FTF Losing Match thread

[Rawknight 0]

“Viewers of a nervous disposition would be well advised to take the next few minutes off,” warns Mak Francis, “As we prepare for some blood and violence with a Flaming Tables match”

 

“Someone is going through a table tonight, Mak,” replies The Suicide King, “and that table is going to be covered in flammable liquid and set on fire. This is one of those types of match where serious injury is always a possibility.”

 

“It takes a special kind of athlete to compete in this sort of match”

 

“You'd have to be psychotically violent or completely insane to want to. So Landon Maddix picked the exact two wrestlers for that task.”

 

PITO SUTE AKInsane LuchadorAGI!

It ain't good, it ain't good 'cos you'll get jumped in my hood!

PITO SUTE AKInsane LuchadorAGI!

It ain't good, it ain't good 'cos you'll get jumped in my hood!

 

As the shouts of Savage ring out, Va'aiga enters the arena through the SWF entrance gate. Instead of his normal boxer's robe the Maori is wearing a VDN T-shirt and holding aloft a customised folding chair with tribal patterns drawn on it. “Va'aiga has come dressed for a fight,” comments Mak. “As opposed to a birthday party?” replies King with a smirk.

 

Va'aiga walks slowly down towards ringside, stopping for his customary shout into the camera - “Insane Luchador! TONIGHT YOU GONNA BURN!” - before rolling into the ring and holding his chair up high for the crowd to see. Funyon blasts out his introduction, “LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE FOLLWING CONTEST IS A FLAMING TABLES MATCH WHERE THE ONLY WAY OTO WIN IS TO PUT YOUR OPONENT THROUGH A TABLE WHICH IS ON FIRE! INTRODUCING FIRST, FROM ROTORUA, NEW ZEALAND... THE MAORI BADASS... VAAAAAAAAAAA'AAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNGAAAAAAAA!”

 

The lights dim to a near blackout as a lone figure walks into the entrance gate. “Man in the Box” starts up and there is a blue glow lighting up the shadowed figure of the Insane Luchador eminating from his trademark sword of light tubes.

 

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURN MY EYES!

Now you're so damn sure,

JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESUS CHRIST!

Deny your maker.

 

With the chorus red and black flares light up the arena as The Ill One rushes down to the ring. The lights go back up as The Insane One rolls into the ring. Funyon gets about “AND HIS OPPONENT...” off before he is forced to flee from the ring as Insane Luchador slides his weapon of choice into a free corner and LAUNCHES himself at the Maori, flying in with a forearm that staggers Va'aiga. The Maori swings his chair forcefully but the quicker Insane Luchador ducks and slides towards his stashed “Excalibur”. Va'aiga draws back his chair, The Luchador picks up his makeshift sword and the pair face off. “A fast start from The Insane Luchador,” comments Mak Francis as Nick Soapdish belatedly calls for the bell...

 

DINGDINGDING!

 

“And we're officially under way,” comments Mak. “I think these two have been ready to fight for days now, Mak,” replies King, “There's more than a little tension between the wrestlers.” The Insane Luchador swings his sword o' tubes wildly, Va'aiga backing off a half step to avoid the blow. The Maori responds with a huge overhead swing of his chair, looking to cave in the Luchador's skull. Insane Luchador backs off and with a massive downward slice brings Excalibur down towards the Maori's head but Va'aiga lifts his chair up to block and with a satisfying pop, the sword splinters into a million pieces, showering the ring with fragments of broken glass. The Maori frowns at his opponent.

 

“Now even the ring has become a danger zone,” remarks Mak, “As if this match wasn't dangerous enough already. The Ill One squares up to his massive Maori opponent and begins kicking away at the legs of the Maori Badass. Va'aiga shrugs off the first couple of blows and lashes out with a loose punch, but Insane Luchador springs into a dropkick, knocking the Maori down to one knee and covering the side of his body with fine pieces of glass in the process. The Psychotic Hero smiles and ignores the small trickles of blood coming out of his body as he gets back to his feet. “The Insane Luchador is always to put his body on the line,” starts Mak only to be interrupted by King with a wry comment, “Insane isn't just a title you know Mak!”

 

Seeing Va'aiga still on one knee, Insane Luchador lashes out with a wild roundhouse kick to the back of Va'aiga's head. The Maori roars defiantly and stand up, Insane Luchador taking this rebuttal to his strike well in his stride as he fires himself off the ropes, flying in with another forearm but this time the Maori is wise and adjusts himself to catch the Luchador. With the Luchador trapped to the Maori's chest Va'aiga screams out “DROOOOOOOP!” and backs off a few steps, looking to drive the Ill One down into the canvas but Insane Luchador has NO desire to get Maori Dropped and kicks his legs out, grabbing one of the Maori's arms and taking the big man off his feet with an arm drag! Now both men come up covered in glass fragments, Va'aiga brushing himself down as Insane Luchador takes a moment to consider his next move. Meanwhile the camera focuses in on the timekeeper's table where several bottles of lighter fluid are waiting to be used.

 

“What would your strategy be for this match, King?” asks Mak Francis. “Don't get involved. The Suicide King has always been too important to this company to risk roasting, Mak.” replies King. In the ring Insane Luchador spins towards Va'aiga and attempts to smack the Maori upside his head with a backfist, but Va'aiga ducks and grabs Insane Luchador in a back suplex position. Va'aiga lifts The Ill One up and turns, dumping him crotch first over the top rope to a reflexive chorus of oohs from the men in the audience. Va'aiga points down to the ringside area and the crowd gasps as Va'aiga runs up to the ropes and slingshots himself over, bundling himself and Insane Luchador down to the ring floor in a crumpled heap! “HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!” is the crowd's expert opinion. “Not the last time we'll hear that chant in this match,” predicts Mak Francis.

 

Both wrestlers take time getting to their feet from the ungainly mess of humanity on the floor. Insane Luchador raises first and kicks away a couple of times at the Maori as he stands up. Va'aiga grunts, shaking off the blows and grabs for an arm of Insane Luchador, but Insane Luchador turns the arm wrench round and looses off a crane wing kick. Va'aiga staggers backwards and Insane Luchador uses his catlike balance to hop onto the guardrail, take a few ginger steps and dive off wrapping his arm around Va'aiga's head and driving his cranium down into the ringside mats! The Insane One gets back to his feet and searches under the ring apron for something. “I think we're looking at the debut of the table in this match!” remarks Mak.

 

Rummaging around under the ring The Insane Luchador find what he's looking for – to the surprise of the crowd it's not a table... BUT A LADDER! The crowd busts out a “ESS DUBYA EFF!” chant as Insane Luchador leans the ladder against the ring apron. Insane Luchador checks on Va'aiga who is slowly regaining his feet before rushing up the ladder and jumps off, turning in mid flight and catching Va'aiga with a HUGE plancha! And that earns another “HOLY SHIT!”

 

“Insane Luchador playing to his strengths here, keeping it airborne and keeping it fast,” Mak adds as the crowd takes in the visual spectacle on a SmarkTron replay. The Insane Luchador stands, clutching his ribs and staring down at Va'aiga on the ring floor. With a smirk to himself Insane Luchador reaches into the ring and picks up the chair that Va'aiga was forced to discard earlier. As Va'aiga gets up onto his knees The Ill One holds the chair high above his head and SMASHES the chair into Va'aiga's skull. Va'aiga looks up and ROARS at The Psychotic Hero. Another FAT chairshot crashes into the Maori's cranium and the Maori ROOOOOARS again! “You just CANNOT target that big thick skull!” shouts King, “Va'aiga just does NOT feel pain through it!”

 

With a look like thunder on his face Va'aiga snarls at his Insane opponent and begins wildly

throwing lefts and rights into the face of the Ill One. Insane Luchador rocks a little but with his enormous stamina, The Insane Luchador absorbs the force of Va'aiga's rapid blows and grabs for the ladder, overbalancing it so it falls on the Maori with a resounding crash! Va'aiga reels backwards as Insane Luchador runs up the collapsing ladder! Va'aiga clumsily pushes the ladder away but Insane Luchador has already leaped off and he drives his feet into the Maori's oversized gut! “Ugly,” comments King, “but effective.”

 

Dropping down to ground level Insane Luchador takes a top mount on Va'aiga and hammers a few forearms into the face of the Maori. Va'aiga digs deep into his arsenal and wraps his legs around Insane Luchador's back, closing the guard. Unable to get any distance, Insane Luchador is forced to stop striking and draw deep in his wrestling moveset to look for an arm submission, but Va'aiga draws his legs in and attempts to stand, lifting Insane Luchador off the ground. The Ill One releases the hold and drops to the ground. “He had to relinquish the hold, “ commentates Mak, “Or that could have lead to a nasty powerbomb.”

 

Insane Luchador earns a round of flashes from photographers in the crowd as he stylishly kips up and again he moves quickly in, kicking away at the massive form of his opponent. Va'aiga winces a little and backs off, but as Insane Luchador sense a chance and leaps in, Va'aiga ducks and grabs for the ladder, picking it up and swinging it wildly, crashing it into the Luchador's chest. Insane Luchador emits a sharp gasp of air and staggers backwards as Va'aiga carefully places the ladder between the ring apron and guardrail. The Maori quickly grabs Insane Luchador, locks in a solid front facelock, before lifting The Ill One high above his head ina vertical suplex. The crowd counts how long Va'aiga keeps Insane Luchador high in the air.

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

THREE!

 

“Look at the strength of the Maori Badass!” calls Mak.

 

 

FOUR!

 

 

 

FIVE!

 

 

 

“It's not pleasant to be up in that suplex,” remarks King, “All the blood rushing to your head can cause you to red out.”

 

 

SIX!

 

 

 

SE... and Va'aiga turns a little and finishes the suplex by dumping Insane Luchador back first across the ladder! With little regard for his own safety Va'aiga climbs up onto the ring apron and dives onto Insane Luchador's prone form with an elbow drop! The ladder buckles under the force of the impact and the sheer weight of the Maori. Va'aiga grunts in pain and slides back down to floor level. With Insane Luchador still lying on the ladder, the Maori ducks underneath and TORTURE RACKS THE LADDER! Va'aiga turns so the ladder is parallel to the ring and flips it off his shoulders, crashing it down onto the mat, Insane Luchador underneath! “Va'aiga is busting out some innovative offence tonight King,” Mak comments as Va'aiga picks up the ladder, hooks an arm between the bars and SUPLEXES THE LADDER ONTO THE INSANE LUCHADOR! Deciding he's had enough time on the outside for a while Va'aiga rolls Insane Luchador back into the ring.

 

“This match has already become dangerous and we haven't even got the tables out,” Mak remarks.

 

“Or the fire. Let's not forget about the fire!” King adds.

 

The Maori considers his next move, knowing full well that ANYTHING he does in the ring has the added damage of bits of Exaclibur thrown in. The Maori decides to keep it simple first off, casually dragging Insane Luchador up to his feet, moving round and taking a back waistlock. Insane Luchador struggles to get loose but is unable to prevent Va'aiga from German Suplexing him with AUTHORITY! Insane Luchador bounces off the mat with the impact sending a cloud of light tube dust up from the mat. The exclamation mark is added with a few stiff stomps.

 

Raising his arm up, throwing the Shaka sign and shouting a loud “BOO-YAH!”to the crowd, Va'aiga takes a moment's break from the assault before lining up a headbutt drop on his prone opponent. Insane Luchador, however, has enough wherewithal to roll away and Va'aiga crashes face first into the mat. The Ill One stands and dusts some of the glass off of himself, as Va'aiga looks up, his tattooed face now punctuated by some small trickles of blood. “These guys will take any risks to hurt each other,” comments Mak.

 

“You know these two men Mak. I'm not sure they even feel pain.” King replies as Insane Luchador waits for Va'aiga to stand. Measuring him up, Insane Luchador rushes in and wraps an arm around Va'aiga's neck and snapping off a quick DDT, ramming the Maori's head back into the mat. Insane Luchador grabs Va'aiga's dreadlocks and rubs his face in the mat. Insane Luchador shouts something thankfully not picked up by the ring mic and stands, kicking away at Va'aiga's ribs as the Maori stares up at him though the blood and scowls.

 

Bouncing off the ropes, Insane Luchador leaps into the air and drops a leg across the back of the Maori's neck. Another grunt comes from the Maori as he slowly gets back to his feet, only to be met with a trifecta of rapid roundhouse kicks from Insane Luchador. The Ill One smirks and throws the Shaka sign himself, lining up a head kick from his other leg... only to have his leg caught by Va'aiga! The Maori screams “OH NO YOU DID NOT!” before grabbing Insane Luchador round the waist with his other arm, falls backwards and suplexing Insane Luchador down to the mat. “The lesson here,” says King with a smirk, “is do NOT make fun of the Maori,”

 

Grabbing an arm and hoisting the Insane Luchador up to his feet, Va'aiga uncoils an Irish Whip, flinging Insane Luchador against the ropes. The Luchador rebounds as Va'aiga shapes to shoulder block him down, but Insane Luchador is wise to Va'aiga's basic tactic and leapfrogs over the massive Maori. Insane Luchador's momentum carries him into the ropes on the opposite side and as Va'aiga turns Insane Luchador rolls into a Koppo kick, knocking the Maori down. “Insane Luchador just rolled through glass to lay more hurt on Va'aiga!” Mak shouts. “And I say again. Insane Luchador, the clue's in the name!” replies King.

 

Using the whole of his strength Insane Luchador drags Va'aiga up into an Irish Whip, sending the Maori into the corner. The Ill One backs up into the opposite corner and charges across the ring, flying at Va'aiga knee first and driving his patella into the side of the Maori's skull. More impressively the Luchador grabs onto the ropes to steady himself before bouncing back out, turning in mid flight and hitting Va'aiga with a bulldog on the rebound! “The Insane Luchador is one hell of an athlete!” Mak shouts.

 

The Maori takes his time standing up, allowing The Psychotic Hero time to climb up onto the ropes for the first time in the match. Insane Luchador carefully examines the position of the Maori, lining himself up for a precise move. “The Insane Luchador is going high risk again!” calls Mak Francis. Va'aiga turns slowly to face his opponent, IL jumps off with a cross body with HUGE airtime... BUT VA'AIGA CATCHES HIM AND SNAPS OFF A QUICK MAORI DROP! Va'aiga scoots backwards to create a little space, stands and beckons The Ill One to get up...

 

Va'aiga rushes at the Insane Luchador with malice in his eyes. The Ill One doesn't have time to get away as Va'aiga extends a leg and BLASTS him with a Yakuza kick. Not even pausing to draw breath the Maori picks the Ill One off the mat and fires in one of those famous left jabs. Anticipating what's coming the crowd begins to chant along...

 

ONE!

 

Quickly a second left jab staggers the Luchador, rocking him with a solid connection to the jaw...

 

TWO!

 

A third jab meets the Ill One's chin and the shorter man reels in pain...

 

THREE!

 

Va'aiga pauses to kiss his right fist as the crowd warms up...

 

OoooooooOOOOOOOAAAAAHH...

 

And the Maori fires in that big right hook, sending The Psychotic Hero down to the mat. Everyone in the arena knows what's coming next... a Shaka Sign and a loud

 

BOO-YAH!

 

Not wanting to rest on his laurels, Va'aiga quickly drags the Ill One back to his feet again, drawing Insane Luchador's arm across his own throat. Va'aiga traps this arm in place with a Half Nelson. The blood stained, tattoo marked face of the Maori contorts into a sick smile as he falls backwards and SPLATS Insane Luchador into the canvas head first with the Swiss Suplex! With The Ill One down on the canvas and stunned Va'aiga rolls out of the ring to look for that match winning object. “The Maori Badass is feeling it tonight!” calls Mak.

 

 

The Maori fumbles around under the ring and grabs a table, sliding it quickly into the ring. Calling over to the timekeeper, Va'aiga gets the bottle of lighter fluid passed up into him as The Ill One lies in the middle of the ring. “This could be it,” calls Mak, “Va'aiga is going for the table.”

 

“It's how you win this sort of match,” points out King sarkily.

 

Carefully setting up the table, Va'aiga looks back to see his opponent has rolled out of the ring! “Insane Luchador, Insane stamina!” shouts Mak Francis. Va'aiga walks over to the ropes, only to be smacked with a MUCH BIGGER LADDER that Insane Luchador has found under the ring. The Maori is taken off balance allowing Insane Luchador time to slide first the ladder, them himself into the ring. Va'aiga backs off, but given a few steps run up decides that it's that time, that stage of the match to go for the NASTY, EVInsane Luchador, VICIOUS, PSYCHOTIC AND OH MY GOD Insane Luchador DUCKS THE LARIAT! Va'aiga's momentum carries him into the ring ropes and as he rebounds Insane Luchador wraps an arm round the Maori's massive neck, jumps a little and SPIKES VA'AIGA WITH THE IMPANT DDT INTO A PATCH OF BROKEN GLASS! “That could be the kill shot... all Insane Luchador has to do is get the Maori Badass through a table!” screams Mak!

 

With his opponent's face now pouring blood, Insane Luchador smiles to himself and liberally douses the table in the ring with lighter fluid. The Ill One slides the Maori onto the table then turns to the ladder and sets it up in the middle of the ring. Insane Luchador climbs about halfway up the ladder and then fumbles around for something stashed on his person. The crowd draws breath in anticipation as Insane Luchador finds what he was looking for – a match! Insane Luchador strikes the match and casually throws it down onto the table SETTING BOTH IT AND THE MAORI ALIGHT! “This is it! The table is alight! All The Insane Luchador has to do is finish the Maori off,” calls Mak

 

“HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!” is the crowd's considered response. The Ill One looks down at the conflagration as he climbs to the top of the ladder. Looking upwards Insane Luchador grabs hold of the base of the basketball scoreboard and hauls himself up onto the massive suspended structure! Va'aiga still looks out on the table as Insane Luchador turns around, pauses for a second and...

 

LEAPS OFF!

 

 

 

TWISTS HIS BODY ROUND IN THE AIR!

 

 

SAILS GRACEFULLY DOWN FROM 20 FOOT PLUS ABOVE THE RING!

 

 

 

 

 

AND... CRASHES THROUGH THE BURNING TABLE AS VA'AIGA ROLLS OUT OF THE WAY!

 

 

“HOLY F'N SHIT! HOLY F'N SHIT!”

 

“You can't afford to take that long!” shouts King as Va'aiga frantically tears off his smoking shirt, “And now Insane Luchador could well have broken something, like EVERY BONE IN HIS BODY!” EMTs rush out from the back to check on Insane Luchador's status as Va'aiga, realising that the match is still not over, rolls out and sets up another table at ringside. An EMT checks The Ill One for consciousness, and The Psychotic Hero defiantly tries to order them away. The crowd drops to a sort of awestruck silence, tinged with more than a little worry for the ever popular Insane Luchador.

 

“This sort of match brings it's own dangers,” comments Mak. “So why do you need to add your OWN extra dangers to the match?” asks King.

 

“That's just the way that these two competitors work, I guess”

 

Spewing forth some choice swear words, The Ill One orders the EMTs to “Back the fuck off” among other things. Attempting to prove his indestructability one more time Insane Luchador, to a round of cheers from the crowd, slowly gathers himself together and stands, turning to look for his opponent who unfortunately has re-entered the ring and started on a charge. The beaten, burned and bloodied Insane Luchador gets a brief seconds respite before being SPLATTERED with a VICIOUS, NASTY, SECOND TIME LUCKY, SUCKS TO BE YET ANOTHER VICTIM OF THE... LAAAAAAAAAARIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

“THE LARIAT! THE LARIAT! THE LARIAT!” bawls Mak Francis as Insane Luchador is flipped clean over and collapses in a heap. Va'aiga grabs the loose lighter fluid bottle and squirts the flammable stuff over the table outside the ring. Picking up the near lifeless heap of The Ill One, Va'aiga hauls Insane Luchador over his shoulder and in a final, possibly merciful act, tosses Insane Luchador roughly over the top rope and through the table on the outside. Nick Soapdish calls for the final bell

 

DINGDINGDING!

 

Fortunately for Insane Luchador the EMTs are still milling around the ringside area and quickly put him out again. “THE WINNER OF THIS MATCH... VAAAAAAA'AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIINGAAAAAAAAAAA!” shouts Funyon as Va'aiga throws the Shaka sign and offers a “BOO-YAH!” to the crowd. Va'aiga absorbs the cheers of the crowd but as Insane Luchador, defiant even in defeat, stands up under his own power the crowd noise level raises and eventually the crowd is swept up in appreciation, giving Insane Luchador a standing ovation as he walks back up the entrance ramp. “These two wrestlers have laid their bodies on the line,” says Mak in a solemn voice, “and we got a hell of a match.”

[Retard Girl 0]

is this the only losing match?

 

am i seriously the only one that showed for my match?

 

winning my default is no fun. that's like winning the village because you were the only one not to die from the plauge. or something.

[Dace59 0]

Nope, MANSON showed as well. Losing matches don't always get posted. Though some ones really rock. I'll sit down and read this before I get on with the rest of my comments. Mmm Hardcore spots

[Retard Girl 0]

i'm interested to see how someone else writes me... if that makes any sence.

[Dace59 0]

Yeah, I know how that is. I'm not going to post the loosing match, but I like MANSON's style so he should go for it. I think some of best bits of Dace Night came from other people. Tom Flesher certainly for one.

[Toxxic 0]

While both Va'aiga's and IL's matches were good, although somewhat no-sell heavy on both counts (), IL's nabbed it because it flowed a little better and had a better overall story. Va'aiga's match had some kickass spots, IL's seemed to be more of an actual match. Even little things like having King plug Frost Brand cigars, and then later have that cigar used to light the table. It was just more cohesive.

[Rawknight 0]

While both Va'aiga's and IL's matches were good, although somewhat no-sell heavy on both counts (), IL's nabbed it because it flowed a little better and had a better overall story. Va'aiga's match had some kickass spots, IL's seemed to be more of an actual match. Even little things like having King plug Frost Brand cigars, and then later have that cigar used to light the table. It was just more cohesive.

 

And IL didn't fuck up by using find and replace to look for a few extra words and botch the entrances in the process! Note to self.. do not put yourself under such time pressure that you don't have time to proofread.

 

 

[Toxxic 0]

You had an EVInsane Luchador LARIATOOOOO as well, but I decided not to mention that.

[Retard Girl 0]

i still would like to read Manson's match