AS: Malaysia vs. Jade

[King Cucaracha 0]

COLE
Up next at AngleSlam, the match for the Women's Championship! Our broadcast colleague Josh Matthews is standing by with the challenger right now.

Back at the AngleSlam interview set stands Matthews, with a very pre-occupied looking Jade Rodez.

MATTHEWS
Jade, we're just moments away from your shot at the Women's Title. Weeks and weeks of intensive training have gone into this match for you and this is it, it's all come down to this. Are you feeling nervous at all, having to step into the ring for a third time with Malaysia Nerdly, who you've never beaten before?

JADE
Uh... yeah, I mean... ya know, a little? Hehe.

Jade rubs her hands together frantically to get her mind on something else, eyes wide.

MATTHEWS
Stupid question I suppose. Well you're sure to have the support of the thousands in the arena, the millions watching on Pay Per View, not to mention your mother Krista...

Jade's hand rubbing gets ever more frenetic.

MATTHEWS
I'm not really helping, am I?

JADE
Not really no.

MATTHEWS
Okay, well I can see you're trying to stay focused so we'd best send it back out...

"WOAAAAAHHHHHH GIRL!!"

...you know what, I'm not even going to try and explain why Alix Maria Spezia rides into shot on the back of a white horse and calls it to a stop, with the help of a just in-shot horse trainer. I'm just not even going to attempt it. The fact is, that's what happens, okay. No explanation either for the kilt she's wearing. She just is. Deal with it.

JADE
Alix!?

ALIX
The time of reckoning is upon us young warrior! Tonight is your chance to make history, history that will be spoken upon for many a moon to come! Days yore, the good people of San Antonioshire, they will speak of a young woman who showed courage, determination and what a good Los Angeles hairdresser can do for a person! For tonight, you will be a hero! You will defy all odds! For, Malaysia, the enemy. She may well take away folicles of your hair. She may well take a number of your teeth as souvenirs. And there's a pretty good chance that given the chance she'll take your innocence too, if ya know what I mean. But, Jade, SHE WILL NEVER TAKE OUR FREEDOM!!!! Or, uh, ya know, OUR WOMEN'S TITLE!!!

JADE
Alix... where did you get that horse from!?

ALIX
Well I didn't get it from Sears, that's for sure! Infact they were quite rude when I enquired with one of their members of staff about it. So fuck you Sears! It don't matter none, son, what's important is it's inspirational! You see a hot chick riding a big ol' horse, you sit up and you take notice of what they're saying, as the rude Sears employee I chased down a narrow alleyway will attest to. Don't tell me you've never seen Braveheart?

JADE
I saw a trailer for it when I was in high school.

ALIX
Really? Wouldn't that make me quite old then? Gee I don't like that one bit.

JADE
Uh... why are... you not wearing any, uh... any underwear?

ALIX
DUH! Because I'm Scottish! Isn't that right lads?

For no reason at all (seriously, you want explanations, you're in the wrong damn place), The Last Kings Of Scotland walk by.

DANNY BOY
Aye lassie!

SCOTTISH SCOTT
Aye!

ALIX
Aye matey! Shiver me timbers and all that! See, now I get why those Scottish people in pirate movies say that. Because wearing no underwear is really making my timbers shiver something rotten right about now! I think I'm gonna go change real quick, you okay waiting here with my horse?

JADE
I've got my match.

ALIX
Oh, well, in that case maybe my below the belt nakedness'll work as a great distraction techniqu...

JADE
NO NO! Rush back and change, I can wait, really!

ALIX
Well if you insist. I mean, do you want to win this title or what? Sheesh!

Alix jumps down off of the horse and the horse trainer takes it safely away, causing Josh to almost faint.

JADE
Wouldn't it have been quicker to take the horse?

ALIX
Jade, this is a public place of work, it's no place for an inhebriated woman with no underwear to be riding a horse! Very irresponsible of you to even suggest it. Just wait until I tell your mother, she'll be so proud of you! Ooh-hoo, an up-draft!

With a big grin on her face Alix goes skipping off, leaving Jade to go back to dreading the worst about her match again.



COACH
What I wouldn't have given to have been that horse.

COLE
[i]Okay[/i], well, the Women's Title match will be coming up momentarily. While we've got a spare moment there's just time to remind you about our next Pay Per View offering on September 28th and that will be entitled Zero Hour, live from Cleveland, Ohio. Just four weeks away now, so start saving your money for that one folks. Not in a bank of course, that'd just be madness with the state of the economy in this country, just stick it all in an old sock or something.

COACH
Speaking of old socks...

COLE
There can be no good segueway out of that line, so let's just go up to the ring shall we?


*DINGDING!*

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall... and, it is for the OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP!


"Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy) 
And you don’t care what they say 
See, every time you turn around 
They screamin' your name

Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy) 
And you don’t care what they say 
See, every time you turn around 
They screamin' your name"

The lights flash purple and often as "When I Grow Up" by The Pussycat Dolls hits, bringing out a familiar group of dancers onto the stage. Within the space of a week Jade has upgraded from solo entrance to her mother's trusty dancers all wearing identical cheerleader outfits to hers and launching into a high energy routine! Jade doesn't look any the less nervous for the company and doesn't even try to match the professionals around her, just smiling and waving as the dancers do their work. One person who does join in though is Alix Maria Spezia, arriving a little later, now fully clothed to the disappointment of many I'm sure. Unfortunately she obviously got the wrong memo and is dressed as a cowgirl instead of a cheerleader. Looking confused as to why the dancers aren't dressed like her, she soon forgets all about sartorial differences and launches in with them.

COACH
Boy, that was a quick wardrobe change.

BUFFER
Introducing on her way to the ring, the challenger. Accompanied to the ring by ALIX MARIA SPEZIA! She now resides in Los Angeles, California! The second generation starlet with a heart of gold... ladies and gentlemen, she is "LITTLE MISS CALIFORNIA"... JJJJAAAAAAADDEEEEEE... RRRRROOOOODDEEEEEEZZZZZZ - DDUUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAANN!!!!!

"YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!"

"When I grow up 
I wanna be famous 
I wanna be a star 
I wanna be in movies 

When I grow up 
I wanna see the world 
Drive nice cars 
I wanna have Groupies"

Jade marches to the ring with a nervous look on her face, not in the mood for any dancing. Even more so than usual. She climbs up the ring steps and with a deep breath enters the squared circle, acknowledging the cheers and many signs wishing her good luck with a shy wave.

COACH
You know, the song says it all, "Be careful what you wish for cause you just might get it." Jade, I know Mommy chose your music for you and really it couldn't be any more inappropriate for you if she tried, but maybe you oughta take a listen and bail on out of here real quick.

COLE
Jade isn't bailing anywhere Coach. She's worked incredibly hard these past three or four weeks to prepare herself for this match, she wants to win this Women's Title more than anything, to carry on her part of the Duncan legacy.

COACH
Well that's sweet an' all, but Malaysia's not just beaten Jade twice before, she's completely and utterly squashed her both times! In five minutes or less! Maybe if Jade's spent those four weeks learning some new wrestling moves or how to take sadistic levels of punishment she might be okay this time. But from what I can tell, she's got a cheerleader outfit from a fancy dress shop, took a trip to Krista's hairdresser and played home invasion with her bestest best friends. And that's it.

COLE
She's done a lot more than that Coach. She's been learning from two of the very best, her mother and Alix Maria Spezia. Their methods might not be conventional but they're successful.

The out-of-breath Alix belatedly makes it to the ring in Jade's corner, just in time as the sound of a whip cracking starts up "Wild Side" by Motley Crue. Jade takes a big cartoonish gulp as the mighty frame of the Women's Champion, Malaysia Nerdly, forms on the entrance way. Carrying her cat o' nine tails, Malaysia smiles to herself looking down on the ring, rubbing the main plate of her Women's Title.

BUFFER
And, introducing her opponent. Hailing from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. She is the ultimate combination of beauty and beatdowns... the reigning and defending OAOAST Women's Champion... MMMMAAAAALLLAAAAYYYYYSSSIIIIIAAAAAAAA... NNEEEEERRRRRRDDLLLLLLYYYYYY!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Malaysia cracks her whip on the floor in the aisle, unnerving a good number of the fans nearby. Not to mention Jade, who looks to Alix for a little moral support and finds her mother's girlfriend cowering behind the ring steps.

COLE
That is one sick pup right there. The Women's Champion, who has absolutely dominated the women's division since she showed up at Jock Mulligan's side months ago, to the point that Jade is the only female in the OAOAST who's agreed to face her in weeks, let alone requested it herself!

Malaysia takes her sweet time climbing the ring steps, giving them a crack with the nine tails as well sending a metallic thud ringing out. From the outside, Alix points out Jade as the one who challenged her in hopes that she'll be left unharmed. Referee Charles Robinson quickly takes away the whip as Malaysia enters, taking the Women's Title belt as well and holding it overhead for the crowd. Before putting it outside he gives Jade a chance to look at it.

COLE
Here we go, can Jade finally slay the mighty Malaysia?


*DINGDINGDING!*

And with that the bell sounds. Jade looks nervous to leave her corner, as Malaysia leans back in hers with that same sick smile.

COACH
So, how long before Jade's forced to drop the Duncan name after she shames it again tonight? I give it a week to let the paperwork go through.

COLE
Why do you always have to keep bagging on Jade? She's just a sweet, simple girl from Grand Rapids, what's wrong with that?

COACH
Well, plenty if you ask Krista, else she wouldn't be doing this whole makeover thing.

Jade gets the crowd clapping to try and boost a little confidence she's lacking, before the first tentative lock-up. However Malaysia has no interest in locking up and as she strokes her hand down Jade's newly styled hair, the freaked out challenger breaks away and scurries back to her corner. Alix is quickly called into action and with a mischevious smile, she imparts some advic--

JADE
NO! Eww, oh my God, no, I'm not doing that! No!

Shrugging, Alix walks off and tells Jade "fine, do it your way, prude" leaving us to only speculate what Alix's idea could have been. Shaking it off, Jade goes tentatively back to Malaysia and this time they do lock up. Malaysia immediately muscles her opponent back into the corner and pens her in.

"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE!"
"FOUR!"
"FIVE!"

Malaysia gives a clean break, but only after having spent the five count staring into Jade's eyes and further unnerving her. Malaysia backs up and encourages Jade to come to her. And having had enough of being intimidated, Jade runs forward and smacks Malaysia across the jaw with an elbow strike!

COLE
Oh, there we go! What a shot by Jade!

COACH
And what little effect it had, look!

Wiping at her jaw Malaysia continues to smile away, nodding her head to show that she likes it, she really likes it. Jade looks confused about what to do next at seeing this and runs in, connecting with a second elbow! More head-nodding is the only response she gets though. So Jade rushes past Malaysia and comes off the ropes looking for more momentum. But Malaysia's eyes suddenly light up at the last second, and with a gleeful look as if to say 'your turn', she cuts Jade off with a devestating clothesline!!

"OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

COACH
And that's the beginning of the end. How close to the end just depends on how long Malaysia's gonna drag this out. Which could be a while, because she's having so much fun right now.

Jade holds her jaw and tries to crawl out of the ring, but is stopped by Malaysia placing her foot on her back. With Jade pinned down Malaysia then places her foot on Jade's hand and pushes up on the top rope, standing with all her body-weight on the hand causing Jade to scream in pain!

"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE!"
"FOUR!"
"FI..."

Break by Malaysia. Jade writhes around on the mat holding her hand and Malaysia takes a second to savour her moans of pain.

COACH
You think Malaysia's into cheerleaders Michael?

COLE
What sort of a question is that!?

COACH
I like to think she is. Ya know, so naive, so innocent, so unused to the pain that she adores. How horny must Malaysia be right now?

COLE
You're sick.

Malaysia drags Jade back up and holds her in a one-hand chinlock, bringing her left arm around with a crushing forearm shot to the chest. As Jade drops to her knees Malaysia's smile suddenly disappears though, as she sees Alix on the outside eagerly waving her arms. Doing her best to ignore the distraction Malaysia picks Jade up, clubbing her with another forearm. Still Alix keeps waving though and Malaysia stops for a second. Before Alix can capitalise on the distraction though, Malaysia suddenly FISHOOKS Jade and shocks Alix into (momentary) silence!

"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE!"
"FOUR!"
"FI..."

Again Malaysia breaks on five, but gets a warning from the referee. She then turns back to Alix... to find The Hollywood Bad Girl waving her cat o'nine tails at her!! Malaysia's eyebrows furrow and she goes to confront Alix, only to stop in her tracks as Alix starts to grind seductively with the whip between her teeth!

"YYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!"

Sending the San Antonio crowd into rapture isn't neccessarily tough. But Alix manages to do the tougher task, keeping Malaysia's attention transfixed on her. And it allows Jade to recover, turning around and delivering a PUNCH DOWNSTAIRS ON MALAYSIA!! The Women's Champion doubles over in shock and Jade forces her down into a roll-up...


1...




2...



KICKOUT!

COACH
Di... did she just use a lowblow!?

COLE
That might be one way to pour some cold water on Malaysia's advances. And no prizes for guessing who taught Jade the virtues of that move.

Malaysia looks angry now as she gets to her feet, even the elbow strikes of Jade not enough to make her smile about this pain. Firing four quick shots, Jade hits the ropes. This time she anticipates the wild swing of Malaysia and ducks her clothesline, coming off the far ropes and delivering a front dropkick on the run, catching Malaysia in the stomach. The force knocks Malaysia back into the ropes, Jade drawing off the cheers of the crowd as she comes charging in... getting backdropped over the top, but saved from a hard spill to the floor by Alix! Alix helps her back onto the apron, where Jade delivers an instinctive shoulder through the ropes. From there Jade looks a little lost, so Alix gives her a 'helpful' shove up over the ropes into a sunset flip...




...NO! Malaysia hangs onto the rope to block being taken down!

ALIX
Hey, referee, tell Melody to get her hand off the ropes!

MALAYSIA
I'm not Melody!

ALIX
Oh, okay Maggie... no no, wait, Mindy, right? Or is it Molly? No no, she's the chick with the camera... uh, no, don't tell me, it's on the tip of my tongue... err, Marvin? Monica? Maria? Makela? ...Abdullah!?

MALAYSIA
GRRRRR... IT'S MALAYSIAAaaaaaaa!!

Malaysia forgets where she is and falls back into the pin!


1...





2...





NO!

Jade is up quickly and latches onto Malaysia with a sleeper hold. With pure brute strength Malaysia climbs to her feet anyway though and rams Jade back into the turnbuckles!

COLE
The power of this woman is unbelievable.

COACH
Malaysia is unbelievable. Even two on one, Jade is no match for Malaysia.

Sitting Jade on the top turnbuckle, Malaysia grabs two handfuls of hair before YANKING her back down to the canvas! Jade lands with a thud and groans in pain, giving Malaysia the chance to get her bearings back. As soon as she does, she leaves Jade behind though, going to the outside in pursuit of Alix! The fans rise to their feet as Alix is ready for Malaysia, whip in hand brandished like a ninja weapon. But referee Robinson is able to get in between them before they can come to blows. Malaysia is ordered back into the ring, before Robinson takes drastic measures to get control and risks being lynched by the people of San Antonio as he THROWS ALIX OUT!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

COLE
I think the referee's had enough of Alix's distractions and this crowd doesn't like it one bit! But Alix is being sent to the back!

COACH
It's about time too. Take away Jade's safety blanket and let's see how tough she is!

Alix tries to protest, tries to reason, tries to seduce Robinson with a sultry dance with Malaysia's whip. None of them are working though and Alix is banished to the backstage area. With her best puppy-dog eyes she sulks off, leaving Jade without any guidance as Malaysia stalks towards her in the ring. With no distractions to bother her, Malaysia picks Alix up by the wrist and pulls her into a knee to the stomach. By the hair, she again throws Jade hard to the canvas. Malaysia then delivers a big legdrop and covers...


1...




2...



No!

Realising all alone, Jade shows some fight and catches Malaysia in a casual moment with a punch to the gut. And another. But Malaysia just shrugs them off and clubs Jade in the back. Malaysia then delivers a backbreaker, before stretching the challenger out across the knee.

"LET'S GO JADE!"
"LET'S GO JADE!"
"LET'S GO JADE!"
"LET'S GO JADE!"

COLE
Jade might not have Alix's moral support anymore, but she's got these thousands of San Antonians in her corner!

COACH
Oh good, maybe one of them knows a shortcut to the hospital.

Fists clenched, Jade feeds off the energy and manages to get her knee up into Malaysia's chest. A second knee catches Malaysia a little higher. And a well placed third lands on the ear, allowing Jade to escape the submission. Her freedom doesn't last long though. Malaysia grabs Jade before she can get away and drags her away from the ropes, grabbing her in a waistlock and looking for a suplex. Jade kicks her feet frantically and refuses to be taken over, managing to counter with an unorthodox looking chin breaker! Straight back up is Malaysia though and she shoulder charges Jade, right back into a corner. Jade falls to a knee and Malaysia presses her throat against the middle rope.

"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE!"
"FOUR!"

Malaysia whips Jade across the ring, charging in... and MISSING with a corner splash!

COLE
Now here's an opening! Can Jade capitalise?

Hitting the ropes, Jade launches herself with a crossbody... CAUGHT! Malaysia catches Jade with ease and sends her flying with a Fallaway Slam!!

"OOOHHHHHHHHHH!"

COACH
Well there's a surprise, she failed.

Malaysia crawls over and covers...


1...




2...




NO!

Malaysia looks surprised at the kickout, but soon consoles herself with the fact she can dish out some more pain. She pulls Jade up, lifting her over her shoulder and tries to position her in the Gory Special. Jade struggles around trying to get free... but can't and is soon being stretched in all sorts of unnatural positions!

COACH
Oh yeah, she's got her on the rack now! You know she's got a rack down in the Nerdly family basement? What do you reckon she uses that for?

COLE
I dread to think.

In immense pain Jade shouts out and brings the smile flooding back to Malaysia's face. Jade's face is etched in agony and referee Robinson is right there ready to call for the submission. But the crowd sense Jade is in trouble and increase their support again. And it seems to work. Malaysia lets Jade suffer for a few more seconds before starting to bend even further forward to apply even more pressure to the human rack. It looks like Jade is moments away from calling it quits with her spine being torqued to near breaking point. But she's doing this for Krista and something suddenly kicks in, Duncan DNA perhaps, as she lets out a loud groan... not of pain, but of exertion, fighting against the hold and arching herself back the other way!! Malaysia looks shocked and doesn't react in time to stop Jade, reversing the hold into a sunset flip pin...

COLE
COUNTER BY JADE!


1...




2...




NO!

Malaysia strikes first with a knee to cut Jade off at the pass.

COLE
And just as Jade was starting to get something going, Malaysia shuts her right back down.

COACH
Yeah, I mean, Jade's faring better than she ever has. Even I admit it's an improvement. But she's still no match for Malaysia!

With a scowl Malaysia pulls Jade up onto her shoulders. Turning away from the ropes, she then DRIVES her down with a Powerbomb and stacks her on her shoulders for the pin...

COACH
That's it.


1...





2...





KICKOUT!!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
NO! It's NOT it! This is Jade's night, this is the defining night of her young life and she's not about to go down without a fight!!

COACH
Alright, calm down dude.

Malaysia grabs Jade and calls for the end, before hoisting her up again. Up on the shoulders Jade suddenly sparks to life though, raining down punches to the head. With Malaysia dazed, Jade then pushes herself forward AND DROPS MALAYSIA WITH A DDT!!

COLE
What a move! Jade with a counter, from the jaws of possible doom from that second powerbomb!

COACH
Where did she get THAT from!?

COLE
Take a wild guess!

Both Jade and Malaysia are down and referee Robinson starts his standing ten count. The crowd are loud in trying to wake Jade up, seeing an opportunity for her. Jade stirs first to their excitement.

COLE
Come on Jade, make the cover! You can do it!

And she does!


1...





2...




NO!

"LET'S GO JADE!"
"LET'S GO JADE!"
"LET'S GO JADE!"
"LET'S GO JADE!"

Slow to their feet, Malaysia and Jade are both up at the same time. But it's Jade who's got the adrenaline rush and she strikes first, stunning Malaysia with some elbows. With all her strength she manages to whip Malaysia into a corner, before following her in with Double Knees~! Jade runs the ropes as Malaysia staggers out of the corner. The challenger ducks a clothesline and comes to a stop, catching Malaysia with the Gamengiri as she turns around!

COLE
Kick to the face, she could have it!

Cover by an eager Jade...


1...





2...




NO!

COLE
Again only two! But it seems like the longer this match goes, the more confidence Jade is feeling in herself and it's that confidence that's making all the difference, because the Women's Champion is on the ropes like we've never seen!

Firing up again the challenger watches Malaysia to her feet, then paws her with an open left hand. Then paws her with an open right. With a guttural shout, Jade then pulls a 360... NO! Malaysia cuts her off with a boot. The Women's Champion then pulls Jade in and again signals for the end.

COACH
You were saying?

COLE
Could it be that devestating piledriver of Malaysia's? If it is, it's dream over!

Malaysia elevates Jade up over her shoulder... but Jade kicks and struggles to escape down the back! Reaching back Jade tries to hook Malaysia up for a backslide. Malaysia refuses to go though and spins Jade to face her, shoving her back a step and delivering a HARD Yakuza style kick to the chest! Jade is almost turned inside out and Malaysia stacks her on her shoulders for the quick pin attempt...


1...





2...





Kickout!

COLE
Malaysia has never had this much problem putting an opponent away, she's never encountered this much resistance before. And you have to wonder if she's getting frustrated.

COACH
Probably. She's had her fun, now it's time for Jade to slink off and lick her wounds.

Stalking Jade, Malaysia charges and bowls her over with a clothesline. Jade is rolled right the way over this time and slumps sadly to the mat, on her last legs. 

MALAYSIA
OVER!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

With handfuls of hair she then pulls Jade to her knees. With Jade's hair tearing at the roots she stops and savours the strands of blonde for a couple of seconds, before looking to finally finish Jade off. Reaching down she gutwrenches Jade and muscles her back up over the shoulder.

COACH
Here it comes.

Malaysia carries Jade around and picks her spot, centre of the ring...



...but suddenly stops. In a last ditch effort to save herself Jade grabs a hold of Malaysia's hair and tugs away! Malaysia lets out a shout as it's her roots being tugged at for once, that shout soon turning into a moan of pleasure as the pain starts to sink in. But in this moment of pleasure, she finds herself distracted from the job at hand. After a few more tugs Jade starts to feel Malaysia's grip soften. And she's able to turn to her side a little.

COACH
Come on, drop her! Drop her already!

COLE
No, she's fighting it Coach, Jade is fighting it!

COACH
No, no!

Malaysia finally realises what's going on and clamps her hands back together... but by now it's too late, as Jade pushes herself off of Malaysia's shoulder, still holding onto the hair of the Women's Champion...







...AND BRINGING HER DOWN WITH A REVERSE X-FACTOR!!!!!

"YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

COACH
:O

COLE
THE MOVE! THE COVER?

Jade even looks shocked for a second, before snapping to life to capitalise, jumping on top of Malaysia and hooking the legs...


1...






2...







3!!!!

"YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

COLE
YES! YES YES, JADE DID IT, JADE WINS!!!!


*DINGDINGDING!*

In shock and elation Jade slaps her hands to her face and climbs to her feet, looking at the referee as if waiting for him to shake his head and say it was only two. But instead Robinson raises her hand in victory and Jade starts to jump for joy around the ring!

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the contest... and the NNEEEEEEEEWWWWW OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION... JJJAAAAAADDEEEE RRRROOOOOOODDEEEEEEZZZZ - DDUUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAANN!!!!

"YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
What a scene in San Antonio! A year ago Jade Rodez broke from the shackles of The Enterprise! And on this night, after a year of heartache and upheaveal, Jade has done what no other woman could do, she has beaten Malaysia Nerdly and she has won the OAOAST Women's Championship! Absolutely unbelievable! Do you believe in miracles!?

COACH
Well, I didn't, but... this is a miracle alright!

Jade is handed the Women's Championship and she clutches it in her arms, close to tears. Her celebration is cut short by Malaysia Nerdly getting to her feet, holding the back of her head and raging. She rages at no-one in particular though as Jade and the referee are quickly out of the ring and out of harm's way down the aisle. Still wide-eyed in disbelief, Jade raises the title over her head and lets out a relieved shout, cheered wildly by the crowd.

COLE
This is a fantastic moment and I'm so pleased to be a part of it. After all Jade has gone through, tonight she's done her mother Krista proud. The Duncan name is in safe hands Coach!

COACH
Yeah, yeah, whatever.

COLE
And she crammed all your taunts down your throat, didn't she?

COACH
Yeah, take it easy, okay? Nobody likes a gloater.

In her celebration Jade raises the title belt one last time to the crowd before she disappears through the curtains and gets backstage. Tired, she walks weakly. But she suddenly gets a burst of energy as she sees Krista backstage waiting for her, running over and jumping into her mother's arms in delight. Alix looks like a third wheel for a second and joins in the hug as well so as not to feel left out.

COLE
It's a Duncan family celebration at AngleSlam!

Jade, Krista and Alix's hug continues...



...as we cut away, into the locker room of The In Crowd, to see none other than LEON RODEZ watching all this on a TV monitor. With hands on hips, Leon wears a glum smile on his face as he rests a hand on the TV set watching her niece's celebration. Behind him, Zack Malibu walks by and stops with a look of concern.

ZACK
You okay man?

LEON
...huh? Yeah... yeah, I'm great. Why wouldn't I be?

Leon turns the TV set off as we go back into the arena.