King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2008 "Easy lover She'll get a hold on you believe it Like no other Before you know it you'll be on your knees" The samba-ish sounds of Duran Duran's "Rio" waft through the arena and the entrance doors part for one of the grooviest self-proclaimed cats in all of the OAOAST! Rico de Janeiro swaggers out, stroking his 70s porn stache down as Lucius Soul follows him combing away at his afro. Giving a few creepy looks to the females in the crowd Rico strokes at his equally hairy chest to continue what has been a deeply disturbing HD so far. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, representing The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew. He is accompanied by his tag team partner, "SWEET" LUCIUS SOUL! Hailing from Rio de Janeiro... weighing in at two hundred, twenty five pounds... he is the undisputed "King Of The Mardi Gras"... RRRRIIIIIICCOOOOOO DDEEEEEEEE JJJJAAAAAAAANNNNEEEEIIIIIIRRRRRRROOOOOOO!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Rico attempts to give away his mardi gras beads draw no offers, except for one... uhm, 'heavy set' Alabama lady who lifts her TripleXL top up for him. COACH SSUUUUU-WEEEEE! SSUUUUU-WEEEEE! COLE Coach, please! Entering the ring, Lucius tries to pysche up his tag team partner who seems to be having trouble getting that mental image out of his head. Under Lucius' encouragement though he gets his focus back. Just in time... "OOOOOOOOIIIIIIII!" The pumping beats of "Fix Up, Look Sharp" by Dizzee Rascal pound through the arena and through the entrance doors swaggers Jamie O'Hara. The Birmingham Bad Boy jaws away at no-one or no-thing in particular as the marches down the aisle, slapping out at a few hands while he gabs away to the camera. BUFFER And the opponent! Hailing from Birmingham, England... he weighs in at one hundred and seventy pounds. This is "THE BIRMINGHAM BAD BOY"... JJJAAAAAAAMMMMMIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE... OOOOOO'HHHHHHAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAA!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE All three of these men will be involved in the big Riverwalk Invitational Battle Royal, in 10 days at AngleSlam. A chance here tonight to garner some momentum going into San Antone. COACH Well here's a guy that doesn't really need it. O'Hara won that battle royal last month at The Great Angle Bash, so he's on a roll as far as that goes. And this time, there won't be a match straight afterwards for him to choke in! O'Hara swaggers down the apron encouraging on the chanting crowd, vaulting over the top rope with the greatest of ease. Not impressed, Lucius dusts off Rico's shoulder for him and with a few more words of encouragement he drops to the floor. *DINGDINGDING!* As O'Hara pulls his attentions away from the crowd, Rico walks out of his corner removing his mardi gras beads. But instead of getting them out for safe keeping, he throws them towards O'Hara, taking his eye off the ball momentarily allowing him to get the jump on the Brit! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COACH There's a smart move! COLE That's about the only use Rico's going to get out of those beads tonight. Or any night I'd imagine. Rico clubs O'Hara down with forearms and stomps away against the ropes until referee Charles Robinson pulls him away. While in Rico's face though, the ref is blind to Lucius Soul reaching into the ring to choke O'Hara from the outside! The Alabama fans scream out but by the time the ref turns around, Lucius is casually combing at his 'fro, "just chillin'". And O'Hara is just coughin', as Rico drops a knee to the ribs. COLE Rico and Lucius will be hoping to use this kind of teamwork in that Riverwalk Invitational, but they won't be the only tag team involved. And it won't be two on one. Dragging O'Hara from the ropes, Rico drops a couple of elbows, stopping on the third to stroke the 'stache... and missing as a result! O'Hara fights back now with forearms shots to the face. Hitting the ropes, O'Hara then takes off with a flying forearm to knock Rico down. Quickly back up, Rico is bounced right back down by a second flying forearm shot. And a third time he goes down! Reeling, Rico then walks into a hurricanrana, O'Hara reaching back and securing a leg... 1... 2... No! O'Hara hits the ropes again... but this time Lucius grabs his ankle! The distraction allows Rico to attack from behind, clubbing O'Hara then folding him up with a high back suplex. COLE We're gonna see a lot of suplexes out of Brock Ausstin I'm sure, making his return to the OAOAST, who's going to stop him in the battle royal? Pulling O'Hara off the mat by his baggy vest top, Rico clubs him across the shoulder blades a couple of times, then sends him off the ropes. Back elbow puts O'Hara down, setting him up for Rico to come off the ropes with the Porno 'Stache Legdrop, holding for a pin... 1... 2... No! Rico stops O'Hara from getting to his feet by standing on the back of his neck, stroking the 'stache again. He then looks for another legdrop, this time feeling tailbone against canvas as O'Hara slides out of the way. A kick to the chest then sets Rico down, for a STANDING CORKSCREW MOONSAULT!! "YYYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" 1... 2... Kickout! Stepping outside, O'Hara heads up top. Referee Robinson is in line of view to prevent Lucius coming to his partner's rescue, watching helplessly as Jamie reaches the top and takes flight with a Missile Dropkick! Cover... 1... 2... No! COLE Jamie O'Hara, so quick, so elusive, which is going to play to his advantage at AngleSlam. COACH Not if he tries stuff like that it won't. COLE Well, there won't be much room to fly, that's for sure. Cuban Wall, Faqu, Jumbo, Deuce, plenty of big hitters looking to be the last man standing in San Antonio. O'Hara tries to load Rico up into a corner, but Rico pulls him into a boot to counter. After another clubbing shot Rico then sends him to the ropes with an irish whip. Confidently the Brazilian loads up a lariat, but telegraphs it, allowing Jamie to latch onto his arm and float right the way back around onto his feet! Caught in shock, Rico swings and misses with another lariat attempt, before getting caught with a spinning back heel kick to the mush the momentum of which sends him spilling out to the arena floor. Lucius runs over to check Rico's okay, which draws him right into the firing line. After drawing the crowd's support, O'Hara latches onto the top rope and springboards, Lucius and Rico looking up in despair as O'Hara comes tumbling down atop them with a 450 PLANCHA!!! "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" "JA - MIE!" COLE Well, he won't be doing THAT in the battle royal! But most effective here tonight! COACH They ain't seen nothing like that in Alabama since... hell, they ain't got nothin' in Alabama! Hobbling slightly, Jamie shakes it off as he rolls Rico back inside. He hangs back on the apron waiting for The King Of The Mardi Gras to recover, before springboarding again... and crashing and burning, as Rico knocks the rope away from the soles of his sneakers, catching him on the way down in a POWERSLAM! COLE WOW! COACH You live by those high-risk moves though, sooner or later you're gonna die by them too. Rico cradles Jamie up... 1... 2... NO! Signalling for the end, Rico drags O'Hara into a standing headscissors. RICO WHO WANTS A MOUSTACHE RIDE!? "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH And sure enough, they boo. No big loss, most of the women in here could [i]give[/i] moustache rides from the looks of things. Gutwrenching O'Hara, the Brit is muscled up over the shoulder by Rico... who loses him midway, allowing O'Hara to pull him down in a sunset flip... 1... 2... NO! Looking for a quick tide-turner, Rico ends up eating a back elbow instead. With Rico dazed J-OH makes for the ropes, running up the turnbuckles... and getting CROTCHED! COACH See there we go again, too many dumb risks! COLE And Rico has O'Hara in a bad spot here and it looks like he's going up as well. Unfamiliar territory for the Brazilian! Leaving his ground game Rico climbs to the second rope behind O'Hara, clubbing him a couple of times before looking to set him up. But Jamie fights back with elbows again. A succession of them, eventually sending Rico tumbling backwards off the top with a thud! Rico lands hard and seeing his chance, O'Hara quickly turns himself around on the top... and gets a DIME STORE HIGH from the top!!! COLE SHOOTING STAR LEGDROP!! Leg hooked... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING!* BUFFER Your winner of the contest... JJJAAAAMMMMIIIEEEEE OOOO'HHHHAAAARRRRRAAAAAAA!!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" No time for celebrations for The Birmingham Bad Boy though, as Lucius Soul jumps into the ring and dives into an attack! COLE Hey, come on now! As soon as the match ends, Soul is in with a sneak attack! Lucius stomps away on O'Hara despite the best efforts of referee Charles Robinson. And pretty soon Rico is up and lending his boots to the beatdown as well. The crowd jeer wildly for the show of poor sportsmanship, but are soon on their feet for the arrival of THE CHRIST AIR EXPRESS! MARV and MEL go skidding into the ring and take the right to The MGHWC, firing off right hands on Rico and Lucius respectively! Stereo irish whips are reversed, but stereo baseball slides guide them clear of danger on the rebound and stereo Dropsaults drop them! Rico and Lucius quickly bail to the floor and live to fight another day as the brothers Nerdly check O'Hara is okay. COLE MARV and MEL looking out for Jamie O'Hara here tonight. But it'll be every man for himself at AngleSlam, when they too compete in the Riverwalk Invitational Battle Royal. COACH Let me guess, he's their smoking buddy or something? COLE I believe the technical term is 'brah'. As The CAE help O'Hara to his feet and help him salute the cheers of the crowd, Lucius and Rico march off disgruntled. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
