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It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.

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How To Vibrate
 

Make mine a double Texico

-Well, I went to yet another wedding reception on Saturday. Was pretty good, but that's mostly because there was an open bar. So yeah, I had a good time. The actual wedding itself was pretty short. I also couldn't get drunk, since I had to go back to my place. I'm not spending the night in some hotel in Columbus right now, I really don't know if I could afford it.   It's funny really, So many of the people I know, both friends and relatives, are settling down. I'm 24 years old, and I have yet to do so. Maybe someday.   -Michael Vick is in trouble for owning fighting dogs. Why is this worth mentioning? Because it's BARBERIC!!!   -The last Episode of "Harvey Birdman" was on Adult Swim last night. It was pretty good. I liked it more than "Morel Orel", which was just depressing. Christ, those guys had a bad childhood.   -I wish I started watching TNA more, because I saw a clip of Jay Lethal as "Black Machismo." Seriously, that is awesome. Are they still doing it? If so, I'll have to watch more.   -A Chihuahua actually caring about it's owner? You learn something new every day man.    
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

lovecraft231 is dead

-Yep, I got a name change. Why? Because let's face it, lovecraft231 is a shitty name. Besides, gary floyd is much better. It's what makes pussy so great. It's the reason Arnold did "Commando". It's what everyone needs, and you can never have too much of it. Actually, it's the name of a Butthole Surfers song, and it never did any of those things.   -It's been a year since Katrina. What have I learned? Well, I learned that Kanye West hates Bush. I also learned more about the sheer incompetence of the current administration. Oh, and all hail Chocolate City, and it's Vanilla Suburbs.   -I'm tired of hearing about John Mark Karr. I was actually glad to hear about Tom Cruise, that's how tired I am of seeing Karr.   -wildpegasus is continuing to tard up NHB, and for some reason, I love it. I mean, it's incredibly annoying, but it's also incredibly hilarious. I think it's just the sheer pathetic aura of the man, as well as the reactions he's getting from others. Oh, and according to him, their was no hip movement.   -Check out Weird Al's Myspace to hear "Don't Download This Song". It's hilarious.   -Oblivious Heel was banned. Thank God   -Finally, thank you to KingPK, for having my name changed.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

6
How To Vibrate
 

lovecraft rates new music

Well, I'm done with my Business Writing Homework (for now at least). So, here's my picks for what I've liked, and what I didn't liked, in music so far.   What I've Liked   Ghostface Killah's Fishscale album-This sucker is the best album of the year so far. I listen to this album every week, and it just keeps getting better.   Gnarls Barkley-From what I've heard, it sounds like another future purchase for me. Plus, it's Cee-Lo and the awesome Dangermouse.   Mono's You Are There album-Another great album. I personally think this is going to be in the top post-rock albums of all time.   The Sounds-Hell yes. Fun, unpretentious rock from Sweden. Plus, it's infectious as hell.   Goldfrapp   The new Prince album.   What I Haven't Liked   The New Revolting Cocks Album-Well, I like the song "Viagra Culture" (How can you not love a song with the line "My Weiner Must Win!"), but other than that, this album is a huge let. It doesn't even sound like a Revolting Cocks album.   RHCP Stadium Arcadium-I've heard it from other people's dorms, and to be honest, I find it a bit disappointing.   Keisha Cole-I'm sick and tired of hearing the song Love, though fortunately, I don't hear it as much as I used to.   Just About Anything Emo. I really can't wait for this whole thing to end.   The Editors-I don't care what anyone says: They are not better than Interpol. Hell, I find them unsatisfactory at best   Artic Monkeys-Am I the only person who isn't creaming their pants over this band? They aren't that good.   [b]Still Waiting For[/b]   The new Current 93 album-Fortunately, it comes out really soon, so the wait won't be long.   That's all for now. Next time: Whatever else come to mind, or something
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Live Earth, Children of Men, The Fountain, Transformers movie

-Live Earth sucked. Aside from a few good performances (Roger Waters, Metallica, Crowded Houses, & Duran Duran), it was largely dull. The Police were horrible, Yellow Magic Orchestra (think Kraftwerk, only Japanese and a bit more lighthearted) were dull and their set was too short, Al Gore looked more like Darrell Hammond playing Al Gore than the actual thing, and well, it sucked.   -If you haven't seen "Children of Men" yet, go rent it. It's one of the best movies of last year, and it has an awesome soundtrack. That out of the way, avoid "The Fountain", which aside from an excellent score, is really boring and pretentious.   -Transformers is the top movie in America (bet yer suprised), and as I already mentioned, is a blast. It's amazing that out of all the huge budget blockbusters, this one is the best. "Spider Man 3" was a dissapointment, "POTC 3' is pretty much milking the franchise for all it's worth, and I'd rather stuck my nuts in a vice than watch "Shrek 3" again. Besides, "28 Weeks Later" was the best sequal of the summer so far.   -Finally, how stupid can hippies be?   In the following days, look for:   A sequal to the Metal albums thread Some of my favorite hip hop songs
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

1
How To Vibrate
 

Let's talk music, or whatever

Let's talk about some of the music coming out (or has already come out)   Kanye West-Heartbreak and 808's-If it weren't for Cryptopsy's The King Beneath, this would be the worst album of the year. It has a neat idea (old 808 drum machine beats and electro/synth pop production), but it's terrible overall. Also, I fucking hate Auto-Tune/The Vocalizer.   Metallica-Death Magnetic-Wow, they still got it. While hardly their best work, it's a step in the right direction, and almost forgives the sins of Re-Load and St. Anger. There's a few weak tracks ("Unforgiven III", "The Judas Kiss"), but not bad overall.   Darkspace-Darkspace III-Ambient Black Metal done right. A good, cold winter night outside album, with a good use of keyboards (holy shit, they actually know how to use a synth!), and some effective atmosphere. It may be a bit too long (79 minutes and 14 seconds), but if you have patience for this sort of thing, it's good. Also, if you want an equally good, but shorter, go with Coldworld's Melancolie².   Q Tip-The Renaissance-Yeah, this is the best hip hop album of the year bar none. Nobody's paying attention to it, which is a shame. "Johnny is Dead" is a great song BTW.   The Killers-Day and Age-Not as fun as Hot Fuss, but better than Sam's Town, it at least sees them remembering "hey, we're a dance band that's supposed to be disposable fun." The single suck, and Brandon Flowers still can't write lyrics for shit, but oh well. Hardly an album of the year, but not terrible either. File it under the same category as Hot Fuss-a guilty pleasure-and you got something.   Re Up Gang-Clipse Presents the Re Up Gang and We Got it For Cheap Vol. 3-The official first Re Up Gang album is pretty unspectacular, though the We Got it For Cheap Vol. 3 mixtape, while not as awesome as the last one, is awesome none the less, and a fave on my IPod.   Ad.ver.sary-Bone Music-Definately one of the most slept on albums of the year, this is the best industrial album of the year.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Let's talk about menstration

-Ever since Benoit died, I've been in the WWE folders more than I usually am.   It's true: The place is pathetic.   I haver never seen so much unbelieveably retarded behavior on a message board since I used to lurk Livejournals for laughs. From "SUCK MY COCK CUNT" to Vampiro69's lovely posts to Angle-plex saying "fuck Debra" (yeah, how dare she get beaten like that!) that thread is both the best and the worst thing I have seen in ages. No wonder I quit hanging around that hellhole. That out of the way, Czech pretty much made the best (and funniest) posts in the thread, so he gets a "best poster on TSM" notice. The guy really is my favorite poster.   -Also, Chris was apparently giving his kid steroids, and killed him with the Cripple Crossface. This whole story just keeps getting more and more fucked up.   -Out of boredom last night, I read old threads of wildpegasus being wildpegasus, and I actually wondered how he's taking the whole thing. He must be a wreck, and for some really sick reason, that amuses me. So, since I don't post on The Pit but he does, how's he taking it over there?   I can see the situation: He wanders the streets, drinking Apple Juice, while screaming out "WHYYYYYYYYY?!?!?" at the top of his lungs, as passer bys laugh at him. He enters the weightroom, and gets kicked out for bellyaching. He even thinks of hiring a hooker to ease the pain, but changes his mind when memories of his cousin return. He then goes on to masturbate to his posters of Bret Hart and Astoboy, and then cries himself to sleep.   Meanwhile, his parents are happy, as they see this as leading to his possible death, meaning they won't have to put up with him anymore.   Mean spirited? You bet, but pretty likely.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

4
How To Vibrate
 

Let's Scare Jessica To Death (Day 18)

18.) Let's Scare Jessica To Death (1971)

Plot: Jessica (Zohra Lampert) is let out of a mental ward, and moves into a country home with friends. So, what's with the strange drifer girl (Gretchen Corbett)? Or the vampire in the lake? Or the townspeople with those odd scars?

Review: The term "lost classic" gets thrown around a lot, especially in the horror genre. Hardcore fans such as yours truly love to mention movies like Vampyr, Horrors Of Malformed Men, The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh, and others as examples of why we should continue to dig for great but overlooked horror movies. One movie that gets thrown around by such fans is John Hancock's 1971 classic "Let's Scare Jessica To Death."

The movie itself is not a gorefest-bloodshed is quite limited within the movie-but what it lacks in disembowelments it makes up for in creeping dread and atmosphere. Throughout most of the movie, we are unsure what is real or what is a dream, as Jessica's paranoia reaches a fever pitch level, and the atmosphere clouds over the viewer, up to the conclusion. The dead in the movie are not rotting corpses bent on destruction, but are instead undead townspeople who you can't trust, bringing to mind the classic Invasion of the Body Snatchers.

Also, just like Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things, Messiah Of Evil, and I Drink Your Blood, "Jessica" serves and a condemnation of hippie culture-and may be the biggest middle finger-the biggest proverbial fuck you-to the culture, as it reveals many of the things that destroyed it, and it wasn't authority figures either: bickering, in fighting, egos, the looming sense of comformity, acid drenched delusions, paranoia, and more figure into the movie. The overriding message of the film seems to be that even without authority and police figures, the hippie movement was doomed to fail from the get go-only it would end up destroying itself instead of the other way around.

"Let's Scare Jessica To Death" is a great horror movie, and deserves it's cult reputation.

Rating: 9/10 One of the best horror movies from the 70's you haven't seen or heard of. Recommended.

Next Time: Erotic Nights of the Living Dead
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Lenna's reign has ended.

May 29th, 2007: Leena's reign of terror ends.   I'm suprised this happened, to be honest. Sure, she's been banned before (and will probably return) but I'm suprised she lasted this long. She was a pain in the ass, and nobody but Matt Young liked her. She was a female version of MikeSC, only occasionaly funny, and also prone to start arguments. She also was incredibly insecure, with no known "friends" outside of myspace and this forum (some poeple actually liked her...God knows why.) She posted pictures of shit in WP threads, which was still less upsetting than WP. She pissed off Carlito Brigante, which was always funny.   And now she's gone.   I personally won't miss her. I stopped caring about her a long time ago. I did defend her once, but that was just to get to Oblivious Heel (who was that anyways?) So anything about her stopped interesting me.   So yeah, good riddence, or good bye, I guess.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

5
How To Vibrate
 

Kobe, How Does My Ass Taste (NSFW)

"Kobe, how does my ass taste?"       That was the question Shaq asked Kobe as his rival's tongue went to work on his soiled sphincter. It was sturdy to say the least, hungrily lapping up everything it could, and not ignoring a single part of the rancid poop shoot. He just dug deeper, practically munching away as he felt some solid waste exit the putrid black hole.   "GOD DAMNIT!" Shaq yelled orgasmically, jerking his large member as pre cum soaked his knuckles. Kobe was incredible at this-it was his specialty. He did it to Steve Nash earlier that week, and he had plans for Joe Crawford later on.   Shaq's finger's gripped the swollen member. It felt like a firehose ready to go off at any second, yet the Phoenix Sun was able to hold it off-even at the sight of Kobe wildly eating out his shit stained shitter, feces dribbling from his chin like a grotesque milkshake, all while caressing his own member with extreme force.   Nothing lasts forever though, and by the power of Shaq-Fu, Shaq's rectum fired liquid cannon into Kobe's gullet, soaking his face and mouth with diarrhea as Kobe ejaculated a fire hydrant like load into Shaq's gaping maul.   Looking deep into each other's eyes, the two shared a French kiss, semen and feces mingling into each other's mouth to create something not even the Fu-Schnickens would consume. "Delicious" Kobe replied.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Kerry is a fucking idiot

-To John Kerry: Godamnit. I don't care if it was a botched joke, you really fucked up. Quit being high and mighty over it ("oh, it's all part of the Republicans trying to make us look bad") and fess up. Unfortunately, this will probably fuck things up, and make it that thr Republicans are still in office (remember folks, while I may rip on the republicans and tend to lean left, I'm still not a Democrat), so fuck you John Kerry, and thanks for nothing.   -Leena's getting shitloads of attention in the Chocolate Socket (I really think we need to change the name), and getting in arguments. Also, snuffbox insulted me (which I find amusing), and Cheesala congradulated me (whcih creeps me out). Anywho, I wonder how much longer this will go on.   -I've got another exam in a week, and one more in two weeks, so wish me luck bastards.   -I can't wait for the elections to end, mostly because I'm tired of seeing attack ads every time I watch TV.    
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Junk (Day 12)

12.) Junk (2000)

Plot: A team of petty Jewel thieves find themselves fighting for their lives when the factory they are in turns out to be infested with zombies-including a hot naked chick.

Review: Take one part Tarantino knock off, one part Re-Animator, one part Return of the Living Dead 3, and three parts Italian zombie movie, and you get "Junk"- a derivative, unoriginal, but really fun zombie movie that plays like the best one Italy never made-only it's from Japan.

The movie borrows liberally from from a variety of movies (the ones mentioned above, as well as Day of the Dead, Bruno Mattei's so bad it's brilliant Hell of the Living Dead, and a few others), yet somehow, it ends up being a blast. The gore is great and plentiful (including quite an original scene where a zombie consumes it's own flesh), as the undead eat human flesh with relish, and people shoot, stab, electrocute, etc. them with gusto. Oh, and there's a hot naked zombie chick (well, she's naked most of the time-when she's not, she's in tight leather) with big tits whose also smarter, faster, and smarter than the other zombies in the movie.

While the movie is unoriginal and derivative, that fact is never distracting. What is distracting though, is the English speaking/American actors, who are so bad, it's painful. I'm talking bad local theater production levels bad. You'll cringe whenever they appear on screen.

Still, "Junk" is a blast of mindless cheesy fun, and is a perfect "pack of beer with friends" movie.

Rating: 7.5/10 Derivative nature and poor acting aside, "Junk" is still a a lot of fun, though it doesn't have much on the mind.

Next Time: The Child
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

It's torture!

The torture horror genre is dead. Well almost dead. Thank God.   I liked "Hostel" and it's sequal, in spite of what others have said. I liked the first "Saw" movie. That out of the way, with "Hostel Part II" tanking (and director Eli Roth posting an incredibly whiney entry in his Myspace), and inspite of the movie "Captivity" coming out, people aren't largely going to see people get tortured anymore. Ok, so there's another "Saw" movie, but that's beyond the point.   I think that people are tired of being bombarded with torture flick after torture flick. Hell, Roth has even seemed to have moved beyond the tired subgenre he helped give birth to, and is going on to do an adaptation of Stephen King's "Cell" as his next movie. The director of "Saw" went on to do the dreadful "Dead Silence", which at least saw him try something different. The director of the excellent slasher flick "High Tension" and the remake of "The Hills Have Eyes" is moving on to more creepy supernatural scare. And "28 Weeks" later not only showed that R rated horror can still do good box office, but can still be scary. Several R Rated horror films have proven that you can be scary without endless torture sequences. The problem: They haven't done good box office.   In a way, because of movies like "Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning" and their ilk, R-Rated horror has gotten a bad buzz. Critics now use the tired phrase "torture porn" to describe such movies (really folks, torture porn is the kind of thing you find in Sweeden), and the movie going public has tired of torture. Unfortunately, this has spoiled things for other horror flicks, meaning that much better and more imaginative horror flicks either do poor box office ("Grindhouse", "The Abandoned", "Slither") get limited release ("Black Sheep", "Fido"), or get dumped straight to video ("Gravedancers", "Reincarnation", "Isolation")   People want to be scared again. They don't want to see Elisha Cuthbert get tortured by a deranged maniac. They don't want to see a woman get raped by a mutant. They want to be frightened, not put through an ordeal.   My answer to those who complain about movies that use torture: don't watch them, and they'll go away. Go see original horror movies that deserve respect and attention, like "The Descent" or "The Abandoned."   Horror isn't going to die, it's just at a crossroads. That's ok, because this always happens. The same thing happened with slasher movies in the 80's and self aware horror in the 90's. The next big thing will come eventually, and it will go, only to make way for the new one.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

It's the Return of the Great Whitey Hope

Anyways, been a while.   So far, Wrestlemania looks like it will be shit. Normally, I order it evey year, so this looks like the first time I won't be ordering one. Here is a list of things that are most likely better than Wrestlemania will be:   Metallica's "St. Anger" Date Movie (that's right, fucking Date Movie looks better than Wrestlemania.) A movie from Uwe Boll See No Evil (I've seen the poster for it online. It has a new shitty tagline: "Evil Gets Raw") A porno from Rob Black A post from Desperate Housewife Gimmick Posters Goldberg vs. Lesner Getting a tattoo that says something retarded   Feel free to add to the list.   Also, I really dig Venetian Snares. Nothing else to add, I just really dig the guys work.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

Inuyasha aka CronoT aka Cronoyasha is back.

NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...     ...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...   ...Ok, I'm done. Wait a minute...   ...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   Now I'm done.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

1
How To Vibrate
 

In defense of Vitamin X

Why? Well, look at this glorious thread.   Long story short: Vitamin X banned Marney. He did this after simply warning her (not a big deal really), and she flipped, acting like a spoiled bitch. She insulted him constantly (as well as AnnieEclectic for being a Transexual), and pretty much dared him to ban her.   So he did.   Afterwards, people bitched at him, telling him that Marney didn't deserve to be banned. These people included Rant and bob barron (who tends to bitch a lot.)   Quit fooling yourselves. She deserved to be banned. I have no problem with different opinions, but she basically acted belligerent, insulting those who disagreed with her, and blatantly spewing hateful, racist, homophobic (amusing, considering she's a lesbian) bullshit. She refused to follow the rules, and had to act like an internet tough guy, puffing her chest, thinking "nobody can ban me!" Hell, she pretty much asked to be banned, and her wish got granted.   Why did she do this? Here's my theory: just like MikeSC and others at The Pit, she feels wronged for no reason. So, in her feeble mind, she's proven a point. What point she proved is beyond me, and it only exists in her twisted psyche. In reality, all she proved is that she's a cunt, and her being banned had nothing to do with her being a conservative, a woman, or a lesbian-it all has to do with her behavior.   Seriously, why can't people like her, Leena, and MikeSC realize this? The board is not out to get them. Hell, from what I've seen, The Pit seems to obsess over us more than we do them. Most of us don't give a shit about that place. When you refuse to follow the rules, troll, insult those you don't agree with, and start pointless arguments, you will be banned. Why is it that some can't realize this? Are they fucking stupid?   In short, Vitamin X did the right thing. Marney should have been banned from the get go, and stop kidding yourself if you think otherwise.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

4
How To Vibrate
 

I'm tired of Zombie Movies

-To EvanderHollyfieldsMissingEar: I never said that you have never encountered racism. I just think that you are seriously overreacting to Rant saying "nigga"   -I am officially tired of zombie movies. Sure, there's been some great ones (Land of the Dead, Shaun of the Dead, Versus, Wild Zero), and some good ones (Junk, Stacy, Dead Meat, Choking Hazard, Plaga Zombie: Zona Mutante, Undead), but as of late, I have been bobarded with an insane amount of shitty zombiie movies. After seeing the likes of "Dead Life", "Zombie Night", "The Wickeds", "Dead Men Walking", "Zombiez", "Hood of the Living Dead", "Storm of the Dead", "After Sundown", and etc. I have officially grown tired of zombie movies. I mean come on, anybody can do a zombie movie, it's just that not everybody can do a zombie movie right.   It takes more than knocking off Lucio Fulci or George Romero to make a good zombie movie. It takes more than a whole lot of gore effects and zombie make up to make a good zombie movie. You need interesting elements, halfway decent acting, and more than a handheld camera to make a good zombie movie. Good zombie movies are not some bullshit that has been shot on video that rips the story off of either "Night of the Living Dead", "Return of the Living Dead", "Evil Dead", or "Zombi 2". And for God's sake, quit stealing scenes from those movies. It's not "paying tribute", it's being low on ideas.   Then again, this has been a problem since the 80's. "Dawn of the Dead" came out, and then "Zombi 2" came out. Then we got a spring of zombie movies. Some great (Re-Animator, Day of the Dead, Return of the Living Dead, Dead and Buried, Night of the Creeps) some good (Night of the Comet, Death Warmed Up, One Dark Night, Dead Pit), and some really bad ones (Neon Maniacs, Zombie Brigade, Night of the Zombies, Chillers). Then came the sov zombie movies, in which teenagers and college kids with no clue on how to make a good movie, made zombie movies. This trend unfortunately continues today.   The point is this: Enough with the zombie movies. Unless you actually have some talent, then movies like "Severed" and their ilk will continue to be made. Untill then, I am sick of zombies, and will continue to be until some good ones are made.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

I'm Done For Now

I can't post here, at least not for a while. Why? It's a long story. I'll be other places (The Pit) for now at least. I'll miss the place.         *Bows. Walks off.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

I'm doing alright

Well, had my first a few days ago. So far, it looks like things are doing fine, albeit a bit uneventful. More classes tomorrow, so there ya go.   Dread Central gave 4 1/2 out of 5 Bloodmugs to the upcoming Master's of Horror episode "Fair Haired Child." Remember, it's on Friday at 10 on Showtime, with repeats throughout the weekend. Also, remember that Eli Roth's "Hostel" comes to theatres on Friday. Oh, and it includes the trailer to the WWE's horror movie "See No Evil". I agree with other people when they said it would have been awesome if Kane played an evil Ice Cream Man, but that role's been done by God's second son (aka Clint Howard).   Finally, for those wondering why this blog is called "The Crackdown", here is the answer: It's named after a Cabaret Voltaire album.   There ya go for now
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

0
How To Vibrate
 

I'm back, 32-30

-Well, kkktookmybabyaway told me to update my blog, so I am. He also says that C-Bacon is somehow responsible for helping me get it back online. For that I say: I know I rip on you alot, but thanks. I won't apolagize to you, but thanks a lot. For that, I'll leave you alone and put you off ignore...for a while.   Also, I turned 24 last week, I've got a lot of homework, and that's about it. Anyways, back to the countdown to the worst albums of all time.   32.) Burzum-Daudi Baldrs I always hated this band. I got in an arguement with Tack over them. I downloaded this once, and it sucked (as expected). The story behind this album: Varg Vikernes, apart from having a one man metal project named Burzum, was also a (brief) member of legendary Black Metal band Mayhem. At some point, he killed one of the band members, and was arrested by the police. When they searched his house, they found several explosives, as well as the fact that he's a Neo-Nazi and a church burner. While in jail, he couldn't afford guitars, bass, or drums anymore, and also decided to give up the instruments because they are "Black." He changed his style of music to make music that is more in tune with being Aryan-making shitty music on a casio keyboard (again all he could afford) made in Japan that sounds like a teenager trying to make symphonic music on a casio keyboard. Oh, and he didn't record this as a joke. That's right, he was seriously trying to make an artistic statement by recording with a cheap casio keyboard. That's all you need to know.   31.) Ministry-Filth Pig After Psalm 69, you'd think that the follow up would be incredible. Think again. This sounds like a Al Jourgenson and co. decided to record a Black Sabbath tribute with samples and drum machines. It's a lazy affair, devoid of any memorable moments (save for "Reload" and "The Fall"), and a horrible cover of Bob Dylan's "Lay Lady, Lay." This album was also recorded while Al was deep into heroin addiction, so if any album should be proof enough that heroin is bad, this is one of them.   30.) The Happy Mondays-Yes, Please Another band that I never liked, the Happy Mondays were a dance-rock band from the 80's-90's who were fueled on E and just dull. Their last album though, is just shitty. There's no interesting moments (unlike on say, Thrills, Pills, and Bellyaches, which at least had it's moments in songs like "Kinky Afro" and "Step On"), the lyrics are incredibly cringe inducing, and sounds too much like it's trying to keep up with then current trends (again with trying to stay with the times). The band got back together recently, and has a new album on the way, but I doubt it will be as bad as this one.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

3
How To Vibrate
 

I'm a Fister

Recently on a radio show interview, Anne Coulter attacked liberals, and for some reason, mentioned anal sex and fisting. Well, in honor of that. here's a song just for you folks   I fist the old brown eye and I'm proud I use to feel alone in a crowd But now you look around these days And it seems theres anal fisting CRAZE I'm a fister he's a fister she's a fister we're fister Wouldn't you like to be a fister too? I'm a fisterer he's a fister she's a fister If you aim for the stink wrinkle you're a fister too! Us fisters are an interesting breed A good old stinkhole is all we need Ask any fister and they'll say "only fisting feels that way" I'm a fister he's a fister she's a fister we're a fister wouldn't you like to be a fister too? I'm a fisterer he's a fister she's a fister we're a fister wouldn't you like to be a fister too?
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

1
How To Vibrate
 

I'll shit the fuck up all over your face.

This entry is dedicated Hotbutter Spoonbuster, aka "TSM's answer to Tourettes Guy".   -Been a busy week, and I'm fucking tired. I haven't had a good night's sleep in a while now.   -I saw the piolet for "Korgoth of Barbaria" on Adult Swim last night, and it it's awesome. It's on again at 10:30 tonight, and I recommend it. Also, the new season of "The Venture Brothers" debuts June 25th.   -The "9/11 Conspiracy Theories" thread on the CE folder is a great big pile of stupid. That's all I have to say about that.   -Finally, my thoughts on Hotbutter Spoonbuster: This guy rules. I don't thinl he has any idea what he's saying, and he spews forth insults and profanity like he's internet celebrity Tourettes Guy. So here's to you HBSB: Don't you ever change.    
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

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