The One & Only SmartMarks Battle Royal Thread

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

(Kotzenjunge wakes up in time to watch the Yankees lose, and starts watching the Tennessee game, still waiting for a phone call or some kind of contact)

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Sandman9000]

::Sandman decides to go to bed, even though it is only 8:30. Nothing good has happened today, might as well end the day early, and not wake up until Monday::

[Guest Midnight Express83]

::while Sandman is sleeping takes out an old school mace and bangs in right in the stomach with it::

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

(hears a distant yelp of pain)

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Midnight Express83]

::finds Spoony and takes said mace and knocks him up side the head and starts on a man looking for Kylie::

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

(gets up, looks at his busted up face in a mirror, and curses because he'll look like crap for when he goes out tonight(hopefully). He seeks out ME83 to kick his ass for spoiling his chances with the psychotic Art School chick)

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest The Superstar]

::Beltshots Spoon with his OAOMEF X Title belt for agreeing that I was a washed up hasbeen (I DIDN'T MEAN IT, DAMN YOU!)::

[Guest Midnight Express83]

::finds Kylie and smashes her face into a wall then spray paints "Ugly" on her back::

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

(destroys ME83, but not before ripping his testicles off with a crowbar(you know, the claw end), slicing his face up with a fishing knife, crushing his ribcage and internal organs with a sledgehammer, shoving a pickaxe through his spinal column, and nailing his hands and feet to the ground. A gallon of gas and a lit match later, and ME83 is no more.)

 

(Kotzenjunge finds that Kylie doesn't have any facial injuries, and helps her wash the paint off)

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Sandman9000]

::Sandman decides that what Kotzen did wasn't overkill enough, so he loads what remains of ME83 into a car, lifts the car up with a forklift, and drops it onto its hood. Just to ensure that ME83 won't no-sell, Sandman hits the car with a Hummer and a Semi.

[Guest CED Ordonez]

*sits crosslegged in the vicinity watching the mayhem that has ensued.*

 

CED: Damn, that's some party I'm missing.

 

*shrugs shoulders and goes back to eating his Chinese take-out*

[Guest Midnight Express83]

::waits until the following night on RAW where I can be upgraded to minor injuries and living, plus can no sell death::

[Guest cobainwasmurdered]

::CWM STRUTS in and starts downing beer...Canadian of course. He tosses his empties at Midnight's head::

[Guest alfdogg]

::informs BML of the blatant gimmick infringement by CWM::

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

(gets hit by a stray beer can and kicks CWM's ass for it)

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Rob Edwards]

(Surprises Kotzengunge with the fingerpoke of doom)

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

(says "NO POBO!!" and strikes back with his own FINGERPOKE OF DOOM~!)

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Rob Edwards]

(Dies but then gets hit by the reviving elbow and begins a Hulk up/Tatanka wardance combo)

[Guest midnight_burn]

::Is merely passing by but spontaneously combusts due to the awesome power of the Hulk Up/Tatanka wardance combo::

[Guest Midnight Express83]

::does KIP UP OF DOOM. Gets two Russian sickles. Takes one and throws it like a dagger at spoony going deep into his shoulder bearly missing his neck. Takes the other one and finds Kylie, backswings to my chest first then as fast as I can onto the back of her head. Has Tyra respray paint ugly on her. gets in the Lambo and drives off getting the hell away from all this::

[Guest Rob Edwards]

(Is hiding in the back of the limo and applies the main event sleeper)

[Guest Sandman9000]

::Firebombs the limo::

[Guest Chuck Woolery]

::randomly hits everyone in the thread with a long rope of string cheese. Leaves::

[Guest CED Ordonez]

*No sells the string cheese rope and eats it.*

 

*Spin the wheel, make the deal...lands on CAPTURE THE MIDGET~! and CED promptly unleashes the aborted gimmick match into the fray.*

[Guest cobainwasmurdered]

::CWM clubs the midget and uses a Gnome to beat CED into submission::

[Guest RevEvil]

I pull out a gun and murder CWM.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

(NO POBO!!s ME83's offense because he's been DESTROYED.)

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Zorin Industries 0]

:: enters the fight talking about how great 80's electro music is, everyone else stops, looks at each other, then beats the crap out of Zorin::

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

::Uses unholy magic to animate all his metal cds. which promptly jump up and beat the crap out of Zorin's album collection.::

[Zorin Industries 0]

:: Zorin uses his intense animal magnetisim to get his ladies to attack AoO::

 

(yes, i know this is bullshit, but still...)