HD: Enterprise vs. Cucaracha challenge

[King Cucaracha 0]

MADDIX
....so then, the guy says "That's all well and good... but I said ping-pong balls, not King Kong's balls!" Hehe!

We find the members of Cucaracha Internacional in the ring as we return to HeldDOWN~! and Landon finds that we're back via a cue from the floor amongst the silence of a dying joke.

MADDIX
Oh, hey, we're back!

COLE
And not a moment too soon.

MADDIX
Alright, let's get this show on the road already. Moneymaker, come on down and let's see who the true dominant force in the OAOAST really is... at least until next week when I prove it's Cucaracha Internacional, that is.

"Sympathy For The Devil" beings to play and Theodore Moneymaker leads out his troops as requested. Interestingly, all the members of The Enterprise are clad in their wrestling attire, just as Cucaracha Internacional's members are, neither group wanting to give anything away. Moneymaker, in his white smoking jacket, smirks in his typical self-satisfaction with Christian Wright by his side, The Beverly Hills Blonds and Molly Nerdly behind him, then the new team of CPA and Bosley. Landon smirks right back in the same manner, backed by Black, Blonde and Faqu as well as Todd Cortez who could care less from the look on his face.

COLE
The OAOAST's very own faction pissing contest is set to heat up a touch, before the big Money In The Bank Tournament first round match between Landon Maddix and Christian Wright. That'll be next week, live in Central Park and we want to remind all our fans in the New York area, admission to the Big Apple Spectacular, absolutely free! I wonder what Mister Moneymaker would make of that marketing strategy.

COACH
Mister Moneymaker is one of the most generous men Ned Blanchard has ever described to me. I wouldn't be surprised if it was his suggestion in the first place!

COLE
I doubt that somehow.

The Enterprise enter the ring, filling the ring with humanity and enough arrogance to populate France, or at least a considerable part of it. The two leaders manage to make sure their men keep the peace for now though, coming face to face across the battle line.

MONEYMAKER
Alright Landon, let's see what you've got shall we?

MADDIX
You're looking at what I've got. And truthfully, I'm much more content on this side of the ring than I would be on yours. I'm sure if a fight broke out right now, you guys would do better at documenting it on camera or through flowery poetry, but other than that I don't fancy your odds much. Maybe it's just the way the light is shining off of my guys' 6-Man Tag Team Titles and onto you, I don't know.

Blonde demonstrates with his title, frustrating Simon Singleton who complains about the lens flare he's causing.

MADDIX
You know how it goes Moneymaker. A group is only as good as it's leader and this group behind me have one hell of a leader, if I do say so myself. If you don't believe me, I'll be happy to ask again when you're signing off on that $500,000 cheque with my name on it after AngleSlam. Or maybe when I cash in the contract that goes with it and win the OAOAST World Title again. Or if you can't wait that long, maybe we can make it next week once I send your sole Money In The Bank representative crashing out of the tournament?

Taking a step forward, Wright looks ready to say something about that. Moneymaker holds out a hand and encourages his right hand man to settle down though.

MADDIX
Then again, why save till next week what can happen tonight?

MONEYMAKER
Is that so?

MADDIX
Fact is, I'm a former World Heavyweight Champion in two companies. That's credential, not potential. Face it, I'm head and shoulders above you and any of your cronies. I'm one hundred percent confident that I can beat any member of The Enterprise. Infact, you can take it to the BANK!

MONEYMAKER
Well, I'm glad to hear you're feeling confident Landon. Because my choice to represent The Enterprise against you tonight... will be my personal director of security, CPA! BWAHAHAHA!

The mammoth CPA enters the ring with a face like thunder and takes a step towards Landon that leaves him towering over La Cucaracha. Landon looks up at the 6'6" former pro-boxer, trying to hide the panic on his face as he takes some defensive steps backwards.

MADDIX
I'm... I'm sorry, there's... been a misunder... I mean, you didn't let me finish. Heh. See, [i]as I was saying[/i], I'm one hundred percent confident that I can beat any member of The Enterprise. [i]But[/i], considering I'm supposed to be wrestling your number two next week I don't think it'd be right for me to compete tonight which is why I chose Todd Cortez to represent me tonight. So, yeah, good luck and all that.

Not a moment too soon for his liking, Landon bails out of the ring and points Cortez into the ring.

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

COLE
You've got to be kidding me!

COACH
What? I know Cortez is no great shakes, but...

COLE
There's no doubt in my mind that Landon was going to compete tonight until he realised he was going to end up fighting CPA! And at that point, he immediately fed Todd Cortez to the wolves! Or wolf, at least. You really think he'd have Cortez representing him under any other circumstances, after all he's done to put him down and demean him since War Games?

COACH
Well like I say, I know Cortez is no great shakes. But I'm sure Landon has a plan.

COLE
Yeah, a plan on how to save himself from a beating.

Under the pressure of his Cucaracha Internacional team-mates, Cortez shakes his head disbelievingly at them all and enters the ring. Moneymaker smirks and pats his Director Of Security on the back before he leads the rest of his Enterprise out to ringside.

COLE
Well Cortez definately has no desires to stand up for Cucaracha Internacional, but he's also not one to back down from a fight.

With seven of The Enterprise stood around one corner of the ring and five of Cucaracha Internacional around the opposite, referee Mike Chioda is well justified in going to each group and issuing specific warning that anyone interfering in the match will be thrown out. Once he's made that clear, he then checks over CPA and Cortez, who gets some unwanted coaching from Landon.


*DINGDINGDING!*

Despite being out-sized, Cortez squares up to CPA and words are exchanged before CPA cracks his fists together and the two start to circle.

"COR - TEZ!"
"COR - TEZ!"
"COR - TEZ!"
"COR - TEZ!"

MADDIX
(shouting across the ring)
HEAR THAT MONEYMAKER? THESE PEOPLE LOVE US!

CPA and Cortez look set for a boxing match rather than a wrestling match as they move back in, both with guards up. CPA's looks the safer, the former pro-boxer throwing a shadow right as a warning shot. Not intimidated, Cortez stays on his toes and almost catches CPA with a kick to the thigh.

COLE
Two great fighters here and this could resemble more of a fight than anything.

COACH
Whoever thinks MMA and OAOAST make a good match should give Axel a call, see how that went for him.

COLE
Yikes!

Not impressed, CPA raises an eyebrow, as if to say 'you really think your kicks are gonna hurt me?' Cortez takes his chance and delivers on a kick to the back of the knee. And CPA soon starts to rethink his eyebrow motions, as it does infact hurt him. Cortez delivers a second kick to the leg. And a third. And a fourth, trying to chop the big tree down. CPA swings with a right hand to try and fight Todd off, but he ducks and fires away with another leg kick. Hobbled a little, CPA leans against the ropes and tries to shake away the stinging sensation, reaching out as Cortez steps towards him and throttling him with one hand!

"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE!"
"FO..."

Releasing the choke, CPA once again shakes at his knee while Cortez stands doubled over wheezing for breath. CPA buys himself some more time by pitching Cortez through the ropes and to the arena floor, right beside Landon who pesters his understudy to get back in and fight.

COLE
Can you believe the audacity of Landon Maddix? Unbelievable.

Casting a glare towards his 'boss' as he climbs to the apron, Cortez manages to avoid CPA's grasp this time as he leans through the ropes with a shoulder thrust. Cortez then goes up and over the top, looking for a sunset flip...


1...




2...




No!

Back up quickest, Cortez strikes at the legs against with his hard-hitting kicks. Moneymaker barks instructions to his Director Of Security, determined not to lose face to Landon who grins arrogantly at him from across the ring, barely watching the action. With CPA hobbled Cortez turns and hits the ropes, charging back with a clothesline. CPA absorbs the impact though, only taking one backwards step. CPA then charges forward with his own clothesline attempt. Sidestepping, Todd is able to take Allen down to the mat with a drop toehold however, then pops up to apply an Anklelock!

COLE
Cortez using that speed and manouverability to keep CPA off-balance and now, submission hold applied, the anklelock!

COACH
You're really reaching if you're looking to get a submission on CPA. He's as tough as they come.

COLE
Maybe not quite so tough with one broken ankle though.

Cortez doesn't get quite that far yet. Rolling over onto his back, CPA places his free foot in Cortez's chest and pushes him off, sending him back-first into the turnbuckles. Hobbling back up, the bigman looks to further add to Todd's misery with an avalanche in the corner. But Cortez sidesteps and CPA hits the turnbuckles hard. Schoolboy roll-up from Todd...


1...




2...




No!

Grabbing a front facelock, Cortez tries to control CPA for a second.

COACH
Cortez better step his game real quick, because Landon doesn't look impressed.

COLE
I somehow doubt Cortez cares about impressing Landon.

COACH
He'd better soon start caring if he wants any sort of a career around here! His fate is in that man's hands. He'd be wise not to keep biting them hands, because they're the only things feeding him.

The facelock slows CPA down a little, but doesn't prevent him from climbing back to his feet and lifting Cortez up off the mat. Cortez is able to get his feet back safely on the mat before anything bad can happen though. Out of the front facelock, he manoeuveres his way behind and into a sleeper hold. But CPA uses his power again and backs Cortez into the turnbuckles. And a second time. Hoisting Cortez up onto his back, CPA then grabs hold of the head and drags Todd right over his shoulder into a harsh landing on the ring canvas.

COLE
Not everything CPA does in that ring is particularly pretty. But it's absolutely effective.

With Cortez down, CPA backs off the ropes and goes high with an elbowdrop... into nothing but that ring canvas!

COLE
Well, except that.

Far from being impressed with his understudy's heart and resiliance, Landon yells at Todd to "do something already!" as he gets back to his feet. Cortez glares at his stable'mates' again before looking to do just that. Hitting the ropes, The Urban Legend charges back, but CPA recovers to scoop him off his feet with a Front Spinebuster!! Cover...


1...





2...




No!

Moneymaker gets on Chioda's case about the count, echoed by his Enterprise co-horts.

COLE
Cortez got a little distracted by the constant abuse he's getting from his corner and can you blame him really?

COACH
That was clearly three. Where's an OAOAST ref who doesn't choke under big pressure when you need him? This ref, another loser who needs to step his game, before his duties get taken up by a referee who can actually do his job.

COLE
You mean like Clem?

CPA picks Cortez slowly back off the mat, the pace now a little more friendly to his style. He shoves Cortez back into a corner, adopting the stance before using Todd's torso as a punching bag for his heavy bodyshots. Lefts and rights bounce off of Cortez's ribcage before Chioda has had enough and reaches five, warning CPA of a disqualification. CPA gives him a look to shut him up, lifting Cortez up from his knees and delivering a big haymaker against the buckles! Cortez drops like a sack of potatoes as Chioda issues another warning to CPA about the closed fists.

COACH
Ho-ho! What a right hand!

With Cortez facedown and out, CPA is showered with congratulations from the rest of The Enterprise. Simon and Ned giggle like little schoolboys as they watch the instant replay, courtesy of The Siclopse's playback feature. Across the ring, Landon and the rest of Cucaracha Internacional are much more solemn. Finally, CPA makes a cover...


1...





2...




Foot on the ropes!

CPA grunts, hooking up the leg and trying again...


1...





2...




No!

COLE
Cortez kicking out but that big right from the ex-pro-boxer really scrambled his brains.

Looking annoyed, CPA picks Cortez up and elevates him over his shoulder, backing into a corner ready for a running powerslam. The running is no problem, but the powerslam never comes, as Cortez slides down the shoulder and escapes out the back. Hooking him up, Cortez takes CPA down with a quick russian legsweep. Rolling through to his feet The Urban Legend almost loses his balance, but gets his bearings for the follow-up legdrop.

COLE
There you see Cortez still seeing stars, but able to turn the tide nonetheless.

COACH
He should be used to be seeing stars, hanging around with Cucaracha Internacional for so long.

COLE
That is weak. Even for you. Shamed.

Both CPA and Cortez get back to their feet, Cortez having taken a few extra seconds to get his head straight. Cortez strikes first, back after the knee with a kick. And another. The noise levels increase from the outside, The Enterprise encouraging on CPA to fire back with an uppercut to the breadbasket, Cucaracha Internacional yelling at Cortez as he fires off two more kicks to the back of the legs.

COLE
Maddix and Moneymaker, both hunched over the apron, looking rather nervous now. Neither of these two giant egos want to face seeing their group's representative lose tonight, not even with round two to come next week at the Big Apple Spectacular!

Cortez has CPA hobbled up and tries to hook him up for an irish whip, only to get flung into the ropes himself. As Cortez rebounds back he manages to duck a clothesline, waiting for CPA to turn around to catch him with a Crotch-Droppah! Taking a quick jump back, Cortez then aims for the head with a Roundhouse Kick... BLOCKED! CPA gets his forearms up in the way and catches Todd while he's still off balance with a thudding one-two combo to the stomach! From the outside, Moneymaker calls out for the finish and waves CPA towards the ropes. Not one to neglect an order, CPA follows his boss's advice and charges off the ropes. As he charges back though, Cortez suddenly recovers and goes darting the other way. Both men come off adjacent ropes and look to be on a collision course, CPA letting out a roar of effort as he throws out with his Gigaton Punch... connecting with Cortez as he lunges towards him with the HOLLOW POINT~!~!

"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

Hands get thrown on heads and up bodies jump in each camp, as both men stay down after their head-on collision.

COLE
Like a jacknife on I-95! Both men collide and I've no idea who got the best of that hellacious impact!

COACH
I don't think anybody did Michael, they hit each other at the same time, we might be looking at a double knockout!

With both men down, Moneymaker and Maddix both look confused about what actually happened and why their representative isn't getting back to their feet.

COLE
CPA threw that Gigaton Punch but Cortez dove right into it with the Hollow Point. I think Cortez may just have drove his shoulder into the arm before that fist could connect 100% as CPA intended, but I don't know.

Looking a little worried at Cortez's lack of movement, Landon starts to pace around on the floor. Moneymaker looks a little nervous as well and suddenly makes a call to action. Mackenzie immediately jumps to the apron to distract the referee...



...which is all the opening that [i]Landon[/i] needs to slide a pair of brass knuckles in to Cortez!

COACH
HEY!

COLE
Hey is right, everybody's suddenly said to hell with the rules!

Suddenly Mackie has reason to complain to Chioda which leaves her stranded on the apron. Meanwhile in the ring though, Cortez finds the knucks near his hand... and promptly tosses them back out of the ring towards where they came from.

COACH
What is this moron doing?

COLE
He doesn't want to get involved in all of this garbage. But it looks like he's the only one!

Just as the knucks come flying out of the ring, The Enterprise come flying around it to confront Cucaracha Internacional about their attempts to cheat. Landon and co. fire back by pointing out Mackenzie... who comes crashing off the apron, courtesy of Megan Skye! Megan lays Mackenzie out with a big slap, but gets blindsighted by Molly Nerdly who tackles her to the ground. And that's all the encouragement the guys need to start doing battle as well!! The Nashville crowd lap it up as the two hated forces brawl away on the floor. Moneymaker goes at it with Blonde, Black brawls with Bosley, Faqu is pounded by both Beverly Hills Blonds and the Big Apple Spectacular opponents Landon and CW get acquainted a week early!

COLE
It's breaking down between The Enterprise and Cucaracha Internacional! And this crowd is loving it!

COACH
They're all cheering for their favourites!

COLE
Yeah keep dreaming.

As the brawl continues on the floor, Todd Cortez picks himself up and starts to go outside to get involved. But he stops midway through the ropes, looking at Landon holding CW in a tenuous headlock and waving for Todd's help, before throwing up his hands at the whole thing. Instead, Cortez goes back to the action... and EATS A BIG BOOT TO THE FACE!!!

"OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
Oh, CPA blindsighted him!

CPA wastes no time in following up, pulling Cortez to all fours and applying a gutwrench. With a scowl on his face he then takes The Urban Legend up over his shoulder, angling him down to the canvas and DRIVING him down with the Dominator!! With no-one on the floor paying attention to the ring, CPA then turns Cortez over and covers...


1...






2...






3!!!

COLE
And The Enterprise are gonna win this!

*DINGDINGDING!*

The mass brawl continues unabated on the floor, while CPA's hand is raised in victory.

BUFFER
Your winner of the match... CHRISTOPHER PATRICK AAAALLLLLLEEEEEEEENN!!!

CPA leaves the ring to join in the fight, but gets there a little too late as referees and officials start to pile out from the back to seperate the warring factions. The Cucaracha Internacional members are able to get away under Landon's encouragement and head for the back, Landon realising what's happened as Moneymaker starts to gloat. Casting a disgusted look at Cortez in the ring Landon vows things will be different in a week's time, from behind a sea of bodies of course. Moneymaker meanwhile laughs it up and makes the "money fingers" while patting CPA on the back.

COLE
The Enterprise win the first battle here tonight and it's thanks to an assist from Landon Maddix, accidentaly distracting Todd Cortez by calling for his help. You know, it's amazing how much Landon values Cortez when it's useful for him, isn't it?

COACH
I doubt he values him much now. Cortez dropped the ball yet again.

COLE
He wasn't even expecting to wrestle tonight until Landon bailed at the last minute. And then he got blindsighted by a boot he didn't see coming!

Cucaracha Internacional continue to be guided backstage, belatedly joined by Megan who apparantly nobody thought to help with her two on one predicament. And nobody comes to Cortez's aid as he sits up in the ring, nursing his head from the big boot.

COLE
But whatever way you look at it, The Enterprise pick up the win over Cucaracha Internacional. And what omens does that cast over the meeting between Landon Maddix and Christian Wright next week in Central Park, in the Money In The Bank Tournament?

COACH
I don't know how much it's gonna be a factor. Teddy and The Enterprise have the bragging rights, but they didn't beat Landon's best, they beat his worst, so I doubt he'll be too crushed about it.

The Enterprise continue to gloat over their victory at ringside as we fade away.