Gotta date tomorrow; drunk tonight.

[k thx 0]

1) It's a great concept

2) Fuck you Slayer

3) I'm not resurecting it, I'm doing a callback

4) I'm awesome

[Guest Richard McBeef]

Board literotica is amusing in small doses, so let's stop while we're ahead.

[Slayer 0]

It's a great concept

Any schmuck on this board can grab stories from asstr.org and use Find-Replace to substitute names of TSM posters for the original characters, so, no, it isn't

[Slayer 0]

Inc stroking his own cock while rimming FFMS, Inc jacking off slowly, his uncut cock making it more slippery.

And it's not even accurate!

 

It's been fairly well established that Inc is cut, a phrase which, in a nutshell, sums up everything wrong with TSM

[k thx 0]

I'm not some shmuck

 

And Inc lied about his penis. It's the only sensible explaination.

[Lord of The Curry 0]

So how did the date go?

[k thx 0]

"Turn around; I want to eat your hairy hole!" FFMS said.

 

It went quite well, from the sound of things.

[Lord of The Curry 0]

This is one of the more "normal" Inc threads, which makes me all the more wary that the date was never happening. I do totally believe he was drunk when he posted this, though.

[Art Sandusky 0]

Spoony, yuou look like the sort of person who'd burn.

I do if I'm a dumbass and don't put on any sunscreen, but that's just about anyone. I can develop a helluva tan if I try though.

[k thx 0]

Get the tan. Russians (or at least Estonians) love it.

[Art Sandusky 0]

Most people 'round here have a fine tan by the middle of May, so that's my target. If you're pale in the middle of July in Charleston, you either work nights or totally suck.

[k thx 0]

When do you get yours?

[Art Sandusky 0]

Whenever the hell I feel like it.

[k thx 0]

Thrilling.

 

She'll be putty in your hands.

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

What an awful date. SHE DON'T TALK GOOD.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

I hung out at the beach with a bud's girlfriend and her hot, single Russian friend today. Her name is Lena. Seriously.

 

The universe is probably going to explode.

 

I burn way too easily. Im still almost fire engine red in certain spots from my really bad sunburn last year. I end up using SPF 45 and I still burn pretty easy if I dont put it on repeatedly.

[Guest Richard McBeef]

When I went to Disney World several years ago, all my sunscreen washed off. That was a painful week.

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

I abhor sunlight, which, really, is a shame, as I can tan to a lovely golden brown were I to just spend a little outdoor time shirtless. As such, I have quite a farmer's tan—not baseball player- or, um, farmer-levels, but a farmer's tan nonetheless.

[The Niggardly King 0]

My brother is a lot more light skinned than I am, and will actually get sunburned.

 

I just look a bit darker. Like 3 shades below a Wesley Snipes.

[Guest Richard McBeef]

How do you live in Florida and abhor sunshine?

[The Niggardly King 0]

yeah

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

I had yet to harbor a disdain for the sun at the age of four.

[Art Sandusky 0]

I started out not liking the sun, but the older and more vain I become, the more I enjoy the feeling of those rays.

[Hank Kingsley 0]

Yeah man, I took living by the beach for granted until I came to this school. Gimme the Gulf of Mexico now.

[Guest Vitamin X]

How do you live in Florida and abhor sunshine?

 

Very easily, especially if you live in Miami. I actually would set up blackout curtains and do everything to keep them around my window since the natural sunlight there was so awfully bright, burning and hot.

 

Oregon and California are much nicer to me there.

[k thx 0]

goth

[EL BRUJ0 0]

you rang?

 

What an awful date. SHE DON'T TALK GOOD.

 

 

the date was set up through mutual pals, wasn't it?

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

Nah, she was someone I saw in a record store. Ice was broken over music-related matters; I didn't have time to talk to her as much as I would've liked, so, since she was cute, I asked her out for the hell of it. She accepted.

 

A few days later, during the date, I discovered she wasn't much of a talker. In fact, she told me that about three times, each time being one of the rare moments where she thought to contribute to the conversation. If it weren't for the fact that she followed up each of those confessions with a sheepish apology; that she laughed at all my moments of wit and smiled at my engaging manner (which, by the end of that hellishly long 90 minutes, I was very much forcing); the fact that she called me earlier, leaving a voice mail just a few hours ago, inquiring if maybe we could get together again...if it weren't for all that, I'd wonder if her reserved behavior during the date was more her being horribly bored by me, rather than her being socially inept.

[EL BRUJ0 0]

Sounds like she had first date jitters...

 

So when's the second date?