King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted February 6, 2008 BUFFER The following contest is a Conference Semi Final Match in the 2008 Anderson Cup, Miracle Weirdness Connection Conference, scheduled for one fall! Relieved to have gotten through that mouthful without stumbling over his words, Buffer smiles wide as "Easy Lover" begins to waft through the arena. [i]"Easy lover She'll get a hold on you believe it Like no other Before you know it you'll be on your knees"[/i] Out through the entrance swagger the walking stereotypes that are Rico de Janeiro and Lucius Soul. Lucius picks away at his 'fro with a renewed look of confidence on his face since we last saw him, Rico swaggering out in front stroking his trusty porn 'stache to all the Alabama mammas in the audience. The duo come to an abrupt stop as they're flashed in the aisleway by a fan hoping to earn some Mardi Gras beads. Unfortunately, the fan happens to be a heavily overweight male in his 40s which turns Rico a little green in the gills. VENTURA Don't go getting any ideas Schiavone! BUFFER Introducing team number one! At a total combined weight of four hundred and thirteen pounds... they are the number three seeds in the Miracle Weirdness Connection Conference... RICO DE JANEIRO and "SWEET" LUCIUS SOUL... together, they are THE MARDI GRAS HHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMEEWRECKING CCRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWii!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Lucius and Rico rule the roost, strutting around like they own the ring. Mainly because there's no big Oklahomans to argue with them, at the moment. SCHIAVONE The Mardi Gras crew looking pretty confident tonight Jess. VENTURA Well they've made it this far, they're now one win away from the Conference Final. And not to mention, they got that big win last weekend on Syndicated over The Bruisers... SCHIAVONE Well, that was in eight man tag team action and it was Synth who picked up the fall. VENTURA Doesn't matter. The record books say Mardi Gras were winners and The Sooners were losers. They've got momentum on their side, which is going to be vital because they'll need every advantage they can get if they hope to advance over the former OAOAST World Tag Team Champions. SCHIAVONE Who were never beaten for those titles, let's not forget. "Frankenstein" by Edgar Winter rips through the arena and the crowd jump to their feet. Muscles flexing to the point of bursting, Big Frank soaks in the spotlight with Uber barking away in the background. BUFFER And introducing their opponents! At a total combined weight of five hundred and thirty pounds. They hail from the great state of Oklahoma... the number two seeds in the Miracle Weirdness Connection Conference, BIG FRANK and UBER... THE SOOOOOOOOONNEEEEEEERRRRRRRR... BBRRRRRRUUUUUUUIIIIIISSEEEEERRRRRSSSSS!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" VENTURA The [i]great[/i] state of Oklahoma!? Is that what we did with JR in the end, locked him away writing Buffer's cue-cards? SCHIAVONE .....The Sooner Bruisers made these pre-recorded comments earlier. [COLOR=orange][i]OAOAST[/i][/COLOR] In the right corner of the screen appear The Sooners in front of a grey OAOAST backdrop. BIG FRANK You know since we've been back, me and Uber, we've been keepin' a pretty low profile. We've been away for a while, we ain't expecting to still be the top of the food chain around here. So we've been hard at work behind the scenes, knocking off the ring rust, getting back in top condition. We came back for competition. But we sure as hell weren't expecting to have an 'L' on our records so quick. Wouldn't ya know it, that smacked up bitch Synth gets a cheap one over us first time we get them sons of bitches back in the ring! UBER But if ya'll think that's a good thing, more fool you. See all it's done is pissed us off! BIG FRANK And Mardi Gras, you boys are in the unenviable position. You're the beta test for the pissed off Sooners, Version 9,000,000.0! Featuring the Soonerline, upgraded for 2008, with 800MB of *WHAM!* Compatible with all chest cavities! UBER OW OWWWWWii [COLOR=orange][i]HELDDOWN~![/COLOR][/i] *DINGDINGDING!* With The Sooners comments comes the opening bell, Big Frank and Uber rushing their opponents at the outset! Uber takes Rico and Frank takes Soul clubbing them with forearms against the ropes. Setting them up, Uber and Frank then send The MGHWC off the ropes with stereo irish whips, loading up those SOONERLINES... but Rico and Lucius grab onto the top rope and drag themselves out of the ring to safety! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" SCHIAVONE That was almost the worst possible start for The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew. VENTURA No doubt. A couple of Soonerlines and it could have been curtains. Once they've got their gameplan re-assessed, Rico and Lucius high-five and break the huddle. It's Lucius to start off officially with Frank and surprisingly he doesn't look overly concerned. Lucius jigs over to Big Frank and locks up, jockeying for position. Frank doesn't do much in the way of jockeying though. And as Lucius struggles to move his larger opponent, Frank eventually gets bored and shoves him unceremoniously to the mat! Up sits Soul, looking shocked, as Big Frank shows off his mega-biceps. SOUL Naw, naw, dat just ain't right! As Frank flexes the double biceps, Lucius complains to the referee and orders that he check Frank out. Despite the fact he's wearing no elbowpads. Referee Robinson makes this point, but Soul ducks his head through the ropes, refusing to continue until the check is made. VENTURA If Lucius is trying to play mind-games with The Sooners, he's wasting his time. The crowd get on the Nawlins native's back. But once he's sure that Frank isn't concealing any foreign objects [i]under his skin[/i], Lucius is good to go again. Another lock-up and this time Lucius doesn't try to match power, grabbing a side headlock. Big Frank just shoves Lucius off into the ropes with ease though. Underneath the elbow goes Lucius, rebounding back with good speed. But that speed just runs him into a shoulder check, knocking him clean off of his feet! Lucius scurries to the outside as the fired up Big Frank drops down and does some push-ups in the centre of the ring to show how easy life is right now! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!" VENTURA Told ya! There's some mind games right back from two of the best! SCHIAVONE The Sooner Bruisers can intimidate you like no other team in the OAOAST. Size, strength and plenty of unpredictability. Lucius slides back into the ring, solely to tag Rico in legally before bailing back out. A bit more even in size are Frank and Rico, the Brazilian confident enough to lock-up with Frank even after his partner's failings. Frank quickly shifts behind Rico into a waistlock, picking him up off his feet and dumping him face-first. The former NCAA All American then rides Rico, who has no answer to it what-so-ever, except scramble out of the ring when Frank stops to paintbrush him in the back of the head. Getting tired of the stoppages, Big Frank opens up the ropes and 'invites' Rico back inside as he stands on the floor, thoughtfully stroking his porn 'stache. SCHIAVONE And Uber's not going to stand for this. Not at all, as he breaks up a Mardi Gras pow-wow and pitches Rico back into the ring! Big Frank quickly goes back on the offence on Rico... ...but as Uber turns to go back to his corner, he suddenly hits the deck off a CHOPBLOCK by Lucius!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The referee doesn't see it, only spotting Lucius as he rushes back to the corner. Big Frank meanwhile has Rico up over his head in a Gorilla Press and slams him hard to the canvas. He covers... 1... 2... NO! VENTURA Big power there by Frank, but what he doesn't realise yet is that his partner is out on the floor, looking in a real bad way from where I'm sitting! Shoving Rico into a neutral corner, Frank clubs him across the chest with a forearm. And again. Referee Robinson tells him to get out of the corner and he does, bringing Rico with him by the hair. Whip off the ropes and Rico gets sent around the world, driven down with a real bad landing off the Tilt-A-Whirl Suplex! But as Frank gets up to make a tag, he notices for the first time his brother Uber laid out on the arena floor, distracting him while Rico crawls over to tag out. SCHIAVONE Uber looks hurt Jesse. VENTURA No doubt, when these Sooners stay down you know there's something to stay down for. Lucius clipped out that knee from the back, could have done any number of things to the leg. Ligaments, tendons, if Uber had that foot planted then anything could have gone. As Frank starts to leave the ring to check on his brother, the referee tries to convince him to stay in the ring. Under duress, he does... but as he goes back after Rico, he instead finds Lucius and a Bicycle Kick to the jaWii Down goes Frank, prompting Lucius to dive on top with an eager cover... 1... 2... NO! Mounting Frank, Lucius keeps the pressure on with some right hands before tagging Rico back in. SCHIAVONE And now it's two on one, for the time being at least. VENTURA Which Rico and Lucius are going to have to take advantage of. Simple as that. Lucius holds Frank open, for a boot to the ribs from Rico. The Mardi Gras partiers then combine to hit Big Frank with a Double Back Suplex, for another pin attempt... 1... 2... No! Crawling to his corner, Frank finds no respite as Uber continues to lie injured on the outside. Rico follows Frank in, taking a punch to the gut. And a second. But a rake of the eyes cuts off Frank's third shot, Rico then turning him around and smothering him against the middle turnbuckle. Once he's subdued Frank (and shrugged off the ref), Rico jogs over to make another exchange with Lucius. Leaping in over the top, Lucius measures The Man Of Tommorrow as he pulls himself up in the corner... AND LEVELS HIM WITH A YAKUZA KICK IN THE CORNER!! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" A schoolboy brings Frank down out of the corner... 1... 2... NO!! Lucius gets right on Robinson's case about the count, before he notices Uber starting to pull himself back onto the apron. One kick sends him back to the floor, the left leg clattering off the concrete for good measure. VENTURA That's right, no time to be griping with the referee. The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew have to press home this advantage while it's there! Grabbing Frank in a facelock, Lucius tries to drag him over to his corner. Moving the bigman is still a struggle though, so Rico doesn't wait for the tag and comes in anyway. Only the referee's five count can stop The Mardi Gras'ers from their double-team and they're well within that as they hit a double back elbow off a whip. Lucius feeds Rico his foot for the Assisted Standing Moonsault and hooks a deep leg... 1... 2... Kickout! This time a legal tag is made, to bring Rico back in, geed up by Lucius as he enters. "RI - CO SUCKS!" "RI - CO SUCKS!" "RI - CO SUCKS!" "RI - CO SUCKS!" Getting distracted briefly with the fans, Rico allows Frank to get a shot in from his knees! Frank lands two more punches to the gut and gets to his feet, crossing Rico's eyes with a big haymaker. The Brazilian fires back with a right hand of his own. But he makes the mistake of running the ropes, telegraphing a clothesline and falling prey to a German Suplex as Big Frank ducks the shot! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" SCHIAVONE You cannot underestimate the toughness of The Sooner Bruisers! Frank has been in there two on one all match, but he simply refuses to stay down. Lucius runs in and heaves Frank to his feet... but cannot heave him onto his shoulders for the F2S. A second attempt, no joy. So Soul rethinks, whipping Frank into the Mardi Gras corner. Soul backs up and throws himself at Frank with the Soul Brother Splash... NO! Big Frank sidesteps and GETS THE TAG to Uber! SCHIAVONE Here comes little brother! VENTURA But will the leg hold out on him? Obviously Lucius doesn't think so, having saved himself by landing on the bottom rope. He smiles as Uber hobbles into the ring, sprinting at the injured Sooner... ...AND GETTING CLUBBED DOWN WITH A SOONERLINE!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" SCHIAVONE Oh-ho-ho! Looks like it will Jesse! Uber hops past the motionless Lucius, spotting Rico as he charges with a double axehandle weilded. Catching Rico coming, Uber turns and throws him with a T-BONE SUPLEX, one leg and all! 1... 2... ...Lucius saves! Hobbling, Uber gets up but fails to get the first shot in on Lucius. A kick to the kneecap drops the 260 pounder Bruiser in a heap, Soul quickly barring the leg into a halfcrab! VENTURA Uber's howling. But he's howling in pain tonight. SCHIAVONE What a feather in the cap it would be for The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew, to not only beat The Sooner Bruisers but to do so via a submission! VENTURA They may never have a better shot than now. Uber reaches out but is nowhere near the ropes and struggling to crawl any closer. Lucius wrenches on the knee, yelling at Uber to give it up. Just as Uber is looking to be in trouble though, big brother Frank re-enters the ring. After a shot to the back he drags Lucius off of Uber, butterflying the arms and drilling him to the canvas with a powerbomb!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Flipping him over, Big Frank decides to kick back into the LAY-Z-BOY! VENTURA Now, who's the legal man here Schiavone!? And don't give me that 'I don't think it matters' crap you usually pull when you don't wanna answer! SCHIAVONE Well, if you know the answer already, why are you asking me? VENTURA I just wanna hear you say it! SCHIAVONE Okay then, Uber is legal... VENTURA Right! So why's the referee allowing Big Frank to stay in the ring if he's not legal? SCHIAVONE Well neither is Lucius. VENTURA So two wrongs make a right now? With Lucius shaking his head vehemently, Rico steps in to save his partner. A shot to the back of the head breaks the hold and Rico pitches Frank out of the ring. Rather than leave with him though, Lucius is helped to his feet to assist in a double team on Uber. SCHIAVONE Now, Lucius still isn't legal. VENTURA He's got a five count to get in and out Tony. Read the rulebook sometime. The MGHWC set up Uber for a double irish whip. On one leg he navigates his way back off the ropes, stopping short of the ducked heads and dropping Lucius and Rico with a DOUBLE DDT!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!" Back in comes Big Frank, clotheslining Lucius up and over the top, to the floor. The Man Of Tommorrow then catches Rico with a boot to the gut, ducking his head and taking The King Of The Mardi Gras up into the electric chair! SCHIAVONE Look out, could be the beginning of the end... Frank positions himself in front of the turnbuckles and Uber limps over. But as he tries to go up top, his leg gives out on him and he waves to his brother that he can't go up. So Frank re-adjusts. Getting his arms out in front, Frank flips Rico forward, catching him around the waist and SPIKING HIM INTO THE MAT WITH THE 69 DRIVER!!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" SCHIAVONE Well, one way or the other! VENTURA That is end of the end. You could count to a hundred. Frank stands guard, as Uber limps over to apply the pin... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING!* SCHIAVONE And The Sooners are going to the Conference Final! BUFFER Here are your winners, advancing on in the 2008 Anderson Cup... THE SSOOOOOOOOOOONNEEEERRRR BBRRRUUUUUUIIIIIISSSSEEEEEERRRRRSSSSSS!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" Deciding not to try and get back in, Lucius just stands on the outside holding his head having seen his partner get impaled before his eyes as "Frankenstein" hits. Uber has to use the ropes to pull himself up, still cringing at the pain in his knee. Big Frank shows his concern, only flexing [i]one[/i] bicep while he helps Uber get his feet with the other. SCHIAVONE The Homewrecking Crew had a gameplan. Isolate one Sooner, take out the other. And it seemed like it was working, if not for the determination and fighting spirit of these Sooner Bruisers. Uber fought through the pain and Big Frank fought the odds, meaning they will fight in the Conference Final next week against Christian Wright and Theodore Moneymaker, who can't be too pleased right now. VENTURA Maybe not, but there's a glimmer of hope in that left knee of Uber which I'm sure hasn't gone unnoticed in Enterprise Towers. Rico is dragged off to the back as The Sooners celebrate their victory. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
