King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted July 26, 2007 Back on HeldDOWN~! and Big Things Poppin' is already playing, as we find James Blonde and his erstwhile Samoan partner Faqu on their way to the ring. BUFFER This tag-team contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing, team number one. First from Vancouver, British Columbia and weighing in at two hundred pounds... JJJAAAAAMMMEEEEEESSS... BBLLLLLOOOOONNDDEEEEEE!! And his tag team partner. Hailing from the Isle of Samoa! He weighs in tonight at three hundred and one pounds... FFFAAAAAAAAAQQUUUUUUUUUU!!! A mixed reception greets the duo as they make their way down the aisle. Blonde leads the way making a confident speech to the nearest camera, leaving Faqu trailing slowly behind. The big Samoan looks stoicly ahead as he climbs the steps. BUFFER And in the ring. First, two hundred ten pounds, from Miami, Florida, TJ MASON! And his partner, from Davenport, Iowa, one hundred eighty six pounds, CAMERON COLE! The two rookies soak up their moment in the spotlight, Wilson letting out a load roar to the cameras as Cole waves to his fellow Iowa natives. Their youthful exuberance doesn't last long once Faqu makes the apron though. Both the unknowns watch on wide-eyed as Faqu steps into the ring and shoots a death glare in their direction. COLE We saw Faqu and Blonde a couple of weeks ago and they were impressive in their victory over Los Diablos De Fuego. And we also saw a different attitude out of these two former HI-YAH superstars. Now, I spoke to them both earlier... well, I saw 'both', I spoke to James Blonde, who also spoke for his partner. And needless to say, they are both very bitter over the takeover of their previous employers, HI-YAH Promotions, by the OAOAST. COACH Can you blame them? Shit's getting out of hand Michael, AngleSault's got some sort of power fix goin' on. First he buys up HI-YAH, now he's buying up WDW, putting people out of work, changing people's lives with the stroke of a pen. And now, guys like Faqu and James Blonde gotta come back to an already over-crowded locker room of like 85 people who get one match every month and a half? Faqu was the HI-YAH Champ for over a year! He was the man! Now, none of it counts for jack! I don't blame them for being pissed. Giving his partner a pat on the back, Blonde agrees to let his partner start. The short straw seems to have been drawn by Cameron Cole on the opposite side. *DINGDINGDING!* COACH Hey, this guy isn't a relative of yours, is he? COLE Not that I'm aware of. Cole bravely walks out of his corner and approaches Faqu, waiting for a lock-up. But Faqu has other ideas, knocking him down flat with an open handed thrust to the throat! "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COACH You know, maybe you should look into it, you might be his next of kin. With Cole left looking up at the lights, Faqu glances over at Wilson. He holds his hands up in penance, as slowly Faqu reaches down and drags Cole to his feet. An irish whip sends Cole forcefully into a neutral corner, so forcefully infact that the already weakened rookie falls back on his ass, sat up against the bottom turnbuckle. And with a loud cry of "SAMOA!", Faqu charges in after his opponent, driving his posterior into Cole's face at full speed!! COACH WOAH! COLE Man, Cameron Cole's head snapped back violently on that move. Where the hell did that come from!? COACH Samoa? Once his head ceases rolling around his shoulders, Cole goes limp against the buckle. Faqu drags him right out and to his feet though, scooping and slamming the youngster down before tagging in the eager James Blonde. Blonde goes straight for Wilson for some reason though, bumping him off the apron before going after Cole. The unneccessary tactic doesn't even draw Wilson into the ring, not that Blonde really cares, as he drops a Double Stomp across the chest of Cole and covers, lazily... 1... 2... No! COLE Not enough, this kid has got that fighting Cole family spirit in him! Blonde shrugs it off and tags Faqu back into the match. A little unprepared for being tagged back in so soon, Faqu takes a second to get into the ring, allowing Cole to start crawling to his corner. A slow, pained crawl, Faqu just strolling past Cameron and kicking him IN THE FACE before he can reach his corner. COACH YO~! COLE Now that was a little unneccessary. However, for some reason, Faqu then picks up and pitches Cole into the corner anyway, allowing the tag to be made. Happy for whatever small mercies he's given, Wilson rushes right into the ring ready to take over... ...and gets bowled over with a hard clothesline from the Samoan Wrecking Ball! COLE Seems like Faqu wants some fresh competition, if that's the right word in this situation. Which it isn't. Gamely getting back to his feet, Wilson at least puts up a fight and throws a forearm. He gets caught by the throat though and shoved back into the enemy corner, Faqu engulfing him in there with an Avalanche a second later! Tag is made and Blonde is legal again. With Wilson still stuck in the corner, behind Faqu's 300 plus pound frame, Blonde gets a run-up from across the ring. Clothesline in the corner, followed up by a Bulldog out of it and James Blonde quickly tells his partner to put the finishing touches on the helpless Wilson, the big Samoan dropping across the spine with a Big Splash and crushing the Floridian! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Damn, that's like a house falling on you! Or at the very least, a pretty large mobile home. Still the beating isn't over though. Blonde sits TJ back up and leans down on the neck, while passing instructions to Faqu. COLE This is nothing more than for display purposes right now. Faqu and Blonde are sending out a message to the OAOAST locker room, through these two young prospects. COACH I don't think these kids have many prospects anymore. Real estate maybe. With the message getting across, Blonde finally pulls TJ up to his feet, dragging him into a short knee to the gut and passing him off. Faqu takes Wilson in with a double underhook and takes him up... ...and DOWN with a Butterfly Piledriver, just spiking the rookie on his head!! COACH Now, that's a message I'd heed. COLE Ditto. Faqu presses Wilson down, no sign of his partner to save... 1... 2... 3!! *DINGDINGDING!* Faqu stands over Wilson and lets out a guttaral roar as his partner strolls over, patting him on the back before tapping his wrist, a not so subtle hint to the referee to raise it in victory. BUFFER Your winners of the match... JAMES BLONDE and FAAAAAQQQUUUUUUUU!!! COLE Dominant, just about the only word to sum that up. James Blonde and Faqu making a big statement here in Des Moines tonight at the expense of what was admittedly some 'lesser' competition. COACH No kidding. One of them was called 'Cole', which is your last name! COLE Thanks for letting me in on that tidbit. As Blonde and Faqu walk away from the carnage left in the ring, Blonde calls over the nearest TV camera. Leaning across the shoulder of the deeply breathing Samoan next to him, a smile fills the face of The Mover From Vancouver. And with a raise of the eyebrows, he ominously warns that this was "just a sign of things to come." before he and Faqu walk off. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
