Crystal interview/Crystal vs. The Marv

[CanadianChick 0]

COLE

Welcome back, and we all hope you’re enjoying the show so far! Tonight, our main event is…

 

“EXCUSE ME!”

 

The camera pans to the entrance way as the fans’ jeers get louder as everyone recognizes the voice.

 

“I DEMAND your attention!”

 

The fans continue booing as CRYSTAL, with the big man GUNNER SHARPS, makes her way to the ring with a microphone in hand.

 

CABOOSE

Oh boy…

 

CRYSTAL

Do you people not realize that you are living a moment in history? You people get to hear the first real interview from the greatest female wrestler in OAOAST history in about 4 months!

 

COLE

That’s debatable…we’ve had many great female wrestlers in OAOAST.

 

COACH

Puh-leeze Cole! Mah baby gurl is the only female OAOAST Heavyweight Champion! No competition.

 

CRYSTAL

The honour of interviewing my re-debut can only go to one person. Only one person can handle such a task, and only one person deserves this opportunity!

 

COLE

I had no idea Crystal feels so highly about one of our colleagues…

 

CRYSTAL

And that person is…GUNNER SHARPS!

 

COLE

…nevermind.

 

The fans are madly jeering already, and the “interview” hasn’t even started yet.

 

GUNNER

So Ms. Crystal Adams, where have you been during your much needed break and why come back now?

 

CRYSTAL

A much needed break it was! See, running off the women’s division was tough work. I had to pull many a string to get those wannabes deserted in HI-OH, or whatever that shit-hole federation is called in Japan. Instead of stepping in my spotlight, little Jenny is rotting away in Japan. Have fun being a big fish in a very, very small fishbowl Jenny! I wish I could take credit for that skank Alix and that tight ass, supposed liberated feminist Krista but hey, that was just good timing. Now who’s the only dominant female that is not whoring themselves out of the ring for a man?

 

GUNNER

Why, I believe that is you Crystal!

 

CRYSTAL

Right you are! There is truly only room for one timeless female talent, and that certainly doesn’t include a division of wannabes and a comedy tag team. Crystal will be the dominant female on HeldDown until the day I retire.

 

GUNNER

Why go after the 24/7 Title?

 

CRYSTAL

What better way to make an impact? There’s nothing like gold to have people take notice. See, I don’t need to be the “hardest worker”. In my younger days, I did because I felt that was the only way to get noticed. But in my wiser age now? I’ll leave the hard work to the Zack Malibus, Leon Rodezs and all of them. All I need is my brain, and let me tell you Gunner, it’s a valuable tool. While all the idiots are working oh-so very hard to gain the approval of you idiots…

 

“BOOOO!”

 

CRYSTAL

…and to gain gold, I just have to have a perfect plan and BAM! I’m a champion. Now Gunner, let me ask you a question, one you have been asked all week! Why be the body guard of the Crown Jewel of OAOAST?

 

GUNNER

Well Crystal, it’s quite simple. I’ve been ignored long enough, and an old friend of mine, who just happens to be the most talented wrestler in the wrestling world today, offered me a way back, and a nice sum of money later, she had herself a deal. As long as I’m around Crystal, no one will get their hands on that 24/7 title around your waist.

 

CRYSTAL

Gunner, you flatter me so much! Okay then, let’s bring out the first challenger for my precious 24/7 Title. And Gunner will be here at ringside to make sure there is no funny business.

 

COLE

Yeah, I’m so sure that’s what he’s there for…

 

COACH

Oh the lack of faith you have Cole!

 

CUE: “Temperature” by Sean Paul

 

“YEAHHHH!”

 

There is no fancy pyro for The Marv today, and he looks cautious coming down to the ring. Well, wouldn’t you be with Gunner right there?

 

BUFFER

Now residing in Laguna Beach, California, he weighs in at 185 pounds, he is THE MARV of the SK8TER BOIZ!

 

“MARV! MARV! MARV!”

 

BUFFER

And his opponent, being seconded by Gunner Sharps, residing in Coquitlam, B.C., she weighs in at 155 pounds, she is the 24/7 Champion and the claimed Crowned Jewel of the OAOAST, she is CRYSTAL!

 

DING! DING! DING!

 

COLE

Now, here’s a test for Crystal. She hasn’t been in the ring since Feburary, and The Marv is not someone to be taken lightly. He’s a bit stronger than Crystal and is just as fast, if not faster. But, Crystal does have a nearly unmatched technique and has the muscle of Gunner Sharps behind her.

 

The two competitors circle each other and go for the ‘ol collar-and-elbow lockup and The Marv gets an advantage and gets a wristlock on Crystal. Crystal reverses with a tested and true roll through and kip up, which the Marv nearly immediately reverses with a neat handspring reversal and has Crystal in a hammerlock. Crystal struggles for a minute before reversing with a drop toe hold and rolls to lock on an armbar. The Marv stands up in it, forcing Crystal up to, and performs a beautiful armdrag! Before he can capitalize, she is on the ropes, telling him to back off.

 

CRYSTAL

STOP CHEATING! This is suppose to be a CLEAN fight!

 

Rolling his eyes, the Marv backs up. Crystal gets away from the ropes and beckons for Marv to lock up again. When Marv goes for it, Crystal ducks him and goes straight into a waistlock, complete with a waistlock takedown. She cinches on a headlock, which Marv muscles his way up on his feet with on. He grabs her wrist and reverses into a top wristlock and tries to muscle Crystal down to a bridge. However, being the sneaky little you know what that she is, Crystal prevents it from pulling his luscious locks and putting him flat on his back. However, she makes the mistake of gloating to the jeering crowd and doesn’t have time to react as the Marv scissors his legs around Crystal’s head and performing a lightning quick headscissors! The momentum rolls Crystal out of the ring and into the, erm, comforting arms of Gunner. The Marv goes to go after his competitor to win the 24/7 Title, but the ref prevents it.

 

CRYSTAL

BACK OFF PUNK!

 

Crystal whispers something in Gunner’s year before getting back in the ring and getting in Marv’s face. She pushes him and hammers him with a hard forearm! He comes back with a big punch of his own! Crystal looks shocked and gets back in his face with a finger pointed.

 

CRYSTAL

YOU JUST HIT A GIRL!

 

*SLAP!*

 

“Ohhhhh!”

 

COLE

Crystal just slapped the taste out of Marv’s mouth!

 

CABOOSE

Get her!

 

Crystal grabs the ref and puts him in between her and a now enraged Marv before shoving him into Marv and sprinting out of the ring. Before Marv can chase her, Gunner is up on the apron talking trash to Marv and preventing him from going past him. Gunner distracts him long enough for Crystal to sneak behind Marv. Marv turns around into a vicious clothesline!

 

COLE

Give the devil her due, but Crystal, for someone her size, throws a hell of a clothesline. When you have the technique she does, it’s almost as good as having brute strength.

 

Crystal slowly brings up Marv and connects with some vicious knees to the face! She then sends him to the ropes and connects with a back elbow to the jaw. She goes for the pin, but only gets a one count. After scolding the referee to count faster, she sends the Marv to the corner and runs after him, connecting with a hard flying forearm. The Marv slumps the ground and Crystal nonchalantly chokes him with her boot. At the four, Crystal lets go, before giving a b-r-utal knee to the face before choking him for another 4 seconds.

 

COACH

This is what Crystal was talking about earlier. She’s being smart! Instead of expending a whole lot of energy, she’s wearing her opponent down with a simple foot to the throat. Brilliant!

 

CABOOSE

Yeah, no one has EVER thought of that one before.

 

Crystal drags Marv up by the hair and signals for one more time and whips Marv to the opposite corner, but he reverses and Crystal goes crashing chest first into the turnbuckle, stumbling back to a rollup.

 

1!

 

2!

 

Kickout!

 

Crystal gets up right away and goes for a clothesline, but Marv ducks and pins her in a backslide!

 

1!

 

2!

 

Kickout!

 

Both get up at the same time, and Marv goes to grab Crystal, but she uses her nails and attempts to scratch his eyes out. As he’s holding his face in pain, Crystal runs the ropes and connects with a straight kick in the head! He stumbles down on his ass, and Crystal picks him back up, wrings his arm, and does a picture perfect Northern Lights Suplex!

 

1!

 

2!

 

Kickout!

 

Crystal looks slightly annoyed with the 2 count, but prevents herself from complaining and picks Marv up, only to snapmare him back down. She grabs his shoulders and does 5 quick knees to his back in succession. Crystal runs the ropes and Marv gets a dropkick to the back! Crystal throws him on his back and covers.

 

1!

 

2!

 

Kickout!

 

Crystal now is looking a little more annoyed and yells at the ref and bit before picking Marv back up and whipping him to ropes, going for a spinning heel kick. Marv ducks and comes back from the second rope with a cross body!

 

1!

 

2!

 

Kickout!

 

Crystal stumbles up as Marv gives some solid punches before going back and running towards Crystal, but Crystal sees it coming and launches him over the top rope she’s near. But Marv lands on the apron and turns Crystal around to punch her some more. When she is good and dazed, Marv holds on to the top rope and with the leverage, does a modified pele kick! Crystal stumbles back the middle of the ring and Marv springboards from the top rope and rolls over Crystal and has Crystal trapped in a sunset flip!

 

1!

 

2!

 

Kickout!

 

Gunner nearly cries in relief as Crystal barely kicks out of the pin. He decides that action needs to be taken as Marv runs the ropes, and trips the Sk8er Boi up. Marv gets right back up and kicks Gunner in the face through the first and second rope. But he made the carnal mistake of turning his back on Crystal, who takes advantage of the situation once more a delivers a soon to be renamed Edge-o-matic!

 

COACH

That move BETTER be renamed!

 

I just said that Coach! Geesh. Anyways, instead of going for the cover Crystal poses for her fans (who are showering with chants of “CRYSTAL SUCKS!”) and in a very cocky matter, drags up Marv and hooks him up in a front face lock and screams “IT’S OVER!”.

 

COACH

She’s going for the Newton’s Law!

 

COLE

Newton’s Law, which is also known as the OrangeCrusher, isn’t a move Crystal goes for often.

 

CABOOSE

But Marv still outweighs her, even if it isn’t by that much.

 

Crystal lifts up Marv with ease, looking to finish the match, only for Marv to slip behind her and give her an inverted DDT and knock them both down!

 

COLE

What a reversal! Whoever gets up first has a distinct advantage here!

 

COACH

C’mon Crystal!!!

 

1!

 

2!

 

3!

 

4!

 

5!

 

6!

 

Both Marv and Crystal are stirring…

 

7!

 

Crystal is up…

 

8!

 

And so is the Marv!

 

Crystal charges Marv for a clothesline, but he ducks! She rebounds off the ropes only to be met with a textbook leg lariat! She stumbles up to a kick in the gut and snap suplex! The Marv keeps the front face lock, runs towards the corner, and takes Crystal down once more with a tornado DDT!

 

1!

 

2!

 

2.5!

 

Kickout!

 

Not discouraged, Marv picks up Crystal, only to be met with a cheap poke in the eye by Crystal! She then runs the ropes and performs a tilt-a-whirl head scissors…only for it to be turned into a tilt-a-whirl powerbomb by the one and only Marv!

 

1!

 

2!

 

2.5!

 

Kickout!

 

COACH

That was way too fast counting!

 

CABOOSE

Aw Coach, you’re just upset that your girl underestimated Marv!

 

Marv signals that it is indeed the end, as he sets up for the G-Spot Jiggy, but Crystal elbows her way out of it and gives a hard boot in the gut followed by a snappy fisherman suplex!

 

1!

 

2!

 

2.5!

 

Kickout!

 

Crystal, irate, yells at the referee to “graduate from Grade 1 and learn to count to three” and ascends the top rope to goes for…who knows what.

 

COLE

She could be going for anything here, as Crystal knows her way in the air.

 

Instead of going for something right away, she takes her time, which proves to be her down fall as Marv sprints up to meet her day and knock her down in a sitting position. He jumps up and hits a hurricanarana…only to have Crystal not go down with him because Gunner was holding onto her! Marv lies limply on the mat as Crystal quickly shakes the cobwebs and hits her long time move, the Diamond in the Rough!

 

1!

 

2!

 

3!

 

DING! DING! DING!

 

BUFFER

And your winner, and still the 24/7 champion…CRYSTAL!

 

“BOOO!”

 

COLE

If it wasn’t for that damn Gunner, The Marv could have very well won that title!

 

COACH

But what did Crystal say earlier? It’s all about the brains baby!

 

Gunner hoists Crystal up on his shoulder, reminiscing of Liz and Savage, except much less romantic and much less touching. We fade to commercial on a close up of the 24/7 Title and a smirking Crystal.