Tony149 0 Report post Posted August 30, 2006 I'm not sure why the name Rico de Janerio (from Brazil) popped into my head, so I did a search to see if maybe I had remembered it from Alf's WC but found nothing. Michael Buffer stands mid-ring, microphone in hand. In the background are the assigned referee and jobber. BUFFER The following contest, one fall with a 10 minute time limit. Your referee for the bout, Nick Patrick. Introducing first, already in the ring to my left...hailing from Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, 220 pounds...RICO DE JANEIRO! Rico, sporting a PORNO MUSTACHE~!, receives a lukewarm response as he waves to the crowd in typical jobber fashion. The same cannot be said for the playing of AC/DC's "Money Talks", which the 9-5ers in attendence bombared with boos the moment it hits in contempt for the man it accompanies to the ring... [b][color=#999900]$[/color] [color=#009900]THEODORE MONEYMAKER[/color] [color=#999900]$[/color][/b] "The Billion Dollar Heir" climbs the steps onto the apron, requesting that the referee hold the ropes for him to enter. Once inside, Moneymaker spreads his arms like an eagle would its wings, boasting in his wealth and ruggedly handsome features. BUFFER And his opponent... Theodore stops ring announcer Michael Buffer in mid-sentence. THEODORE Cut the music. As everyone knows, "The Billion Dollar Heir" is marking his return to the ring. So tonight calls for something special. Since this is my first match in months, I want to be able to work on my in-ring conditioning, and wrestling you, little man, sure isn't gonna help. Let's be honest, you're nothing more than a late-season call up. A wrestler management brought up from the OAOVW to experience the big leagues. You're no threat to me. In fact, you're no threat to yourself. I happen to know for a fact, as an independent contractor, you're only being paid a measly $100 to work tonight. So I tell you what I'm gonna do. As an incentive for you to compete to the best of your ability, I'm gonna up the ante. If you can somehow find a way to beat me I will pay you $1,000. "YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE $1,000? Wow! THEODORE You heard me right, baby. An extra $1,000 if you, Rico, can beat "The Billion Dollar Heir" by pinfall, submission, countout or disqualification. But if I win...you must kiss my feet. Whaddya say? Deal or no deal? COACH I hope Rico brought his chapstick. Then again, he can always borrow yours, Mikey. Either way, Rico de Janerio's gonna pucker up. Rico ponders the challenge, staring out into the cheering crowd who urge him to accept. Rico nods in agreement, drawing a loud ROAR. Theodore laughs maniacally...and is decked by Rico! COLE Go get him, young man. COACH How can you root for a man who cheapshots people, Cole. COLE Like Theodore wouldn't have done the same. Rico just beat him to the punch. Literally and figuratively. * DING DING DING * Driven by the prospect of earning an extra 1,000 dollar if he can win the match, Rico leads an offensive charge that leaves Theodore rocking and reeling. Teddy is clotheslined outside but lands on his feet, only to be pulled up onto the apron by the hair and suplexed inside the ring! COLE He's got him! Rico's going to win the thousand dollars! ONE... TWO... TH-- KICKOUT! Rico stays on the attack, whipping Theodore to the ropes and backdropping him over the top, following it up with a standing dropkick flush to the jaw! ONE... TWO... THR-- NO! COLE Foot on the ropes! Oh, man. Rico de Janerio a half a count away from going home $1,000 richer. "RICO!" "RICO!" "RICO!" COACH Why am I not surprised the fans have latched onto Rico? He's a loser just like them. COLE It's the underdog factor that has rallied this great crowd behind Rico, Coach. Media outlets from around the world are here tonight to cover Theodore Moneymaker's return to the ring. If Rico can pull off the upset, he'll become a star overnight. And right now he's wrestling the match of his career. COACH Teddy hasn't even had a chance to take off his smoking jacket and pants yet. Feeding off the energy from the crowd, Rico rams Teddy face-first into the buckle. What occurs next is the ultimate reversal of fortunes as Theodore counters Rico's Irish whip, sending him for the ride to the far corner where de Janerio leaps to the second rope and back at Moneymaker, who ducks, causing Rico not only to crash and burn but also gut the hearts of those hoping for the upset. Moneymaker proceeds to lay a major league beatdown, kicking Rico hard upside the head while removing his jacket. Next piece of clothing to go is his tear-away pants, revealing gold knee pads to go along with his green trunks and boots with $ signs on side underneath. He slumps de Janerio in a corner and... * CHOP * "WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" ...chops the hell out of him. Teddy shoots Rico to the ropes, and drills a back elbow straight to the heart on the rebound. He scoopes Rico up for a vertical suplex, the concussion echoing throughout the arena. Moneymaker relentless in his attack, firing de Janerio again to the ropes, snapping him over with a powerslam. Theodore pops up and drops a FISTFUL OF DOLLARS onto Rico's face. Signaling the end is up, Teddy locks Rico in the...BANK VAULT! COLE There it is. We saw Theodore use that move a few weeks ago. That corba clutch sleeper he calls the Bank Vault. COACH That's just the first number of the 3 Code Combination. You'll see what I mean. Theodore spins Rico around and plants him near the corner with a belly-to-belly suplex, then connects with a DIVING BACK ELBOW from the second rope! COACH What did I tell you? Teddy told me about it earlier today. ONE... TWO... THREE! * DING DING DING * BUFFER Here is your winner... THEODORE MONEYMAKER! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Teddy grabs the mic. THEODORE A deal's a deal, Rico. I put my money where my mouth is. Now it's time for you to live up to your end of the bargin and pucker up. Look on the bright side, at least you have a story to tell your grandkids one day that doesn't involve you being a loser. Wait a minute. Yes, it does! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Teddy shoves Rico's face into the toe of his boot, forcing him to kiss his feet as "Money Talks" blares overhead. Cue the replay. COLE An impressive showing by Theodore Moneymaker. He may be a narcissistic egomanic, but you can't take anything away from his in-ring ability. I'm sure we'll be hearing alot more from him in the weeks and months to come. Right now let's... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
