Toxxic 0 Report post Posted July 12, 2008 Somewhere on the beach in Puerto Rico "Hey!" Megan Skye beams, positively glowing in her bikini and sipping from a pina colada. Her jaunty attitude diminishes somewhat as she catches sight of the Stephens siblings standing under a palm tree sweating their pasty skins off and looking completely miserable. "Uh... what's the matter guys?" "We're from Nottingham," Toxxic grumps, fanning himself with what was probably once semi-important SWF-related paperwork but which has now been pressed into rather more urgent service, "I'm used to rain. And mist. I burn in about 25 seconds flat, and I don't know what I was thinking when I suggested this tour." "And I can't find a decent beer in the whole fuckin' island, innit," Amy Stephens adds, the weather having led her to minimise her wardrobe to the extent that were she to turn around suddenly bystanders might have to duck to avoid her impressive cleavage making a bid for freedom. "Look on the bright side," Megan suggests, "business is on the up at last! We're raking in money from the tour, even if you take into account the travel and accommodation costs, and these new arrivals from the DVS are complimenting the roster nicely." "Yeah, about that," Toxxic says hesitantly. "Er... what's Landon's opinion on this?" "He gave me a thumbs up, then went back to playing World Soccer Manager," Megan replies, looking blank for a second, "why?" "Well, it's just that Our Super Sweet Sixteen" Toxxic manages to get the show name out without wincing too much "is starting to look like Our Sweet Supercard of Sixteen Matches. And since I OK'd it with Taiga, I was wondering how Landon felt about it all. I mean, there are quite a lot of them..." "If he gets uppity just remind him he was too drunk to make any decisions at the time," Megan shrugs. "Anyway, what's wrong with having loads more people on the card?" "For one thing, the names," Toxxic grimaces. "I mean, we've got someone calling himself Hardcore Jammer. What? Does he make extreme preserves, like... napalm marmalade, or something? Does he disrupt radio signals whilst listening to Black Flag? Does he disrupt radio broadcasts of Black Flag? Does he have impromptu music sessions with his mates atop a pile of crushed rock? What?" "I... think you're worrying too much," Megan Skye says, looking at Toxxic oddly. "And Spyke?" the Straight-Edge Sensation continues, "we've now got Spike with an 'i' and Spyke with a 'y', which is going to confuse everyone, especially Landon. And God knows what sort of team name he'll come up with if he can ever find an excuse to make them tag." "Mike?" Amy says. "Yeah?" "Shut it," his sister informs him, before turning to Megan. "He gets a bit like this sometimes," the younger Stephens informs her conspiratorially, "it's the heat, innit." "Look, I'm sure it'll go fine," Megan assures the General Manager. "We're in Puerto Rico, a big wrestling market, we've got a stacked card including a huge grudge match between a former World Champion and a home-grown talent, the place is sold out and we've got a load of new arrivals to push for the Jamaica show. What could possibly go wrong?" It's at this point, purely coincidentally no doubt, that Toxxic's mobile rings. The Englishman waves a black-nailed finger at Megan in a 'hold that thought' gesture and answers. "Hey." Toxxic winces and removes the phone from his ear slightly, then holds it a few inches away while swivelling his eyes towards it as though looking at the offending gadget will make what's coming out of it more pleasant. "Say what now?" Whoever is on the other end starts shouting louder. "No, I can hear you fine, Va'aiga, I just can't make out what you're actually saying. Slow down and speak clearly. Pretend you're an Englishman in Spain." Toxxic's eyes widen over the next few seconds. "He did what? Look, I-" he breaks off and looks at the phone with sudden suspicion, then clamps it back to his ear. "Was that one of our doors?" the General Manager demands. "Hello? HELLO!" He takes the phone away from his ear again, looks at it in disgust, then flips it shut and jams it in his pocket. "Shit," he adds as an afterthought. "Hey! Whas'appenin?" Amy demands as her brother turns away and starts striding up the beach. The two women look at each other for a moment, then break into a trot. They pull level with Toxxic just as he kicks a stray can with considerable venom. "Bloody foreigners..." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rawknight 0 Report post Posted July 12, 2008 Va'aiga: How come people don't understand me on the phone? Va'a: You don't even tok with your accent no more, ow! Va'aiga: I don't fucking swear that much Va'a: Not even, ow! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toxxic 0 Report post Posted July 12, 2008 Repeat after me: This Is Not Bro Town. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rawknight 0 Report post Posted July 12, 2008 Repeat after me: This Is Not Bro Town. This Is Not Even Bro Town Ow Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toxxic 0 Report post Posted July 12, 2008 *hits Va'aiga with a guitar* *pauses* *does Jeff Jarrett strut* *runs* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Longdogger_Pete 0 Report post Posted July 13, 2008 *scoop slam* DAMN. I'm about ten years too late. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rawknight 0 Report post Posted July 13, 2008 *scoop slam* DAMN. I'm about ten years too late. unless this thread ends up being the start of the SWFWF Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
