HD: Main Event Match

[Ed Wood Caulfield 0]

Main Event, please!

 

"LIGHTNING CREW!"

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

The lights go down in the arena as the opening to "No Chance In Hell" begins playing. Smoke fills the entrance stage. The crescendo hits, and a huge burst of pyro hits the stage. "No Chance In Hell" by Bradley Royds begins playing over the P.A. system.  

*[i]No chance (No chance)
That's what ya got! (Ha! Ha! Yeah.)

We're up against
no machine too strong (Too strong)

Pussy politicians buying souls for us
are...PUPPETS! (Puppets!)[/i]*

The entrance doors slide open, and Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua come out through the smoke. The crowd boos louder than before. Wall and Boricua look at the crowd with serious expressions on their faces. Boricua sneers at the crowd. He yells at some fans. Wall tells Boricua to calm down a bit. Once Boricua calms down, Cuban Wall pumps his right fist into the air. The crowd boos again. Wall and Boricua look at each other, and then begin their walk to the ring. Cuban Wall's eyes are focused solely on the squared circle, while Mr. Boricua grunts and screams at the fans. 

*DING DING DING*

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, the following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall with TV time remaining. Introducing first, coming to the ring at this time. Representing The Lightning Crew. At a total combined weight of 585 lbs. They are the team of CUBAN WALL and MISTERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR BORICUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! 

Cuban Wall shadow boxes a bit as he continues walking to the ring. Mr. Boricua grunts and snorts. 

COLE
Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua have teamed up several times in the past, so they already hold an advantage over their opponents! 

COACH
Not just that, Cole. They're also really big, really talented, and members of The Lightning Crew! 

COLE
That's true, Coach. This will NOT be an easy battle for either Tha Puerto Rican OR The Mad Cappa! 

COACH
Damn right. Which is why I am SO looking forward to this match! This is going to be great! 

Mr. Boricua yells at the fans at ringside. Several little children run behind their mothers and fathers. Cuban Wall climbs the ring steps with Mr. Boricua following him. Wall enters the ring via the top ring rope, and Mr. Boricua follows him. Cuban Wall shadow boxes in the ring while a spotlight shines on him and Mr. Boricua. Wall and Boricua stand near the ring ropes, look at each other...and do The Lightning Crew Salute together in sync! The crowd boos. Cuban Wall jaws with the fans as "No Chance In Hell" continues playing. Boricua poses on a second turnbuckle and yells at the fans. 

COLE
Tha Puerto Rican and The Mad Cappa team up for the first time in a long time! And it's coming up next! 

[b]Commercials[/b]

We return to HeldDOWN~! with Cuban Wall posing on a second turnbuckle to boos. Wall gets off the second turnbuckle and heads to another second turnbuckle where he raises his hands in the air again. Wall gets off the turnbuckle and heads to a third second turnbuckle where he raises his hands in the air once more. Cuban Wall gets off the second turnbuckle and heads to the fourth second turnbuckle to raise his hands in the air again. Wall gets off the turnbuckles and shadow boxes in the ring while Mr. Boricua heads to the outside to yell at the fans. 

COLE
Back on HeldDOWN~!, and fans, we are moments away from a big main event! Tha Puerto Rican and The Mad Cappa TEAMING UP! And yet, in two weeks on the New Year's Spectacular, they are going to be in a Triple Threat Match with Stephen Joseph Popick for the OAOAST World Title! 

COACH
They're not going to be able to team up, Cole! There is too much history, too much HATRED, for them to coexist! Plus, they know what's coming up on January 3rd, and that will distract them too! 

COLE
It is very likely that this won't be an easy alliance! There is no love lost between PRL and The Mad Cappa. But this is only one match. And they have a common enemy in Wall and Boricua. If they can remember that, they might have a chance! 

COACH
They won't, which is why they're doomed. 

The lights go back on in the arena. "No Chance In Hell" by Bradley Royds dies down. 

COLE
What an announcement from Stephen Joseph earlier tonight. Both PR and Cappa getting a shot at the World Heavyweight Title on January 3rd on the New Year's Spectacular in a Triple Threat Match. Cappa's first Title shot ever. PRL looking to win his first World Championship ever in two weeks. 

COACH
We've said that so many times over the past year that the words have lost all meaning! 

COLE
While it's true that Tha Puerto Rican has failed to win the World Heavyweight Title yet, he is resilient. He will not give up. He won't rest until he has the World Heavyweight Title belt in his possession! 

COACH
Then he will keep trying until the day he dies, because that moment will NEVER happen! 

COLE
That moment might happen two weeks from now on the New Year's Spectacular! PRL could begin 2008 by winning his first World Heavyweight Championship! But so could The Mad Cappa, who also doesn't have a World Title reign in his resume. A Triple Threat Match makes things rather interesting, alot of questions will be answered on January 3rd, the first OAOAST event of the year 2008, we hope you will join us on that date! 

Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall remove their sunglasses and hand them to a ringside attendant. Cuban Wall removes the gold chain from around his neck and hands that over to the ringside attendant too. The crowd boos loudly. Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua look to the entrance. 

COLE
Our main event is about to start right now! 

COACH
Oh goodie! 

The lights go down in the arena. A Puerto Rican flag appears on the AngleTron. In big white blocky letters, the following words appear on the screen, with Tha Puerto Rican saying them: 

*THE CHAMP IS HERE!*

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and "Know Your Role '99" begins playing, with the crowd standing up and cheering loudly. PR is heard saying, "THE CHAMP IS HERE!" throughout the song, while smoke fills the entrance stage and strobe lights appear over, under and around the AngleTron. A few seconds elapsed, the entrance doors slide open, and out through the smoke appears Tha Puerto Rican to a loud pop from the thousands in attendance. 

COLE
And here comes ONE of the #1 Contenders for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title! 

PRL looks at the crowd. He does The People's Eyebrow. P.R. chuckles, and then looks at Wall and Boricua, who are motioning PRL to enter the ring. PRL talks back, snorts, and then begins his walk down the entrance ramp as "Know Your Role '99" continues playing. 

BUFFER
And their opponents. First, coming to the ring at this time. From San Juan, Puerto Rico. Weighing in at 220 lbs. He is one-half of The Badd Boyz. THA PUERTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO RICCCCCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!

PRL continues his walk to the ring, staring at Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua the entire time. 

COLE
The People's Champion has another opportunity to become the World Heavyweight Champion in two weeks on the New Year's Spectacular! But in order to do that, he must overcome both his former manager turned rival AND his greatest opponent, who tonight is actually his PARTNER if you can believe that!

COACH
Tha Puerto Rican HATES The Mad Cappa with every fiber of his being. How can he look The Mad Cappa in the eye, much less tag him, without wanting to rip his head off? 

COLE
He's going to have to keep all of his hatred inside. For one night only, PRL must set aside personal differences in order to win this match! He MUST coexist with The Mad Cappa, because it will be next to impossible to combat the two biggest members of The Lightning Crew by himself! There's no other way around it!  

COACH
I think PRL has less of a chance coexisting with The Mad Cappa then he does of beating Popick on January 3rd! 

COLE
Well, anything can happen in the OAOAST! 

COACH
Except a PRL World Title reign, apparently! 

COLE
Oh, will you stop!?

Tha Puerto Rican stops near the ring. Cuban Wall stares a hole through PRL. PR mouths off to Wall and Boricua. 

COACH
Well, PRL is obviously not afraid to run his mouth at Wall and Boricua. 

COLE
He never has been. He is not intimidated by either man. Remember, he led these men for FOUR YEARS. 

COACH
And they hated every second of it! Which is why they are looking forward to this match! 

COLE
Well, I don't know about that. 

COACH
It's true. They told me themselves. Well, Cuban Wall told me. Mr. Boricua just grunted and yelled alot. 

"Know Your Role '99" dies down. The crowd is buzzing in anticipation for The Mad Cappa's entrance. PRL is still on the outside staring at Wall and Boricua. Mr. Boricua grunts and cracks his knuckles. 

COLE
The Mad Cappa and Tha Puerto Rican: longtime enemies, but tonight, partners! Can these two coexist after all they've been through over the years?

[i]*1, 2, 3! Hit it!*[/i]

The opening trumpet blare causes the crowd to stand up and cheer for the first time in over three years. Then, "Let Me Clear My Throat (Old School Reunion Mix)" by DJ Kool starts playing for the first time on OAOAST TV since 2004. Red spotlights circle the arena while strobe lights appear over, under and around the AngleTron. A single spotlight shines on the entrance. The Mad Cappa's back is turned to the camera. Cappa starts DANCING~! bringing the crowd to life. TMC turns around and flashes a smile, delighting the audience who were so used to him being grumpy for the past three years. Cappa begins walking down the entrance ramp, slapping hands with the fans along the way. 

BUFFER
And his partner. Coming to the ring at this time. From Northern Virginia. Weighing in at 183 lbs. He is a former two-time One And Only AngleSault Thread Puerto Rican/Italian Champion. He...is...THE MADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD CAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! 

The Mad Cappa continues slapping hands with the fans on the way to the ring. 

COLE
The Mad Cappa has had some of the greatest matches of his career against the man who is his tag team partner tonight! He won his first Title in the OAOAST, the Puerto Rican Championship, against PRL at AngleMania III on March 28, 2004 in front of 78,000-plus fans in the Pontiac Silverdome in what some say is one of the greatest matches in AngleMania and OAOAST history! He has battled it out with Tha Puerto Rican all over the world twice over and now tonight, for the first time since 2003, he must team up with the man who has made his life a living hell on more than one occasion! 

COACH
You rarely team up with the guy who crushed your larynx. 

COLE
Cappa's got his old theme music back. He's dancing again. He's changed from just last week. 

COACH
Last week he was a member of the greatest stable in wrestling. This week he's nothing and he'll stay that way! 

COLE
Not unless he wins the World Heavyweight Title on the New Year's Spectacular! 

COACH
Which has an even lesser chance of happening than PRL winning it! Cappa's never been this close to the World Title in his entire life! He's never even had a shot at the belt! Whereas PRL knows what it's like, Cappa doesn't. Both PRL and Cappa will choke under the pressure in two weeks in the Triple Threat Match, PRL because he doesn't want to fail AGAIN, and Cappa because he doesn't know how to handle the pressure of wrestling in a main event World Heavyweight Title Match, and like Popick says, he's going to divide and conquer and have another successful Title defense! 

COLE
Popick's plan is to pit PR and Cappa together so that he can weasel his way to another successful Title defense. 

COACH
Oh come on! 

COLE
Popick knows their history, as we all do, but tonight, can these two men put their past aside and team up against two giant foes in Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua? 

COACH
They can't and they won't. 

The Mad Cappa also stops near the ring. Cappa's smile fades when he looks at Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua. Wall has an evil grin on his face, inviting Mad Cappa into the ring. Mr. Boricua sneers, snorts, grunts, yells, and cracks his knuckles, lunging after Mad Cappa. Cappa points a menacing finger at his opponents, and then turns his head to Tha Puerto Rican. Tha Puerto Rican turns his attention to The Mad Cappa at the same time. PRL and Cappa look at each other, and sneer. 

COLE
Uh-oh. They don't seem to be getting along too much right about now! I think they've finally realize that they got to team up and they don't like it one bit!

COACH
They're not going to last five minutes without taking a shot at each other!

Cappa and PRL start conversing outside the ring while "Let Me Clear My Throat (Old School Reunion Mix)" continues playing. Their conversation gets heated. 

COLE
Are they discussing who starts first? 

COACH
They're probably discussing who walks out of the match first! 

PRL and Cappa both point to Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall. After some further discussion, Cappa and PRL just decide to slide into the ring at the same time and attack Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall! That's enough for referee Earl Hebner to call for the bell! 

*DING DING DING*

[b]THA PUERTO RICAN AND THE MAD CAPPA vs. CUBAN WALL AND MR. BORICUA[/b]
"Let Me Clear My Throat (Old School Reunion Mix)" by DJ Kool dies down. Tha Puerto Rican pairs up with Cuban Wall, while The Mad Cappa pairs up with Mr. Boricua. A slugfest erupts with both pairs while the crowd goes nuts. 

COLE
Tha Puerto Rican and The Mad Cappa, partners tonight, opponents January 3rd! 

COACH
And enemies for life! 

Mr. Boricua gains the advantage over Mad Cappa, while Cuban Wall quickly gains the advantage over Tha Puerto Rican. Wall pounds on PRL and then whips him into a neutral turnbuckle corner. Cuban Wall readies himself, and then charges forward...PRL moves out of the way...Wall misses his Avalanche! Puerto waits for Wall to get near him, and then starts hammering away with Rock-style punches to the temple! Meanwhile, Mad Cappa nails Mr. Boricua with right jabs, dazing the biggest wrestler in The Lightning Crew! 

COLE
PR and The Mad Cappa are fighting back! 

COACH
Come on Wall! Come on Boricua! 

The Mad Cappa gets Mr. Boricua good and dazed, before charging forward, clotheslining Mr. Boricua over the top rope and onto the floor! Meanwhile, Tha Puerto Rican elbows Cuban Wall in the face! P.R. grabs Wall and then tells Mad Cappa something. Cappa and PRL take Cuban Wall into the ropes and hammer on him for a bit, before giving him a double Irish Whip into the opposite ropes, and following with a DOUBLE BACK ELBOW! 

COLE
A double team move from The Mad Cappa and Tha Puerto Rican! I never thought I'd see the day!

COACH
It's not going to last. 

PRL and Cappa realize that they've just teamed up...and just shrug their shoulders. Tha Puerto Rican exits the ring while The Mad Cappa picks Cuban Wall up and beats him in the face. 

COLE
The Mad Cappa and Tha Puerto Rican aren't friends, but they have a common enemy in The Lightning Crew which is why they're focusing on Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua right now rather than each other!

Cappa gives Wall an Irish whip into the ropes. Standing dropkick! Cover. 

ONE! 

KICK OUT!!!

COACH
Not even two! Cappa, you are so pathetic! 

COLE
Says the guy who was rooting him on against Tha Puerto Rican last week.

TMC picks CW up. Wall shoves Cappa away. But Cappa fights back with punches to the face! The Mad One whips Cuban Wall into the ropes again. He goes for a clothesline, Cuban Wall ducks, bounces off the ropes...and fires with a flying clothesline taking The Mad Cappa down! The crowd boos, but not because of Wall's clothesline, but because the one and only Stephen Joseph Popick is making his way down to the ring! 

COLE
Oh no. What's HE doing out here!?

COACH
Considering two of the men in this match will face him on January 3rd, I'd say he's scouting the competition! 

COLE
Coach, you and I both know there's more to it than that! 

COACH
How so? 

Stephen Joseph Popick, the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt over his right shoulder, stares at Cappa and Cuban Wall in the ring. He stops near the ring and just watches the match, eyes focused solely on it. 

COACH
See? He's just watching! He's scouting his competition! 

COLE
Cappa and PRL better be careful. Popick's presence could be a distraction for the two of them! 

COACH
If it is, then that's an added bonus! 

Back in the ring, Cuban Wall covers The Mad Cappa. 1...2...KICK OUT!!! Wall looks at Popick and nods his head. Popick just stands there. 

COLE
Nice to know that the members of The Lightning Crew went from following Tha Puerto Rican to following Stephen Joseph Popick with no problems whatsoever! 

COACH
You heard Popick. This was a plan three months in the making! And it all came together beautifully...until that thug Colombian Heat ruined everything! But don't worry, he'll get his comeuppance soon enough! 

Cuban Wall picks Cappa up. Wall grabs Cappa's right arm and twists it into an arm-wringer. Wall kicks Cappa in the gut. He then does it again. And again. Cuban Wall punches Cappa's right arm! He then punches it again, Cappa screaming in pain. Wall then drives the point of his right elbow directly into Cappa's right arm! Wall does that again. CW pulls Cappa in for a bodyslam! 

COLE
A bodyslam from that man must feel a thousand times worst due to his sheer size! 

COACH
Damn straight. 

Wall drops an elbow onto Mad Cappa's chest! He goes for the cover. 

1...










2...








KICK OUT!!! 

COLE
A quick kickout by The Mad One! 

Wall glances over at Earl Hebner, then at Popick. Popick stands there stoic. CW picks up The Mad Cappa and takes him over to a neutral corner. Wall slams Cappa's head on the top turnbuckle pad, and then chokes Cappa with his bare hands! 

EARL HEBNER
COME ON BREAK IT UP! ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIV--

Cuban Wall lets go...and then punches Cappa in the jaw! 

COLE
What a cheapshot!

COACH
How so? Punches are legal in professional wrestling. 

COLE
It's the principle of the thing! 

COACH
Wuss. 

Cuban Wall pleads his innocence to the referee for that punch. When he turns his attention back to Cappa, Cappa is ready with a right hand! And another! And another! And another! Cappa grabs Cuban Wall and nails him with several forearms to the face! He finishes by spinning around and nailing Wall with The IMPACT! 

COLE
The IMPACT! The Mad Cappa with that discuss forearm shot to the face! And Cuban Wall is nearly out of it! 

Mad Cappa exits the ring and grabs Cuban Wall by his legs, dropping him to the canvas! Cappa then drags Cuban Wall until Wall's legs are wrapped around the ring post! Cappa grabs Wall's right leg, looks at the crowd, smiles, and then slams Cuban Wall's right leg against the ring post! 

COACH
Disqualify him! Disqualify him! 

COLE
The Mad Cappa is in control of the 6'7" Muscle of The Lightning Crew! 

Cappa plays to the crowd, and then slides back into the ring. TMC pulls Cuban Wall out from the ring post and then picks him up. Cappa arm-drags Cuban Wall back down onto the mat! The Mad Cappa heads over to his corner, stares at PRL...and then tags him into the match to cheers! 

COLE
The Mad Cappa made the tag to Tha Puerto Rican! He actually slapped the man's hand! 

COACH
That's the ONLY reason he'd EVER slap PRL's hand though! 

COLE
No argument here. 

Tha Puerto Rican waits for Cuban Wall to get up. When he does, PR fires off with Rock-style punches to the temple! Punch. Punch. Punch. NOW KISS THAT LEFT! Punch! Cuban Wall doesn't fall, so PRL grabs Wall by his right wrist and gives him an Irish whip into the ropes. PRL follows that up with a dropkick that nearly takes Wall down. PRL then bounces off the ropes, charges forward and gets off the mat with a Gamengiri which finally takes the big man down! 

COLE
[b]Dodge THIS, BITCH~![/b]

PRL quickly gets back to his feet. Noticing that Cuban Wall is lying dead center in the ring, Tha Puerto Rican decides that there's no better time than now to kick Cuban Wall's right arm onto his chest. 

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

COACH
Already!?

COLE
Tha Puerto Rican might be feeling it right about now! 

Tha Puerto Rican removes his right elbow pad and throws it into the crowd. He then does some weird hand signals, and then charges forward, bounces off the ropes, leaps over Cuban Wall, bounces off the opposite ropes. 

COLE
It is now time for the most electrifying move in professional wrestling, The Puerto Rico Elbow! 

PRL rushes forward--Cuban Wall starts to get up! PR stops himself from doing The Puerto Rico Elbow! 

THA PUERTO RICAN
OH NO YOU DON'T! 

Tha Puerto Rican kicks Cuban Wall back down onto the mat! THEN, he drops The Puerto Rico Elbow to a pop! 

COLE
Almost had a scare there for a second. Thought we weren't going to see a Puerto Rico Elbow! 

COACH
How sad would that be if we didn't get to see it. Notice the sarcasm there?

PRL covers Cuban Wall, hooking Wall's right leg. 

1...












2...












3--MR. BORICUA BREAKS IT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

COLE
Mr. Boricua stopping a possible pinfall there! 

COACH
Good job, Boricua! 

Earl Hebner orders Mr. Boricua back to his corner. Mr. Boricua yells at the diminutive referee, not bothering to follow the rules. As Boricua continues screaming at the ref, PRL picks Cuban Wall up. He hooks him up for a LATIN SLAM--but again, Mr. Boricua attacks PRL, preventing it from happening! PRL stumbles, but then regains his balance and attacks Mr. Boricua! However, Earl Hebner prevents any further attacking by separating PR and Boricua. 

COACH
Good! Gotta keep 'em separated! 

Tha Puerto Rican turns around...


RIGHT INTO A GOOZLE~! 

COLE
Oh no. 

COACH
Oh yes. 

Cuban Wall grabs Tha Puerto Rican's red tights and then lifts him up as the crowd boos. 

CHOKESLAM!!!!

COLE
Chokeslam! Chokeslam on Tha Puerto Rican! 

COACH
Oh! He sent him right to the canvas with that one! STRAIGHT TO THE CANVAS! He got him good! He got him good! 

The crowd boos loudly. Cuban Wall sneers at PRL, chuckles, and then makes the tag to Mr. Boricua. The crowd boos some more. 

COLE
And now Mr. Boricua in this match for the first time, officially.

"PO-PICK SUCKS!"
"PO-PICK SUCKS!"
"PO-PICK SUCKS!"
"PO-PICK SUCKS!"

Popick isn't fazed by the chants against him, still focused on the match in the ring. He still has a serious expression on his face as Mr. Boricua picks Tha Puerto Rican up. Short-arm clothesline from Mr. Boricua! 

COLE
That's power! That's power right there! And--wait a minute--wait a minute--hold on...

Vitamin X and The Bone Thug are walking down the entrance ramp to LOUD boos! 

COLE
What are they doing out here? They're not involved in the Triple Threat Match on January 3rd! 

COACH
They want something better than ringside seats, Michael! Besides, Vitamin X is a Prince. He deserves only the best seating in the house. 

COLE
I thought that prince crap ended when PRL got kicked out of The Lightning Crew! 

COACH
I'm going to have to check with Popick on that, but I'm pretty sure Popick and Lindsay are the King and Queen of The Lightning Crew and Vitamin X and Princess Stacey are the Prince and Princess of The Lightning Crew. 

COLE
Oh come on! 

Vitamin X and The Bone Thug bypass Popick and stop at ringside. They too watch the match, Bone Thug wearing the Puerto Rican flag bandanas on his head and over his mouth in addition to sunglasses over his eyes. Meanwhile, Mr. Boricua slams Tha Puerto Rican's head on a top turnbuckle pad! Boricua yells while punching PRL in the face in the neutral corner! Boricua applies a headlock on The People's Champ and then takes him over to The Lightning Crew corner, making the tag to Cuban Wall. Boricua holds PRL so that Wall can kick Puerto Rican in the stomach. Wall punches PRL in the face! He does it several times, further weakening the already weakened Puerto Rican Superstar. Wall scoops Tha Puerto Rican up and hits him with a Death Valley Driver! 

COLE
Death Valley Driver from Wall! 

CW gets up and stomps on PRL. He then falls to his knees and chokes PRL with his bare hands. 

COLE
We have taken our last commercial break. We will stay with this match until the very end! And the end may be near as Cuban Wall chokes Tha Puerto Rican with his bare hands. Ref, stop this! 

COACH
Let them fight! This is fun! 

CW stops choking Puerto Rican at the count of 4. The Mad Cappa can only watch as Cuban Wall picks Tha Puerto Rican up. Stephen Joseph Popick, Vitamin X and The Bone Thug look on as Cuban Wall whips Tha Puerto Rican into a neutral corner. Wall then walks back into the opposite corner, and charges forward, full steam ahead, taking the wind out of Tha Puerto Rican with an Avalanche! The crowd groans as soon as the Avalanche connects! 

COLE
Oh my! An Avalanche! A move that could have severely damaged Tha Puerto Rican's insides! 

COACH
His insides have turned to mush now! 

CW chokes PR with his bare hands again! Cappa offers PR half-assed words of encouragement. Mr. Boricua grunts, yells, and snorts. Vitamin X smiles evilly while The Bone Thug nods his head in approval. Popick just looks on stoic. Cuban Wall stops choking Tha Puerto Rican at the count of 4. 

CUBAN WALL
You're done for, Puerto! 

CW drives a knee into Tha Puerto Rican's stomach! He drives another knee! And a third! Cuban Wall then switches to soupbones all over Tha Puerto Rican's body! 

COLE
Those rights and lefts damaging Tha Puerto Rican! 

COACH
He's going to feel really sore in the morning! 

Wall stops punching PRL so that he can elbow him in the face! He does it several times, and PRL is soon groggy. Wall with a right hand, following it up by grabbing P.R.'s right hand and twisting it into an arm-wringer so that he can take PRL over to his corner and make the tag to Mr. Boricua. Mr. Boricua snorts and then hits PRL's right arm with a double axehandle! Mr. B punches Tha Puerto Rican in the face! He does it a few more times and then scoops Tha Puerto Rican up. Bodyslam HARD onto the mat! Boricua then gives PRL a Splash! 

1...









2...











THE MAD CAPPA PULLS MR. BORICUA OFF OF THA PUERTO RICAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

COLE
The Mad Cappa HELPING Tha Puerto Rican right there! I can't believe it! 

COACH
Oh Cappa, look how far you've fallen.

Cuban Wall protests Cappa's interference. Earl Hebner orders The Mad Cappa to go back to his corner. Cappa gladly obliges. Wall taunts Cappa as he walks back to his corner. 

COACH
That's right! You go back to your corner! Cheater. 

Mr. Boricua yells at the crowd. He screams, and then picks Tha Puerto Rican up. PRL kicks Boricua in the gut. PR punches Boricua in the face several times! But then Mr. Boricua chops PRL in the throat! 

COLE
Now come on! That was a cheapshot! 

COACH
No it wasn't. 

Boricua gives PRL an arm-drag! He then stomps on PR. Mr. B picks The P.R. Menace up and whips him into the ropes. Mr. Boricua goes for a clothesline, Tha Puerto Rican ducks, kicks Mr. Boricua in the gut, and gives him a double-armed DDT! 

COLE
Double-armed DDT from The People's Champ! 

Vitamin X panics on the outside. Popick remains stoic. P.R. picks Boricua up and gives him an Irish whip into the ropes--Mr. Boricua reverses--Mr. Boricua hits PR with a HARD clothesline! 

COLE
And just like that, Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall are back in control! 

Boricua screams at the crowd. He picks PRL up. He places Puerto in a facelock, puts PR's left arm over his head, grabs his tights, and lifts him up, holding him in the air so that he can drop him stomach-first onto the top ring rope! Boricua then climbs the top rope and positions himself...then jumps off the top rope, hitting PRL in the back of the head with a kneedrop!

COLE
Such agility from the 6'9" 300 pound Mr. Boricua! 

COACH
Not too many big men can do what he does! 

COLE
No sir. 

PRL has crumbled onto the mat, so Mr. Boricua goes for the cover. 

ONE! 



TWO! 






THREE--KICK OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mr. Boricua yells. He yells some more. Cuban Wall tells Mr. Boricua to do something. Mr. Boricua picks Tha Puerto Rican up and takes him over to The Lightning Crew corner. He makes the tag to Cuban Wall, and then holds PRL up so that Cuban Wall can kick PR in the stomach! Mr. Boricua kicks PRL in the stomach! Wall punches Tha Puerto Rican in the face several times. He then runs over and punches The Mad Cappa! Cappa quickly recovers and enters the ring, but is held back by Earl Hebner! While Cappa is being held back, Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua double team on Tha Puerto Rican, punching him in the face repeatedly while Vitamin X cheers! 

COLE
Now come on! That isn't right! Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua double teaming Tha Puerto Rican while Earl Hebner is with The Mad Cappa! 

COACH
Hey, if the referee didn't see it, it never happened. 

COLE
Oh give me a break! This ain't right! 

The crowd boos loudly as Tha Puerto Rican crumbles down onto the mat! Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua choke PRL with their boots! PRL gasps for air on the mat! 

COLE
PRL being choked by two men he used to lead! Now, they're being led by that man, the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion after the shocking events of three weeks ago! 

COACH
And look at Popick. Just watching. Scouting his competition. And his competition ain't doing so well now!

COLE
PRL is in a bad way here. He AND Cappa have a World Title match in two weeks. 

COACH
And if Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall keep this up, they won't make it to New Year's Spectacular! HA! HA!

The Mad Cappa returns to his corner, so Earl Hebner sees Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall choking Tha Puerto Rican with their feet and orders them to stop. Mr. Boricua goes back to The Lightning Crew corner, while Cuban Wall picks Tha Puerto Rican up and throws him over the top rope and onto the floor! 

COLE
PR hitting the floor with a sickening thud! 

Mr. Boricua jumps off the ring apron and grabs Tha Puerto Rican, so that he can lift him up and drop him face-first onto the barricade! Mr. Boricua yells. The Mad Cappa gets off the ring apron, but is too late. Cuban Wall exits the ring and heads on over to where Tha Puerto Rican is busy holding his jaw in pain. Wall grabs Puerto and gives him a headbutt! PRL stumbles, so Wall clotheslines the back of PRL's neck! 

COLE
Just like three weeks ago! Cuban Wall clotheslined the back of PRL's neck, which is what started the beatdown that led to PRL and Colombian Heat reuniting! That is how it all started! 

COACH
And now Cuban Wall is giving PRL flashbacks to that awful (great) event from three weeks ago!

COLE
Tha Puerto Rican is at the mercy of The Lightning Crew on the outside! 

Wall grabs P.R. and throws him back into the ring. Cuban Wall enters the ring, but then hears Vitamin X say, "BOO-YAH~!", so he walks over to Vitamin X and punches him in the jaw! 

VITAMIN X
OW! WHAT WAS THAT FOR!?

CUBAN WALL
Stop saying 'BOO-YAH~!'! 

Cuban Wall turns and goes back into the ring. Vitamin X sticks his tongue out at Wall when he's not looking. 

COLE
So Wall still punches Vitamin X in the jaw?

COACH
Yes, but it's out of love!

COLE
Right. Right.

CW walks on over and makes the tag to Mr. Boricua. Wall picks Tha Puerto Rican up and holds him so that Mr. Boricua can kick Puerto in the stomach! 

COLE
Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall in control for the majority of this contest. PRL and Mad Cappa having alot of difficulty handling the two big men, the two beasts of The Lightning Crew! 

COACH
And this surprises you because...?

Mr. Boricua gives PRL a snapmare takeover, and then applies a chinlock on him. 

COLE
Mr. Boricua beating on his former leader. The man who has been in The Lightning Crew for the longest. Mr. Boricua was at one point in time, Tha Puerto Rican's bodyguard. But not anymore! 

COACH
No. Now he's Popick's bodyguard! 

COLE
And somehow that's even worse. 

COACH
That's our World Champion you're talking about! How rude! 

Earl Hebner checks on Tha Puerto Rican. Mr. Boricua cinches the chinlock tight. He yells. 

"P.R.!"
"P.R.!"
"P.R.!"
"P.R.!"

COLE
This crowd trying to bring Tha Puerto Rican back to life! 

COACH
It's not going to work! 

Suddenly, PRL starts shaking his fists. The crowd gets hotter. PRL gets to his left knee. Mr. Boricua is shocked. Cuban Wall tells Boricua to keep the chinlock locked on. PRL slowly gets to his feet.

COLE
You were saying? 

COACH
There's no proof that it was the crowd's fault!

COLE
Yeah, but still...

COACH
No proof! I was right! 

COLE
Oy. 

Tha Puerto Rican gets to a vertical base, still trapped in the chinlock. The crowd gets hotter and hotter. PR elbows Boricua in the gut! He does it again! And again! And again! And again! PRL escapes the chinlock and starts punching Mr. Boricua in the face! The crowd comes to life! PRL keeps on hitting Mr. Boricua in the face, dazing and confusing the big man. Cuban Wall, Popick, Vitamin X and The Bone Thug can only watch as PRL whips Mr. Boricua into the ropes--NO--Mr. Boricua reverses the Irish whip! Mr. Boricua goes for a clothesline, Tha Puerto Rican ducks, stops in his tracks, jumps up, grabs Mr. Boricua from behind, and gives him an Edge-O-Matic!  

COLE
What a move from Tha Puerto Rican! 

The Edge-O-Matic took all of the energy out of Tha Puerto Rican! So much so, that he collapses onto the mat! Both Mr. Boricua and Tha Puerto Rican lie on the mat fatigued! The Mad Cappa and Cuban Wall watch as Earl Hebner starts his 10 count. 

"1!"

"2!"

COLE
Both Cappa and Cuban Wall want the tag! 

COACH
Get up, Boricua! Get up! 

"3!"

"4!"

PRL starts moving. 

"5!"

Mr. Boricua starts moving. 

"6!"

COLE
Both men making a move now! 

"7!"

Mr. Boricua crawls to his corner. 

"8!"

Tha Puerto Rican crawls to his corner. 

"9!"

Mr. Boricua makes the tag to Cuban Wall. 

Just as Tha Puerto Rican makes the tag to The Mad Cappa!

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

COLE
And The Mad Cappa is finally back in this match! 

Cuban Wall goes for a punch--BLOCKED! The Mad Cappa fires with lefts and rights on the 6'7" former OAOAST 24/7 Champion! Meanwhile, Vitamin X and The Bone Thug grab Tha Puerto Rican and force him to the outside where they start stomping on him! 

COLE
Hey! Wait a minute! Tha Puerto Rican has been taken outside! Vitamin X and The Bone Thug are doing a number on him! 

COACH
AGAIN! This is great! 

Vitamin X and The Bone Thug lay into Tha Puerto Rican! The crowd boos loudly! But they start cheering when Colombian Heat runs down the entrance ramp--NO! Spanish Fly attacks Heat and starts beating on him on the entrance ramp!

COLE
Damnit! For the third week in a row, Spanish Fly has attacked Colombian Heat! And now, they are beating on each other on the entrance ramp! 

COACH
Get him, Fly! Make The Lightning Crew proud! 

Spanish Fly stomps on Heat! He picks him up...and gets punched in the face! Colombian Heat fires with punches all over Spanish Fly's face! Back in the ring, Cuban Wall gives The Mad Cappa a big boot, which causes Cappa to stumble backwards into the ring ropes, which he gets tangled up in! 

COLE
And oh no! Cappa is trapped! He is trapped in those ropes! 

COACH
Heh. Cappa's doomed! 

Cuban Wall laughs evilly. He taunts Cappa, while The Mad One struggles to escape! On the outside, Colombian Heat and Spanish Fly are brawling on the entrance ramp, while Vitamin X and The Bone Thug pummel Tha Puerto Rican! Stephen Joseph Popick remains stoic the entire time. 

COLE
Things are breaking down here! We've got wrestlers fighting all over the arena! The Lightning Crew, The Badd Boyz, The Mad Cappa! They're all fighting! 

COACH
And we still got a match! Look! Wall's got The Mad Cappa right where he wants him! 

Cuban Wall punches Cappa in the face several times. Wall then walks backwards into the opposite ropes. He yells, and then charges forward--


right into a kick by The Mad Cappa!

COACH
Oh no! 

Cappa kicks to break free...and does! The Mad Cappa charges forward with a flying clothesline knocking Cuban Wall down! Cappa goes for the cover. 

1...









2...









KICK OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

COLE
Close call there! 

COACH
Things are going wild here! 

As the fighting continues on the outside, on the inside, The Mad Cappa stomps on Cuban Wall. He picks Wall up and gives him a whip into the ropes--Cuban Wall reverses--Cappa bounces off the ropes. Lou Thesz Press! 

COLE
Lou Thesz Press from The Mad Cappa! 

Cappa pummels Cuban Wall with rights! Mr. Boricua enters the ring. Cappa gets off of Wall and headbutts Mr. Boricua in the gut! He does it again! And again! Cuban Wall gets up and attacks The Mad Cappa from behind! Wall and Boricua double team on The Mad Cappa in the ring, while outside of the ring, Vitamin X and The Bone Thug continue assaulting Tha Puerto Rican! 

COLE
Things are breaking down here in Fresno! 

Earl Hebner tries to stop the brawling inside of the ring, but can't, so he calls for the bell. 

*DING DING DING* (10:04)

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

COLE
That's it! The match is over!

COACH
Aw! Weak! 

Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua double team The Mad Cappa, while Vitamin X and The Bone Thug double team Tha Puerto Rican. Colombian Heat and Spanish Fly fight up the entrance ramp, and soon disappear through the sliding doors. 

COLE
It's a madhouse out here! A MADHOUSE! 

COACH
There's fighting everywhere! I love it! 

The Mad Cappa fights back, going back and forth punching Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall! 

COLE
Cappa's fighting back! Cappa's fighting back! 

COACH
What!? No! No! No! No! No! 

Cappa gets Mr. Boricua and Cuban Wall dazed and confused. Meanwhile, Vitamin X picks Tha Puerto Rican up. Suddenly, PRL springs to life hitting Vitamin X with a punch! PRL hits The Bone Thug with a punch! He hits Vitamin X with a punch! He hits The Bone Thug with a punch! 

COLE
And now Tha Puerto Rican has come back to life! 

COACH
NOOOOOOOOOO!

Tha Puerto Rican goes back and forth! Bone Thug! VX! Bone Thug! VX! Bone Thug! VX! Bone Thug! VX! Tha Puerto Rican hits Vitamin X and The Bone Thug with Rock-style punches to the temple! Once both X and Bone Thug are stunned, PRL grabs them...and BUTTS THEIR HEADS TOGETHER!

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

COLE
PRL knocks The Bone Thug and Vitamin X out with that move! 

COACH
Not a bloody double noggin knocker!

Vitamin X and The Bone Thug lay unconscious on the protective mats. PRL taunts them, and then enters the ring, where he joins The Mad Cappa in beating up Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua! 

COLE
I don't believe this! Cappa and PRL are teaming up AGAIN! 

COACH
What's wrong with you guys! FIGHT BACK! FIGHT BACK! FIGHT BACK! FIGHT BACK! FIGHT BACK! FIGHT BACK! FIGHT BACK! FIGHT BACK! FIGHT BACK!

PR hammers on Mr. Boricua, while The Mad Cappa takes care of Cuban Wall! Stephen Joseph Popick looks on worried as he watches PR and Cappa take it to the two big men of The Lightning Crew! Vitamin X and The Bone Thug are still knocked out on the outside! 

COLE
Fans, we are out of time! Thank you for joining us here on HeldDOWN~! We'll see you next week with another live edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~! The final OAOAST HeldDOWN~! of 2007! For Jonathan "Da Coach" Coachman, I'm Michael Cole saying so long and have a Merry Christmas! A Happy Chanukah! And a Happy Kwanza! Good night everybody!

The Mad Cappa takes Cuban Wall to a turnbuckle corner and beats on him, getting Cuban Wall severely weakened. Tha Puerto Rican whips Mr. Boricua into the opposite turnbuckle corner. Tha Puerto Rican charges forward, and gives Mr. Boricua a Stinger Splash! The crowd cheers loudly. Stephen Joseph Popick freaks out on the outside, while Vitamin X and The Bone Thug are still knocked out on the outside. This is the last thing we see before we fade to black.

[b]FADE OUT[/b]

Edited December 21, 2007 by Ed Wood Caulfield