HD: CI vs. J-OH, CAE

[King Cucaracha 0]

BUFFER
The following contest is set for one fall and is for the OAOAST World Six Man Tag Team Championships!!

"The Church Of Hot Addiction" by Cobra Starship hits and out march the former champions. Leading the way is Nathaniel Black, a face like thunder (although thunder is actually not visible, so therefore that is an inaccurate simile passed down through generations) as he stomps to the ring. Behind him, James Blonde fires up Faqu from underneath the hood of his trendsetting jacket.

BUFFER
Introducing first, the challengers. Total combined weight, seven hundred and fourty seven pounds. Together, they represent Cucaracha Internacional! The team of "THE TRENDSETTER" JAMES BLONDE... "THE SAMOAN WRECKING BALL" FFFFFAAAAAAAAQQQQQUUUUUUUU... and NATHANIEL BLACK... they are INTERNATIONALLY KKNNOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWNN!!!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Black paces around the ring, while Blonde and Faqu join him inside.

COLE
Blonde and Faqu have, save for the span of roughly one week, held the 6-Man Tag Team Titles since February. That one week saw they and Todd Cortez relinquish the titles, then team with Nathaniel Black to win them right back at AngleMania. Now, tonight, they look to get the titles back in quick fashion once again and placate their leader Landon Maddix in the process.

As the Internacional trio wait for their opponents, we go to the aisle and see LANDON MADDIX making his way to the ring in a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up. The crowd slowly catch on and boo The Next Generation's arrival, while James Blonde starts to lead the applause for his leader. Unfortunately he leads a band of one and gets no appreciation from Landon as he makes his way around the ring. Pulling up a chair, Landon and Megan take a seat at ringside, Landon with arms folded.

COLE
Well speak of the devil, Landon Maddix joining us at ringside.

COACH
I dunno if I like this. I mean, the pressure's on now.


.:CUE: "Like The Angel", Rise Against:.

As the energetic song hits the energy in the arena goes up as well, as out rush the brothers Nerdly. MARV and MEL whip the crowd into a frenzy as Melody Nerdly makes her way out. The twins then land a jumping high-five and Melody strikes a Chun Li Street Fighter-esque fighting stance as two pyrotechnic rockets, one blue and one orange, launch into the sky!

BUFFER
Introducing the opponents. The reigning OAOAST World 6-Man Tag Team Champions! First, from Edmonton, Alberta Canada and being accompanied to the ring by MELODY NERDLY! Total combined weight, three hundred and seventy pounds... MARV... MEL... THE CHHRRRRIIIIIIIISSSSSSSTT AAAIIIIIIRRRRRR... EEEEEXXXXXXXXPPRRRRREEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!

"YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!"

MARV and MEL hand-slap their way to the ring, neglecting to step inside until their partner arrives.

COLE
MARV and MEL picked up a big win over Landon Maddix and James Blonde last week, albeit by countout. All the momentum rides with the champions in this match

The crowd rise again, as "Witness (1 Hope)" by Roots Manuva plays Jamie O'Hara to the ring. Wearing his third of the title belts around his neck as if it were some serious bling, O'Hara psyches his laid back partners up and then mouths off to Black from the floor.

BUFFER
And their partner! From Birmingham, England... he weighs one hundred, seventy six pounds... "THE BIRMINGHAM BAD BOY"... JJJAAAAAAAAMMMMIIIIIIEEEEEEE... OOOOOOO'HHAAAAAAAARRRRRRRAAAAAAA!!!!

"YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
Two time Six Man Champion, having held the belt previously with The Global Party Exchange. God speed, wherever you are!

With Black just itching to get at his long-time adversary and Faqu just itching to get at... uh, anyone... referee Mike Chioda has trouble keeping everybody back to let the Champions into the ring. In this time, we see Landon and Megan looking on from ringside.

COLE
Landon not looking in a particularly confident mood tonight. He's seen his team lose almost as much in recent months as the Detroit Lions.

COACH
Let's not get ahead of ourselves.

After a team conference, Blonde is insistant to start. But he's outranked by Nathaniel Black and when Blonde turns to Landon looking for an over-ruling, he gets nothing, so he sadly steps to the apron. Seeing Black in the ring, O'Hara starts for the Champions. And it takes about a milisecond to boil over into a complete brawl between them!!

COLE
Uh-oh, here we go!


*DINGDINGDING!*

O'Hara and Black slug it out in the centre of the ring with the crowd behind each and every shot. Eventually the two Brits break away from each other for a second and stare each other down catching their collective breath, before engaging in battle again! Black strikes with forearms, O'Hara with closed fists, with Black seeming to gain an advantage as he lands a European uppercut. Staggering backwards, Jamie lets the ropes push him back and lands a running forearm. But Black grabs him again and nails a second European uppercut. He follows up with a hard forearm, able to get more backswing on this one, leaving Jamie dazed as he hits the ropes. But O'Hara recovers and lands a flipping dropkick on the rebounding Black.

"YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!"

As O'Hara takes his feet, Faqu storms into the ring looking to wipe him out. O'Hara manages to evade though and The Christ Air Express leap in to help ward the big Samoan off. They take the fight to Faqu, while O'Hara knocks Blonde off the apron. O'Hara then throws Black outside before waving to his partners. They play a little cat and mouse with Faqu, enfuriating him to the point that he charges, then sidestepping and letting Faqu fall prey to the lowbridge by The Birmingham Bad Boy!

COACH
I wonder what videogame they pulled that from.

COLE
Teasing the big, clumsy boss into charging and then dodging out of the way? Doesn't sound like any videogame I've ever played. But sarcasm aside, it didn't take long for this one to break down and look out here, somebody alert air traffic control!

As the challengers regroup on the outside, MARV and MEL run the ropes and DIVE INTO THE PACK WITH STEREO SOMERSAULT PLANCHAS!!

COLE
A little bit of Christ Air in Canada!

MARV and MEL quickly help set up the human bowling pins that are Cucaracha Internacional, ready as O'Hara sets himself. With The CAE keeping everyone in check, he runs the ring, then brings the crowd to their feet AS HE WIPES EVERYONE OUT WITH A SPACE FLYING TIGER DROP!!!!!

"YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
Two words... OH MY!

"JA - MIE!"
"JA - MIE!"
"JA - MIE!"
"JA - MIE!"

O'Hara tags a couple of front row hands, as we see Landon Maddix looking severely vexed from his ringside seat. Back inside go O'Hara and Black, O'Hara stomping his opponent a couple of times before pulling him back up. Two forearms stun Black, O'Hara then coming off the ropes to deliver a spinning wheel kick. The high-flying Brit follows that up with a STANDING CORKSCREW SENTON, before looking for the pin...


1...



2...



No!

Quick tag is made to MEL, who snapmares Black flat onto his back and delivers a double knee drop, bringing his 185 pounds down across the ribs! Cover...


1...



2...



No!

COLE
The fast-paced Champions riding high on, amongst other things, a wave of momentum here tonight in Toronto. And Cucaracha Internacional simply can't keep up!

COACH
Well this flipping and flying is all well and good, until one of them misses. Which they will, eventually.

COLE
Hasn't happened so far.

MEL starts to pick Black up looking to tag his brother, but Black has other ideas with a headbutt to the midsection. A knee then further softens MEL up as Black makes the tag, bringing in James Blonde. The Vancouver native gets a minimal cheer, replaced by a much bigger cheer for Edmonton's MEL and an armdrag takeover. MEL hangs on and makes the tag to MARV, who comes in off the top with an axehandle across the arm.

COLE
Quick moves, quick tags, this six man tag team combination is a real blink and you'll miss 'em affair.

COACH
You could say the same about their title reign after tonight.

Irish whip by MARV sends Blonde into a neutral corner where he suffers a running back elbow. Taking a second to play to the crowd, MARV then goes to rush out... but two handfuls of hair drag him cruelly to the canvas! Blonde grins over at Landon as he scales to the middle rope, kissing his fist and making it clear his Marty Jannetty Fistdrop is actually dedicated to La Cucaracha. So it's a shame it hits only ring mat!

COLE
Do you think James Blonde was ever hugged as a child?

As Blonde checks none of his fingers are broken, MARV surprises him by taking him over with a headscissors! MARV then collects Blonde, wringing the arm and tagging MEL back in. Grabbing the top rope, MEL launches himself in as MARV boots Blonde, doubling him up for the sunset flip...


1...



2...



No!

Another arm wring and another tag, bringing MARV straight back in. The CAE send Blonde off with a double whip and set themselves, looking for a double hiptoss... but Blonde lands on his feet and surprises them with two back elbows!

COACH
Nice!

Blonde brushes himself off, very satisfied with himself. He then hits the ropes looking for a double clothesline, but MARV and MEL catch his arms and drag him back across their knees with a double backbreaker! Off the ropes in front, they then land stereo basement dropkicks to the face of the seated Trendsetter! MARV and MEL pop back up, delivering dropkicks to Black and Faqu on the apron for good measure, while O'Hara compounds JB's misery with a RUNNING SHOOTING STAR PRESS~!!!, causing Landon's face to sink even further on the outside.

"YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!"

Referee finally gets control, in time to count MARV's pin attempt...


1...




2...




Kickout!

MARV quickly applies an armbar again to control Blonde.

COLE
The Champions are rolling here. And next Sunday night they'll be joining up with Baron Windels to take on Cucaracha Internacional again in traditional Survivor Series action. These comments from Baron, earlier tonight!


[QUOTE][COLOR=orange][i]OAOAST[/i][/COLOR]

A small square box SWOOPS~ in and settles on the upper right hand side of the picture. From earlier in the day, we see Baron and a smiling Melody standing at the HeldDOWN interview set with Josh Matthews.

MATTHEWS
Baron, last week you came to the aid of the World 6-Man Champions and now, you'll team up with them at November Reign. Your thoughts?

BARON
See, everybody wants to run with a pack in the OAOAST recently Josh. It's like gang warfare round here. Well, I'm the Lone Star Gunslinger. I don't run with no gangs. But ya know, I'm always happy to help a damsel in distress, 'specially if it's Miss Melody here. Don't matter if it's Cucaracha Internacional, Enterprise, Deadly Alliance, whatever, I'm the sheriff that's gonna run these gangs outta town.

MELODY
YIPEE-KAY-YAY!!

[COLOR=orange][i]HELDDOWN~![/COLOR][/i][/QUOTE]


Back to live action and Blonde has found his way out of the armbar during that interlude and has gotten the tag to Black, who comes in clubbing on the back of MARV. In a rotten mood, Black knocks MARV off his feet with a European uppercut, before taking a swipe at O'Hara from the apron which draws him into the ring. It's not a distraction tactic, Black really does want a piece of O'Hara. But it works as one thanks to Blonde, re-entering the ring and throwing MARV into the corner, where Faqu wraps an arm around his throat!

COACH
Where's Baron when ya need him? Haha!

COLE
Referee struggling to keep control here, which is going to play right into Cucaracha Internacional's hands, as we see right here!

Blonde just gets Faqu to release the choke before the referee can spot him, then orchestrates a tag to bring him into the ring. And Faqu goes right back to work with a more blatant choke in the corner.

"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE!"
"FOUR!"
"FI..."

Just breaking in time, Faqu starts screaming at the referee in Samoan, allowing Blonde to get in a couple of sneaky shots from the apron. Suddenly Landon looks a little more confident, as Faqu delivers a headbutt and looks for a cover...


1...



2...



No!

MARV picks himself up in a corner and tries to fend Faqu off, landing some kicks to the breadbasket before diving for the tag. The Samoan is alert enough to grab an ankle though and drags MARV back, dropping him with a hard clothesline. Encouraged by JB, Faqu then drops the boom with a big diving headbutt, hooking MARV up again...


1...



2...



O'Hara breaks it up.

COACH
I don't see the champions getting too 'high' anymore, do you Michael? It was only a matter of time. Face it, O'Hara and the Nerdlys, one trick-ponies. Cucaracha Internacional have got it all and they know how to put it together as a team, that's why they held them titles for over seven months.

Tag is made, Faqu bringing Blonde back in per request. Grabbing his partner by the hair, Blonde delivers a DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER~!, slamming Faqu and MARV's heads together safe in the knowledge that his partner wouldn't feel a thing. Instead Faqu just beats his chest, while Blonde covers...


1...



2...



NO!

"LET'S GO MARV!"
"LET'S GO MARV!"
"LET'S GO MARV!"
"LET'S GO MARV!"

Melody gets the crowd going, keeping half an eye on Megan and Landon sitting just a few feet away. Blonde gives his fellow Canadians the "up yours" for not supporting him, before scooping and slamming MARV. Off the ropes, he delivers a double stomp... and bottoms straight out with a back senton, right out of Landon Maddix's playbook. And Landon is able to smile for the first time tonight as Blonde kicks back and applauds his leader for just being him.


1...



2...



MARV SURPRISES BLONDE WITH A CRUCIFIX...


1...




2...




NO!!

COLE
Oh, so nearly utter embarrassment!

A shocked Blonde quickly cuts MARV back down with an elbow, before taking a moment to re-catch his breath. Unfortunately, he doesn't expect MARV to surprise him again, kipping up right into a headscissors to take Blonde over! Blonde scrambles back up and lunges for MARV, but a RICKY MORTON ROLL~! allows him to get the tag to MEL!!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

MEL comes in a house of fire, nailing Blonde with a flurry of punches before hitting the ropes. Underneath a clothesline goes MEL, then ducking a back elbow, before delivering a spinning heel kick!

COLE
The pace has quickened again!

Staggering to his feet, Blonde falls into a neutral corner and MEL delivers a flying clothesline against the buckles, landing on the middle rope. As Blonde staggers back out MEL pulls himself out to the apron, then to the top, before soaring with a Flying Crossbody...


1...




2...



NO!

Jumping to his feet, MEL delivers some more right hands, then looks to scoop Blonde up. The Trendsetter floats up and over the back though, then RAKES the eyes from behind, buying himself time to get the tag. Once MEL shakes off the effects to the eyes, he turns around...



*SMACK!*


...and Faqu DROPS him with a Thrust Kick!!

"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
That could do it, we could have new Champions right here.

With his partner screaming at him and Landon on the edge of his seat, Faqu makes the cover...


1...




2...




Kickout!

Landon eases back into his seat cursing under his breath, while Faqu again uses a blatantly choke as far as the count will go.

COACH
It's okay Landon, your guys have got the winning formula going again.

COLE
Well MEL was looking good until Blonde's eyerake and just like with MARV, Blonde's timely tag to a heavy hitter changed the face of the match. That the formula I guess?

COACH
I'd have made it sound a lot less like JB was a pussy.

Picking MEL back up, Faqu delivers a headbutt sending him into a neutral corner. The ropes hold MEL up as Faqu stalks towards him, striking him with a thrust to the throat. Faqu then whips MEL across the ring. The crowd urge MEL to move and so do his partners as Faqu loads up, beating his chest, before charging with an Avalanche! Meanwhile, Black enters the ring and suckers in MARV and O'Hara. The ref holds them back, allowing Blonde to run in with a clothesline, before hitting the follow-up bulldog!

COACH
There's some teamwork for ya. The doobie brothers here aren't the only ones who can string a couple of moves together.

As Blonde sneaks out of the ring he encourages Faqu to cover again...


1...




2...



NO!

On the outside, Landon shifts in his seat, beginning to get a little anxious maybe. Faqu sends MEL off the ropes and delivers a hard chop to knock him down. Off the ropes, Faqu then drops a Big Spla... NO! MEL moves and Faqu hits nothing but canvas. With Faqu winded, that allows MEL to RICKY MORTON ROLL~! and get the tag to O'Hara!

"YYYYEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

O'Hara leaps straight to the top rope and lands a springboard missile dropkick to Faqu! In comes Black, but O'Hara is able to sidesteps his charge and see him out to the floor.

COLE
The momentum has swung again and Landon's many ups and downs just feet away from us continue.

With a flurry of quick kicks, O'Hara takes the fight to Faqu in the corner before looking for an irish whip. Faqu stands steady and refuses to budge though. After a kick of his own he swings O'Hara into the corner instead, landing a headbutt while James Blonde comes in. Together Blonde and Faqu whip O'Hara corner to corner. Blonde follows in with a forearm shot and trips O'Hara's feet out, before looking to cut off MARV. But MARV nails a right hand, before he and MEL catch Blonde hanging onto the top rope, using a quick jerk of the cable to sling him over the top and out onto Black at ringside!

COLE
Beautiful somersault plancha by James Blonde, just a pity he didn't mean it!

As Blonde and Black lay in a heap, Faqu charges across the ring anyway with a cry for SAMOA~!~!...




...but O'Hara moves and Faqu drives his ample rear into the turnbuckles!!

COLE
Nobody home! The mistakes just keep on coming.

COACH
Come on guys, you gotta get it together already. Or else.

Landon shares those sentiments as he watches on, seeing Faqu fall to a seated position in the corner. Entering the ring, MARV and MEL quickly wrap their arms around O'Hara. The trio then run their makeshift chorus line across the ring, lunging in unison with a TRIPLE BASEMENT DROPKICK IN THE CORNER!!

"YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
Six boots to the chest! I don't care how big you are, that'll knock the wind out of you!

Together the Champions drag Faqu away from the ropes, O'Hara making the pin while MARV and MEL make themselves scarse...


1...




2...




NO!!

O'Hara quickly calls his tag team partners back in and signals for the end, as the referee tries in vain to get only one legal man in. Locking hands, MARV and MEL provide a leg up for O'Hara. But he wants two and carefully balances himself on The CAE's arms. On the count of three, The CAE then LAUNCH O'Hara up, sending him spinning into the air...




...AND CRASHING DOWN ACROSS FAQU WITH AN ASSISTED 630 SPLASH!!!!

"YYYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"

COLE
INCREDIBLE!!

COACH
Welcome to the bad books.

Landon hangs his head, as MARV and MEL count along with O'Hara's cover...



1...






2...





3-
NO, BLONDE MAKES THE LAST-DITCH SAVE!!!

O'Hara jumps Blonde, while Faqu rolls away. MARV and MEL make sure he reaches the floor with a couple of baseball slides, before MARV lies in wait with a Pescado... CAUGHT! Faqu catches MARV in his arms with ease! Seeing this, MEL quickly launches himself out as well though, a Somersault Pescado enough to knock Faqu off his feet with MARV!

COLE
There's bodies all over the place, MEL and MARV taking risk after risk and paying dividends with them so far!

In the ring, O'Hara sends Blonde off with an irish whi... NO, reversed. O'Hara hits the turnbuckles and Blonde follows with a clothesline, grabbing a headlock and looking for the Bulldog. But O'Hara pushes him off, sending JB crashing chest first into the opposite corner. Blonde stumbles backwards and gets taken down with the Black Russian Legsweep...


1...




2...




NO!

Quickly, O'Hara is up and onto the middle turnbuckle. He waits for Blonde to get back up, but notice Nathaniel Black until it's too late. Black climbs to the apron and grabs O'Hara leg, using it to haul him off the ropes and send him crashing to the canvas!!

"OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

COACH
See, what did I tell you? Sooner or later, you're gonna get caught.

COLE
Well you are if you've got two opponents to keep an eye on instead of one!

Referee Chioda reprimands Black as he tries to get into the ring, leading to a heated arguement breaking out. The arguement ends when MARV and MEL grab a hold of Black's legs to pull him from the apron, causing Black to instinctively grab onto Chioda's leg. Meanwhile, O'Hara is seeing stars and starts to pull himself up on the ropes...



...which is when LANDON leaps into action, rushing out of his seat and CLOCKING O'HARA IN THE SIDE OF THE HEAD WITH A DRIVE-BY ::BELTSHOT::~!!!!!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

COLE
WAIT A MINUTE!! Maddix just nailed O'Hara with one of the Six Man Titles!

COACH
That's what I call leading by example!

COLE
And the referee didn't see it, don't tell me it's gonna end like this!

Landon keeps on jogging and Megan, avoiding Melody, follows. Getting rid of the evidence, Landon dumps the belt next to Faqu and keeps on walking. Meanwhile, in the ring, Blonde's eyes light up. Dragging the lifeless O'Hara up, he locks on the Cobra Clutch and sweeps him out with Illegally Blonde, enough to fool Chioda as he makes the count...


1...





2...





3!!!!!

*DINGDINGDING!*

Blonde jumps up and clenches his fists in celebration. But there's no celebration from Maddix, not even bothering to turn around as he and Megan continue to leave.

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, your winners of the match... and NEEWWW OAOAST SIX MAN TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS of the WOOORRRLLLDD... NATHANIEL BLACK... JAMES BLONDE... AND FAQU... CUCARACHA INTERNACCCCIIIIOOOOOOOONNAAAAAALLLLLLLLL!!!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Referee Chioda seems confused as to why there are only two belts handed to him from the timekeeper's table. But Blonde doesn't care and snatches them away from him, cradling the belts like lost children.

COLE
Cucaracha Internacional, with the help of Landon Maddix, have just stolen back the World Six Man Tag Team Titles!

COACH
Yup, it was a team effort alright.

COLE
It was Landon saving his guys' asses if you ask me.

COACH
Henceforth, 'team effort'.

Blonde rolls out of the ring still cradling the belts and wondering aloud where Landon went. Snatching one of the belts away from Blonde, Black immediately marches off to the back with it, a similar lack of celebration to Landon. Blonde is left to collect Faqu and guide him away, while The CAE have rolled into the ring and get the chain of events explained to them by Melody.

COLE
A bit of a bitter-sweet victory if you ask me, James Blonde seems to be the only one even remotely happy with what just went down.

COACH
It's not about happiness, it's about vindication. They never should have lost the belts in the first place, they got them back, henceforth vindication.

COLE
Since when did you know what 'henceforth' means?