King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted May 8, 2008 "Superstar" by Lupe Fiasco hits as we return to HeldDOWN~! in Birmingham. The red carpet is out and treading it is one, not both, of the Beverly Hills Blonds. Simon Singleton is not quite a singleton on the stage though, as trekking behind him on his way to the ring is Molly Nerdly, carrying with her the trusty Siclopse. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by MOLLY NERDLY! Weighing two hundred, twenty five pounds and hailing from Beverly Hills, California... representing The Enterprise... "BOX OFFICE"... SSIIIIIIMMOOOOOOOOOONN... SSSIIIIIIIINNGGLLLLEEEEETTOOOOOOOONN!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Simon aids his unpaid intern in getting the Siclopse properly set up to his liking, before he slides into the ring. But it's not Simon the fans care about tonight though. As opposed to any night, I guess, but work with me. "OOOOOOOOIIIIIIII!" "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE That reaction can only mean one thing! That one thing being the entrance of Jamie O'Hara, to a roaring reception that drowns out "Fix Up, Look Sharp" and rivals any reaction O'Hara has probably heard in his life. J-OH is taken aback for a moment before firing up and striding to the ring fist-pumping with his bretheren. BUFFER And his opponent... from BIRMINGHAM, ENGLAND!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" BUFFER Weighing in at one hundred, seventy six pounds... "THE BIRMINGHAM BAD BOY"... JJJAAAAAAAAMMMIIIIIEEEEEEE... OOOOO'HHHAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAA!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE What a great reaction for the returning hero, Jamie O'Hara, Birmingham's own! COACH And what a surprise that AngleSault's stuck one of The Enterprise against the hometown boy. O'Hara vaults into the ring and scales the turnbuckles to fire up the crowd some more, before somersaulting back into centre ring. *DINGDINGDING!* "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" As the partizan crowd are whipped up by O'Hara, we see Molly Nerdly pressing the 'mute' button on the Siclopse to a thumbs up from Singleton. COLE Ned Blanchard, we are just hearing, has been barred from ringside for this match. He will not be a factor in this match. COACH Gee, I wonder who made that decision? COLE Well, AngleSault, obviously. O'Hara and Simon circle before lunging into a collar and elbow tie-up. Quick side headlock from Singleton earns a chorus of boosand sets the tone for the match for sure. O'Hara escapes with some shots to the ribs and sends Simon off, only to get knocked down with a shoulder tackle. "Rolling cameras", Simon hits the ropes again but O'Hara kips-up and takes him over with an armdrag! "YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Referee Mike Chioda backs Jamie up as Simon ducks through the ropes. COLE Singleton going to have to try and slow this match down, which is going to be easier said than done. It's hard enough to catch O'Hara on a bad day, but with the adrenaline of his hometown crowd cheering him he may be uncatchable! After getting his head in the game, Singleton weaves back inside and encourages his opponent to 'settle down'. Not an option, as another chant goes up for O'Hara. The two circle and lock-up again. This time Singleton comes out of it with the arm, wringing it into a hammerlock. O'Hara looks high and then low for an escape but Singleton keeps him in the hold. O'Hara drops and rolls to escape, coming out with a wristlock of his own. But a quick knee to the gut doubles him over. Clubbing forearm to the back. And a second. Simon then sends O'Hara off with an irish whip and ducks his head for a backdrop. Telegraphing it, O'Hara turns and goes back to back, getting flipped up and over onto his feet. As Singleton turns around, O'Hara then surprises him with a big hurricanrana takeover! A quick dropkick then sends Simon rolling to the floor. O'Hara gets the Birmingham crowd behind him again and as Simon pulls himself up on the outside, the SuperJay is on the move, hitting the ropes... but Singleton gets the HECK out of dodge and forces O'Hara to think twice about his dive! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COACH Smart thinking from Si'. COLE O'Hara needs no second invitation to take to the air and Simon's going to have to watch the skies tonight. Molly leaves her post at the Siclopse to offer Simon her support. The unpaid intern proves as much of a nuisance to Simon as everybody else at the moment though and he shrugs her off. Simon climbs back to the apron, but soon goes back down to the floor as O'Hara baseball slides the legs out... *THUD!* ...leaving Simon to crash face-first into the ring apron! COLE Look out again! The crowd rise as O'Hara sticks his foot on the gas again. Stuck in the line of fire, Molly Nerdly looks up in shock as O'Hara takes flight... ...and Molly pulls the Siclopse to safety, but not Si[i]mon[/i], who's left to move on his own power. O'Hara catches himself on the way over the top and lands safely on the apron, dropping a simple double axehandle on Simon as he takes his eye off the action. Turning Simon around, Jamie scoops him up and slams him on the outside. J-OH lets out a cheer, reciprocated by the crowd, climbing to the ring apron... AND HITTING A SHOOTING STAR PRESS OFF THE APRON!!! COLE OH MY!! "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" After some celebrations with his fans, O'Hara dumps Singleton back inside and follows with a cover... 1... 2... No! COLE High-risk, that's what Jamie O'Hara is all about. COACH And it's pretty spectacular, when it works. But when it doesn't you're in trouble. O'Hara rocks Simon against the ropes with a series of forearms before looking for the whip. A reversal by Simon sends O'Hara off instead, but he reacts and connects with a flying forearm. Leg hooked... 1... 2... No! Hooking The Video Voyeur up, Jamie sends another shout-out and looks for a suplex. Simon blocks the attempt twice though, then reverses and snap suplexes O'Hara over. COACH There we go Simon. Show them how they make 'em in the US! COLE Simon Singleton the patriot? Never thought I'd see the day. With the opening for the first time, Simon pins O'Hara's head to the canvas and drops a knee to the cheekbone. O'Hara rolls away into a corner, followed closely by Simon. An elbow to the cheekbone stuns O'Hara. Another. And a third. Singleton then pulls O'Hara out, into a quick saito suplex. Cover... 1... 2... No. Rear chinlock applied by BOSS. It doesn't stay applied for long though, as O'Hara bridges up and connects with a Jawbreaker! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Hitting the ropes, O'Hara goes for a spinning front kick but misses the mark. Simon avoids the kick and lays in wait for J-OH, catching him turning around with a Single Feature Flapjack! Quick cover again by Simon... 1... 2... Kickout. Still nursing his jaw, O'Hara is pulled to his feet. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" A knifedge chop rocks Jamie back on his heels and Simon turns to the outside, informing Molly that we're "going for a re-take". Unfortunately though, the single feature does not become a double. Simon is caught with his head down, kicked in the shoulder blade. O'Hara then turns for the ropes again... and is pulled down by the back of his vest top. COLE Not quick enough on that occassion. Simon stands over O'Hara and "rolls cameras", distracting him as O'Hara suddenly kips-up. Backflipping, O'Hara hooks his feet around Simon's head and tucks forward, pulling him over with a headscissors! COLE Spoke too soon! COACH That can go on the cutting-room floor. Totally irrelevant to the plot. Staggering to his feet, Singleton is clearly unsure of where he is as he reaches out looking for a tag from the non-existant Ned Blanchard. Instead he gets tagged by the boot of O'Hara, as he connects with a standing spinning heel kick! Simon wobbles but stays on his feet, until J-OH hops up onto his shoulders and pulls him over with a Victory Roll... 1... 2... Kickout! O'Hara rolls back, right by the ropes. He pulls himself through to the apron and with a cry of "LEMME HEAR YA BIRMINGHAM", he leaps to the top with a Springbo... NO! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Cutting O'Hara off, Simon manages to lunge himself at the top rope at the precise moment O'Hara's feet rested on them. O'Hara ends up falling stomach first across the top rope and there he stays. With the wind knocked out of him, O'Hara is then powerless to react as Singleton hooks the head and lifts Jamie off the ropes, pulling a page out of his tag team partner's playbook with a Slingshot Suplex!! COACH An ode to Ned! Simon turns over and hooks up both legs to stack Jamie up... 1... 2... NO! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" COLE O'Hara staying in this one! COACH For now. Just a suspicion of doubt for the audience before the hero ultimately triumphs in the end, classic filmmaking. COLE So, in your mind, Simon Singleton is the hero!? Good lord. Molly gets on the referee's case while Simon gives the signal for the end. He drags O'Hara to his feet, scooping and slamming him in the centre of the ring. Simon then exits the ring and heads up top to the sounds of thousands of Birmingham locals encouraging O'Hara to get out of the way. "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" Reaching the top, Singleton waits until he's perfectly in shot and gets the thumbs up from Molly before he takes off to bring down the Clapboard... ...NOBODY HOME!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" COLE Misses the legdrop! Jarred from the impact of the landing, Simon hobbles forward into a sweep of the legs from O'Hara. Leaping over the body, O'Hara hits a quick Standing Moonsault. 1... 2... No! Jamie jumps right back to his feet, following up with a Standing 450 Splash and hooking the leg... 1... 2... NO! COLE Momentum is building here, O'Hara needs one good connection on an aerial move. Exiting to the apron again, O'Hara waves Simon back to his feet. The Video Voyeur walks right into his path this time, the hometown boy springboarding to the top and wiping Singleton out with a Springboard Somersault Seated Senton! He's unable to stay on for the cover though, so heads across the ring and waits on Singleton to get back up again. COLE O'Hara is setting Singleton up for something. COACH Great work Sherlock. Simon pulls himself back up and is warned by Molly of what awaits him. Whether he hears her or not isn't clear, as he stumbles towards O'Hara, charging in and throwing a Busaiku knee... NO! Sidestepping, Simon catches O'Hara in a waistlock and throws him overhead with a German... ...but O'Hara LANDS ON HIS FEET! COLE What agility! After a quick realisation all is not well, Simon turns around and gets wiped out with the Busaiku Knee Kick! "YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Singleton flops to the canvas and O'Hara quickly exits to the ring apron. The Birmingham fans erupt as O'Hara heads to the top, despite the attempts from Molly Nerdly to wave him off. The Birmingham Bad Boy makes it to the top and sets himself, Simon in perfect position, as O'Hara comes tumbling down... *WHAM!* "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE BLAZE OUT 630!! 1... 2... 3!!! *DINGDINGDING!* BUFFER Your winner of the match... "THE BIRMINGHAM BAD BOY" JJJAAAAAAAMMMIIIIIIEEEEE OOO'HHHHHAAAAAARRRRRRAAAAAAAA!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Rolling right out of the ring, O'Hara hops the barricade to celebrate the win with his people, footage which Molly clearly doesn't feel is important as she turns the Siclopse away. COLE Jamie O'Hara returns home with a big win. And this crowd couldn't be happier! COACH Oh and I'm sure AngleSault is delighted too. You can't tell me this wasn't set up to spite The Enterprise. You can't tell me this doesn't prove everything Mister Moneymaker has said has been right. COLE All I can tell you is the hometown boy done good here in Birmingham! COACH Ugh! O'Hara continues to celebrate in the crowd as we fade away. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
