alfdogg 0 Report post Posted July 25, 2009 Make this the last Battlebowl match. We come back from commercial straight to the tumbler, where Josh is opening a plastic container. JOSH First participant will be..."SWEET" LUCIUS SOUL! Lucius makes his way out of the dressing room and heads out. JOSH His partner... Josh opens another container, and opens the paper. JOSH One of the Last Kings of Scotland, SCOTTISH SCOTT! COACH Two of the Queen's Men paired together! JOSH And now their opponents! COLE And this will be our last Battlebowl match, just for the record! JOSH From Panic at the Disco, VINNY VALENTINE! COLE And Vinny's partner, Biff Atlas, has already qualified! Wouldn't it be something if both members of Panic at the Disco made it to the finals? JOSH His partner will be the bodyguard for the Deadly Alliance, ARTURAS! COACH Wow! You gotta love those chances now, Cole! COLE We've already seen Thunderkid and Mr. Dick both qualify, Arturas would make three from the Deadly Alliance! COACH It should be four, but Reject didn't get there, thanks to Alfdogg! Cut to the ring, where Lucius is hammering away on Vinny, while Reject gives instructions to Arturas from the aisle. Vinny is bounced from the ring, as Arturas joins the frey. He climbs in, and Scott and Lucius attempt a double clothesline...but when they hit him, they go right past him and stop, their hands never even separating! COLE Look at that! COACH It's like trying to clothesline a redwood! Arturas looks at the two men trying to bring him down for a couple seconds, then wraps an arm around each, bringing them to the front, and ramming their heads together! He then takes down Lucius with a MAFIA KICK~! COLE Arturas dominating in there, big kick! He then whips Scott into the ropes, and catches him with a BIG powerslam! He then holds his arm out in a hook shake, waiting for Lucius to get to his feet. COACH Russian sickle time! COLE It looks like Arturas is going to do it all by himself in there! Lucius gets to his feet, and Arturas levels him with a RUSSIAN SICKLE~! Lucius does a backwards somersault on the mat. Arturas then levels Scott with a RUSSIAN SICKLE~! as well, turning him for a backflip with a half turn! COLE Look at those clotheslines, those Russian sickles! Arturas drops to one knee, and covers Scott with one hand... 1... 2... 3!!! *DING DING DING* COACH He did it! Vinny's going to Battlebowl! COLE Oh please, it was Arturas who did all the work! BUFFER [i]The winners of the match...the team of VINNY VALENTINE, and ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAS SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!![/i] Vinny jumps up and down and celebrates as Arturas gives a blank stare into the crowd, before raising his arms. COACH But how about this Cole...Team Heyross! The Orange County Cobras! The Heavenly Rockers! The Moneygang! None of those teams could make it intact, but Panic at the Disco, Biff and Vinny...they're both going to the finals! COLE Well, anything can happen as a result of Battlebowl! Of course, the tag team champions, as well as the #1 contenders in the Moneygang, both had the misfortune of being drawn as opponents! And of course, V.I.C.E. will be represented by both of its members as well, with CPA qualifying earlier tonight! Suddenly, Cole and Coach are practically ambushed by Tony Tourettes, who puts on a headset and puts his arms around them. TONY WE DID IT! I TOLD BOTH YOU DIRTY FUCKERS! VINNY DIDN'T DO SHIT, IT WAS ALL THAT BIG BALD ASSHOLE, BUT HE MADE IT! WE STOMPED THEIR BIG, FAT VAGINAS! WE'RE GONN... Tony reaches back and grabs a fan's bucket of popcorn, eating a handful and tossing the rest of the bucket up in the air, with it all landing on Tony, Cole and Coach. He then grabs two Cokes from the crowd, raises them up in the air, and smashes them together, causing them to explode on all three men. Tony then lets out a big yell, before being pulled away by Vinny. COLE Well, hopefully we can get someone out here to clean things up during our next break, but first, we've got to talk about the Battlebowl finals, we've got a whole field set now, and here's the rundown! Thunderkid, Bohemoth, Logan Mann, Tango Bosley, Biff Atlas, Colombian Heat, Mr. Dick, Baron Windels, Denzel Spencer, Charlie Moss, Colin Maguire Jr., Leon Rodez, J-MAX, CPA, and the "team" we just saw, Vinny Valentine and Arturas, and I use quotations because that match was all the big man, Vinny did nothing out there! COACH But he got to Battlebowl! COLE That he did. We've had a lot of upsets, notably, Zack Malibu, Alfdogg, Reject all in qualifying matches, but did not advance, but we do have some big names in there, most notably, I believe, Leon Rodez and Bohemoth, set to meet in a stretcher match, will also both be competing in this battle royal! The Enterprise will send four members, Logan Mann, CMJ, as well as both members of V.I.C.E., CPA and Bosley! The Deadly Alliance will be represented by three men, Thunderkid, Mr. Dick, and of course Arturas who we just saw! Coach, do you have a prediction? COACH Well...we haven't seen the big man against the best competition as of yet, I want to see what he does in there with some of those bigger names! COLE Could you imagine Arturas coming face-to-face with Bohemoth? COACH Wow! COLE It's coming a week from tonight, the finals of Battlebowl at the Chi-Town Spectacular! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
