King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted September 6, 2007 BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome... your OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION... "BOOOOOOOOOOOOO..." BUFFER ... LANDON! "LA CUCARACHAAAAAAAAAA"... MMMMMMMAAAAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" [b]"PREPARE...FOR...LANDON!"[/b] [i]...WAAAAAHHHHH... *DUM DUM*[/i] In a change of pace from what you'd usually expect, "Megalomaniac" by Incubus hits, as from behind the curtain steps Megan Skye, heralding the arrival of her man, the World Champion, Landon Maddix! Smug grin on his face, Landon stops at the top of the ramp and raises the World Title in one hand, to widespread boos. COLE Landon Maddix, who escaped with that World Title by the very skin of his teeth at AngleSlam 2007. We knew he'd need a little slice of luck to fall his way to survive the challenge of Zack Malibu and Tha Puerto Rican intact. Little did we know just HOW much luck. Landon and Megan make their way to the ring, continuing to look mighty pleased with themselves. Taking centre stage, Landon picks up the microphone left behind by Buffer and taps it a couple of times to check it's on and to hopefully shut the people up. At least one of those works. MADDIX The Champ is Here, The Champ is Here, The Champ is HERE! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" MADDIX Oh boo, hiss. What is this, pantomime season? Come on people, give it up for your World Heavyweight Champion! The REAL World Heavyweight Champion, the real main-event! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" MADDIX That's right. I'm no reject, I'm a winner. And I realise why you're all so unhappy to see me right now. It's because you were wrong. You were all wrong! (points to the left) You were wrong. (points to the right) You were wrong. (points to the left again) You were wrong. (points to the camera) YOU were wrong. Everybody who expected me to lose this OAOAST World Heavyweight Title at AngleSlam? Wrong! The AngleSlam Curse continued. The PRL Can't Get The Job Done Curse continued. And the reign of La Cucaracha, it continues on unabated! Megan applauds her man. Like he needs the ego boost. MADDIX See, the odds were staked against me at AngleSlam. Plenty of times, this title could have been ripped from my waist without me even getting pinned for it and let's face it, that was the only way this belt was possibly leaving my possession. The deck was stacked. The mountain, steep. But if you thought I was going to buckle under the pressure then you clearly aren't familiar with just who I am. That which does not kill me can only make me stronger. Harder, Better, Faster, Landon. COLE That sounded kinda familiar. COACH Shhhh! MADDIX Just like you were all wrong about Todd Cortez, you underestimated me again and now, you're all chowing down on that humble pie. I just hope you've all learnt your lesson finally. I. Am. Your. World. Champion. I am the BEST! I'm no longer some outsider from the SWF, I am your standard bearer. And there's nobody that can mat... The lights go down in the arena. A Puerto Rican flag appears on the AngleTron. In big white blocky letters, the following words appear on the screen, with Tha Puerto Rican saying them: [b]*THE CHAMP IS HERE!*[/b] With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and "Know Your Role '99" begins playing, with the crowd standing up and booing. PR is heard saying, "THE CHAMP IS HERE!" throughout the song, while smoke fills the entryway and strobe lights appear on the entrance set. A few seconds elapsed, and out from the curtains and through the smoke steps "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican. COLE What is this now? Landon watches on with hands on hips as PRL strides to the ring, already running his mouth at a mile a minute rate. In he slides, Landon hanging back against the ropes as Tha Puerto Rican angrily demands a microphone. MADDIX I have no idea why you're out here. What is it with people interru... PRL Landon Maddix, know your role... "AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH!!" PRL glares at the fans. PRL Maddix, you are without a shadow of a doubt the LUCKIEST man on the face of God's green earth! You have the nerve to come out here and run your mouth about how you beat Tha Puerto Rican? How you overcame tremendous odds? Landon Maddix, you got lucky, that's all! You were lucky that refereeing our match was none other than 79 year-old, arthritic, blind as a bitch-slapped bat Earl Hebner who managed to MISS the fact that I had the Corporate foot on the ropes when you, quote-un-quote, 'pinned me' at AngleSlam! And right now, I am DEMANDING a rematch! Laughing at the suggestion, Landon holds his hand up. MADDIX PR, seriously buddy... nobody's buying that. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" MADDIX I mean, come on, that's the oldest excuse in the book. You're just blowing smoke. PRL Monkeys in the truck, roll the footage! MADDIX Footage? What foota... [QUOTE]Maddix quickly knocks down Malibu and lifts PRL up, into the fireman's carry, turning him away from the ropes before delivering the GO 2 SLEE... *SMACK!* ...SCHOOL'S OUT!! COLE SCHOOL'S OUT! HE GOT HIM, RIGHT ON THE BUTT... ONE! COLE WAIT! TWO! COLE WAIT NO, ZACK! THREEEEEE!!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE NO! Zack, having realised what was happening a second too late in his exhaustion, dogpiles on top of the fall just as the three comes down. COLE Zack broke it up! Didn't he? COACH No! That was three, look at the referee. ---------------------------------------------- *SECOND CAMERA ANGLE* *SMACK!* ...SCHOOL'S OUT!! ONE! TWO! [I]...foot goes on the ropes...[/I] THREEEEEE!!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Zack, having realised what was happening a second too late in his exhaustion, dogpiles on top of the fall just as the three comes down.[/QUOTE] Back to live action and Landon stammers for a reply, the crowd louder now. MADDIX Now... now, hang on, that proves nothing. PRL That proves you didn't beat me. MADDIX Look, I know they say the camera never lies but, we all know that isn't neecessarily true. That was just a poor camera angle. That could have been doctored footage for all we know! PRL Landon, face it, you didn't deserve to beat me. You didn't really pin Tha Puerto Rican. And that means, you owe me a rematch, fair and square, one on one, to see who the better man reall... .:CUE: "Getting Away With Murder", Papa Roach:. "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COACH Oh, what now!? The Pittsburghers erupt as ZACK MALIBU walks out onto the stage, microphone in hand and a wry smile on his face. Arms folded, Zack looks at the two bickering superstars in the ring and shakes his head. MALIBU Forgetting someone? MADDIX This is getting ridicu... MALIBU Ridiculous!? No Landon, YOU'RE ridiculous! The fact you came out with the win at AngleSlam is ridiculous. The fact you're still holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship is ridiculous. This little weekly playground squabble you two keep having is ridiculous. Let's cut the bullshit and get down to facts, huh? Usually, I'm not one for cursing. But that's exactly what these fans are thinking. That's what they were chanting as you walked out of the Garden with that belt. They know, what went down was bull. They know you didn't deserve to retain that belt. PR, thanks for the little visual reminder you just gave us all. Makes my explanation pretty simple. I kicked Landon. Landon fell on top of you. Maddix, School's Out was lights out! How long did it even take you to realise you'd actually won the match? 5, 10 minutes? 15 even? You were OUT! Out COLD! I had you beat and if it wasn't for pure LUCK, I would be the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion right now!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" PRL makes a motion for Zack that he's all mouth, which is kinda ironic. MALIBU I'm not one to bitch, moan and gripe when things don't go my way. Unlike some. But if PRL's out here demanding a rematch, he needs to get in line because by all rights, I'm the man who deserves the rematch. See, I was screwed by Money In The Bank. I got screwed at AngleSlam. And it's getting tiresome now. MADDIX Listen... first of all, I beat PRL with a Samoan Drop, okay? That fancy little kung-fu you threw at me? Barely grazed me. Second of all, you've used up your title shots boys. You... PRL My foot was on the rope! MADDIX You used that fancy little title shot contract already. And seeing as it was signed by some washed up actor from CHiPS, I'm surprised is was worth the paper it was printed in the first place. And as for you Malibu, I've just got one thing to say to you. This be... .:CUE: "Medal":. "YYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COACH Uh-oh. COLE Busy night for the boss! The Pittsburgh crowd comes completely UNGLUED as their own ANGLESAULT comes through the entrance doors. Zack gives him a casual nod and hands him his microphone, waiting for the noise to die down. MADDIX What the hell is this? Do you people back there playing the music just play whatever CD gets handed to you, no questions asked!? ANGLESAULT Landon, save it. Now, there's been a lot of things said out here. Zack, you did hit School's Out to set up the pinfall. That's not really an issue though. In the heat of matches, things happen. PR, that footage has been viewed a number of times by myself, trust me. I realise that you did get your foot on the ropes. But this isn't the NFL, there is no instant replay. The referee's decision is final. And yes, you are still the World Champion Landon. MADDIX I know. ANGLESAULT But, the [i]Undisputed[/i] Champion? Perhaps not. See, there is a dispute here. Having reviewed the footage, PRL did have a foot on the ropes... and, technically, Zack was on top of the pinfall when the three count was made. Looking more and more confused by the second, Landon says something to Megan, who just shrugs. ANGLESAULT So, here's the thing. Does PRL deserve a rematch? Does Zack deserve a rematch? We're four weeks away from Zero Hour and it seems like we've got more questions than answers. Well, me and the other 'wisemen' have the answers. Yes, you will get a rematch. Both Zack and PRL smile for a second, then glare at each other. ANGLESAULT Both of you. "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!" Landon rolls his eyes, kicking thin air and ranting to Megan again. ANGLESAULT At Zero Hour, it will be Landon Maddix versus Tha Puerto Rican versus Zack Malibu for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship once again. But, that doesn't neccessarily solve things. Let's see, we've got complaints about possible title changes without our champion being involved, fluke victories, bad refereeing decisions. So, just so we've not right back in the same position this time next month with more complaints, we're going to settle it a little more fairly. Even odds. No flukes. Three-way LADDER MATCH!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" MADDIX :O "Medal" hits again and AngleSault, his job done, shakes hands with Zack before leaving as quickly as he arrived. Zack smiles to himself as he follows after him, while PRL nods confidently over at Landon. The World Champion still looks stunned, clutching his title a little tighter all of a sudden. COLE Can you believe that!? A three-way Ladder Match!? COACH And that ain't dirtsheet talk, that's from the head honcho! It's going down at Zero Hour baby! COLE Twenty four days away, Zero Hour, what a main-event to look forward to! As PRL leaves, Landon is left to be consoled by Megan. 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