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It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.

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How To Vibrate
 

11-9

11.) Genesis-Calling All Stations You think Genesis with Phil Collins as the focus sucks? Well, they suck harder without him believe it or not. Here, the band tries to combine their pop success with their art-rock genius of the 70's. The end result? An over polished, over indulgent, synth heavy (in the bad sense), and horrible songs like "Congo" and "Small Talk." I remember being a teenager, and one of my mom's friends talking about how bad it is, and the Daily Show making fun of it. That's the only good that came out of it.   10.) Butthole Surfers-The Weird Revolution I love the Butthole Surfers. There 80's albums are the most disturbing Psychedelic Rock albums ever recorded. This 2001 however, almost makes you forget those great moments. Filled with generic Beck soundalikes, bland industrial rock/trip hop mixes, none of the awesome guitar work of Leary, and a song produced by Kid Rock of all people. (So for those who were wondering were Kid Rock was in this countdown, here you go.)   09.) The Clash-Cut the Crap Crap indeed. After Mick Jones left the Clash, Joe Strummer (may he R.I.P.) tried to do an album that sounded like old punk-quick and to the point. The album itself doesn't cut it (pun intened), as it sounds like a bad parody of punk. It also sounds formullaic, boring, and lyrically horrendous. This was the last Clash album also, though Strummer went to do much better things.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

8-6

08.) Aerosmith-Rock in a Hard Place At this point in their career, Aerosmith were in some serious trouble. We all know about the drugs and whatnot, and Joe Perry and Brad Whitford being kicked out. The result? Fortunately, not something that tries to keep up with the times, but Aerosmith's worst. "Joanie's Butterfly" is a real cringer, with it's bad attempt at psychedellia, while "Jailbait" sounds like a bad leftover song, as does much of the album. At least Joe Perry returned after this one.   07.) Elvis Presley-Having Fun on Stage No it's not music. It's Elvis in his 70's lowpoint, basically talking on stage. That's right, an album of Elvis doing nothing but talking, telling jokes (you haven't lived untill you've heard Elvis try to impersonate a Black Woman), asking for a glass of water, showing us eleven ways to pronounce "Memphis", and generally making an ass of himself. This was released thanks to Col. Tom Parker BTW, and was actually released as a legitimate concert album. Strangest of all: There's 5 fucking volumes of this. No, I'm not kidding you, there is 5 volumes of this. And let me remind you, this wasn't released to piss off the label, like Metal Machine Music-this really was released as a serious, legitimate album.   06.) Mick Jagger-She's the Boss Ok, I can understand Mick wanting to do an album that doesn't sound much like the Stones, but this is unforgiveable. Featuring a who's who of artists (Herbie Hancock, Pete Townsend, and even Jeff Beck) to do a generic. dated, and all around awful album. Actually, now that I think about it, all of Jaggers solo work sucks, but this really bears to be mentioned because it's the first one that came to mind. Oh, and don't get me started on the cover.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

The Countdown Ends

02.) Vanilla Fudge-The Beat Goes On The award winner for the most pretentious album of all time, this is an album made up of covers (Vanilla Fudge were largely a covers band) of the Beatles, Sunny and Cher, Mozart, and others. There aren't any real songs on it, as it's pretty much an album made up largely of various versions of "The Beat Goes On", as we hear world leaders (yeah, the love ins are just dying out here) telling of the bomb dropping, and other such things. Bummer. Oh, and it also has interview excerpts of the band talking about how disheartening and cold the industry is. Well, they agreed to release this (and Having Fun With Elvis on Stage). Oh, and it has and readings from the Bible and JFK and Hitler and bad prog rock noodling and-the list goes on. This is the most over indulgent, self important piece of shit ever recorded. Really, listen to it, then see if you disagree with me. It takes the song "The Beat Goes On", and tries to trace it to the history of Western Civilization.   01.) VA-Sgt. Peppers Lonely Heart's Club Band OST This album is proof of everything that is evil about the record industry, and is the worst album of all time. First, the backstory: You Know of the Beatles album. Hell, I'm sure you own it. Well, the man that gave you "Saturday Night Fever" and "Grease" (I always hated those movies) decided that the album would be a great movie. So he cast The Bee-Gees, Peter Frampton, Steve Martin (why Steve), George Burns, Jeff Beck, Aerosmith, and Alice Cooper. That's right, one of the greatest albums ever recorded was turned into a failed marketing attempt. The end result is largely considered to be the worst album ever recorded, and for good reason. It also destroyed the careers of the Bee-Gees, Frampton, Earth Wind and Fire,and almost destroyed Jeff Beck Alice Cooper's. The album got released, and got so many returns and complaints, that the industry actually asked RCA for their certificate back. The rest is history.     And that is the end of it. Hope you liked the countdown. Here's a recap to end it all   50.) The new Insane Clown Posse Album. (include because Carnival hates it so much) 49.) Boston-Corporate America 48.) Coil-Constant shallowness Leads To Evil 47.) Neil Young-Landing on Water 46.) Hammer-The Funky Headhunter 45.) The Rolling Stones-Dirty Work 44.) Pink Floyd-The Final Cut 43.) A Perfect Circle-eMotive 42.) Roger Waters-Radio K.A.O.S. 41.) Current 93-Aryan Aquarians 40.) Rage Against The Machine-Renegades 39.) Yes-Big Generator 38.) Frank Sinatra-Trilogy 37.) Public Enemy-Muse Sick-N-Hour-Mess Age 36.) Stone Roses-Second Coming 35.) Emerson, Lake, and Palmer-Love Beach 34.) Cabaret Voltaire-Groovy, Laid Back, and Nasty 33.) Can-Saw Delight 32.) Burzum-Daudi Baldrs 31.) Ministry-Filth Pig 30.) The Happy Mondays-Yes, Please 29.) Death in June-All Pigs Must Die 28.) Prince-The Rainbow Children 27.) Kiss-Music for the Elder 26.) Foetus Symphony Orchestra-York 25.) Michael Jackson-HIStory 24.) Madonna-American Life 23.) Kevin Federline-Playing With Fire (because no list of worst albums would be complete without it) 22.) Vanilla Ice-Hard to Swallow 21.) Eminem-Encore 20.) Tin Machine-Tin Machine 19.)The Heads-No Talking, Just Head 18.) Slayer-Diabolus in Musica 17.) DJ Shadow-The Outsider 16.) Black Sabbath-Never Say Die! 15.) Black Sabbath-Forbidden 14.) Judas Priest-Turbo 13.) Van Halen-Van Halen III 12.) Depeche Mode-Songs of Faith and Devotion Live 11.) Genesis-Calling All Stations 10.) Butthole Surfers-The Weird Revolution 09.) The Clash-Cut the Crap 08.) Aerosmith-Rock in a Hard Place 07.) Elvis Presley-Having Fun on Stage 06.) Mick Jagger-She's the Boss 05.) Chunky A-Large and In Charge 04.) Metallica-St. Anger 03.) Pink Floyd-A Momentary Lapse in Reason 02.) Vanilla Fudge-The Beat Goes On 01.) VA-Sgt. Peppers Lonely Heart's Club Band OST            
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Falwell, Friends List

-Well, Jerry Falwell kicked the bucket, and will most likely live in a personal hell of homosexuals. He'll be missed by-ah, who am I kidding? I always hated the fucker, so good riddence. I'm not going to celebrate, but I sure as hell won't miss him.   -Oh, I'm suprised it took me this long, but I added people to my friends list: The people I added:   Lushus Carnival Coat is my Father Czech KOAB Special K   If you want added, let me know.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Albums on my IPod

Ever since I got an IPod, I've had albums on it that are favorites on that IPod, Thing is, that list tends to change, so here's soe current favorites.   The Slits-Cut-A reggae producer produces a band from an all femal punk band who aren't that good with their instruments (what punk band back in the day was?) and makes this badass album. It's a punk/postpunk classic, with plenty of reggae/dub rhythms, sardonic lyrics, and plenty of attitude.   James Brown-Black Caesar OST-Soundtrack Brown did for a Blaxspotation flick is pretty damn catchy, with classics like "The Boss" and "Down and Out in New York City." A realy underrated gem.   Cabaret Voltaire-Code-OOP and hard to find, this album is probably the groups most accessible release, filled with electro and funk groves while still not losing any of their identity.   Joy Division-Closer-The band's second (and last) studio album predicts the oncoming goth and new wave movements coming together. Also may be the most depressing album ever recorded.   EPMD-Strictly Buisiness-Old school hip hop at it's best, with plenty of samples, catchy beats, and awesome rhymes. Also the first hip hop album I know of to reference Steve Martin.   Scientist-Heavyweight Dub Champion-Pretty short, but awesome dub reggae album.   Agalloch-Not Unlike the Waves-I already mentioned this in the "Metal Albums I'm enjoying" entry.   Henry Mancini-A Touch of Evil OST-Hell yes. Soundtrack to a classic film noir movie directed by Orson Welles, and full of old scholl rock, afro cuban rhythms, sleezy horns, old west style pianos, and other such things   Manfred Hubler and Siegfried Schwab-Vampyros Lesbos Sexadelic Dance Party-Another awesome soundtrack (to a pretty bad movie) features plenty of organ, mod style fuzzy guitars, sitars, trombones, and other old school psychedelic sounds. Great stuff.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Crazy Preacher pt. 2, Homework, and RIP Bruno Mattei

-Last Friday, I finally got to see the crazy preacher dude I told you about last time. The guy himself is a riot, and dances around a whole lot. Really, he does a little footwork. He also has a tendancy to smack his bible and shove it in people's faces. Anyways, he railed on and on about homosexuals (I hear he did a lot of ranting about Catholics when I wasn't there), so I told him "You know, gor a guy who rails on about homosexuals a lot, you sure do have a pretty gay hat." Afterwards, a gay guy walked up to me and said "I agree with ya dude." I haven't seen the crazy preacher since, though next time, I'll probably recite the theme from "Fresh Prince of Bell Air" to him.   -I do have an excuse for not doing many journal entries lately: I've been knee deep in homework. I've had to finish reports, and finals are coming up, so there's the sad excuse.   -Good news: "Masters of Horror" has been renewed for a third season.   -Finally, Italian exploitation and horror director Bruno Mattei (aka "Vincent Dawn") has died. While none of his movies ("Hell of the Living Dead", "The Other Hell", "SS Extermination Love Camp", and "Rats: Night of Terror") were actually good, they were at least so good they were bad, in a MST3K sort of way.   1931-2007
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Memorial Day, My Brother Graduates.

-Well, happy memorial day. Or not. Depends on who you are. Me, I'm spending it in my dorm, sweating like a pig. Don't know why, since the air conditioner is on full blast.   -Yesterday, my brother finally graduated from Highschool. It's strange seeing this happen, since I still remember him as a newborn in my mother's arms. It may be cliche, but they really do grow up fast. Anyways, I'm really proud of him. He's training to become a physician, and is going to spend the summer the same as always: working and relaxing at home.   -Good news for fellow horror nerds: "From Beyond" and "The Burning" come out on Sept. 11th, 2007. So yeah, something good coming out of 9/11. I can't wait for "From Beyond", it's a wonderfully deranged movie.   -Finally, Charles Nelson Reilly died, which is a shame. I always liked the guy, and he's always quotable, so RIP Charlie.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Come on now...

Honestly.   Why do some people not like me? I never considered myself the best poster, but a bad poster? Seriously, what the fuck?   Also, do Incandenza and Slayer actually like anyone?
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Why I prefer this place to Myspace and Livejournal

The fact that they allowed shit like this. At least they are deleting it. Here's some choice quotes, with choice crazy bolded.   So, why would they (Livejournal) even let shit like this exist on their website in the first place?   Jesus Christ, isn't that illegal?   Lady, you write fanporn. You aren't Stephen King Or Ambrose Bierce or William Burroughs. You aren't a legitimate author.   See comment # 3   In short: Fans are sickos and need to be neutered.   If you write a story like that, you are a fucking pedophile. End of discussion.   Apparently, Harry Potter fans are middle agerd, sexually repressed housewives who feel the need to write about underaged fictional characters fucking one another.   That's 4,468 people who should be in jail for most likely owning kiddie porn.   In short, the internet is the ultimate support group for the completely disgusting.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Smoking Aces, Iran hates Porn, Music of 2007 so far

-I watched "Smoking Aces" last night. Here's another movie that runs out of steam in the last third or so, complete with a dreadful plot twist. Still, I think it's worth checking out at least one. Alicia Keyes is in it (and absoulutely smoking hot), as are the funniest pair of Neo -Nazi brothers ever, Jason Bateman (I did not need to see him in bra and panties) and a hyperactive kid on ritalin who does kung fu and pops a major boner.   -Iran hates porn apparently, and is hanging those who are pornstars. Come on, at least have respect for the Pornstars. The fact that they do what they do is an impressive mix of bravery and lack of self confidence.   I knew a guy back in High School who wanted to be a pornstar. I wonder if he ever realized that many male pornstars have to start out by doing gay porn...   -Oh, we're nearing the middle of 2007, and there's been some good, and some bad, and some so-so in the music front. Here's the general thoughts on it:   Good and great:   LCD Soundsystem-Sound of Silver Grinderman-Grinderman Boris & Michio Kurihara-Rainbow !!!-Myth Takes Jesu-Conqueror Motor-Unhuman Redman-Red Gone Wild: Thee Album Merzbow-Coma Berenices Nine Inch Nails-Year Zero (Never liked them, but this is a great album)   So-so:   Air-Pocket Symphony Queens of the Stone Age-Era Vulgaris (great album title though) Sister Vanilla-Little Pop Rock Throbbing Gristle-Part Two - The Endless Not (Apparently, the first and original industrial band should have stayed away from each other. A real disappointment, though there's some good moments) Explosions in the Sky-All the Sudden I Miss Everyone Bjork-Volta   The Bad:   Timbaland-Timbaland Presents Shock Therapy (Worst album of 2007 so far) The Bravery-The Sun and the Moon Adult-Why Bother? (Why bother indeed) Dntel-Dumb Luck Mika-Life in Cartoon Motion Marilyn Manson-Eat Me, Drink Me (Granted, he always sucked, but now it's just embarrising. At least it's not as bad as Golden Age of Grotesque.) Satellite Party-Satellite Party (Perry, it's time to just stop.) The new Chris Cornell album
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

A visit to Dr. Octagoncologyst

-Hillary Clinton chose a Celine Dion song as her campaign song. I would have had her go with Cum Drenched Tits by William H. Nutsack. At least Kerry had the decency to go with Zeppelin.   -Band of the moment: The Angelic Process, who are like Doom Metal meets The Swans meets My Bloody Valentine meets Sigur Ros. I love this stuff, and their new album is in my future purchases list.   -I mentioned Dr. Dre's The Chronic, and I can't believe that I forgot how awesome that album really is. The production is so top notch, it's practically a joke (I'm a sucker for really good hip hop production), and damnit, "Lyrical Gangbang" is underrated. I should probably do a "best hip hop albums of all time" list, but that would be too hard.   -This is what Scientoligists actually believe. I really, really hope that someday, this whole cult disappears. Then again, there are people who believe that they are dragons, they just aren't dangerous.   Yeah, sorry for the boring entry.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Master of Reality

-Matt Young's telling us about his personal life again. Matt, here's some advice: It would be best not to tell people too much about your personal life. Seriously, if there is anything you need to work on, it's that. Not because of people not caring, but because it reflects really badly on you. This is one of the reasons I tend to be hush hush on my personal life. Actually, it's mostly because my personal life is fucking boring, but I digress.   -I'm going to see 1408 tonight. Normally, I don't check out PG-13 rated horror flicks, but it's been getting good reviews, and has a great cast.   -I checked out TNA last night out of boredom, and wasn't too impressed. Sure, Samoa Joe is great, and I love some of the guys there, but it was still kind of boring. It felt a bit like a mix of WCW Nitro and WCW Worldwide. Also, I'm suprised nobody on the boards is now called "Black Machismo." Oh, and poor Jarrett.   -My new favorite Youtube video. It sounds more like a stuck pig than a dog.        
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

More Entries about Buildings and Food

-For those who don't know, the whole Benoit thing not only continues to be fucked up, but has become a "media circus", as you might say. Thw Warrior is supposed to give us his Warrior Wisdom on Hannity and Colmes tonight, Nancy "I'm an Insufferable Cunt" Grace has been well, an insufferable cunt, O'Rilley and Geraldo "The Moustache of Time" Rivera have been jackasses, Debra made me feel bad for her, Jericho saved the day by being the most rational, and the WWE folder continues to suck. That last part isn't anything new though.   The real winner as far as embarresment so far, has been Chyna. Here's somebody that's living proof of how one can fall from grace. She's gone from being a notable figure in the wrestling (who was never really a good worker) to becoming a coked up, bordering on fat mess. Her porn tape destroyed the sanity of many (Me, I've seen much worse), and it's a bizarre blend of depressing and hilarious. Just remember: No matter how bad things are, at least you aren't Chyna.   -The Beastie Boys (remember back when they were good?) have a new album made up completely of instrumentals, and it sucks. It's just really boring and unmotivated, without anything that hasn't been done before, only they've done it better (the instrumental breaks in Check Your Head and Ill Communication, the retro cool of In Sound From Way Out), and others have done much better. It's at least a better ablum than To the 5 Burroughs (which had one good single in "C-c-c-check It Out") and Hello Nasty (good singles, nothing else). If anything it's cheap, and probably makes alright background music for those times you wanna smoke pot. Oh, and it does have a few (repeat, a few) decent tracks.   -Finally, here's Rosie O Donnell's daughter Yes, that's really her. Right now, Tom Selleck is smiling, and I don't blame him. It's amazing that in the world of obnoxius female celebrities, Rosie is the only one who pisses me off.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

A week later...

-A week ago, we learned that Chris Benoit was murderer.   Since then, things seemed to have cooled down fortunately. The thread about Benoit's death became a complete clusterfuck. Deon made the biggest ass of himself (not that it's a major accomplishment for him) and we didn't learn jack shit about anything, other than Benoit was a fucked up individual.   -I'm going to see an early show of "Transformers" tonight at midnight. Lucky me. I'll tell you how it is next time. The good reviews are good, while the bad ones seem to be clueless, especially the one from Slant Magazine.   Sorry about the tiny update.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Favorite Hip Hop songs part 2

Ice Cube - Today was a Good Day His jimmy went so deep it put the mammy to sleep. Those are words to love.   Wu Tang Clan - Bring Tha Ruckus Probably my favorite album opening yet, and an excellent statement of intent song. Ghost Face Killah's verse in the song is sure awesomeness.   Pharcyde - I'm That Type of Nigga The Pharcyde's first ablum is one of my favorite hip hop albums of all time, and this song is all kinds of awesome.   Notorious B.I.G. - Warning Let's put it to rest folks: lyrically, Biggie was always better than Tupac, and deserves more accolades than Tupac, who, let's face it, had albums filled with filler.   NWA - Straight out of Compton I still refuse to believe Ice Cube was in "Are We There Yet?" and it's sequal.   Public Enemy - Rebel Without a Pause My favorite PE song. Sure, Fear of a Black Planet may have more sonoc innovations, but lyrically, It Takes a Nation is superior.   GZA/Genius - Liquid Swords It's hard to pick a best song off of the album Liquid Swords, but here's my pick. RZA's stripped sown production is top notch, and GZA is great as always.   Beastie Boys - Shake Your Rump The best Beastie song off the best Beastie album. Slick sample ridden funk thanks to the Dust Bros., and some of the Beasties best rhymes. It's amazing that they were once good. Now they just kind of suck.   Ghostface Killah - K.I.L.O. In spite of popular opinion, I still think that Fishscale is the best solo Wu Tang album. I absolutely love this album.   Jay-Z - Nigga What Still my favorite Jay-Z song, with some awesome production (it's kinda spacey), an awesome beat, great chorus (Jay seems to have a way with choruses), and a great flow.   Snoop Dogg - Serial Killer This song always gets overlooked, IMO. The beat is incredible (Dre's early production is awesome), as well as Snoop in his prime.   Justin Warfield - B-Boys on Acid Warfield's album My Field Trip to Planet 9 is one of the most overlooked albums in 90's Hip Hop. It's a psychedelic, drug fueled, jazzy, and all around awesome album. This song captures the tone of the album perfectly.   More to come        
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Favorite Hip Hop songs part 3

Notorious BIG - Suicidal Thoughts "When I die, fuck it I wanna go to hell"   Dr. Dre/Snoop Dogg - Fuck With Dre Day I've mentioned this song before. Hip Hop amazes me in it's homophobia: It constantly attacks on homosexuals and the gay lifestyle, yet talks more about gay sex than a gay porn director.   Grand Master Flash and the Furious 5 - The Message A "favorite hio hop songs" list without this song? Fuck that.   A Tribe Called Quest - Jazz (We've Got) I really love this song. It's the group in their prime, it's one of the best examples of hip hop and jazz fusing together, and the organ kicks ass. There's some great tour stories involving these guys.   "Strictly hardcore tacks/not a New Jack Swing"   Dr. Octagon - Real Raw Dr Octagonecologyst is a great album, and this is the best song on it. It's a shame that Keith was never able to live it down (though Sex Style comes awfully close)   Mantronix - Bassline From the first (and best) Mantronix album, this is a great example of electro hip hop.   Erik B. & Rakim - Paid in Full The "7 Minutes of Madness" mix by Coldcut is even better.   LL Cool J - Rock the Bells Sure, "Momma Said" is good, but it doesn't even come close to this one.   Nas - The World is Yours Um, yeah. The best song he ever did, bar none Tell me otherwise. Come on, I dare ya.   Mobb Deep - Shook Ones Pt. II Yep, they were good once, believe it or not. I really love the piano loop.   The Roots -Silent Treatment Whether or not it's their best song is debatable, but it's a great song, and probably my favorite of theirs.   De La Soul - Say No Go While De La Soul is Dead is their best album, this is their best song.    
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

TSM Chat, other things

-Well, the TSM chat is alright. Not many people seem to show up. I really love the fact that the Jetson's theme pops up in it. I did chat briefly with Amnesia. To anyone who wants to chat over there, I'm still giving it a shot.   -I hope you folks liked that list of hip hop songs, since it won't continue. Theres more that I do love, but it would be pointless to continue it, as I was starting to get tired of it.   -So, if he doesn't care whether or not Jimmy crack corn, why the hell is he telling us?   -"Captivity" tanked, and I'm glad. I already mentioned that I'm sick of torture flicks, and I've been waiting for more worthwhile looking horror movies. There's a new "Resident Evil" movie coming out, and after the disaster that was the second one, I'm not exactly jumping for joy. Also, I'm not excited over "I Am Legend", since it's basically one of my all time favorite stories becoming a Will Smith vehicle, written by the guy who usually writes writes Will Smith movies.   -I'm growing a goatee and moustache right now. So far, it's turning out alright, though this isn't the first time I've had one. I grew a beard last year, but ended up shaving it as it itched like a mother fucker.   -Finally, the new Interpol album, Our Love To Admire is a good album but I can't help but feel disappointed in it. It just kind of sounds like the band is treading water now.   Next time: More Metal Albums I'm enjoying
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Make mine a double Texico

-Well, I went to yet another wedding reception on Saturday. Was pretty good, but that's mostly because there was an open bar. So yeah, I had a good time. The actual wedding itself was pretty short. I also couldn't get drunk, since I had to go back to my place. I'm not spending the night in some hotel in Columbus right now, I really don't know if I could afford it.   It's funny really, So many of the people I know, both friends and relatives, are settling down. I'm 24 years old, and I have yet to do so. Maybe someday.   -Michael Vick is in trouble for owning fighting dogs. Why is this worth mentioning? Because it's BARBERIC!!!   -The last Episode of "Harvey Birdman" was on Adult Swim last night. It was pretty good. I liked it more than "Morel Orel", which was just depressing. Christ, those guys had a bad childhood.   -I wish I started watching TNA more, because I saw a clip of Jay Lethal as "Black Machismo." Seriously, that is awesome. Are they still doing it? If so, I'll have to watch more.   -A Chihuahua actually caring about it's owner? You learn something new every day man.    
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

This Entry by Walt Whitman

I sometimes wonder why I talk about wrestling to some people.   Let's face it folks, the wrestling boards here (except for General Wrestling) suck, especially the WWE folder. That out of the way, not many are that much better. Hell, DVDVR has good discusions on wrestling that don't devolve into "Cena Sux lol" or other childish insults.   Seriously though, there is always going to be that guy that the IWC sees as a scapegoat. Then again, when was the last time the IWC was really happy? No matter what, they will complain. That out of the way, this is the internet. Everybody complains about something and has a scapegoat, be it AICN vs Rob Zombie, the IWC vs. Cena or HHH, and the list goes on. Nobody is ever really happy online.   Anyways, these are pre-determined wrestling matches. Has it ever come to some of your minds that maybe you are overreacting a bit. I mean, John Cena isn't the Antichrist. Sure, I don't like him being at top for so long either, but he's not the worst wrestler ever. Hell, he's actually a good worker (watch his matches with Michaels-if you didn't like those, then you just harbour a blind hatred) and seems to be a professional guy who was just forced onto the spotlight. Does he deserve all this? Maybe not, but I'm not going to through a fit over it.   What is the fucking point of having member titles like "Cena hater" or "HHHate." You don't even know these guys. For all you know, they are pretty good guys.   And why would anybody harbour such hatred for a wrestler? Doesn't that ever seem like a waste of energy?   In short, life's too short to spend that much time and energy taking a pre determined "sport" so seriously. Tat's all I have to say.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Banned in 31 Countries!

Well, the Raw ratings are doing bad as of late. Bonnie Hunter now wants "more Russo style shows" (that will be a sucess...), and Vince is having a mental breakdown behind the scenes apparently.   What's to blame for the ratings drop?   Well, this isn't exactly the boom era anymore. The "Vince is dead" storyline was cool, but let's face the facts: it would have gone on for a really long time, and would have just dragged on and on. This is the WWE we're talking about here, they have a tendancy to milk something for all it's worth until there's nothing left, and you aren't interested. Austin vs. McMahon was popular, but he's gone, and let's face it folks, you can only see Vince get humiliated by the guy so many times before your finger hits the remote.   Then there's the death of Chris "The 'How's-it-hangin'' murder" Benoit. This whole story has demoralized a buisiness not known for being upstanding and moral. Now some wrestling fans are embarressed to watch, or don't have it in them anymore after this, and those who are/were potential viewers feel that it would be wrong to do so. Even I feel uneasy watching WWE programs now.   The company does need something to strike interest again. Unfortunately, Cena isn't it. I know, I kind of defended the guy last time, but he isn't bringing in anybody. You can only see the guy overcome the odds so many times before you get tired. A shame really, as this isn't his fault as much as as it is the companies.   One thing Raw really needs is a strong heel. Edge is out, Khali is champ at Smackdow, Batista is still chasing the gold, nobody cares about Rey enough to see him as champ, and Orton, while a good heel, doesn't need to be champ. Don't give me that "at least it will get the belt off Cena" bullshit, I don't want to see Orton as Champ.   Will TNA start to generate interest? I have no idea at this point. I know I'm growing interested in the product, though you tend to hear some people say "TNA will be gone by next year" It's like The Pit: You want to give it a try, but certain guys (Kevin Nash, Russo) keep you from checking it out.   The point of this whole rant? I have no clue as to what is hurting the ratings, but bringing in "Russo like ideas" isn't going to save the day.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Youtubing

I love you tube. You love it too. Here's some videos I love.   -Excited Pug. This is the best video ever.   -My Passive-Aggressive, Obssessive-Compulsive, T-Rex Boss   -   -   Lex Luger is pissed now Predictable, but still good.   -House of Cosbys episode 2 worth it for the themesong   -BARBERIC! Movie over Ted stevens   -Cooking with Scorpion   -Dad's home   - Remember one of Czech's old avatars?  -Bernie and Ert No, I don't know either   hope ya like.    
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

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How To Vibrate
 

Simpsons movie, Lohan, Cookout

-I got to see "The Simpsons Movie" early, and yes, it is great. Reminiscent of the show in it's prime, with very few jokes/gags that fall flat, ton's of quotable lines ("I like men now!"), great animation, some good gags during the credits, Spider Pig, and much more. It's worth your money.   -I also saw "I Know Who Killed Me", and it's not as bad as some (particularly critics) are making out to be, but it's not good either. The acting is hit and miss (especially Lohan, who's performance goes from cringe worthy to pretty damn good several times), and it makes little if any sense logically. It's worth a matinee showing, or a rental on DVD. Since it tanked, I expect it to do better on DVD.   -Speaking of Lohan, I don't know what to make of her at this point. At one hand, I think she's an idiot, and should go to jail. On the other hand, I will admit it, I kinda feel bad for her.   -The "Red Band" trailer for Resident Evil: Extinction is up. I kinda liked the first one, but after the second one, I'm not holding my breath. It looks gorier than the previous ones. Oh, and yes, that is Ashanti.   -Finally, I went to a cookout recently. If you ask me, it's not a successful one unless there are these three things: Beer, Brauts, and BBQ. It didn't have the third one, but with the Beer and Brauts, it was worth it. Oh, and cheese fries. So I guess it was worth it.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Vince lives with me

-Well, in case you didn't see Raw last night (with more Regal goodnes-oh, and Santino is growing on me), Vince has been kicked out by his wife. This just gets better and better.   -This is the worst thread in a while that Vanhalen wasn't involved in. "Let's Boycott TNA!" Yeah, you and Lance "Some people actually think my opinion matters, believe it or not" Storm, and who else? Give me a fucking break.   -The Roast of Flava Flav was on last Sunday. Some thoughts:   --Bridgette Nielson should never do comedy again. --Sorry Jimmy Kimmel, not even a Chris Benoit joke makes up for your shitty performance. --Snoop Dogg and Gregg Geraldo did best. Patton Oswalt gains bonus points for referenceing "The Descent." --Chuck D looked really uncomfortable before the event. No, he didn't attend. --Carrot Top scares me.   It amuses me to see some guys over at the Wrestlecrap forums getting all bent out of shape over Kimmel's Benoit joke, which went "Even Chris Benoit is a better father than Flav." Come on, we live in times where people joke about 9/11, the Holocaust, and Slavery, yet Chris Benoit jokes offend them. Puh-leeze. If we can't joke about Benoit, then the terrorists have won.   -There's new chapters to "Trapped in the Closet" coming soon. Eh, it got boring after he left the girls house.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

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How To Vibrate
 

So much for small things...

-After watching Saturday Night's Main Event, I no longer care too much about Vince has a kid anymore. Yep, what was once corny but enoyable has now grown old fast. So much for small things...   -SuperBad is fucking awesome. Really, I haven't laughed that hard in ages. The funniest movie of the year so far, beating out Knocked Up.   I also saw Hot Rod on a Sunday Matinee, but wasn't too impressed. Sorry folks, it really didn't amuse me too much. If anything, it annoyed me.   I skipped The Invasion, since it's gotten some pretty bad word of mouth, and didn't look all that good.   -Dwarf glued penis to Hoover. I love the internet.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

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How To Vibrate
 

Movies and shit

Yep, summer's almost over, and we don't have mcuh time for movies. Here's what's coming up, and what I think.   -War- It's Jason Statham, it's Jet Li. I really hope it doesn't suck. The trailer for Saw 4, or "How can we milk this for all it's worth now?" is attatched to it.   -Right at Your Door- It's a limited release movie that comes out this week, but it's been getting some good buzz from the horror community. It involves dirty bombs apparently.   -Balls of Fury-Only razazteca is looking forward to this. Everyone else (myself included) thinks it looks terrible. Advanced word is that it's terrible. In other words, it should be terrible.   -Halloween-I'm skeptical, which doesn't usually happen to me when remakes come around. On one hand, there's really no need to remake it, and I'm sick of hearing fanboys pissing and moaning over it. On the other hand, Rob Zombie does seem like somebody who respects the source material, and he's got a hell of a cast.   -Death Sentance-The director of Saw moves away from the horror genre to do a revenge movie starring Kevin Bacon. I'll probably see it later.   -Hatchet-The online buzz for this has been deafening. If you haven't heard about it, it's a slasher movie that came to the festival circuit last year, has recieved rave reviews, and comes out in a wide theatrical release via Anchor Bay September 7th. Oh, and Kane Hodder (largely considered to be the best Jason Vorhees) plays the killer. I'm definately going to see it, especially since it's recieved comparisons to slasher movies of old ("Friday the 13th IV", "The Burning", etc.)   -3:10 To Yuma-Christian Bale and Russel Crowe in a western from the guy who directed "Walk The Line." That's all you need to know.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

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