Promo: The bag lady, the theif, and the wrestler.

[Retard Girl 0]

The scene opens with a wide shot of a large grocery store. There is the usual mid afternoon activity going on; mothers with three kids, guys in pickup trucks getting lunch for the crew, little old men smoking cigars on the benches outside. From the corner we see someone pushing an empty cart. She appears to be a bag lady, short and fat, of indeterminable age. With the big floppy hat, tattered coat, and huge wraparound sunglasses, it was hard to tell what she looked like. The camera follows this little round woman as she pushes her cart to the edge of the parking lot, way in the back. Suddenly the wheels lock up.

 

"Fuck." says the woman, stomping the ground in frustration. She takes off her hat, throws off her coat, and pulls her skirt up over her head. It turns out that underneath those billowing layers is none other than Taiga Star!

 

She reaches into a pocket of the coat she was wearing, and pulls out a grocery store quality wheel lock unlocker. "These are pretty handy to have around!" Taiga says as she unlocks the wheels.

 

She throws everything in the cart and makes her way through a small overgrown area into what appears to be the rear of another large parking lot.

 

We can hear her sigh. "I know I should have taken the truck."

 

As Taiga makes her way back to the arena, cart in tow, somebody is watching her. Annie Eclectic is peering at her from behind a dumpster. "This chick is interesting," she says, "Do I kick the crap out of her, or should I just wait to see what she does. I am getting older. Blargle..."

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

*Start humming the Mission Impossible" theme now.*

 

 

Taiga peeks out from behind the corner, peering down the hallway. At the end was a door labeled with a sign that read "Janitor: No Entrance". Taiga peers up and down the hallway again before creeping out. Behind her she attempts to pull the carriage silently, but is not having much luck with it.

 

She pulls up to the janitor's closet, looks around again for other people. She tries the door... it's locked! Taiga reaches into her pocket and retrieves a utility knife. Seconds later she has the door open. She finds the light switch and stands there in amazement.

 

"Whoa... jackpot!" She is amazed at the selection of objects that could be used in her hardcore match that evening. Quickly she fills the cart with select items. She sneaks out the same way she snuck in, looking around carefully and attempting to make as little noise as possible. Locking the door, she scurries down the hall back to the locker room.

 

 

*You may stop humming now.*

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

Sitting on top of a crate, backstage at the arena in Grand Rapids, is Taiga Star. Next to the crate sits her shopping cart full of junk. She looks up to see a beautiful woman walking down the hall to her, wearing a little green dress. Taiga doesn't immediately recognize her; she's seen her in the halls before but has never met her. The woman walks up to her with a microphone, and conveniently, a cameraman walks out of nowhere.

 

"Taiga Star?" the woman says enthusiastically, "Emma Dumas!" She extends a hand to Taiga.

 

Taiga laughs a little and accepts the handshake. "Emma?"

 

"Dumas." She smiles and stares at Taiga blankly, still shaking her hand. Taiga tightens the grip and Emma lets go. "Taiga, I'm here to ask you about your match against the Insane Luchador tonight. It's a hardcore match. Why do you do those so often?"

 

"Well," Taiga says, "I keep getting booked in them, that's the main reason why I've done so many. I like doing them because I can let my creativity flow, you know? Use all kinds of objects to maim an opponent."

 

"Don't you get all... dirty though?" Emma makes a disgusted face.

 

"What, you have a problem with getting a little dirty sometimes?"

 

"Most girls don't." Emma replies.

 

Taiga laughs loudly, startling Emma. "I'm not most girls!" With a huge smile, she gently takes the microphone out of Emma's hands. "And I'm always out to prove that. Insane Luchadore, I see that you have a pretty good track record in the SWF. But don't for a moment let that make you think you're going to have an easy night tonight. Every gets so hung up on the 'girl' thing. It's ridiculous. I'm a wrestler, and a pretty damn good one at that. Even though I have boobs. Even though I'm only five-foot-four *ahem*inboots*ahem*. These are things that I have no problems overcoming. They are not obstacles that hinder me. If anything, it means that I've had to work harder to get to where I am today. All that hard work pays off, Ill One.

 

"You claim to be insane? I know a thing or two about insanity. Wrestling? Especially Hardcore matches." Taiga looks at Emma. "These things keep me same. You enjoy taking hard bumps and bleeding? I hope so, because it's going to be a long night... and I look forward to it."

 

Taiga gives the mic back to Emma, "Thank you, Ms. Dumas."

 

Emma looks a bit dejected but just as blank as ever. "Um... thank... you... for your time... Taiga."

 

 

The scene fades out.

[AnnieEclectic 0]

hee hee. thats'a me!

 

-Annie