King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted July 26, 2007 COLE Let's take it backstage, where our colleague Josh Matthews has caught up with The South Central Militia. We're transported back into the hub of all transport, at least transport heading into the arena tonight, the parking lot. (Boy, that was clunky. Even for me.) Vincent Santana and Marcellus Wallace are chilling and generally illing in front of their beat-up car. Vinny chugs away at his 40oz., leant across the hood of the car, with Wallace standing the other side, arms folded. MATTHEWS Hey, Josh Matthews outside the arena here in Des Moines and right now, I'm with one of the teams counting down the days until August 2nd, Minneapolis, Minnesota and the Scramble Cage Tag Title Unification Match. And Vinny, One Eye, it... WALLACE Yo, what did you jus' call me!? Realising his guests aren't quite as 'down' with the J.Math as he was banking on, Matthews stammers a little. MATTHEWS Uh, I... I thought that was your... WALLACE Unless you wanna end up wi'out an eyeball yo'self, ya'll better never call me that again! If I feels like callin' myself that, I will. Vinny, he wanna call me that, that's fine. We crew. You punk, you better watch yo' mouth, heard? With Moe's finger pointed right in his face, Josh certainly made sure he 'heard'. MATTHEWS O... okay. So, uh, to get back on topic... Scramble Cage is coming up in just one week's time and you have the chance to become the first ever, unified One And Only World Tag Team Champions. So... [b]*SMASH!*[/b] The 40oz. crashes into the ground, oz.'s flying everywhere to the shock of Matthews. SANTANA Listen, it's all real simple. Ya'll got six teams and they're gon'be locked up inside a steel cage. It's gonna be a fight. It's gonna be war. Fists gon' be flyin', bodies be flyin', blood, sweat, teeth, all in one lil' steel surrounded battleground. Trill talk, that's how we do in South Central! Me an' One Eye, mah boy Marcellus here, we grew up in South Central L.A, fighting for every opportunity we ever gots in life. We ain't never had a damn thing handed to us by no-one, besides white flags n' bodybags. An' hell, we been locked up our fair share o' times too. So, you wanna lock up twelve of the OAOAST's 'finest' and see who survives, lemme spit game to ya, there ain't nobody gonna fuck wit' us! I mean, for real, you got a couple'a boyband faggots, two apple-pie eatin' college wrestlin' bitches, those West Hollywood motherfuckin' dykes who we still got major beef with... WALLACE And we ain't talkin' bout the roast beef hangin' between Krista's legs neither. MATTHEWS :O SANTANA Then there's Logan an' Synth, 'The Rockers'. Rap v. rock. Well lemme tell ya, they be Aerosmith and we're Run DMC, representin'. We gonna break through that wall and we're gonna kick their skinny, long-haired, trout-lipped asses 'till they shut the hell up, for real! And then... SOUL (off-screen) And then, you got us brothaaaaa. All eyes turn off screen, as in walk RICO DE JANIERO and LUCIUS SOUL, The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew! Sliding off of the car hood, Vinny stands beside Marcellus ready for a fight. Lucius holds up his hands and motions for them to calm down though, Rico just stroking his 'stache in the background. SANTANA Yo, you wanna throw down!? You wanna go!? SOUL Gentlemen, gentlemen, [i]gentlemen[/i]. We couldn't help but overhear you two guys talkin' over here and we just had to come over before ya'll got too far ahead of yo'selves. Now, you and I are not so dissimiliar. Oh no. See, yours truly Lucius Soul, he grew up on the streets too. New Orleans isn't quite South Central I'll admit, but ya know, I feel a kinda kinship with you two. I'm 'down'. WALLACE This goin' somewhere? SOUL Indeed it is! See, mah sources have told me that you two gentlemen are in the field of 'protection', if ya catch my drift. Well, it just so happens that myself and Rico here have a proposition for ya'll. Lucius reaches into the inside pocket of his jacket and pulls out a wad of bills. SOUL Hehheh... go ahead, feast your eyes. This right here my friends is twenty five [i]thousand[/i] of my own dollars. All you've gotta do is make sure me and my main man Rico here... RICO *strokes 'stache* SOUL ...walk outta Minneapolis with those OAO tag straps to replace these here HI-YAH Tag Titles. Taking a second to think about it, The Militia smirk back at Lucius. WALLACE No deal. SOUL Heh... I believe there's some mistake here. See, I was lead to believe that you were 'for hire', wink wink. Doesn't matter who, just how much, that ring any bells for ya both? WALLACE Sounds like somethin' we'd say, yeh. SANTANA But not August 2nd. Scramble Cage dawg, s'all 'bout us. We ain't fightin' for money, we're fightin' for our pride. And we're fightin' for those belts we get straight robbed of! So, you two dress-up pedophile bitches gonna get bitch-slapped 'round that cage just like everybody else, belie'dat! You best spend that cash on life insurance or somethin'. Trying to keep himself cool and collected, Lucius straightens up his jacket and holds his hands up again. SOUL We'll see you guys next week then. No hard feelings. Lucius turns tail and storms off, with Rico shooting a quick glare at The Militia before following after his ranting partner. Watching on, Vinny and Moe smile to themselves as we go back to the arena. COACH Wow, battle of the suggestive ethnic accents or what! I've never seen so many apostrophes! COLE ..... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
