jab! Leon turns to the fans and blows the kiss... COACH Dick looks a little flacid right about now... COLE Stop that! ...and Rodez LANDS the enziguriI! MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT! Down goes Dick, bouncing off the canvas and rolling face-up as Rodez bounces off the ropes. Rodez's initial plan seems to be an elbowdrop, but for some reason he fakes out and goes back to the ropes. Much more leisurely this time, Rodez jigs back, shuffles the shoulders, brushes some dirt off and drops the fist right to the forehead! "YYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" CABOOSE HEY! COLE The 5 Knuckle Shuffle! And we all know who uses that move... CABOOSE Yeah, Tha Puerto Rican! I told you he was just a Puerto Rican wannabee, he stole that move from him! COLE Technically, PRL stole it from John Cena. CABOOSE Yeah well, nobody cares about that no talent hack, people will not stand for this disrespect of Tha Puerto Rican! Rodez pushes straight back up and now the pain in his ribs is at the back of his mind as he limps across the ring, crouching down and waiting for Dick to pull himself back up. Slowly the 6-man tag specialist does so and stumbles around looking for his opponent. As he finds said opponent, Dick desperately charges and looks to take Rodez's head off with a big clothesline. Rodez is well prepared however, ducking his head and catching Dick under the arm, hoisting him up and planting him with a Rock Bottom! Straight back up comes Rodez and now, it's time for the coup de grais as Leon kicks Dick's arm over his chest, pulls off his elbowpad and throws it into the crowd. The crowd go wild as Rodez does some weird hand gestures before hitting the ropes. There's the vault over, there's the rebound, Corporate Eyebrow...and The People's Elbow!! Dick quivers on the mat as Rodez pops back up and bows for the fans! CABOOSE DAMNIT MAKE IT STOP! COLE Hey, it's PRL Appreciation Night, maybe Leon's just showing his appreciation. CABOOSE The HELL he is! He's making a mockery out of Tha Puerto Rican! Not done yet, Rodez now drags Dick towards the corner and exits to the apron. Nick or Rick quickly jumps to the apron, but his wild charge at Rodez is evaded and he ends up running himself into the ringpost and toppling back to ringside! That allows Rodez to scale the turnbuckles and give the signal, before tumbling off with the 450 Splash to Dick, the cover not far behind... 1... 2... 3!!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" *DINGDINGDING!* The crowd erupt for Rodez as he cooly acknowledges his victory with a smile and a wink to two screaming blondes in the 3rd row. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner... "SILKY SMOOTH"... LEON RRRROOOODDEEEEEZZZZZZZ!! "YYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Rodez rolls from the ring and pats one of the fallen Garners on his closely shaven head on his way back up the ramp, a slight limp still in his stride as he leaves. The fans continue to celebrate and Rodez gives them a last departing wave before he disappears back through the entrance doors, not hanging around now that his job is done. COLE Well I guess Leon has somewhere important to be. But consider the message sent, Caboose. Leon Rodez is going to AngleMania and he's got his sights set on Tha Puerto Rican and the 24/7 Championship! CABOOSE Well beating some 6-Man Tag wrestler out of his comfort zone isn't going to impress anyone, especially not Tha Puerto Rican. COLE What about the Rock Bottom, that was pretty impressive. CABOOSE It's not the Rock Bottom! It's the Latin Slam and it was a pale comparison compared to Tha Puerto Rican! Leon Rodez is a pale comparison! And the world is gonna find that out at AngleMania when Tha Puerto Rican climbs the Corporate Ladder and retains his 24/7 Championship. Beating Dick Garner is one thing. Beating PRL with the 24/7 Championship is a feat that no-one has accomplished. No-one! COLE And that may just change in 10 days time! CABOOSE Bah, you're just a mindless shill. COLE :O Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
