Tony149 0 Report post Posted October 5, 2006 (edited) BUFFER The following contest, one fall with a 10 minute time limit. When the bell rings your referee in charge of the action, UK Hall of Fame official Sir Miles Manchester. Introducing first, already in the ring to my left, from Ireland..."Scottish" Scott and Danny Boy, the E.U.! Scott and Danny flash the "peace sign" and are booed heavily. No one likes European assholes, but everybody loves gay luchadors! Humidity's risin' Barometer's getting low According to all sources The street's the place to go BUFFER Their opponents...from sunny, funny Cabo San Lucas in Mexico, weighing in at 340 pounds, Mariachi and Moracca...LOS DIABLOS DE FUEGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Pink and yellow lights flash across the arena as gingerbread men supplied by Mrs. Spezia's Sweeties fall from the ceiling. Los Diablos de Fuego dance onto the stage and CART WHEEL to the ring! Rather than give his sombrero to the hottest hombre he sees, Moracca gives it to a little girl in the front row carrying her Los Diablos mascot sheep doll. But it's not just any little girl. It's MAYA BLANCHARD, daughter of Ned Blanchard and Krista Isadora Duncan, who happily accepts the gift! COACH Look at that, Mikey. Moracca's trying to brainwash little Maya into thinking his lifestyle is acceptable. And what kind of a mother is Krista, leaving her child Maya with the babysitter--who's a major fox, by the way. You better believe Ned Blanchard would never leave his child in the hands of a stranger. COLE Krista is in the area on business, I know that. She's been advising Alix Spezia in her bid to expand the reach of Mrs. Spezia's Sweeties products. Alix's venture into the world of baked goods a successful one thus far. Everyone in the OAOAST certainly wishes them the best in their life away from the squared circle. And we're moments away from in-ring action. Scottish Scott and Danny Boy have their work cut out for them in their OAOAST return following a year long absence against Los Diablos de Fuego. Moracca and Mariachi still recovering from the henious assault at the hands of Los Conquistadors, orchestrated by the Beverly Hills Blonds and funded by Theodore Moneymaker. As a matter of fact, OAOAST cameras managed to catch up with them earlier today. Los Diablos have spent hours trying to learn the English language, and they've come along way in a short time. Let's hear their pre-recorded comments. [color=#FF9900][b]* WHOOSH *[/b][/color] The picture-in-picture box flies into view and settles in the upper right hand corner of the screen. Los Diablos nicely attired in their matching pink ponchos and sombreros. Mariachi staring seductively into the camera, sucking on the middle prong of his pitch fork! MORACCA Hola, damas y caballeros. Los Diablos de Fuego with un mensaje para Los Conquistadors and Beverly Hills Blonds. You made us taste body fluid other than semen, and that was sangre -- our blood! Let no man put asunder. We will not let your bigotry hold us down, "amigos." MARIACHI Moracca and I did not cross the border and hitch a ride in the back of a scorching hot trailer to for us to come short of living the American dream. Our path to citizenship rides on marrying an American woman or winning the tag team championship. And since we are sexually deviant rape fetishists, unfamiliar and confused by the customs and norms of your hetrosexual society, that leaves us only with the option of becoming los campeones del mundo. MORACCA Unfortunately, an innocent bystander has been caught in the crossfire of this intense battle...our beloved mascot El Ovéja. Dios es mi testigo, you hurt him...we hurt you. MARIACHI (jabbing pitch fork at camera) We cut you. We cut you real good, man. MORACCA Queering don't make world right say you? No, señor. We're not homos. MARIACHI We're homies. El mejor equipo de etiqueta en Mehico and Latin America. The best tag team in our homeland and Latin America. LOS DIABLOS :D :D [b]* WHOOSH *[/b] COACH Drama queens. * DING DING DING * Moracca and Scottish Scott start for their respective teams. And Scott dictates the pace of the match early, wringing the arm out of a collar-and-elbow tie-up...but Moracca performs a cart wheel and somersault in succession, kipping up and not only reverses the arm wrench but adds insult to injury by sensually rub his opponent's hands against his genitals! "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" The Scotsman isn't as amused as the fans are, physically shaken and mentally disturbed. Moracca performs a lightning quick armdrag, and even quicker to his feet to deliver a Fameasser! Moracca lands on his side and immediately rolls around to the feet of Scott, locking the legs. COLE Estacas Indias, or Indian Deathlock in English. The flaming luchador flips up and over, bringing The Hot Scot to his feet in a front facelock and tags in Mariachi, kissing him on the cheek! Moracaa fails to caution Scott the ring may be SLIPPERY WHEN WET! Mariachi springboards off the top and crashes all his weight down onto the chest of Scottish Scott with a SEATED SENTON into a compromising pinning position, shoving his genitalia in Scotty's face! ONE... TWO... KICKOUT! Mariachi forward rolls to the E.U. corner and cops a feel. "The Fighting Irishman" Danny Boy none to thrill about that, and proves his point by demanding the tag. Scottish Scott eager to comply after what he's been put through. Danny spits in his hands and rubs them together in anticipation of locking horns with the flamboyant Mariachi, who answers by caressing his nipples! COACH How do you prepare for [i]that[/i], Mikey? No wonder the Beverly Hills Blonds didn't want to wrestle Los Diablos. One night in the ring with them leaves you scarred for life. COLE I wouldn't say that. I've spent a night out on the town with Moracca and Mariachi and had a blast. COACH Do you even think before you speak? Danny and Mariachi lock up, ending with the Irishman sneaking in a knee to the gut and a fury of European uppercuts. Mariachi shaken but not stirred, rattling off a series of overhand chops to the chest. Danny hooks both arms and headbutts Mariachi repeatedly, spinning him around to clamp on a rear waistlock...causing Mariachi to leap up and roll through. Rather than try and get the pin on a victory roll, Mariachi turns Danny on his stomach and places him in a inverted surfboard! COLE La Tapatía! And what a painful hold this is. We could have a submission any moment now. COACH ... COLE Before you ask, Coach...I did my homework. Scottish Scott steps in to breakup the submission, but Moracca cuts him off and locks on a REAR NAKED CHOKE COMPLETE WITH DRY HUMPING! COACH My eyes! My eyes! COLE We've just upset half the country back home! Mariachi wants in on the fun, releasing the surfboard so he can ride Danny Boy like a horse, slapping him upside the ass while yelling “Giddy up!” With Moracca putting Scott out like a light, he and Mariachi look to finish off Danny. They whip him to the ropes and hit their patented DOUBLE TILT-A-WHIRL PANCAKE, slamming Danny Boy face down onto the canvas! Los Diablos motion for their spike tombstone piledriver, drawing the fans out of their seats as Moracca jumps from the second rope...THE SODOMIZER!! The cover is made in yet another compromising position (69)! ONE... TWO... THREE! * DING DING DING * It's raining men - Hallejulah It's raining men - Amen It's raining men - Hallejulah It's raining men - Amen BUFFER Here are your winners...LOS DIABLOS DE FUEGO! It's all fun and games after the match. Moracca and Mariachi celebrating the only way they know how, bumping and grinding on each other! Referee Miles Manchester tending to Danny Boy in the background, making sure he didn't suffer any serious injury from the Sodomizer. The replay is cued up and narrated by Coach, but stops midway through as we cut back live to the arena as BLACK T hit the ring and deck Miles! COLE My God, they struck an official! COACH Not just any official, but the one assigned to their championship match this past Sunday night at World Without End. You know, the same official who called the match...which was the right decision, by the way. The former tag team titleholders are viewed favorably as they lay a beatdown on the senior citizen. Tony tears open Miles shirt and holds him up for Dan, who wails away on the older timer, chopping the hide off his chest. Black T are so out of control Scottish Scott and Danny Boy have to pry them away from the referee. Dan and Tony respond by dishing out another ass-kicking! The Trans-Atlantic Wrecking Crew beating the holy hell outta the E.U. Scottish Scott experiences a BLACKOUT, while Tony gives Danny an ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT and drops the Irishman on his head again! But they aren't done yet. They want to punish the man who only did his job at World Without End some more, whipping him to the ropes for... "3-BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" ...3-B, the Black Body Bag! Manchester convulsing on the spot. Still, that doesn't stop Dan Black from going to the top...DIVING HEADBUTT! Tony Brannigan isn't done yet either...RUDE AWAKENING! COLE Black T taking out their frustrations on the E.U. and Miles Manchester! I don't agree with this at all. Yes, I know they're upset, but attacking a referee -- which is wrong no matter what -- isn't going to solve their problems. Dan grabs the microphone and is ready to speak... BLACK :huh: ...but Tony rips the mic out of his hand and proceeds to lay down Brannigan's Law. EMTs and OAOAST officials assisting referee Manchester backstage. TONY Cut the music! Drek Stone, Hoff...you guys don't want to live to see old age, do you? How else would you explain sticking your noses in Black T business? It's a sad day when the heavyweight champion of the world has to resort to backhanded tatics like jumping somebody from behind. When I was World Champion, if I had a problem with a guy I'd tell them to their face and then knock them on their ass. None of this hit and run bullshit. Because of you and Hoff, former World Champion-turned lacky, Black T no longer reign surpreme over the tag ranks. Mr. Black and I could sit out here and tell a sob story that would make us the most sympathetic characters in the world, but we don't want any sympathy. You know what we want? Payback! It's one thing to mess with Black T, it's another to cost us the World tag team championship; ask Miles Manchester what it's like to get on our bad side once he comes to, because it's obvious we haven't settled anything in our past. So let's finish what we started earlier in the year. I want YOU, Drek Stone, one on one. "YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" Black does a double take. Not the comment he expected to hear. TONY (CONT'D) Man to man. I want you and the World title. You took my belt...now I'm gonna take yours! Tony slams the mic down and exits. Black stays behind, puzzled in the ring. "Quiet" blaring overhead. COLE Tony Brannigan just dropped a bomb on the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion. He wants to settle the score once and for all. How will the champion respond? Hopefully we'll find out tonight. Edited October 5, 2006 by Tony149 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
