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Kinetic

List things that don't interest you

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Do you often find yourself in the company of Brendan Fraser fanatics? I can't say that this has happened to me. It's too bad, really; I have a compelling and potentially career-resurrecting idea for Mr. Fraser. Hear me out on this one, okay? We reboot the Encino Man franchise. That's it. We just make a new Encino Man. Pretend like the other one never happened.

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I've always been accused of not liking animals. That's not entirely true, it'd be more accurate to say I'm indifferent to them. I've never wanted a traditional pet like a cat or dog, and the only animals I really find interesting are reptiles, and lions, tigers, and elephants. I especially like snakes and crocodilians. The only pet I've ever had was a python.

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My brothers best friend (who happened to be my old best friend until I grew up) is the worst with this. He's 22, a total stoner with no job, the ugliest girlfriend who will not shut up about trying to sleep with me, barely shows up to school, has no job and no ambition in life. But yet, his mom bought him a 2007 Mustang and its everything to him. He will not shut up about this stupid car. We can be talking about something completely different and it comes back to the car. He thinks he is the coolest guy on the planet because he has this car, yet I've seen 4 or 5 of them in our neighborhood (same stupid yellow color and everything). It's ridiculous.

 

 

His family went broke and he has to give the mustang back. I almost feel bad about this now. But not really.

They went broke in four days?

 

 

Yeah. Apparently the pyramid scam they invested all of their money in went belly-up. Who would have thought? Not me, that's for sure. If only someone told them it was a bad idea. Oh wait, I did.

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