Tony149 0 Report post Posted November 2, 2006 Tacked on at end is post-match promo [b]And now OAOAST BACKTRACKER, brought to you by [color=#009900]The[/color] [color=#999900]Enterprise[/color][/b] TWO WEEKS AGO [quote]As Moracca checks on Mariachi in the ring, the BEVERLY HILLS BLONDS and LOS CONQUISATADORS strike! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Moracca catches them coming in out of the corner of his eye, but is unable to fend off the 4 on 1 attack on his own. Los Conquistadors decking him with their BARB WIRE-wrapped fists, slicing Moracca open! The Blonds get in on the action, shooting him into the ropes and...DOUBLE FEATURE FLAPJACK...splash Moracca down onto Mariachi. Simon and Ned use their belts to keep OAOAST officials at bay, threatening to whip anyone who dare enters as Los Conquistadors tie Los Diablos in the ropes and feel El Ovéja up right in front of them! COLE How disgusting! Los Conquistadors molesting the masoct of Los Diablos de Fuego. There's no need for this. No need at all. Damn them! Los Conquistadors open up El Ovéja blow hole and take turns sticking their fingers into it, giggling like school girls as it deflats. Los Diablos shed tears for their beloved mascot, then blood as Uno and Dos dig their barb wire fists into the forehead! In one last cruel act, Los Conquistadors shred El apart with the barb wire, leaving what's left of it scattered across the ring in little pieces to the delight of the Blonds.[/quote] [b]This has been OAOAST BACKTRACKER, presented by [color=#009900]The[/color] [color=#999900]Enterprise[/color][/b] You say its urgent Make it fast, make it urgent Do it quick, do it urgent Gotta rush, make it urgent BUFFER Tthe following contest, one fall with a 15 minute time limit. Introducing first, from the OAOAST First Responders Unit...EMT TIM and OFFICER BOSLEY...RESCUE 911~! Because real men don't respect authority Rescue 911 are booed by the male base in attendence, but cheered wildly by the ladies who love a man in uniform, especially two studs like Bosley and Tim who send chills down their backs just by winking at them. COLE Let me tell you what I love about the OAOAST, ladies and gentlemen. Today's athletes would demand immediate title bouts and matches with high-profile opponents. Not in the OAOAST. Here you have two young men, in Rescue 911, trying to establish a name for themselves by taking on some of the best tag teams in the OAOAST. Their record may be less-than-steller, true, but their defeats will go a long way in developing their character and skills as wrestlers. Sometimes you gotta fail to succeed, and I have a gut feeling we'll hear a lot from Rescue 911 in the years to come. COACH Geez, could you suck their d... Call me (call me) on the line Call me, call me any, anytime BUFFER Their opponents, representing The Enterprise and accompanied to the ring by their business consultant MACKENZIE DECENZO...from Beverly Hills, 90210, here are Simon Singleton and Ned Blanchard...THE BEVERLY HILLS BLLLLLLOOOONDSSSSSSSSS! The Blonds make their red carpet arrival to much fanfare. The trio walk toward the ring and the white light caused by all the flashing bulbs from on-lookers wanting to snap a picture of greatness. Fortunately for the Blonds, they have protection in the form of highly expensive sunglasses! COACH Now here is a team you should be singing the praises of, Mikey. You know, actual winners. 3-time World tag team champions. Rich AND famous. COLE There's no disputing the greatness of the Beverly Hills Blonds. Their attitude on the other hand... COACH ...is modern, baby. Ever since they dumped that old-timer Jim Cornette for Mackenzie DeCenzo, their wallets have gotten fatter and the mainstream is dying for these guys to hawk their products. COLE Say what you will about Jim Cornette, but the man instilled respect for the sport in Simon and Ned. Now all they respect is money and power. Take the piece of footage we saw moments ago featuring the mishandling of Los Diablos de Fuego. It's fitting the Blonds would end up with two other men who feel the same in fellow Enterprise associates Theodore Moneymaker and Christian Wright. Mackenzie DeCenzo sets up shop ringside. Stage hands placing her DIRECTOR'S CHAIR in the Blonds corner. She takes her seat and cheers on Simon and Ned. * DING DING * After the pop and circumstance is over, the bell is rung and both teams are ready to go. Ned Blanchard and EMT Tim lean in for a lockup, but the Handsome Hustler pulls away at the last second and kicks Timmy in the gut. With his opponent stunned Ned unloads with heavy rights. He shoots the medic to the ropes and knocks him off his feet, driving the back of the elbow into the chest. Blanchard motions to the corner as he pulls the officer up, and rams him into the knee of Simon Singleton! Now the legal man Simon isolates Tim in the corner and delivers stinging knife-edge chops and forearm blows. SIMON Whoooooooooo! (to Officer Bosley) :P Tim's backed against the ropes and clubbed hard across the shoulders. Simon stays on the attack, whipping Tim to the far side and drills him with a brutal dropkick flush to the jaw. Simon then decks Officer Bosley, allowing him and Ned to hit their DOUBLE FEATURE FLAPJACK on EMT Tim! COLE The Blonds about to put Rescue 911 out of their misery. Here's the cover. ONE... TWO... SIMON :huh: KICKOUT!? According to Simon, whose exaggerated facial expressions would lead you to believe Tim is Hulking Up on him despite the fact he leapt up on his own. Ned helps EMT Tim back to his feet and wags his finger in Simon's face Hogan style, brother, even going as far as to cup the ear! COACH Oh, my God! He IS Hulking Up! COLE Give me a break. The Blonds treating this match like a joke. How embarrassing it must be for Tim, a man who serves his community as an EMT when not wrestling, being humiliated on worldwide television. Tim knows it as well and fights back, landing an elbow upside Blanchard's head! Simon goes right for Tim's eyes, jabbing the thumb into the socket, something that would stop any man outside of a low blow. Tim is on the verge of being smashed into the top turnbuckle when he puts his foot on the middle rope, effectively blocking the move, then catches Singleton with an elbow to the gut and sends him into the buckle instead! The EMT wails away on Simon, hip tossing him out of the corner and back into the ropes to tag fellow First Responder Officer Bosley. The 6'5" officer and a gentleman patiently waits on the apron as Tim Irish whips Simon, leveling him on the rebound with a back elbow. He then slingshots Bosley into the ring...BIG SPLASH! ONE... TWO... TH--KICKOUT! Rattled, Simon instinctively drives his knee into the gut as he's brought up and heads to the top. Double axe handle...INTO A BOOT TO THE FACE! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!" Bosley quickly follows up with a fisherman's suplex! ONE... TWO... THREE--NO! The pin is broken up by Ned, who's scolded on the way back to his corner by referee Earl Hebner. Little does Blanchard know, since he spends too much time jawing with ringside fans, a tag has been made. Officer Bosley scoopes Simon in a bearhug as EMT Tim springboards to the top and nails a dropkick! ONE... TWO... THR-- KICKOUT! The inexperience of Tim is evident when he sends Simon in for a ride towards his side of the ring, enabling him to make a blind tag to the Handsome Hustler. Not realizing his mistake at the time Tim then makes the error of tipping his next move, lowering his head for a backdrop. The veteran Singleton sees it and leapfrogs over the top, all while continuing his stride across the ring. Tim keeps his focus on Simon since he didn't see the tag, leaving himself vulnerable from behind, and like a shark smelling blood in the water Ned Blanchard steps in and CLIPS Tim's legs as Simon simultaneously wallops him with a SPINNING WHEEL KICK! COACH DAYUM~! COLE Welcome to the pros, kid. That's just great tag team wrestling on the part of the Beverly Hills Blonds. They exploited the rookie's mistake and made him pay dearly. But the Blonds aren't prepared to end the bout anytime soon. Still upset from being shown up by Rescue 911, the Blonds plan to film more fight scenes before calling it a wrap. Ned re-shoots the turnbuckle scene from earlier, where Tim blocked Simon's turnbuckle smash, but he's unable to do so here. Blanchard hammers the EMT in the corner, stomping a mudhole and walking it dry. MACKENZIE (directing) Beautiful. Beautiful, Neddy. Now give me a suplex and an elbow smash from the top. One take is all Blanchard needs to perform both moves. Simon is then called to the set. Ned turning over the reigns to his partner. The Blonds introducing a new double-team maneuver to their already vast arsenal, a back suplex suplex that sees Simon float over and splash down onto his opponent! COACH Wow. That like a [u]jump cut[/u] you'd see in a 1930s movie. The Blonds are innovative, no doubt about it. ONE... TWO... KICKOUT! COACH On, come on. Accept the fact you're gonna lose Bosley. COLE Rescue 911 didn't come to here to collect a pay check, they came to win. And until that 3 count is made they believe they still have a chance. COACH Not if Ned hits this. Coach is speaking of the SLINGSHOT SUPLEX, which is perfectly executed. Officer Bosley tries to buy his partner some time by entering the ring and refusing to exit. The Blonds are too smart for that. They know every trick in the book and even added some! So they make an exchange and climb to the top of opposite corners. Bosley doing a heckuva job distracting the referee, but will it be enough to stop the dropping of the ATOMIC BLOND? YES! Thanks to two people dressed as SHEEP. They swipe the Blonds legs out from under them, crotching Simon and Ned on the turnbuckles! The Blonds straddle the top rope before falling back inside the ring, both rising to their feet in excruciating pain as they hold onto the family jewels. Mackenzie flipping out over what she's seeing. She rushes backstage as the Sheeps follow the Blonds in and... SIMON :o ...wipe Simon out to the floor with a double dropkick! Ned staggers his way into the arms of one of the sheep who scoops him up for a tombstone, the crowd erupting as they now realize the men under the blood stained sheep heads. The other sheep dives off the middle rope...THE SODIMIZER! COACH It's Los Diablos de Fuego! COLE Oh, now we don't know that. I don't recall Moracca and Mariachi ever wearing sheep heads. COACH Los Diablos, El Ovéja. Put two and two together, stupid! Officer Bosley conveniently ends his unwarranted questioning of referee Hebner as the Sheeps leave to a hero's reception. Tim crawls over and covers Ned! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COLE Mackenzie DeCenzo on her way back with the rest of The Enterprise, Theodore Moneymaker and Christian Wright. COACH Hurry up, fellas. Hurry! ONE... COLE They're not gonna make it on time. COACH (urgently) Yes, they will. Yes, they will. TWO... Christian Wright is first to the ring, sliding in under the bottom rope and drops a... THREE! ...double axe handle onto Tim's back, but it's too late! "YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" * DING DING DING DING * BUFFER Here are your winners...RESCUE 911~! Theodore and Christian kick EMT Tim out of the ring in a fit of rage while Mackenzie throws a tantrum outside, screaming at the top of her lungs. Wright and Moneymaker want answers, but they're not getting them from the referee. Earl steps out on the floor and raises the hands of an exuberant Rescue 911. COLE Officer Bosley and EMT Tim pick up their first win thanks to a little help from...giant sheep! COACH A little help? That was a lotta help! How can Rescue 911 accept a win like that? I know I couldn't. COLE Believe me, a lot of people would, and you'd be one of them. What a wild night it's been, and there's still more to come! Stay with us! HeldDOWN~! continues after this brief time out. Still photo: Earl Hebner raising the hands of Rescue 911. [i]Urgent, urgent, emergency Urgent, urgent, emergency Urgent, urgent, emergency Urgent, urgent, emergency[/i] Back from break, and backstage in the Enterprise locker room with Tony Schiavone. The Beverly Hills Blonds going nuts in the background, tossing chairs and luggage. Christian Wright and Mackenzie DeCenzo trying to calm them down. SCHIAVONE We're back live on the air. A very chaotic situation, to say the least. The Beverly Hills Blonds downed by Rescue 911 moments ago on TS-- SIMON For guys who are supposed to protect and serve, Rescue 911 sure did a lot of rulebreaking. They used closed fists, made numerous illegal saves and purposely distracted the referee while Los Diablos de Fuego, like the little bandits that they are, stole the match right out from under us. You saw it. Everybody saw it. We had that match won, damnit! SCHIAVONE There's no denying you guys had the match won on a number of occasions, but rather than go for the pin you decided to toy around with your opponents, and it came back to bite you. THEODORE Shut your trap and open your ears, little man. People try to portray us as racist for our problems with Los Diablos. Uh-uh. It isn't about race. No, it's bigger than that. It's about money. MY MONEY! They tried to get rich and famous off my name. Every entertainment program and magazine covered the incident where Los Diablos drove me face-first into the steel ramp and kissed me. Kissed me, little man. And these weren't two chicks either. Now...now I'm gonna drive them out of the OAOAST and out of the country! NED (shouting) They keep baiting us. They keep baiting us, man. SCHIAVONE (to camera) Yeah, well, I'd say it's the other way around. Michael, I think Los Diablos de Fuego just got themselves a little payback for what the Blonds did to their beloved mascot last week. Back to you. 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