Tony149 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2008 (edited) Rushed to get this done so I'd have more time to write my matches for the GAB, so Patty Rule in effect. Up in the ring waiting for his cue is the man who steals money on a weekly basis, ring announcer Michael Buffer. Next to him a short, stocky individual in wrestling tights. BUFFER The following contest, one fall, 10 minute time limit. Introducing first, already in the ring, hailing from Mobile, Alabama, a man who stands no chance in our next match…DENNIS HUCKLEBERRY! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!” Referee Nick Patrick does all he can to keep an irate Dennis Huckleberry from going after Buffer for his candid comment. As he does so, “Thriller” by Fall Out Boy hits and out comes Baron Windels to a thunderous ovation. BUFFER And his opponent, making his return to the ring, from San Antonio, Texas, weighing 265 pounds… “THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGER” BARON WINDELS!!! "YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" The consummate baby face, Baron is all smiles and full of high-fives, but awaiting him ringside…MALAYSIA NERDLY. COLE Where did she come here?! More importantly, what is she doing out here? No words are spoken as the two come face to face. Hands in the air Baron attempts to go around the OAOAST Women’s Champion, who REFUSES to let him pass. BARON Now you listen here, missy. You got until the count of 3 to get on your way or else. Arms folded, whip in hand, Malaysia shakes her head NO. COACH If Baron values his personal welfare then he won’t dare lay a hand on Malaysia. Despite her defiance Baron still gives Malaysia till the count of 3 to move. When she doesn’t the shit’s on. But WAIT. Coming up the rear, MR. DICK. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!” Baron spots him in time and ducks a roundhouse, and then opens fire on his former tag partner! "YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Jock and Baron not bothering to wait until Sunday night. We’re getting a taste of the Great Angle Bash live tonight. Soundly handling The Dick, Baron’s LASHED across the back by Malaysia’s CAT O’NINE TAILS! BARON :angry: MALAYSIA :o Amazingly, the OAOAST Women’s Champ backs down. NO, it’s only a ploy to distract Baron long enough for MR. DICK TO SWOOP IN AND DELIVER A BULLDOG ON THE ARENA FLOOR!!! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!” COACH You were right, Mikey. This is a taste of what’s to come at the Great Angle Bash. OAOAST officials swarm ringside. Meanwhile, enjoying himself inside is Dennis Huckleberry, glad to have been spared the ass-kicking he was sure to receive. Jock notices this and, as the Huckster plays to the crowd, sneaks up and drives Huckleberry into the mat with PURE PENETRATION! COLE Jock Mulligan being a dick as usual. And fans, while Baron receives aid, standing by right now our broadcast colleague Tony Brannigan. COACH With some VIPs I hear. We cut to our lavish backstage interview position, once described by Patty IIRC, where TB is joined by his cousin THEODORE MONEYMAKER and the rest of THE ENTERPRISE. MONEYMAKER :lol: BRANNIGAN Theodore Moneymaker, what are you laughing at? Tell me you didn’t find any humor in what just took place? MONEYMAKER I’m simply amused by the mere coincidence those who have spoken out against my Enterprise have all found themselves down and out. BRANNIGAN Knowing you it’s probably more than coincidental. CPA :angry: MONEYMAKER Easy, big guy. He’s family. Confused as he is. But I suggest you watch it, cousin. I’ve already gotten rid of one relic around here and I wouldn’t be opposed to doing it again. Brannigan and Moneymaker look each other dead in the eye. Tensions high. A true professional, Tony carries on with the interview. BRANNIGAN Let’s talk about that other relic. I’ve heard of Crash TV, but what we saw last week can only be described as… SIMON SINGLETON (smiling proud) Compelling television. BRANNIGAN …TRASH TV! SIMON :huh: BRANNIGAN Of all the low things I’ve seen in my time that was by far the lowest I’ve seen anyone stoop. CHRISTIAN WRIGHT As far as we’re concerned, Mr. Brannigan, Anglesault had it coming. Rather than go through the proper chain of command prior to cancelling Reel Talk, he went around the Board of Directors and acted unilaterally. What comes around goes around, a lesson Anglesault learned the hard way. NED BLANCHARD Besides, we took a sex offender off the streets! BRANNIGAN And another stands before me. NED My feelings. They hurt. SIMON Besides why should anyone feel sorry for him in the first place. He tried to out run the cops. Think about that for a second. Out run the cops. They're driving Hummers, Chargers, motorcycles, and he's hitting the pavement in busted out Air Max 95's. CPA Man, even OJ had the good sense to get him a Ford Bronco. SIMON Reel talk, Chris! He deserves to be fired just for that appalling lack of common sense. Grab a kids power wheels or something. MOLLY Pow-pow-power wheels! King of the road! TONY Apparently, Teddy, you've weaseled you're way into the selection process for a new boss... MACKENZIE DECENZO Weaseling? Please. He was happy just to finally expose Anglesault for the sickening creature we always knew him to be, and fade quietly into the background. The company practically dropped down to their knees and pleaded with him to save him from their incompetence. MONEYMAKER The woman speaks the truth. That's why she's my model employee. MOLLY That's terribly surprising! You've tried to fire her no less than four times. MACKENZIE :angry: MONEYMAKER Shush, intern! Cousin, if you're angling for a scoop on who will be the next president, don't waste your attention on words that will never come. Though the introduction of a new president will come at Great Angle Bash, no decision has yet been made. I, however, have my chosen candidate, who I feel is best equipped to correct the course of the OAOAST ship and steer it into the great beyond. This will be a person I will be proud to call boss, and even prouder to call friend. And I will not let the board of director's repeat the folly they made with Anglesault. TONY Is there anything else you'd like to add? MONEYMAKER For those who held Anglesault on a pedestal, take heed. Mess with the Enterprise and we'll return in kind, with interest! And please allow me to offer thanks to the many who have seen the just in my cause, and have blessed me with their unwavering support, your loyalty will be rewarded in due time. Moving on to other matters, A couple guys making noise right now are MARV and MEL, Molly's lunkheaded elder brother's the Christ Air Express, who dared challenged my Enterprise through their sister’s MySpace page. The Enterprise all laugh, minus CPA because he’s a cool motherfucker. SIMON That’s an epic fail. Even I feel embarrassed for them. MONEYMAKER I first thought maybe one of their loser fans hacked her page, but no, those knuckleheads did indeed co-write a review of this month's High Times magazine and link to numerous legalize marijuana web sites. Well if it’s a fight they want, it’s a fight they’re going to get. NED You heard it hear first, Mean-- err, “Tough” Tony. Can I call you “Tough” Tony? Ah, hell son, I’m gonna call you “Tough” Tony anyway. (clears throat) Sunday at the Great Angle Bash, “Tough Tony”, the stoners will be stoned! BRANNIGAN So it’ll be the CAE vs. Beverly Hills Blonds at the Great Angle Bash? MONEYMAKER Possibly. BRANNIGAN What do you mean possibly? CHRISTIAN WRIGHT I remind you, the challenge was issued to ANY combination of the Enterprise. Therefore it could very well be the Beverly Hills Blonds who represent us, or perhaps myself and Theodore. NED BLANCHARD Hell son, who knows? It might even be CPA and Mackie. BRANNIGAN M-Mackenzie and CPA?! You’ve got to be pulling my leg, Blanchard. Is that a real possibility, Mackenzie? MACKENZIE Tony, honey, as we’ve said all along, there’s no combination the Christ Air Express can beat. We’re smarter, sexier, and richer. In short, we’re better than them. SIMON Now that I think about it, I kinda hope Ned and I are the ones chosen for the match. It’d allow us to release our pent up frustrations after the hottest talk show in all the land was canned a couple weeks ago. * sniff * sniff * Ned and Mackie console Simon. It was his creation after all. MONEYMAKER Just like Obama keeps running from Senator McCain's request to go across the country debating the issues, Anglesault thought he could do the same here and we saw where that led him…straight out of a job! The next GM ought to keep that in mind. But I know we’ll be greeted as liberators no matter who’s selected. BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Fade to… Edited June 25, 2008 by Patty O'Green Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
