Phil Hendrie has announced on his blog that he is returning to radio on June 25th. He has signed a deal with talk radio network FM. I haven't heard anything on how many/what stations he'll be on, but he'll certainly be syndicated. TRN has AM stations and I guess the FM is a new thing.
I also have no idea what kind of show this will be. When he ended his radio show last year he said he was finished with not only radio but with the type of show he did (character-based satire). He said he was moving on to TV and movies (so much for that). Will he resurrect his old characters? My opinion is no. I'm betting that he will do commentary/politics infused with some satire. His blog has been nothing but politics with the occasional satire piece. He won't take callers--he hates talk radio callers. They are the very people he ridiculed and generally messed with on his old show. No, he'll try to invent some new type of talk show without callers and without his old characters.
The coronation of LeBron James as the next MJ was consumated last night during a fourth quarter performance that ranks among the best pro athlete performances in history. (BTW Rome continues to have egg on his face for declaring that James is no MJ after game one.) Now, I'm basing this on descriptions by my local sports radio hosts, one of whom saw it live in Detroit, and by Mike Tirico, who I heard say "this is the best thing I've ever seen".
The reason I have to rely on outside descriptions is because I, in a monumental act of stupidity, turned the game off with about 8 minutes to go in the fourth quarter. This was right at the time when James took over the game, playing one on five and winning. So I missed one of the great sports moments in history. I just hope ESPN classic replays tonight.
A Nike poster of English soccer star Wayne Rooney has inspired outrage and condemnation among some dipshits in England. And in America as well I'm sure. There are three reasons for the outrage: 1) the red paint and expression on his face promotes violence and aggression, 2) the configuration of the paint, in the form of England's flag, recalls a cross, with Rooney as the crucified Jesus, and 3) the form of the cross also recalls the familiar vest/clothing of the Crusades, which is offensive to Muslims.
Sweet living Jesus in a soda can, get a life people. A friend of mine was watching an England World Cup match and saw fans dressed in Crusader outfits. He immediately thought of Monty Python--I said no, that's a Crusader costume and if someone did that in America, CAIR and the ACLU would go apeshit. He said nah, it wouldn't be a big deal. This poster incident is a perfect example of the hysterical reaction to these kinds of things. And Christians don't get a free pass either--some are condemning it as offensive to God. Get a grip people.
There are plans to make another Star Trek film, going back to the era of Kirk and Spock, in an attempt to reinvigorate the franchise. This is, of course, the only way to bring back the magic of Star Trek and, if done correctly, will once again inject Trek into Pop Culture. However, this path is frought with dangers--dangers of serious movie-suckiness.
The problem is simple. William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy ARE Kirk and Spock. Period. It will be very, very difficult to find 2 actors to take over the role--even if the film is set during their younger years. This problem can be demonstrated by taking a look at an attempt at a prequel from 1979. This prequel was called Butch and Sundance: the Early Days. Of course, it was trying to capture the greatness of the 1969 classic starring Paul Newman and Robert Redford. The 2 actors chosen were Tom Berenger and William Katt. Berenger you should be familiar with--Katt starred in the TV show "Greatest American Hero" in the 80s. It was a disaster because Berenger and Katt were just poor imitations of Newman and Redford. It's not really an insult to them, they just aren't Newman and Redford.
I'm still all for the idea, I just have reservations. As long as the right people are trusted with doing it, it may turn out OK.
Then again, look at Ghostbusters II and those 3 Star Wars prequels...
Update:
I just saw a news report where JJ Abrams is denying some of the earlier reports about a proposed Star Trek film. He also says it will not feature the characters Kirk or Spock. Well. I guess never mind.
There was a show on in the late 70s/early 80s called "That's Incredible". It featured people from around the world who did strange things, like had 5 inch fingernails or something, or who performed some kind of stunt. It was hosted by John Davidson and some chick with the last name Crosby or something.
Now I was a young teenager taking all this in and I remember a couple of people from the show. One guy from India, the full Hindoo deal, was on and he was referred to as the "Yogi ----", I don't remember the second part. This guy was over 6 feet tall and would contort and twist himself into this little clear plexiglass box that was something like 3 ft by 3 ft. They even put a lid on the box. He wore nothing but those diaper looking things and this guy was a TV cult hero for a brief period.
This other guy was a specialist at jumping over cars as they drove toward him. Hey, don't ask me, this is what passed for talent back in the day. This guy would stand in the road and a car would be driven at a specified speed directly towards him. He would get a running start and leap up, letting the car speed under him and then he would land safely. One time he did hit his foot on the upper part of the windshield, that was the only time I saw him screw up. The car was a Ferrari 308 (the Magnum PI Ferrari). I always wondered what became of these two guys. I can't imagine where your career goes after jumping over cars on TV or squeezing into a little box.
I recently fixed up a old 10-speed bike. I got nice cushy handle bar wraps, a new gel seat cover, new tires, special bike chain lubricant/cleaner, and even got a new chain thing on the back wheel, the one with the french name that controls the "speed" changes (I was expecting that to be expensive, but it was only 13 bucks). Now, I'll ride the thing around my neighborhood, which luckily is a pretty large area of winding streets, but I aint taking it out on the actual roadways. I know how drivers react to bikers and I'm not going anywhere near them. 99% of drivers see a biker on the road and they go into full adversarial mode. They get angry--how dare this guy get in my way! I'll admit to getting impatient and a bit teed off when I have to slow to 10mph, waiting to get around a biker.
GM and Ford's recent fiscal year has been horrible. GM alone LOST something like 4 billion dollars. Yet I'm happy because they are building powerful muscle cars that harken back to the high-horsepower heydey of the 1960s and early 1970s. Rear wheel drive cars with torquey V8s and prominent badging. A car guy's dream.
Now, it's true we have had 2 American cars that have been holding the fort for a while, but they were the only two. Of course I'm talking about the Corvette and the Viper. But those 2 were for the upscale set. A true muscle car should be available to the masses, a real blue-collar type. Recently things have picked up, starting with the retro stylings of the Mustang, and continuing with three new cars.
Dodge Charger. Well, they screwed this up, it could be argued, by giving the car four doors. To be a proper muscle car, it should have 2 doors, but I wouldn't mind owning one. The R/T had a Hemi and something on the order of 325 bhp. Now they have the Charger SRT8, 6.1 Hemi with 425 bhp and Ram Air hood. Kick ass.
Dodge Challenger. One of the great monikers from the muscle car era. A late comer, but very popular. A properly restored 1970 Hemi R/T Challenger will go for around 1 million dollars at auction. (A Hemi 'Cuda convertible sold for 2 million dollars a few months ago). This car is going to be simply awesome. It will have a Hemi of course, retro styling, and some nifty gadgetry like on-board telemetry.
Chevrolet Camaro. The Camaro is coming back after being killed off by GM in 2002. News of its demise was greatly exaggerated. Also sporting the retro styling craze, the design channels the famous 1969 Camaro, one of the most popular Camaros ever. With the comeback of the Camaro, we'll see if mullets and hair bands are far behind.
While the gasoline is coursing through my veins, I'll talk about the incredible Bugatti Veyron in my next post.
I'm listening to 700 WLW in Cincinnati (Mike McConnell show) and their phone systems are completely down. They cannot take calls. So Mike (or one of his producers) decides to have people email to Mike's on-air address with their phone number and they will call them and put them on the air. The first guy they tried it with sounded pretty bad, but, hey I love this. I've never heard of this being done before. At least they're trying to keep the callers/fans happy.
I'm tempted to try it, but I don't think my boss would cotton to it. Then again, that recent court ruling allowing workers to surf the net may give me an out. Apparently talking on the phone and reading the newspaper are similar to web surfing while at work, so I guess I can talk with Mike on company time.
Just got back from the Dentist where I was informed that I need to go back on 3 month visits in order to maintain my peridontal crap. That's when your gums recede. Fuck. Not that I care about going more often, but I will have to pay more due to more visits that the insurance will not cover.
Dentistry has to be the best gig out there. Everybody's got a set of teeth.
My friend Brad (a Pharmacist) has purposefully not gone to a dentist in many years. He insists he can take perfectly good care of his teeth himself. He rinses with Vodka, claiming it kills germs more effectively than the various mouthwashes available. I'm not kidding at all. I guess he's doing an ok job, I never known him to have any cavities.
Michelle Wie is attempting to qualify for the U.S. Open. I'm hearing many voices of idiocy from people who should know better. People are saying she shouldn't be allowed to do this, just stay on the LPGA, etc. Shut up, you dumbfucks. She's playing from the same tees. Everything is equal. The PGA is not a men only organization. Whoever you are, if you are good enough to play under the same rules as everyone else, you should be allowed to compete. If this were some bogus thing like having her play from separate tees, yes, screw that. But that's not the case here. Oh yeah, she's kinda hot, but I will not comment any further until she turns 18.
Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chris Henry was arrested YET AGAIN a couple days ago. This time DUI and speeding. He just got through a court hearing for a separate arrest while in Florida. It's hard to figure how someone could be so damn dumb. But the Bengals should keep him, because in the Pros it's about winning and nothing else. If they cut him, someone else will pick him up and he could come back to haunt the Bengals down the road. Last I checked the Ravens had 2 star players get prison time, or at least were found guilty of some crime. Who cares, this aint high school. The Steelers new draft pick, Santonio Holmes recently got into trouble. But they'd do well to keep him because he'll help them win games. I hear guys on the radio saying "cut that creep Henry, we don't need that kind of player on our team". Oh really? You want a bunch of saints on your team and go .500? Can you imagine the shit the dudes back in the 70s did off the field in the NFL? Holy Christ, it'd make your hair turn white. This is the Pros baby, deal with it.
The French Open was NOT broadcast in HD on NBC over the weekend. I hate you, NBC...unless it was out of their control. I think they just use the French TV feed for their broadcast, so maybe they were unable to show it in HD. I'm still pissed though. And it looks like Martina Hingis is advancing nicely. The occasional skirt fly-up is the real reason I want the HD. Hingis appears to have really gotten into great shape. At least I'm honest.
Muslims terrorists--some Canadian citizens--were captured in Ontario. They were planning bomb attacks in Ontario. During the same week, the Ontario division of the largest trade union in Canada was calling for a boycott against Israel for mistreatment against Palestinians. Man, that is divine irony.
I watched Rob Zombie's "House of 1000 Corpses" over the weekend on the Independent Film Channel. Wow, what a mess. And talk about ripping off Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Oh, I guess the part where one of the killers uses the facial skin of one of his victims as a mask--just like Leatherface--was supposed to be a homage. Well, it was one clumsily done homage, I'd call it a rip-off any day.
And I've heard plenty about the sequel, "Devil's Rejects". And this leads me to the conclusion that Zombie is one gutless wonder. Sure, he has his killers torture and kill normal white people--in the case of "Reject's" an overtly Christian family is tortured and put to death. Zombie doesn't show any blacks or other minority group as victims. Nor do you see a Muslim family tied up and tortured. Zombie would not want to appear bigoted I'm sure and I guarantee he doesn't want to piss off Muslims. But cruelty against Christians is fun!
Recently kkktookmybabyaway talked about turning 30. Yes, being in your 30s is a real shock if you were someone who was very active in their 20s. In my 30s, things began to hurt, ache and generally be sore that never were before after normal physical activity. I played a lot of tennis and golf in my teens and 20s. In my 30s, my shoulder would be killing me after a game of tennis, where that never happened before. And of course the "legs go". I remember when I took classes at Cincinnati State in my 30s. There was a huge hill with steps that you had to climb to get to the building. When I got to the top, I was a physical wreck and my legs, specifically the thigh muscles, were killing me. And it wasn't that bad really. I could've jogged up the steps easily at 25. Whenever I hear of a pro athlete who is just past his prime and has made some type of comeback and says "I'm in the best shape of my life" I just laugh. Sure you are.
Yeah, I'm really looking forward to my 40s.
I just wish these egghead scientists would perfect this whole nanotechnology thing. Molecular sized robots roaming around in your body, keeping your cells in pristine condition, all your muscles and organs in perfect health, forever. Let's get going, boys, staying young forever is a concept whose time has come.
There will be an open auction in France in September to sell off parts of the famous Concord airplane. I'm sure 99.9% of the parts will be out of my price range, but I'd love to get my hands on an emblem or maybe something from the instrument panel. Of course, I won't be in France in September, so this post is very rapidly becoming irrelevant. Yes, in fact it was irrelevant after the first word was typed, but there you go.
And, in an attempt to rescue this post, here's a creepy anecdote regarding the Concord, or rather, the Russian version:
Russia was developing its own version of the Concord the same time as France, known as "Concordia" (very original Russia). An early prototype crashed in a populated area and a part of the plane which had sheered off decapitated a child playing in his yard about a mile away from the crash. I wonder what that part would bring at auction?
I've been listening to Dennis Miller's new radio show. It's very entertaining. He does not get in-depth into topics the way that a Rush or Boortz would and he always has 2 guests per hour. I think he's just trying to feel his way through the beginning here, not wanting to do too much monolouge stuff. But the jokes he gets off are classic and hilarious. He of course works in the world of the simile, and they come hard and fast, like a 10-cup-a-day coffee drinker working a gatling gun. I would put the url to his site, but my workplace computer is denying me access due to a filter. This filter is very hit and miss, as evidenced by my ability to post this blog entry right now. In fact it's probably watching my every keystroke....
Donald Trump is now selling steaks through the mail--kind of like the Omaha Steaks that you can order. In what is certain to be a very good deal, Trump will send you what he calls the greatest steaks in the world. Now, I--oh wait, I just saw the prices--hmm, $999 sounds reasonable for 16 steaks and 24 burgers. Or you can really save a lot of money and get the Classic Collection. The CC features 4 steaks and 12 burgers for $199. Forget Biggs, I'm going exclusively with Trump from now on to meet my meat needs.
George Lucas thinks that Spiderman 3 is "silly" Um, yeah, George, you did alright with those first 3 movies, but a lot of people agree that your next 3 attempts fell a little short. In fact one could make the case they appeal more to the grade school set than the adult world.
Bookstores tend to attract a certain kind of person. These kooks are intelligent, but are social misfits and are just plain weird. I worked at a large Barnes and Noble in Cincinnati, in an up-scale part of town.
The cafe was a hotbed of nutjobs. This one guy was pretty much a clinical OCD. He would come in at the exact same time every day, grab the same newspaper, order the same specialty coffee drink in a tall glass mug, and sit at the same table alone. Another guy came in around 4 or 5pm and would stay until closing at 11pm. This routine would go on for weeks and weeks continously, every day. He would bring a spread of notepads, claiming he was writing a sci-fi novel.
One guy would wander around the store, picking books at random, althought often his "random" picks included large, full-color books from our Sexuality section. He would park himself in one of our large comfortable chairs and talk to himself loudly, flipping through the books. He would leave them splayed open for all to see.
People would call to place books on hold and come later to pick them up. Often these people would call one location and then show up at ours looking for their book. Some would get quite upset when we didn't have their book. When we called around and found their book at another location, they usually just slinked off, mumbling an apology. Once, this one guy was really giving it to us, I mean calling us the scum of the earth for not having his book. He was one of these "I'm better than you and you'd better start kissing me feet right now." We of course found it at another location. I took great glee in keeping a stone face and telling him that he had called a different store and that they had his book on hold, just like he asked. He acquired a dumb look on his face and just left, not saying a word. Dick.
Some people would steal from us. Yes, hard to believe I know. This one guy really went the extra mile to try and get away with it. He stole a lot of expensive books. I can proudly say that I was the one who figured out what he was doing, and finally identified him as the thief. We could order any book in print and we had a computer system to place orders. This guy would order a $50-$100 book using several different made up names. He would then come to the counter and ask to see his book. He would then wander off to some corner of the store, stuff it down his pants or some such thing, and boogie out the door, unnoticed. I started tracking the books that were missing and connecting them all to these names that I recognized as people in the media. Robert Novak was one name he used. Then I found a missing book where he actually used his real name. Gotcha, sucka. Yeah, I know, real junior G-man stuff.
Alright, we all know most Liberals and the Left consider President Bush to be a radical Conservative, a real hard-line type. But now there is a recent development where you have hardcore Conservatives calling the president a Liberal, complaining about policies they feel are a betrayal of the Conservatives that voted him into office.
One of these two groups is dead wrong. Which one? Is Bush a moderate you might wonder.
Take immigration. The Left thinks he is a bigoted Conservative who wants to oppress the minorities. The newly-annoyed Right thinks he is a sellout to Liberals because he wants to explore the amnesty option and isn't doing enough to enforce strict border control.
Religion. The Left thinks he is a dangerous religious fanatic who wants to form government policy based on fundamentalist Christianity. The others think he is selling out his religious values and his religious base by, for example, allowing private stem cell research.
Economy. The Left thinks he is a "fat cat" type who wants to cater to the rich, while stepping on the throats of the poor. The others think his economic policy is a sellout to the Liberals, what with all the spending.
One of the most vehement Conservative public voices against the president is radio talk show host Michael Savage. Savage feels Bush is a Liberal and even goes so far to say he should be impeached (I think his reason was something to do with locking out certain Conservative Senators from some important meeting). He recently said that Bush is the worst president in U.S. history. He pointed to Bush 41 and Clinton doing the fund raising gig together as a sign that the Bushes aren't really Conservative.
What the frak? Oh I know, both sides are weirder than catshit and should go straight to Hell, 5th Ring, first Pit on the left.
A normally reasonable and level-headed local talk show host in Cincinnati, Mike MCconnell, put his foot in his mouth this morning. He was railing against various news headlines that read basically "Putin surprises Bush with offer", (about a alternate site in Europe for the missile defense shield that Putin has been angry over). Mike was claiming that was misleading and that it was actually Bush's idea, not Putin's. Well, I looked into the story and it WAS Putin's idea, based on what I read in the articles shown below.
I emailed his show (he's read my emails on the air before) but so far he hasn't addressed the issue. I pretty sure he won't return to the topic to correct himself--it was too large a gaffe to admit to. Most listeners will never know he was wrong. I'm guessing this is how hosts deal with a situation when they go out on a limb on an issue and they're wrong--IGNORE IT.
sfgate article:
From the caycompass (Ap story):
24 has been very good in previous seasons. This season it is terrible.
Lost has jumped the shark, really sometime last season.
Heroes jumped the shark on about episode two or three.
First, 24:
1. The writing this season is amateurish. The dialogue is horrible. It is filled with loads and loads of exposition. Maybe the show's producers have received complaints from viewers that are having difficulty following the storyline. Whatever the reason, the whole thing comes across as a show for 9 year olds.
2. Absurb, implausible goings-on. I'm not talking about Jack getting across LA freeways in 3 and a half minutes--the show has always had over the top storylines and that's OK. I'm talking about little things such as: Jack's brother being left alone with his father. There is no way Jack's brother would be left alone in a room with the IV still attached to his arm, let alone with another person present, even his own father. And the repetitive nature of the general plot is getting old. Same thing all over again. A couple hours and a new layer of the bad guy hierarchy is revealed; last hour's top bad guy is shown getting a cell phone call from yet another, different bad guy who is above him, and so on.
Second, Lost:
Lost is a....lost cause. It started to suck last year. The spiraling plots are just a bunch of tangents going nowhere. Nefarious plot tangents brought up last year have never been resolved. You can't do that to an audience.
Third, Heroes:
Never got going. Great potential, jumped the shark right out of the gate. The cheerleader's father sucks and is a lousy character. The chick with the evil twin sucks--horrible storyline, horrible character. Everytime the bitch comes on, either one of them, the show grinds to a halt. Same with the cheerleader. Fucking awful character, the shows grinds to a halt every second she is on screen. Getting through each fucking episode is like wading through molasses. The dumbasses writing the show have no idea how to keep the audience interested. Just because you through in a twist 58 minutes into the show means nothing.
The President of the United States is in Cincinnati to throw out the first pitch for Opening Day. I wish I were still attending classes at the University of Cincinnati just so I could take in all the Bush-hate.
I won the office pool that I entered. I had 12 of the sweet 16 correct and UCLA and UCONN in the final. If it sounds like I'm bragging, I am. Why not, we all have to pimp ourselves every now and then. Too bad all the money I'm getting is going toward my wife's birthday present. I'm getting her an ipod. She had to go and use itunes to download songs, and since itunes crap won't play on things like creative labs mp3 players, which is less expensive, I have to buy the damn ipod.
Phil Hendrie dictionary item of the day, courtesy of sweetfeatheryjesus.com:
"Shark Shot": A standard maneuver taught to all members of the C.A.P (Citizen's Auxiliary Police). To be used when controlling a suspicious suspect. According to Jay Santos, the move is executed by "holding a riot stick like a pool cue and going right after the testicles".
A local black activist, Kabaka Oba, was shot outside Cincinnati city hall in broad daylight. This guy has been doing the "down with the man", "down with the PO-lice" thing for years. He has raised two sons--both are in prison. He calls himself a General. A General of what I do not know.
In the spring of.... 2001 I think....Cincinnati had riots for several days. The media portrayed the Cincinnati police as murderers, saying they killed 15 black men, and now things had reached a boiling point. That was a lie, in all but one instance the police were being fired upon by the suspect. Anyway, CBS called a local radio station yesterday asking "uh, hey, uh, you guys got any riots going on down there"?
Well CBS, the dude who shot him is black so they really can't blame whitey on this one. Then again, I'm sure they'll find a way. The cops had a covert plan to get these two mad at each then sat back and waited for one of them to shoot the other.
In the mid 1980s, Porsche introduced a supercar known as the 959. At the time, it was the most amazing automobile on the planet. Costing around $300,000, it featured technological wizardry that is still admirable in 2006. It has now been sent to the woodshed by the new Bugatti Veyron. The quad-turbo 16 cylinder Veyron is the most powerful production street car ever made (1000 bhp), the quickest ever, and the fastest ever. Only a select few will ever drive one, fewer still will own one, considering you will have to lay down over 1 million dollars to have one in your driveway.
How amazing is this street car? Consider this: Fitted with the proper tires, it would easily win any Nascar race as its top speed is 252 mph. That top speed is in Indy car territory.
The British automobile show "Top Gear" recently featured the Veyron. The show's host, Jeremy Clarkson, drove the car across France on his way to London. He was racing his two co-hosts, who were flying a Cessna in an attempt to beat him to London. They lost.
Top Gear is the best show about cars I've ever seen. It was briefly seen in America on the Discovery Channel, only to be yanked off (rumor is that Discovery is trying to produce an American version). It was a thoroughly British show, some of the cars were Europe-only models, they were right-hand drive, etc. Most of their pop-culture references were incomprehensible to an American viewer. But despite all that it is very entertaining and interesting.
The host of Top Gear is a tall, ungainly yob who frequently utters anti-American sentiments, as do the other hosts. It seems anti-Americanism is deeply embedded in their Id or Superego or whatever the hell the appropriate sub-conscious is for this example. They always trash American cars, but it doesn't stop there. Yet I still find episodes to watch from the internet--the show is too good to stop watching simply because of their bias.
