Tony149 0 Report post Posted July 19, 2007 (edited) BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest, to a finish…LAST MAN STANDING! To achieve victory you must incapacitate your opponents for a count of 10. “Heart-Shaped Box” hits, the automatic pop it once received gone, replaced by a loud chorus of boos. BUFFER Introducing first, led to the ring by HOLLY-WOOD…from Sin City, total combine weight 432 pounds, the former OAOAST tag team champions of the world and self-proclaimed “greatest rock ‘n’ wrestling band of AAAAALLLL-time“...THE HEAVENLYYYYYYY RRRRRROOOOOOOOOCCKKEEEEEEERRRRRRRSSSSSSS!!! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE If you‘re just tuning in, don’t adjust your television sets. Your hearing is perfectly fine. As unimaginable as it seemed 3 months ago, the Heavenly Rockers have gone from being the most popular tag team in our sport to one of the most despised thanks to their actions at the 6th annual Great Angle Bash. COACH Things change, people change. As evident by this reception. And why? Why are the fans so mad at the Heavenly Rockers? Because they refused to be raped by a couple of young hot shots who tried to take advantage of their generosity? COLE You’re as delusional as the Heavenly Rockers. It’s obvious to me they became jealous of the Lone Star Gunslingers. Synth and Logan were the most popular tag team for such a long time they couldn’t handle it when another team began to cut into their popularity and snapped. COACH Then instead of damning the Heavenly Rockers to hell, blame the fans. They stirred the pot for their own amusement and got burned. After several minutes and no Heavenly Rockers, the music dies, leaving everyone puzzled. Then it’s off backstage to an ongoing shouting match between the Heavenly Rockers and OAOAST agent Terry Taylor. Also present is Logan’s wife Holly, a woman so disinterested in the events transpiring in front of her she kills time reading the July edition of OAOAST Magazine. TAYLOR Enough of the stalling, fellas. Move it. You’re on. LOGAN Nobody’s going to force us to do a damn thing, especially not you, you walking piece of Wrestlecrap. Like I’ve said, if you want the greatest rock ‘n’ wrestling band of all time to perform live, you gotta meet our demands. It‘s written in our contract. But if the OAOAST is going to try and play us like that, get in touch with our lawyers and will gladly see you in court. SYNTH What he said. BARON (Off-Screen) Hey jackasses! Officials swarm the area as the LONE STAR GUNSLINGERS attempt to start our regularly scheduled contest backstage. LOGAN You don’t want none of us. Step over here and we’ll stain the floor with your blood! SYNTH See, Rooster, dat’s why all the fuss. Them fools can‘t be trusted. You saw it. They just tried to jump us. TAYLOR Then take it to the ring. You accepted the challenge. It’s time to see if you can walk the walk. (to the officials) Gentlemen, escort Mr. Mulligan and Windels to the Gorilla position. (to Synth and Logan) You guys stay right here until they‘re out of sight. LOGAN (shouting) Hey Melody, pray your boys get injured walking to the ring, because it won’t hurt nearly as bad as what we’re gonna do to them! MELODY :p It doesn’t take long for the Gunslingers to appear onstage. With Fall Out Boy’s “Thriller” booming over the loud speakers, the most improved tag team come dressed to fight, both wearing jeans and t-shirts, fists taped. Melody on the other hand, she’s like a cartoon character, rocking the same Daisy Duke look as always (and nobody‘s complaining because she‘s hot). BUFFER Wrestling fans, the Heavenly Rockers opponents in this Last Man Standing match hail from San Antonio, Texas, and are accompanied by their manager MELODY NERDLY…JOCK MULLIGAN and BARON WINDELS…THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGERS! “YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!” Melody and the guys return the love from the fans, high-fiving a lucky few on their way to the ring. COLE Here they come, arguably the most popular tag team… COACH Thanks to Melody spamming every MySpace page in existence. COLE …in the sport today, the Lone Star Gunslingers. Tonight they look to extract a measure of revenge against the men who have denied them championship hardware on 3 separate occasions, the Heavenly Rockers. Speak of the devil…! * BOOM * Jock goes down in a heap following a CHAIRSHOT from Synth, who then whips the Gunslinger into the STEEL STEPS before him and Logan gang up on Baron. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE It was a damn set-up! COACH And the Gunslingers fell for it hook, line and sinker. Melody tends to Jock as the Heavenly Rockers pummel Baron to the ground. Overwhelmed by the onslaught the proud Texan continues to try and fight out of the predicament, wildly swinging from his knees… “YYEEEEAAAAHHHHHH!” …but Logan rakes the eyes and tosses Windels inside. As Synth climbs onto the apron Logan spots Melody reaching for the steel chair and steps on it, shaking his head as the Gunslingers gal pal slowly gazes up at the “Macho MACHO” Mann. But Logan refuses to let that be the end of it, threatening to strike Melody with the chair! COLE Oh, no. He wouldn’t dare. Suddenly, Logan is spun around and floored by a Jock Mulligan discus punch. The gentlemen that he is, Jock asks Melody if she’s okay before going to aid Baron, cleaning house on Synth. Irish whip, and both men head off into the ropes, with Jock connecting on a flying lariat. Melody slides a chair inside, the very one that got her up close and personal with Logan Mann, and Jock… * BOOM * …cracks it across the back of the Synthmeister, sending him through the ropes to the floor. COLE A receipt from earlier, no question. Having shaken off the cobwebs, Baron wows the audience with a PLANCHA onto Logan! COACH Even I have to admit that was impressive. You don’t see many 6’7 men diving over the top rope with such ease. Melody fires her imaginary pistols in the air with the excitement of a 5-year-old. Meanwhile, Jock pulls Synth out from underneath the ring. Yes, out from under. But Synth proves he’s more than just a pretty face, or a cowardly lion…THROWING A HANDFUL OF POWDER INTO JOCK’S EYES! COLE Powder in the eyes! My god, somebody please help him! He can’t see! He can’t see, damn it! As Jock stumbles around, desperately wiping his eyes with the ring skirt, Synth regains possession of the steel chair and damn near bashes Jock’s skull in! Not one to play favorites, Synth sprints to the other side of the ring and cold-cocks Baron as well! “HOLLY!” “HOLLY!” “HOLLY!” COLE You hear the chants of “Holly” in the background, the fans want her to come out here and end this. Whether or not she has the power to do so I don’t know. Synth and Logan have gone off the deep end. The Heavenly Rockers prepare to do real damage now that their foes have been neutralized. Logan twirls the FINGER OF DEATH~! as Synth removes the protective pad ringside. COLE Oh, my. I don’t like the looks of this at all. I pray it’s not what I think it is. Melody can’t bear to watch, fleeing backstage. Logan hooks Baron’s head… “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!” …PERCUSSION DDT ONTO THE CONCRETE FLOOR!! COLE :o COACH Your prayers went unanswered, Cole. Not that you should be surprised. I mean, I don’t think the good Lord would appreciate the lifestyle you live. As if that wasn’t enough, Logan adds insult to injury, GRINDING BARON’S FACE INTO THE CONCRETE! COLE Come on, that’s enough! COACH Have you forgotten? Last Man Standing. We still have a match on our hands. And Logan has Baron’s [b][color="#FF0000"]BLOOD[/color][/b] on his, as does the concrete. Synth brings Jock over along with another steel chair. The guys place the chairs on the ground and deliver a DOUBLE DDT! COACH Double the Percussion. COLE And there’s going to be major repercussions stemming from this. LOGAN (to referee) Count ‘em! 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... “YYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Melody returns with HOLLY-WOOD by her side. They rush to the ring, where Melody smartly remains at a safe distance as Holly tries to talk some sense into the Heavenly Rockers, but Logan isn’t having any of it, ignoring what his wife is saying to cuss Melody out. COLE Somebody place security on standby, it’s getting intense ringside. 6... 7... 8... 9... 10! * DINGDINGDING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your last men standing…THE HEAVENLYYYYYYY RRRRRROOOOOOOOOCCKKEEEEEEERRRRRRRSSSSSSS!!! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Logan spits on the bodies of Jock and Baron, then grabs Holly by the arm and roughly whisks her backstage as OAOAST officials and EMTs arrive on the scene. COLE Let’s go to break. There’s nothing left to say or see here. We’ll be back. Edited July 19, 2007 by Tony149 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
