Tony149 0 Report post Posted April 30, 2010 The lights dim and the spotlight shines mid-ring on Michael Buffer. * DING * DING * DING * DING * BUFFER This is your main event of the evening! Scheduled for one fall and sanctioned by the OAOAST, it’s for THE HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP OF THE WORLD! Are you ready? “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” BUFFER Detroit, Michigan… ARE… YOU… READY? "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BUFFER Then for the thousands in attendance and the millions watching around the world… Ladies and gentlemen… LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLET'S GET READY TO RRRRRRRRRRRUMMMMMMBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! “It‘s Not My Time” by 3 Doors Down cues and Tim Cash happily scrolls to the ring. BUFFER Introducing first, the challenger… from Peoria, Illinois... weighing 220 pounds… wrestling's last real good guy... TTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMM CCAAAAAAASSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHH!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Being the good guy that he is, Cash waves and poses for pictures with fans. COLE We could all use a little Tim Cash inside of us. COACH You’re right about that, Cole. Cash is little and you’d love him inside of you. *laughs* COLE (no sells Coach’s remark) As you can see, ladies and gentlemen, Baron Windels is not present ringside. He’ll be watching this one backstage on a monitor. COACH Yeah, rather than go out on a limb and pick a side. Obviously he wants to ride the winner’s coattails. “Motherfucker of the Year” by Motley Crue hits as golden pyro shower Mister Dick and Malaysia. BUFFER And his opponent, accompanied by MALAYSIA… from San Antonio, Texas, weighing 238 pounds… one-half of the One & Only World tag team champions, here is the reigning and defending OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion… MMMIIIIIIIIIIISSSSTTEEEERRRRRR DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKK!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" MD takes a seat in the corner and spanks the World title, which dangles out of the front of his short shorts. Malaysia then crawls over on all fours and removes the World title with her teeth. COLE Did somebody crank up the heat? It sure got hot out here. COACH Something’s up alright, but it’s not the heat. Referee Earl Hebner grabs possession of the belt and holds it high for all to see. COLE And there you see the richest prize in the game today, the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title. * DINGDINGDING * Cash greets MD with a big smile and his hand extended, but MD has other ideas in mind. Like a series of right jabs. COACH When Mister Dick said he wasn’t going to treat Cash any differently because of their mutual friendship with Baron Windels, he wasn’t lying. MD whips Cash in for a PRESS SLAM, then to the corner for his trademark CROSS BODY SPLASH… but Cash moves and MD gets hung across the top rope! Cash follows with a series of kicks to the midsection that causes MD to CROTCH himself! MISTER DICK :o ENZIGURI knocks MD to the arena floor where he crashes against the guardrail following a SUICIDE DIVE! COLE Tim Cash in full control. Cash rolls MD back in and receives a FACIAL~! COACH Pow! Right in the kisser! MD goes out after Cash and shoves him into the RINGPOST. Cash stumbles around ringside until MD rams him face-first into Cole’s crotch! Again! And again! COLE :wub: Cole’s pleasure turns to pain as Malaysia steps on his pubes after MD tosses Cash inside. COACH :lol: MD paintbrushes Cash and then delivers an atomic drop, the prelude to the clothesline from hell… but Cash ducks under and takes MD down in a CRUCIFIX! ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Both men pop up, MD whiffs on a Stiff Kick and gets drilled by a BACKBRAIN WHEELKICK! Cash scales the buckles as MD staggers to his feet and scores with a MISSLE DROPKICK! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Via split-screen we see Baron Windels jump out of his seat as Cash whips MD in for an old school SLEEPER HOLD, but MD goes behind and executes a DIVING FULL NELSON SLAM! COLE Pure Penetration! Rather than go for the cover MD delivers a HEADBUTT TO THE GROIN, which he claims was to the midsection when scolded by the referee. COACH The OAOAST Champion just being a dick. MD introduces Cash violently to the turnbuckle, then works him over in the corner with numerous jabs. MD whips Cash across and successfully delivers a CORNER CROSSBODY! COLE Bite My Giant Dick! COACH I’ll pass. Thank you very much. Cash stumbles out into a STIFF KICK! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Noticeably frustrated, MD dumps Cash outside and flings him against the steel steps, then slams him hard on the arena floor. COLE You can feel the intensity level picking up as this match goes longer and longer. MD rolls inside and the ref starts a 10 count. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! Cash rises to his knees and grabs the bottom rope, only to go back down after being kicked square between the eyes. But at least it restarts the count. Unfortunately it also leads to Malaysia’s involvement as she levels Cash with a forearm smash. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh, come on. Was that really called for? Malaysia again tries to deliver a cheap shot, but this time BARON WINDELS runs out to stop her. "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BW shoos Malaysia away, then receives an earful from MD who questions why he’s ringside. COACH Well, at least Baron Windels finally took a side. He’s pulling for Tim Cash. COLE I don’t know about that. Clearly he wants the bout to remain free of interference though. MD looks to suplex Cash back in from the apron, but Cash nails MD in the midsection with a shoulder and performs a SUNSET FLIP! ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Cash executes a hip toss, then a belly-to-belly suplex. The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Cash goes for THE MIDWEST SLING but gets wrapped in a SMALL PACKAGE! ONE! TWO! NO, KICKOUT! MD whips Cash in for a press slam, but Cash floats over and delivers a KNEE BREAKER INTO BACK SUPLEX, followed by THE MIDWEST SLING! COLE Are we about to see the greatest upset in OAOAST history? Malaysia apparently fears so and hops on the apron… but so too does Baron Windels. COACH He’s gonna hit a woman, Cole. Cash immediately breaks the MWS to defuse the situation between BW and Malaysia, which allows MD to shove Cash into BW/Malaysia and rolls him up! ONE! TWO! THR-- NO, KICKOUT!! COLE It’s not over yet! How Cash managed to kick out I’ll never know. What grit being displayed by wrestling’s last real good guy. Woozy from the previous collision Cash falls prey to a new move from MD… THE JACKHAMMER! ONE! TWO! THREE!!! * DINGDINGDINGDING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match… and still OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion… MMMIIIIIIIIIIISSSSTTEEEERRRRRR DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKK!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Though mostly a loud ovation, more than a few boos can be hard. COLE A valiant effort by Tim Cash, but it wasn’t enough to walk out of here tonight the new World Heavyweight Champion. Malaysia hands MD the World title and he poses over his defeated opponent, prompting BW to gently push him away. COACH What’s that idiot doing interrupting Dick’s celebration? BUTT hurt over Cash’s defeat? COLE It’s pretty obvious to me BW just wants Jock to show a little sportsmanship. There’s no need to pose over Tim Cash. MD and BW exchange a few words until MD decides to walk away… straight into a clothesline from NED BLANCHARD! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" COACH Where did he come from?!? Ned rams MD into the buckle and proceeds to stomp a mud hole in his ass, figuratively speaking of course. BW comes to MD’s aid but winds up getting into it with SIMON SINGLETON. COLE We’ve got all 4 men going at it now. COACH It’s like a mini-battle royal, Cole. OAOAST officials rush to the ring to restore order, then BW grabs a mic. BARON Hey, if you fellas wanna hook ’em up, then meet us in the ring next week on HeldDOWN~! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" MISTER DICK :huh: Simon and Ned accept the challenge. COLE Oh, my! The Orange County Cobras vs. the Lone Star Gunslingers next week! © 2010 OAOAST Entertainment Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
